Latest / The Treehouse Show Podcast / Betrayed By Your B-Hole | Thursday 02.05.26

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Betrayed By Your B-Hole | Thursday 02.05.26 · The Treehouse Show Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Want more Treehouse, check out our YouTube exclusive shows at
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: YouTube dot com. Slash at Treehouse on air.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: It is time to leave your worries outside and laugh
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: with us inside the Treehouse. I'm Dan ol Malley along
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: with Trey Trenholm, Raj Sharma and Jerry Caldwell. I'll tell
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: you right now.
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: That if it was.
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: Hang on, how do I want to phrase this? Let's
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: try this approach. I never felt the pull into government
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: work or to do anything political in life as a career,
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: but if the United States had its own ministry of sex,
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: I think that might have changed my mind as a
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: young person. Armenia is on the cutting edge of things,
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: although it may not necessarily be in.
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: A good way.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: Armenia could be set to establish a ministry of sex
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: to ensure there are no unsatisfied women in the country.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: This is under proposals floated by a newly formed opposition party.
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: Do they get arrested for faking it?
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: Look, there's lots of questions here, There's lots of policy
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: debates to be had.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Uh, this is part of the Hey, this guy's one
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: of his reasons is so there are less unsatisfied women
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: in Armenia.
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: It is a big goal.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: Now, Now why he wants more women to be satisfied
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: is a whole nother story.
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, whenever men do something and I cannot stress the
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: enough ladies other dudes somewhere in between. If you're ever
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: wondering why a man is doing something, ask him.
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: He'll probably tell you.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: And also, don't just guess, like if a guy's doing
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: something in his mind he has a reason for it.
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: Really usually Yeah, I think that's just you, you speaking
• 2:29
  Speaker 3: on your behalf. Really, when you guys do something, you
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: don't have a reason for it, Uh, not always? Uh?
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: Or are we talking about just in general or sexually
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: in general?
• 2:45
  Speaker 4: I mean sexually as well.
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: Just man, I don't think you always have to have
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: a reason to do something. You can always regret. That's
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: why regrets are there. You didn't have the reasoning to
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: see past the fact that you're gonna regret doing this.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but I guarantee you the reason you did the
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: thing that you now regret, you had a reason for
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: doing it in the first place.
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: Might not have been a good reason, but a reason
• 3:12
  Speaker 3: nonetheless anyway, Okay, that's that's better, not a good reason, right.
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: That's why it's very specific a reason a reason.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, gott say a good one, just a reason, kind
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: of like what's happening in Armenia. Armenia could be set
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: to establish a ministry of sex to ensure that there
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: are no unsatisfied women in the country, under proposals floated
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: by a newly formed opposition party. Good luck going against
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: that policy.
• 3:43
  Speaker 4: Now, is this minister going to be female?
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: Oh no, that's silly talking, Jerry.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: The eyebrow raising idea was proposed by Sargist Corruptian, a
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: senior figure in the Strong Armenia Party. This is ahead
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: of parliamentary elections due to take place this summer. Mister
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: Correptian suggested that sexual dissatisfaction among women was fueling increased
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: political activism, particularly among middle aged white women, a claim
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: that has already sparked at least a little bit of
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: backlash online and Yes it gets better. Asked whether a
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: government body should be created to address this issue, Correptian
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: said it should, adding that such a Ministry of Sex
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: could also play a role in tackling Armenia's declining birth rate.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: The idea of a dedicated ministry was initially raised by
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: an Armenian sociologists who claimed on this particular podcast that
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: women had become more politically active because of sexual dissatisfaction.
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: And the guy who hosted this conversation went first that
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: by suggesting a specific government department be established to oversee
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: the issue, and then mister Correptian said it should be
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: called the Ministry of Sex. And you know what, I
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: have to hand it to them. This is a bold
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: new take. I mean, not only do these guys think
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: feminism is bad, but they seem to think that the
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: cure for it is to from real good.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: But listen, don't don't poo poo this, because that's part
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: of the bill Armenia. Listen, they they can do something
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: special here because when they open this they they can
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: bring on their native children, the Kardashians and bring them home.
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: I hadn't thought about this. Yes, please God make this happen.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: And if you've never been to Armenia, it's beautiful. All
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: you have to do is go to Glendale, California. That's
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: where they all are. So there's no there's no low
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: birth rate. They just keep moving to Glendale. You know,
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: Drey brings up a very very solid point. I mean,
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: if even if, even if you don't agree with this
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: policy on a political level. If if you are anti Kardashian,
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: this is a good thing. This makes it very difficult
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: to vote against. I mean, well, I just don't know
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: if they'll have enough room for their asses.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: But listen, because that this could take on its own life.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: I mean, they can inspire the women of Armenia because
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: they can then learn how to fuck for money.
• 6:46
  Speaker 3: I think they've already got that locked down. That's what
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: he's getting at Raj.
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: What happens is Armenia can bring the Kardashians home, and
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: then their Kardashians can bring their wealth and influence and
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: what they're really good at, like trade.
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: Just said, two of the Armenian people.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: And whoever is the top Armenian athlete, they can ruin them.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: Mm hmm, I am I see it right now. I
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: am really irritated with Kim Kardashian because I I my
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: one sport, my one athlete that I lived is now
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: ruined because she's dating Lewis Hamilton and it's absolutely pissing
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: me off. Now I have to have a I by
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: one sport that I love, my f one Sundays because
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: it's it's it doesn't have all the American bs except
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: for the couple of races they have here.
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: Let's tray. Let's be honest. Here, it's a sport called
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: F one.
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  Speaker 2: It was only a matter of time that the Kardashians
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: showed up at it.
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: It's more of a shock that they didn't start there.
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: If it was called black one, they'd all be there,
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: that's right.
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: Uh, if it was F one black.
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: But if they go to Armenia and you talk about
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  Speaker 3: the top athlete, I don't think there's a lot of
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: black athletes in Armenia, and you don't want them to
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: fly out ray J a Uhlan.
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: Anything, right, you know what, Armenia.
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: Armenia might take a hit when it comes to medals
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  Speaker 2: in the Olympics because the Kardashians will ruin all their athletes,
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: but the birth rate will go up, so goal achieved.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: I mean twenty years later, they're doing a Devil Worst
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Product sequel. If you could have a Kim and ray
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: j a sequel, I think it's been about twenty years.
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: And if you're if you have a ministry of sex
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  Speaker 2: in the country of Armenia, that would then be in
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: the classrooms. It's Kim and ray J part two, and
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: that's the video everyone watches when it's a substitute teacher,
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: that's their PSA.
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  Speaker 3: That's what.
• 8:56
  Speaker 5: And if you're saying, if you're not sexually satisfied, that
• 8:59
  Speaker 5: you're into political activism, I understand that.
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: That's why I think Hillary Clinton keeps running. It's also
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: much she'll never stop.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: That's Bill's secret. He withhold just to keep her out
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: of the house.
• 9:26
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• 12:21
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• 13:01
  Speaker 3: Check that out today.
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: All right, Trey, you mentioned this to me the other
• 13:07
  Speaker 2: day and I was immediately fascinated.
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: So here we need to discuss this. The floor is yours.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: So it's the worst place to have a blowout, and
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about I didn't think I was a internal
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: blowout on the toilet.
• 13:32
  Speaker 3: Blowout, got it? Okay? That helps, all right, nop, If
• 13:35
  Speaker 3: I understand you had to blow out on the toilet.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: And I found the worst place.
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: To have one where.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: A hospital bathroom. And here's why.
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: Well, okay, go ahead.
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: So I I go and see my mother every days.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: And one day I was in there and I felt
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: a gurgling and I had to get to the bathroom.
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: And when I and it's what. This was one of
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: those where it's a lot of a lot of air,
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: it's loud, and you'll quickly figure out that a hospital
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: bathroom obviously has They have no soft surfaces, so acoustically
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: it is as an echo chamber. So when you really
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: let one go a symphony of sound, and it doesn't
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: there's no masking it or anything else. It reverberates everywhere.
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: I am quite sure the nurses station one hundred feet
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: down heard even through a closed door, what was going
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: on for sure?
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: And then you have to walk out and walk past.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: The Huh no, I mean this is even it is
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: in a private room. But it's like, I can't blame
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: it on my mother. She you know, she's there dying
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: and hadn't eaten in days. So it's just and they
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: have no no fans or air fresheners, so it's it's
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: just it's a double whammy.
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: Uh No, No, you would think with a private room
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: out of hospitals, need at least get a little fan
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: or some spray, right.
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, little I saw come on, But no, so there's gone.
• 15:28
  Speaker 3: And m hm. So you hadn't used that restroom there before?
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: I had used it, but not I hadn't had a
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: blowout in there.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: You didn't have a Jeff Daniels moment from dumb and
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: dumber in the correct Yeah. So there are so many
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: levels to this, because when Trey mentioned this the other day,
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: he's like, I found the worst place to get a blowout.
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: My first thought was, I don't think there's a bad
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: spot to get one of those. And it's it's like, oh, yeah,
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: he said blow out, and then I went to the
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: next spot of blowout. I thought he meant a horrible
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: place to have a blown out tire.
• 16:07
  Speaker 4: So imagine my.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: Surprise now that you basically just did your worst number
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: two next to your dying mother in the hospital and
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: everyone on the floor in the hospital heard it, because
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: hospital bathrooms know nothing of privacy.
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and the lady that brings in, you know, the
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: meals was in there when I walked out. I don't
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: know how long she had been there. She was just
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: putting the trade down. I'm hoping she had just walked in,
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: but she could have been there.
• 16:37
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 16:40
  Speaker 4: TikTok right now, Yeah you could.
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: I would like to think that's when she picked up
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: the little communicator device that's attached to the hospital beds
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: and keyed it up to the nurses station and say,
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: for listen to this, and she holds it.
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: Up to the bathroom door as you were just going off.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's one of those where I mean it sounded
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: like I had a balloon up my ass. I mean,
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: it was just.
• 17:03
  Speaker 5: I hope that's when she put the tray down and
• 17:06
  Speaker 5: then realized it his Mexican food and took it back
• 17:08
  Speaker 5: and then just brought a sandwich.
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: It goes back down to the cooks and the cafeterias
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: might need to inspect this. Something seems a little off here.
• 17:23
  Speaker 5: I'm surprised that the proctologists didn't come in and be like,
• 17:26
  Speaker 5: we need to talk.
• 17:30
  Speaker 4: Buddy.
• 17:30
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: If this wasn't in a hospice unit, I probably they
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: probably would have, you know, had some kind of announcement
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: that there's a code going on in room six.
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: And code brown, code brown, which in a hospice facility.
• 17:49
  Speaker 3: I don't know that that could be good.
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: It could be bad because on one hand, they they're
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: not they're not necessarily thinking it's a visitor. They might
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: be thinking it's one of the patients. So on one hand,
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: it sounds horrific, like, oh gods, I mu's gonna have
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: to go in there and clean that up. On the other,
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: if it's a patient, doing that signs of life.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: If they had heard me, they would have thought, oh,
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: room six is about to be empty. Yeah for another one.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: No one could possibly survive then, No, that's what death
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: sounds like on one.
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: Tray.
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: So, actually, Trey, because of that, you should have when
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: you walked out, you should have been proud, hands out like, yes,
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: not only was that me, but I have survived all
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: that you have heard.
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: I would have. I would have come out pants down,
• 18:40
  Speaker 3: like that's where this came from, will help. I would
• 18:51
  Speaker 3: have proudly showed off the the vehicle from which it came, vessel,
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: vessel from which it came.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: I createst triumph of it all was that I didn't
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: shit myself because it was close.
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: We've all had those moments, Yeah, where you get the
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: gurgle ras you're shaking your head. No, you've never had
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: the blowout moment where you it's kind of like.
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: Pants like, I've never done that.
• 19:18
  Speaker 4: It's kind of like we were mentioning F one racing earlier.
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: It's like you go from zero to one hundred in
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: a matter of seconds, Like you feel one little bubble
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: turn a certain direction and you go from being totally
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: fine to oh my god, if I don't find a bathroom,
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: it's going to be real ugly and here real fast.
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: That's never happened to you.
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: But but this is one of those. Not only it was,
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: I'm guessing everyone's had this moment where you can't get
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: your pants down fast enough and you were worried from
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: standing to sitting if you're gonna make it rfl so
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: you're going to have a blowout, you know on the
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: back of the bathroom wall are all over the toilet.
• 19:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, Nope, never, not one time. Is that because you maybe.
• 20:09
  Speaker 4: Welcome it's coming.
• 20:13
  Speaker 3: We we eat a lot of lentils. I don't know
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: if that just because for for me.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: The last time I had one of those I told
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: you guys about it was a couple of years ago
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: or last year, I can't remember which. It was after
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: eating a lot of Indian food in about within an hour,
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: h I was, I was doing some unseen things in
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: a Cole's bathroom.
• 20:35
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, that's right. That's when you had to Did
• 20:37
  Speaker 3: you have to buy shorts? Is that we said you
• 20:39
  Speaker 3: had to do? You had to buy Yeah?
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: So, like like Trey's talking about, not only did you
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: know your your your your your speed ducking duck walking
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: like your pigeon toes in and you're trying to go
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: as fast as you can, which physiologically is impossible because
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: your toes are now tucked in, but they have to
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: be to keep your your be hole closed.
• 20:59
  Speaker 3: Try to make it to the bathroom.
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: Then you get there, and we all know this happens,
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: and science has proven it. The closer you get to
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: the bathroom, the more difficult it is for your body
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: to hold it in. So once you do get too
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: near the toilet and you start pulling off, you know,
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: your pants and stuff, that's the.
• 21:17
  Speaker 3: Most dangerous time. And in that instance, I wasn't fast enough.
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: My body was just ahead of me.
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: So yeah, it.
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: Is.
• 21:29
  Speaker 8: You get into the bathroom and your brain registers okay,
• 21:31
  Speaker 8: we're in here now, We're in here now. But yet
• 21:34
  Speaker 8: from the neck down it's like, no, we're not ready. Wait,
• 21:37
  Speaker 8: they don't send that signal fast enough. It's the ultimate battle,
• 21:40
  Speaker 8: man versus body. It's not man versus machine, it's man
• 21:43
  Speaker 8: versus his own body. Can he control it long enough
• 21:47
  Speaker 8: so as not to poop his own pants? And in
• 21:49
  Speaker 8: most cases you will win. But it only takes once.
• 21:54
  Speaker 8: It only takes one loss, and you will never be
• 21:58
  Speaker 8: the same. So rise, I would like to point out, yeah,
• 22:01
  Speaker 8: inside the treehouse, inside the treehouse. Right now, three out
• 22:04
  Speaker 8: of four men, this has happened to.
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: You've pooped yourself. Oh yes, and not as an infant.
• 22:14
  Speaker 4: Correct, as a full grown man?
• 22:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah, not too long.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: The worst is if you're driving and you know you
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: just you have that, you have that fart and you
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: know you're you let it rip, and it's like, yeah,
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: your body betrayed you. And then and then you are
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: you are stuck. You know, you're houring all your life choices.
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: You can't even walk through a BUCkies. No, you're already
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: in a seated position. Man, you're like halfway there. As
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: far as your buddy is concerned.
• 22:47
  Speaker 5: Ah, what do you do? What's the what's the protocol? Well,
• 22:53
  Speaker 5: you know what's Hopefully you're not with somebody, hopefully, I mean.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: I thank god never been with any one. But uh,
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: well it just depends. Uh sometimes you need depends.
• 23:04
  Speaker 3: That's well, that's the problem. You know.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: Sometimes it's just it's it's a little a little squirt
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: and you realize that you can you can still make
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: it to the bathroom because it's just just a little bit, uh.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: A little bit, yeah, and then sometimes it's a lot.
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: I drive, I drive my car off the bridge. They're
• 23:34
  Speaker 3: gonna they're gonna go.
• 23:35
  Speaker 5: Well, that's why you should himself he died. Not No,
• 23:39
  Speaker 5: A little bit sounds gross. A lot Okay, maybe you're sick, well.
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, look, you're a little bit sick or
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: a lot sick. That's really what it boils down to.
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: But I am absolutely fascinated Raj that this has not
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: happened to you, because I feel like this is something
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: that not just happens to every man at some point,
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: it happens to women too, and don't and don't let
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: them tell you otherwise.
• 24:09
  Speaker 4: To me, this is one of the rights of passage.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: No one talks about as an adult because there's all
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: these things that happen when you're a kid or you're
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: going through puberty and then some early adult stuff, but
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: peak adult, like in your prime, when you poop yourself.
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: That's something that not people that that's something people don't
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: talk about, but it happens, and it happens very frequently,
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: and it happens to both sexes, so it's not just
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: limited to us gross guys.
• 24:40
  Speaker 3: And so I'm surprised it hasn't happened to you.
• 24:43
  Speaker 4: But it will.
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure it won't. I thought to it at
• 24:48
  Speaker 3: one point.
• 24:49
  Speaker 5: I'm at fifty right now and it hasn't happened. So
• 24:53
  Speaker 5: but if it does, I will be the first to
• 24:55
  Speaker 5: tell you. Guys, good, I'll be part of the club.
• 24:58
  Speaker 5: That's right, It's I had an exclusive club.
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: There's lots of us, there's just only so many of
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: us that actually speak on it.
• 25:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah. And also, my girlfriend doesn't poop, so that's good.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: Congratulations. I feel like that needs to be the title
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: of your relationship book.
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: That's the name of my next special. My girlfriend doesn't poop.
• 25:24
  Speaker 4: It's the most beautiful thing ever.
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: She doesn't. She's sweet and kind and doesn't make foul noises.
• 25:30
  Speaker 3: She doesn't make foul sense. She's just, I mean, she's perfect.
• 25:34
  Speaker 3: So it is an angel. It sounds like that's she
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: would think so, but no, but I think I jinxed myself.
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: So let's see what happens.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: Eh, it'll happen. I have no doubt it will happen.
• 25:47
  Speaker 5: I mean maybe when i'm luck you you know, if
• 25:50
  Speaker 5: I make it to my seventies. Sure, I mean, I
• 25:52
  Speaker 5: wouldn't I wouldn't be surprised if that happened then, but
• 25:56
  Speaker 5: I've made it to fifty years of not pooping myself
• 26:00
  Speaker 5: outside of being a toddler.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: Your be hole is the Judas of body parts. It
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: will betray you.
• 26:06
  Speaker 3: Yes, it will. It's the hero of the story by
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: the way.
• 26:12
  Speaker 2: Of yours maybe, but as Trey said, it's the Judas
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: of all of ours. I will say this though, as
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: an adult, when you accidentally poop yourself, it does build character.
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: You learn a lot about yourself in that moment because
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: you have to get real good, real fast about thinking.
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: What am I going to do now?
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: There will never be a moment in your life where
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: you will be more present, isn't that something people talk
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: about a lot these days. Quit lamenting the past, Stop
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: thinking so much about the future that hasn't happened it.
• 26:45
  Speaker 3: You need to be more present. You need to be
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: more in the moment.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: You will never be more in the moment than when
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: you poop yourself, and that's when you will find who
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: you are.
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: Shitting yourself gives you critical thinking.
• 26:59
  Speaker 8: It takes everything outside of that focus and just pushes
• 27:03
  Speaker 8: it to the side and narrows it like a laser.
• 27:07
  Speaker 8: Because you got an issue and you got to deal
• 27:10
  Speaker 8: with it.
• 27:11
  Speaker 4: I mean, well, it's already the.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: Problem, but it also turns you into mcguiver and and
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: how you're going to get out of this issue?
• 27:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think. I don't think a paper clip
• 27:21
  Speaker 3: and gum will help. But you don't know that you
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: say that, but it absolutely will.
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: You'll be looking around that bathroom and the calls going like,
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: I would kill for a freaking paper clip, right, where's
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: Clippy when you need him?
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: Pops up?
• 27:35
  Speaker 4: Did you shit yourself?
• 27:37
  Speaker 3: Did you just walk out of the coals pantiless and
• 27:40
  Speaker 3: buy shorts? And nobody said anything because they're like, we know.
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: No, but that's but again, that's what happens to Jerry's right.
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: So when you poop yourself, yes, in a public environment.
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: I don't mean like in front of everybody, but I
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: mean like when you go to the bathroom Robert bathroom
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: kind of thing a store. It's going to take everything
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: you have ever learned, everything you have ever known, everything
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: you have ever read, and you were going to have
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: to apply all of these lessons in this moment on
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: how to navigate the next five minutes, ten minutes, twenty minutes,
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: whatever it is to get yourself out of this shitty situation.
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: One is do I need new pants? Am I in
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: a place to get them? Can I clean this up?
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: How am I in this bathroom alone? Are there other people?
• 28:26
  Speaker 2: Is this the mixed use bathroom? What are some creative
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: ways I can go about getting myself out of this situation?
• 28:31
  Speaker 2: Where are some practical ways? Every possible synapse in your
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: brain will be firing trying to figure out.
• 28:40
  Speaker 3: A way out of this crappy situation. I would shit
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: on the floor and not a judge in the world
• 28:46
  Speaker 3: would convict you. You told this story like, hey, it
• 28:50
  Speaker 3: was about to be my pants or the floor, and
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: be like, you know what, case dismissed.
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: And you know what, if you had enough wherewithal to
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: go about that way, to have that strategy, then I
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: would applaud you. However, when you are in a when
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: you were in the throes of war with your own butthole,
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: and an idea will not will not come to you
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: because your only thought is get my ass over the toilet.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Well, roj, you're you're the fallacy of your of your
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: thought process. There is that you have a choice. You
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: have no choice, your your your butthole will betray you,
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: and then it's dealing with the aftermath.
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: Mm hmm. Step one, there's that it's happening like bubbly gut.
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: Sometimes it's just you know, just letting off you just
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: you know you're in the car. You just lean over
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: just a little, a little. You think it's just gonna
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: be a little tooted, and then you feel it and
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: you're like, oh no, and then thus it begins.
• 29:56
  Speaker 3: And then your uber drivers like get out your and
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: you're paying the fee times too. Well, I'm glad I
• 30:05
  Speaker 3: made it to fifty without having to deal with what
• 30:07
  Speaker 3: you guys had to deal with.
• 30:09
  Speaker 4: I almost feel like that deserves a party or something.
• 30:13
  Speaker 5: I'll see guys at Chuck E Cheese or an Indian
• 30:16
  Speaker 5: restaurant for Dan.
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's sort of like a keen Siniera for
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: your colon.
• 30:22
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I'll pack that. It's when you turns fifty
• 30:32
  Speaker 3: blows out on you, shove.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: A candle up your ass for a plug.
• 30:38
  Speaker 3: But I'm gonna look great in that dress.
• 30:42
  Speaker 6: The Treehouse Business online at Treehouse on air dot com.
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: Do you feel restless and anxious, feel like something's missing
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: in your life? Maybe you just need a little more
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: Treehouse in it. Go to patreon dot com slash Treehouse
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: on Air and check out all the bonus features. A
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: subscription offers including bonus shows, behind the scenes content, special
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: subscriber only live shows, and so much more. That's Patreon
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: dot com slash Treehouse on Air. That's p a t
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: r e o in dot com slash Treehouse on Air.
• 31:16
  Speaker 6: You're in the treehouse. Visit us online at Treehouse on
• 31:21
  Speaker 6: Air dot com.
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: All right, speaking of needing to go to the bathroom,
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: Avengers dooms Day, which is the next Avengers installment out
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: of Marvel that comes out at the end of this year.
• 31:38
  Speaker 3: Already we have the.
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: Rumor mill flying Avengers dooms Day. The new rumor is
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: that it has a run time of three hours and
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: forty five minutes.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: Yes, that's that's where I poop my pants.
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that'll be my doomsday. When Avengers Endgame came out,
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: we knew it was it was like just a hair
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: over three hours, right, Jerry, We knew it was a
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: hair over three hours. Marvel warned us, and they didn't
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: give us an intermission on that. I feel like they
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: need to give an intermission on Avengers Doomsday, especially if
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: it truly is pushing the four hour mark, that's two
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: hold movies. Please God bring back the intermission. Otherwise I
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: can't enjoy the movie theater experience as much.
• 32:34
  Speaker 5: Well, I grew up on Bollywood movies that are all
• 32:36
  Speaker 5: over three and a half hours.
• 32:37
  Speaker 3: OK, so we always had an intermission in the theater.
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: I mean yeah, but even when you got like the
• 32:45
  Speaker 3: VHS or the DVD, it'll show up it'll just say
• 32:48
  Speaker 3: like there'll be a climax in one of the scenes
• 32:51
  Speaker 3: and it'll just say intermission, so you could actually hit
• 32:53
  Speaker 3: pause and go do what you need to do. So
• 32:56
  Speaker 3: I'm used to that. I think, I'm American audiences are
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: not used to having an intermission anymore.
• 33:04
  Speaker 8: They used to have special like let's go out to
• 33:08
  Speaker 8: the lobby, you know who had like some special ditties
• 33:11
  Speaker 8: and ship that would signify it was time to go out.
• 33:14
  Speaker 3: And yeah, I thought that was before the movie, before
• 33:17
  Speaker 3: the previews. You had both.
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: I mean you had the previous stuff that would come
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: out before and then you had you know, the concessions ads.
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: But yeah, in older movies and in some theaters, they
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: would throw in the occasional intermission because they were there
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: their standard in the theater, right, so not main movie theater,
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: I mean theaters like in general theatrical productions, intermissions are standard.
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: Fair.
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it's it's an exception in a in a
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: theater setting. In a theatrical setting, you might get a
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: one act play that's not going to have an intermission.
• 33:48
  Speaker 4: That's weird.
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: But in the movies it's now no intermissions ever. But
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: if Avengers dooms Day is truly going to be over
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: three and a half hours pushing a four hour run time,
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: by God, please give us, please give us an intermission,
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: because when Avengers Endgame came out, it was just over
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: three hours. And I planned because I knew I did
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: not want to leave the theater at all during that movie,
• 34:11
  Speaker 2: so I planned ahead and made sure I was properly
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: dehydrated before the movie so I wouldn't need to.
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: Pee in the middle.
• 34:18
  Speaker 4: Of Double Void right before pace yourself on the drink.
• 34:25
  Speaker 3: Which I'm getting lots of popcorn.
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, you would think as much as theaters struggle,
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: they would want to have an intermission to give people
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: a break to go raid the concession stand come back.
• 34:42
  Speaker 8: Yeah, that's what the Little did It used to be about.
• 34:45
  Speaker 8: Let's go out to the lobby and get ourselves a treat,
• 34:48
  Speaker 8: and it would have like the little dancing candy bar,
• 34:51
  Speaker 8: the popcorn, and that really.
• 34:53
  Speaker 2: Especially if you spent like the first part of the
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: movie eating popcorn, then you have your inn a mission.
• 34:57
  Speaker 4: Then you can go get some candy to night.
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: You got your dessert for the second half of the film.
• 35:03
  Speaker 5: Yeah, my ex always wanted to share popcorn, and I'm
• 35:08
  Speaker 5: like Joey on Friends, I don't share food.
• 35:13
  Speaker 3: I'll buy you your own. But well, and she would
• 35:17
  Speaker 3: always reach over and I would move it like, no,
• 35:21
  Speaker 3: go go out there. Well, I don't want to miss
• 35:23
  Speaker 3: any movie. Well, then you should have got this at
• 35:25
  Speaker 3: the beginning. But I understand. I thought that was a
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: dancing hot dog that was at the beginning of the
• 35:31
  Speaker 3: Let's go out to the Lobby. I thought that was
• 35:33
  Speaker 3: the beginning of the movie. I didn't realize there was
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: an intermission. I was maybe too young to realize, yeah,
• 35:37
  Speaker 3: that was going on.
• 35:38
  Speaker 5: But like The Ten Commandments, my dad loved that movie
• 35:42
  Speaker 5: and we went and watched it. They released it in
• 35:44
  Speaker 5: the theater on Easter, and that's a four hour movie.
• 35:49
  Speaker 5: And I don't think there was an intermission. I think
• 35:52
  Speaker 5: there was nap time for.
• 35:53
  Speaker 3: Raj, but you may have slept through the intermission.
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: Because the one movie that I remember going to that
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: had an intermission was in eighth grade. It was a
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: field trip to the movie theater at the Glenn Lakes
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: off of seventy five and Walnut Hill.
• 36:12
  Speaker 3: Was the movie Gettysburg.
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: Four and a half hour film, Wow Star Packed. It's
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: a wonderful film based on based on the book. Four
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: and a half hour movie had an intermission.
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: Good.
• 36:26
  Speaker 4: Last one I remember was Titanic.
• 36:30
  Speaker 5: I saw that in the theater and I didn't get
• 36:32
  Speaker 5: we didn't have an intermission.
• 36:34
  Speaker 8: Maybe yeah, and.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: That's a movie that probably should have one. But like
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: going back to Avengers End Game with just over three hours,
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: I knew people that didn't plan ahead like I did,
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: Like I dehydrated myself so I wouldn't go I wouldn't
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: need to go to the bathroom, so I was comfortable
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: through the entire film. But there were people that didn't
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: do that, and they didn't want to miss anything, so
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: they held it, and they held it so long and
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: so hard.
• 36:58
  Speaker 3: People left the theater with with urinary tract infections.
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: Raise your hand, Jerry, I thought you were one of them. Yeah, Okay, anyway,
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: people did leave the theater they had they had UTIs
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: because they had held their bladders so long during an
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: end game. So that's definitely gonna happen with Doomsday. If
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: it's even longer, Please God give us an intermission. Yes, well,
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: I mean I've been stuck in traffic in India, so
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: we know how to hold it.
• 37:31
  Speaker 3: To shay. Yeah. And the UTA in India is just
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: a college that everybody's trying to get into.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: And we started this episode talking about sex, so I
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: feel it's fitting for us to end it talking about sex.
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: A Florida Airbnb host has been accused of walking around
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: the Disney resort naked and engaging in sex acts with
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: a vacuum cleaner.
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: Yes, or as they called in Florida Tuesday, Yeah.
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: The Florida Airbnb host accused of walking around the resort
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: outside of Disney World naked and engaging in a sex
• 38:13
  Speaker 2: act with a vacuum cleaner. Kevin Dale Westerhold allegedly exposed
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: himself in front of properties and was seen naked in
• 38:21
  Speaker 2: hallways at the Windsor Hills Resort in Kissing Me, Florida.
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: That's according to ring footage reviewed by Asciola County Police
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: and a very surprised ring camera owner and a.
• 38:35
  Speaker 3: Very surprised vacuum.
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: That's where you invest into Dyson and you get that
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: cyclonic stuff going.
• 38:45
  Speaker 3: Oh man, that's not a job for a hoover.
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: From the makers of Floby, stick it and get it.
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: I've never understood the allure of sex ax with a
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: vacuum cleaner, but I'm also not a Florida man, so
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: go figure.
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: I just want to see what he does with the attachments.
• 39:16
  Speaker 2: Maybe he could be the one to finally show us
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: what to do with the brush.
• 39:22
  Speaker 4: I still don't know that.
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: For all things Treehouse Treehouse on air dot com from
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: your favorite listening platform, Share the show with a friend.
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: Hit that chare button.
• 39:32
  Speaker 4: That's one with the square in the arrow coming up
• 39:34
  Speaker 4: the top of it.
• 39:36
  Speaker 3: Shared the show with a friend today and together, let's
• 39:38
  Speaker 3: grow the Treehouse show. We'll see you next time right
• 39:41
  Speaker 3: here inside the Treehouse