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Why We Do What We Do The Way We Do What We Do: Intergenerational Church · Providence Baptist Church - Sermons

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As previously mentioned, this is a bit of an abnormal Sunday morning in that we actually won't spend much time in Ephesians chapter 6 or any other particular text.
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!
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So, we're going to talk about how it is that God intends for children to be trained, and we're having to apply our thoughts for our culture and draw out then how it is we should best do this thing.
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So, we'll look, and we'll look at some of the clear commands to parents to train up their children, the fear and admonition of the Lord, and then we'll talk about how and the why of what we're doing here.
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I'd fit this sermon into a category of sermons that we kind of do periodically, why we do what we do and why we do what we do the way we do what we do, which sounds funny to hear.
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It's even funnier to type it out, so if you ever are at your computer and you need a laugh, type that sentence, why we do what we do and why we do what we do the way we do what we do.
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And I think it's timely. There's just times we need to stop and pause and think together about how it is that we arrange ourselves as a church, work within the gray areas of the commands of God for church,
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put some clear boundaries on what we should do together as a church, but then how do we carry all of it out together.
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Certainly, our fellowship is odd in a lot of ways, and there are going to be guests amongst us who will come and go, what in the world?
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And at very least, we need to have these kinds of conversations so that you can say, well, let me explain to you why we do what we do and why we do what we do the way we do what we do.
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You need to be able, for the sake of guests or those that you might invite to prime them so you become part of the messaging of our church.
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We also find that some parents in our church may need some help in the process of training children,
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children, and it certainly could be helpful to have convictions renewed, to again remember the why of it.
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Oh yeah, it's so good, the why, which fuels us to work on the how of it.
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Some may need just some practical help, just some things that have been learned across the years
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as a congregation of having children meet with us in our services together.
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And I think that some of the non-parents in the room, so I think this time together shouldn't be lost on those without children.
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It's not just necessarily for you thinking about having children someday,
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but that you would consider how it is you ought to participate as we work together as a people to raise children.
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God has saved people, not just you.
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Certainly I hope that's true of you, that He has in fact saved you.
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But more than that, the higher thought is that as Jesus hung on the cross and received the wrath of God,
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He was receiving the wrath of God for the sins of the church.
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He called out a people for His possession.
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And therefore, when we come together with the church, we shouldn't be only thinking about our interests.
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We should be looking instead to the interests of others and considering how it is that we can serve others,
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preferring them over ourselves.
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And so there's things I think this morning that need to be said that are going to be beneficial for all of us
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as we work together to be an intergenerational church.
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And let me explain why that word, what a word it is.
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Very often our church gets framed as a family-integrated church.
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And I shy away from that term, and I hear many of you still use the term family-integrated,
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which very often simply means kids are in the service.
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And that's usually how you're using it when you do that.
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However, I prefer that we not use that term because of what often gets connected with that.
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In fact, there are many who would suggest that if you do not have children in your main gathering with you,
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that you're in sin, the church is not doing church as God intended the church to be done.
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And I will tell you right now that we don't hold that view.
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We're not looking down our noses at every other church in our area that may have something provided for children
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during the main gathering and saying, not a biblical church.
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We're not doing that.
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And some that would call themselves family-integrated, not all, but some do in fact do that.
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And so I think that's a thing we want to be careful of.
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We have had guests, families, guests here that feel that way after leaving.
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They say, we can't do this thing, and we don't appreciate that you're telling us we're wrong to go to any other church.
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And I go, we didn't say that.
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Well, some of you have, in essence, said that to these families.
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So we want to be really, really clear about that, right?
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We are trying to apply biblical wisdom in the way we meet.
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You'll hear me say often, this seems like the best thing right now to help us follow the commands of God.
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I don't think it's the only way to accomplish this.
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I also decided not to use the term multi-generational, and many of you might think that'd be an easier word to use.
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But as I think about educational disciplines, when you bring together multiple disciplines to accomplish a goal,
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this is often called multidisciplinary work.
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But each person has their own expertise, and they come and they offer their expertise to solve a solution.
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Intergenerational communicates something a little bit different.
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Interdisciplinary work means that certainly some people may have an expertise,
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but they come together and they learn each other's expertises in order to solve a problem.
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It has a much more together feel to it.
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And so, we are a faith family.
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We're meant to be working to that kind of degree of relationship, right?
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That we pick up and bear each other's burdens and offer support and help in that way,
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which is why I prefer the term intergenerational.
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And so, as we talk about being an intergenerational church,
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it doesn't just mean that kids are in the service with us.
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It means that we're a gathering of believers that love and care for all generations, right?
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Titus chapter 2 ministry, right?
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Older men and older women ministering to younger men and younger women.
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Because we believe that all generations add to the vitality of the church, right?
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That we need one another in walking out the Christian faith.
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You have heard me say, and maybe I'm unintentionally becoming known for saying,
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if you always hang out with your idiot friends, you'll always be an idiot.
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And I don't mean to insult your friends, right?
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But if you find yourself in a demographic box,
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you don't get the shared experience of people outside of that particular demographic.
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And so, we need one another, right?
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I need parents who have gone before me as an example, right?
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Both the lessons that they learned in how not to do things,
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as well as how to do things.
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I need people I can ask questions of.
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I need the zeal of young people in our church, right?
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It is very easy for me to get comfortable.
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Man, I love having a bunch of young people who are ready to go take on the world with the gospel of Jesus Christ.
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I need to be spurred on in that way.
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These are just some examples of how it is we come together as an intergenerational church,
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seeking to honor God with all that we do together.
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One aspect of that, one aspect, and it seems to be a prominent aspect,
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it's certainly the most contested application of that thinking,
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is that we encourage congregants to bring their children to sit with us in the congregational gathering.
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This is certainly not without its pains, right?
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We do have our moments, don't we?
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I've said to you before, of all people,
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I'm preaching and trying to keep a train of thought,
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that when there's the outburst, I'm with you in that.
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We push through and we press on.
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And we do so because there's something that undergirds this type of thinking.
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There's a reason that we are gathering together in this way.
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Let me again say, we do not assert that it is wrong to age segregate.
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We have, I talked about it earlier this morning,
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a time on Sunday evenings where we're going to do that very thing.
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We're going to have some stuff for kids,
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and we're going to have some stuff for adults.
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Certainly there's times where it's good for us to gender segregate,
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let the women get together and talk about things that guys don't want to hear about,
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and vice versa for the ladies.
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There are moments for this.
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And certainly a church can.
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I think it's possible.
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I just think it's difficult in our age.
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Have programs provided for children and still encourage and support
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and find parents living out their God-given responsibility
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to train up their children in the fear and admonition of the Lord.
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I do think this is possible.
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We just see that we live in a culture that's so highly specialized
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that parents are so quick,
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so ready to give away their responsibilities
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to the quote-unquote professionals.
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So often with schools, with coaches.
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And we see this very thing happen in the church as well.
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We, without intention, often in our culture,
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reduce parents to merely being chauffeurs,
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just getting kids to the place that they're meant to be,
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where the highly trained professional can help them.
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And the Bible doesn't speak in these terms, beloved.
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The Bible never commands the church to raise children.
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The Bible never commands a particular parachurch ministry to raise children.
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The Bible commands parents to raise children.
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And so you can take comfort as a parent that this command has been given to you
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and therefore the grace necessary to fulfill it will be also given to you.
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And you don't have to give away this responsibility to another.
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And so that's what we're hoping to accomplish.
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We're hoping to very clearly place that responsibility on the shoulders of parents
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and then do all kinds of things, which we'll talk about in a bit,
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to support that work, right?
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To say, this is a heavy load and we want to bear it with you.
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But it is your load.
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In the great day of judgment, I'll be held accountable for all kinds of things that I do
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and say and feel.
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Certainly my leadership of many of you.
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But I don't believe that I'm going to be held accountable for the children of our church.
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I think that accountability is going to be yours.
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My part in that is how have I helped you pastor your kids in your home?
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And that's why we want to be careful about how we do this very thing.
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So CFC as an intergenerational church believe it's a parent's full responsibility,
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full responsibility to train children and teach them how to worship and learn about God.
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So quickly, let's look at Ephesians chapter 6 and verse 4.
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And I'll look at a couple of other passages as well.
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Right after a command for children to obey their parents,
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in verse 4, Paul says,
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Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger,
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but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
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So it's commanded here, right?
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And a few other places.
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Deuteronomy chapter 6 and verse 7.
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You shall teach the commandments of God diligently to your children
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and shall talk of them when you sit in your house
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and when you walk by the way
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and when you lie down
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and when you rise.
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There's a general application of wisdom given to us
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from Proverbs chapter 22 and verse 6.
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Train up a child in the way he should go.
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Even when he is old,
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he will not depart from it.
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And so we have these very clear commands to us as parents
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to train our children.
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It's our responsibility to educate.
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Parents, even if someone else is doing that,
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if your child is in public school,
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for example,
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you are responsible for what they are learning.
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You need to be aware of their curriculum.
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You need to be asking them many tough questions.
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And oh, the discernment our young people need
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as they're in public education.
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We have to labor in this
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because the labor has been given to us.
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Non-parents,
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we want to support the parents in our church.
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We want to do everything that we can
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to help them pick up this mighty task
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that has been given to the parents of our church.
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The 19th century English Baptist pastor,
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you guys know I love,
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Charles Spurgeon,
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who was a big proponent of Sunday school,
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which was four children at its inception,
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once said,
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let no Christians fall into the delusion
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that Sunday school is intended to ease them
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of their parental duties.
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The first and most natural condition of things
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is for Christian parents
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to train up their own children
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in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
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And so anything that we do together as a church
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or a relationship you might even develop
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with the child that is not your own
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ought to be done in support of
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that work of parents with their kids.
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That's why I pray on Sunday morning
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with the kids from Lethia Way.
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We ask that what we do here
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and what these children's parents do with them
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day in and day out in their homes
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turn them to repentance and to faith.
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We merely want to come alongside, right?
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Because it is biblical for parents
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to bear the responsibility for child training.
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Our children need to be taught the things of God
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and they need to be taught
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that they stand in this world
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underneath the authority of God
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and under your authority as parents.
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This is so incredibly important for them
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that they see what good, loving, kind authority
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looks like in their lives, right?
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Corrected and trained for their good.
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We talk all the time with our boys
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about disciplinary action after the fact,
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after one of them has bent over a knee
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and they have gone and thought about what they did.
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We ask, why is it important to obey your parents?
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And the answer that we are always prodding along
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is because God who loves them gave us to them
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and we love them.
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We love you.
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That's why you need to obey.
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Our children should be learning this
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through our parenting, right?
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Beyond just the specifics of what we teach,
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they need to be learning
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that the world functions with authority, right?
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God first and foremost
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and then subservient authorities under that.
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A great problem with our society today
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is that there are so many who function
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as if there is no authority
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and there is no consequence
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for anything that they do.
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And boy, are they grossly awoken
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when consequences do in fact arise, right?
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There is authority placed over us.
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We are not completely free
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to do whatever we would do.
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Praise the Lord, right?
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He governs over us.
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He keeps us safe.
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He restrains our wickedness by these things.
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And our children need to learn this.
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So, it's biblical for parents
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to bear the responsibility
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for child training.
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Children need to learn authority.
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They need to be also trained to learn.
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This is not a thing
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that children pick up immediately.
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I think we might have in our congregation
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some kindergarten teachers,
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if not some that are in those early years.
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And they know that one of the major works
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that's done when a child is already
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five and six years old
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in the public school system
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is to get them to sit still
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and to be quiet and to pay attention.
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They should learn this much before that happens, right?
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Long before.
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They waste almost a year
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of that education
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just learning to learn.
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We are meant as parents, right?
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To instruct, to show them
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how it is they're meant to act later in life.
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Sam and I remind each other often
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that we're not raising boys.
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We're raising men, right?
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We're starting with the end in mind.
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Who do we want these young boys to become?
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And oh, the many years of work
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it will take to get them to that place.
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And now as my oldest is eight,
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I see those years fleeting.
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They're going by so very quick.
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There is so much work to be done
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with our children.
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We primarily want our children
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to learn, to learn,
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because we want them to learn
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the things of God, right?
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That they would understand
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who God is
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and His righteous requirement of them.
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That they would see
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their absolute inability
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to keep His good commands.
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And that they would flee to Christ
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by repentance and faith.
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We want our children
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to be able to listen to
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and understand the instruction
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of the Bible.
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Romans 10.17 says that
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faith comes from hearing
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and hearing through the Word of Christ.
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Children and others,
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or parents and others,
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if we care about the children
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of our church,
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we should care that they're being trained
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to learn.
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To learn the things that matter most
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in their lives.
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We want the Word of God
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to be accompanied by
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the Spirit of God
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that our children would believe.
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Spurgeon, again, says,
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it is not your instruction
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that can save the souls
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of your children.
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It is the blessing
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of the Holy Spirit
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accompanying your labors.
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So parents,
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we get in there
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and we work,
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we teach,
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we teach,
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we teach,
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we teach,
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we teach and we pray
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that God would save
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our kids.
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Our efforts are so
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incredibly feeble.
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But we can take heart
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that the lives of our children
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lay not in our hands,
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but in the hands
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of our good
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and faithful Father.
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See,
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I can press on.
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That's no problem.
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So children need to be trained
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to learn.
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Children also
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need to be trained
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to be part
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of a church.
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By sending children
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to a different room
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to be separated
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from the
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quote-unquote
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adult service,
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they learn
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that whatever
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is taking place
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in the church gathering
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is not meant
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for them.
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If little ones
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are starting off
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in circumstances
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that make it seem
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like they are not
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valued in the church,
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when does that
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thinking change?
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When are they taught
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that it is simply
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not true?
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We value you
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when you turn
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five.
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The things of God
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are going to be
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made available to you
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when you turn
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three,
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whatever that
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may be.
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When do we begin
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helping our kids
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understand
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that what we do
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together as a church
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is valuable,
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which means it's
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valuable for all
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of us?
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in many churches,
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the youth have
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their own service.
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If you're a teenager,
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you're pulled out
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of the quote-unquote
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adult service,
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which are often
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just an extension
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of children's church.
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The kids haven't
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learned,
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right,
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how to sit
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and to listen
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and to appreciate
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the things of God.
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And in many churches,
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the adult service
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has become
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little more
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than an extension
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of the youth service.
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It's centered
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on entertainment,
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wrapped up
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in emotion
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because
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these adults
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have never been
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taught to grow up.
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Our Christian culture
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is failing to train,
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so we have many
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spiritual adolescents
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and adults
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of our day.
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This is a
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tragic thing
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kids need
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to learn.
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Some of you
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probably came here
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and at the outset
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thought,
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this is kind of boring.
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You're likely
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a result
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of the culture
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that entertained you
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and entertained you
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and entertained you.
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And while we want
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people to really enjoy
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when we gather together,
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we're not being boring
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by design.
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I want you to know
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that it is also okay
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with us as a church
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if what we do
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is a bit boring
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to the nominal Christian
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who comes in and says,
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I just don't feel
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entertained.
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The plea to them
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is, well then grow up.
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We're talking about
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the things of God.
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We're singing
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and praying
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and opening up
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the scripture together.
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So you see how
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we can as a church
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start early
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and I hope
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turn the tide
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of this young generation.
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We want to raise,
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as the Puritans
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would say,
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churchmen.
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I want my boys
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to understand
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the great value
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of the congregation
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gathering together
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and doing deep
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and weighty things
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to the glory of God.
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So children need
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to be trained
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to be a part
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of the church.
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Children need
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to be trained
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for self-control.
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people.
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And we have had
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just so many,
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and so many parents
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that I would say
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are great parents
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come and say,
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we just can't do it.
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We just can't do it.
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It is not unreasonable
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to expect a child
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to be able to learn,
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learn,
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to process,
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to sit through
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an entire sermon.
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It is not unreasonable.
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If we believe
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an hour's worth
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of good behavior
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is too much
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to ask
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of our children,
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then we are fiercely
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underestimating
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our children.
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If you begin
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to actually throw
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some effort
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into training your kids,
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you will be astounded
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at what they can
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accomplish.
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I'm going to use
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as an example,
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and we are not
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a perfect example.
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My wife,
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I think with fair success,
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pulls it off
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each week
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for the last
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eight years
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with no help
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from me.
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If you have
25:39
both a mom
25:39
and a dad
25:39
sitting with your kids,
25:41
you are at a great
25:42
advantage
25:43
to my family,
25:46
and yet somehow
25:47
from age two,
25:49
and we can even
25:50
back up,
25:50
Silas was much younger,
25:53
they are able
25:54
to sit
25:54
and do that work,
25:55
and it is not
25:56
because our kids
25:56
are just good tempered.
25:59
They are not.
26:00
I have wonderful
26:03
children,
26:04
but they have
26:05
had to be trained.
26:07
They have had to
26:07
learn how to do
26:08
what it is
26:10
they are doing
26:10
here and in other
26:11
places as well.
26:13
We have to teach
26:14
them self-control.
26:15
I am fearful
26:16
for this generation
26:17
and their ability
26:18
to hold jobs
26:20
because guess what?
26:21
A lot of life
26:22
is going to be
26:24
mundane
26:24
and boring.
26:26
You are going to
26:27
sit down at a job
26:27
and do data entry
26:28
for eight hours
26:29
a day,
26:30
but as a child
26:32
you can't sit
26:32
still for an hour.
26:34
Oh, the tragedy
26:35
that will ensue
26:36
from such a thing.
26:39
Silas, my two-year-old,
26:40
is sitting very quietly,
26:41
at least at this moment.
26:43
Hey, buddy.
26:45
And doing quite well.
26:47
Sam's going,
26:48
yes, he's doing well.
26:50
Don't interrupt.
26:51
Don't interrupt
26:51
what he's doing well.
26:54
But by teaching
26:56
our children
26:58
to sit through
26:58
a church gathering,
27:00
they're learning
27:01
a number of
27:02
important and
27:02
profitable habits
27:03
that translate
27:04
into other areas
27:06
of their life.
27:08
The youngest children
27:10
amongst us
27:11
are primarily
27:12
learning self-control.
27:14
People say,
27:14
why are you having
27:15
the kids in the service?
27:17
What's the point?
27:18
Clearly,
27:19
I'm not going to go
27:20
and ask Silas later
27:21
what he learned
27:22
from the sermon.
27:23
He has no idea
27:24
what I'm talking about.
27:25
He heard his name
27:26
and he looked up.
27:27
That was the extent of it.
27:28
But he's learning
27:29
something extremely important
27:30
which is going to feed
27:31
into many greater
27:33
and more important things.
27:35
He's learning
27:35
to sit still now
27:36
and then he'll begin
27:38
to learn from sermons
27:40
as time progresses on.
27:43
So it does matter.
27:44
It is helpful
27:46
and important.
27:48
Our little ones
27:50
have an absolute,
27:51
I mean,
27:52
it is incredible
27:52
how much energy
27:53
they have,
27:54
isn't it?
27:54
I mean,
27:54
it is just oozing
27:56
out of them
27:57
and they're going
27:58
to need to learn
27:58
how to dial it back
28:00
and to sit down
28:02
and to be quiet.
28:05
Children also gain perspective
28:07
by being trained
28:09
to stay
28:09
for the congregational gathering.
28:11
They come to understand
28:12
that not everything
28:14
revolves around
28:15
their need
28:16
for entertainment.
28:17
They are learning
28:20
at a very,
28:21
very young age
28:22
to put others
28:24
before themselves.
28:26
We have had
28:27
countless conversations
28:28
with our children
28:29
about not being distracting
28:30
to others
28:31
because others
28:32
are here to listen
28:33
or to sing
28:34
or to, right?
28:35
That what they do
28:36
affects other people
28:38
and they should be concerned
28:39
about that type
28:41
of thing.
28:42
from a very early age
28:44
they're able
28:44
to begin
28:46
getting this concept.
28:48
Like,
28:48
this is a huge thing
28:49
for us to even understand
28:50
as adults.
28:52
How much better
28:53
if we start early?
28:54
Like,
28:54
we get the seed
28:55
planted in them
28:56
and it begins to grow
28:58
so they will begin
28:58
to understand
28:59
the world
29:00
does not revolve
29:02
around you.
29:05
Right?
29:05
So,
29:06
doing this
29:07
takes work.
29:10
It takes work.
29:13
Know that
29:13
sacrifice is required
29:15
and your patience
29:17
will probably run out
29:18
before
29:19
it gets stronger.
29:23
But it's also important
29:24
to know
29:25
that as a church
29:26
we've made a commitment
29:27
to working this out
29:29
together
29:30
that we're
29:31
here for you.
29:32
You're not alone
29:33
in this effort.
29:36
We are pleased
29:37
that if you are here
29:38
that you are even
29:40
giving it an effort.
29:41
Like,
29:41
that is a wonderful,
29:42
wonderful thing
29:43
that you're
29:44
trying
29:45
to do this
29:46
and you need
29:46
to be encouraged
29:47
in continuing
29:48
to try
29:50
to do this.
29:52
And so,
29:53
in the effort
29:53
of doing it,
29:54
let me just give you
29:55
some practical tips
29:57
for the how.
30:00
First,
30:01
we cherish
30:03
Sunday mornings.
30:06
The most valuable step
30:07
in training
30:08
a child
30:08
to sit through
30:09
and participate
30:10
in church gatherings
30:12
is to cherish
30:14
church gatherings.
30:16
Parents,
30:18
if you don't act
30:19
like you're happy
30:20
to be here,
30:21
your children
30:22
are going to pick
30:22
that up.
30:24
It's a great service
30:25
to them
30:25
if you make
30:26
Sunday
30:27
the most important
30:29
day of the week.
30:30
If you're excited
30:32
about what we get
30:33
to do
30:34
together
30:35
on Sundays,
30:37
we sat through
30:38
a particularly
30:38
long thing
30:40
where the boys
30:41
were expected
30:41
to be quiet
30:42
and when we got
30:43
out from it,
30:44
Cade noted
30:45
that it was
30:45
longer
30:46
than a church
30:47
gathering
30:48
and Judah said
30:50
it was more
30:50
boring
30:51
than a church
30:51
gathering.
30:53
And,
30:54
of course,
30:55
for a second
30:56
my feelings
30:56
are hurt
30:57
because I don't
30:57
really want
30:58
our gatherings
30:59
to be boring
31:00
to my children.
31:01
It's not what
31:01
I hope for
31:02
them,
31:03
but it gave me
31:04
an opportunity
31:04
to talk about
31:05
why it shouldn't
31:06
be boring
31:06
to them.
31:07
Oh,
31:08
it's the greatest
31:08
thing we do.
31:10
It's way better
31:11
than,
31:11
and I can fill
31:12
in the multiple
31:12
blanks of things
31:13
that my children
31:13
really enjoy
31:15
going to go do,
31:17
but to show them
31:18
that I think
31:19
it's the most
31:20
important thing.
31:21
I think
31:22
it's best.
31:24
Non-parents,
31:25
you can help
31:25
us with this,
31:26
right?
31:27
Being attentive,
31:29
right?
31:29
Showing up
31:30
on time,
31:31
minimizing
31:32
bathroom breaks,
31:34
right?
31:34
Show the kids
31:35
around you
31:36
that what we're
31:37
doing is important
31:38
to you,
31:40
right?
31:40
I love as much
31:41
as the next person
31:41
when a kid is
31:42
on a parent's
31:43
shoulder and
31:43
they're smiling
31:44
at me.
31:45
Don't start
31:45
entertaining them.
31:47
Smile back
31:48
and then pay
31:48
attention,
31:49
right?
31:49
That's the thing
31:50
you can do
31:50
for them.
31:51
Stare beyond
31:52
them to what's
31:53
happening with
31:55
us in the room
31:56
at that time.
31:57
Whether you
31:59
treat being
32:00
at church
32:00
as a delight
32:01
or as a duty,
32:04
your children
32:04
will notice.
32:06
It will make
32:06
a difference
32:07
to them
32:07
and impact
32:08
their young
32:08
hearts.
32:09
The contemporary
32:10
pastor,
32:10
John Piper,
32:11
suggests that
32:12
parents should
32:13
be jealous
32:14
to model
32:14
for their
32:15
children
32:15
the tremendous
32:16
value they
32:17
put on reverence
32:18
in the presence
32:20
of Almighty
32:21
God.
32:22
This is a
32:22
great work.
32:23
Okay?
32:23
So we cherish
32:24
Sunday mornings.
32:25
We also
32:27
practice.
32:29
This is a
32:30
step that is
32:30
often overlooked.
32:33
Children do
32:34
not have tests
32:34
without homework,
32:36
ideally,
32:37
and they're
32:38
not put into
32:38
a game
32:39
without first
32:40
going to
32:40
practice,
32:42
ideally,
32:43
right?
32:44
You cannot
32:45
expect that
32:45
this is the
32:46
best place
32:46
to train
32:47
a child.
32:48
It just
32:49
isn't the
32:50
best place
32:50
to train
32:51
a child.
32:52
We
32:53
discipline
32:55
our children
32:56
differently
32:57
in our
32:57
living room
32:58
than we
32:58
could in
32:59
this room.
33:00
Now,
33:00
they could
33:00
get taken
33:00
out of
33:01
this room
33:01
and disciplined
33:02
in the same
33:03
way,
33:04
but I am
33:05
much more
33:06
quick to
33:06
deliver discipline
33:07
of the
33:08
physical form
33:09
in my
33:10
living room
33:11
than I
33:11
would be
33:12
here.
33:12
I don't
33:13
think people
33:14
would appreciate
33:15
hearing a little
33:15
outcry and
33:16
hearing the
33:17
smack that
33:17
would follow
33:18
that,
33:20
and then the
33:20
crying that
33:21
would ensue.
33:22
This isn't
33:23
the best
33:23
place.
33:25
And we
33:25
across the
33:25
years have
33:27
encountered
33:28
a parent that
33:29
really tries to
33:30
work it out
33:30
here,
33:30
and so there's
33:31
the noise
33:31
and the
33:32
shh and
33:33
the noise
33:33
and the
33:33
shh and
33:34
the noise
33:34
and the
33:34
shh and
33:35
the noise
33:35
and the
33:35
shh and
33:36
the noise
33:36
and the
33:36
shh.
33:38
And it's
33:38
more distracting.
33:40
And the
33:40
child's not
33:41
comprehending
33:41
what's going
33:42
on in
33:43
that space.
33:44
It's not
33:45
actually the
33:46
thing that's
33:47
most needful,
33:48
right?
33:48
What they
33:48
need is to
33:49
be trained at
33:50
home and
33:51
then brought
33:51
here,
33:52
and we'll
33:52
talk a bit
33:52
more about
33:53
placing
33:54
expectations and
33:55
consequences on
33:56
the children at
33:57
that time.
33:58
The practice
33:59
at home is
34:00
absolutely
34:01
necessary.
34:04
Start small,
34:06
take steps,
34:08
best suit your
34:08
children and
34:09
their age,
34:10
and grow in
34:11
it.
34:11
So a
34:12
wonderful
34:13
suggestion from
34:14
the Zwimkes.
34:15
If you don't
34:16
know the Zwimkes,
34:16
I am sorry for
34:17
that.
34:17
previous members
34:18
of our
34:18
church that
34:18
are serving
34:19
in Germany
34:20
right now,
34:21
every one of
34:22
their five
34:22
girls,
34:23
Kathleen did
34:24
what she
34:24
called blanket
34:25
time,
34:26
and she did
34:27
that largely.
34:28
She was
34:28
training them
34:28
up to
34:29
self-discipline,
34:30
but she did
34:30
that largely
34:31
to have the
34:31
kids in the
34:32
service,
34:33
gave them a
34:34
blanket with
34:34
quiet toys,
34:36
and expected
34:36
them to be
34:37
quiet,
34:38
in infancy,
34:39
to be quiet.
34:40
She was able
34:41
to sit with
34:41
them and
34:42
correct them,
34:43
to be right
34:43
there and
34:44
ready to
34:45
bring correction
34:46
to help them
34:47
understand what
34:47
that looks like.
34:48
So you could
34:49
do something
34:49
like that at
34:50
home and
34:51
then bring it
34:51
here as well.
34:53
You're welcome
34:54
to put a
34:54
blanket in the
34:55
aisle.
34:55
The fire
34:56
inspector never
34:57
shows up on
34:58
a Sunday
34:58
morning.
34:59
So think
35:01
about things
35:01
you could
35:02
implement at
35:02
home and
35:03
then bring
35:03
with you here.
35:05
We, with our
35:05
boys, had a
35:07
little seat that
35:08
you strapped a
35:08
kid into,
35:09
and we worked
35:10
at home on
35:10
helping them
35:11
learn to be
35:11
quiet at
35:12
home, and
35:13
they sat in
35:13
a chair here,
35:14
and it made
35:15
sense to them.
35:15
If I sit here,
35:16
I can nibble on
35:17
Cheerios as long
35:18
as I'm quiet.
35:20
So you can work
35:21
on these types
35:23
of things.
35:24
You could have
35:25
other forms of
35:26
quiet play with
35:26
older kids, and
35:28
let me tell you,
35:29
if you're a parent
35:30
and you feel like
35:30
you have no extra
35:31
time in your day,
35:31
you are going to
35:32
love doing this
35:33
kind of training
35:34
because it's
35:34
going to give
35:34
you time in
35:36
your day.
35:36
We do at our
35:37
house, I call it
35:38
book time.
35:39
The boys know
35:40
exactly what I'm
35:40
talking about,
35:41
and it's usually
35:41
when my brain's
35:43
about to explode
35:44
from the noise
35:44
in the house,
35:45
and I've almost
35:46
always got a book
35:46
with me that I
35:47
would love to
35:47
read, and I
35:48
sit them on the
35:50
couch.
35:50
They get a big
35:50
stack of books
35:51
each, and they
35:51
sit on the couch.
35:52
They were doing
35:52
this before any
35:53
of them were
35:54
readers, just
35:54
looking at pages
35:56
of books, and I
35:57
sit in a chair next
35:58
to them, and I
35:59
can bring
36:00
correction, verbal
36:01
correction, loudly,
36:03
Judah.
36:04
Judah, we're being
36:06
quiet right now.
36:07
You know you're
36:08
supposed to be
36:08
quiet.
36:09
And we worked
36:10
our time up in
36:11
that way, so now
36:12
I expect 45
36:13
minutes, and they
36:14
sit there very
36:15
quietly for 45
36:15
minutes and look
36:17
at books, and
36:17
we're working with
36:18
our two-year-old
36:19
Silas to join in
36:20
on that.
36:21
I expect it for a
36:22
while, and then I'll
36:23
let him off the
36:24
couch and go do
36:24
something else,
36:25
because his poor
36:26
little body is
36:27
freaking out.
36:29
Right?
36:29
So you need to
36:31
practice at home, and
36:32
you need to be
36:33
appropriate, and you
36:34
need to work your
36:34
way up.
36:36
It's difficult to
36:37
expect absolute
36:38
silence from your
36:40
children.
36:41
Please know I don't
36:42
expect absolute
36:43
silence from your
36:45
children, but your
36:46
children can be
36:47
taught to control
36:48
their volume.
36:50
Even a little one
36:51
can learn how to
36:52
whisper.
36:53
I use a hand
36:54
symbol.
36:55
Instead of shushing,
36:56
I go like this, and
36:58
they get it.
36:58
Because when I go
36:59
like this, I start
37:00
talking more
37:01
quietly.
37:01
And it's really
37:02
incredible how
37:03
smart they are, and
37:04
how they can pick
37:04
that kind of thing
37:05
up.
37:06
So you can teach
37:07
your kids to bring
37:08
their volume down,
37:09
so that if they do
37:10
need something when
37:12
we're meeting
37:12
together, they can
37:13
ask for it
37:15
appropriately.
37:17
Right?
37:19
If you need to,
37:20
sit with your kids,
37:22
join them on the
37:23
couch, on the
37:24
floor, set some
37:26
time aside in your
37:27
day to actually
37:28
show them what it
37:30
looks like to do
37:31
the thing you're
37:31
asking them to do.
37:33
Like, don't give
37:33
them a far-off
37:35
concept of what it
37:36
means to sit
37:36
quietly.
37:38
Tell them and then
37:39
show them what it
37:40
looks like to sit
37:41
quietly.
37:42
We periodically have
37:43
a little share
37:44
circle in our house,
37:45
and I teach the
37:46
kids how to ask
37:46
nicely and to share,
37:48
and I'm still doing
37:49
this with our
37:49
eight-year-old who
37:50
now thinks it's the
37:51
most boring,
37:52
ridiculous task, but
37:53
yet hasn't learned
37:54
how to do it.
37:55
And so we model
37:57
what it looks like.
37:58
Right?
37:58
And we're looping
37:59
now a two-year-old
38:00
into that process of
38:01
asking nicely and
38:02
saying, thank you.
38:04
And if your brother's
38:05
not ready to share
38:05
yet, what do you do?
38:07
Right?
38:07
You don't yell and
38:08
hit.
38:09
So our children need
38:10
this kind of thing
38:11
modeled out for them.
38:13
The greatest benefit
38:14
gained from practicing
38:15
at home is being
38:17
able to continually
38:19
worship as a family
38:20
throughout the week.
38:22
So you can train at
38:24
home by doing
38:24
family worship at
38:26
home.
38:26
Picking up these
38:27
important things that
38:28
we do on Sunday
38:29
mornings and doing
38:30
that in your home as
38:31
well.
38:32
It's a wondrous thing
38:33
for children to
38:34
understand that God
38:35
does not only exist
38:37
on Sundays.
38:39
This building isn't
38:40
somehow holy, the
38:41
place in which we
38:42
come and meet with
38:44
him.
38:44
But those who are
38:45
God's people are
38:46
God's dwelling place.
38:48
And so in every day,
38:51
our kids need to see
38:51
us as parents excited
38:53
to talk about him,
38:55
to share what we
38:56
know with them.
38:59
And I will tell you,
39:00
parents, if you want
39:01
to really understand
39:02
the things of God,
39:03
try to explain it to
39:05
a three or four or
39:07
five-year-old.
39:08
Try to bring it down
39:09
to their place.
39:11
Meditate on it
39:12
yourself in that way.
39:14
I hope sometimes
39:14
Aletheia Way serves
39:15
you just because you
39:16
go, oh, you said
39:18
that in the simplest
39:18
of terms.
39:19
And what a glorious
39:20
truth that is.
39:21
It's a good thing to
39:22
consider.
39:24
Okay, we give clear
39:25
expectations.
39:26
We give clear
39:27
expectations.
39:29
You have to communicate
39:31
to your children in
39:31
advance what you
39:32
expect of them.
39:34
Beloved, adults
39:35
behave this way.
39:37
Have you ever had a
39:37
job where you didn't
39:38
really know what your
39:39
boss wanted of you and
39:40
he never quite seemed
39:41
happy with you?
39:42
I've had some of those
39:43
and I hated it.
39:44
Just tell me what you
39:45
expect so I can make
39:46
you happy and go home
39:48
thinking I've done my
39:49
job at the end of the
39:51
day.
39:52
So tell your kids what
39:54
it is that you expect
39:56
of them.
39:57
And there can be
39:57
variance in that, the
39:58
expectations you have
40:00
for your kids.
40:01
Some parents are going
40:02
to want their kids to
40:03
sit perfectly still,
40:05
attentive, listening to
40:06
every word that comes
40:07
out of my mouth.
40:08
Some parents are going
40:09
to let their kids look
40:09
at books or draw or do
40:12
mazes or whatever.
40:13
That is fine.
40:14
Just let your kids know
40:16
what it is that you're
40:17
expecting of them.
40:19
Please include in that
40:21
not being distracting.
40:23
Right?
40:24
Not being distracting.
40:25
Like what we are doing
40:26
together is weighty.
40:27
The primary thing we're
40:29
doing is not helping you
40:30
train your kids.
40:31
The primary thing we're
40:33
doing is gathering
40:34
together to be equipped
40:35
for every good work.
40:37
So keep that in mind.
40:41
Alongside of your
40:41
expectations for them,
40:42
make sure they know what
40:44
can be expected when
40:45
they misbehave.
40:48
As you lay out
40:48
expectations for their
40:49
behavior, have clear
40:51
consequences for
40:53
disobedience.
40:54
This is what will happen
40:55
if you don't obey.
40:58
Be consistent with your
41:00
children by always
41:01
following through with
41:02
stated consequences.
41:04
And this absolutely gets
41:06
repetitive.
41:07
It absolutely does.
41:09
But repetition is a key
41:11
in training little ones.
41:13
So you guys all know how
41:15
I like to alliterate and
41:16
it seems like everything I
41:17
alliterate in my world
41:19
starts with a C.
41:21
This is no exception to
41:22
that.
41:24
If you ask me what our
41:25
philosophy for training our
41:26
children is, I will tell
41:27
you clear expectations,
41:30
clear consequences,
41:31
and consistency.
41:33
We absolutely have to
41:36
follow through with our
41:37
children.
41:38
So clear expectations,
41:39
clear consequences,
41:39
promises, and consistency.
41:43
Next, we are prepared.
41:45
We are prepared.
41:47
Prep your children for
41:48
coming to church, right?
41:49
Part of that is stating
41:50
expectations, right?
41:51
You can turn their minds to
41:53
what is important about the
41:54
day.
41:55
If you have older children,
41:56
you begin to talk to them
41:57
about last week's text,
41:59
what we may be preaching
42:00
about this week, although
42:01
these days, who knows what
42:03
text we'll be in.
42:04
But typically, you can look
42:06
at where we are in the
42:07
Scripture and see, with a
42:09
fair guess, what verses
42:10
will come next in our
42:11
verse-by-verse exposition.
42:14
It helps to hit the ground
42:16
running, take the kids to
42:17
the bathroom before you come
42:19
inside, have their things
42:21
ready to go.
42:23
So when we sit down and it's
42:24
time to open God's Word and
42:25
preach, you're not fumbling
42:26
through backpacks and opening
42:28
up loud containers, right?
42:31
Let me suggest to you, bags
42:36
that aren't crunchy and food
42:37
that's not crunchy and toys
42:40
that don't bang together,
42:41
like, think about things that
42:42
are quiet because it'll keep
42:43
them quiet, right?
42:44
As they're seeing, I don't
42:45
make noise with the stuff
42:47
that I'm playing with.
42:49
It'll help keep their volume
42:50
down.
42:51
But as they get louder here,
42:54
they feel a little more
42:54
justified to speak up over the
42:56
top of.
42:56
So it can be really, really
42:57
helpful to be thoughtful of
42:59
that, right?
42:59
Like a pencil bag that, right,
43:03
maybe has a quiet Ziploc thing
43:04
in its cloth rather than a
43:06
giant Ziploc bag that has to
43:09
be crunched in and out of to
43:10
get things in and out of it.
43:11
Could be an example of
43:13
something like that, right?
43:15
You don't want your kids
43:16
frantically jumping up and
43:17
down and trying to find their
43:18
stuff, right?
43:20
When we begin to sit down
43:21
together, it'll help them come
43:23
sit down, settle in for our
43:26
time, right?
43:27
You have to prepare yourself
43:31
as well.
43:33
It will be hard to fully
43:35
listen to an entire sermon
43:37
with a squirmy, noisy
43:39
toddler.
43:40
Amen, parents?
43:42
This means that you cannot
43:44
expect a Sunday morning to be
43:45
your only biblical fuel for
43:47
the week.
43:48
This is true for every single
43:49
one of us, right?
43:50
This can't be it.
43:51
You will be malnourished if
43:53
this is the only Bible you
43:55
get.
43:55
You see this morning,
43:56
you're getting very little
43:57
of it, right?
43:57
Ephesians chapter 6 and
43:59
verse 4.
44:02
So, what should we be doing
44:04
throughout the week, right?
44:05
We ought to be feeding
44:06
ourselves from the Holy
44:09
Writ every single day.
44:12
Being filled up with the
44:14
Bible will help you come
44:16
here and maybe miss the
44:18
third point from the second
44:20
point.
44:21
And you'll be okay if you do
44:23
that thing.
44:24
Go back and listen to the
44:25
recording or ladies, ask your
44:28
attentive husband what was
44:29
said there, right?
44:31
Sermons are necessary, but
44:33
they are certainly not
44:34
enough.
44:35
They're certainly not
44:36
enough.
44:38
And as you teach your
44:41
children, as you prepare your
44:42
children, right?
44:43
Keep in mind, for those of us
44:45
with young children, these are
44:46
working years and there will
44:48
come reaping years.
44:50
This is another Kathleen's
44:51
Wimke mantra.
44:52
mantra.
44:54
And if you guys know those
44:55
Wimkes, you knew how
44:56
wonderfully obedient her older
44:58
girls were.
45:00
They were just a joy to have
45:02
around because they were
45:03
really invested in as young
45:06
children.
45:07
So, keep that in mind as we're
45:08
doing the hard work of training
45:09
our kids, right?
45:11
That we are going to reap a
45:13
reward for that kind of work.
45:15
As your children grow, if they
45:18
are trained, what a blessing
45:20
it would be, what wonderful
45:21
things would be, that they
45:23
will be able to learn right
45:24
alongside of you.
45:26
And you will learn together as a
45:28
family, right?
45:28
To sit together and to hear
45:30
God's Word preached, to have
45:32
conversations about it all
45:34
afternoon, right?
45:35
Until nap time comes.
45:37
What a glorious thing that would
45:39
be.
45:40
Okay, we discipline.
45:42
Proper discipline can be a
45:43
difficult thing to navigate, but
45:45
we can be sure that it is
45:47
necessary.
45:49
Proverbs 22, 15 says that
45:50
folly is bound up in the heart
45:51
of a child, but the rod of
45:53
discipline drives it far from
45:55
him.
45:55
So, we're talking about
45:56
corrective discipline.
45:58
Later in Proverbs 29, verse 15,
46:01
the rod and reproof give
46:03
wisdom, but a child left to
46:05
himself brings shame to his
46:08
mother, right?
46:08
And the Scripture encourages
46:10
this kind of corrective
46:12
discipline.
46:15
Disciplining our children,
46:16
Voddie Bauckham writes, is
46:17
not about teaching them to
46:18
behave in a way that won't
46:19
embarrass us.
46:21
We are working towards
46:22
something much more important
46:24
than that.
46:25
We're actually raising our
46:26
children with a view toward
46:27
leading them to trust and to
46:30
follow Christ.
46:32
So, after expectations are set
46:34
and children understand them,
46:36
make sure they know the
46:37
consequences for
46:38
disobedience.
46:38
It is good practice to use
46:41
the same course of discipline
46:42
as you would at home.
46:44
Don't confuse them.
46:46
There's different standards and
46:47
consequences on Sunday than
46:50
there are other days of the
46:52
week, right?
46:53
Again, for us, we have to
46:54
remove our children to do the
46:55
same thing at home from the
46:57
room.
46:57
You probably will have to as
47:00
well.
47:01
Remember to take advantage of
47:03
that time at home when you're in
47:04
an environment where discipline
47:06
is much, much easier to
47:08
administer.
47:10
When you take your kids out of
47:11
this room, work not only to
47:14
explain what they're doing
47:15
wrong, but how it is
47:17
disobedient and why that
47:19
disobedience is not okay.
47:22
You don't want to just blindly
47:23
discipline without also
47:24
verbally correcting, helping
47:26
them to understand, even at the
47:27
very youngest age.
47:30
Young parents ask Sam and I
47:32
often, when do you start
47:34
disciplining your kids?
47:35
And we say, on the changing
47:36
table.
47:38
You have to begin setting
47:39
expectations, and our first
47:41
expectation is don't roll over.
47:44
That's it.
47:45
I'm doing a really, really,
47:47
really hard operation here.
47:50
If I'm going to not have to
47:51
take a scalding hot shower, so
47:53
don't move is the first command
47:55
we give to our kids.
47:57
And then we expect that they
47:59
will not move.
48:01
And we don't spank our
48:02
infants, but we put our hand on
48:03
their chest and pull them down
48:05
if they're starting to roll
48:06
over.
48:07
And boy, do they get it quick.
48:09
They understand, Dad is not
48:10
happy with me when I am
48:11
flipping over and smearing as I
48:14
go.
48:20
So, parents, if your children are
48:25
not keeping the standard that
48:26
you set for them, don't try to
48:29
correct, try to correct, try to
48:30
correct, try to correct.
48:31
You need to get them up and you
48:32
need to get them out.
48:34
In fact, the non-parents in the
48:35
room need to see you doing that,
48:37
not trying to pacify them, but
48:39
moving quickly with them to
48:40
administer discipline.
48:41
Like, you have not met the
48:42
standard, so we're heading out.
48:44
There will be some discipline for
48:46
not meeting the standard, and
48:47
then we'll see how we can
48:50
correct after that.
48:52
Once you've left the room, you
48:53
need to discern if it's possible
48:55
to return to the meeting room.
48:56
It may not be possible to return
48:59
to the room and be fruitful to
49:01
sit in this space.
49:03
Again, we have a training space
49:04
across the hall.
49:05
That's what that's there for.
49:07
I know we call it the overflow
49:07
room, a lot of you do.
49:09
I call it the training space,
49:10
right?
49:11
It's got a TV over there.
49:12
You can go sit as if you're
49:14
sitting in here, but there you
49:15
can be a little more corrective.
49:16
They can be a little more
49:17
distracting and help them in that
49:20
space, right?
49:21
If they learn that when they have
49:24
an outburst, they get to go do
49:25
something more fun.
49:27
You go across the hall and you
49:29
put them down.
49:30
You go put them in child care
49:31
downstairs.
49:32
Guess what they're going to do
49:33
every single Sunday, right?
49:35
With our kids, fortunately, when
49:37
both Kate and Judah, our older
49:39
ones, were young, my brother-in-law
49:42
was preaching as well, and so I
49:43
had these big blocks of time that
49:45
I wouldn't have to preach.
49:46
And so what I did in those times
49:48
to help out Sam with our
49:50
training is that if one of them,
49:51
I mean, one little outburst,
49:54
we'd give them a, you need to be
49:55
quiet.
49:56
If they didn't do it again, I was
49:57
up and out of this room, and they
49:59
would be spanked.
50:00
And then we would go into the
50:02
kitchen, because you can hear
50:04
through that little rolly door
50:05
back there, what's going on in
50:08
the room.
50:08
We didn't have a cool TV across
50:09
the hall at the time.
50:11
And I would make them put their
50:12
head down on my shoulder and be
50:14
quiet.
50:15
It's a lot less fun.
50:17
In here, they got to sit and look
50:18
at a book, right, or color.
50:20
When they weren't appropriate,
50:23
they got to do nothing.
50:25
Often they fell asleep when we did
50:27
that, right?
50:28
But it got less fun for them, and
50:30
so they really quickly said, gosh,
50:32
if I want to keep coloring, I've got
50:34
to be quiet.
50:35
And they learned to sit and to be
50:36
quiet in that way.
50:38
And so you want to figure out the
50:41
best way to move them to where you'd
50:43
like for them to be here with us in
50:46
the room, right?
50:48
Remember that training area is there
50:50
to serve you and to help you in
50:52
eventually bringing kids over here.
50:54
Don't put them down.
50:56
Make them sit in your lap in here.
50:58
Maybe they can sit in a chair out
50:59
over there.
50:59
Maybe make them sit in your lap so
51:02
it's less fun in that way.
51:05
So moms of nursing infants, you know
51:08
there's a nursing room there for you.
51:09
Certainly happy to have you use that.
51:12
So how we help you do it, let me
51:14
just run this really quickly.
51:16
We do have child care downstairs
51:17
during this time for other meetings
51:20
that we have.
51:22
We understand not all families and
51:24
visitors have children who are ready
51:26
to sit through a Sunday gathering.
51:27
Some aren't ready for it yet and are
51:29
still in the process, right?
51:30
They don't need to be put in the game
51:32
yet.
51:32
They still need to be trained at home.
51:35
So training a child takes this time
51:37
and patient sacrifice and we want to
51:40
help.
51:40
We want to be here to support you in
51:42
that.
51:43
The child care is provided with the
51:45
short-term goal of accommodating
51:48
visitors and we have had the family
51:50
that walks in and we go, hey, did you
51:51
know?
51:52
And I go, I mean, they are not prepared
51:54
at all for having their children sit with
51:57
them in the service.
51:58
What a great thing.
51:59
We have child care.
52:00
Hey, that's no problem.
52:01
We'd love for your kids to come
52:02
downstairs.
52:03
That'd be totally okay.
52:05
Okay.
52:06
So that short-term goal and for also
52:08
helping families with children in
52:10
foster care, right?
52:11
Children who are coming from being
52:14
trained differently and trying to
52:16
learn can be a very difficult thing.
52:18
So we want to serve those families
52:19
well.
52:20
But also the long-term goal of helping
52:23
new member parents who join our church
52:26
or new parents transition their kids
52:29
into sitting through worship.
52:31
And so I want to encourage you to do
52:33
that as quickly as you can.
52:35
Like really try to work your kids up
52:37
here as quickly as you can.
52:39
Work them up here.
52:41
If you wait till your child is three
52:43
years old to start training him to
52:44
sit in here, you're starting from
52:45
ground zero.
52:46
You might as well start earlier.
52:48
That'd be my encouragement to you.
52:50
I also know that we have those
52:51
particularly tough, particularly tough
52:53
days.
52:54
And it's okay if you need to take a
52:56
big deep breath and let somebody
52:58
else hold your fussy one and a half
53:00
year old while you sit and listen to
53:02
a sermon.
53:03
That's all right.
53:04
But we want to encourage you to not
53:06
take advantage of that for a long
53:07
period of time.
53:09
But find space to be working with
53:12
your kids and to be bringing them up
53:14
here with us eventually.
53:17
I talked already about Aletheia Way.
53:20
Meant to support, meant to show
53:22
children that our church loves them.
53:24
I love that you guys sing the kids
53:25
song.
53:26
That's such a good thing because it
53:27
says to the kids that you're with
53:29
them in this thing.
53:30
We're not just all gawking at you
53:32
like animals in a zoo.
53:34
But we're with you in singing these
53:36
wonderful, simple songs that we sing
53:39
with the children.
53:41
They need to feel love.
53:43
They need to feel appreciated in our
53:46
gathering together.
53:47
Not like the, we want you just off in
53:49
the corner quiet.
53:50
But please come and participate with
53:53
us.
53:53
I love hearing the kids sing when we're
53:56
singing our congregational songs
53:57
together.
53:57
That's a wonderful, wonderful thing.
54:00
And they need to feel allowed to do
54:03
that with us.
54:03
So we hope that Aletheia Way does that
54:05
and serves as an example, as I said,
54:07
for how you can do it at home.
54:09
How you can simply sit down with your
54:11
kids and do the things of God with
54:14
them in your home.
54:16
I also mentioned previously Project
54:18
Grow.
54:19
It's a program aimed at teaching
54:20
children the foundational truths of
54:22
the Christian faith.
54:23
And we're going to be using the New City
54:24
Catechism, which is a systematic
54:26
theology done in questions and answers
54:29
that the kids will memorize to, again,
54:33
come alongside to aid parents in this
54:36
work.
54:37
And then finally, encouragement.
54:40
It's really important to understand that
54:42
no family in our congregation has ever
54:44
shown up at the door with perfectly
54:46
behaved children.
54:47
There's no such thing, really.
54:49
So if you see families who are doing
54:52
it well, ask questions.
54:57
How are you doing this?
54:59
It's going to be a rare family that's
55:00
going to go, I don't know, our kids
55:01
just quiet all the time.
55:03
Had a couple of those kids.
55:05
But for the most part, a lot of training
55:08
went into helping kids sit quietly.
55:13
And there is no need to feel embarrassed
55:15
in our midst for the sake of a crying
55:17
child.
55:18
We get that it happens, right?
55:20
Those of you who are non-parents,
55:22
help parents who are like picking up a
55:24
kid that's crying and walking out of
55:25
this room by not acting like it matters.
55:28
It doesn't matter.
55:29
If you're so easily distracted, boy,
55:31
you need to work on your focus.
55:33
It's no big deal, right?
55:35
Let them get up and walk out with
55:36
every head turning as they go that way,
55:41
right?
55:41
There's no need to feel embarrassed when
55:43
the kid's having a rough day and you
55:46
have to go do some disciplinary action.
55:50
We've all gone through the training process
55:51
and we're really happy.
55:53
We rejoice to walk alongside you as you do
55:56
this thing.
55:57
And so I hope that this bit of time,
56:00
and again, I know this is abnormal.
56:01
I feel like I've got to just read something
56:03
from the Bible real quick.
56:04
This is a lot to work out of a couple of
56:08
very simple commands, right?
56:11
The responsibility of child raising is laid
56:15
on the shoulders of parents.
56:17
So we want to keep thinking about how do we
56:19
do this really well together because we
56:23
want these kids, right, to repent and believe
56:26
in the gospel of Jesus Christ.
56:28
We want to see genuine faith in our children
56:32
and we're going to have to help parents do that,
56:35
right?
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We want to come together to be intergenerational
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to aid them in the process of raising up their
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children in the fear and admonition of the Lord.
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Let's pray together.
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Let's pray together.