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Piece image How to Keep Going When Nothing Feels Motivating (S5) S25:E3: Mon · Inspirations for Your Life

0:24
Well, hello there, everyone.
0:26
Welcome to Inspirations for Your Life.
0:28
I'm so glad that you decided to join
0:30
me here today.
0:31
If this is your very first time here,
0:34
I want to take the opportunity to say
0:35
welcome.
0:36
And of course, I want to say thank
0:38
you.
0:39
If you've been here one time, five times,
0:41
10 times, 100, or even more, I like
0:44
to say not only thank you and welcome,
0:46
but I want to say the wonderful words,
0:48
welcome back.
0:50
Yes, guys, this is Inspirations for Your Life,
0:53
the daily motivational show that is here to
0:57
help you become a better version of yourself.
1:01
And you can always check out these shows
1:03
after the show by visiting BelieveMeAchieved.com.
1:08
You get my short form content, you get
1:09
my long form content, and so much more.
1:11
You definitely want to check that out after
1:14
the show is over.
1:15
And this week, we're talking about answering the
1:17
call.
1:18
No, I'm not talking about a telephone.
1:19
I'm talking about the call of your life,
1:21
the call of your dreams, the call of
1:23
your goals.
1:25
So without any further ado, guys, let's kick
1:27
this off.
1:28
But before I do, don't forget to get
1:30
yourself something like RO water or something like
1:32
that, or maybe a snack, a fruit or
1:36
beverage.
1:37
And today was a pretty fun day for
1:39
me and quite a few friends.
1:41
We went to see Big Boy 4014 and
1:44
4012.
1:45
So 4014, this is the first time the
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Union Pacific has brought the train up here
1:51
to Scranton, New Jersey, where I went this
1:53
morning, left very early, just got back a
1:55
little while ago.
1:56
And it was an amazing day.
1:57
And then we finished off in the restaurant
1:59
Tokyo with a hibachi lunch.
2:02
Yes, it was a lot of fun.
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It was probably close to 50,000 people
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there.
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They're going to do it again tomorrow.
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And you just got to walk and see
2:11
the trains and then you got to go
2:12
to the roundabout.
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So it was a lot of fun.
2:14
If you're a train enthusiast, you definitely want
2:16
to check up LeadMeAchieve.com.
2:18
I've got some videos there and there'll be
2:20
some more posted about it.
2:22
All right, guys.
2:23
So let's kick this show off.
2:24
All right.
2:24
So welcome back, everyone, to Inspirations For Your
2:27
Life.
2:28
This is, like I said, the daily motivational
2:31
show.
2:32
And ladies and gentlemen, this is the show
2:34
that helps you become the person.
2:38
Well, you were always meant to be and
2:40
you always wanted to be.
2:41
Who am I?
2:42
Oh, that's an awesome question.
2:44
So I am John C.
2:46
Morley, serial entrepreneur, engineer, marketing specialist, video producer,
2:51
podcast host, coach, passionate lifelong learner, keynote speaker.
2:57
Yes, a graduate student at Montclair State University.
3:00
And so grateful to now be a published
3:03
author.
3:04
This week, we're in our powerful series that
3:09
is Answering the Call.
3:11
And in that, today, we're going to be
3:16
talking about something pretty interesting.
3:18
Series 5, show 25, episode number 3.
3:23
But in episode 1, we talked about why
3:26
you were not meant for average.
3:28
In episode 2, we talked about why you
3:31
can't build a great life on self-shame.
3:34
Today, in episode 3, we're talking about something
3:38
most people never admit out loud.
3:41
You ready for that?
3:42
How do you keep going when nothing feels
3:45
motivating?
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I'm sure we've all had those times.
3:48
Maybe we don't want to share them.
3:49
But when we admit something, we're able to
3:52
acknowledge it.
3:54
And then we're able to figure out why
3:55
and change what we're doing.
3:58
When your life doesn't look inspirational, when your
4:02
routine feels messy, when your progress is real,
4:05
but unfortunately, it's invisible.
4:09
Yeah, that's a problem.
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If you've ever looked at your life and
4:13
thought, hey, this doesn't look like the success
4:18
stories I see online, maybe you're getting a
4:21
little bit disheartened.
4:23
Maybe I'm failing.
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This episode is exactly what you need, just
4:29
for you.
4:30
When life doesn't look motivational, most people don't
4:35
quit because the dream is impossible.
4:38
You know why they quit?
4:39
They quit because the process doesn't feel inspiring
4:42
anymore.
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You wake up tired.
4:44
Your to-do list is longer than your
4:46
energy level.
4:47
The results are barely visible.
4:50
And the only thing you know for sure
4:53
is this does not look like any motivational
4:57
video you've ever seen before.
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You see other people posting wins before and
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after photos, big announcements, perfect setups, much more.
5:08
Meanwhile, unfortunately, guys, you're behind the scenes.
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Looks like, well, half-finished projects on your
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desk, messages you still never can answer, a
5:23
body that feels worn out, a brain that
5:25
is just trying to get through the day.
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That's all it wants to do.
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So here's what happens, OK?
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You look at your real life.
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I got to get a sip of my
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RO water here.
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And you compare it to somebody else's final
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cut.
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And you decide, I'm not doing enough, not
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fast enough, not big enough, not impressive enough.
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Then you start waiting, waiting to feel motivated,
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waiting for, well, some kind of a sign,
6:03
ladies and gentlemen, waiting for a perfect moment,
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waiting for a life to look more worth
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the effort.
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Here's the hard truth.
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Are you ready, guys?
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If you only move when life looks motivational,
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you will not move very often because real
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growth rarely looks glamorous.
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While it's happening, that is, it looks like
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showing up to the gym when nobody is
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watching.
6:31
It looks like reading at night instead of
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scrolling.
6:34
It looks like sending that important email when
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you'd rather procrastinate.
6:40
It looks like going to bed on time
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instead of binging one more episode or another
6:48
ice cream cone.
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These are the moments that are not pretty.
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They do not get applause, unfortunately, guys.
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But they are where your future is quietly
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building and being built.
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You see, guys, motivation versus momentum.
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We've talked about this before.
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Let's clear something up right now, OK?
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Motivation is a feeling.
7:13
Momentum is a pattern.
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Motivation is a feeling.
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Momentum is a pattern.
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Motivation says, I like it, so I'll do
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it.
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Momentum says, I said it, I do it,
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so I will, whether I feel like it
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or not.
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Motivation is loud and exciting, but temporary.
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Momentum is quiet and boring, but powerful.
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If you live by motivation, you wake up
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and check your feelings before you check your
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commitments.
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Do I feel like working out?
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Do I feel like writing today?
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Do I feel like reaching out?
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If you live by momentum, you wake up
8:04
and check your identity.
8:06
Who am I today?
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What kind of person am I becoming?
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If you see yourself as someone who only
8:15
moves when it feels good, you'll stay stuck
8:18
for a long time.
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If you start seeing yourself as someone who
8:24
honors small commitments, even when it's messy, even
8:29
when you're tired, even when nobody sees it,
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even when you don't feel like it, you
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start to become unstoppable.
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Motivation might start the engine, but momentum keeps
8:42
the car moving.
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Even when the view is boring, even when
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the road feels long, you're not failing because
8:52
you don't always feel inspired.
8:54
You're learning how to move from feelings to
8:58
patterns.
9:00
And so let's get right into our rapid
9:03
fires because I think this is the most
9:05
important thing.
9:07
Reminders for messy middle days.
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This is really important, guys.
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I want to give you 30 rapid fire
9:13
reminders for the days when nothing feels motivating,
9:17
like you don't even feel like getting out
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of bed.
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You don't have to memorize all of them.
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That's the key.
9:23
But one of these is going to be
9:25
your line for today.
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Which one?
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Well, you can pick it out now, or
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you can choose to rewatch the show later
9:33
at BelieveMeAchieved.com.
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Number one, guys, you don't have to feel
9:37
motivated to make progress.
9:39
Action still counts, even when the feeling is
9:42
missing.
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Number two, boring consistency beats rare bursts of
9:49
inspiration.
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What you do regularly matters more than what
9:54
you do dramatically.
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A lot of people don't get that, though.
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Number three, your life doesn't have to look
10:02
inspiring to be something that moves forward in
10:06
progress.
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Because progress is usually quiet from the inside.
10:12
Number four, one small, honest step today is
10:17
better than 10 imaginary steps tomorrow.
10:20
Reality beats fantasy every single time.
10:24
Number five, ladies and gentlemen, you are allowed
10:29
to show up imperfectly and still count it.
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Done and imperfect still beat perfect.
10:37
Done and imperfect.
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And of course, undone.
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Number six, the days you feel least motivated
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often build your character the most.
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Anyone can move when it's easy.
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And I said before, guys, it's not always
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easy to move.
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It's not always comfortable.
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It's not painful.
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But it is, well, not comfortable.
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Number seven, you don't need a three-hour
11:05
routine.
11:06
You need a three-minute decision to start.
11:09
Number eight, you are closer than you think.
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But what you won't see is that if
11:17
you keep stopping every time it feels slow,
11:20
you're never going to see your victories.
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Number nine, feeling tired doesn't automatically mean you're
11:28
failing.
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It often means you're human and doing work
11:32
that matters.
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I think we've all felt that way, like,
11:36
oh my gosh, how am I going to
11:37
get to the bottom?
11:38
How am I going to finish this?
11:40
And when you realize you've got to give
11:42
yourself a break, that's very important.
11:45
You deserve a break.
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Number 10, you can lower the intensity without
11:50
abandoning the commitment.
11:53
Reduce the weight if you must, but keep
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the reps, right?
11:57
We're talking about working out.
11:59
But it could be anything else in life.
12:01
I'm just giving you workouts, as most people
12:02
understand that.
12:03
But it could be anything.
12:04
Maybe it's the fact that making X calls
12:09
is a lot for you.
12:10
But maybe you're going to drop it down.
12:11
But you're going to stay consistent.
12:13
I'd rather see someone that's making, let's say,
12:16
three to five reach outs a day than
12:19
somebody that's burning out trying to do 25
12:21
or 50 and then stopping by day 34.
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Number 11, a small win today can break
12:29
a big downward spiral.
12:31
Make the win tiny enough that you can't
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reasonably say no.
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A lot of people I know don't want
12:38
to celebrate those small wins.
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But you know what, guys?
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It's the small wins that get us to,
12:44
well, the promised land.
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Number 12, you are not behind.
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You're in the middle, the chapters in the
12:55
book, the middle between the front and the
12:56
end.
12:57
Nobody posts on social media this.
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But the middle of your life can be
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the messiest.
13:07
But it can also be the turning point
13:08
to whether you become a success, or you
13:11
stay where you are, or you regress.
13:14
Number 13, guys, motivation is a guest.
13:18
Momentum is a lifestyle.
13:20
Motivation is a guest.
13:22
Momentum is a lifestyle.
13:23
So motivation, like I said, can get the
13:25
engine going.
13:26
It has a good feeling.
13:27
But it's the momentum that causes the patterns
13:30
and that keeps you on track.
13:33
Number 14, you don't need to trust your
13:36
feelings to take your next step.
13:38
You need to trust your decision.
13:41
And I think decisions are hard for a
13:44
lot of people because they don't realize what's
13:46
going to happen, what's going to go on.
13:51
That's important, okay?
13:54
I think that's an important thing to understand,
14:03
to understand what that actually means.
14:07
Number 15, guys, even if nobody claps for
14:12
you, so what?
14:14
Progress is still progress.
14:16
Applause is a bonus.
14:18
Don't do it for the applause, not proof.
14:23
You're doing it for you.
14:25
That's what you're doing.
14:26
You're not doing it for any other reason.
14:28
You're not doing it to put on a
14:30
show, right?
14:32
You're not doing it for that purpose.
14:35
Number 16, you are allowed to make progress
14:40
privately.
14:41
You don't have to be on a big
14:42
glamorous stage.
14:44
Growth still counts even if it never becomes
14:47
content.
14:49
And there's a lot of things I do
14:51
in life, ladies and gentlemen that don't make
14:52
it to content.
14:53
I just don't feel that it's content that
14:55
it should be content.
14:56
I look for things that are going to
14:58
help inspire people.
14:59
I tell my true story.
15:02
Sometimes I share trials and tribulations, but I
15:04
tell people the way it is.
15:06
I don't paint a picture.
15:09
I tell it the way it is.
15:12
Number 17, guys, starting for five minutes is
15:16
more powerful than thinking about starting for five
15:21
hours.
15:22
You see, guys, your body and your brain,
15:27
they need proof, not promises.
15:31
You know, this is almost the same if
15:32
you're ever organizing an event.
15:33
How do you get people to come to
15:35
the event?
15:36
You need social proof.
15:37
How do you get social proof when nobody's
15:38
there?
15:40
Gotta get creative, right?
15:43
Gotta invite people.
15:44
You gotta do different things.
15:46
But you also have to stay grounded in
15:50
who you are, in the integrity you are.
15:53
This is why one of the groups that
15:55
I run, I call it Friendship First and
15:59
Integrity Always, which means there is no excuse
16:03
for skipping friendship.
16:06
There is no excuse for leaving integrity out
16:09
because, oh, I can't do that today.
16:12
No, there's no excuse for not having friendship.
16:16
There's no excuse for not living with integrity.
16:19
There's no excuse for any of that.
16:21
But yet people do it day in and
16:23
day out, and then they chastise you because
16:27
you won't skip ahead.
16:32
I feel like doing that is not just
16:35
cutting the corners, it's being dishonest, deceitful.
16:43
Number 18, you are not stuck.
16:49
You may think you are.
16:50
You're in a pause state.
16:52
And pause is a choice you can change.
16:58
You could pause tomorrow.
17:00
Stay paused for a day, stay paused for
17:02
a week.
17:03
You can choose when to unpause.
17:05
You can choose it, that's your choice.
17:07
Number 19, the routine that feels boring now
17:10
is building the life you say you want
17:12
later.
17:13
You see, repetition is not punishment.
17:17
People think it is, it's not.
17:18
It is the building blocks.
17:20
It's the construction that actually creates the life
17:23
that you've been wanting your entire life.
17:25
Let's take sports for a moment, right?
17:27
Maybe you're practicing every day after school, and
17:32
you're practicing at school with the team.
17:38
It feels like you're not getting anywhere.
17:40
But suddenly you have a breakthrough moment.
17:42
Maybe you catch the ball well, or you
17:45
pitch well, or you hit well.
17:48
It just sort of falls into place.
17:51
Number 20, you don't have to move fast.
17:56
You just have to keep not quitting.
18:01
And again, it's okay to pause.
18:03
Pausing is not quitting, guys.
18:06
I never said you couldn't take a pause.
18:08
I never said you couldn't have a rest,
18:09
okay?
18:10
That's an important thing for us all to
18:12
understand.
18:14
You can take a rest as much as
18:17
you want.
18:18
And I think you'll be more inclined to
18:23
wanna do things once you've had that rest.
18:29
Number 21, guys, the gap between where you
18:35
are right now and where you want to
18:38
be is usually filled with tiny habits, not
18:44
the giant breakthroughs.
18:47
And so when we do little things, it's
18:49
like I told you, I do certain reaches
18:51
out on LinkedIn and I make connections.
18:54
And you might say, John, what is that
18:55
gonna matter?
18:55
Every day I stay consistent and I send
18:57
out to so many people whether it's two,
18:59
three, four, five, whatever it is, I stay
19:01
consistent with that.
19:02
And I don't put a lot of stress
19:07
or worry on it.
19:08
People connect, they do, they don't, they don't.
19:12
And when they connect, I thank them.
19:16
And let's try to start a conversation.
19:19
I don't pitch them, that's what a lot
19:22
of people do.
19:23
I get a lot of people on LinkedIn.
19:25
Oh, John, you know, how are you doing
19:27
at XYZ company?
19:28
You know, we help you.
19:29
And I get this long three-page dissertation.
19:34
Usually I just block them and I say
19:35
not interested.
19:36
Sometimes I'll say, hey, you know, I'm gonna
19:39
give you a tip.
19:40
You can use it or not.
19:42
Otherwise you might just break another bridge and
19:44
destroy a relationship if you even care.
19:49
Most of them don't.
19:50
I usually tell them they should go take
19:52
a marketing class and I give them a
19:53
link to the class and a coupon to
19:57
an online class.
19:59
Number 22, you can reset your day at
20:03
any moment.
20:04
You do not have to wait for Monday
20:06
or next month.
20:07
We've said this before.
20:09
You don't have to wait till next year.
20:11
You can reset right now, right in your
20:14
car.
20:15
How many times can you reset the speedometer?
20:17
How many times do you want?
20:20
You can reset it before you start your
20:22
trip.
20:22
You can reset it after you fill up.
20:24
You could reset it when you finish your
20:26
trip.
20:26
You can reset it three times on the
20:28
trip, whatever you want, right?
20:30
So that means you can reset anytime you
20:33
want.
20:34
And just like you can reset your mileage,
20:38
odometer, not speedometer, your odometer, the odometer for
20:42
mileage, the mileage odometer, not the one that's
20:45
on the car that you can't change, the
20:46
one that's locked.
20:47
I'm talking about the one that just does
20:48
your miles for the trip, the trip odometer,
20:50
they call it the trip.
20:53
Yeah, but I think a lot of people,
20:56
they put pressure on themselves.
20:58
I did this, now I should get something.
21:01
That's why it's good to have a little
21:02
bit of a carefree attitude.
21:04
Because when you have the carefree attitude, it's
21:07
like things suddenly, they suddenly work for you.
21:12
They suddenly work for you.
21:14
That's a very, very important thing, guys.
21:17
Very, very important thing, right?
21:22
But you gotta be aware of that.
21:26
And know that you have permission to reset
21:28
anytime you want.
21:29
Number 23, guys, comparing your messy middle to
21:33
someone else's polished moment, always lie to you.
21:40
You are not seeing their full story.
21:45
It may look like it's the full story,
21:48
but you weren't there when they had their
21:49
messy middle.
21:51
The analogy I like to give, whether you're
21:53
a pet lover or not, was at a
21:56
friend's house, and let's say the dog goes
22:00
right for the door and opens the door.
22:01
I said, gee, what a smart dog.
22:04
Well, you wouldn't have thought that dog was
22:06
so smart if you were here a week
22:07
ago.
22:07
What do you mean?
22:08
Well, he was clawing at the door for
22:10
hours.
22:12
And then he had a breakthrough and suddenly
22:14
opened the door.
22:14
So we're gonna have trials and tribulations until
22:18
we have a breakthrough.
22:21
We also don't need to have public recognition
22:24
to celebrate or to have a breakthrough.
22:26
We don't.
22:28
Number 24, guys, doing something at 40%
22:33
effort is still better than doing nothing at
22:36
0%.
22:40
So many people say, oh, I'm not working
22:42
hard enough.
22:43
I don't care if you're working hard enough.
22:44
I want you to work consistently.
22:46
Even if you worked at 5%, it'd be
22:48
better than working at 0%.
22:52
Partial effort still moves the needle.
22:57
And what do I mean by the needle?
22:59
So there were things like applause-o-meters,
23:02
there were electric meters, and they weren't digital
23:05
many years ago.
23:06
They had a needle inside and some would
23:09
respond to, let's say, magnetism.
23:11
Some would respond to current, right, or volts.
23:18
So what moves the needle?
23:19
Some would move the needle based on sound,
23:22
right?
23:22
They'd have a microphone on.
23:23
So what is it that moves your needle?
23:26
And these things still move the needle.
23:30
Number 25, it is okay to rest.
23:35
Rest is different from quitting, as I've said.
23:38
People think if you're sitting down, you've given
23:41
up.
23:42
You haven't given down.
23:43
And I encourage you to rest.
23:46
I definitely encourage you to rest.
23:49
You know, build rest into your schedule, you
23:53
know?
23:53
I know I've done that lots of times.
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Sometimes I have a busy week and I
23:56
build rest in there.
23:58
I make sure I have rest.
24:00
Or maybe I was doing something, I had
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to get up early in the morning and
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I came back.
24:03
I'm like, you know what?
24:03
I need to have a rest.
24:07
And if you're afraid you're gonna oversleep, well,
24:08
set an alarm or something.
24:10
Usually you just get a couple hours of
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sleep or an hour of sleep that makes
24:13
a huge bit of difference.
24:15
And it's like this priceless reward that your
24:17
body gets like, yes, I get to rest.
24:21
Number 26, guys.
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You are allowed to have a low energy
24:26
day and still call it a win.
24:29
If you showed up at all, that matters,
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guys, right?
24:34
Maybe some of you have allergies and maybe
24:38
you can't do what you normally would do
24:40
because of the allergies, but you still tried.
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You still put some effort in and that's
24:46
something you should still celebrate.
24:49
Don't worry that you can't always deliver the
24:52
same amount.
24:53
You wanna be consistent, but if you fall
24:55
off because of some reason, maybe you're not
24:56
feeling well, maybe it's some outside circumstances, don't
25:00
allow that to set you on where you
25:08
only can be your go.
25:10
Number 27, guys.
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The fact that you are frustrated, you're not
25:15
further, proves that you still care.
25:18
See, that frustration can become fuel and that
25:23
fuel you can use to change your inputs
25:28
and then you'll get different outputs and you'll
25:31
get motivated and you'll wanna do more.
25:34
Number 28, guys.
25:36
You gain confidence by keeping small promises to
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yourself, not by waiting to magically feel confident,
25:44
not by waiting for that special moment, special
25:47
time, special place, okay?
25:51
You get confidence by doing the small things
25:56
and having the mini victories.
25:58
Don't worry that they're not the big victories,
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just celebrate the small victories right now, okay?
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That's important.
26:04
Number 29.
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Today does not have to be spectacular.
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It just has to be honest and full
26:12
of integrity.
26:14
You know, I remember when I started writing
26:16
my book a while back, I wasn't writing.
26:20
I was procrastinating outlining and suddenly I realized
26:23
I have to change this.
26:24
And then I just got playful with it
26:26
and then my book became easy.
26:30
I think too many of us put stress
26:32
on, oh my gosh, what if it's not
26:34
perfect?
26:35
What if I made a mistake?
26:39
Number 30, guys.
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You have survived every hard day so far
26:43
in your life.
26:43
If you are more capable of getting through
26:45
this one thing, then you actually think.
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Now, I wanna encourage you to be able
26:52
to pick one of these things.
26:54
Write it down, make it your sentence for
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today.
26:58
Three simple ways to keep going when you
27:00
feel nothing.
27:02
Now, let's make this practical.
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Here are three simple shifts to help you
27:09
keep going when nothing feels motivating.
27:11
Shift one, shrink the step, not the goal.
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Make it easier.
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On the low day energy days, most people
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shrink the goal to zero.
27:21
Just start again next week.
27:24
Instead, keep the goal, but shrink the step.
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Make it easier.
27:29
If the goal is to work out, make
27:31
today's step five minutes instead of doing 20.
27:34
If the goal is to write a book,
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make today's step one paragraph.
27:38
Well, I did mine as one chapter.
27:44
I had started at like one paragraph.
27:45
I said, I could do one chapter.
27:47
If the goal is to grow your business,
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make today's step one message or one reach
27:52
out.
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You keep the identity, you adjust the intensity.
27:58
Shift two, build one non-negotiable daily anchor.
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Choose one small habit that anchors who you
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are every single day.
28:07
It might be, oh, one, 10 minutes of
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learning, two, five minutes of movement, three, writing
28:14
three sentences, four, planning tomorrow before bed.
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And this anchor doesn't have to, ladies and
28:20
gentlemen, impress anyone.
28:22
It just has to be something you can
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do even on a bad day.
28:25
And that daily anchor is how you tell
28:27
yourself, no matter how I feel, I'm still
28:31
this kind of person.
28:33
And the last shift is decide your win
28:36
before the day starts.
28:38
Instead of letting your feelings decide whether today
28:41
was a good day, decide your win in
28:44
advance.
28:46
So if I do these one or two
28:49
small things, I'll call today a win.
28:51
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm John C.
28:52
Morley, serial entrepreneur.
28:53
Check out believemeachieve.com for more of my
28:54
amazing, inspiring creations.
28:56
We'll see you real soon, everyone.