Latest / Found-HER with Kimberley Hiebert / Finding Your Fulfillment

Transcript

Finding Your Fulfillment · Found-HER with Kimberley Hiebert

• 0:02
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to Found Her, the podcast for women who build empires, break barriers, and blaze trails all while fighting themselves.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_02: These are bestie level conversations from behind the scenes.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_02: The real work, the messy middle, and the wins that last.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_02: I'm Kimberly Hebert, founder, franchise builder, wife, mom, and Grammy, and a woman who has done the inner work while building the outer winds.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_02: Here we talk business, identity, relationships, and the kind of growth that cracks you open, then puts you back together.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_02: Stronger, better.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_02: This is your space to rise as a founder and as your truest self.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_02: Let's dive in.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_02: Hey besties! Today's guest is a guide for women ready to unlock what is possible in their body, mind, and spirit.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_02: With a master's in epidemiology and biostatistics, I know, right?
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_02: Brainiac, she began her career studying how disease shows up in populations, then followed her calling into healing and transformation work.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_02: Today she supports women entrepreneurs as a certified hypnotist, life coach, and spiritual mentor, helping them release old money stories, self-judgment, and the patterns that keep them small.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_02: I'm thrilled to welcome Binu Didsa to found her for a conversation about trusting your vibe, claiming your worth, and opening the door to your next level.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome, Bito.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for having me, Kim.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: This is so fun already.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_02: I know, it's so exciting.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_02: Hey, I love that we get a chance to really like kind of get to know each other on a different level.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_02: Like we said before, we press record.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_02: We have we circle a lot, we see each other a lot, support each other a lot, you know, um on socials and stuff.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_02: So thank you for um your time today.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_02: Is there anything else you'd like to say a little bit, give us a little bit more depth into a bit about who you are?
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I mean, that was a great intro.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_01: And it actually just wraps everything up.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_01: And it's so interesting.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: The one thing I like that when I'm listening to you, you know, what I did for school has all come back full circle.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like there is this trust piece that what we did when we were in our 20s, yeah, and now where I am in my 50s, it all has come full circle.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_01: Like maybe I'm not working in research anymore, but I'm kind of doing this research study in my head all the time in a different way.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, so I love that you brought that up immediately because, first of all, maybe we need to explain what epidemiology and biostats is, other than it sounds very academic.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_02: But before we go in there, I want to say this because people have said this to me.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_02: I was a social worker for 15 years.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I owned a variety of different businesses.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we have these different journeys all throughout.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_02: And and people always ask, how did you get to franchising in trades in a trades field?
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_02: And how do those things connect?
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_02: But they do.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_02: That's the thing is trusting that all those avenues, yes, you can pull from and help kind of create a fuller version of the experience and knowledge and integration of all that.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_02: So I love that that especially epidemiology.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_02: Do you want to tell us a little bit what that means in biofilm?
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, sure.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, and there's a part that there's in the middle that actually is part of it too.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_01: So epidemiology is if you look up the definition, it's the study of disease.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_01: And when I was in university, I was just good at math.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_01: Honestly, I was like, math and stats was easy to me, and yet I wanted to get to med school, but I didn't get in.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I didn't know that.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_01: You know, like every 20-year-old Indian girl out of other cultures, like you're told, you know, be a doctor, a lawyer, an engineer.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_01: And I just great, we all just want to help people.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_01: And because I had good marks, it's like, well, go to med school versus I don't know, something else.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_01: And so I didn't get in, and then one of my teachers was like, Oh, there's this program that mixes medicine and math.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_01: And it was this program called Epidemiology and Biostatistics.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: So it was perfect for me.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_01: So I did that.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_01: So that's what it was.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: So a lot of I work for women's college hospital here in Toronto, some pharmaceutical companies until you get to a point where literally, like, I'm like three kids in tow, yet sitting in a cubicle behind a desk, crunching numbers, going, What am I doing?
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_02: So that that kind of that leads me to uh you made a shift from epidemology and biostats to life coachings, you know, spiritual work.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: Not quite.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: I jumped so I first started a fitness business with Oh, there you go.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_02: I was just gonna ask, what was the middle piece?
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_02: What was the door?
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_02: I call it lily padding, you know.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_01: But what was well, it was it was the first coach I ever uh hired who was a friend when I was when I decided to leave the career because I had three kids and I thought, you know, in your mind, it's all just gonna be easy.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna show up in my business suit, they're all just gonna go to daycare, and everything else just works out.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_01: Anyways, I had super high stress and probably what everybody's like calling anxiety now.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: But back then it was like so high I needed to quit.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_01: And my girlfriend was like, like, what do you want to do?
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what lights you up?
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: This is the first time someone asked me, like, what actually lights you up?
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_01: And I was a fitness buff, and I just said, like, I'm either gonna teach math, like tutor math, or I just want to teach at the gym.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I just want to get my gym membership for free.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_01: So, long story short, I ended up running my own Zumba business and weightlifting class business.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember my dad saying to me once, like, okay, so you have a master's in epidemiology and you're teaching Zumba.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know what it was, Kim, but I had my response to him wasn't anger.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_01: It was like, Yes, dad, and one day it's all gonna make sense.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, and now here we are.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_02: Is this your one day?
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_01: Well, so what happened?
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_01: It was after a few years of running the fitness business, and I started realizing the conversations I'd have with the women at the end of the class.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I enjoyed more than teaching the class, hence the next bully pad.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: So then I was like, maybe I should do coaching.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_02: So let me ask you then, when especially as a female who's, you know, you like you said, you were good in math, you uh strived to be someone, what you know, whatever that means, and you put time and energy into achieving that.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_02: And then, you know, motherhood, you have motherhood as well.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_02: What how how do you reconcile and what uh I want to say allowed, but I'm gonna say created space?
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_02: That's kind of the more uh current language, but you know, how old are your kids?
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_02: They're in their 20s, right?
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, 19 to 24, yeah.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_02: So I mean, you're working a cur a professional job, it has to have a decent income attached to it.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and then with the three children and all that, how how did you make that?
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_02: How did you make that space?
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_02: You and your I'm guessing you're still married at the time.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know how did you guys make that space?
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_02: Because I think, you know, just for those listening, they're kind of there, some are in that spot, right?
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, how did you make that space for the possibility for you?
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's a good question.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_01: You know, what's coming to me is when we were a young couple without kids, so my husband works full-time, works, you know, the nine to five, really like the nine to seven job.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: And um, I was secondary income.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_01: So at that time, I remember when we moved into this house, he had said to me, Why don't we just rely on one income to buy this house in case you decide not to work?
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, I was like, Well, of course I'm gonna work.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_01: You're gonna work.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_01: What are you talking about?
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_01: But he is like it goes with his personality, he is very risk adverse.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_01: He is like, let's just be prepared.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_01: And so I'm so grateful for that because that opened up space for me.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: Like he's the one that said, you need to quit and you need to give them two weeks' notice because your stress is actually like impacting, infecting the children and our household, and it's like not good for all of us.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like he gave me permission, even that as a I don't know, even that I was like, Can I give them two weeks' notice?
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_01: He's like, That's what your contract says.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I was so stressed.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so he offered me that opening to just think about what you want to do.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_02: So isn't that beautiful?
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_02: And I think because people say that to me, I've had, you know, I've bought in businesses, I've changed careers, I've you know, all the and some people would say, like, you just can't focus on one thing, you know, like like I have a like that's a problem, right?
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_02: And and my husband on the other end is always like, do whatever makes whatever is gonna expand you and bring you to the what you think is right, is gonna benefit our family until you're because until you're done with it, yeah, right.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_02: And so kind of the same thing.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_02: He was like, I always say he was like this, and I was like, you know, up and down, up and down, doing all the things.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_02: Same kind of the same thing.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, for us, you know, we had um I homeschooled our kids, I stayed home, I was the primary caregiver, you know, we had a big gang of kids, and so you know, our financial situation, uh we same thing, we kind of didn't depend on both incomes for our life, full lifestyle.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_02: He always said I was the retirement project.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: He's like, that's a good term.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's a good term.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, you know, like, and I say that to my daughters now as they're raising young kids, right?
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_02: Like, yes, your earning potential when you have kids, sometimes your earning potential is capped for a while.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_02: I hate to say it, yeah.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_02: It can be.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but remember there will be a time when your kids are a 17, 18, whatever it is, that they don't require so much um management that your earning potential and stepping into those other things is there for you.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_02: But um, yeah.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_02: So anyway, I was just curious what created that space because I think a lot of times that's what holds people back, regardless, is like, how do I make that jump?
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_02: How do I choose me?
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_02: How do I choose something better?
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_02: So I love that you had already that support, even though you didn't realize it from the very beginning, the way you guys started your journey together.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_02: I think that that's um that's really beautiful.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: You know, and I love to hear that about you as well because that actually, because I've only met you when I've seen your like super successful businesses.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_01: And so it's interesting to hear that because I also feel like, yeah, the choosing me without realizing that I was consciously choosing me, but didn't we also have to like unravel all these?
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: I just had this conversation about worthiness with one of my clients.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_01: And like the work was my worth that that title was my worth.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: And so part of the journey was who am I without this?
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: And I was that, I I don't know what it was in me, but I had an issue with myself like just staying home and not having anything else to have my finger in.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_01: And now when I think back, I probably was in a little bit of self-judgment and judging other people.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_01: But now I'm like, I think it's just my personality.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_01: It's I needed that fulfillment piece for myself.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_02: So let me let me ask you this going from because I I talk to a lot of entrepreneurs, not even not on just on the podcast, just in general, that you know, have this real kind of great career or business and something is shifting, and they're not willing to to take a side step.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_02: It's like the it's like we think the next step is always quote unquote higher.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_02: Or so when you went from master's and studying, you know, women's health and disease, you know, I know you say in a cubicle, but it's still a pretty esteemed role, like comes with like the the credibility to a Zumba instructor.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_02: Was there a like ego piece?
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_02: Uh like I'm you know, how and then how did you you mentioned at the beginning that you, you know, an Indian family, how did that go across with your family, let's say, in terms of culturally, right?
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so it's it's twofold, actually, right?
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_01: It was more, I think the ego issue was more within myself.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's it.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: I always had this huge um belief.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_01: So I was one one girl between two boys, and I love my parents, I love my dad.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but my dad always would say things like, Well, it's more important that the boys get an education.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_01: Like he encouraged me to get that education.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: I actually um have a half a PhD actually that I stopped after I had my first child.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_01: But he didn't stop me from that, but he always would drip these things of like, but it's more important that they have their edge, and it used to piss me off.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if we're allowed to swear, it used to really tick me off.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I had this drive of like, well, I'm just gonna show him, right?
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and so it's interesting that it's like yeah, yeah.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_01: See, a little bit of yeah, the ego was me that even though when I but it was like it was, it was one step at a time where I think in the first year, so I took about 10 months off after I quit, it was almost like another maternity leave.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_01: But then that's when the that's when the inner ache came, like that I'm not good enough unless I have something for myself.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_01: So at first it started run this fitness business.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like literally, when I started teaching at LA Fitness, I think I made$18 a class.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_01: And I had to just justify within my head, I am contributing financially by getting a free membership, by blah, blah, blah.
• 13:33
  unknown: Right.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_01: Not paying for daycare, right?
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_01: But then after the second year, because now that becomes the norm.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_02: That becomes the norm now, right?
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and then that's where the outs, like the ego was more being affected, like I was I was fearing judgment from other people, right?
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like my my friends who were driving up the ladder and somehow on the outside looked like they were all figuring it out, but they weren't.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: Um, right?
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_02: That's the biggest kept secret, right?
• 14:03
  unknown: Yeah.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_01: And so I kept there's so much.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like I didn't feel good enough.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I had to quit.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_01: Like I couldn't handle it.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_01: They can handle it.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_01: Well, 10 years later, they crashed, they burned out, right?
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_01: So it was, it was a bit, but there was something inside of me, Kim.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_01: And I think I think when I think back, I think I was really good at saying yes to when other people wanted to coach me.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_01: I wasn't, I wasn't yeah, I wasn't great at asking for help.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just realizing this.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_01: However, when some of my friends were becoming life coaches and they wanted to practice on me, oh okay, I would say yes.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_02: Because what was drawing you in?
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_01: So I thought it's funny, it's coming to me.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_01: I think I said yes because I think I thought I had no problems.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_01: I thought, oh, this is your guinea pig.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_01: I got it all figured out.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, and then and then they kind of hit on something.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think the first coffee shop meeting I had with this friend of mine that's a coach, I started crying.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: And all this, I laugh about it now, but I think all that needed to happen in order for all that crap to get released and go, oh my gosh, what am I doing?
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_01: I'm feeling lack, I'm feeling like I'm not contributing.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_01: Who am I?
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I I think what happens, I I just like reflecting as you say that on some of my experiences that are similar, is that we tend to, especially because you're a brainiac, we tend to be able to like rationalize our academic our way through kind of transition and what we might be feeling.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_02: But we were, you know, I I say this about, you know, I had a very, very traumatic childhood.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_02: And I know that it's very, it's it, I know that, and it had a lot of mother wound, but but take me back, you know, 20, well now, poof, 30 years ago, when I was going through my degree as in social work, we had to do a lot of work on ourselves, right?
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_02: Aware, self-awareness, communication, being aware of our triggers, like all that kind of stuff.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_02: So I had kind of put myself through a process of coming to understand my relationship with my mother based on this severe trauma.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_02: And I had worked my way through it in my head.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_02: And I felt good about it in my heart because there was some tender moments, but I worked through it and I could tell the story and I could, you know, be with my mom in ways that didn't create such such hurt and heartache and emotional reaction and all that kind of stuff.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_02: So I felt like I gotta, I I figured it out.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_02: I uh right and then I got I'm good.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, I don't know what and everybody would, you know, when you hear the story or was like, oh, blah, blah, blah.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, no, it's all we're like, we we've worked through all this.
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_02: And then I got diagnosed with cancer.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_02: And through that journey, when you say the study of disease, that's what happened, is I started to study disease, right?
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_02: I wasn't a master's in epidemiology or anything like that, but I started to get curious about how disease is created in the body, cancer specifically in cells, which led me into this like healing journey on a next level.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_02: And it was in that process that um my healer, I call her, she asked me one question.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_02: She had never met me.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_02: I was laying on her table, she was doing some acupuncture.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_02: She asked me one question, and I came, and she didn't even know how unglued I came internally.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_02: That I just started to ball.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_02: And it was like a, you know, back in the day when you would make cartoons on a piece of a bunch of paper and you'd flick it, and it would look like the cartoon is running.
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_02: So I had that like that go through my head of my first 13 years, because she said, What happened when you were 13?
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_02: And and to your point, it was that that crumbled me and opened me up to the the kind of heart healing that was different than the head healing.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, Yes, back to the mother wound.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, Mother, ever.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_02: I thought I had worked my way around it, but I I had just used my brain through it.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and it keeps happening.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, thank you for sharing that with me because you reminded me of why I actually went into that field was because my mom getting cancer and her not surviving very long with it.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_01: So she passed when I was 20.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_01: And when you said that, it's like that's where it's because then I went and volunteered at the cancer agency where she was, and I had this in my head.
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_01: I have to eradicate disease.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_01: Like it was like this, like very young, like, I gotta figure this out.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_01: So when you said that, it actually just reminded me of like where these things come from.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_02: They come from our interactions.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_01: And then it's like, I swear, even last week, I unraveled something else like from 30 years ago that I even that I've like, I think I've healed from my mom dying when she was 47, I was 20.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_01: And something showed up, and it wasn't in a negative way, it actually was more of like why my mission is my mission, why I'm so passionate now about what I'm doing.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_01: And that was like the new drive.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_01: I can't remember what it was, but I was like, ooh, there's a piece that just got unlocked.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and that I was gonna ask you like, this is what I'm saying.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I feel like my soul's journey is really as much as I don't want it to be, because I keep coming back to the mother wound.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_02: And not to I I kind of roll my eyes because you know, the cliche, the mother wound.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_02: And it's not that I'm like so dysfunctional that my mother wound has leave me like, but there are like so right now, and I I wanted to ask you about ceilings and limits.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_02: Like, one of the limits I'm having right now in my season of being a founder and building a hundred million million dollar brand, one of the limits has to do with enoughness.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_02: And I have an episode coming out in a few weeks.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_02: Well, by the time this one comes out, it'll be already out.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_02: Forgetting I'm so into like us talking, but it's about enoughness and really understanding that the enoughness is a feeling I'm searching for, even though it's being driven by money because the money is the catalyst.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm like, where is this coming from?
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_02: Where is this enoughness?
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_02: Because I'm like, okay, how much money do we need to make this go?
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_02: Right?
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_02: How much is enough?
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_02: I actually asking that question to my husband, to some of my advisors.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_02: And then I was in an event and it came, it talked about we had a little picture of, you know, Little Kim and this picture about like what what does she need?
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_02: What is enough for her?
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_02: And it all kind of like that's what I'm seeking.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_02: I'm seeking the enoughness, which of course brings me back to where do we learn all this?
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_02: Where when does all this get compromised?
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_02: It's the experiences we have, right?
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_02: When did I learn I wasn't enough when my mother left me?
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_01: And honestly, Kim, underneath, like, thank you for sharing that because I think this is so real.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I mean.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_01: It you have this huge goal, yet your goal can only keep growing at the extent that the foundation, the foundational leaks are all like cleared up, right?
• 21:20
  SPEAKER_01: And we don't know it's there until we go after the next big thing.
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, ooh, why is this showing up again?
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_01: But underneath like all the coaching I've done, and I know you know this, it's like underneath everything, whenever I'm working with somebody, and it's like, oh, well, where'd that come from?
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so what's underneath that?
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_01: We know what's underneath all of it.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_01: It's this, am I enough?
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_01: And it shows up with all these different costumes.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_02: One, yeah.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_02: And so I find it funny because I'm like, is it just me that's always on this?
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_02: I find myself back to the mother wound.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_02: I kind of laugh all the time.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_02: There's a book called called Mother Hunger.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I don't know if you've heard of it, but it's what happens.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_02: To adult daughters when nurture, protection, and guidance is missing or held withheld.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_02: Because fun fact, I I adopted two daughters that, funny enough, have the exact same mother wound, abandonment.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_02: Mine was abandonment and protection, but my daughters, theirs are abandonment by their mother.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_02: I adopted them.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_02: And this was unbeknownst to me.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't see this as a similarity back 30 years ago, 32 years ago, right?
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't see that similarity.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_02: You think you're aware of what's happening, but there's a whole filter and pattern happening with your energy and the loops that you're you and it's almost like the Truman show.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_02: And when you and recently, because my daughters are struggling with their relationship, and I'm like, how can I help these two find each other?
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_02: Because my sister and I have gone through the same thing.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_02: And it's this is how I found the mother hunger book, because it's about adult daughters and this resource being withheld for whatever reasons and how that it sets them up to turn on each other.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_02: And so as I'm trying to kind of navigate, this is how I keep coming back to the mother thing.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_02: I'm like, my soul's journey is is helping others through the mother wound.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_02: I know that.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_02: Like I'm building a big epic legacy in the franchise, but that's just my on earth.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_02: But my my my soul's journey, and but building this franchise is guess what?
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_02: Leading me to those places.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, is that why Kim and I were supposed to be connected?
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_01: Because this soul's journey of like, I feel like I'm on the very similar, like at one point I thought, am I supposed to be the grief coach for all these women that lose their moms?
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_01: I actually at one point that's what I was doing.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_01: And then I moved, but I keep attracting women that either, just like you said, have that mother wound.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, it's funny, I came across another book that was actually called Divine Mother, Divine Father.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_01: And this is what helped me the most and still continues to help me.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_01: And again, it's similar but different.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_01: But it was more about this the divine mother.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_01: So we all are supposed to have in the perfect world, we're all supposed to have this mother that nurtures us.
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_01: And then the the father, divine father is supposed to be the protector.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_01: That's what that book said.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_01: And so when your mother either is distant or not uh alive, but not present or dies, the nurturing is gone.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_01: And if your dad's there, not there, the protection's gone.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I remember this coach said to me, So, your job here now in this world is to learn to nurture yourself.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_01: It sounds so simple, doesn't it?
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody told me.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_01: And when I heard that, I'm like, I've been searching, I had so many issues with telling anybody but my husband and my kids that I love them, and I couldn't understand why.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_01: My girlfriends that would say I love you, I couldn't say it back.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like that was part of my journey to go, oh my gosh, I need to like cliche love myself, but it's actually so that you can love others.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_01: I know it's that's incredible to me, actually.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_02: It blows me away because that's what I mean about the brain smarts, is we think we're smart.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_02: We think, and if I uh you know, going back to that moment on the table, and after it was a couple of weeks later that I actually explained it to my my healer because she didn't know, she had no idea what happened on the inside, right?
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_02: And I was bawling, but it that was so that was now eight years ago, and I think that was my first real understanding that no matter how smart I think I am and making good choices and choosing this and choosing that, there is an absolute program at play that I I was a puppet in and didn't, and and it was this whole journey into cancer that made me finally lift and have that awareness to lift that seal to so I could see things down.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, oh my gosh, had I known some of this earlier in life, yeah, would I have made different choices?
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, right?
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_02: Because you you the filters are, you know, the filter gets removed, right?
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_02: I spent this is uh sorry, this podcast seems to be all about me.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_02: I feel it's therapy session.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_01: I love this.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um this is amazing.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so at 13, after I had suffered a serious event uh at the hands of my mother and her partner, I was um hospitalized for a while and then I was removed from our home.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_02: But I had a younger sister and a brother that were there at the same time.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_02: And um, my younger sister, she's five years younger, she uh after I was healed, um, I went and stole her from our school, from her school.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, right, to protect her, to bring her with me, because of course I had this horrific experience.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_02: So that happened when I was 13.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, so now fast forward to me being 50, and I'm laying on 51, I'm laying on the table, and this girl says to me, Hey, what happened when you were 13?
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, So I go, Oh, you know, this trauma happened, like I was put in a coma, like blah, blah, blah.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_02: And she goes, because that's typically what I think of the trauma.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_02: She goes, No, I'm not talking about that.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_02: I'm talking about with your sister.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, and in that moment, what happened?
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_02: Like I said, that little that little cartoon book, I'd spent 15 years as a social worker doing child protection.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_01: Of course you did.
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_02: Right?
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_02: And I I knew I was a social worker because I had a social worker.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_02: I rationalized that and I could see that, but I could not see that I had just spent, and this makes me cry every time I spent 15 years trying to save my sister and myself.
• 27:47
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and so when you like in in that moment, I was like, wow, that's how powerful our circumstances are in building those unconscious, subconscious, and so I think that's why uh breaking through and just have that um curiosity to see what is the energy versus what is like what what can you see?
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, because it's like the the soul's journey part that you just described, and like I I love that like the tears are coming up because this is all like I always say it's okay to cry.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_01: That was supposed to be my first book because all the people would tell me stop crying, but it's like this is real.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: That's another cultural thing too.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_01: It's like when somebody dies, they tell you to stop crying after a year, you're supposed to be done.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, supposed to be done.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_02: My sister, my sister does that too, but for the native.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's I think it's like it's cultural or it's societal.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but what you just said, it's like, yeah, that you were guided there.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I do think this is like where my spiritual piece feels so strong.
• 28:55
  SPEAKER_01: You were guided to do that work to heal your inner child and your and your sister all over again, right?
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_01: Like right the message I have, and I was kind of curious with you, like through those experiences.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_01: So, first I just want to like people who are listening to this, it's like your story, Kim, where you can just sit here and and talk about it.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I want people to know this is like what they call the hero's journey.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_01: It's like you go through something, there is a way through, right?
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I think we're just so resistant to to releasing that there is one.
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_01: But I was like, I I wonder like what's the message?
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_01: Because that's the other piece for me that has been healing.
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_01: It's like to live out this purpose that I think losing my mom or my mom's journey of what she wasn't able to do.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_01: So there's been this message that, oh, why did she die?
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_01: Why did I have to lose my mom when she was 20?
• 29:54
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, when I was 20.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like I've always had this speak up, like I just hear it.
• 29:59
  SPEAKER_01: So whether you say it's like my guides or whatever, it's like teaching women to speak up for themselves because my mom never could.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm kind of like, you've had that social working experience to do something that you and your sister weren't able to have.
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_01: And so I have that now, and that is, I'd say in the last four years has become a lot stronger.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_01: Where I think before I was back here, and now it's like this message is so strong to help women speak up, even just what we're talking about, not even about business, but no, do speak up for themselves.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_02: Wow, this has been a great car.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_02: I like I said, I feel like I've had therapy.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_02: No, and and funny because I had some I had I had some questions here, but when when I look down at the questions and look at what we talked about, they literally are aligned.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_02: There's that word again, aligned, right?
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_02: Because it's it's really meant to this is the stuff I geek out on.
• 30:50
  SPEAKER_02: Um, I love business, I love strategy, I love building legacy, I love helping others expand.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_02: I was a social worker for 15 years.
• 30:56
  SPEAKER_02: My whole thing is to help people.
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_02: I just got I got burnt out helping in the front line.
• 31:00
  SPEAKER_02: And so for me, I was the transition to how do I help, right?
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_02: I can help people by helping them change their economic status, right?
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_02: Helping them build a legacy within business, things like that.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_02: But this is the stuff I truly, truly geek out on.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_02: Um, because to me, this is the journey.
• 31:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_02: This is you know, yeah.
• 31:19
  unknown: Right.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_01: What good is all the success if inside we haven't cleared, healed the things that you can't see?
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah because I actually think I'm sure if I was to ask you, all this healing we've done, it's like that and the business success.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_01: That's what feels so good.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_01: But if we had all this success in business yet felt broke inside and dead inside, that to me is not living this extraordinary life that I think we're supposed to be here to learn.
• 31:45
  SPEAKER_02: Awesome.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_02: So, okay, a couple things.
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_02: I want to wow, the time has gone by fast.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_02: We'll have to have a part two on my podcast.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_02: I'll have to yeah, let's do that.
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_02: Let's do that.
• 31:54
  SPEAKER_02: So, okay, just to kind of lighten the mood because I got real deep and uh thank you for holding that space for me.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, this is the podcast to shine you, but that also does that.
• 32:03
  SPEAKER_02: People get to see your energy and spirit or hear and feel that.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_02: So I love that.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_02: A couple of lightning round questions, just fun stuff, okay, just to make it a little lighthearted.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, coffee, tea, or what do you kick off the morning with?
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_01: Coffee.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, look, coffee, coffee.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_02: Sneakers or heels for your power day.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_02: Heels.
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah, I know, right?
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_02: It is.
• 32:26
  SPEAKER_02: It's always the heels.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_02: I say this about sneakers.
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_02: My friends, they laugh at me, but when I wear, I, you know, you see women all cute, even in wedding dresses, wearing sneakers, and you see, you know, people all done up and cute little sneakers.
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_02: Anytime I wear sneakers, I feel like I should be on a baseball field or at a gym, or I'm like with my I'm eight years old with my brothers running down the street.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_02: I just feel like a kid.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_01: And so I think how you ask that, because you asked on your power day.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's where my head went.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_01: And it's actually not just heels.
• 32:59
  SPEAKER_01: I have these black boots with a certain level of like heel.
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_01: And they're like it's that.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_01: I feel powerful.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I'm Wonder Woman when I'm wearing those.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_02: I love it.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_02: I I and yeah, it's that connection, right?
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_02: Right from the ground up, it's that grounding.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_02: So I love that.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_02: Um, which word describes you today and why?
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_01: The word that's coming to me is calm.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_01: And why?
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know, because I've had to work hard to get from a very angry, internal angry woman to a very calm.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_01: And why?
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_01: Because I think when I'm calm and still, that's actually my foundation for my next big leap.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_02: See, that was one of my questions that I didn't ask.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_02: So that's good.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_02: That's what I mean.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_02: This is all really lied.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_02: If there was a soundtrack that was for your life, what would be one song that would be for sure on it that would represent you or your life?
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_01: Well, there's this song I'm listening to a lot.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so there's two.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_01: One is Unstoppable by C.
• 34:03
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yes.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_01: The other one, I don't know who the artist is.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's called Manifesting Dreams.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_01: Oh.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know what it is.
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I can feel the vibration.
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, and the third one is the just a dream by uh Nelly.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_01: And my husband keeps saying it has a whole other meaning than what you think.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, I don't care.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_01: I can feel the vibration.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, it's like I have this big thing, like live your daydream.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, yeah, yeah.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_01: So it's just a dream, but it's like, yeah, have the dream and live it out and don't stop.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_02: Awesome.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_02: We'll leave that.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_02: We'll pull that, we'll pull that as a clip.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for your time today.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_02: Um, it was really wonderful opening up, um, sharing uh a little bit of our journey.
• 34:49
  SPEAKER_02: I sorry for the loss of your mom.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_02: That thanks, Kim.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_02: Those are just those are hard moments.
• 34:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I don't think it matters how old you are.
• 34:59
  SPEAKER_02: Uh so oh uh anyway, uh, thank you again for your time.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_02: And I hope you come back for a second.
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_01: I would love that.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 35:08
  SPEAKER_01: We're gonna we're gonna podcast swap because I this was such a great conversation.
• 35:12
  SPEAKER_01: I wanna I want to do a dive deep dive into the whole founder because um yeah, that's I just it's such an important message.
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, awesome.
• 35:20
  SPEAKER_02: So, Abino, where can people find you?
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_02: How can they learn more about you?
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_02: How do you support women?
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_01: So, yeah, so Instagram.
• 35:27
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I love being a 54-year-old woman that is all over Instagram and uh teaching other women to be seen and show up in the same way in their own way.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_01: I yeah, that's really what I have a website, spinu.ca.
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_01: I run an event with a girlfriend in um in 2026 called manifest her.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm big on teaching people just to manifest from that kind of spiritual practical connection place, yeah, and to really live this limitless limitless life.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_01: I believe in that we can just like bust all the limits, but we got to do all this inner work as we as we shift.
• 36:01
  SPEAKER_01: So that's awesome.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_02: I will make sure all of your links are in the podcast notes.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_02: So amazing.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you, Katie.
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for your time today.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much for listening to this episode of the Found Her podcast.
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_02: If you've enjoyed it, please, please, please leave me a review, subscribe so you don't miss any future episodes, and more importantly, please share with your business bestie.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_02: You can join our newsletter, find me on Instagram, all the places I would love to hear your feedback and connect with you during your journey of building your legacy.