Latest / Aired Out / Gino (Part 2) - drugs, mental health, homelessness, life on the streets, recovery, faith

Transcript

Gino (Part 2) - drugs, mental health, homelessness, life on the streets, recovery, faith · Aired Out

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, all right, gang, I think we're I think we're back.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: I think most people, oh Ryans just fine.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, here you are. Yeah.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: I think that's uh, it's probably better. It's some some
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: audio snaffoos on that last goo, But what we were
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: saying there at the end is that I think some regular,
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: real conversation like this needs to happen more often, and
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: I would love to be part of that with you.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: I would love to be part of that with others.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: You know, Dan moland is over Enough Ministries, is such
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: a great dude, and he has had these these types
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: of conversations with with people that are having a hard
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: time and a lot of the homeless. And there's a
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: homeless population that sometimes we don't realize. Yeah we don't realize.
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: We sometimes we see them, but most we don't. And
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: where they live and where they sleep, we don't see that.
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: Well I don't see it, but they tell you about it.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: And you've been homeless.
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: I've been homeless. I lived out up supped apart bench
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: for a while and then I ended up in this Maridan.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Okay, how long ago was that?
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: About ten years ago?
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: Okay? How long were you good to see him?
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: About a year?
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: And then was that kind of the beginning of you
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: transitioning out of this lifestyle into sobriety, into self sufficiency.
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: Getting an apartment was at the beginning kind of.
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: That was the beginning. But also, like.
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: You know, and I think a lot about my son too,
• 1:57
  Speaker 4: you know, where he could have a place to visit me,
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: you know, hang out. And so I, you know, kind
• 2:09
  Speaker 4: of picked myself up and said, where do I go
• 2:11
  Speaker 4: from here?
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: What did I do? Just one kid kill John? Okay?
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: And so I did meet out and I got a
• 2:21
  Speaker 4: hold of Washington County Mental Health.
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: I got on meds.
• 2:27
  Speaker 4: Going through the program of Sunrise, which I've been going ten.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: Years, Sunrise Berry Street, Montfillier. Yes, hey, let's go over
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: there hangout sometimes.
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that'd be cool.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Do you want to do that? Yeah, let's do that.
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you know Penny Mine.
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: Penny's amazing, Yes, he is. Penny.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: You know, I went there quite a while ago and
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: was streaming live and got a chance to chat with
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: Penny and see the kitchen and see just everything they've
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: got going on there. I mean, it's just such a
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: fantastic organ.
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: Yes it is.
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: Let's go over to hang out with Penny. One of
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: these days.
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: Well you did that interview with Penny and Heather that.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Long time ago. Yeah, yeah, let's do it again. We share.
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: All right, that's great. I'm gonna send Penny an email.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: We're gonna make that happen. Okay, Okay, But you know, listen,
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: I gotta ask you. Did you get a chance to
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: see Brandon Carbo and I sit down?
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Yes?
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: I did together, Yes I did.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: What was your takeaway from that? You know, is there
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: any hope for him?
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: I think there is.
• 3:39
  Speaker 4: I met Brandon about ten years ago. He lived next
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: door to me, my son, he.
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: Had a job, he had an apartment, and.
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: I'm telling you, when he's not in that situation, he
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: is an amazing kid.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: You mean when he's sober, When he's sober.
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: And clean, Okay, he would do it.
• 4:00
  Speaker 4: But the fact that I was sitting there one day
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: with a bunch of my family and Brandon was here
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: and the guy passed to study know the Brandon you
• 4:10
  Speaker 4: needed some help move with file cabinets. Brandon went right
• 4:14
  Speaker 4: over there.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: We're not even.
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: Hesitating to help him.
• 4:18
  Speaker 4: He was clean and he was sober, and at that moment,
• 4:22
  Speaker 4: I was proud.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: You know, everybody has it rough.
• 4:27
  Speaker 4: Like I was telling you earlier, I mean our drugs, whiskey, vodka, beer.
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: You've smoked a few cigarettes too.
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, a few?
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: A few.
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: Guy about fight me.
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: But you know, and like I was saying earlier, you know,
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: a lot of us do not know the background of
• 4:57
  Speaker 4: some of these who are homeless or have an addiction.
• 5:01
  Speaker 4: I started because when I was younger, you know, I
• 5:06
  Speaker 4: went through a lot that I didn't understand why that
• 5:10
  Speaker 4: was happening, you know, with the physical, sexual, mental, emotional abuse.
• 5:17
  Speaker 4: So the only thing that I could do is do
• 5:21
  Speaker 4: kills and stuff to get rid of that awful feeling.
• 5:26
  Speaker 4: And I know that when I say with my family, family, friends,
• 5:34
  Speaker 4: you know, some are homeless, some have their own place,
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: but they still have a little bit of that addiction,
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: A little bit of the situation is where do I
• 5:43
  Speaker 4: go from here?
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And I.
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: Try to help.
• 5:48
  Speaker 4: I listen, and I think I have a lot of
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: respect to them, and they have respect for me. I
• 5:55
  Speaker 4: always want to be kind to them. I want to
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: care about them. Like I was saying earlier, I saw
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: someone last year I had flippops on and in the
• 6:06
  Speaker 4: straps are broken.
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: I had just bought in these new pair of sneakers.
• 6:10
  Speaker 4: My first day wearing them, I took them off, gave
• 6:13
  Speaker 4: them to the girl, and I walked home the socks.
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: I have fed people. I have given them money, you know,
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: and my.
• 6:23
  Speaker 4: Family friends know that I can't do it all the time,
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: and I think what it is it is not so
• 6:29
  Speaker 4: much that, but I'm the person that sits and I listen.
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: I take everything they say to my heart.
• 6:39
  Speaker 4: And yes, sometimes it does bring back stuff that I
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: went through, But I think what I've been through is
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: kind of like helping them, pushing them a little bit
• 6:51
  Speaker 4: closer and maybe trying to get help. And I want
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: to let my friends and everything there is help.
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: If you don't know where to go or what vote
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: to take, asked me, I've done through that.
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 7:06
  Speaker 3: It's one of my own family members. You know, we
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: got Valley Best.
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: Washington County member houses, places in New Hampshire, Plamont, Charlestown, Gary,
• 7:16
  Speaker 4: New Hampshire, and other.
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: Places in mass.
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: If you don't know how to reach out to these places,
• 7:24
  Speaker 4: let me know I've done it.
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: This heading United Church. Yes, there's enough ministries, there's Capstone.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: I mean these are all right here within a couple
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: hundred yards of where we're sitting right now. There's so
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: many resources, Patty. But here's the thing, and we've we
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: were talking about this earlier, is that, man, it's like,
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: no matter no matter how many services are out there,
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: you have to want it badly enough. You have to
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: want sobriety badly enough. It doesn't matter how badly your
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: friends and family want you to be successful or sober
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: or you have to, but you have to get to
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: the point where you want to do it badly enough
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: for yourself. You can want to do it for yourself
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: but still not be able to, but you have to
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: want it badly enough. It's got to be like, you've
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: got to You've got to find wherever that bottom is,
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: where you're you're either good, let's be.
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: Frank here, Okay, You're either gonna die or you're gonna live.
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: And if you're gonna live, what's the quality of your
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: life going to be?
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: Like?
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: Is it going to be You're just going to continue.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: On the on this path, on this dark path, which
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: is a slow spiral.
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: To death. Are you going to overdo? Are you you
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: know how long it's not a sustainable road? How long
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: you're going to be on it? You got you got
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: off of it.
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: Nine years makes.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: Nine years.
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: You know something, you're you know what it takes.
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: It takes our whole life. It takes it. You have
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: to all life to get your ship together. You know
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: what I mean. I mean we all we all have
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: room for improvement. You know.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: It's like, but the fact that you're you're nine years sober,
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: you got your life together, You're still working at it.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: You still.
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: Are connected to the streets, and you're still connected with
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: this community that needs so much help. Drug addicts, people
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: that that don't have jobs, people that are homeless.
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: You're still connected to them.
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: I want to I want to mistet them on my love.
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: I want to care about them, I want to help them.
• 10:03
  Speaker 4: I mean, I'm telling you, addiction is one of the
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: roughest things that.
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: You can ever you know, overcome.
• 10:14
  Speaker 4: I relapsed so many times, but you know you have
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: to have someone there saying you can do it. I
• 10:24
  Speaker 4: didn't have that. I had my son, but you know,
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: I didn't have the resources that I needed, and yet
• 10:35
  Speaker 4: I tried to convince suicide. I'm not gonna I'm gonna
• 10:38
  Speaker 4: be totally honest. I don't want to sugar coat my
• 10:42
  Speaker 4: life and what I've been through. I burned, I've cot
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: I run where nobody can ever find me because I
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: didn't know how.
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: Lost I was inside of Maine.
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: To overcome everything that I was doing, I've hit rock bottom.
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: But you know, you have to sometimes put yourself up,
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: whether it's just call it the hootstraps and say, hey,
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: I want to change. I want to be the person
• 11:18
  Speaker 4: who I want to.
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: Be, to show what life is really about.
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: There is hopes, you have your dreams, but you just
• 11:29
  Speaker 4: need a little bit of help.
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: And I want to see this happen.
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: You know. And everybody tells me I have such a
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: big heart, and I do not so much that, but
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: I've been there so many times.
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: I almost died a couple of times.
• 11:51
  Speaker 4: And I'm telling you what, it is the scariest thing
• 11:55
  Speaker 4: to ever experience in a lifetime.
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: You come back to life, Yes, were you narcand a.
• 12:04
  Speaker 4: Couple of times I've been in psycho words, I'm not
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: gonna lie.
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: I've been in hospitals, you know. And some people think, not.
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: Everybody, that it might not work for them. But you
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: have to try. Try three times, try four times, try
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: as many times that you need.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: Give yourself a little break. If you do relap, yes, right, yes.
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: If you need to get away for three or four
• 12:33
  Speaker 4: days because you re laughs.
• 12:36
  Speaker 3: Call the screeners. Can I give them a number?
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: Please call it screeners two to nine five ninety one.
• 12:47
  Speaker 3: Talk to them. They will help you. If you need
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: to go up to the hospital for a few days, go.
• 12:54
  Speaker 4: Get away from everything that is bothering you.
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: You know. And I don't know J D. Green, you know,
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: I get you know.
• 13:06
  Speaker 4: I don't think I get frustrated, but I get concerned.
• 13:10
  Speaker 4: Some of the people that od and have died were
• 13:13
  Speaker 4: friends of mine. I don't want to see that happen again,
• 13:20
  Speaker 4: you know. And being with homeless people other people.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: Ninety eight Some of them.
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: Are great people. They've show me why, they showed me care.
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: And before we all split away, we hug.
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: Each other and tell each other we love them.
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: And you sit on these steps often and have real conversations.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: With people, which is really, yes, remarkable that you do that.
• 13:56
  Speaker 4: I don't want to give up. I don't want to
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: give up on anybody. I want to sit on this sting,
• 14:01
  Speaker 4: but the next three years, I'm not giving up.
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: I don't want to give up. People give up. I mean,
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: I know how it feels I don't want to do that.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: I'm so glad you are connected with Heading. I'm so
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: gad glad you're connected with Pastor Ray. I gotta get
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: you guys on the air. I mean, I think the
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: three of us need to sit down, you know. I mean,
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: you're dialed in tight. You know, you know what's going
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: on on the streets. And the fact that you are
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: testimony to that you've been there, you've been there, and
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: you're still here. You're not running away from You're not
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: running away from these folks, and.
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: I'm not gonna you know.
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: And the days that, like I said, when you know
• 15:02
  Speaker 4: everybody you know needs to leave, they'll say some of
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: them call me mom, which is fine. The kids they're
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: in the twenties, and they'll say, you're gonna be here
• 15:11
  Speaker 4: again them all the same time, every day, every day I.
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: Look care for training, snow and sleeping. I'm here.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: And I let it take that.
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: J D.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: Green, I've known you for a long time. I love you.
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: I love you too, and I think.
• 15:32
  Speaker 4: What you're doing is amazing too, not just me sitting
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: me at talking. You're putting it out there on the air,
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: and that's what people need and I think you are
• 15:43
  Speaker 4: the one of the greatest guys I have ever met.
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: I think you're you're one of the greatest ladies I've
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: ever met. Too. What you're doing is remarkable. I mean,
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: who else is doing that? I don't know.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: I mean, like I said, Dan Malind, over it enough ministries,
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: has has really been connected with the homeless and pastor Ray.
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: Yes, Josh Fortier, over it enough.
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: I mean, great people, but we need we need more
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: people like you who have been on this dark road
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: of addiction, of homelessness, of suicide, of all of these things.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: And to think that you're nine years on the clean side,
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: I mean you've really set such a profound example that
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: there is hope. Bullshire is hope no matter who you are,
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: no matter what you've done, no matter what you're currently doing,
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: no matter how many bad decisions you're making daily, hourly, weekly, whatever,
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: you can get rid of that label of being a scumbag,
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: of being a crackhead. I mean, there's so many labels, man,
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: there's so many. I mean, just open up Facebook and
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: you'll see them all, you know. I mean, listen, there's
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: plenty of people that are making really bad decisions around here,
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: and it's not just it's not just Barry, it's Bill.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: It's everywhere. Look at Burlington, man, It's like, yeah, we'll.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: I'm hearing more and more people say, you know where
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Burlington is.
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: It's right next to Vermont. I'm hearing that more often
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: than ever before.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: But it's like, yeah, we got our problems in this city,
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: but every city's got its problems.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: Every city has its Brandon Carbos. And you know, I I.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: Don't know, man, I see something in that guy's eyes that.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: It's a sad situation. I know he uses, but there's
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: something in his eyes that tell me that.
• 18:03
  Speaker 3: He wants to. He wants it bad enough to.
• 18:05
  Speaker 4: You know, Brandon. I've known Brandon for ten years. He
• 18:10
  Speaker 4: walked yet in his own apartment. He helped anybody that
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: you can help.
• 18:16
  Speaker 3: I do love him. I'm not gonna say I don't.
• 18:18
  Speaker 3: He was like my own kid. He came to me
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: just a tongue.
• 18:24
  Speaker 4: Brandon, if you listen, I know you could do it, honey.
• 18:27
  Speaker 4: I've seen you help people. I've seen you care about people.
• 18:32
  Speaker 4: I've seen you rough with us.
• 18:35
  Speaker 3: Please.
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: You know, Brandon's got to get real with himself, yes,
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: and he's got to start seeing the light and finding
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: a way off the road that he's on and not
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: just say well, this is who I am, So this
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: is who I have to continue to be.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: Well he doesn't have to.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: He doesn't have to. Yeah, I know, I'm I mean,
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: I know that. And all of this is easier said
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: than done.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: I mean, all we're saying here is there's a lot
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: of one plus one equals to stuff. And I know that,
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: I know that there's a lot more to this. And man,
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: we could sit and peel back the onion.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: For weeks and weeks and weeks every day.
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: Every state's got its problems, Every community has its problems,
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: Every city has its problems. You know, I met a
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: guy yesterday who was referred to as the branded Carbo
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: of Randolph.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: You know, I've met a guy in Montpellier who's the same.
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: But man, it's like, there's so much good, good stuff
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: going on in Barry, and there's a good stuff going
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: on in this community and the outskirts of it. Man,
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: it's like, yeah, there's problems. There's problems that the state
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: is not winning. The war on drugs is something that
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: I think Vermont and every state in the nation is losing.
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's just my opinion. I mean it's like
• 20:15
  Speaker 2: all you got to do is turn your TV on
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: or turn your phone on it you'll see that. I mean,
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: it's everywhere, is it? Is it a pandemic? You bet
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: your asset is.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: You know, you know, I just.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: I just heard that Carlos Perez is going to be
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: out of prison in a couple of weeks. He was
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: another guy, a local guy, Montfilier Berry, a carassive, super aggressive.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: Pan handling and just a lot of bad ship.
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: And you know, where will he go when when he's
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: let out of prison in a couple of weeks, when
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: he's released, where will he go? Will we see him
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: back here in Bury?
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: You know?
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: Will he really beat somebody up right in that, right
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: in that that walked through over by by subway, right
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: across the street from us, Well, and he beat someone.
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: Up again like you did over there? I don't know,
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: you know, it's.
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: You know, are all the cameras that we're going to
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: get here and buried.
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: Going to bring more of this to light? I don't know.
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 21:29
  Speaker 4: Somebody asked me the other day, you at the streets,
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: you're not scared?
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: I said, no, I'm not scared. I have my friends,
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: my family, and.
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: They've even told me that they have my back because
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: I show them the.
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: Things that they need. They need loud, they need care,
• 21:51
  Speaker 3: and they need kindness, they need even just a little
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: bit of help.
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: To get them through the day. I rode to a
• 22:03
  Speaker 4: girl last week, right down here by the library. Yes,
• 22:08
  Speaker 4: she's an addict, wet. We stood there probably fifteen twenty
• 22:14
  Speaker 4: minutes talking had a cigarette, and she was coherent and it.
• 22:20
  Speaker 3: Was awesome to see.
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: So after we got done talking, we hugged each other.
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: She cried on my shoulders. And I don't know if
• 22:33
  Speaker 4: there was so much that she felt that love for me,
• 22:38
  Speaker 4: or she's crying because she knows she needs to help.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: Or maybe a little bit about.
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: Yes, I lit a little bit of help, and hope
• 22:49
  Speaker 4: goes the wrong way in my eyes. And like I said,
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: even if I have to sit here, you know, months,
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: a year to years, three years, I'm not gonna let
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: them down.
• 23:04
  Speaker 3: I'm here. Talk to me, just say, we can tell stories,
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: we can laugh, tell jokes. You're here, and you get
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: them away from yes, the fear.
• 23:20
  Speaker 4: Maybe within themselves, the loss they have inside themselves. I've
• 23:26
  Speaker 4: been there on park benches and I'm not gonna lie
• 23:30
  Speaker 4: I stole. I've never broke into any businesses or houses.
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: I would walk.
• 23:35
  Speaker 4: Into a store, you know, grab something to eat when
• 23:39
  Speaker 4: Almas look in, grab the water.
• 23:41
  Speaker 3: I'm not gonna deny it. It is very hard. I'm
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: not condemning anybody. I don't do that.
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: I don't judge.
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: I'm just here and I want to be here. My choice.
• 23:58
  Speaker 3: I don't have to be here, but it's my.
• 24:00
  Speaker 4: Choice to be here to help, even if it's just
• 24:07
  Speaker 4: the littlest thing.
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: A year ago, there.
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: Was a family going by. I don't know if they
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: were homeless. I don't judge, and I'm sitting here.
• 24:18
  Speaker 3: The little boys about four.
• 24:19
  Speaker 4: Years old, and he was in forty pajamas, adorable. I
• 24:24
  Speaker 4: was sitting here having an eye coffee and eating a
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: donnut and he's standing there going like this, looking at me.
• 24:31
  Speaker 3: I put my stuff down.
• 24:32
  Speaker 4: I went into the smoke shop, apple juice and donuts
• 24:36
  Speaker 4: and gave.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: Them to that little boy. He came over, sat with
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: me and we had breakfast.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: That's the real deal right there.
• 24:47
  Speaker 3: Now.
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: I don't know if they were homeless, and maybe he
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: was just hungry a child, and I I said, I'm
• 25:00
  Speaker 4: not rich I'm not by means I'm on disability, but
• 25:06
  Speaker 4: if I have it, I want to try and feed them.
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: I gave another kid a couple of years ago.
• 25:13
  Speaker 4: I just bought my son a brand new pair of sneakers,
• 25:15
  Speaker 4: and of course mama got the wrong size. I had
• 25:19
  Speaker 4: him in my backpack.
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: And I was on the way to the Dollar General
• 25:22
  Speaker 3: to return them and get my money back.
• 25:25
  Speaker 4: Another kid I know came over, sat with me and said,
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: I'm mom. I was going with smelling and said. I
• 25:32
  Speaker 4: looked down and he had just about nothing left of
• 25:35
  Speaker 4: his sneakers. I asked him what size, and took ten
• 25:40
  Speaker 4: the sneaker for ten and a half, took them on
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: my bag, said here, now you put.
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: Those on, take those ribbing ones off, and go fill
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: them in the trash.
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: You know can't. And it's not the big things that
• 25:57
  Speaker 4: make these people feel good. It's the little those things
• 26:01
  Speaker 4: just somebody.
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: Can do for them.
• 26:04
  Speaker 4: And I think that's why they do show me a
• 26:09
  Speaker 4: lot of respect.
• 26:10
  Speaker 3: And I love that because I show them. I don't,
• 26:15
  Speaker 3: you know, look at it.
• 26:18
  Speaker 4: Or say I'm better than them, because I'm not. I'm human,
• 26:22
  Speaker 4: just like everybody else.
• 26:26
  Speaker 3: I'll be here.
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: That's a great and that's what an attitude. I mean,
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: what a way, what a what a perspective to live.
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: I think more of us need to think like that,
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: need to believe, not just think like that, but really
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: need to believe what you just said, like in their soul.
• 26:46
  Speaker 3: Well they have to believe in themselves too. You know,
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: we're not.
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: You and I are not trying to say that, we're
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: being real that we know that.
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: There's a population here in our city that is making
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: bad decisions. Yes, yes, personal bad decisions, using drugs, breaking
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: into places, panhandling, causing harm, causing stress.
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: I live it all the time, all the time, JB,
• 27:23
  Speaker 3: all the time.
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: Is Bury you in your opinion? Is it a safe
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: city to walk around?
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: I walk around every day and I do feel safe
• 27:35
  Speaker 4: because I know, Like I said, you know, my family
• 27:43
  Speaker 4: that sit here with me every day, they have my
• 27:47
  Speaker 4: back because of what I'm doing for them. And they
• 27:52
  Speaker 4: told me that, they said, do you know you know
• 27:55
  Speaker 4: you walk up and down the street, you see us,
• 27:57
  Speaker 4: you know we.
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: Do that little can I sell you? Yes? I love
• 28:03
  Speaker 3: your brother, you know, and it can be amazing for
• 28:09
  Speaker 3: these people, you know, just good by shake their hand anything,
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: let them feel.
• 28:17
  Speaker 4: There were people out there that care and love them,
• 28:21
  Speaker 4: and maybe it might be in the right step for them,
• 28:26
  Speaker 4: and maybe.
• 28:26
  Speaker 3: They don't feel bad and that's why they're giving up.
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: When Carbo walked into the cereal, he extended his hand
• 28:38
  Speaker 2: to me.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: And looked at the ground, and I said, no, no, no,
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: it doesn't work like that.
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: Man, you extend your hand to somebody, you look at him,
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: look me in the eye. And he did, but you'd
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: only look at me in the eye for a second
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: and then he'd looked back down again.
• 29:07
  Speaker 4: My Louki have asked me that if he was using
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: that day, and I said, you know, I'm not there.
• 29:13
  Speaker 3: I'm not gonna get down. I'm not gonna judge because
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: I don't have that right. You know.
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: He went on there and said what he had to say,
• 29:21
  Speaker 4: and Brandon, eye hold, you know, and prayer that you.
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: Do the stuff that you said you wanted to do. Yeah,
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: you know, it's you know, And I'm never gonna and
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: I'm not gonna.
• 29:37
  Speaker 4: Push him away. When he sees me down the street,
• 29:40
  Speaker 4: he says, hey, mom comes.
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: Home and gives me a hug. You know, did that
• 29:46
  Speaker 3: make my day or did that make his dad?
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: That's a good question.
• 29:53
  Speaker 4: Does it make anybody's day when they come up to
• 29:56
  Speaker 4: me and do that lit you know, show my brother, God,
• 30:00
  Speaker 4: is it real?
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: Is it real? You know?
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: I believe Gino that, uh, there's hope for anybody, no
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: matter what their story is, what their past is, what
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: they're doing, what they're doing right now, what they're doing,
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: probably what they're going to do tomorrow. I mean, even
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: if it's bad decisions.
• 30:22
  Speaker 4: Were not that can happen to anybody, even me. I
• 30:24
  Speaker 4: can wake up tomorrow morning and say, oh I need
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: a drink. You know, it could be anybody. I mean
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: like when we were talking, I did an interview with
• 30:35
  Speaker 4: I think it was Bernie Sanders years agoing to being
• 30:39
  Speaker 4: and about me being in the Homer shelter. And I
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: was there and I said, no worry, yes, and I said,
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: you know what, it can happen to anybody, a doctor,
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: a lawyer, a nurse, a judge, anybody.
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: No matter what your socio economic class is. That's right, Well,
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: human beings are all only have the ability to get
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: addicted to anything, gambling, sex, drugs.
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: I'm addicted to rock and rolls. That's a whole other podcast.
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's right though, you know, and we try
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: to teach our kids, you know, I mean Sweethearts and
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: Heroes is going to be on with.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: Me on Wednesday. I can't wait to chat with them.
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: But we try to teach our kids, you know, get
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: addicted to something that's that's good for you. You know,
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: even if it's you know you want to see, you
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: want to see kids. You want to see kids addicted.
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: Go some Saturday or Sunday up to Bokee Brothers Motocross
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: up in North Barnett and you'll see little kids that
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: are addicted to dirt bikes and motocross and getting dirty
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: and having fun and getting hurt and getting back up
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: and getting swinging the leg. That sounds like going out,
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: Well still is me and I'm fifty four, but it's like,
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: you know, that's teach our kids to get get addicted
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: to something that's good for them, even if it's a
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: little bit of adrenaline.
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: You know why I got here now.
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: Listen, you know we're we're not going to save everybody.
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: You're not going to save everybody.
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: Heading church isn't gonna save can say one baby, that's it,
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: That's exactly it. Baby steps, baby steps, baby steps. You
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: don't you want to see someone in your family here
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: in the city of Barry have a fulfilled life. Yes,
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: that has turned around and seen the light like you have.
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: You want to see just one, just one, two, if
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: you're lucky, that's right. Three would be a massive victory.
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: That's what you're doing with peer ministries, with the heading church, Yes,
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: but outside of the church, even if the church didn't exist,
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: that's still what you're doing.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: Yes, no matter what, because.
• 33:21
  Speaker 3: I started doing it before I became a member.
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: Yes, you're doing that because you're alive. Yes, that's the
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: bottom line. You don't have a church or anyone telling
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: you that you need to do this. You're doing this
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: because it's who you are. It's something that's primal to you.
• 33:40
  Speaker 3: I guess keep in my heart.
• 33:42
  Speaker 4: You know, when I walk, I don't live that by,
• 33:45
  Speaker 4: but when I come along this corner, I say, I
• 33:48
  Speaker 4: wonder if my family's here.
• 33:50
  Speaker 3: I wonder if they need me today.
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: I wonder if I'm going to lose another one.
• 33:53
  Speaker 3: I'm going to lose another one. You know?
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: And there how many friends? Yeah, how many have you lived? Well?
• 34:01
  Speaker 3: I think I knew about four of them that have
• 34:05
  Speaker 3: passed in the last couple of weeks. You know, and
• 34:09
  Speaker 3: I try to help. I talked.
• 34:11
  Speaker 4: I even let them, couple of them come and.
• 34:13
  Speaker 3: Clean my house.
• 34:15
  Speaker 4: It didn't matter to me that they were adding the
• 34:18
  Speaker 4: addictional they were homeless.
• 34:20
  Speaker 3: I'm the main I'll give you something to do.
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: Money.
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: I gave them money because they helped me. What they
• 34:31
  Speaker 4: did with the money athletes, I don't know.
• 34:34
  Speaker 3: But it made me feel good in my heart and
• 34:40
  Speaker 3: then my soul. I was able to do that. And
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: I'm being real.
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: I know you're being real. We need more people like you,
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: but we also need to as parents, as business owners.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: I mean, we also need to keep our eyes wide open. Yes,
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: we need to protect ourselves, that's right. We need to
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: protect our family, and we need to be.
• 35:08
  Speaker 3: Aware of our surroundings anywhere we go.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: Our surroundings. Yeah, no matter what city you're in, man's right.
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: Don't give a damn.
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: I don't care if you're in Stow, you know.
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you grow up a mess, you know, and you
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: know what Stowe is, that's right next to Vermont.
• 35:25
  Speaker 3: I know then there. I saw things when I was
• 35:30
  Speaker 3: younger too.
• 35:31
  Speaker 4: I mean, but you know, sometimes you look at it
• 35:36
  Speaker 4: and say, how do you really overcome this?
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: You know?
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: I said, yes, sometimes if nobody's here and just look
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: around and I just wonder why why?
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: Wow?
• 35:47
  Speaker 4: You know, And sometimes I don't have anything to say. Yeah,
• 35:50
  Speaker 4: I would just look around and keep an eye on
• 35:53
  Speaker 4: my peep, you know, and just you know, I really
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: don't know much more when I can say jog, you know,
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: I think I've said what was from my heart. Gosterday
• 36:10
  Speaker 4: after service yesterday, sat down with me, held my hand
• 36:15
  Speaker 4: and we said a prayer for today.
• 36:18
  Speaker 3: One day at a time. If it only takes one
• 36:22
  Speaker 3: day at a time, try it.
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: And if it can, if just this one conversation with
• 36:30
  Speaker 2: you and I can impact or even have a slight
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: impact on one person, that's all.
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: That's all I care about me too too. You know.
• 36:41
  Speaker 4: I'm not here to focus on myself or get any
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: glory out of this or any praise.
• 36:48
  Speaker 3: I don't know. It's not about me.
• 36:52
  Speaker 4: Yes, I told my story, but now it's not about
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: me anymore.
• 36:57
  Speaker 3: It's about everyone else. And a lot of them do
• 37:04
  Speaker 3: not know my.
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: Story because I've listened to them. It's their turney, not mine.
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: I had that.
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: You can say that so many people have been there.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: I tried, I attempted suicide, been there, I was I'm homeless,
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: been there.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: Scars.
• 37:27
  Speaker 4: Burning, been there? I mean I got a couple of
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: scars up here from Nice then there.
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: You're a cutter, yes, and a burner.
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: And I haven't done it in a long time.
• 37:45
  Speaker 4: And I mean, who's to say I can wake up
• 37:49
  Speaker 4: like I said tomorrow, say I need a drink or
• 37:52
  Speaker 4: something is so bad that I might end up burning
• 37:55
  Speaker 4: myself again, you know, But then I have to look
• 37:59
  Speaker 4: down right. I'm not a bad person because I did that, right.
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: I did it because you get so overwhelmed in your mind.
• 38:11
  Speaker 4: It's like walking in the cloud. And I think a
• 38:16
  Speaker 4: lot of the people around here, the homeless, is doing that.
• 38:20
  Speaker 4: They're walking in the cloud. Yeah, going which way do
• 38:24
  Speaker 4: I go?
• 38:25
  Speaker 3: Do I go left? Or do I go right? And
• 38:27
  Speaker 3: the right?
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: Left?
• 38:29
  Speaker 3: The road rust travel rovity farrest one of my favorites.
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: Which here do your joke?
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: I hear so many people say so often that God
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: puts certain people in certain places at certain times for
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: certain reasons.
• 38:48
  Speaker 1: I think you're an example of that.
• 38:49
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 38:52
  Speaker 4: Well of mind goes. I think God put his hand
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: on you. And this is just calling I said.
• 38:59
  Speaker 3: Well, I would busy. I hope that that's be a message.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: O, my best friend.
• 39:07
  Speaker 3: You know it.
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: Well your Let's let's do this again. We run please. Okay,
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: these real conversations, we need to have more of them.
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: Let's do it all right, Illove you Dave muy too.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah