Wallet Therapy: The Bank Said Yes. Should You?

For The Hayters: The Stories We Survive · Aug 27, 2026 · 30m

I had to pull cash out of my savings this week to pay for a patio, because apparently some people still only take cash in the year of our lord. So I am feeling some feelings about housing costs. Meanwhile Alex is under contract on a house, I just moved into a smaller one, and we both learned the same lesson from opposite directions: getting approved for a mortgage and being able to live comfortably with it are two completely different things.

The Solution

Approval is not a plan. The bank is measuring risk to the bank. It has no idea whether you want kids, want to retire early, or want to…