Latest / Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie / The Biggest Block To Receiving A Man Who Leads & How To Fix It

Transcript

The Biggest Block To Receiving A Man Who Leads & How To Fix It · Beyond Limits With Olivia Marie

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Live Well Podcast.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Liv, an Astropathic Doctor, Seminity Energy Healer, Akashic Reader, Intuitive, and Engagic Business Mentor.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: I help you heal on a physical and emotional level so that you can feel delicious in your health, body, relationships, career, and bank account.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: And this show is for those of you looking to really go beyond that basic wellness stuff and really create a life that you love.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's where I come in.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: In these episodes, we will have an honest conversation without the fluffy bullshit.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: We get to the point so that you can walk away with the insights, tools, and tips to truly live your best life, mind, body, and soul.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: So if you are looking to live well, you are in the right place.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: For ways to work with me, visit keepupwithlove.com and follow me on Instagram at keepup with love for more.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: And with that, let's get into the show.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: Hello everyone, and welcome back to another episode.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: I am so excited because this episode has been highly requested.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: We are diving into the biggest block to receiving a man who leads.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: And basically, how to receive a man who leads.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: So the number one thing that I want you to remember is that you cannot receive a man who leads when you are in your masculine.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: This is the biggest block that I see.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, you're pushing him away.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: Now, this applies whether you are currently in a relationship or you have an interest in entering one.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: And that's because you need polarity in a relationship.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: Polarity is not only what makes things like hot and steamy and juicy, but it's also what allows him to feel safe to lead.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: So telling him to do something or be something is not how you communicate with men.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: Alright?
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: Shaming a man is not the way to get him to lead.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: So when you think about when you are in your masculine and that looks like over-controlling, that looks like actually, we'll get into the kind of the signs that you're in your masculine in a second.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: But you guys have a preview.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: One of them is controlling.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: You end up emasculating him because you are in it and you don't have that polarity in the dynamic.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: In order for him to be safe to be in his masculine, you need to be in your feminine.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's where you need to take responsibility to put yourself in your feminine.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you are over-empowering his energy by you being your masculine and he's trying to be in your masculine, well, there's obviously no way he's going to lead, or there's not going to be that yummy kind of polarity between the two of you.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: So really think about like what is your delivery to him and how are you acting towards him?
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: That's probably why he's not leading.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: Because a man's natural energy is to give, he wants to lead.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: You just need to create a safe space to do so and not emasculate him.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: And it's not just what you say, but it's your energy and your body language.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to be covering all of this in Land the Man.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_00: There's gonna be a it's a two-part series.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: Both are live calls where you can also bring your personal questions, by the way, which makes it actually juicy and spicy.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: But we are gonna be covering all of these things, but kind of how to communicate with men.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna be talking about polarity, we're going to be talking about the language to use, how to stop mothering him, um, and really uncovering the blocks as to why you can't receive.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_00: So definitely join Land the Man if you really need help with this.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and I'm also gonna make it available for replay too, if you don't catch it live, because you'll still want to hear all of this information.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you are in your masculine, you will not have a man that leads.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: Now you also need to feel safe to be in your feminine, and you not being in your feminine is a trauma response to something that happened when you were younger or how the masculine was demonstrated for you.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: So essentially, you take on the role of the masculine because you can't let go of control, because you can't fully receive and be in flow.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: And then you end up blaming your husband, your partner, or stuff like there's no good men out there, but you're actually not open to receiving, and you can't receive in your feminine, and that's why.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: And now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying every man is the perfect masculine man, but there are plenty of men out there who want to lead, who want to take care of you, nourish you, and give you an amazing relationship, but you need to take the the look at yourself and like the mirror on yourself about where you are not comfortable receiving and where you are not fully in your feminine.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: I did open by the way, goddess activation.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you can check that out.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'll link this and Land the Man and all of that down below for those of you who really need to work on getting into your feminine, because if you are in your masculine, then that's going to affect the dynamics.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: Let's look at how do you know if you're in your masculine?
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: You're nagging him, you feel like you're a mother to him, you're controlling both things within your life and everything around you.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like that's just a sign.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: If you're controlling with your kids, you're controlling with anything, you're just in your masculine, right?
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_00: And that's gonna affect your relationships because where you're masculine in other areas, you're probably leaking that in unless you've really worked.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_00: Like, for example, me, I really worked at like, yes, I'm the masculine when I'm at work, when I'm with my clients, but I know how to switch that off and kind of switch gears after kind of like work is over, right?
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: So that there's a big difference.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I used to not be able to know how to do that, so I was just constantly stuck in my masculine.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: That's why, like, I'm literally I've been the masculine person, so I speak from experience.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: I wasn't always, you know, the feminine one who allowed men to lead.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I was not.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: So when I say all this from personal experience, it's what I've done, it's what I've helped hundreds of clients do now, and now I can help you.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: So, like I said, it looks like asking him to do something and then you just do it.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: Looks like you planning all the dates.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: It looks like being a perfectionist, being hyperbody focused, being burnt out, not being able to slow down and relax, wearing a badge of honor for hustling or being a super mom or super wife, having a low libido, all of this are signs that you're you're in your masculine.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I'll I'll mention a like a couple client examples because I think this is just so so pertinent.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: So, one of my voxer-only clients, guys, I love boxer only.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: Don't think like if you're not ready to jump into full one-on-one container with me, voxer only is a great way because you can talk to me day-to-day about your relationships, and I will tell you, like, give you personal strategies for what you're doing and how to shift the dynamic like quickly and right away.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I've also added that as a VIP option to land the man.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're interested in that, check that out.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: But for example, she really wants her boyfriend to clean, and she feels like she's his mother because she she's doing all the cleaning and he doesn't do the cleaning, he doesn't do there.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: Our boxer conversation.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, okay, but like, do you ask him to do the cleaning?
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: And like, how do you ask him to do the cleaning?
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: And the way she was asking him was very much in a mothering role.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's like mom telling you to clean your room.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: Well, then, like, that's the if you're taking on that energy, if you're taking on and that's how you're communicating with him, well, no wonder he's not in his masculine, no wonder he's not leading, because you are treating him like he's the little boy and he has to do the chores for mummy.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: So obviously he's not going to lead and be in his masculine, right?
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: And this is just like a small example, or you know, if he's not planning dates or whisking away or doing the things that you want him to, well, have you created a safe space to do so?
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_00: These are common things that are coming up.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, another one that's coming up that I'll say, um, because this has been a couple people now, of you know, he doesn't text me back right away.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's been two hours and he hasn't texted back.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, I just wanted to hop on here and remind you guys that both Land the Man and Goddess Activation are open right now.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_00: You can buy them separately or you can bundle them together.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: You end up saving if you bundle them together.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: Land the Man is all about receiving a man who leads and creating a relationship that nourishes your soul.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: It is a two-part live series where I will be covering the blocks to why you can't receive, how to communicate with men, how to stop mothering him and emasculating him, as well as creating polarity in the relationship that lets things be hot, lets him lead, but also is that nourishing, yummy, safe feeling in your soul.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: And then, of course, we have goddess activation for the woman who really wants to ignite her self-love, be intimate with herself, feel magnetic, show up in her power, and break down all of those things, all of the unworthiness that she's active, and ignites you into that goddess.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: We're going to be releasing self-doubt, we're going to be healing from perfectionism, setting boundaries, embodying a radical self-love, actually opening yourself to receive love, which kind of goes hand in hand within man, the frequency of self-love, trusting your intuition, tapping into your goddess power, connecting with your higher self, and really living in an alignment to become magnetic for all that you desire.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm so excited for both of these to be open right now.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like I said, those will be linked down below.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_00: If you have questions about either of them, definitely reach out.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: Very excited.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: Goddess Activation, you guys know, is one of my rider dive programs, and hundreds of women have seen profound shifts.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: So definitely check out the highlights on my Instagram page if you want to know about their experiences.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: And Land the Man is truly born for my soul after landing my man and helping so many one-on-one clients with this.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: I want to bring it to you guys in a way that if you can't join one-on-one yet, then you're able to learn all of this stuff from me.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: So, with that being said, let's go back and jump into the episode.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, it's been two hours.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like that's a trauma response of you not feeling safe to be in your feminine, and you need to be in your masculine because of the fear of rejection, abandonment, etc.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: So also know that you're probably in your masculine, like we said about how it was demonstrated for you, because it's unsafe to be in your feminine.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: So masculine for you is just a safety thing, it's a comfort thing that we can break you out of for sure.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_00: But normally, for example, this looks like how dad and mom were role-modeled to you.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: So I'll give a personal example and then I'll if I can think of a client one as I'm saying the personal one, I will.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: So personally, for me, I my dad wasn't around growing up, and my mom had like boyfriends and stuff like that, but no, no one ever that like I would call a stepdad or like I jived with if that makes sense.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_00: So for me and my mom being a single mom really took on kind of like the role of the I wouldn't call my mom a very flowy feminine type of person, I would call her very like a masculine type of energy, and so that's what was modeled to me, and that was safe.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: So then I took that on.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's like it is not safe to be flowy in order to be successful, in order to survive in life, and because I didn't have a safe, you know, masculine growing up as a role model, I flipped into my masculine as a safety protective thing of being it for myself, right?
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: So it took a lot of like trauma release and reprogramming to release that.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: But that you know, whether dad was there you or not, you could still have an unhealthy relationship with the masculine.
• 11:20
  unknown: Right.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: So for if your dad wasn't there, you definitely you know have that one.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: But if even if dad was there, he may not have been there the way you wanted him to be, or if he was there and you felt that he was very strong and mom was weak.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: Um, this actually came up with a one-on-one client last week where we got to the root of why she needed to control so much, because needing to control everything in life is you being in your masculine, and it was because her she had a great relationship with her dad.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: Her dad was like there, gave her attention, and was like a very strong um, you know, mentality, put lots of pressure on on her and her siblings growing up, but was there.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_00: But mom was very, the way she described it, as like a weak, was very jealous of her relationship with her dad.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: So her experience with the feminine was very turned off, it was very icky, it was very, I don't want to be like mom, because that's like a weird, like jealousy type of energy.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: Let me be like dad, and if I just control everything, then I'll be like dad, and dad will love me, right?
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: If I can be perfect, if I can control, right?
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_00: And that can just like these are just small things, and again, you might be aware of this, or you might need someone like me to kind of break this down for you because she didn't realize this.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_00: This was me, like she was we were going through a trauma release, we were peeling back all the layers in it, and it took like a little bit of time during our session together.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I kept peeling back, and then we got to one level, and I was like, Nope, there's something deeper, I could feel it.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: We went deeper and deeper when we got there.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: It was like she felt like she opened Pandora's box.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, oh my god, everything in life now it makes sense.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_00: So it's very important.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because it's only when you can identify why you're in your masculine and what made you feel like it's unsafe to be in your feminine that you can fully release it and move forward.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: But of course, you can learn how to not do so going forward.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: We can learn ways to kind of communicate with men properly.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_00: Like, for example, feelings are not facts to them.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: When when I see women try to, oh, this is another one um from one of my sessions last week.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: You try to communicate with feelings, they don't understand that.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: They that that that you're not talking to them in their language.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_00: Imagine if someone started talking, like, I don't know, Hebrew to you, and you don't speak Hebrew, and then you're wondering why they don't get it.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_00: Not you're not even wondering why they don't get it, you get angry why they don't understand when they're like a foreign person in Israel trying to understand Hebrew, and they're like, they don't get it, and they're trying the best that they can, and then you're yelling at them for not getting it when you're speaking a different language.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_00: You have to understand that men and women communicate differently, and you need to learn how to communicate in a way that a man can understand and be receptive to you.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, this there was another client last week who she wanted to get a massage because she was feeling like really stressed out, and the massage place only had like this one time on Saturday available, and it was the time they normally go to the farmer's market, and she she told him, not in the best way.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: Um basically in a way that is gonna start a fight and going to um make him feel less than, make him feel small, etc.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: And and it didn't, it turned into a big fight, and then he basically said, Well, I guess like if you're gonna go, you know, get massaged during the farmer's market, I'm gonna go do whatever during our farmer market, like family time, blah blah and got really upset.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: And it's because she did not communicate in the way to make him understand why that massage was important to him, or important to her, rather.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_00: So there's so many little examples I can give like this.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: That's why I'm going, otherwise, this would be a multi-hour episode.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to be going into this in Land the Man, so definitely join that.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_00: Join the VIP option if you feel like you want a one-on-one call with me, or you want voxer access to me.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_00: And then, of course, there's also goddess activation if you want to get into your feminine, and then if you feel like you want everything, there is um one-on-one option.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: So, depending on when you're listening to this, just send me a message, kind of tell me where you're at, and I'll tell you which one is the best one for you.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: But I'll also link everything down below.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: But just know that a man actually wants to lead, they want to take care of you.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: You just need to create a safe space to do so.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_00: And even if you're in a current relationship, I've shifted so many marriages, so many relationships with what I'm gonna be teaching in Land the Man because you can still change the polarity, you just gotta kind of learn.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: And it does take both of you, like it's a learning for you, it's a learning for them, but you'd be surprised like how the shifts will change, and you'll notice changes in their behavior that you didn't even ask for, and then they just kind of do it and leave, and you're like, Whoa, and this has happened to so many of my clients.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm really happy about that, and I cannot wait to get to help you guys with this because I remember when I took responsibility for like my part and of like making sure that I was creating a safe space for mental aid, it was completely different.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: And also think about this as like, are you can you receive compliments from a man, you know, walking around?
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_00: Can you have them hold the door open for you?
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: Like, do you let the men actually do things for you?
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_00: If you're I don't know, struggling with a package.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I remember I used to be like, oh no, I I got it, I can carry it up myself.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like in my condo, and I was like, that's not letting a man lead.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: So like now I would like before when I leave in the house, I would let like my concierge like carry everything up with me.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: Or if a man offered me help, yeah, or my suitcase at the airport, yeah, let him take it off the the roundabout thing.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: Um there's so many small examples, so sort of to be aware of those in your life, because I guarantee you there are some there where you're not even necessarily not letting your man lead or men in that you're in a relationship with, but also just men in general in the world, and that's also gonna affect your relationship, right?
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_00: Um, which then could go into the whole like the problem with you know women being able to do everything, and like, yes, we can do everything, but we don't have to, and that's amazing.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: Like half the things I get my fiance to do, yeah, I could do them, but like I don't I don't want to, like I don't have to, right?
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because that's not like my zone of genius, like my patio furniture.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_00: Like I could have put that together today, and there's this whole like I could have been a strong, independent woman and like done it myself, but also like he's better at building things than I am, so like I just had him build my patio furniture.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't even have to ask, right?
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I just said, Oh, the patio furniture like arrived, and the first thing he did today was like build it.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, sweet, cool.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what you need, and that's what you deserve, right?
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_00: So we're gonna be working through all of that.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know if you have any more questions when it comes to this stuff.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm happy to do more little podcast episodes.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_00: I like breaking it down like this in short mini episodes for you so you can come back and listen to them, and it makes it digestible.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_00: So let me know what more questions you have.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_00: Join Land the Man or God's activation or one on one, whatever you feel like you need, and I will talk to you in the next episode.