Latest / Serious Beef Podcast / Big and Busy

Transcript

Big and Busy · Serious Beef Podcast

0:00
I'm Abby and I'm Anna. And this is serious beef.
0:03
Welcome, welcome. Welcome.
0:05
You just went to you looked at me and you said you ready?
0:07
And I said yes. And you said OK, here we go.
0:10
And I assume you pressed a button.
0:12
I don't know. Abby runs the laptop.
0:13
I don't. And I clicked my pen.
0:17
That's why there's a countdown. I was like, oh, that picked up
0:22
the clicking and she's going to be mad at.
0:24
Me, because I said I was ready when indeed I was not.
0:28
OK, what's the beef? I have the beef.
0:31
You have the beef. What's the?
0:33
Beef, she says to herself, where's the beef?
0:35
The beef, My beef this week is Dad and I went to get a it was
0:42
just him and I yesterday, home yesterday evening because your
0:44
girls were all out and about. We'll talk about that.
0:47
And so we're trying to decide what we want to do for dinner.
0:49
He had been cleaning in the garage, which is great.
0:51
I had been doing laundry. We were tired and we were just
0:53
like, no effort. We're putting no effort into
0:55
this, right? And so he's like, why don't I
0:58
just run to Subway and get a couple sandwiches?
0:59
I'm like soap, whatever. He comes back, we're eating and
1:02
I experienced the we Googled what's called, it's called.
1:08
You say exactly, exactly. 5 seconds of Googling the AI
1:11
overview said it's called the Sandwich Sport.
1:14
The sandwich sport. I'm eating my sandwich, which I
1:17
like knowing the flatbread. I really like the flatbread, but
1:19
I'm eating it and the whole everything's coming out the back
1:22
end. It's just like everything's I
1:25
guess sporting out of the bag and I'm trying to stick it back
1:31
in sandwich, which doesn't sound good and I'm now covered in Mayo
1:37
and just, you know, it's just a mess.
1:39
So there's my beef. Like, come on, come on,
1:41
sandwiches do better. Indeed.
1:44
I don't want the sport. I don't want the sport either.
1:46
I don't know if you saw my face that I panicked a little bit
1:49
because I realized that I did not in fact look up a sauce.
1:53
So I look at you. So I was panic panic looking up
1:56
a sauce while you were explaining the sandwich.
1:57
I didn't even know. I just worry about myself.
1:59
That's OK. I don't think about anybody.
2:01
It's terribly annoying. Because it's like one, I've
2:03
ruined my shirt. It is potentially it is.
2:06
I've got now. My sauce is everywhere now.
2:08
It's not on my fucking face. It's all over my hands.
2:10
It's all over my face. I'm Betsy.
2:11
It's everywhere. I'm like just trying to eat a
2:13
sandwich on flatbread and I look like I've throw it up in the air
2:17
and, you know, let it land where she went.
2:19
To cloud college legit it's all over her face.
2:22
I'm like what is what is happening?
2:24
This is not that difficult. Not to mention the price of
2:27
Subway. That might be a minor, that
2:28
might be even more of a major beef because like 1/6 inch sub.
2:33
Yeah, mine on flatbread was like $8.
2:36
Remember the $5 footlong? No, no more.
2:38
I know. No more.
2:40
No more listeners. Yeah.
2:41
Wayne got your dad got a six inch, the sub of the day, which
2:45
is like spicy Italian or whatever, that was $5.
2:49
Yeah, Yeah. And a six inch, 6 inch, not a $5
2:51
footlong, not a $5. Footlong RIP the $5 no.
2:54
More RIP is right because you're going to have to go to the
2:57
you're going to have to go to the bank and take out a small
3:00
loan. Does it get a sandwich or
3:01
something? God bless we.
3:03
Didn't know how good we had it. No, we didn't.
3:05
No, we didn't. Well, Speaking of sandwiches.
3:08
And yeah, and the mess all getting on your shirt.
3:10
What's the sauce? Our sauce is Dijon.
3:12
Mustard. I think we already had that one.
3:14
No, but just search it Legit. Legit.
3:17
OK. Well, I'll be damn, I almost
3:19
said Dijon ketchup, but that is just from the song.
3:22
If I had $1,000,000, it's true, but we could make it a sauce if
3:25
we want. Well, maybe we're another
3:27
charge. We're in charge.
3:28
Maybe another day, because today's is Dijon mustard.
3:30
When I was a kid. Oh no, is grey Poupon mustard
3:35
Dijon mustard? I just had a thought.
3:40
'Cause I remember. These Grey Poupon mustard
3:44
commercials, Grey Poupon is thank you.
3:46
OK, I thought it was. And these two dudes, very
3:48
wealthy dudes, kind of come to a stop and they're Rolls Royces or
3:52
limos or whatever they're in. And it's like, oh, good point to
3:54
me. Do you have any grey Poupon
3:56
Will? We accept Grey Poupon for the
3:59
sauce, no? Dijon mustard, But the other,
4:04
the other wealthy dude's like, well, of course he's got his
4:09
little jar Grape Papon hands it over to the other wealthy dude.
4:12
Oh boy, now that Jar grape Papon can't even.
4:15
I don't even know if they're in business anymore, but can't
4:17
imagine what that must cost. Can't imagine.
4:18
I don't care because I don't like mustard.
4:20
So that's it, I'm out. I like I like some mustard.
4:22
I like some mustard. I like a honey mustard, a honey
4:24
mussy. Yes, you do like that we.
4:27
Call Sash and I our friends. Call it honey buns.
4:31
Doesn't sound good either. Doesn't sound good.
4:34
Not a fan because it's awful. Well, let's let's move on and
4:38
talk about I said you guys, the four girls were together
4:42
yesterday. What did you guys do?
4:44
What were you? Up to we went to a rage room.
4:47
A rage room. Because life.
4:50
Sucks. I'd never heard of a rage room.
4:52
Oh, really? No, until Sam had told me she
4:55
was getting up for you guys as like, birth tickets.
4:57
Yeah, Yeah, No, we went to a rage room and the so some places
5:01
I've seen, they will give you like, appliances or things like
5:06
that to smash. Some places have just a whole
5:09
bunch of stuff and they give you like a sledgehammer kind of
5:12
thing. The one we went to was a little
5:14
bit smaller. It was like an enclosed room
5:16
probably, probably about the size of like our dining room
5:18
area kind of thing. And the guy had a whole bunch of
5:21
like glassware that he'd gone to the Goodwill by the pound.
5:24
He's like, I can't beat $0.19 a pound for the glassware, You
5:27
know what I mean? OK, yeah.
5:29
So that's what the Goodwill by the pound is, OK.
5:31
Because it doesn't, you know, it's like things like incomplete
5:34
sets, whatever, maybe sure, chip 2 pairs and so you can.
5:37
Buy it because y'all don't just break it anyway.
5:39
Exactly. Yeah.
5:39
And so. You know, it was like little
5:42
like light fixture kind of things that you might put over
5:45
your light bulbs. It could be like like a wine
5:49
glass, martini glass, things like that.
5:52
OK, A crock pot lid. OK.
5:55
And so there was like light and then heavy light things you
5:58
could throw at the wall, heavy things you need to throw at the
6:00
ground. Or you could like tee off.
6:01
So there's like a barrel and then you could like smash them
6:04
with a bat. Kind of OK.
6:06
Yeah, Sam said. You had a bat and a Golf Club.
6:09
They had a they had a variety of weapons you could choose from.
6:11
We all could pick 1. So I took a bat.
6:15
Ashley took a small handheld sledgehammer, like a like almost
6:19
like a heavier hammer. Olivia took the the Golf Club,
6:25
OK. And I'm trying to think, no,
6:27
sorry. I think Sam took the little
6:29
hammer and Olivia took the Golf Club and then Ashley took a lead
6:33
pipe and it was like a long one. It was like.
6:36
Oh. OK, OK.
6:38
Ashley, Ashley. So you guys just went in there
6:42
and smashed it up, Yeah. You just screamed out your rage.
6:45
Did you scream? There was some yelling, some
6:47
yelling. Oh, they also had, like, a truck
6:49
hood. A hood of a truck.
6:50
OK, now that was less satisfying because it was like, you know,
6:53
the hood part that you would normally see was against the
6:56
wall. Yeah.
6:57
And then you could see the underside of it.
6:58
So you couldn't really see when you were making the.
6:59
Dance and green your sister said that was lame and now the.
7:02
Windshield. The windshield.
7:04
There was a windshield. And I say I said, yeah, they
7:06
just popped this right out of Sam's car when we got here.
7:10
No windshield, Yeah. That was really satisfying and
7:13
we all smashed the fuck out of that.
7:16
But yeah, no. Then towards the end we were
7:18
like, all right, just say something.
7:19
Fuck, it pisses you off. And then we would say something.
7:21
We would fucking smash. Oh shit, there you go now,
7:24
Ashley. So they gave you like coveralls?
7:26
Right, I'm sure goggles or something.
7:28
They had like a face shield. OK, Got the back of your heads
7:30
just open. So you had to be careful.
7:31
So whoever smashed the shit behind you, be careful.
7:34
Yeah, yes, 100%. So I'm glad you had a face
7:36
shield. Right.
7:37
So we all will kind of like stand behind like the barrel
7:39
when we put some of the barrels, you smashed stuff off of it, OK,
7:41
And and then you had So Ashley goes, she just goes like hit the
7:48
barrel with the lead pipe and she boom and then it fucking
7:52
flies back, No. It hit her in the.
7:54
Face. No, she had her face shield.
7:56
On. And she's like, that's what the
7:57
shield. Was there but.
7:59
I we all saw I was like. Oh shit.
8:03
It was OK the dude's using that video later for anyone who goes
8:06
in there like This is why you don't we wear face Shields, but
8:10
it was really cool. It was like you if you brought
8:13
10 non perishable food items in for like the food drive, they
8:16
would record it for you for free.
8:18
That's and I heard some of their I didn't watch it.
8:20
Sam was watching it last night and I.
8:22
Also, I heard something smashed and I just heard somebody go
8:25
woo. I My favorite thing that I
8:29
smashed was this like like a light fixture kind of frosted
8:33
glass thing that you had put over and it was kind of like
8:36
round and so it kind of fit in your hand really well.
8:38
And then I fucking just chucked at the wall when it hit you.
8:41
It just kind of oh, nice, nice Sam.
8:43
I think she said she threw to the ground because it was heavy,
8:48
like maybe a casserole. Dish or something?
8:49
Oh. No, no, no, no.
8:50
She had a crock pot lid and she had on the barrel and then she
8:52
had the little handheld hammer and she fucking slammed it down
8:56
on the handle. You can imagine if it was like a
8:57
center kind of a little and it just fucking.
9:00
Yeah, like, yeah, she said. Something just like
9:02
disintegrated. Like, it was awesome.
9:04
It was like perfect. It was really, really.
9:06
Good. I was like, oh, that's cool.
9:07
Yeah, her only her only beef was she wished for like a 2 minute
9:11
warning. I agree.
9:12
We had 20 minutes to and I I wish we had had like a 2 minute
9:15
warning because we didn't get through everything.
9:18
Yeah. She's like, there was a whole
9:19
table and shit, I would have just smashed, started smashing.
9:21
It like crazy. We, we, we got through most of
9:23
it. There's and maybe they don't
9:24
want to give you 2 more warnings so you don't do that Well, I'm
9:27
sure but then there was stuff a 25 there was probably like but
9:29
even like a countdown 10-9 something like that would have
9:32
been really helpful yeah but otherwise she said it was great
9:35
yeah yeah, cuz cuz there was there was.
9:37
I mean, there was maybe 10 items we didn't get to.
9:39
We smashed most of it. All right, well, that's not bad.
9:42
No no, no, it really wasn't bad but yeah no we were all just
9:45
gonna take it turns like OK, you go now you go OK go OK cool cuz
9:48
we wanna make sure everybody got it Certain amount certainly and
9:51
there's one part Ashley goes do you know if I just like go down
9:54
in this thing for like 30 seconds right go for it and
9:57
I'll. Just go to town on this thing
9:59
for 30 seconds. She's got like.
10:02
The basil that. She's just hauling.
10:03
Off and whacking the she's hauling off and whacking the
10:07
windshield or whatever, certainly and whatnot.
10:10
So I want to know. I have a question for you.
10:11
OK, OK, you tell me your opinion.
10:14
How hard was it? To go from full rage in a rage
10:17
room to like, time's up, everybody get out and now you
10:19
got to be happy again. Like you have to switch.
10:22
You can't go out. You can't go out there still
10:25
smashing crap. You know, you just got to
10:26
switch. Switch it off.
10:28
Honestly, it's funny because it's like you're, you're, we're
10:32
like trying to say things like, oh, like I'm pissed off about
10:35
whatever. Like and then you smash a thing
10:38
and, and so it's like you're you're doing that, but the same
10:41
time it's like when you're smashing like, OK, that's pretty
10:43
fun. It is, yeah.
10:44
You're having a good time. So you when you leave, you're
10:46
like, OK, you're like that. Was fun, Samson the two she was
10:49
like especially when she said she I guess it must have been
10:51
the crock pot. Yeah, because it was like.
10:53
Oh my God. It was like, that was amazing.
10:55
Yeah. So it's like, so there was still
10:56
some still laughed and, you know, whatever, It wasn't like
10:59
all like, no, you didn't walk out like enraged.
11:03
Yeah. So I was like, OK, good.
11:05
We were trying to hype ourselves up going in.
11:07
We were trying to play some angry music.
11:09
They left the house and they were like, give me some, give me
11:11
something to be mad about. And I said, well, I don't know
11:14
if I told you this story, but the woman, there was someone
11:16
that called me a bitch. And I was really sad about it.
11:19
I can't remember. Why did you call me?
11:22
And I was like, you go smash something for that person.
11:24
Called me a bitch, so and then. Why did you tell me?
11:28
Didn't tell me that I've been pissed and then there was a
11:32
bitch. Like an Amar.
11:35
I actually don't even know her. I won't name names, of course,
11:39
but someone had kind of insulted me a little bit.
11:41
It was like Tina. She's leading this time.
11:44
No, no, we love Tina. Not Tina.
11:45
If you're listening, we love you.
11:47
I told Sam she's like, yeah, I'm going to smash something for
11:49
that. I'm going to smash something for
11:50
you. I got you, mom.
11:50
And I was like, OK. I was like, cool, we all got we
11:53
go smash them. I think everybody's got either a
11:55
Co worker or some kind of stupid ass policy like Sam's got some
12:00
problems with like a form or something like that and.
12:04
Heavy breathing from the dogs on the on the microphone.
12:10
OK, go get your toy. Go get it.
12:12
Go get your toy. So, yeah, I mean, it's not, I
12:17
don't know of a workplace that is perfect.
12:19
So of course everybody's going to have something.
12:21
Yeah, that 100%. They're not going to be happy
12:24
about it at work now and then. Hopefully not all the time and I
12:27
don't all the time. So no, hopefully, hopefully it's
12:31
not that often. But yeah, it's good to kind of
12:33
get in there and it was good. And then venture anger.
12:37
Yeah. Sometimes life just ain't
12:39
fucking. Fair well and exactly exactly
12:41
whatever it is, whatever it is that's sometimes you're saying
12:44
much sports because sometimes you're sandwich sports.
12:47
You were telling me that when you guys came out they had like
12:48
post notes all around. Is it all around there like?
12:51
Yeah, like a like a lobby area. Lobby area.
12:53
Oh. So we're wearing coveralls and
12:56
Sam, Olivia and Ash are all wearing black coveralls.
12:58
And then he tells me I want to give you the Michael Myers
13:00
treatment. And I had like blue.
13:02
Oh, OK, OK. I like the the same color of the
13:05
Michael Myers. OK.
13:05
So that's kind of. Funny.
13:06
Did you guys take a picture in your coveralls?
13:08
Yes, please. OK, good.
13:09
Good. And we were all wearing and we
13:10
we get out and get in the car. We're like, damn, I have to get
13:14
some coveralls. Mr. Coffee is God.
13:17
And I was like, this is. Carlson I'm gonna be everywhere
13:21
we go. You guys are gonna be in
13:22
coveralls. But yeah.
13:25
And then they gave us. Suppliers.
13:26
The end. I could pull the glass out of my
13:28
shoe. Is it my God?
13:31
Well, I guess you got to pay attention to can't wear some
13:33
thin little Oh God I guess don't go in and flip flops.
13:36
You have to wear close to her shoes.
13:37
And then Sam Ashley had it right because they wore like.
13:41
Boots she she probably wore. Her like combat boots?
13:43
Yeah, she didn't wear the steel toed ones.
13:44
Oh, OK. They're probably at work because
13:46
she keeps them at work. Well, I'll be darned.
13:48
OK. Well, I'm glad you guys had fun.
13:50
It was fun. Sounds really fun.
13:52
Go smash other people's shoes. I wish I could remember what the
13:54
name of the place called. I want to look it up.
13:57
Yeah, maybe we'll we'll. I'll look at them and I'll post
13:59
a pic. Yeah.
14:00
So what were some of the post? It notes that people had written
14:03
all of the lobby. So some so some of them were
14:05
like a little sad just because it's like, you know, people were
14:08
in there because batshit. A lot of it is because bad
14:10
things have happened and and this is just the only way like.
14:13
And there's a lot of batshit. Happens to good people.
14:15
Maybe their their boyfriend cheated on them.
14:17
Some people said like fuck cancer.
14:19
Some people said, fuck, you know, disease, whatever it is,
14:21
yeah, fuck. One of them said something about
14:25
like a driver. So it's like I'm sure somebody
14:27
got in a bad car accident, like a drunk driver.
14:29
I don't know. Who knows, could be, you know,
14:32
mine said. Fuck Missouri drivers because
14:34
fuck that. We've established scientifically
14:37
that they are the worst. We have.
14:39
We have. Some of them.
14:43
Were. Like fuck fuck 9:00 to. 59 to
14:46
5:00 I've heard that I. Also put fuck work until I die.
14:49
Work until I die. That's the worst.
14:51
So there's just a lot of, so whatever your frustrations are,
14:55
whatever you're mad at, you just can put it on the wall there.
14:57
That's cool, that's cool. And he's like, we don't sincere.
15:00
He's like, the only thing we say is nothing against first
15:02
responders, Things like that. We don't want.
15:05
And I get that. Sure, don't get me wrong.
15:07
And of course, nothing against like, no.
15:09
You can't explore. The police.
15:11
Police. He said like, no, no ethnic
15:14
slurs, no, nothing against anybody with religion.
15:17
Yeah. He's like, he's like, I
15:18
shouldn't have to say this, but nothing against that, that,
15:21
that. And we're like, we got just
15:22
100%. And you should not, obviously,
15:26
but the guy was a cool guy. I said that.
15:28
I said to them I was like, because we're exactly the person
15:31
that I thought would be running this.
15:32
It was him and his daughter. Were there help?
15:34
You know what? An interesting business.
15:35
I know he goes get, you know, 19.
15:37
Cents a pound for for glasses. Come on in here and break it up.
15:41
That's. Awesome.
15:43
Yeah, I love it. I'm glad you guys.
15:45
Had so it was fun. Well, let me tell you something.
15:47
OK, so all right. So we're talking about like some
15:50
bad juju, bad luck, You know what I mean?
15:52
You know, OK, bad things happen to people right in there, in
15:55
there. Let me tell you how you avoid
15:58
that. Oh.
15:59
OK. OK, be independently wealthy.
16:02
Well, that's one way, maybe. OK.
16:07
But I'll tell you so, OK, the listeners that don't know which
16:12
if you don't know. I don't know.
16:13
You don't know. You don't know you don't know.
16:15
You don't know. You don't know.
16:16
I don't know. Who don't know because they
16:17
don't know. We're going to learn you up
16:20
today. We are.
16:22
We've talked about this, you know that for the last like 2
16:24
weeks I've been like writing my like book or whatever that we've
16:27
been talking about. Now I've been talking about it
16:29
on here. I'm good for.
16:30
Reading. Good for you, I'm all.
16:32
The way up to I've got. 16 chapters 16 and I'm on chapter
16:34
10. I finished chapter 10.
16:36
Oh hello. So I'm doing, I'm doing good.
16:37
You think it's good? I do.
16:39
I think it's all right. I think it's real good listener
16:41
though. We've established that I am very
16:42
easily entertained and that's OK.
16:44
So I might not be the best person to give an opinion
16:46
that's. OK, it's got to be really bad.
16:48
For me to be like, walk away, be like, Nope, this is crap.
16:53
But I think it's good. I'm I want to read more.
16:55
And I think that's kind of your litmus test maybe or something
16:58
like, yeah, if you don't want to read anymore, then it's not any
17:01
good, right? So I got to know what happens.
17:03
So I haven't gone into what the plot is on the art pod just
17:06
because it's my bucket. Book.
17:07
It's your book, and we want people to buy it.
17:09
Yeah, OK. OK.
17:10
But hopefully I will say, I will say that it has to do with
17:14
ancient Greece in some capacity. And so I've had to do a lot of
17:18
research on ancient Greece. Well, anybody who rights has to
17:23
do research. I wish I I think I.
17:25
Listen, for the day that I finished this book, I should
17:28
have been taking a list of all the fucking questions.
17:30
I've had you should have all your searches.
17:33
Yeah, all of my fucking. Searches that would have been.
17:35
Funny because some of them are are pretty fucking.
17:37
Stupid. I was, I was yelling.
17:39
At well, you want to be accurate, unless it's like high
17:42
fantasy, you don't have to be. Well, yeah, some things you you
17:44
need to be. Accurate.
17:45
There's a, there's a, there's a part where my main character is
17:49
trying to climb like a cargo net.
17:51
OK, OK. And there's somebody that's
17:52
supposed to be like coaching her through this.
17:54
And I don't know what the best technique is to climb a cargo
17:58
net. Shocking.
17:59
I wouldn't know that either. Yeah, so.
18:00
I'm watching a video on somebody who's like, all right, this is
18:03
the best way to climb up. OK, now they climb up.
18:06
OK, I got got it. Got it.
18:08
Writing notes now. She's sitting at the top.
18:10
OK, now we're gonna go into this.
18:12
I'm like, fucking get to it. Climb.
18:14
I literally I'm sitting on the couch and I say, I say.
18:18
Just climb down the net already. And Ashley?
18:21
'S like what are you doing over there?
18:22
Because she thought I was. Writing the book and I go, I'm
18:25
writing the book. I promise this is research.
18:27
So yes. So it's.
18:30
Yeah. So some sometimes it's a little
18:32
funny. That is for things that that
18:33
you. That's awesome.
18:34
That's awesome. Yeah.
18:36
You're gonna have to keep a list of your Google searches.
18:37
I'm gonna have to. That's a although there's a way,
18:40
I think you can see it, your history.
18:42
Yeah. So it's pretty funny.
18:44
So I'm going to have to look through it, but.
18:47
What is that show? America?
18:49
No, it's the show The American Gladiators.
18:54
Is that what it was? And they, the, the, the big buff
18:57
people tried to like, knock the other people off whatever.
19:01
Yeah. I've never been on American
19:02
Gladiators and that's the only place I've seen people climb
19:04
the. Cargo.
19:06
Ninja Warrior, You're right, it's not.
19:08
I started to say that and I thought, well, maybe I'm wrong,
19:10
but you're right. It's probably in both.
19:11
They do it in both, right? Oh, they do, yeah, bunch of
19:13
stuff. But so yeah, no, I've never done
19:16
those. So I've never, I don't think
19:17
I've ever climbed a cargo on it either.
19:20
And I know I couldn't do it now. So yeah, it's tough.
19:23
Looks hard. I go.
19:24
Out to I went out to lunch today with listener, Erica OK and and
19:28
listener. Mandy, I think assuming I'm
19:30
assuming a listener OK, we're. Talking about like a zip line or
19:33
something like that. And Erica was saying how has she
19:35
done a zip line over like a body of water?
19:38
And she said, and there was like a land mass.
19:39
But and then she turns and she goes, you'll know what this is
19:42
called. OK, She's subscribing.
19:45
I'm like, yeah, I that's like, I'm pretty sure that you're
19:48
describing a peninsula there. It's a.
19:51
Peninsula or a plateau? No, a peninsula.
19:53
OK, OK, because it was like body of water and then, oh, it jutted
19:56
out OK yes, peninsula. Now we did do a little bit more
19:58
research. It turns out it's more of an
19:59
isthmus oh, OK OK, more of an isthmus now there's a
20:02
difference. Tell the listener the.
20:04
Difference An isthmus connects 2 like pieces of land, correct?
20:10
It's like a thin strip of land that connects 2 larger areas of.
20:15
Right, so it doesn't just go out and go into the water.
20:17
It does connect to another, another.
20:19
So there, there is, but it's it's a hard word to say.
20:23
It's a hard word to. Say and I.
20:24
Just keep wrong. It's it's who made-up this word.
20:27
Why? Would you make up?
20:28
A word so hard, maybe it was somebody's name and they named
20:31
it after themselves. I was cracking up because Erica
20:33
looked me. Then the end goes.
20:34
You're going to know this. She was correct.
20:37
That's. Hilarious.
20:37
And I did. That's awesome.
20:39
But but none of this is is the thing that's going to keep the
20:42
bad luck away. What is going to keep Bad Mother
20:46
Way? Yeah, I know.
20:47
I'm sorry. What is going to keep the bad
20:49
luck away is apotropaic magic. Well, what is that?
20:54
Well, let me tell you. Let me tell what it is.
20:56
OK, It it originated with the Greeks, but then the Romans sort
21:00
of perfected it. And it's a type of magic
21:02
intended to turn away harm or evil influences, as in
21:06
deflecting misfortune or reverting the evil eye.
21:10
Now the evil eyes, basically, it could be envy, jealousy.
21:15
It's sort of like a super. It's basically a, a the, the
21:19
things that they do were sort of like superstitions or like good
21:22
luck charms, you know, you things like crossing your
21:25
fingers, knocking on wood. This is the kind of stuff that's
21:27
what apatropaic magic is, more or less.
21:30
And they believe that like, if you were like fortunate that the
21:35
evil eye would be drawn to you, right.
21:37
And we've looked at you didn't like bad fortune would befall
21:39
you. This is this is a thing that
21:41
like lots of lots of like things like ancient Egypt, They they
21:45
believed in this. Well, that was like a Greek
21:47
thing too, because there was a whole big thing as.
21:50
I said it started with. The mom would put the.
21:52
Evil eye on a daughter-in-law or something like.
21:56
There were some read stories where the.
21:58
Grandma would put the evil eye on you, yeah.
22:00
There are some things in ancient Egypt that relate to this, but
22:03
it was it started with the Greeks and then the Rome was
22:05
kind of perfected. OK, they perfected the evil eye.
22:08
They. Perfected the whole thing.
22:09
They prevented the apotropaic magic.
22:11
OK now, so because. So here's the thing, OK, so if
22:15
you go to Rome, OK, you will see little Dicks everywhere, OK?
22:22
Like carved into things on things or statues with like,
22:26
like just like the head and the block of like a stone and a
22:29
little Dick carved on the front of it or, or they're on like
22:32
signposts or they're like. Or what not.
22:35
OK, so why? Because.
22:37
They believed that it would divert the evil eye they would
22:41
be. Drawn.
22:42
The evil eye would be drawn to the Dick pic.
22:44
Oh God, and then you could get. By without they noticed holy.
22:49
Shit, so. So that's a legit thing?
22:52
So they would wear a whole ambulance no with.
22:55
So many Dicks. Why?
22:59
Do they still do this now? No, this is ancient.
23:01
Rock OK, OK. I was like, it's.
23:02
Very ancient roll look. At that, put out the Dick.
23:04
Tiny one just in case. Are the Dick pics all over all
23:07
still open? That's a that's a sad one all
23:09
over all over the place little coin.
23:11
Actual as hell. Wow ring on your ring.
23:15
Can you imagine? I'm just going to wear like it
23:18
is with. A little like a wind chime.
23:20
It is a wind time that's wrong on so many levels.
23:24
So I just hung that outside your home and then it wouldn't.
23:26
The evil eye wouldn't be able to get into your house.
23:29
Oh my God, I've never heard how to avert the evil eye.
23:34
I've heard of people getting the evil eye put on the curves or
23:36
something and putting evil eye on them.
23:37
So that's the thing, this like ever present threat of invisible
23:43
evil weighs heavily on the minds of the believers, right.
23:46
OK. And And so you're seeking
23:47
protection, all right. Obviously in any way, shape or
23:51
form. And one of the more potent
23:53
defenses was to distract it with amulets shaped like boners.
23:59
That that's not right. That is not right.
24:06
According to Pliny according to Pliny the Elder, which is a a
24:10
Roman OK Pliny the Elder amulets featuring phalluses so that one
24:19
that had like the certainly that were worn by everyone from
24:22
military generals to little babies and.
24:25
Whoever came up with that is still laughing their ass off
24:28
that they managed to get all these people to believe that and
24:33
put put boners on everything. Military generals to little
24:36
babies sometimes put a little put a little Amy on the baby
24:39
just to keep. Him safe just keep him safe keep
24:40
him safe we. Can't have any lie on the baby.
24:42
Why risk it? Why risk it your kid but just
24:45
wear this Dick. What is happening?
24:49
Who who? Who is the genius behind this
24:54
movement? I want names.
24:58
So that's the thing. So, OK, when you're looking at
24:59
statues, right? You're looking at like Greek or
25:02
Roman marble statues, and a lot of them are naked because that's
25:05
how that's how things work, OK. And a lot of people are like,
25:09
why are the Dicks so small on these statues?
25:11
OK? It is supposed to symbolize like
25:14
restraint, being humble, things like that.
25:18
OK, OK, that's humility, self-control.
25:22
This is what like that symbolized.
25:24
It has nothing to do with whether or not the man had a
25:27
small. Penis, I see.
25:28
Apparently everybody in Rome has a small PB.
25:30
But but that's why when you would have like the the Dicks
25:38
that are meant to protect you, these are like large distracting
25:42
boners because they would distract the evil.
25:46
Eye. Oh my God, it is so that I don't
25:51
even. I don't even know.
25:53
It's sort of like if you were walking around and also you saw
25:55
a naked man. You're like, Oh my God.
25:57
And you look away. That's what the evil eye.
26:00
Is doing. It works I guess.
26:03
I guess it works. That's exactly what you would
26:06
do. You would be like.
26:07
Oh my God, don't look at that. Oh my God, what in the world?
26:11
I mean, some people might look, but other people?
26:14
Most people. Like we said, this is the wind.
26:16
Chime, but sometimes. Be placed outside the home to
26:20
protect the whole household. Right.
26:23
OK, sometimes you would see like I showed you the one that was
26:30
like a like an Amy, like a warrior, and it was a Dick that
26:33
had its own Dick. I saw that, yes, I saw that the
26:37
one had three double protection. Why not triple?
26:40
Why not? Pass the first one, you ain't
26:42
gonna pass the second. Why not triple, triple the
26:43
protection? Triple the protection.
26:47
That's like a gum, isn't there? No, no anthropomorphic.
26:52
Dick with the Dick of its area owned and it's suspiciously Dick
26:55
like tail. It's three times the evil
26:57
finding Dick power in one object.
26:59
OK, just send me that picture where they post that one.
27:01
People are going to be like, what the fuck is this?
27:03
We're. Going to get flagged on Facebook
27:04
for this one. No, it's, it's ancient art.
27:10
OK, that isn't right. And the fact that you know that.
27:13
I had found out that information I had to, I do some research,
27:16
but I actually already knew most of that information and I just,
27:19
I just confirmed it because when you're taking Greco Roman art
27:23
history, right, you know what's all over the place And, and
27:27
especially in Doctor Mont. Did Doctor Mont teach you that?
27:29
Doctor Mont taught me about this, of course.
27:31
Dr. Mont Allen. Is the best.
27:33
Yep. I love Doctor Al.
27:35
Doctor Mont Allen. He taught you about about the
27:38
phallus is all over everything in Rome.
27:40
OK, They're still there. You'll still see them.
27:43
Wow. OK, someday, now, someday we'll
27:46
see them. Ancient artifacts and ancient
27:49
history and you can't fuck with them.
27:51
You can't. I mean, you could, but you
27:52
could. Get out of there.
27:57
Stop that. What?
27:58
These are diversionary tactics. You divert.
28:01
The evil eye. OK, good to know so.
28:02
Listen people, if you're, if you're like, man, I feel like
28:04
there's a lot of bad fortune to follow me.
28:06
Put a Dick on your house. Start wearing one around your
28:08
neck. Get a tattoo you get a tattoo be
28:11
on your be Audi permanently evil.
28:12
I could never head. Right across you for it.
28:16
Nobody's gonna mess with. You no one's gonna.
28:18
Not guarantee it, I guarantee or everyone will mess with you and
28:22
you'll. Be bullied and mercilessly and
28:23
I'm not sure which. I'm not gonna find out.
28:26
I'm not gonna test the theory. Now, it did say say Kornos have
28:30
become the pointy amulet of choice.
28:32
It's just kind of looks like a like a a little.
28:36
Kind of. Tail looking thing, you know
28:39
it's the little little pointy squiggly thing.
28:41
Yep, as penis shaped jewelry, jewelry is no longer considered
28:45
the norm. I.
28:48
Wonder what Bachelorette parties being the exception.
28:52
That's true. It's true.
28:54
My or gay bachelor parties. Take your pick.
28:56
Now a lot of them do. The black sperm, the new style,
28:59
true. So there is that.
29:01
OK. Oh, hey, you never know.
29:04
You never know what's gonna, gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna try
29:06
really hard to come up with a different way to deflect.
29:09
People I because. Not a fan.
29:12
I can understand that. Yeah, not a fan.
29:14
So you can. Understand that?
29:15
Yeah, but you know. You know, somebody as a joke
29:19
came up with that shit. Yeah.
29:21
And got everybody I'm on board. Yeah.
29:24
And they are. They're still, like I said,
29:26
they're, they're still laughing to this day.
29:29
To well, they're probably dead. I don't know, man.
29:31
They're laughing in the grave, They're laughing in heaven.
29:33
I don't know. They're they, they're like, Oh
29:35
my God, I scammed all these people.
29:38
So I just wanted to share that because sometimes I think that
29:41
we all kind of get a little down on our luck.
29:42
And if you don't have time to get to a rage room, make sure
29:45
you put a Dick up on your house. There you go.
29:47
That's true. You're that's true.
29:50
If you can't get to the rage room, there's there's another
29:52
there's another option for us. So this is this is a the dash
29:57
for the effects of the evil eye were thoroughly described by
30:00
Giuseppe E Tray in 1889. If you have to speak or sing at
30:06
a public gathering, all of a sudden you lose your voice.
30:09
Or if it's at night, the lights go out, a window opens, and your
30:11
papers are either messed up or blown away.
30:13
If you are in love and your love is returned, the Jetta Tore can
30:17
easily cool your girl's passion. I don't know what that.
30:20
Means no idea. If you depend on a friend for
30:22
some important business, you can be sure he'll get sick just the
30:25
day you need him. While until yesterday he was
30:28
ready to help out. A storekeeper will begin to know
30:30
his customers avoided his shop. A child under the influence of
30:33
an occult and an inexplicable illness will begin to waste
30:40
away. So if you want to avoid those
30:42
things happening penis, penis, there are other there are other
30:47
options. But the penis is the most
30:49
effective. The most effective Well, who
30:51
knew so many uses? Who knew not me?
30:54
Who knew ancient Romans do? Who knew not us?
30:57
Who knew? Oh my God.
30:59
OK, OK, but it's important. I'm glad we shared this
31:01
information. Safety is important.
31:03
That is important. OK, so this is funny because my
31:07
story actually doesn't tie into this at all, but it's the I.
31:12
Mean my story? Well, it doesn't die news at
31:16
all. It actually it does because of
31:19
the you said like when you see the the penis and you're like,
31:23
ah, don't look at that, you look away.
31:25
Correct. OK, correct.
31:26
This story I heard, the story Melissa McCarthy told.
31:28
And. It cracked my shit up.
31:31
She was going to be in a film and, you know, they're working
31:36
on her costumes, whatever, and she wants this certain brand of
31:38
Spanx to wear. OK, OK.
31:41
And they were like, well, give us an order number, like a, you
31:45
know, a style number, give us something so we know what to
31:47
order. And she kept forgetting to bring
31:48
it, you know, when, when she would go into wherever the
31:52
meetings, whatever. And so one day she was getting
31:55
ready to go and she saw them. And she's like, you know what,
31:58
since you can't remember to pick these up and put them in your
32:00
bag, you're I'm, you're going to have to wear them.
32:02
So we're going to put them on and I'll have them with me for
32:05
sure. So she puts them on OK and then
32:08
she puts on a sweater and a pair of slacks and then over the
32:11
space. Yes.
32:11
And then she's like I go whenever I go to the, you know,
32:16
wherever they're, if they're going into meetings or go to
32:17
shoot wherever. She's like I, I basically am
32:19
like a Sherpa. I have like 6 bags on me.
32:22
I have like my purse and this bag for this and this bag for
32:24
that, like laptop, you know, all these she's like, I have all
32:26
these different bags. And so I'm weighted down
32:28
crossbody bag, this, that and the other.
32:30
She's got all these bags. And so she walks out of the
32:33
house and these gentlemen are there to who are working on
32:36
putting up the fence. She sees they're there to work
32:39
on the fence that they weren't putting up.
32:41
And so then. They look at her.
32:43
And then they kind of all like look away really fast.
32:45
And she's like, oh, I wonder if they're mad that it was kind of
32:48
a rainy day. And so she was like, oh, I
32:52
wonder if they're mad that I made them.
32:54
Like, I don't want them to think that they have to be here on a
32:56
rainy day. I can tell them.
32:57
So like they can go. And so she goes outside and
32:59
she's like, hey, guys, like, sorry, it's kind of rainy.
33:02
If you don't want to work on it, that's fine.
33:03
They're like, no, no, no, no, it's fine.
33:05
And they're all like looking up. They won't let meet her in the
33:07
eye. They're just like looking
33:08
anywhere but at her. And she's like, well, the fence,
33:12
she's like, she's like, they're just being really weird.
33:13
And I just don't know what to do.
33:15
So then I'm like, well, the fence is looking great.
33:17
I, I really love it. You guys are doing a great job.
33:20
And she's like, but they keep looking up and they're looking
33:23
up like so funny. I think something's on the roof.
33:26
So she turns around. And she's like, what's up there?
33:30
What's in the roof? Do I need somebody to cut this
33:31
our cat up there like what's on the roof?
33:32
And so she keeps kind of turning back and forth, turning to them,
33:35
turning into the roof because they keep looking up there.
33:37
And then, finally, she realizes. That because of all her.
33:40
Bags her sweater has shifted up to just.
33:42
Under her boobs and her. Pants have fallen down all
33:46
they're. Seeing is the Spanx, they don't
33:52
want to look and that's why you know they're looking.
33:56
And she goes. And then I kept 316 myself.
33:58
I can't turn around. And so it's like, if the front
34:01
view wasn't bad enough, look at the rear end.
34:03
But guys, you know, I was just like pointing at her back,
34:06
backside, and I was like, holy shit.
34:12
The sweater ran up just under the boobs.
34:14
She's like, where were your pants?
34:17
Oh, I'm getting there. She's just like, I feel them
34:19
down about mid calf. She's like all they're.
34:22
Seeing is bare knees and nude spangs.
34:28
And she goes, it was horrifying. It was horrifying for everybody
34:34
involved. And so she's like, Oh my God.
34:38
So now she's got to bend out and pull her pants.
34:43
Oh my God. So.
34:45
So honestly, the Dick theory does work.
34:48
Nobody wants to look. That's right.
34:49
I told you. Because they were doing that.
34:51
They were looking everywhere but at her.
34:53
They didn't want to look. I told you so.
34:56
You think I would ever give bad advice on this?
34:58
No. Now, this is more relates to
35:01
what I was talking about because I'm going to do a Zodiac.
35:04
We haven't done a Zodiac in a while.
35:06
It has been a while. It has been a while.
35:07
Let's do one. And like I said, I've been doing
35:08
a lot of research on Greek things because I have to,
35:12
because I wasn't there. To learn to experience it, which
35:15
is probably for the best because they didn't treat the women too
35:17
well. No and no.
35:20
The plumbing is not gonna be as good.
35:22
It wasn't existing at all Legit. And.
35:26
No feminine products, Forget that.
35:28
No deodorant. Yeah.
35:29
My Can you imagine living in a Spartan society without
35:32
deodorant? No.
35:33
Oh, that's that is a terrifying thought.
35:35
Oh, OK. Yeah, we don't.
35:37
We don't live. Back then, OK, correct.
35:39
Just nude guys, just wrestling, no vaccines, Yeah.
35:44
Yeah, Yeah, that's a bad time. Bad time.
35:45
OK, moving on. OK, what we're going to do is.
35:49
What is your Greek? God or Goddess based on your
35:52
Zodiac? OK, OK, here we go.
35:53
All right, all right. Awesome, Aries.
35:57
Your Aries. Your Aries.
35:58
God of War, Shocker, shocking God of War.
36:01
You're a natural born leader, fiery, impulsive and always
36:05
ready for a challenge. Just like Aries, you charge head
36:07
first into battle or just into Monday mornings with unmatched
36:10
zeal and unstoppable drive. OK, I wish.
36:13
I need that. Mm hmm.
36:16
Taurus, you're Demeter. Not not Taurus.
36:19
Taurus. No, not that.
36:20
Which is not in fact the God doors.
36:22
The God Taurus. OK.
36:24
No. How do you say that name again?
36:27
It's not Demeter. Nope, it's actually Demeter.
36:30
Demeter, OK, Goddess of the harvest, loyal, grounded, and
36:36
deeply appreciative of life's comforts.
36:37
You bring abundance wherever you go.
36:39
You're the stable, nurturing force, much like much like
36:42
Demeter, cultivating the earth and providing sustenance.
36:46
Oh, sustenance. We like that, Fussen.
36:48
We love some substance. We love some substance.
36:51
All right, Gemini. Gemini, you're Hermes, messenger
36:54
of the gods, witty, quick witted in a master communicator, you
36:57
can talk your way into and out of anything.
36:59
Hermes would be proud of your multitasking social butterfly
37:02
skills and your insatiable curiosity.
37:05
Cancer. OK, Cancer.
37:07
You're you're. That's Wayne.
37:09
That's Wayne. You're Hesha, the OR Hestia, I'm
37:12
not really sure. Goddess of the Hearth.
37:15
Hearth, hearth, Hearth, Goddess of the hearth.
37:18
Goddess of the Hearth, Nurturing, home, loving and
37:20
deeply empathetic, you create a safe haven for everyone around
37:23
you. Your warmth, devotion and
37:24
protective instincts are the very essence of home and family.
37:27
My God, nailed it in one. Wow.
37:29
Yep. OK.
37:31
That's incredible. All right, Leo, you're a Zeus,
37:34
king of the gods. Oh, wow.
37:36
We fucking hate Zeus. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
37:38
Sorry, Zeus. Sorry, Leo.
37:39
Zeus is not a good dude. No, OK.
37:41
Never has been. Never will be.
37:43
Yeah, but just a charismatic and always in the spotlight.
37:45
You were born to rule. Your confidence shines brighter
37:48
than any lightning bolt, commanding attention and
37:49
inspiring loyalty effortlessly. You got that main character
37:53
energy. OK, Leo.
37:54
All right, all right. Virgo, you are Athena, goddess
37:59
of wisdom and war strategy. Okay, we love Athena.
38:03
We've talked about our favorite Greek gods, so yeah, this is one
38:06
of yours, okay? She's up there, that's what.
38:09
Athens. Okay.
38:10
The Parthenon. Gotcha, gotcha.
38:13
All comes together. Intelligent, analytical and
38:15
always striving for perfection, you approach life with a keen
38:18
mind and strategic prowess. You're the ultimate problem
38:20
solver, always seeking practical, logical solutions.
38:22
Now I would argue that this should have maybe been
38:24
Capricorn. Yeah, I'll argue.
38:26
I would. I'd argue that as well.
38:27
OK. All right.
38:28
Moving on. Libra, you are Aphrodite,
38:31
goddess of love and beauty. Graceful, charming and always
38:34
seeking harmony, you embody balance and aesthetical appeal.
38:37
You're a natural at bringing people together, finding beauty
38:40
in everything, and advocating for fairness.
38:43
OK. Let's see, let's see, let's see.
38:45
Scorpio. Scorpio, you are Hades, God of
38:48
the underworld. We should have all seen this
38:49
coming. Yeah, that kind of sounds right.
38:51
Yeah. Mysterious, intense, and deeply
38:53
powerful, you're not afraid to explore the depths of life.
38:56
Your loyalty is fierce, your presence commands respect, and
38:58
your insights cut straight to the truth, Sagittarius.
39:01
That's me, ladies. You are Apollo, God of light,
39:04
music and prophecy. OK, cool.
39:06
Yeah. You like?
39:07
Yeah. I'm cool with it.
39:07
Yeah, that's awesome. Optimistic, adventurous, and
39:10
always seeking knowledge, you eliminate every room you enter.
39:13
Your spirit is your spirit is free, much like Apollo's rays of
39:17
sunshine, inspiring creativity and truth.
39:19
Yep. That's awesome.
39:21
I love it. OK, all right.
39:24
She doesn't seem too happy with Capricorn, but we could trade it
39:27
out. Well, we can't.
39:29
Yeah, I'm sorry, Libra. Fuck you.
39:30
I'm taking a peanut. Capricorn, we're Kronos, God of
39:33
time, or Rhea Rhea, Rhea, Queen of the Titans.
39:38
Disciplined, ambitious, and incredibly persistent, you're
39:41
the master of long term goals. You build empires one
39:44
responsible, well planned step at a time with unwavering
39:46
termination. Still pretty good.
39:49
Ronan's got fucking got. He did get got.
39:51
Sorry. Yeah, don't like him.
39:54
But what about Rhea? Rhea.
39:56
I don't know who that is. The Rhea Ripley.
39:58
What is she? The wrestler I know who that is
40:01
the the Rhea, Queen of the Titans.
40:03
Queen of the Titans. That's pretty badass.
40:05
She got got too. How do you know?
40:07
Because she's a Titan. All the Titans got caught.
40:10
The the Titans had to get overthrown.
40:11
Nor for the gods to take over on the.
40:14
Read up on your mythology. Sorry Libra, we're swapping.
40:17
I could have been. Hephaestus, you know what I'm
40:19
saying? Could be a Festus.
40:20
God of the forge. Go to.
40:22
Well, you're going to start writing your own.
40:23
I guess I'm going to have to. Come on, come on.
40:26
I was pretty disappointed in the ones I found.
40:28
All right, OK, Aquarius, your Prometheus, Titan of foresight
40:32
and fire. Also fucking terrible.
40:33
I asked for what? There's so many gods.
40:36
Why are we? We didn't ask for Titans.
40:37
I didn't ask for Titans. We asked for gods.
40:39
I asked for. I asked for gods.
40:40
Boo. I asked for Titans.
40:42
I asked for Titans. It could have been Heracles, you
40:47
know what I'm saying? Heracles was a God.
40:49
Later, there's all kinds of gods.
40:50
Like all kinds of Nicks. Yeah.
40:52
Love Nicks. Love Nicks.
40:53
Live Dianisis party. Yeah, though.
40:56
Come on, man, we're not done yet, all right?
40:58
Honestly, Aquarius could have been Poseidon.
41:02
Unless that's a Roman one. I can.
41:05
OK. OK Aquarius, you're Prometheus,
41:07
Titan, foresight and fire. Innovative, humanitarian and a
41:10
true visionary. You're always thinking ahead and
41:12
challenging the status quo. You're the one bringing new
41:14
ideas and light to humanity, even if it means rufflings and
41:17
feathers. I mean the description is
41:20
fitting. Yeah, but at what cost, right?
41:22
I could have an Artemis. Let that look.
41:24
I could have been fucking Artemis.
41:25
Legit. I love Artemis.
41:25
You're right. That is the one you love.
41:27
I forgot. All right.
41:27
Pisces. You're Poseidon, God of the sea.
41:30
Dreamy, empathetic, and deeply connected to your emotions.
41:33
You flow through life with an ethereal grace.
41:34
Your intuition is as vast and deep as the ocean itself,
41:37
boundless and ever changing. OK, now that would make sense to
41:40
be Pisces. To be a Pisces.
41:43
They threw two times in there signs.
41:46
Well, we're we'll we'll have to adjust that ourselves.
41:48
Maybe. God damn it.
41:50
God damn it. All right.
41:54
Well, do you want to hear? I hate that.
41:59
Let's move on. Since you're angry about that,
42:01
let's let Abby's. Yeah, Abby, we have obviously we
42:04
have a end of show beef. With the Zodiac.
42:09
I know. Maybe I should have started a
42:11
year. I should have.
42:13
OK, I have. I you know that I love funny
42:16
headlines. I, I what you do too.
42:19
We've done this before. I I don't even need to read the
42:22
rest of the article. The the headline should tell me
42:24
everything I need to know, OK? Or at least catch your
42:28
attention. These are actual headlines from
42:30
newspapers. OK, OK, OK.
42:34
These are so funny. Now I get rid of.
42:36
OK, first one. First one.
42:38
Federal agents raid gun shop, find weapons.
42:45
Some of these might. We've done this before.
42:48
I'm going to stop you by here when I.
42:50
Argue OK safety meeting ends in accident.
42:56
God damn it. God damn.
42:59
It county to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds.
43:09
Oh shit, that's what I don't even get.
43:11
Alton attorney accidentally sues himself.
43:16
Alton. It happened up in Alton.
43:18
Yeah. Hospitals resort to hiring
43:21
doctors. What?
43:24
Why wouldn't you be? Yep.
43:25
Physician shortage prompting move.
43:28
Administrators say well of. Course you're hiring doctors.
43:31
Yeah, I don't get that one. Let's see.
43:34
A woman falls in hospital told to call ambulance.
43:37
What now? This one, this one is a this one
43:44
is a grammatical era. Students cook and serve
43:46
grandparents. It's so comma.
43:50
I don't think that they're supposed to be, unfortunately.
43:53
I think it would be they needed the word there, cook and serve
43:55
there. Well, no, that would be the
43:56
word. It doesn't work.
43:58
Doesn't work. For cook for and serve.
44:03
Yeah. There you go.
44:03
So we're missing the preposition.
44:05
You're right. You're right.
44:06
OK. This has been your grammar
44:07
lesson of the day. There you go, X-Men, Mr. Breaks.
44:10
Silence says nothing. Oh man, planes forced to land at
44:23
airports. I like that.
44:29
I do like that there it's the headline is technically true,
44:34
but it's honestly obviously missing context, you know what I
44:37
mean? Oh, OK.
44:38
OK, 'cause it's like they're, they're probably forced to land.
44:41
Like, of course they are. It's the context.
44:44
OK, this one, you have to see the word Mississippi.
44:46
'S Mississippi's Mississippi. 'S Mississippi's literacy
44:49
program shows improvement. It's supposed to be Mississippi,
44:52
Mississippi. 'S oh boy.
44:54
Mississippi's. Threat disrupts plans to meet
44:57
about threats. Oh no.
45:07
All right, give me one more. I got two more.
45:09
I'll get two more. Most earthquake damage is caused
45:13
by shaking. OK, last one.
45:21
All right. 11 armed man applauds the kindness of strangers.
45:33
Oh man. Oh man, what?
45:36
The kind of strange. Oh my God, we got time for
45:39
anymore. No.
45:40
Yeah, OK, 'cause I have a couple.
45:42
Well, I just didn't know if you'd have anything else to get
45:44
to. What?
45:45
No, I had a license plate thing. OK, I'll tell.
45:48
Let me tell. I have a couple more.
45:50
OK? Just a couple more.
45:50
OK? US City tells residents to stop
45:53
sticking googly eyes on sculptures.
45:56
We talked about that. That what we talked about.
46:00
You're right. You're right.
46:01
I didn't delete it. And so you caught me.
46:03
You caught me on Once you caught me, I was doing so good, man.
46:08
OK. The Mafia Dons are not happy
46:11
with the quality of Gen. Z recruits.
46:14
A direct quote. The caliber.
46:15
The caliber these days is low. A miserable level.
46:23
Yeah, damn. Mafia Dons Who's interviewing
46:25
the mafia Dons on their? Are they interviewing 4 mafia
46:28
Dons or the? No, the mafia Dons are trying to
46:31
get recruits. Oh, I see.
46:33
Yeah. And they're saying that the Gen.
46:34
Z recruits are the Gen. Z recruits is terrible.
46:36
Understand. Miserable.
46:38
A miserable low. Oh, wow.
46:39
Legit. So yeah, sad, sad news when you
46:42
know Dons can't find. OK, OK, last one.
46:45
Here's my last one. This has happened in Saint
46:48
Louis. It is.
46:49
It was posted on On Cam Movie Channel 4's post Facebook posts.
46:54
OK. A second child got stuck inside
46:57
a claw machine. Not the second child this is not
47:03
happening. Second child this has.
47:05
Happened not only once, but twice a child.
47:08
Here he is. He's just in there smiling.
47:12
Yeah, he's fucking pulling things out for him.
47:14
He's getting all the toys, he's stuck inside the gloves.
47:16
This happened twice. This happened toys out in
47:18
Webster Groves. I'm dead.
47:20
Hilarious. OK, OK, well, I got another
47:23
funny thing. All right, Tell us.
47:24
So at the end of 2025, the Illinois Secretary of State,
47:28
Alexi. Genovia, Genovia, Genovia.
47:33
Yeah, Alexi Giannoulias, yes, I see his name all the time 'cause
47:36
I have to pull, pull a yes. So it's a good standing anyway.
47:38
All right, boring information, but.
47:40
Alexi Alexi they they posted a video of him reading some of the
47:47
rejected license plates. OK, so here are some of the
47:50
rejected license plates for 2020.
47:51
Five people so. You can submit your license
47:54
plate and they can be like, no, you cannot have that as a
47:58
license plate. Oh, I see, I see.
47:59
Not just because it's already been taken.
48:01
So it's. Your a personalized yes, not the
48:04
actual like design OK. So #1 we have the BBL which
48:09
apparently stands for Brazilian Butt Lift.
48:11
He says OK, which he goes, which had to be explained to me.
48:17
Alexei did. You don't need a BBL.
48:19
OK, this one. Oh, blue ballin blue.
48:24
Ballin, Nice L. UBALN Blue Ballin.
48:28
Rejected. Rejected.
48:29
OK, Unfortunate Bricked. Bricked.
48:38
Bricked spelled the whole world out word.
48:41
Apparently has nothing to do with construction.
48:44
He has nothing to. Do with construction he.
48:48
Says. I would recommend just Googling
48:50
that one. Abby but then in your in your
48:53
Google history. This one oh OK type shit type
49:00
shit TYPE type and then SHT shit oh it like there's some dumb ass
49:06
type shit oh. OK, I was like, I need that one
49:09
explained to me because I'm like I type shit all day.
49:11
I don't know what's what's wrong with that.
49:13
OK Oh my God. Apparently also a Gen.
49:16
Z thing, he says. Oh, OK, OK, she's laughing at
49:21
all this one. This is a good one.
49:27
Why was this rejected? IB Blutter's eye letter B
49:31
Pooping. I'd be pooping, I'd be pooping,
49:36
he said. OK, that was.
49:37
Pretty funny. That was pretty funny.
49:40
Why would you reject that? That's alert.
49:41
That might cause an accident because people got to get.
49:43
Close to a reasonable laugh. A classic eye cup.
49:48
Spell it ICUP. A classic.
49:52
Classic. A classic, apparently.
49:58
Apparently a 10 year old requested this one, he said.
50:01
OK, OK, I go. Oh yeah, that that's definitely
50:04
wasn't. It oh, but they rejected it.
50:06
Anyway, oh, how dare. OK, she's got another good one.
50:10
Here we go. Oh, OK, Can she say?
50:15
I'm going to say it. This one says the Prius E Prius.
50:23
E Now I'm not saying if this. Is how you refer to your Prius.
50:29
There's a show on TLC for you. Oh my God, that's that's
50:36
awesome. Why would you reject that?
50:37
This one is, SNDNUDZ said. News OK OK no thanks.
50:51
Please do not send nudes. OK Oh OK bad.
50:56
I like that one. Bad ass mom.
50:58
Bad ass mom. BDASMOMI said Ass mom.
51:01
I'll say don't. Rejected, Rejected.
51:03
Terrible, rejected. OK, this is short for bad ass
51:07
mom, he explains. I keep telling my wife to stop
51:10
requesting. This plate?
51:11
OK, that's funny. He's a comedian, man.
51:14
He needs to do some stand up, OK?
51:17
OK, SYBA. USYBAU.
51:22
Which he says. Which means shut your something.
51:25
So it's shut your bitch ass up. It's what S?
51:28
YBAU said to her. OK, I didn't know that one.
51:34
As always, go and get creative with your license plate, but
51:37
please keep it clean. Oh my gosh.
51:39
So that cracked me up that that. Cracks me up that he did a whole
51:41
video and he says them all and explains S.
51:44
YBAU he excites. Them all except for.
51:47
Bricked. Bricked.
51:49
Not I won't be explaining that one listener.
51:52
We won't either. If you want to then your Google
51:54
search you go. For it, you go for it.
51:55
Hey, leave us a comment. Do not don't.
52:00
Leave us a comment. Leave us a comment on what you
52:02
want your license plate to say. That was probably rejected.
52:05
We would like we would like her to know your personalized plate
52:08
rejections. Leave us a comment at all.
52:11
At all. Would be lovely.
52:13
Leave us, leave us your beef, you know, comment your beef.
52:15
That's true. We do want to.
52:16
We haven't had a listener beef in a hot minute because we're,
52:21
you know, we, we just don't have them.
52:23
I don't know what word to say about.
52:25
That so hit us up, hit us up with some beef.
52:26
Hit us up with some beef. We'd love to we'd love to share
52:28
not beef with us. Please don't hit me with your
52:30
beef in person. I didn't I didn't share our new
52:32
little thing. Oh my God.
52:33
Speaking of beef, if you haven't, if you haven't ever
52:36
heard of Lulu pigs, you have to go look up the Lulu pig series.
52:38
They're very, very cute. They're blind boxes.
52:40
Blind boxes are huge right now, Avi, and they're This is a
52:44
little Lulu pig who is a hamburger.
52:47
And he is a little ham. Man, he is, he's in the burger
52:50
and he's adorable and he and then when you turn the bun, the
52:55
the bun top bun pops up and his little sidekick.
52:59
Yeah, pops out cat pig. Pops out cat pig.
53:03
He's a. Little pig and a cat.
53:05
And a cat. It's the cutest freaking thing
53:09
in the world. In the world and he comes in,
53:11
what does he come in? A regular box.
53:13
Nope, he comes in a little hamburger box.
53:15
Yep, you're holding it. Upside down when I am, I keep
53:17
holding it upside down. It's a real problem.
53:19
Luckily, this is an audio podcast, not a It's Like You.
53:22
Know like when you go to like the Burger King and you get like
53:24
your burger in a box, it's a cheeseburger box or your
53:26
McDonald's, you love it. You get your chicken sandwich in
53:29
a box. Adorable.
53:29
But it's a cute little Lulu piggy hamburger and I love him.
53:33
Yes, So I'll post a pic. Yep, I like how like the little
53:37
like they're not burn marks but like they make a little pig face
53:40
on the bun too. Oh it does.
53:41
I didn't even notice that. Cuz he's got years.
53:44
It's a bit and he has the years on the bun.
53:46
So cute little sesame. The Lulu pigs are adorable.
53:49
You can get them on Aliexpress cheap.
53:51
I told you that we're moving branches eventually and I don't
53:57
think I told you that my new branch will be 6 minutes away
54:00
from the West County Mall. And so I was telling Sam that
54:04
and I was. She's like, I have to Venmo you
54:07
to go get me things. And that's where.
54:08
The pop Marts are no, no, no, I'm not going to do that.
54:10
She goes, Mom will. I was like, yeah, but she won't
54:14
send me down there to get you. What?
54:15
What are you, the little guy's? Skull Panda, Skull panda.
54:17
I love them so much. Yeah.
54:19
She's gonna make me get a a Venmo so that I can go down
54:22
there and get her. A skull panda, they got the the
54:24
pop Mart is who makes all the a lot, not all of them, a lot of
54:27
these blind boxes. And I see they're they're
54:30
geniuses. Geniuses because they're making
54:33
a lot of money. Indeed.
54:34
Because if you get your you get your blind box and if you don't
54:38
like it, guess what? Then you turn around and buy
54:40
another one like geniuses. Gotcha.
54:44
Yeah, I gotcha. See what if we did that for our
54:46
for our podcast, You. We're going to release a
54:49
podcast, but you don't know which one you're going to get.
54:54
It's not very good. It's not a very good mark, you
54:56
know thing because I would have to release multiple a week.
54:58
Right. And and that's exhausting.
55:01
Although there would be weeks that I could release the same
55:03
one over and over because you would get the same one
55:06
sometimes. In your in your blind box,
55:09
that's true. But maybe not.
55:11
Maybe not, but maybe not. We'll we'll think about it.
55:14
We'll think about it. We'll think about it.
55:15
That's what the merch will be. The blind boxes will have
55:20
they're all be the same except a little bit like one that's
55:23
different and you have to buy a whole bunch of them.
55:24
That way I only have to make one cheeseburger for the most part
55:28
and then there will be 1 like golden cheeseburger and you
55:31
gotta buy them all. To get golden.
55:33
Exactly. But they're all because it's the
55:35
special. Then I don't have to make 6.
55:36
I just keep, you know, if you know anything about blind boxes,
55:39
that's the special. The special, Yeah.
55:41
And so they always have one or the secret.
55:44
They always have one that's like a secret and you don't know what
55:47
it is. Yeah.
55:48
And they're worth more and there's more special and
55:51
whatever. It's a scam.
55:53
It's a Ponzi scheme. It's a.
55:55
Scam. It's a Ponzi scheme.
55:57
So, but it just gives, it just makes us spend our money and it
56:00
does. Yep, it does, but it's cute as
56:03
hell. So you know what?
56:04
We spend the money. Well, not me personally, I'm not
56:10
me, but I'm I, I. Spend my money on other things
56:12
for sure. Well, yeah, everybody spends
56:14
money on whatever they think is fun.
56:16
Like the water bill? And that's true too.
56:17
That's true too. What do you want to talk about?
56:21
Oh, I got a story I can tell you.
56:22
OK. All right, you ready?
56:24
OK, Liv and I were discussing that idols keep having these
56:29
free fan meets, but they're only having them in Texas or New York
56:33
or California. The fuck?
56:36
OK. Highly populated dense
56:38
populations. Yeah, exactly.
56:40
OK, Boo. Where they can see the most
56:42
people. Exactly.
56:42
OK, we're. Frisco, TX.
56:43
Is that this? Not.
56:46
Yeah, it's not even that. It's not even like Dallas or
56:48
Houston. Or anything.
56:49
Yeah, and it's gonna be slippery as hell.
56:50
And Chris, go Tescos. Frisco and Chris Chris go
56:53
Tescos. Anyway, she's telling me this,
56:56
OK? And I'm like, yeah, what the
56:58
hell? Why don't they come to Chicago?
57:00
It's just as big and busy. OK, so that's what I said and
57:04
Liv says. Yeah, like my ass.
57:05
And I licked my ass and I said I'm.
57:12
Not not sure I would. Advertise that my ass is busy.
57:17
OK, Like I had like a biggest, biggest one thing and she says
57:20
just call my ass. Just call my ass Chicago.
57:22
Now I've got that Chicago ass big and busy.
57:29
Sam's like. Chicago ass.
57:33
So we're just. In there, no.
57:35
Nothing, she says. Chicago ass big and busy.
57:40
Did I tell you? Did I ever tell you the story of
57:42
Little Richard? No, no.
57:45
I. Just heard another let's go
57:49
think about her ass cuz I got another story.
57:51
Anyway, go ahead, listen to Erica and I.
57:54
Are at work. Oh.
57:56
I think we're going to tell me the story.
57:57
Yes. And then I had to confirm the
57:58
facts. Yes.
57:59
OK, so you got the facts. I got the facts.
58:01
OK, just the facts, ma'am. Just the facts, ma'am, So.
58:03
We were. OK.
58:06
We were trying to come up with, like, fake names for each other,
58:10
like other nicknames. And I said, well, we could call
58:13
her Rick because she's Erica. OK, OK.
58:17
And then somebody said, well, what we call you?
58:19
And I said big, GAIL big. GAIL, because it's Abigail.
58:24
OK, Big GAIL. And then I said, I'm big, GAIL.
58:27
And you're a little Rick. And I was like.
58:30
Little. Richard.
58:35
It's a big gay Little Richard every once in a while.
58:37
I'll refer to her as Little Richard.
58:43
That's any idea why people will be like why you call her that?
58:48
Oh my God, that's awesome. They'll be like Little Richard
58:55
Little. Richard Oh, that's that's
58:58
awesome. That's awesome.
58:59
I like. That so I'm I'm big.
59:00
It's where you know the classic buddy cop duo of big gal and
59:04
little. Richard, that's.
59:07
Awesome. I love it.
59:09
Oh my God. You know, I thought you were
59:10
like wanting like a code name for like, if you're out together
59:13
and somebody. Yeah, sometimes.
59:15
OK, It's like I've. Never had to come up.
59:16
Before my, my friend, my friend and I when we were young, we, we
59:19
were like, we got a code name. So if some guy comes up to you
59:21
at the bar like on your college days or whatever, and you don't
59:24
want to give them your number or anything you got to you tell
59:26
them they asked your name. So we both had the same code
59:30
name. We were both Mabel.
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I don't know why. We're both.
59:34
Mabel. We were both Mabel.
59:35
I don't. I remember us being Mabel.
59:37
So yeah, we were Mabel together. Mabel together.
59:40
Yeah, that was our code name. I'm Mabel, so is my wife.
59:45
This is true. You should have gone with me.
59:46
It's true. Oh my God, did I?
59:49
Did we tell the story about your big ears?
59:54
Somebody at your work? Somebody, a Co worker told you
59:57
that you have big ears. You know what?
59:59
And I yeah, she did. She did.
1:00:01
And then you told me and I was offended because we have the
1:00:03
same ears. I don't have big ears.
1:00:06
I was like, excuse. Me, I did.
1:00:08
I sent. Her so we compared and we agreed
1:00:10
we do not have big ears but I did say my Co worker her name is
1:00:15
Elise. We skipped the Co worker phase,
1:00:17
went straight to siblings and and I sent I sent her a thing
1:00:21
the other day that was like the get your finger out of my my
1:00:25
face. It's like it's like 2 coworkers
1:00:27
yelling. That's us, she's on KC.
1:00:30
That's awesome, but she, she's a culprit, she said.
1:00:33
You had big ears. Well, she had said to my manager
1:00:37
she was, hey, I need to talk to you later.
1:00:39
I got a thing for you and no, thank you basically, which is
1:00:43
the thing that I always say every time she has news.
1:00:45
I'm like, no, you're better not gonna do that.
1:00:47
And so she goes, OK, Abby, she's all through my manager.
1:00:51
OK. And so my manager sends me this.
1:00:53
You were cracking up about it. So I I messaged her and I go
1:00:58
heard you were talking shit and what not.
1:01:01
And she goes. She goes.
1:01:03
I knew you'd. Hear that all the way over
1:01:04
there? And I said yeah, because I got
1:01:07
spies everywhere. And she goes.
1:01:09
I just thought it was because you're big ears.
1:01:13
Roast me roasted. But but she's wrong.
1:01:15
Because we decided we have completely normal sized ears.
1:01:17
Normal. Here's the thing.
1:01:19
Normal sized ears. Cut to later.
1:01:20
We're in a meeting, OK, And somebody's turning around
1:01:24
writing on the whiteboard. I've got the camera up.
1:01:26
OK. And so I can see the room.
1:01:27
The guy's writing on the whiteboard and she's sitting
1:01:29
right next to the camera. So I can't see because she's in
1:01:31
front of the camera. So I, I type away, Move your big
1:01:34
head. You're walking the camera.
1:01:36
I can't see this vital drawing that's being put on the
1:01:38
whiteboard right now. It's a dig, so then she's up.
1:01:42
For the camera and the guy who's writing it who is not a part of
1:01:49
this, like joking. Group turns around like stares
1:01:51
at her like what the fuck can I can I help you?
1:01:53
Do you need assistance? My exact.
1:01:55
Message Do you have the PE? Like my message had actually.
1:01:57
Been move your head. I can't see this drawing.
1:02:00
Oh. OK, so he never said big head,
1:02:02
correct? And so he turns.
1:02:03
Around and he says to her. You, you.
1:02:06
What are you? You know what's going on?
1:02:08
And she goes, oh, Abby just told me to move.
1:02:09
My big head out of the way. So she said it herself.
1:02:14
She did. She did.
1:02:16
Well, when you told me, I said we do not have big ears.
1:02:21
Correct. I was offended because we have
1:02:22
the same ears. You have my ears, I said.
1:02:24
But I do have the biggest earlobes in the world, and it's
1:02:30
the world. And Abby's comment was?
1:02:33
Well, I don't think. They're bad.
1:02:34
I don't think we need to like lock you up in the Cathedral of
1:02:37
Notre Dame or anything. Notre Dame.
1:02:50
So thank God my ear earlobes. Aren't.
1:02:52
That hideous and. Big and I don't have to be
1:02:54
locked up with with Quasimodo. Thank God.
1:02:58
Thank God for thank God for me. Thank God for me.
1:03:01
OK, I think we do have enough. OK all.
1:03:04
Right, I don't know about you guys, but after.
1:03:05
This. I'm going to need some serious
1:03:07
beef and some serious sandwich minus the sport.
1:03:10
Bye. Bye.