Latest / High n' Dry Podcast / Episode 25. The Devil Went Down to High n' Dry & Jason Voorhees vs. The Hound (Feat. Mike Salt, Author)

Transcript

Episode 25. The Devil Went Down to High n' Dry & Jason Voorhees vs. The Hound (Feat. Mike Salt, Author) · High n' Dry Podcast

• 0:15
  SPEAKER_03: Best friend talking shit to each other.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_03: So I think that this will work fine.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_03: Perfect.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: No, I think uh yeah, no, we've uh we discovered each other for a reason.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Let's go.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: So welcome to High and Dry Podcast, the only podcast where we do all our own stunts.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: Um I'm your host, Ryan Barron North, drunken philosopher.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: With me as always, James Crosslin, resident high philosopher.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: How's it going, James?
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you know, it's the end of the week.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's the end of the day.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: We usually record this in the mornings.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_01: I'm people who people who are on my Twitch stream know that I'm much brighter in the morning.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_01: This will be good.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_01: We'll bring that to the table, that sense of defeat.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: Bring this depressing energy of a draining day to the podcast.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: I like Happy Friday.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: Joining us today, we got a new guest, drunk philosopher, Mike Salt, horror author.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_03: Mike, how's it going? 'Tis fine.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, um, I literally heard nothing of what you guys said leading up to Mike.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_03: How's it going?
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_03: My internet just said, nah, this isn't important for you, but now I'm back.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_03: I got you.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_03: So I came right at the right time.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_03: You know?
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_03: Perfect timing.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, perfect.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we were just bitching about this and that, you know, the work week.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: Well, how was your work week?
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_01: Tell us what tell us five interesting things about yourself.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just kidding.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_01: Don't do that.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: Don't do that.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: We got him.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_03: Well, we're gonna start in descending order.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_03: We got this.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_03: I think that me ought to be good.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, thanks for coming on.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: We appreciate it.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we always love getting new guests, so this should be this should be pretty exciting.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and then thank you, audience.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: And if you like us, please, for the love of God, like, subscribe, send, tell your friends we're doing this, anything to get us a sponsorship, force your children to listen to it, loop it at your mother's hospice, whatever it takes.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks for listening.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: So um, for those of so for Mike and for those of you who are just joining us, this is your first time on High and Dry, this is what we're doing.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: First half of the episode, we're gonna talk about something, some mole dilemma, this or that.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: And then we're gonna devolve.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: You know, whatever.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then we're gonna devolve into a fist fight as those things often shake out.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: But before we do that, we gotta get a little drunk and we gotta get a little high.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_00: Because like I said earlier, we do all of our own stunts.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: All of this alcohol, I don't want to be doing, I do it for you, the listener.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_01: I don't want to get high ever.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_01: I just I just do it for you.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: This is just for you guys.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_01: So, James, uh, what do you what are you smoking today?
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm out of all my energy giving weeds.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: Like I smoked them all.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_01: I get I think I'm tired.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: So so now I'm stuck.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_01: I've got uh I've got oh shit, hold on.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_01: Give me a second.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_01: I got extreme OG solid.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck, I can't remember the name.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_01: It's uh extreme OG mixed with orange creamsickle.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: I like to call it Extreme Sickle.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: All right, and uh so uh Mike, you're joining us as a uh drunk philosopher.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: What are you drinking?
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_03: Uh well my wife at the very last minute heard that I'm doing this podcast because I may or may not have forgot to mention it to her.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_03: So she ran out and bought me uh a uh the Silver Moon Brewing from uh Bend, Oregon.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_03: Uh their catch and release pale ale.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um it's actually pretty good.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_03: I've never had it before.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_03: So all right, solid.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_03: You're gonna have to chug them with us.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you're gonna have to chug them.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah, I got them ready.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_03: They're ready to go.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, pre-opened over ice.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_03: We're golden.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_03: Nice.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we don't fuck around on this.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta get smashed.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: Awesome.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: And uh so this so over the past couple episodes, I've been doing a lot of peak Whitney, and I feel that I've been just cheating the audience um with that just sugar vodka.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: So this time I'm coming back with Espalon tequila.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: Um, it's just 80-proof tequila.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_03: That should get you there.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: Uh so this is gonna be a good time.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_01: The audience really shows up for his pain.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: It's not for his enjoyment, it's for his pain.
• 4:20
  unknown: Exactly.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: We want just this man I've never seen before.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: We want him to suffer.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: And I do.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_03: As we do, as Americans, we need to see this.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_03: This is our birthright.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: It lets us forget about our own suffering.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: All right, well, so it's time to get drunk and time to get high.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: So for our first host, this one's going out.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's Carl Urban, who we're still on the rocks with.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: A quick appeasing to share.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: And finally our guest, Mike Salt.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: Mike, thanks for coming on.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, thank you.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_03: Let's do this.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_01: We don't want Cher to commit a massacre against us.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_01: Please share a war crime.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: Is it enjoyable?
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: That uh that burns all the way down.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_01: Good.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_01: For those listeners out there, that's how you know it's working.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_01: Ryan is suffering.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's how you know it's work.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: See, I've been I've been uh really just going easy on myself with that Pink Whitney nonsense.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: I've been drinking like a high school.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_03: Wasn't it Schmironoff last week or something?
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um, no, I'm still wait, what was it?
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_00: No, it was some lemonade.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: It was something like that.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: It was some you know bullshit.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_03: Just got done listening to your Smokey the Bear, and I'm pretty sure it was some form of Schmeirinoff.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that would have been that would have been Smearinoff.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, you really went back there.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: I I forgot we did a smokey.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: That was a good one.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I enjoyed that one.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: All right, well, that brings us into our next toast.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: This one this week is actually going out to Blackheath, England, our newest listener over there in Blackheath.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: Uh Cheers.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: Cheers! Sounds hot.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: No salt, no nothing over here.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: It's just just tequila.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: James looking like a chimney.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that was a really big hit.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_00: Uh-oh.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: This is gonna be fun.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: So now I hope at this point, Mike, that you've finished your first ale.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_03: I'm on my second.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_03: I just finished the second.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_03: The problem is you can't.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_03: I do I'll be drinking beer and I understood the premise.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_03: So I'm like, well, clearly I won't I won't eat food today, so I'm completely I'm so hungry, and the beer will go through my system faster.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_03: So mistakes have been made because now that was too much too fast.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I'm a pretty light drinker as it is.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: I was like uh Well, I appreciate that it started with you failing to tell a significant other that you're gonna be binge drinking any minute now.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I had to kind of break it down to her that uh a uh I know that we usually share the roles as a parent, so that'll be a fun discussion.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_03: Tonight might be you carrying the weight, little mom.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_03: Not tonight.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_01: Let me do all the parenting.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna get my bow ears wrongly.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just gonna parent our children.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_03: I parent great for the first half an hour and then but that half hour, kids, kids, you better pay attention.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: All right, kids, get close.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: We gotta parent fast before this hits my blood.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: Uh so that brings us into our third toast.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_03: Mike, what's it to?
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_03: After you told me that I'd be giving my own toast, I pondered for a moment who is worthy of such toast.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_03: And the only person to my mind that comes to this kind of level of achievement would be Bigfoot.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I myself don't believe in it.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_03: I'm sure your wife and children appreciate that.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I mean, you're not gonna listen, let's be honest.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_03: But Bigfoot not, and that's what I want you to know.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_03: Support me is not.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_03: He's there for you at your time in need.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_03: You're out lost in the woods.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_03: He's leaving you clues to get back to your car.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_03: And being from Oregon, if you're not a believer in Bigfoot, he doesn't believe in you.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_03: So Bigfoot it is.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_01: Toast to Bigfoot.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_01: A religious allegory.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: This is the second toast that Bigfoot has gotten on this.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: Did you know that in Florida, Bigfoot is the skunk age?
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_01: Wait, who's we learned that from our good friend Luke Thie?
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: Of course.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yep, so Luke of Talk Far Gaming.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_00: His first time he was on, he did a toast.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_00: I have two Bigfoot tattoos.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a pretty big fan.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: You have him beat.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: I think you have a beat.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_00: Here's to Bigfoot, and here's to those tattoos.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_01: God.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_01: So you got Bigfoot being abducted.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_01: What's the other one?
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_03: I got Bigfoot being abducted, and I've got Bigfoot waving an American flag.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_03: So and this is on your body.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah, permanently.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_03: I drew them.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_03: And the artist is like, all right then.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_00: This is what you want.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: All right, all right.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: Very nice.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: Well, thank you for sharing that.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_00: See, and this is why we bring vests on.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, because that's that's not the question that you're usually going to get answered.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_01: How many Bigfoot tattoos do you have?
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: So tell me about your body.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_03: Two you're allowed to see, actually.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: The third one, my wife only, so he's got the upper half of Bigfoot, and then the legs of Bigfoot are imposed over his own legs.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: And so his dick is Bigfoot's dick.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, isn't our dick Bigfoot's dick?
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_03: Think about it.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_00: In spirit.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: In spirit.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, so there it is.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_00: We've gotten a little drunk.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: We've got a little high.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: That was a lot of tequila.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't done tequila in a while.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: That was our longest intro ever.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: We gotta get to this shit.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: Let's get down to business.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, so now, so we knew we knew we had a horror author coming on today.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: So I was thinking about some questions involving that as far as the horror is concerned.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: And uh I was just recently watching uh a couple horror films.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: Annabelle, um I was watching the Salem show, Netflix, on uh so a lot of a lot of demons were coming up, a lot of uh the devil popping up into things.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_00: What I see as a recurring thing in this is you have this hapless group of people, it's uh a family that's on the rocks or happy until this shit goes down, or you have a witch who wasn't really aware of what she was signing up for.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_00: So a dem so the question I have for you guys.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: A demon is just popped into the home.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: Your home.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_00: Um he's looking at, you know, we're we're doing the full thing.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna get possessed, you're getting um, you know, you're you're gonna have to please the devil.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: However, as like the witch stories and the other horror stories show, is that you get something in return.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_00: So the devil's taking you to Poundtown, in return, what is it that you want?
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_00: Guests first, Mike, what do you want from this demon?
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_02: Did we lose him?
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_02: Or is he just pondering?
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_02: Well, here's the problem.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, here we go.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_02: I keep losing you guys.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_02: I'd ask for a decent internet connection.
• 11:47
  unknown: God damn.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_03: Let's do this.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_03: So you said I'm getting pounded by a said devil, it happens.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and in return, I'm getting something for it.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_03: What am I getting?
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_03: Is that what the question was?
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so what are you asking for?
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you have like the historic, you know, witchcraft, and in order to start casting your spells, you're gonna have to take one for the team.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_00: So you're about to take one for the team, whether you like it or not.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_00: What are you getting in return?
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_03: I'm getting some goddamn sleep.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_03: I have four fucking kids.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_03: I have not slept.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_03: Just the ability for kids to pause.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_01: You're able to control your sleep precisely.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_03: Well, no, I have to control the kids' sleep too, because you know what?
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_03: 10 years, they have not fucking slept a full night.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_03: And I know that's a really shitty thing to ask, but I, at this point, I will murder somebody for sleep.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_03: I have not slept in so goddamn long.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_03: I legitimately, last night, because we have a four-month-old, I was up at midnight, one o'clock, three o'clock, three forty-five, three fifty-five, four o'clock, six o'clock, and then I went to work like a fucking madman.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, fuck that.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: Fuck that.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: Fuck that.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: See, that's what you gotta do what I did.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: I set up shop in someone else's life with the kid already, you know, in the time where he's sleeping.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: That's what I said.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_00: To finally get some fucking sleep.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: James, what are you getting?
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you're looking at you're looking at nights and no sleep, just getting possessed, getting worked over.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_01: Uh it's it's gonna happen no matter what, right?
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, oh yeah.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_01: So this came so this can be involuntary.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like he just fucking showed up.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: And then he's like, I'm gonna give you something, like, because I'm a fair guy.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_01: But I'm gonna do what I'm gonna do.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um that's tough.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_01: Would would total bodily control be like a be like a bad wish?
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_01: That would be so fucking cool if I had total control over every aspect of my body, if I wanted to tweak like my adrenaline or like my my brain to think a certain way.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_01: Or to be able to fall asleep.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: Or for to be able to fall asleep, or to be able to like I think I went too small.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_04: Too late.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_04: Nope.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_03: The demon's like, ha, turn around.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_03: Oh man, I got this one on a discount.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_03: Let's do this.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but to like be able to just control, I want to like Martian Manhunter it all.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_01: Like that would be so that would be that would be excellent, but I think that's too far for even a demon.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_01: He's like, this isn't a comic book.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_01: All right, yeah, but total bodily to control, to be able to like come on.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_01: That would be great.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_01: God, I wish I could there we go.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_01: I could really go for a good come right now.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_01: God think about how many interesting things you could do with that, like with just your total bodily control.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_01: That's one thing.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: That would be that would be interesting.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_01: That would be incredibly self-exploratory.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_01: And uh for some reason I'm very interested in that right now.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_03: The thing is, I've been in situations where I'm like, God, I cannot fart right now.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_03: Like I'm in an elevator and there's some people inside there that would judge me, and I just can't hold it in because whatever the scenario is, but if I had the control to be able to hold back, that would be great.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_03: So I understand your predicament.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you can evenly distribute it throughout your intestine so that it's no longer uncomfortable.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_03: I always thought it would be fun to have the ability to be a ventriloquist farter so I could fart but make it sound like somebody else's.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_03: Throw your farts.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: But will I be ranked by a demon for it?
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I just see you you let one go on an elevator and then you turn around and you finger gun them.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_00: Ah, fuck the devil.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: Goodbye.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_03: I've been through some shit.
• 15:37
  SPEAKER_00: I earned this.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I earned this.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: All right, there was a possession scene, my head twisted around, my spouse didn't know what the fuck to do.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: But now I finally sleep.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: But now I can sleep.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: So you know they're gonna be.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_01: What do I ask for now?
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_01: I got everything I wanted when this demon possessed me.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_00: You're not trapped.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not trapped here with you, you're trapped here with me.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_02: What do you want, Satan?
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, oh my god, just this.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: Um uh, but no, I I meant more in terms of he's like, wait a minute.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_01: Whoa, I never mind, I'm not gonna possess you.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_01: It's gonna be too fucked up.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: Annabelle goes fleeing from my house.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_00: Um uh but no, I like I I would uh I'd want the whole like the whole thing, like like Salem style, witchcraft, like the whole bit.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: You know, like if you want to be a classic warlock.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_01: No, I want to go all in, I want to huck fireballs and with much practice, a lot of practice, yeah, and hard to control, you know, the devil.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, and I mean, like, I understand now at this point, like I'm getting fucked.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um if we're going to go into the you know the the Western you know side of it, I'm going to hell and what whatnot.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_00: So I want as much as I can out of this.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: Classic wizard.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's pretty good choice.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_03: I've changed my answer.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_03: All right, fuck sleep.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_03: It's overrated.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_00: Well then well then, Mike, well, what do you want?
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_00: This demon, he's coming in hot.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_00: All right, and he's you you got he's got your hands on the desk, you got lipstick on.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_00: What's happening next?
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_03: I want go go gadget dick.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I want.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_03: You can pull anything out of your dick.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like my Swiss Army penis.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_03: You've seen the cartoon, and literally I could be like, Go go gadget Swiss Army knife, and then all of a sudden my dick turns into Swiss Army knife.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I want.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_03: Lock it in.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_01: Final answer.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_01: Your body is entirely composed of little metallic arms that reach out.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_01: Because that's had that had to be Inspector Gadget because there were always these metallic arms.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_01: He was made of metallic arms.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I'm gonna be really pissed off if I go to sleep tonight and the devil shows up in a ball of flame.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_03: He's like, whoosh!
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_02: Boom!
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_03: It's gonna go gadget dick.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_03: Like, no, no, no, no.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_03: I was just talking.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_03: I was just talking.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_03: Clearly, I want world peace.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_00: Well, the devil's like, I listened to high and dry exclusively, and uh, I heard you.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_03: You sold your soul for nothing.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_00: Nothing.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: But I mean, like, when it comes to like future prosthetics, I have no issue with replacing and upgrading, like, for sure.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_01: That's a whole nother episode.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_01: We can't do that right now.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_01: That's a whole nother conversation.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_01: So fans.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so fans at home, join us next week.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna talk about what upgrades do you want on your sexual organs?
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_00: So, James, final answer.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: Um, the devil's coming in hot.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: I already said my answer.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_00: You're just sticking with it?
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_01: I think that's a really good answer.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_01: I think I think my answer specifically does not because you want your witch powers because you're like, I want to throw fucking fireballs and shit, which is like really aggressive, but mine is like really self, it's really inwardly focused.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yours is very outwardly focused.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_01: You want to affect the world, but I would rather affect myself.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_01: So I think I'm I think I'm good with mine.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_01: Interesting.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_00: Well, so I'm wondering if for me, tequila is an aggressive beverage.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because I I will tell you this, man.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_00: Damn.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_00: I'm feeling the tequila.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so maybe tequila is what's causing me to fuck the devil.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: No, I think I do become a witch.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_01: I think maybe you want to outwardly affect the world.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, maybe I maybe tequila is what's allowing me to seize the opportunity.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_01: Like all people who drink tequila.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, tequila is an opportunity-seizing beverage.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and you know, but like what just what I see is like I'm fucked.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: I am absolutely fucked.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you know, because I'm gonna fuck back.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna fuck back.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: Give me witch power.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so sick of this shit.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_00: Like yesterday, I couldn't call an ambulance.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: Today, fucking Lucifer's fucking me.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: Tomorrow I'm throwing a goddamn fireball at somebody.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_03: Satan doesn't know it, but I'm a power bottom, so it's good.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, I'm about to fuck back and get mine.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's time to get mine.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: I like it.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's where we're gonna end that segment.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's time to get ours.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: So there you have it, folks, at home.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_00: I uh I don't know how you feel about that, but uh cheers.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_00: So it's time to transfer into our fist fight.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_00: We got a good fist fight for you this week, but uh for those of you wondering why I'm laughing all of a sudden, James just gave me a horrified look because he's in charge of the final toast and he has to know who the fuck's fighting.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_01: I love that he knew that that's why I was concerned.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no, every week, every every week I fucking forget who's fighting.
• 21:10
  SPEAKER_02: What well what are we doing?
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_01: God damn it.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_00: Well, luckily, he's got just a few seconds here.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because I have to say to the audience that before we get into our fist fight, we gotta get a little more drunk and we gotta get a little more high.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so Mike, we're expecting a full ale out of this right here.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_03: Ah, this is like the fourth one.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: This has been I'm on four shots of tequila, asshole.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, yeah, but I have no sleep, so is it really even yours is also a ton of liquid.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_01: You have to drink so much liquid.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, he's like drinking like four loaves of bread.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not having dinner tonight.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just gonna lie down.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_01: I I gotta let this fucking fart go, but I can't.
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_01: I wish I got total bodily control.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_01: Where's the devil when you need him?
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, boys.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: So it's time to get a little more drunk, it's time to get a little more high.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's time for one of us to take a Full ale.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_01: All right, let's do it.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_01: James, what's it too?
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_01: Oh shit, I forgot again.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_01: Hold on.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_01: So we're so we're doing doing horror uh franchise uh king Jason versus uh the Hound from Game of Thrones.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: Now we're doing the Hound from the Game of Thrones because HBO I thought we're doing the Satan.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_03: Satan is involved.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_03: No, you said we're doing the hound.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_03: So I thought I thought we're doing Satan.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_03: Whatever.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_03: It was the fall back.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's done.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_00: Satan, like he he once he's done with you, he just moves on and he finds someone else.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he's not a one-matron.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_03: I get it.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: He'll come back when he's ready.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, when he's ready.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_03: Uh oh, when I'm ready.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_01: I can throw fireballs now.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_01: I can fuck back to defense myself.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_00: You did this.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_00: So this week we we're doing the hound because HBO, and I mean this was gonna come up.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_00: HBO just put out a new trailer for fucking season eight, and I'm going why?
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_00: Why?
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_00: Fucking why.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_00: So before we get into the why of it though, cheers.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_00: Here's to the hound, and here's to Jason.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: Cheers.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_00: Oh god damn.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_02: It's so smooth.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: Let me just swallow this like a pelican.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, this really should have been the question, but season eight.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um what the fuck?
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_01: Listen, we don't need to rehash that.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone in the world agrees.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_01: There's no more commentary that could be said about it.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_00: There's really not.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_00: Well, they need the trailer, clearly, so.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I needed a new trailer.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_00: So they but the only thing I wonder was that just I mean, because normally when there's nerd rage, it's just so focused.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_00: But but I mean, but with Game of Thrones, I think what we saw there was one of the first times where nerd rage happened and it was so widely spread.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_00: It was like general.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_00: It was general population nerd rage.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: It was very bizarre.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I I think that's what was so I wonder if it was just because everyone's obsession.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_00: I have a theory though.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, go on.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_01: I have a different theory.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_01: Like your obsession theory is good, but I was listening to another podcast.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_01: Let me plug them real quick.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_01: Why?
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_01: I was listening to another podcast.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_01: And this guy was talking about how um he'll see a trailer to Wolf of Wall Street, and he'll he'll every time he'll think, maybe I was wrong, maybe it's a good movie.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: Because a good trailer will make you reconsider your appearance.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_03: South Stream 4 got me.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_03: I get that.
• 25:09
  unknown: Yeah, exactly.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_01: That's exactly right.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_01: You see a good trailer.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_01: If you can make a good trailer, people will still watch the thing again, even if they know it was shit, because that really brief thing you make is fucking awesome.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_03: I think my my theory is that break it down.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_03: Like Disney Plus has all the Marvel shit going on, Hulu has brand new releases left and right, Netflix does, who HBO, they are in between some of the bigger stuff.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they do have on the back burner, they have their spin-offs of Game of Thrones coming up.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_03: So they're hoping to throw that out there, hoping to get some interest and some traction because when they release the trailer for the prequels, it doesn't seem like it's out of left field because you're it's still in your zeitgeist.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_03: You know, nobody has watched that trailer and goes, Oh yeah, you know what?
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_03: That season wasn't that bad.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_03: But it is putting it back out there for people to pay attention.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I well, I think what it comes down to is that for some crimes, public hanging is all crazy.
• 26:11
  SPEAKER_01: It's just such a weird thing.
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_00: I don't believe that.
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_01: Tequila makes you very aggressive.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_03: Like legitimately, why didn't they have a trailer for the whole series?
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_03: Why was it just focused on the most hated thing that happened last year?
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_03: They hated they hated season eight, was it, more than they hated COVID?
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_03: Like that was that was bigger than COVID last year.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe they just wanted people talking about it.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, exactly.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_00: If you as soon as you put any sort of spotlight on season eight, you get people talking.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_01: So I mean we're talking about it now.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: Look at us go.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: Look at us go.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_03: I think or I think we need to stop talking about it because we're giving them what they want.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_00: Fuck you.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_00: Well, let's talk about a match between the hound and uh Jason.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not the only one who forgets.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_00: So, all right, so this is how it works in high and dry.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: So, for those of you who are just joining us, this is your first time, uh, welcome.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_00: But so we do this in a three-round method that guarantees an accurate depiction of what would actually happen, and it's completely undisputable.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you can't dispute it.
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_02: Binding by law.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's it's binding.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: And and the three of us at the end, when two people vote one way, the third person's opinion magically goes that way as well.
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but what we do, it's three rounds.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_00: The first round is a fight club style beatdown where the two characters have just jumped into the ring underneath a dive bar while Brad Pitt looks on.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: Um Cher up in the box office with us and Carl Urban.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_00: She's starting to scare me.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_01: And I sip the farthest away from her as possible.
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_00: Without a doubt.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: Um so she's in the front, we're in the back, and um we determine who is just gonna beat the other one to death.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_00: Round two goes into more of a city view where these characters have just received a manila envelope underneath their apartment doors.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_00: They have 24 hours, they know they have to kill the other one, they have access to everything that makes them them.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: Finally, round three is the same thing as round two, except they get to bring a friend.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: We just jumped into round one.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_00: Cher has been ushered to her seat, we're ready to begin.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_00: Round one, Jason and the Hound are stepping into the ring, they're taking off their shirt, their shoes, their belts, they have no weapons, they have nothing, they're just gonna punch each other to death.
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_00: Guests first, Mike, who do you think's gonna win?
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_03: As a horror author, I may be insanely biased here.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_03: So Jason Voorhees.
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_03: Not because he's only superhuman abilities, and the fact that he literally can die and come back numerous times, but we've seen him in the year 3000 and sp in Jason X.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_03: We know he wins this battle.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_03: Y'all can go to hell.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: Well, we don't know that the Game of Thrones is the past.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_03: It could be in a galaxy far, far away.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_03: That's some loophole bullshit if I ever heard it.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_01: It's not it's not Earth.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_00: They didn't even call it Earth on the show.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_00: Well, both of them have been transported to the 90s.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, Jason got it.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, cool.
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, in Polinox uh angsty, what is he?
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_00: He's gen.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_00: What's the gen that was forgotten in between Boomer and X?
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_00: You forgot them.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_00: In Polinox Gen X, where they're fighting in a bar, um, not realizing that they're basically at the peak of humanity.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so I mean, timing.
• 29:33
  SPEAKER_03: The hound just sits there and he's like, the fuck?
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_03: And Jason X is like, oh yeah, I I know exactly what's happening here.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_03: Slashity slash, fuck you, the hound.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_03: However, no weapons, snappity snap it in the neck, you're dead, the hound.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, in Jason and Manhattan, we saw him just punch that dude's head off.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_00: Well, um, so James, what are your thoughts?
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_01: He did punch a guy's head off.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_01: That is a good point.
• 29:59
  SPEAKER_01: I think that oh god, I think the hound would fight super fucking dirty, first off.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_01: The hound is a the a dirty, dirty fighter.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_01: More dirty than Jason, arguably.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_01: Arguably he is more dirty because he's because he's human.
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you know, he's not some vengeful spirit.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_01: He's a human and he chooses to do those things.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_01: He chooses to be that way to other living things, which you have to respect to some degree.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_01: And fear.
• 30:31
  unknown: Yeah.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_00: No, and and Cher will tell us that I know what he's talking about.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_01: Just a propensity for ultraviolence.
• 30:42
  SPEAKER_00: Well, we know where Cher's voting.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so for me, um, so I'm looking at the two of them come in, and I think that Jason definitely has the edge here.
• 30:53
  SPEAKER_00: And and I the last time the hound just met someone like Jason, it was his brother, and I mean, but he wound up taking out the mountain.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_00: But he did the other swords, right?
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_00: Eventually they were dropped, and the hound was just getting his head beaten against bricks for like 20 minutes.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_01: And then the mountain got crushed by a rock, right?
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I'm well, okay, so then I guess the question I have is what's the structural stability of this bar?
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_01: Not great.
• 31:21
  SPEAKER_01: Not great.
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_01: They have to stay in the basement.
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_00: So I mean, if it's not great, a support beam will collapse into Jason.
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_03: Um Jason wins.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_03: He just he walks away from that shit.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_03: You know what?
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_03: Actually, what's perfect about this is the hound is terrified of fire, if I recall.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_03: And Jason's terrified of water, so it's kind of like, you know, yin and yang.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_03: You just turn this into a Pokemon battle.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_03: The hound used water, it is effective.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um, interesting.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_00: Well, so I mean, if that's being the case, I mean, I the basement is more leaky than it is on fire.
• 32:03
  SPEAKER_04: Jason just anymore.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_00: Well, Brad Pitt would spark one up.
• 32:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, he'd have he'd have a cigarette for sure.
• 32:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and so they're both freaked out.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_03: Jason catches on fire in every movie and every goddamn Jason movie, Friday 13th.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_03: He's on fire at some point.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_03: So I feel like he just catches on fire eventually and he just runs over the hound.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_00: One of Brad Pitt's like butts hits him and he lights on fire.
• 32:31
  SPEAKER_00: The hound freaks out.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I think Jason's superhuman strength just kind of wins it for him this time.
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_00: Well, so then let's bring it, um, let's bring it back to Mike.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_00: Mike, final thoughts and can we get a vote?
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_00: The hound sucks.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_03: Jason wins.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_01: James, final thoughts and a vote.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_01: I think Jason, he punched a guy's head off.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_01: He did that.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_01: He punched a guy's head off.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_01: He did that thing.
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_03: That's a thing he did.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_03: It's on record.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_00: That is a thing he did.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know what to say.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, I mean, and and the hound did have issues with uh 13-year-old, you know, who just stabbed him a bunch of times.
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I don't think it matters when his head could get punched off.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_00: When his head could get punched off.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_00: Well, does he understand that his head could get punched off?
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think he has a choice.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_00: So round one goes to Jason as he punches their round's head off.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_00: My boy.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_01: It's just as anticlimactic as the eighth season.
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_01: As both the eighth season and the Jason in Manhattan.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_00: So, folks at home, get ready for that shit a lot.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_00: There's gonna be a lot of we're gonna do a lot of digs.
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of digs on that.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: So, anyway, that brings us into round two.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_00: So, both of these characters have just received a manila envelope slid beneath their apartment doors.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_01: Jason looks at a place, mask, looking at the smoking note.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_00: Oh.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_00: He's got no idea what the fuck's even going on.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_00: But somehow he knows.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_00: He's gotta go kill the hound.
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_00: Meanwhile, the hound has just received his manila envelope, and the technology behind manila envelopes is well in his mind.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_03: He also has to have a door to slip it under, so yeah, yeah.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_03: I don't deal with wizardry.
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_00: Look, I could I could lick it and it's it it adheres to each other.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_00: So after Jason learns how to read, and after the hound figures out this technology behind blue, the two of them have entered into the city where it's a whole nother movie about them learning the fucking city.
• 34:54
  SPEAKER_02: That's Jason and Red.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_02: I want to watch that movie.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_03: I want to watch the movie where both Jason and the Hound are both learning the year 2021.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_03: And then at the very end they meet and they're like, dude, this shit's fucked.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_03: Alright.
• 35:10
  SPEAKER_00: The first time Jason speaks is the fuck?
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_01: Why would their world be like this?
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_00: Well, so what I imagine happens is so where we're gonna set this then as close as we can to an environment they're both familiar with.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_00: It's out in the fucking woods.
• 35:26
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 35:26
  SPEAKER_00: Jason wandered away from Camp Crystal Lake, and the hound is just in the woods.
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_00: That's where he lives.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_00: You know, he's in between jobs at the moment.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: And they they get their manila envelopes, and they're like, alright, I gotta go kill this other guy.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_00: Let's get down to business.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: So, guests first, Mike, who's gonna take it?
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_03: Are we talking Jason X?
• 35:50
  SPEAKER_03: That's the only question that actually hinges on this, right?
• 35:53
  SPEAKER_03: If he has Jason X capabilities to prepare for this, he wins, right?
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_01: He has I don't think we have Jason X.
• 36:01
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I I think I think what well, I think at least what what the people at home are looking for is Jason as we know him.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, Jason as we know him.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_01: We had we had to disqualify um Ripley when she was uh when she was an alien hybrid.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_01: You don't get to be a hybrid, you have to be the thing you are.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_03: Well then you give the hound enough time, you give him his body armor, his squad.
• 36:27
  SPEAKER_03: And see, thing is hor the hound also has good sword fighting abilities, and I Jason doesn't even have good machete abilities.
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_03: He's just really strong.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_03: So, like he's yeah, he just killed somebody in the scooping bag once.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_03: So I I mean, I love Jason, he's my third favorite 80s horror icon, but I mean, I think the hound wins this one, and it's kind of bullshit, but you've given him preparation, so the hound wins.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_01: Alright, well, respectable opinion.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_01: Um, James, thoughts.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_01: I think even without preparation, the hound wipes the floor with your third favorite.
• 37:08
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck your favorite.
• 37:11
  SPEAKER_02: Offense! So much offense!
• 37:15
  SPEAKER_01: So, so I do think the hound takes this.
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_01: The hound has like a great sword, and like he like like Mike said, Jason doesn't even fucking know how to use a machete.
• 37:25
  SPEAKER_01: He stabs so many people with a machete when it would be so much easier to hack them.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_01: God damn it, it's a hacking weapon.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_01: You don't even know how to use your hacking weapon.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
• 37:39
  SPEAKER_00: Childs are dumb.
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_03: I can count for this having four.
• 37:46
  SPEAKER_00: Well, then for me, um, so I would say so.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_00: Jason is used to killing people like I am now.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm four shots deep of tequila.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_00: I've been swearing all day.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_00: Jason doesn't like that.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_00: I I have I have a fornicated there's there's premarital sex um on my record.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so wait.
• 38:11
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, here's the question.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_01: Does the hound fuck?
• 38:13
  SPEAKER_03: Not really, right?
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_01: No, he's done with that.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, he's he's done with fucking.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I was thinking.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_01: I was trying to think of this.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, if if if if if the hound fucked, Jason would fucking take it.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_01: Jason would take it because he kills people.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, Jason would love to take down that Tyron Lannister, whatever his name is.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_03: Like, yeah.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_03: But the hound.
• 38:32
  SPEAKER_01: He's like, just hurrying through the air.
• 38:38
  SPEAKER_01: Where's Tyrion Lannister?
• 38:40
  SPEAKER_01: Release Jason, he'll find him.
• 38:43
  SPEAKER_00: Well, so what but but I mean, I but I think so.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_00: Jason is gonna come after the hound and he's gonna bring the machete down, but the hound isn't ladened by tequila and premarital sex.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_00: Probably tequila for sure.
• 38:56
  SPEAKER_00: But he's just gonna sidestep and slice Jason's head off.
• 38:59
  SPEAKER_00: That's exactly what's gonna happen.
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like, you know, aside from a head slicing off, though, I mean he's pretty indestructible.
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_03: Like legitimately.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_03: He would totally slice his head off.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, he has a hockey mask, so but I think I don't think the hound would even have the story time to recognize that Jason was anything different.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you would have just even killed in the same amount of time he killed anybody else.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_03: You just kill him, be like, well, that was weird.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, he dressed very oddly.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_00: All right, well, I think then we know what's going on here.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_03: So Hound loses significance.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_03: Got it.
• 39:41
  SPEAKER_03: Moving on.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_00: The Hound is gonna take round two, which brings us into round three.
• 39:49
  SPEAKER_00: So now we have the same style thing, except this time they each get to bring a friend.
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_00: And well, uh, guests first, you get to figure that shit out.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_00: What do you think's gonna happen?
• 39:59
  SPEAKER_01: I love that we put this on the guest.
• 40:02
  SPEAKER_03: Well, this is rude.
• 40:03
  SPEAKER_03: Um okay, so in this scenario, Jason has already fought Freddie Krueger, I assume, right?
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I I I can give him that.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_03: And you end Jason versus Freddie, Freddie vs.
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_03: Jason, whatever the fuck the name of that movie is, because I've drank so many fucking beers, and this is your guys' fault, and I got parenting to do later.
• 40:26
  SPEAKER_03: No, you don't.
• 40:27
  SPEAKER_03: No, you don't.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_03: Anyways, you end them with Freddie winking at the camera.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_03: So one would assume they've settled their differences and they're like, hey, let's go kill some bitches together, right?
• 40:37
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, and that's interesting.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_03: Freddie is Jason's partner in this one because Freddy literally has nobody else to choose from.
• 40:44
  SPEAKER_03: So interesting.
• 40:48
  SPEAKER_01: They're burn victims, they'll get along.
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_00: I was getting ready to say that he brought his mom.
• 40:52
  SPEAKER_00: And like she just gets her head taken up.
• 40:55
  SPEAKER_01: I was gonna say I was gonna say his mom also.
• 40:57
  SPEAKER_01: Damn.
• 40:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so you could take his mom.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, it makes sense, but when it comes down to it, I want Jason to win, and Freddie makes the most choice.
• 41:05
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't care who you you can put the mountain next to the hound, you put Freddie in the same arena, the two teams gonna win.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_03: That's just I'm sorry.
• 41:13
  SPEAKER_00: All right, all right, good thoughts, good thoughts.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_00: That's why I'm bringing a guest on because I was gonna say it was gonna be Jason and a woman who's collecting retirement pensions.
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_03: Someone who legitimately did not want to do the movie, yeah, was dragged into it and just kicked and screamed the entire time.
• 41:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so but now we have another horror icon.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_00: Interesting.
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_00: James, what are your thoughts?
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I I was gonna now that you've said Freddy from that, I remember a mad TV sketch.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_01: Do you remember Freddie versus Jason versus Snuggles?
• 41:52
  SPEAKER_02: No, but I'm totally checking that out next.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_01: I do not.
• 41:58
  SPEAKER_02: Saved for later.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_01: It was really, it was a really quick sketch, but now Snuggles is in the Freddie versus Jason.
• 42:07
  SPEAKER_01: Put him in there.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_02: Well, what do you think happens?
• 42:13
  SPEAKER_01: I think I think Snuggles makes it so intensely soft that the hound is at peace.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_01: The hound and whoever he's uh whoever he's with are at peace.
• 42:26
  SPEAKER_01: It doesn't matter who the hound brings.
• 42:30
  SPEAKER_01: Snuggles will make you fall into the silkiest linen you've ever felt in your life.
• 42:38
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds fair.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_00: And and I could see how that's an asset in a combat scenario.
• 42:45
  SPEAKER_00: I was going to say, personally, me, so I'm definitely going with Freddie.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_00: I I can't come up with a better idea than Freddy.
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_00: But I was going to say that the hound is going to bring Aya.
• 42:57
  SPEAKER_00: Aria.
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_00: Aria.
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_03: Or twist, I mean, hear me out, I'm sorry for interjecting, but if Freddie's bringing along his arch nemesis, why the fuck isn't the hound bringing the mountain?
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_03: Because I don't think the hound would want to.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, like his brother.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I get that.
• 43:18
  SPEAKER_03: But it's it's a survival of the fittest at this point.
• 43:20
  SPEAKER_03: He needs the best there.
• 43:23
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah.
• 43:27
  SPEAKER_01: Why do you say Tyrion?
• 43:28
  SPEAKER_01: Tyrion is a fucking strategic genius.
• 43:33
  SPEAKER_01: And he's a scapegoat.
• 43:36
  unknown: Sure.
• 43:36
  SPEAKER_00: So Tyrion's gonna die, but well no, he's not.
• 43:40
  SPEAKER_01: No, he may he doesn't.
• 43:42
  SPEAKER_01: He doesn't ever, he always gets out of it.
• 43:47
  SPEAKER_00: Interesting.
• 43:48
  SPEAKER_00: Well, well, for me, what I was so for just I think Freddie and Jason are gonna come up, they're gonna be rushing fucking the Hound and Aya, say or Arya.
• 44:03
  SPEAKER_00: I've heard both.
• 44:04
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know anymore.
• 44:05
  SPEAKER_03: So much tequila on your system.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_00: Macy Williams.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_00: Is that her name?
• 44:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 44:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 44:13
  SPEAKER_00: Um she'll Appear out of nowhere as the savior and the only chance they ever had for season eight and kill them both.
• 44:24
  SPEAKER_03: You think so?
• 44:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 44:25
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, she's a virgin, right?
• 44:27
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, that's pretty sure how the show works, right?
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 44:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I I never heard her say.
• 44:32
  SPEAKER_03: I think she wins.
• 44:33
  SPEAKER_03: This is some bullshit.
• 44:35
  SPEAKER_01: I don't like this.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_01: Well, um well she she does kill a supernatural be a immensely powerful supernatural being.
• 44:44
  SPEAKER_00: She literally sidesteps what should have been a three-episode battle.
• 44:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 44:49
  SPEAKER_00: And and stabs the main bad guy.
• 44:52
  SPEAKER_00: That's what rogues do.
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like I'm personally, I think the Night King could have killed Jason.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_00: And she just comes out of nowhere and k'a.
• 45:01
  SPEAKER_00: That's my thought, at least.
• 45:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and I I think she might have a thematic victory on her hands there.
• 45:08
  SPEAKER_00: Um, Mike, let's get your final thoughts and then let's get a vote.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_03: Well, this is some garbage.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_03: But I feel like your stupid argument may have clinched the win, but I'm still voting my boy Jason because I would feel like I betrayed everything I love about horror if I didn't.
• 45:28
  SPEAKER_03: He can't be beat by a 13-year-old girl.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_03: That's not how the world works.
• 45:33
  SPEAKER_01: Freddie's really powerful though.
• 45:35
  SPEAKER_01: Freddy's so powerful.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_00: But the well, I mean, I would say just the thing with that, with Freddie, is you know, he tries He doesn't beat the last girl, though.
• 45:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, Freddie doesn't beat the last girl.
• 45:46
  SPEAKER_00: He doesn't, and Rio doesn't have to be a bigger one.
• 45:48
  SPEAKER_00: Neither of them beat the last girl.
• 45:51
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I would even say Jason doesn't either, because you had the new one with um the supernatural's younger brother.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_00: And the the final girl, for some reason, Jason just kept in the basement so she could survive.
• 46:05
  SPEAKER_00: Specifically, so she could survive.
• 46:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, she has to survive.
• 46:09
  SPEAKER_01: Well, James.
• 46:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think that I think that Arya wins because of that.
• 46:15
  SPEAKER_01: I think the hound may die.
• 46:17
  SPEAKER_01: I think that the hound may die.
• 46:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, probably.
• 46:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I think that the some more of Arya's family is gonna die.
• 46:26
  SPEAKER_01: That a lot of Arya's family's gonna die.
• 46:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 46:29
  SPEAKER_00: But uh and we're just gonna totally forget about all that cool stuff we had set up for her.
• 46:35
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 46:35
  SPEAKER_00: But she'll survive.
• 46:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, she's gonna live some garbage.
• 46:41
  SPEAKER_00: Well, well, I like uh so for me, I I think what we went from thematically, um, as far as our Martin is concerned, was we had a story where anyone could die turned into a thing where the last girl is gonna do everything.
• 46:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and you know what?
• 46:58
  SPEAKER_01: Aria's been on this show before.
• 47:00
  SPEAKER_01: Aria versus uh Ezio and lost to Ezio, but she beat Jason because of theme.
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_01: Because it's thematic.
• 47:09
  SPEAKER_01: It was thematic.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_03: I'm raging, I'm raging in the garage.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's happening right now.
• 47:14
  SPEAKER_01: You know, sometimes that happens.
• 47:16
  SPEAKER_01: We've had some real upsets when it when it comes to theme at the end.
• 47:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 47:19
  SPEAKER_00: No, I mean it's specifically with Gritty.
• 47:21
  SPEAKER_03: I mean here's the thing with Freddie, right?
• 47:23
  SPEAKER_03: Like, he's in your dreams.
• 47:24
  SPEAKER_03: Like, God dang it.
• 47:26
  SPEAKER_03: Like, there's always a final girl.
• 47:27
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, even in episode in Freddie uh Elm Street 2, there's a final boy.
• 47:31
  SPEAKER_03: So, I mean, if you look at a hound as a little boy, because he's kind of a pussy, I mean, whatever.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_03: Final child.
• 47:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, so I think I think uh the hound is gonna bring someone who is your average slasher horror monster's weakness, the final girl.
• 47:51
  SPEAKER_03: God, I hate that you're right.
• 47:53
  SPEAKER_03: I'm actually really annoyed that you're right, and I regret every I regret the Instagram message.
• 47:58
  SPEAKER_03: I shouldn't even pose it.
• 48:01
  SPEAKER_03: I should have never said yes to this asshole.
• 48:04
  SPEAKER_03: I regret the Instagram post I did, I regret everything.
• 48:08
  SPEAKER_03: Any of my followers are listening to this?
• 48:10
  SPEAKER_03: Unsubscribe!
• 48:12
  SPEAKER_01: We don't need this in our life.
• 48:14
  SPEAKER_01: Move on.
• 48:15
  SPEAKER_01: We bring people here to destroy their favorite things.
• 48:19
  SPEAKER_03: Look, some hot garbage.
• 48:23
  SPEAKER_00: And and that's that that's what you come to the high-end drive for.
• 48:26
  SPEAKER_00: Um you'll notice we didn't ask him damn about his writing, but we did take the We did kill one of his favorite things.
• 48:34
  SPEAKER_01: My third favorite, and this is some garbage.
• 48:37
  SPEAKER_00: We took his favorite things and just smashed them.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, so uh yeah, if you're a fan of anything, we'll bring the creator on and we'll just podcast is rude and I don't appreciate it.
• 48:51
  SPEAKER_00: Well, luckily, on high and dry, our opinions morph to form one.
• 48:57
  SPEAKER_01: And your opinion the whole time has been that the hound will take this.
• 49:02
  SPEAKER_01: That's the rule.
• 49:04
  SPEAKER_03: I have a different opinion.
• 49:07
  SPEAKER_03: Perfect.
• 49:08
  SPEAKER_03: That's that's how we do it.
• 49:11
  SPEAKER_00: All right, so now that we all agree, the Hound wins two to three.
• 49:16
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, what?
• 49:17
  SPEAKER_00: Two to one.
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_00: Two to one.
• 49:20
  SPEAKER_00: Where am I?
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_00: The Hound wins two to one.
• 49:23
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I I have some rough feelings about it too, just because of season eight.
• 49:27
  SPEAKER_00: I I he it's he season eight isn't his fault.
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_03: It's not the hound's fault.
• 49:33
  SPEAKER_03: I'm inclined to blame him at this point.
• 49:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, there's enough alcohol coursing through my veins that it's anybody's fault but Jason's.
• 49:39
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, well, I think what we need to do is we need to send some fan mail to RR and figure out what the hell happened there.
• 49:46
  SPEAKER_01: We need to ask him.
• 49:47
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 49:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 49:49
  SPEAKER_01: I think he's probably tired of those questions.
• 49:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, he's like, I wish I never wrote these books.
• 49:55
  SPEAKER_01: I hope, I hope, I hope I die before I put it out.
• 49:58
  unknown: Fuck you.
• 49:59
  SPEAKER_00: His final spite.
• 50:02
  SPEAKER_00: On his tombstone, it just says, Arya breaks her neck on a log.
• 50:09
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, so there you have it, folks, at home.
• 50:12
  SPEAKER_00: The hound will overtake Jason.
• 50:15
  SPEAKER_00: It was a tough one, but though that's that's how it is.
• 50:18
  SPEAKER_00: We're looking at Cher now, and she's she's nodding.
• 50:21
  SPEAKER_03: So uh Cher, you can go to hell.
• 50:23
  SPEAKER_03: Oh boy.
• 50:24
  SPEAKER_00: You don't know what you've invited.
• 50:29
  SPEAKER_03: You have kids, man.
• 50:30
  SPEAKER_01: You don't know what you're doing.
• 50:32
  SPEAKER_03: I also have a wife.
• 50:33
  SPEAKER_03: She can raise them.
• 50:33
  SPEAKER_03: We're good.
• 50:34
  SPEAKER_02: Please, Cher.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_02: Take care.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_02: Come on, Cher.
• 50:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, Cher, don't please.
• 50:38
  SPEAKER_00: He knows not what he does.
• 50:42
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 50:42
  SPEAKER_00: Well, there you have it.
• 50:43
  SPEAKER_00: Mike, thanks for coming on.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_00: We really do appreciate you coming on here.
• 50:47
  SPEAKER_00: We had we had a great time with you.
• 50:49
  SPEAKER_00: You jumped right in.
• 50:49
  SPEAKER_00: I had a fun time.
• 50:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_01: Where can we find you if we want to get more of your work?
• 50:55
  SPEAKER_03: I have a website which I poorly manage, mike saltauthor.com.
• 51:00
  SPEAKER_03: What was that?
• 51:01
  SPEAKER_03: MikeSaltauthor.com.
• 51:04
  SPEAKER_03: If you go there, it will be about six months outdated.
• 51:07
  SPEAKER_03: So go to my Instagram, Mike underscore salt.
• 51:11
  SPEAKER_03: Fantastic.
• 51:12
  SPEAKER_03: Um on Twitter and on Facebook, because Mike underscore salt has been taken.
• 51:17
  SPEAKER_03: I am Mike SaltMoose.
• 51:20
  SPEAKER_03: All one word.
• 51:21
  SPEAKER_03: It's garbage.
• 51:22
  SPEAKER_03: I don't use either of those accounts.
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_03: Follow me on Instagram.
• 51:26
  SPEAKER_03: Follow the man on Instagram.
• 51:28
  SPEAKER_01: You can find him there, but don't.
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_00: Go to Instagram.
• 51:33
  SPEAKER_00: Awesome.
• 51:33
  SPEAKER_00: Well, thanks again.
• 51:36
  SPEAKER_01: James, where can you find us?
• 51:38
  SPEAKER_01: You can find us at high and dry pod on Twitter.
• 51:40
  SPEAKER_01: You can find us at high and dry podcast on Instagram.
• 51:45
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, you can find uh Ryan at Ryan.
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sorry.
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, at Ryan Barron North.com.
• 51:52
  SPEAKER_01: And then also on Twitter at Barron underscore north.
• 51:56
  SPEAKER_01: You can find me, James Crosslin, on Twitter at the Dabolical.
• 52:01
  SPEAKER_01: I have a Twitch stream three days a week where I teach people full stack JavaScript.
• 52:06
  SPEAKER_01: Come by with your code.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_01: Let's talk.
• 52:08
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I'm same handle on Twitch, the Dabolical.
• 52:11
  SPEAKER_00: Fantastic.
• 52:12
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why I make him do it.
• 52:13
  SPEAKER_00: I'm four shots in it, Tequila.
• 52:14
  SPEAKER_00: There's no way I'd remember that.
• 52:17
  SPEAKER_00: Mike, thanks again.
• 52:19
  SPEAKER_00: We'll see you all next week.
• 52:21
  SPEAKER_00: We come out, same time, 5 p.m.
• 52:23
  SPEAKER_00: No, yeah, 5 p.m.
• 52:24
  SPEAKER_00: Sundays.
• 52:25
  SPEAKER_00: Tell people about us.
• 52:26
  SPEAKER_00: Please tell people about us.
• 52:28
  SPEAKER_03: Listen, I'm gonna go ahead and go out.
• 52:31
  SPEAKER_03: Lie to your friends.
• 52:32
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 52:32
  SPEAKER_03: Tell them if you have a health, like a health nut friend, someone likes jogging, be like, dude, you like jogging?
• 52:39
  SPEAKER_03: Check out these guys high and dry.
• 52:41
  SPEAKER_03: They love jogging.
• 52:44
  SPEAKER_03: You have a friend that loves American Top Model, boom, dude.
• 52:47
  SPEAKER_03: Check these guys out high and dry.
• 52:49
  SPEAKER_03: They love America Top Model.
• 52:51
  SPEAKER_03: I actually didn't have an America's Next Top model on here.
• 52:53
  SPEAKER_01: Did you know that that we actually had a contestant from America's Next Top Model?
• 52:57
  SPEAKER_03: No, I really did not.
• 52:58
  SPEAKER_03: That's awesome.
• 52:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we did.
• 52:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we totally did.
• 53:01
  SPEAKER_03: My daughter just started watching it, so that's why it's in my head.
• 53:04
  SPEAKER_00: Oh well, tell your daughters hey, they got Heather K from America's Next Top Model on here.
• 53:09
  SPEAKER_00: She doesn't sleep.
• 53:10
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure she already knows.
• 53:11
  SPEAKER_01: Heather Kuzmick, cycle nine.
• 53:16
  SPEAKER_00: Look us up.
• 53:17
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you guys so much for listening.
• 53:18
  SPEAKER_00: Take it easy.