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Stress and neutralizing its effects · Good Morning From The Chicken Coop!

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  Welcome to the good morning from the chicken coop, podcast with
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  Kim Johnson, your creative strategist and master mindset.
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  Coach filled with inspiration, distinctions, perspectives and
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  possibilities. We help you to cultivate a
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  mindset that leads you to create the best version of yourself.
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  You could ever imagine join Kim. Every morning from one of her.
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  Favorite happy places her chicken coop, along with all her
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  chickens. Hey everybody.
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  Good morning from the chicken coop.
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  Another one in our series of stress, we are talking about
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  understanding the meaning, you assigned to things, which we've
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  talked about in other podcast before, but this one is in
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  relation to stress. So how we tend to look at things
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  and how we make things mean, more than they actually mean, or
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  because we are in a state of stress, we basically will make
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  it become something bigger, where a tiny little trivial.
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  Incident or something very, very small and insignificant.
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  All of a sudden, turns into a giant issue, making mountains
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  out of molehills, we've all heard our parents, say this to
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  us or our grandparents, say this to us, and when we do that, it's
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  it's very hard to shift our perspective, because we've
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  already assigned it a meaning of something that's a very big
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  deal. And then here we are trying to,
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  you know, navigate something that's huge so where it becomes
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  such a big, you know, challenge for us is Stopping that process
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  before it starts. So, looking for those hooks
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  seeing how you define things around, you is a major piece of
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  breaking, the pattern of stress and breaking down the pattern of
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  stress. So if you are consistently
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  finding that you are, you know, in a state of stress and you're
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  monitoring how it shows up in your body and you're monitoring
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  the triggers of it. And you're looking for All these
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  places and you're saying okay well these are all the stories
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  I'm assigning it. This is just another piece of
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  information to help you say. Okay, if I'm assigning it, this
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  story, what's another perspective?
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  What's another story? I can assign this, and I'm not
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  saying that you're going to turn your horrible perspectives into
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  great perspectives. I'm not saying that, but I'm
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  looking at you and saying, hmm, maybe you can find another way
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  to make it mean something, not quite as bad as you've assigned
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  it to me. So Observing and saying, did
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  this person have this intent? Was the intent that they took
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  what the intent? I think they meant nine times
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  out of ten. It's not nine times out of ten.
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  We will realize that they did not do something the way, you
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  know, we thought they initially did it, they were doing
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  something just to, you know, appease themselves.
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  They were doing something to quote, unquote help themselves,
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  but it wasn't me. We as Sinister as we have made
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  it out to be and that comes all back to, you know, your mindset,
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  your perspective of the world. So how do you start this
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  rewiring process to break the stress pattern?
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  Well, the first thing is you've got to stop saying I'm stressed
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  about this situation. I'm stressed about that
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  situation. This stresses me out, just those
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  very words, manifest and put energy into something that you
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  really I really don't want to have happen.
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  So in order to change a perspective, you have to change
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  your language patterns. First of all you have to change
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  your physical patterns and you have to change your perspective
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  but a lot of times you can do this very quickly by changing
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  your language patterns and the meaning you assign two things
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  right away if I'm in a stressful situation and I'm are quoting
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  that I'm going to first of all, say okay what's the reason this
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  is causing me so so much stress. I make Sure.
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  I use a what frame on it so that my brain can actually answer.
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  What is stressing me out about this?
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  Well, because I know and it can be simple situations.
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  Like I'll give you a great example, go shopping.
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  And I go to Costco and I buy a bunch of stuff and I come home
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  and then I have to unpack everything and put it away.
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  Now, I'll be honest with you, I don't want anybody else doing
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  that job. I want to do it myself because I
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  like to put things away where I like to put things away and have
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  it organized rotated through the stuff.
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  If I very much enjoy the process of organizing, it gives me a lot
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  of certainty and any of you who listen regularly know that I'm a
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  certainty freak, and I like it. If my husband goes in and he
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  starts the process of putting things away, immediately, that
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  is a stress factor for me because I won't know it.
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  Did he rotate things? Did he put them where I would
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  have put them? Where did this go?
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  How did this happen? My brain starts to just overload
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  and it legitimately is a stress moment.
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  Now, he's not doing it to be anything other than helpful.
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  He's trying to be helpful and me responding this way is asinine
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  and I know it. So I have to stop myself and I
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  have to pull myself back from the edge and I say nope this is
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  not going to stress me out. I am not going to allow myself
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  to have this response. Instead I'm going to put myself
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  on the path of being appreciative of him.
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  Helping I'm going to say to myself right now.
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  I appreciate the fact that he's helped.
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  I appreciate the fact that He's done it this way.
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  I appreciate the fact that he's poured effort into our home into
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  us into caring for us. And this response I'm having is
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  unwarranted. It's over the top, I'm going to
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  change the language pattern as soon as I start to change the
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  language pattern, I can feel myself come down to three
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  notches and the stress starts to level off.
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  When I change the meaning, then I can say even further.
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  Okay, now I'm going to pause and I'm just going to take a deep
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  breath and I'm just going to relax.
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  I'm just going to pause and relax for a second.
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  I can go in, I can look it over and if I need to move anything
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  to make myself, happy I can do that.
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  But this is not about something that is cause life or death in
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  this amount of stress. So I have to pause and pull
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  myself back. It's always that same little
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  thing that we taught in the bus book.
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  Stop pause. You know, you have to, you have
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  to stop. You have to reflect on where you
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  are. You have to hit that pause
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  button and you have to choose, and you have to redirect
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  yourself. You have to consistently stick
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  to the turn. So today, your mission is to go
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  about that and see how can you reframe it.
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  How can you change that? And neutralizing that stress
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  response in your head and in your language?
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  Because that's going to make all the difference in the world.
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  Okay guys. I will see you tomorrow and
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  we'll talk about some more stress, relieving items.
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  I hope you have a fantastic day and I will see you then.
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  Bye.