Latest / Be It Till You See It / 670. Radiate Inner Glow With Love and Self Respect

Transcript

670. Radiate Inner Glow With Love and Self Respect · Be It Till You See It

0:00
[SPEAKER_01]: I was released from the hospital and I called a friend, I told her everything that happened and I ended with I can't believe I didn't die and her response was it's not your time and it was so profound that it sent a cold chill through my body.
0:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Welcome to the be it till you see it podcast, where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring.
0:36
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm also Logan, Ply's instructor and fitness business coach.
0:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I've trained thousands of people around the world, and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt.
0:47
[SPEAKER_02]: My friends, action brings clarity.
0:51
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's the antidote to fear.
0:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Each week my guests will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and be it till you see it.
1:04
[SPEAKER_02]: It's a practice, not a perfect, let's get started.
1:11
[SPEAKER_02]: Alright, be it babe.
1:12
[SPEAKER_02]: When I met this woman, I knew I had to have her on because she, she had her store.
1:18
[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to hear so much of you.
1:19
[SPEAKER_02]: And then you're going to hear her transformation.
1:22
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's what a lot of you are trying to be it till you see.
1:25
[SPEAKER_02]: I will say in her journey we do have we do discuss a suicide attempt.
1:29
[SPEAKER_02]: If that is something that's going to activate you today,
1:34
[SPEAKER_02]: doesn't go into detail, but it's it's a part of her journey.
1:37
[SPEAKER_02]: And I do think it is worthy to hear the whole journey of how she got to where she is, how she becomes the inner glow coach that she is and also like how you can have inner glow in your life and how that changes things and she's just so authentic and so cool.
1:52
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm really jazz for you to hear this.
1:54
[SPEAKER_02]: So here's Angie Hawkins.
1:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Hey, be it babe.
1:57
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm really excited and ready for this conversation.
2:00
[SPEAKER_02]: Our guest today is Angie Hawkins, and I think you're gonna hear a lot of similarities in her story and her journey in which he's working on.
2:08
[SPEAKER_02]: If you have ever felt like you've done all the things, and it's still not working today's episode is for you.
2:13
[SPEAKER_02]: So Angie Hawkins, can you tell everyone who you are and what you rock at?
2:17
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
2:18
[SPEAKER_01]: Hi, everyone.
2:18
[SPEAKER_01]: Thank you for having me Leslie.
2:20
[SPEAKER_01]: I am an interglow coach in what that means is I help high achieving women.
2:25
[SPEAKER_01]: Stop chasing love and approval and everything outside of themselves and actually radiate it from within so they can finally feel happy free and love for who they are.
2:35
[SPEAKER_01]: And I'm also the author of running as lippers, which is a raw and vulnerable memoir that the whole point of the book because it's very vulnerable is to encourage
2:47
[SPEAKER_02]: I couldn't agree more.
2:49
[SPEAKER_02]: Also, if you're not watching this beautiful woman on our YouTube channel, are those fresh flowers in your hair?
2:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Where are you living right now that you get to have those beautiful flowers in your hair?
2:58
[SPEAKER_02]: I live in Hawaii, so yes, I have fresh flowers in my earrings.
3:03
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god stop.
3:05
[SPEAKER_02]: Well, okay, so running in slippers, like most like I feel like there's a book like running in heels, which already sounds terrible running in slippers isn't easy to do either.
3:16
[SPEAKER_02]: Can we get vulnerable a little bit and talk about like yeah how did that title come about like what what is the journey that you had to go on because I do think by the way if you're listening we all get to go on a journey like that is the beautiful thing about this life and sometimes I think we feel like why is this happening to me, but there's something we get to learn from that so can you came me here yours.
3:34
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, I love that.
3:35
[SPEAKER_01]: And first of all, I before I get into my whole story, which honestly, the book run and slippers gets into all the details, because what I'm going to give you is just the high-level Cliff Notes version.
3:45
[SPEAKER_01]: But I live in Hawaii and we call Flipflop slippers.
3:49
[SPEAKER_01]: So it really means running and flipflop, even harder, even more dangerous.
3:53
[SPEAKER_01]: So, but the reason I titled the book that way is because it's a metaphor for life, because life, it can be fun, playful, and adventurous, but it can also be difficult, painful, and scary, just like running in flip-flops.
4:05
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, oh, that's so funny.
4:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Can you tell?
4:07
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm totally not an island girl that they do call slippers.
4:10
[SPEAKER_02]: That's okay.
4:11
[SPEAKER_02]: And they can be very child.
4:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, you're running on the, like, it's really cool.
4:14
[SPEAKER_02]: And then you also are running on a slippery sidewalk.
4:17
[SPEAKER_02]: And yeah.
4:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Exactly.
4:21
[SPEAKER_01]: So yeah, I think once people understand what it means, it's relatable and if you do read the book or anyone listening, if you do read the book, I explain that immediately in the introduction, so that people don't think I'm actually running in house lippers or is that just for us the whole meeting, I think?
4:37
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, well, you know what?
4:38
[SPEAKER_02]: Actually, I was picturing like, you going through something just like being a girl in her house shoes, like, run, chasing a dream that I need.
4:46
[SPEAKER_02]: I think there's so many metaphors, yeah.
4:49
[SPEAKER_02]: So, well, let's get into a cliff notes.
4:51
[SPEAKER_02]: I love it.
4:53
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
4:53
[SPEAKER_01]: So, basically, like most people, my origin story starts in childhood.
4:57
[SPEAKER_01]: And I was raised in a household where the most succinct way to say it is that my both of my parents were extremely emotionally unavailable.
5:08
[SPEAKER_01]: And as an adult, I understand what that means and I have the tools to process that and understand it, but as a little girl, I didn't have those tools and the way I interpreted the situation is that I thought that I didn't deserve to be loved.
5:24
[SPEAKER_01]: So very early on in life, I developed this belief.
5:29
[SPEAKER_01]: And as most of us are aware, your belief dictate your behaviors and then that dictates what you attract into your life.
5:37
[SPEAKER_01]: Though needless to say, I struggled
5:40
[SPEAKER_01]: for many years.
5:41
[SPEAKER_01]: Because I was a people pleaser.
5:43
[SPEAKER_01]: I was the one who was chasing love and approval outside of myself.
5:47
[SPEAKER_01]: I was the overachiever because I thought to earn the love and respect and approval.
5:52
[SPEAKER_01]: I had to have a high position at work or I ran marathons for a while and that became my identity.
5:59
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I had to get a good time.
6:00
[SPEAKER_01]: I was reaching for everything outside of myself.
6:04
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah,
6:09
[SPEAKER_01]: I was at a point in life where I honestly didn't even think that was available to me.
6:14
[SPEAKER_01]: I thought this is just how it life was.
6:16
[SPEAKER_01]: I didn't think I was worthy of it.
6:19
[SPEAKER_01]: I thought it was just something that other people had.
6:21
[SPEAKER_01]: So if I was viewing someone else who was happy and fulfilled in their life,
6:26
[SPEAKER_01]: It just didn't even seem attainable for me, so even though I was very unhappy, I just kind of went a long life, not really knowing what to do about it.
6:36
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I would read self-help books or, you know, do something like go to yoga or have like a spiritual practice or something and that would provide short term, a short term fix.
6:47
[SPEAKER_01]: But I didn't really have anything implemented for a long term change.
6:51
[SPEAKER_01]: And the first real turning point came in 2017, my boyfriend broke up with me and then my dad passed away and I was 37 years old and I had spent 37 years avoiding my feelings doing everything I could not to feel them.
7:08
[SPEAKER_01]: But I was in such profound grief that it was impossible not to be on my feelings.
7:14
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I didn't have the tools for emotional regulations.
7:17
[SPEAKER_01]: So.
7:18
[SPEAKER_01]: That's the way to say it was I felt like shit for most of that year because I was just sitting in these feelings that I didn't know what to do with and
7:27
[SPEAKER_01]: 2018 came around and I was probably like in this New Year's Resolution Energy and I decided that I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and I decided like I wanted to make some changes and I wanted to be happy.
7:40
[SPEAKER_01]: I was living in Chicago at the time and that's when I decided I wanted to move from Chicago to Hawaii.
7:47
[SPEAKER_01]: It works.
7:48
[SPEAKER_02]: Different.
7:49
[SPEAKER_02]: Huge differences.
7:51
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
7:51
[SPEAKER_01]: And I will say it was well-intentioned because I was actually taking agency over my life.
7:56
[SPEAKER_01]: I was doing something to make a change and be happier.
8:02
[SPEAKER_01]: It was not well-intentioned and that I was still reaching for something outside of myself to be the thing that made me feel better.
8:10
[SPEAKER_01]: wanted the change in location to be the thing that made me happy.
8:13
[SPEAKER_01]: And this will probably not come as a surprise.
8:16
[SPEAKER_01]: You cannot move away from your problems.
8:18
[SPEAKER_01]: So I moved 4,000 miles away and I still have the exact same issues.
8:23
[SPEAKER_01]: Not only that, I developed a whole new roster of problems.
8:27
[SPEAKER_01]: So for example, in 2018 remote work was not the trendy thing to do, but I was very fortunate because my job allowed me to move and keep my job.
8:36
[SPEAKER_01]: But at the exact same time that I moved, there was this huge management shake up that worked that threatened my role.
8:42
[SPEAKER_01]: And because I was in this victim mentality of like this is all that's available to me and like this happening to me.
8:49
[SPEAKER_01]: I for the first year that I lived here, I lived in constant fear of losing my job.
8:54
[SPEAKER_01]: I had a really hard time making friends when I first moved here, which was something I had never dealt with before.
9:00
[SPEAKER_01]: So.
9:01
[SPEAKER_01]: struggling with making friends, being thousands of miles away from anyone I knew felt extremely isolating.
9:08
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and you're an island.
9:09
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's already isolate.
9:10
[SPEAKER_01]: Exactly.
9:11
[SPEAKER_01]: Exactly.
9:12
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's like I didn't have, you know, I just felt really lonely, basically.
9:18
[SPEAKER_01]: And the last major thing that happened when I moved here is like to prove how all in and committed I was to my decision.
9:30
[SPEAKER_01]: backload into my bathroom, and I wasn't home for my entire condo flooded.
9:35
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
9:35
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
9:36
[SPEAKER_01]: So this is all.
9:37
[SPEAKER_01]: This is all right off the bat.
9:38
[SPEAKER_01]: So again, I'm expecting the change to be the thing that makes me feel better and everything was falling apart.
9:44
[SPEAKER_02]: And you're literally doing everything.
9:45
[SPEAKER_02]: So I go all in, got to burn the boat.
9:48
[SPEAKER_02]: You got to buy that condo without the bike's being checked.
9:51
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god.
9:53
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god.
9:53
[SPEAKER_02]: And you haven't even hit COVID yet.
9:55
[SPEAKER_02]: Shit.
9:57
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, that brings me to COVID because
9:59
[SPEAKER_01]: So that was 2018, right?
10:01
[SPEAKER_01]: So and I'm trying to be like I was totally emotionally bypassing my feelings.
10:05
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm like it's fine.
10:07
[SPEAKER_01]: I got this, but I'm not even exaggerating when I stayed the next two years.
10:11
[SPEAKER_01]: It was like thing after thing like my grandma died like there was always something.
10:15
[SPEAKER_01]: And because I didn't have that emotional foundation within myself, because everything outside of me was unraveling, I was unraveling.
10:23
[SPEAKER_01]: And then COVID happened.
10:25
[SPEAKER_01]: So I don't even have to explain how that exacerbated the situation.
10:29
[SPEAKER_01]: But the straw, yeah, the straw that broke the camel's back was the end of a relationship during COVID.
10:35
[SPEAKER_01]: And I just had this moment where, and I think we all have this, I still have these moments where it's like, I can't take this anymore.
10:42
[SPEAKER_01]: But unfortunately, layered on top of that feeling was the sheer feeling of hopelessness, because nothing had been going well, and I truly could not see any hope for the future, and that is such a dangerous place to be.
10:56
[SPEAKER_01]: So I intentionally overdose on my anxiety medication, and I spent a day and a half unconscious in my bathroom.
11:05
[SPEAKER_01]: I spent another day and a half in the hospital.
11:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Wait, no, I knew you were in your bathroom.
11:10
[SPEAKER_01]: No.
11:11
[SPEAKER_01]: I miraculously, I was blacked out.
11:14
[SPEAKER_01]: I miraculously texted a friend and she took me to the hospital.
11:17
[SPEAKER_01]: That's the only way I was transporting.
11:20
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, oh my god, what a story.
11:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god, oh my god, you're like, this is crazy.
11:26
[SPEAKER_01]: And then where I'll end is,
11:29
[SPEAKER_01]: I was released from the hospital and I called a friend.
11:32
[SPEAKER_01]: I told her everything that happened.
11:34
[SPEAKER_01]: And I ended with, I can't believe I didn't die.
11:37
[SPEAKER_01]: And her response was, it's not your time.
11:41
[SPEAKER_01]: And it was still profound that it sent a cold chill through my body.
11:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Sheels right in this moment.
11:47
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
11:48
[SPEAKER_01]: And in that moment, I was like, OK, I think I have a purpose.
11:53
[SPEAKER_01]: And I was determined to figure out what it was.
11:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my gosh, I just want to say thank you for sharing your story.
12:01
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm so glad there's something in you that texted up friend.
12:04
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm also glad that that friend wasn't on like, do not disturb.
12:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, I, oh my god, I'm that friend.
12:09
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm the do not disturb friend.
12:11
[SPEAKER_02]: I, this, I would go in my mind.
12:13
[SPEAKER_02]: My phone's always on silent.
12:14
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to figure this out.
12:16
[SPEAKER_02]: There's going to be a bypass for people, but like, it's so clear.
12:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Not only isn't at your time, but there was a part of you that was always trying to figure this out.
12:24
[SPEAKER_02]: I think, I'm hearing your story, like, there was this part of you that's like, I am, there is more from you out there, but like, you, so there's, and I think we all have this.
12:33
[SPEAKER_02]: I think so many of my listeners who are here, like, they know there is more and yet when they try to do the more.
12:41
[SPEAKER_02]: something happens.
12:43
[SPEAKER_02]: There's always a thing that happens.
12:45
[SPEAKER_02]: They make more money and then a huge bill happens.
12:47
[SPEAKER_02]: They break up with the toxic relationship.
12:50
[SPEAKER_02]: And then this thing happens and now they're alone.
12:54
[SPEAKER_02]: There's a whole thing.
12:54
[SPEAKER_02]: It's like everything is in balance.
12:56
[SPEAKER_02]: You get a good thing and you need a bad thing.
12:57
[SPEAKER_02]: But also sometimes we're just not ready.
13:00
[SPEAKER_02]: If you don't have the muscle for that, then it just feels like you're getting beat while you're down.
13:04
[SPEAKER_01]: Exactly.
13:05
[SPEAKER_01]: And I think we're saying the same thing, but I look at it as, for example, in my situation, my brain and my heart, but like they didn't want to be here, but my soul or higher self or whatever you want to call it really did.
13:18
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
13:19
[SPEAKER_01]: So I think there's always this part of us and we're all connected to our intuition or higher self, whether we're.
13:26
[SPEAKER_01]: like in two to it or not, but there's always that part of us that's calling us to this higher purpose or something else.
13:32
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
13:32
[SPEAKER_01]: But then we have to deal with the realities of the real world.
13:36
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
13:37
[SPEAKER_02]: So you wake up in this hospital and you now like it's not your time, but like you have to then get out of the hospital and and figure so how do you how do you do that?
13:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Like where do you start?
13:47
[SPEAKER_02]: Because like there's a million books.
13:49
[SPEAKER_02]: There's a million courses.
13:50
[SPEAKER_02]: There's
13:55
[SPEAKER_02]: you know, so how did you, how did you figure it out?
13:59
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, I don't know if this is lucky or unlucky, but because at the time this happened, I was 40 years old and I had spent out of my 30s reading all the books, doing all the workshops, doing all of that stuff, but again, it had only provided like something short-term.
14:17
[SPEAKER_01]: It really didn't give any
14:22
[SPEAKER_01]: So, fast forward to when, you know, my friend told me that and I decided, like, okay, I need to get help and I need to get help the right way.
14:32
[SPEAKER_01]: I decided to invest in myself and actually hire a coach because it had been something I was thinking about, but when you're not fully committed to a decision, you're just kind of in this wishy-washy energy.
14:46
[SPEAKER_01]: And in addition to that, again, I was in the state of not really feeling worthy of investing in myself or putting in the time energy or money, but when you're desperate like I was because keep in mind, I felt worse than I did before I took the pills and yeah.
15:04
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, I can't explain almost dying does too, but there were several weeks where I had one foot on the other side of the veil, which was kind of a scary experience in its own.
15:14
[SPEAKER_01]: So for several weeks, my only goal was to make it through the day, so I was so desperate for help, and I knew I had to get help the right way that like the first thing I did was reach out to a coach and again, this just happened to be loved because in my, I call it like.
15:33
[SPEAKER_01]: from the time I got out of the hospital out, I called that my healing and earnest journey, but my healing, not an earnest.
15:41
[SPEAKER_01]: I had gone to this healing intensive, and I had met this coach, and he was actually a men's dating coach, but he doesn't teach like pick up artists type stuff.
15:50
[SPEAKER_01]: He teaches men how to be the best versions of themselves so that they can attract the right partner.
15:57
[SPEAKER_01]: So we followed each other on Instagram, so all of his messaging, even though it was like geared toward men, it was about being the best version of yourself.
16:05
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I had thought about reaching out to him before, but now that I was desperate, I'm like, I don't care if he's a men's dating coach.
16:12
[SPEAKER_01]: I'm reaching out to him.
16:12
[SPEAKER_01]: So I reached out to him.
16:13
[SPEAKER_01]: You had a great talk.
16:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
16:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
16:16
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
16:16
[SPEAKER_01]: So I was very lucky that I had already made that connection with someone I trusted, otherwise I would have been searching.
16:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
16:23
[SPEAKER_02]: And like at a time that like again, there's there was a party that was already seeking these things out.
16:29
[SPEAKER_02]: There's the other party that was like, like you said not feeling worthy.
16:33
[SPEAKER_02]: And I I hear this, you know, I just came back from an amazing retreat.
16:37
[SPEAKER_02]: And one of the women who came on it, she's like, yeah, I want those people who get going, oh, I'll do it next time.
16:42
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, you know, when I have this, then I, then I can sign up for it.
16:45
[SPEAKER_02]: When I've done this and I can sign up for it.
16:46
[SPEAKER_02]: And then she's like, fuck it.
16:47
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm, I'm worried that you go right now.
16:49
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, that I love that.
16:51
[SPEAKER_02]: That right there, that makes me so happy and also, you know, so many people smart women listening to this show right now.
16:58
[SPEAKER_02]: will do that, but a little negotiation.
17:01
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, when I do this, then I'll be, and it's a your fucking worthy already.
17:05
[SPEAKER_02]: And then this is no offense to the parents who are listening.
17:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Everyone is doing the best they can't, but most of us, somewhere in life, along the way, feel like we have to earn the worthiness that we are already born way.
17:16
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes.
17:17
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
17:17
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and that's where like the chasing something outside of yourself.
17:21
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, and then that's why you only get those quick little fixes, but it doesn't last.
17:25
[SPEAKER_02]: So you found this guy and he helped you and then what?
17:30
[SPEAKER_02]: Like was like, well, I've made it.
17:33
[SPEAKER_01]: No, it was absolutely a process.
17:35
[SPEAKER_01]: I won't sugarcoat that part because any lasting change is a process, right?
17:40
[SPEAKER_01]: But the value and the work that I did with him was, you know, I still have these little wooden beliefs.
17:45
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, I'm not worthy.
17:46
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't deserve to be loved blah, blah, blah, blah.
17:49
[SPEAKER_01]: But he helped me.
17:50
[SPEAKER_01]: change my behaviors, so that eventually, because when I started setting healthy boundaries, when I started trusting myself, when I started implementing all the things that we talked about like over time, that actually changed my beliefs.
18:05
[SPEAKER_01]: And so now I do believe I deserve to be loved.
18:08
[SPEAKER_01]: I do respect myself, I do trust myself, but that all came like through this process of working with the coach.
18:14
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's what ultimately led me,
18:19
[SPEAKER_01]: But instead of stepping into my authentic self and realizing what I want in life, what makes me happy and fulfilled, I realized corporate America was not it and I also realized that there are so many other women who are now struggling in the same way that I used to struggle, so I was like, I want to help them, so I put corporate America and became an inner flow coach.
18:40
[SPEAKER_02]: I love this.
18:41
[SPEAKER_02]: I also love the edits and our glow.
18:43
[SPEAKER_02]: Like it's just like, because it's, you know, we, we are most of us are seeking outside of ourselves to change the inside of ourselves.
18:50
[SPEAKER_02]: And you just have to think about like your limiting beliefs and want you to change your beliefs.
18:54
[SPEAKER_02]: It's true.
18:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Like we think, okay, well, first of all, this environment, it's not clean.
18:58
[SPEAKER_02]: So because this room is in clean, I can't do the things that I said I was going to do.
19:02
[SPEAKER_02]: And then when you don't do the things you said you're going to do, you don't have confidence.
19:05
[SPEAKER_02]: Because that's just by the way how confident it's works, right?
19:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Like confidence works by doing the thing you said you're going to do.
19:10
[SPEAKER_02]: And so when then we're like, but we think it's outside stuff.
19:13
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I got to make sure that like this is just writer.
19:15
[SPEAKER_02]: That's just, but the lighting's just right.
19:17
[SPEAKER_02]: But really, it's the belief system that we have.
19:20
[SPEAKER_02]: That affects everything.
19:23
[SPEAKER_02]: So can we do, if you want to go there, like can we talk about that because like if you're someone who typically see a people please are and who you know was also as you mentioned like nerve like nervous about like losing your job like I imagine that the belief systems you had were then causing you to like.
19:39
[SPEAKER_02]: run around and be everything to every body and then you have to change the belief system to be like, nope, not doing that.
19:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, what's the path?
19:47
[SPEAKER_02]: How do you do that?
19:49
[SPEAKER_01]: I mean, it's a whole process, but the whole, and this is what my coaching program is based on, but the overall concept is we're all born with this light inside of us.
19:58
[SPEAKER_01]: But then, as we go about life, there's family systems, there's society systems, there's corporate America systems, there's all these systems that if you really think about it, they're just arbitrary rules that someone made up along the way and we're just blindly following them.
20:14
[SPEAKER_01]: So we become disconnected from ourselves and it dims our light.
20:18
[SPEAKER_01]: And for example, because I used to be a people pleaser, I would not even question, like if someone invited me to do
20:28
[SPEAKER_01]: I wouldn't even question like, what do I want to do?
20:30
[SPEAKER_01]: What makes me happy and fulfilled?
20:32
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's not about, and I, and this is why I think I struggled with self help when I was healing in my 30s and reaching for things outside of myself because a lot of it is geared toward fixing yourself or changing something about yourself, but really it's about coming back home to who you are.
20:49
[SPEAKER_01]: And facing your life off of that because when you stop giving your power away to all these external things, you've really stopped caring because when you're concerned about am I living in integrity am I happy with who I am as a person am I happy with my decisions you stop caring about what other people think about it.
21:07
[SPEAKER_02]: That is so true.
21:10
[SPEAKER_02]: That is so true and so many.
21:14
[SPEAKER_02]: I was just doing a call with some of the people that I teach today.
21:17
[SPEAKER_02]: And you know, I could tell, the question was a very valid question, but I was like, so people, some people won't like you if you do it.
21:24
[SPEAKER_02]: The often, the way that's authentic to you, that's also okay.
21:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Like they're allowed to go, I don't like that.
21:30
[SPEAKER_02]: And it doesn't mean that you're not a great person.
21:33
[SPEAKER_02]: You're not a great teacher, but we are so conditioned to be liked.
21:38
[SPEAKER_02]: If you're liked, then you did something right.
21:42
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, and I actually have the opposite viewpoint now because I totally used to be like that.
21:46
[SPEAKER_01]: I wanted everyone to like me and if someone didn't then I would like chase after their approval.
21:51
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, but now.
21:52
[SPEAKER_01]: Now I really don't care and that doesn't mean I don't care about the other person.
21:58
[SPEAKER_01]: It just means that I respect their free will.
22:00
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I'm not for everybody and that's okay.
22:02
[SPEAKER_01]: Like they have other people that they choose to surround themselves with.
22:06
[SPEAKER_01]: And that's okay.
22:06
[SPEAKER_01]: I respect who they are as a person.
22:09
[SPEAKER_01]: But you have to be like so grounded and who you are as a person to even get to that point.
22:14
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
22:14
[SPEAKER_02]: And that's the hard part because also if you're so used to,
22:20
[SPEAKER_02]: trying to anchor in the outside world of who you are, then coming home to yourself, it's gonna feel unfamiliar and people don't like change, right?
22:29
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, yes.
22:31
[SPEAKER_01]: And I think that's why a lot of people resist change because a huge part in my healing and earnest journey was finding who I was, which was a huge identity shift, because I didn't even know who I was, because I had spent most of my life conforming to all these things outside of myself,
22:50
[SPEAKER_01]: was able to see why I had resisted it for so long.
22:53
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I mean, it makes me think of like that runaway bride where she like doesn't stick to her eggs.
22:57
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, and then at the end, she just you're like ordering eggs all the different ways.
23:00
[SPEAKER_02]: So she can figure it out.
23:01
[SPEAKER_02]: Because it is kind of like, well, how do you know your home?
23:05
[SPEAKER_02]: Like how do you know that you're not?
23:06
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, like conforming again just another way.
23:09
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, that's, can you see, like, for my anxiety, we'll go.
23:14
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, no, like one of the first things that my coach worked with me on and this is one of the first things I work with my clients on is creating your own rules for life so you create these value statements and it's like any decision you make you just kind of go down the list am I doing this this this then yep, then I'm good to go so once you have your own rules for life, it doesn't matter.
23:37
[SPEAKER_01]: as long as you're not breaking the law or anything with.
23:39
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
23:40
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
23:41
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, you know, like, and, and that's true.
23:43
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, you're not hurting people.
23:44
[SPEAKER_02]: They're roles for your life that affect only you.
23:46
[SPEAKER_02]: And I actually love this because, you know, people like we coach pause instructors on their business and someone's like, oh, should I do this?
23:53
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm like,
23:54
[SPEAKER_02]: What are your values for your business?
23:55
[SPEAKER_02]: Does it go through those?
23:57
[SPEAKER_02]: And so it makes sense to have rules for life.
24:00
[SPEAKER_02]: It's just very much a value system of how you want.
24:02
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's like, does this, you know, does this, like, I will do things that light me up.
24:06
[SPEAKER_02]: I'll do things after 9 a.m. because I no longer get up early for people, like, oh, it's for me to 9 a.m. Well, then that is a no.
24:15
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
24:16
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, and it's hard to do, but once you have that system in place, life is so much easier, because that's another thing.
24:23
[SPEAKER_01]: I used to feel like life was such a struggle, but it was because I was making that way for myself.
24:28
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah, I think we all, I think a lot of us are doing that.
24:31
[SPEAKER_02]: So I guess like,
24:33
[SPEAKER_02]: So since you were, can we go back to it like when your people please are like that look like just like being a yes person for whatever people are saying, how do you now respond to people asking things of you or the fit, like if you know what I mean, like what is, what is a way that you're now responding in life to not being a people, please are in owning things for yourself and owning like the way you wanna live.
24:56
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, I guess it's different for different situations, but because I think I stayed too far because I first started implementing boundaries when I worked in corporate America.
25:05
[SPEAKER_01]: And at first I would just be like, no, not doing that.
25:08
[SPEAKER_01]: Nope.
25:09
[SPEAKER_01]: But, which, no, is it going to happen?
25:12
[SPEAKER_02]: And do you should do everything?
25:13
[SPEAKER_02]: Now she does nothing.
25:15
[SPEAKER_01]: And, and, no, is it complete sentence, but you do have to take into consideration the circumstance.
25:22
[SPEAKER_01]: Especially if it's like we're for family and friends, but usually I'll just simply explain, like for example, something that comes up frequently is that people will ask me to have a call on the weekend and that's just a boundary that I have.
25:35
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't do calls on the weekend.
25:37
[SPEAKER_01]: Um, I will rearrange any time during my week, like just some extent, but I just like that's my personal time where I recharge is the weekend.
25:46
[SPEAKER_01]: So if someone is like, I just had someone this week, will can you do a call on a Saturday?
25:51
[SPEAKER_01]: And I was like, no, I'm sorry.
25:52
[SPEAKER_01]: I don't do calls on the weekends.
25:53
[SPEAKER_01]: And it was no problem.
25:54
[SPEAKER_01]: She's like, oh, sure.
25:55
[SPEAKER_01]: I'll find another time during the week.
25:57
[SPEAKER_01]: So it seems scary to do, but in most cases, it's not a problem.
26:02
[SPEAKER_01]: Now, if she would have said, like, there's absolutely no other time during the week for the foreseeable future, I might have considered it.
26:09
[SPEAKER_01]: So it's still not a strict no, but I do protect my energy as much as possible.
26:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, well, and I, but I love the way you phrased it because you're also educating the person that it's like, instead of saying, like, some people would go like, like, I do it this one Saturday, but like, that isn't setting a boundary.
26:26
[SPEAKER_02]: It's actually like, like, I think that that's a thing.
26:29
[SPEAKER_02]: And instead you're like, oh, I don't do calls on the weekends.
26:31
[SPEAKER_02]: That is actually like letting people let in the person know like, it's not a no, I don't like you.
26:35
[SPEAKER_02]: It's just a you're asking for a time.
26:37
[SPEAKER_02]: It's not available and isn't available.
26:39
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, so yeah.
26:44
[SPEAKER_02]: being liked, feeling worthy, the people pleasing theirs, it's it's such a simple sentence once you are ever arrived and like knowing that you're worthy and it's so difficult because it's like, you just say that, you just say, no, I don't do calls on the weekends, it's like, give it a try, you know, but it's hard, it's hard for people.
27:02
[SPEAKER_01]: It is hard, but the funny thing is it really is that easy because like the first few times I had to say no because I used to be I used to have zero boundaries like I couldn't even if someone invited me to do something I couldn't even say no to that but when I first started using the word no like no I'm sorry I need to rest this weekend or whatever.
27:23
[SPEAKER_01]: And then they were like, okay, that's fine, because it's very rare that you have people push back.
27:27
[SPEAKER_01]: And honestly, the people that do push back on your boundaries are the kind of people you don't want your life anyway, so they're going to come together and find.
27:35
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and it becomes very apparent, very fast and that's actually helpful information for you.
27:39
[SPEAKER_01]: So boundaries are so powerful and so many ways.
27:44
[SPEAKER_02]: I do it's really interesting because some people are like, oh, you're so rigid.
27:47
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm like.
27:48
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm not rigid actually, I just don't just don't do things on your timeline.
27:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
27:56
[SPEAKER_02]: So my timeline.
27:57
[SPEAKER_02]: And that's okay because I also don't have expectations that you do things on my timeline.
28:01
[SPEAKER_02]: You know, like, with there is a Venn diagram where our timelines will align if it's meant to be together.
28:07
[SPEAKER_01]: but you probably also have a lot of people who respect how self-respecting you are of yourself because I got to the point where this happened a lot of work.
28:15
[SPEAKER_01]: People would compliment me on my boundaries and I was like, be like someone who used to not have boundaries.
28:22
[SPEAKER_01]: So a lot of people will actually respect you for having boundaries.
28:25
[SPEAKER_02]: They totally do and also like, and if they don't are there, I'm like, oh, why is this person getting so upset about the fact that I just, I cannot to have called for nine a.m. because you want to know why I'm gonna forget it there
28:37
[SPEAKER_02]: have to work before 9 a.m.
28:39
[SPEAKER_02]: So on a day, I have to work for 9 a.m.
28:41
[SPEAKER_02]: There are three people reminding me that I've got a call at eight, because I'll just go, yeah, yeah, you told me, you told me, and it's like, good to do.
28:50
[SPEAKER_02]: So like, it's more out of like my habit is I don't.
28:53
[SPEAKER_02]: So then I don't have to remember anything extra.
28:55
[SPEAKER_02]: But I do, I do, I do think that these things reveal things about people and it reveals like, are we going to work together?
29:02
[SPEAKER_02]: Well, you know,
29:06
[SPEAKER_02]: respect that I have so much as such good grounded boundaries and and also like it's because I used all like you always have none and I used to chase like if anyone would invite me I would just go okay I'm coming over yeah I'm spending the night how many nights all stays I'll stay all the nights you want like I wouldn't go home for like a week my parents would just like okay you know because like I was having too much fun but also like I wasn't actually doing anything for me I was being whatever we wanted to do it there you know that
29:31
[SPEAKER_02]: So I all the way until when I got a job, oh my gosh, Angie, I would get every job I had that was not for myself.
29:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I would just keep getting promoted.
29:41
[SPEAKER_02]: And I would just say yes, that's like the lack of boundaries.
29:43
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, okay, yeah, I'll take on that job that I have no idea how to do.
29:46
[SPEAKER_02]: No problem, I got it.
29:47
[SPEAKER_02]: I'll do it and like, I'd end you had a quit my job so they wouldn't promote me again cause I couldn't trust myself to turn it down cause I needed the money.
29:56
[SPEAKER_02]: So it was like, I needed the money.
29:57
[SPEAKER_02]: The promotion came with a raise and also also they're like, well, Leslie will always you 150%.
30:03
[SPEAKER_02]: So she'll just do more than this is being paid for anyways.
30:06
[SPEAKER_02]: And like, so I just it took me a lot.
30:08
[SPEAKER_02]: It took me like literally having to quit my job.
30:10
[SPEAKER_02]: So I wouldn't.
30:11
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and that's why I got really disgruntled with corporate America because it's it's like a dysfunctional family like they will promote the people who have zero boundaries because they can take advantage of them.
30:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, and I and I don't have other things.
30:26
[SPEAKER_02]: I also don't even think it's a conscious decision.
30:28
[SPEAKER_02]: They're just like, oh, this person does so much.
30:30
[SPEAKER_02]: Why wouldn't we want them to do more.
30:32
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, so okay, but we do have a lot of people who don't get to quit their job and become an interglow coach so like if if people want to work on their interglow But then have to like work within corporate America like is there hope for them?
30:44
[SPEAKER_02]: Can they do it?
30:47
[SPEAKER_01]: It depends on the situation.
30:48
[SPEAKER_01]: Like I wish I could say that I just had so much courage and just, you know, wildly went on on my own.
30:55
[SPEAKER_01]: But even after I had the idea that I wanted to quit and start my own business, I still had to have the universe kick me in the butt because I was transferred to this team.
31:05
[SPEAKER_01]: And I basically had a bully as a manager and it got so bad that I couldn't stand it.
31:10
[SPEAKER_01]: And I was like, okay, this is my sign to leave.
31:16
[SPEAKER_01]: your choices are limited.
31:17
[SPEAKER_01]: However, like I've been in other situations that were not that toxic and I do think you can navigate them.
31:23
[SPEAKER_01]: Again, like by having strong boundaries is huge, but having a strong sense of yourself so that they're not taking advantage of you and walking all over you.
31:33
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
31:34
[SPEAKER_02]: I think like when you do have strong boundaries, you can recognize that in a company.
31:38
[SPEAKER_02]: So if you're like interviewing, you can start to recognize like the signs that their boundaries are, you know, that they're like, I had someone, I took a breathwork course and they said, there are space makers and there are space takers and nothing that neither is wrong.
31:51
[SPEAKER_02]: But can we all agree space makers that you can raise your hand first and space takers?
31:57
[SPEAKER_02]: If they ask more of you, it doesn't mean that they're assholes.
32:00
[SPEAKER_02]: You just have to say, no.
32:04
[SPEAKER_02]: And sometimes it is unintentional.
32:06
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I do think so.
32:07
[SPEAKER_02]: I think they're just asking.
32:08
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, there are people who are good questioners.
32:10
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, I'm not that person.
32:11
[SPEAKER_02]: And they'll just ask, I'm like, oh my god, they just asked that person to write their bio, but they're just asking.
32:18
[SPEAKER_02]: And like, it requires other person to go, oh, I actually, I review bios, but I don't write them.
32:23
[SPEAKER_02]: You know?
32:24
[SPEAKER_02]: So, you know, like, yeah, we have to, I think where people struggle is that they,
32:28
[SPEAKER_02]: They figure out their boundaries and maybe you can help with this.
32:30
[SPEAKER_02]: They figure out their boundaries are.
32:31
[SPEAKER_02]: And then they have to reinforce them because unfortunately there isn't like a rules sheet when you enter this app, like when you enter a call with me, there's not like you're all the rules I have, right?
32:44
[SPEAKER_02]: Like the rules of engagement, that's not how life works.
32:46
[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to be out and about.
32:47
[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to run into people.
32:48
[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to be a grocery store.
32:49
[SPEAKER_02]: You're going to be in a job interview.
32:50
[SPEAKER_02]: So
32:51
[SPEAKER_02]: like how do people like is how did you navigate having to enforce your boundaries after you got like after the pendulum swung all the way and you're like no like how did you like whine in the middle to like enforce boundaries out feeling like you're constantly enforcing your boundaries.
33:07
[SPEAKER_01]: That's a really good question because the hardest part of boundaries is not setting them it's enforcing them because there are people who will intentionally try to walk all over you and try to encroach your boundaries, but to your point earlier people will unintentionally like.
33:25
[SPEAKER_01]: You know, just try to inch up on them and you have to be stern on enforcing them and it could be it again it depends on the situation, but it could escalate to the point where it's like I can no longer talk to you if you're continue to disrespect my known.
33:48
[SPEAKER_01]: The consequence, you have to be willing to enforce the consequence if they do encroach your boundary again.
33:54
[SPEAKER_01]: So it can be difficult and there have been people in my life that I've had to cut off communication with for that reason.
34:01
[SPEAKER_01]: But like in the long run, it makes my mental health so much better because you don't have that person ducking up your energy anymore.
34:10
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
34:11
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I agree and also thank God for technology because it's so easy to block and blasts.
34:15
[SPEAKER_02]: You can block phone numbers.
34:16
[SPEAKER_02]: You can block emails.
34:17
[SPEAKER_02]: You can block socials.
34:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, you can also help them at the time that's right, but like you can protect your energy.
34:23
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, that's true.
34:24
[SPEAKER_02]: I probably should ask you this earlier, but like can we talk about what interglow looks like what it means?
34:30
[SPEAKER_02]: Like what is it like, you know, obviously as we heard your journey like, you know, obviously free the earnest time, maybe no interglow.
34:38
[SPEAKER_02]: But like what is what does it mean when we have interglow?
34:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Like how do we know if we have it?
34:44
[SPEAKER_01]: Well, so the reason I came up with a name in her glow is because when I truly started believing like that I loved myself, that I deserved to be loved and I respected myself and I believed that I deserved that from other people, it was truly a sensation of in my chest.
35:00
[SPEAKER_01]: Like it felt like the sun was glowing.
35:03
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, it was like, maybe I can explain it as like an energetic feeling from the inside out.
35:07
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
35:08
[SPEAKER_01]: But on top of that, I would have other people tell me, like, oh, you're glowing.
35:13
[SPEAKER_01]: Or some people would even just compliment my looks in that, like, oh, you're looks so beautiful.
35:18
[SPEAKER_01]: blah, blah, blah.
35:19
[SPEAKER_01]: But I think they were really talking about the reflection of my energy.
35:23
[SPEAKER_01]: So the inner blow is radiating in your own love and respect so much that it's actually radiating to people outside of use, so not only do they see it, but they can be inspired by it and it's a ripple effect because I'm of the mindset that you're either contributing to the negative vibration of the universe because there's plenty of that going on right now.
35:45
[SPEAKER_01]: or you're contributing to raising the vibration of the universe.
35:48
[SPEAKER_01]: So like this ripple effect, even extends out to raising the vibration of the entire universe because you're sending out because there's so many things going on in this world right now that it's hard for us to impact on a new individual level, but even just sending that energy of love to certain areas of the world actually does make a difference.
36:07
[SPEAKER_02]: Really you're so I'm glad we're touching on this because I think it is you can even feel like Especially in the time that we're talking they can feel like what's the point like everything is falling apart So many people have less to me.
36:21
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm barely keeping up like most of my listeners at the time We're going to this guy's a talktober
36:26
[SPEAKER_02]: 23rd, 2025, and the, you know, if you're listening to the states, government shutdown, people are hearing that their health insurance would go up to 30,000 or 40,000 a year from nine.
36:36
[SPEAKER_02]: And like you could be like, why should I have an intergal, how do I even think about glowing when like,
36:42
[SPEAKER_02]: This is happening outside of my control and people have less than and it's and you can almost feel like what's the point but you're what you said it the point is like the world needs more of us to raise the vibrations and effect even if you affect the three people that are your neighbors and you show them so much love it does it does have a domino effect it does have this like magnetism effect I do believe that.
37:07
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah, and even if you don't think just being in your own positive light is changing the universe, you can actually just pick someone and send positive energy to that person and possibly it makes a difference in that person's life.
37:23
[SPEAKER_02]: It does.
37:23
[SPEAKER_02]: I love that.
37:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Gosh, Angie, you're so cool.
37:26
[SPEAKER_02]: Like what you're doing is so needed and I think like.
37:30
[SPEAKER_02]: Especially because, you know, I've had, I've heard so many lists of going, I've done this.
37:34
[SPEAKER_02]: I've done this.
37:34
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm still stuck.
37:35
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm still struggling.
37:37
[SPEAKER_02]: And I, when I like I'm gathering from this is like it's all that outward stuff, it's not, it's not actually going to make the change.
37:46
[SPEAKER_02]: It has to be the inner glow.
37:48
[SPEAKER_02]: It has to be this inner vibration that you're changing and that test take time and it has take a lot of knowing of who you are and that's a process.
37:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, but it is 100% worth it and I am proof of that and you're like at this go you've got these gorgeous wallpaper that matches your plants in the background like you're just blowing so well we can talk forever and we'll probably have to have another conversation in the future, but take a brief break and then find out how people can find you follow you and work with you.
38:25
[SPEAKER_01]: Yes, please visit my website.
38:26
[SPEAKER_01]: It is running at slippers.com, which is also the name of my book.
38:30
[SPEAKER_01]: So there's obviously information on where to buy the book.
38:32
[SPEAKER_01]: It's on paperback, Kindle, and audio book.
38:35
[SPEAKER_01]: And I do narrate the audio book.
38:37
[SPEAKER_01]: But there's also information on my coaching program.
38:41
[SPEAKER_01]: My current coaching program is called Shine from the inside.
38:44
[SPEAKER_01]: And I do offer free 60 minute find your glow sessions.
38:49
[SPEAKER_01]: So we will talk for an hour about whatever you're struggling with.
38:52
[SPEAKER_01]: And at the end, I will give recommendations for going forward because, you know, my, me and my coaching program are not for everyone and I am okay with that.
39:02
[SPEAKER_01]: So if we're not a good fit, I know other coaches, I know therapists, I have other resources that I can refer you to the entire goal of the call is to get you help because again, I am confident that there are other women struggling in the same way I was and you do not have to live it like that.
39:20
[SPEAKER_01]: hour call and you guys take advantage because everyone I've done a call with has a breakthrough on that call because an hour is a long time.
39:30
[SPEAKER_01]: Yeah.
39:31
[SPEAKER_01]: Oh, you're so good.
39:39
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, you have given us a lot already, but we do at the show like to have a little not too long didn't listen, but just like a little summary and like an actionable step we can take because we are hyper farmers who are listening to this podcast, so both executable intrinsic or targets have people can take to be it till they see at what you have for us.
39:56
[SPEAKER_01]: Number one is to decide because any meaningful change in your life comes from a decision and the reason that is is because if you're not committed you're going to be in the squishy washi energy and that's where you hear people say stuff like well I tried and it's not working or I'm trying and if you're not committed to something.
40:17
[SPEAKER_01]: You're going to with the second it gets hard.
40:20
[SPEAKER_01]: But when you're committed to your decision, then the only choice is to stay on that path and figure out if something isn't working, then you'll figure out what does.
40:30
[SPEAKER_01]: So I know it sounds simplistic, but when you make a decision to do something.
40:34
[SPEAKER_01]: You're committed and all in and that's when the real change happened.
40:39
[SPEAKER_01]: That's when lasting change happens.
40:41
[SPEAKER_01]: Number two is to take action, and I know you've talked about this a lot, so I won't dwell on that.
40:46
[SPEAKER_01]: But number three, which is in conjunction with taking action is about your nervous system, because a lot of people think that confidence and courage is about not being afraid, and taking action is about feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
41:00
[SPEAKER_01]: So before you take action, you need to prime your nervous system.
41:04
[SPEAKER_01]: So an easy way to do that is just like sit up straight,
41:09
[SPEAKER_01]: Some people do the Superman pose what I do if I'm doing something in public.
41:13
[SPEAKER_01]: I call it the goddess walk or the celebrity walk.
41:16
[SPEAKER_01]: I will walk in the place like I own it, even if I'm like a nervous wreck and falling apart on the inside, but it's priming your nervous system to feel the fear and do it anyway and just overall your nervous system regulation because I used to be the kind of person I would let anxiety and fear absolutely take over me.
41:35
[SPEAKER_01]: But now I have the tools to actually feel safe in my own body, while I'm feeling those feelings, and knowing that they're not going to consume me and overwhelm me.
41:45
[SPEAKER_01]: So, nervous system regulation and feeling safe in your own body while you're feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
41:51
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god, I'm obsessed.
41:52
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, I have a fun spray for you.
41:54
[SPEAKER_02]: And this will be a great way for people have an example of that goddess fuck.
41:58
[SPEAKER_02]: So in our town in our village, there's a there's a couple street lights now in the city, which is really annoying because I think it's causing more traffic.
42:07
[SPEAKER_02]: And people have now decided to have cars instead of motos.
42:09
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't know why you want to be in a car, going 20 miles an hour, when you could be in a moto, going 25, but that's fine.
42:14
[SPEAKER_02]: At any rate,
42:15
[SPEAKER_02]: You just have to cross the street.
42:17
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, so I don't know if you have rented something to say, but you just have to cross the street and the window Indonesia correct.
42:23
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, there it is.
42:24
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes.
42:25
[SPEAKER_02]: So you have to cross and they and you can't you cannot stop if you stop that's when you.
42:31
[SPEAKER_02]: You fuck it all up because now the bike was like expecting you to continue going and they were going to be right behind you and now you stopped and now they have to swear but then there's so many behind so it becomes a domino effect and when I first went to Cambodia we were in pen on pen and I saw this she could have been
42:46
[SPEAKER_02]: seven years old and she had a little kid who, I don't know, barely walking in her hand.
42:51
[SPEAKER_02]: You guys, this was a five lane wide on any American street, but probably like 10 lane wide in Europe because like, you know, how most streets are really wide in the States.
43:01
[SPEAKER_02]: Anyway, she put her hand up and just cross the street with this little kid and she just had her hand up seven years old and she's cross the street.
43:09
[SPEAKER_02]: I saw the first time I went to an on-pan I saw this and I was like, look at that girl.
43:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Look at that confidence, right?
43:14
[SPEAKER_02]: But,
43:14
[SPEAKER_02]: when we moved it to the same rape we do our time there.
43:18
[SPEAKER_02]: I channel that girl every time so when I cross the street I just throw my arms up and I just walk like it's my fucking street and you can go around me and so these women are like okay we go and I'm like what's we're gonna do is we're gonna open our arms and we're gonna walk and we're gonna own this place and by the hour out of by the and Angie everyone is just like
43:37
[SPEAKER_01]: Like, I love that story.
43:39
[SPEAKER_02]: I love that.
43:40
[SPEAKER_02]: That's a perfect example.
43:42
[SPEAKER_02]: It's like walking.
43:43
[SPEAKER_02]: It's like the miscongenial, like a walk in here.
43:45
[SPEAKER_02]: But like, like, to love, like, open, good vibes.
43:48
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's just so funny.
43:50
[SPEAKER_02]: And now to be home, and I'm like, oh, I'm just, I have to wait for the light.
43:54
[SPEAKER_02]: Or do you?
43:55
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, you can do that here.
43:57
[SPEAKER_02]: Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah,
44:05
[SPEAKER_02]: I just want to reiterate, people who are you think are confident and courageous are not without fear.
44:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, they are truly, they did a show.
44:15
[SPEAKER_02]: It's show time, pep talk, something.
44:18
[SPEAKER_02]: They're shaking in the bootjeer, not like behind the podium.
44:21
[SPEAKER_02]: They're all doing it.
44:22
[SPEAKER_02]: And you can, I just, this is a great show, Angie.
44:25
[SPEAKER_02]: You're the best.
44:26
[SPEAKER_02]: Thank you for helping us find our interglow.
44:28
[SPEAKER_02]: You guys, how are we going to use these tips in your life?
44:30
[SPEAKER_02]: We want to know tag, Angie, tag to be a pod.
44:33
[SPEAKER_02]: Go get that phone call with her.
44:35
[SPEAKER_02]: My goodness, like you're going to break through.
44:36
[SPEAKER_02]: Who wouldn't want to do that?
44:38
[SPEAKER_02]: And oh my gosh, I'm so jealous.
44:39
[SPEAKER_02]: And you're going to why you're right now.
44:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, just, you're on a beautiful island.
44:43
[SPEAKER_02]: Anyways, thank you so much for being our guest today, Angie, and everyone.
44:47
[SPEAKER_02]: Please show the friend who needs to hear it until next time.
44:49
[SPEAKER_02]: Be it tell you see it.
45:03
[SPEAKER_02]: Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Beat Pot on Instagram.
45:07
[SPEAKER_02]: I would love to know more about you, share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it, help us and others be a tell you see it.
45:14
[SPEAKER_02]: Have an awesome day!
45:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Be it till you see it is a production of the blue pod cast network.
45:21
[SPEAKER_02]: If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at plus one and three one oh nine oh five five three four or send a DM on Instagram at be it pod.
45:33
[SPEAKER_00]: It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Leslie Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.
45:38
[SPEAKER_02]: It is transcribed, produced, and edited by the epic team at disenio.co.
45:43
[SPEAKER_00]: Our theme music is by Ellie at Apex production music, and our branding by designer and artist John Franco Chilfe.
45:50
[SPEAKER_02]: Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.
45:53
[SPEAKER_00]: Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website.
45:57
[SPEAKER_00]: And finally, the Meredith route for keeping us all on point and on time.