Latest / Chip Ingram Sermon Podcast / The Power of Spiritual Training in the Transformation Process

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The Power of Spiritual Training in the Transformation Process · Chip Ingram Sermon Podcast

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Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram.
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You know, once a person makes a commitment to
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follow Christ, I mean radical and all indecision,
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there's a process God uses to transform us. Well,
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today I'm going to address what I believe is
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one of the most neglected areas of spiritual
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growth. Because once we're aware and willing
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to engage, it results in amazing life change.
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Stay with me. What if the secret to lasting change
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isn't a longer to -do list, but a completely
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different kind of list? A to -be list. I'm Dave
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Drew, and this is Living on the Edge with Chip
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Ingram. We're continuing our series called Free
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at Last, How to Break Out of a Destructive Lifestyle.
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And if you've missed any part so far, you can
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always catch up online at livingontheedge .org.
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Today, Chip gets very practical about two areas
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where spiritual training changes everything.
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hard work, and the words that come out of your
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mouth. Now here's Chip with today's message titled,
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The Power of Spiritual Training in the Transformation
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Process. Listen carefully. Only God can transform
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a life. Only by God's supernatural grace can
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a life be authentically changed from the inside
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out. But he chooses to never do it alone. It's
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a joint effort. Transformation, the miracle of
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life change, everything we've talked about is
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a joint effort. It's completely and fully by
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grace, but we have a part. Notice that even in
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nature, God points this out. I came across an
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article, talks about a man who found a cocoon
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of a butterfly, and one day he saw a small opening
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appear. He sat and he watched the butterfly for
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several hours as it struggled to force its body
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through that small little hole. Then it seemed
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to stop making any progress. It appeared as if
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it had gotten as far as it could and could get
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no farther. So the man decided to help the butterfly.
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He took a pair of scissors and he snipped the
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remaining bit of the cocoon and then the butterfly
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easily emerged. But it had a swollen body and
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small shriveled wings. The man continued to watch
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the butterfly because he expected that any moment
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its wings would expand and it would fly off.
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But it didn't happen. In fact, the butterfly
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spent the rest of its life crawling around with
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a swollen body and shriveled wings. It was never
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able to fly. What the man in his kindness and
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haste did not understand was the restricting
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cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly.
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Through that tiny little opening was God's way
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of forcing the fluid from the body down into
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the butterfly's wings so that it would be ready
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for flight once it achieved its freedom from
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the cocoon. See, God made the caterpillar, that
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green worm, if you will. That green worm had
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exactly the same DNA as the butterfly. That DNA
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told that caterpillar when and what season to
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go to on that milkweed, when to form a cocoon,
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and it's all the DNA inside of that that created
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from this caterpillar into a butterfly. But there
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came a time of struggle and responsibility for
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metamorphosis to occur where that butterfly had
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to make every effort and struggle to cooperate
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with its design in order to fulfill its purpose.
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And the exact same thing is true of us. Open
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your Bibles, if you will, do a quick review before
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we jump in to Ephesians chapter four. Let's go
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all the way back to the beginning of this series.
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Chapters one, two, and three is the DNA that
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God has put us, all that he has done for us in
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Christ. Chapter four opens up where he begins
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to talk about our responsibility. He says, as
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a prisoner of the Lord, then I urge you. to live
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a life worthy of the calling that you received.
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And then he begins to describe what it looks
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like in relationships. Be completely humble and
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gentle and patient, bearing with one another
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in love. And then notice, make every effort to
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keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond
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of peace. Then we talked about... What Christ
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has accomplished. We talked about the role of
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the church. We talked about that sort of three
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-fold process where we put off, have your mind
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renewed and put on. And then pick it up with
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me in verse 25 as the Apostle Paul goes through
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five specific training stations. Therefore, each
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of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully
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to his neighbor. For we're all members of one
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body. We talked about be honest. You go into
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training for integrity. In your anger, do not
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sin. Do not let the sun go down on your anger.
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And do not give the devil a foothold. And then
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he goes on. He who has been stealing must steal
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no longer, but must work with your hands doing
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something useful that he may have something to
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share with those in need. Do not let any unwholesome
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talk come out of your mouths, but only what's
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helpful, the building up of others according
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to their needs, that it may benefit those who
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listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of
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God. with whom you were sealed for the day of
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redemption. Get rid of all bitterness and rage
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and anger and brawling and slander along with
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every form of malice and be kind, compassionate
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to one another, forgiving one another just as
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God in Christ also has forgiven you. Now, I want
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you to see this combination. Psalm 77, 14 says,
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you are the God who performs miracles. You display
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your power among the people. God does miracles.
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He's done them in the past. He does them today.
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That's God's part, the supernatural. He does
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miracles among us. But look at the next passage
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in Romans 8. He does miracles in us. The spirit
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of God who raised Jesus from the dead, amazingly,
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lives in you. Therefore, dear brothers and sisters,
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you have no obligation to do what your sinful
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nature urges you to do. God does miracles in
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the world. He parts red seas. He's raised people
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from the dead, but he doesn't just do miracles
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among us. He does miracles in us. The same spirit
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that raised Christ from the dead, when you put
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your faith in him, dwells inside of you. We don't
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have to sin anymore. We will, we will have struggles.
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But you've been forgiven. The penalty of sin's
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been paid. The power of sin has been broken.
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And now the spirit of the living God that created
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all that there is, if you're a follower of Jesus,
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lives inside of you. That's God's part. Now notice
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the apostle Paul says, but that's not how it
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all works. Philippians chapter four, he says,
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I can do, that's something he does, I can do
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all things, but how? Through Christ who gives
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me strength. In fact, the next passage in Philippians
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2, he kind of puts the whole package together.
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There's God's part, there's our part, there's
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dependency, it's all of grace, and yet we have
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to make every effort. And so he commands us,
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work out your salvation with fear and trembling.
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Then notice the second half. For it is God who
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is at work in you, both to will and to work for
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his good pleasure. Be diligent. Work hard. Refuse
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to take shortcuts. It says, he who steals must
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steal no longer, but rather he must labor, performing
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with his own hands what is good. Then notice
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the purpose clause. So that he may have something
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to share with the one who has need. Training
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objective is financial stewardship and rooted
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in this is our work ethic. The training command
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is steal no longer. Grammatically, he's saying,
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people in this particular church were stealing.
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Grammatically, it's stop stealing, knock it off.
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Stealing was rampant in the ancient world. Now,
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I think it's same today. But when people would
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go to the Roman baths and they would leave their
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clothes and their valuables or when they went
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to the market. So Christians, they came to Christ
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in the city, but it was a habitual pattern. And
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they would steal, so he stopped stealing. The
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training action is you're to put off stealing.
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Then there's a renewal of your mind. Recognize
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the value and the purpose of work. Recognize
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the value and the purpose of work. And then what
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we're gonna see in just a minute, he's gonna
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say, stop stealing. Recognize the value of work
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and the purpose of work. And then he says, now
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I want you to put on, I want you to learn to
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work. or to labor, and he's talking about real
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physical labor here, but unto the Lord. I want
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you to work as though you're working for an audience
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of one. So let's back up and think through just
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a little bit. The issue behind stealing, obviously,
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I'm guessing that there's not a lot of you that
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are going, oh, my lands, you know. Friday night,
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I held up that guy at the ATM. I've just got
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to knock that off, you know? I didn't use a knife
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or anything. It was a plastic gun, but I just
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gotta quit doing that, you know? Or, you know,
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hopefully there's not like just a handful of
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you that are saying, you know, it's tax time
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and I've embezzled a few thousand dollars or
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a few hundred thousand dollars and I'm glad I
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came today because I need to repent of that.
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Now, by the way, if you're stealing in those
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ways, for sure, you need to repent from that.
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But we steal in lots of ways. See, behind stealing
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is the real thing that needs to be addressed
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for most of us is the shortcut mentality. See,
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at the end of the day, if you went to work for
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two weeks and they put X numbers of dollars out
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of your paycheck in a bank account, and then
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you want to go to dinner or go shopping and you
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go to an ATM and you pull out $100 because that
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represents what you've worked. And as you take
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that $100 out, someone stops you and either puts
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a gun or a knife to your throat and says, give
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me your money. Number one, give it to them. Heroes
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end up dead. But you did the work. They took
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your money. At the heart of stealing is we want
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the product without the process. We want the
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product without the price. And for many of you,
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the stealing is not about money and the stealing
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isn't in your vocational work. A lot of us want
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a really great marriage. but we don't want to
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put in the work. A lot of us want kids that really
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love God and turn out well and tell the truth
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and have great relationships, but we don't spend
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any time with them around the table. We don't
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tuck them in bed. We don't teach them. A lot
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of us really want our bodies to be low in cholesterol
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and low in fat, and we want to be healthy and
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live long lives. We just don't want to do the
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hard work of working out or watching what we
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eat. You get the idea? A lot of us has overwhelming
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jobs with demand, demand, demand, demand. And
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we steal from relationships and we steal from
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other areas to fulfill responsibilities and jobs
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to either please people or be addicted to the
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income that it brings. See, now stealing has
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a lot to do with all of us, doesn't it? Now,
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here's what you need to understand. You need
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to understand the value of work. The value of
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diligence. Before sin entered the world, we were...
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told to work. So work has value. It's not like
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TGIF. It's not like the mentality we've been
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inundated with our culture is that the mentality
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that what most of our culture tells us is do
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as little as possible to get as much as possible
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for the greatest income as possible unless you
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own the business. And see, we then We do the
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same thing in those other relationships like
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I shared. We want the results, but the diligence,
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the line upon line, the precept upon precept,
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the getting up, the putting one foot after another,
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it's very difficult to learn to work hard on
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the things that are hard for us to work on. And
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so he says, you gotta understand the value of
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work. Jesus, for the first 30 years, worked with
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his hands. He learned that things don't happen
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overnight. Jesus, though he was fully God and
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fully man, as a little boy, sat with the rabbis
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and he memorized the passages and he asked questions
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and he did the work to learn to grow. He grew
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in stature before God and before men. So there's
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a great value in work. But notice also in this
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passage, the purpose of work. The purpose of
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work just isn't upward economic mobility. He
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says, you who steal, steal no longer. Stop taking
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shortcuts, but work with your hands. What's the
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last phrase? So that you may be able to share.
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Interesting little Greek word, the idea of sharing
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with those in need. It has the idea of doing
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it personally. This isn't sharing as in I get
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some money and I give it to an agency or an organization
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or even to the church. This is working with your
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hands. And as you work with your hands, You meet
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people that have actual needs, and part of the
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reason that you work before God is you want to
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have some extra to help other people personally.
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See, it goes from saying, I'm not gonna steal,
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to I wanna be generous. I wanna be like God.
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I wanna be like Christ. Remember, as a prisoner
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of the Lord, I say to you, no longer live in
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this way, but walk in a manner worthy. That means
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you're gonna look, and think and talk and share
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the way Jesus does. The training apparatus that's
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been most helpful to me is I'm gonna encourage
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you to write out a to -be list. Now, I don't
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know about you, but I've learned to work best
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because of mentors. My first mentor was my father.
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Say no more. I mean, there's some of us that
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grew up with, I learned how to work. He passed
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it on, and by the way, you know, there's some
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things about my dad that weren't real helpful.
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This was very helpful. Son, that's okay, and
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I'll try it again the right way. Anybody remember
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that? When I taught my kids early on, it wasn't
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just about cleaning this or doing the garage
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or doing their room or making their bed. It was
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they needed to learn that the diligence, not
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taking shortcuts, is a discipline and it's difficult.
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But as you go into training, you can learn how
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to do it. So probably one of the best gifts Teresa
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and I gave our kids was teaching them to work.
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And early on, I mean, it was terrible. They would
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vacuum, and then you'd say, you know what? You
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have to move these things and vacuum them, not
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just go around them. Or, you know, they needed
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to clean their room, and you'd open the closet,
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and you realize it looked clean when you walked
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in, but it looks like a mess there. And so you
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teach them. You know, you look at a homework
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paper, and you go, oh, my lands. I mean, you'd
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have to have x -ray vision to figure out what
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this says. You know, rewrite it. Do it right.
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It takes time. And when I say a to -be list,
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here's one of my biggest mentors, other than
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my father and a few other people. I shared with
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you, Professor Howard Hendricks was a great mentor
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in my life. In my third year of school, there
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was about 10 or 12 of us. We met with him for
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lunch. And we'd have a brown bag lunch, and we
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would talk. And I was working full -time, going
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to school full -time, had three kids, and had
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just started out pastoring a church. And so,
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I mean, my life was crazy. I mean, it was up
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four in the morning, and you study here, then
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you do this with the church, and then you drive
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in, and then you go to school, and then you try
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and be a good dad. I mean, it was nuts. And I'll
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never forget him talking about men, the problem
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with a lot of your lives, because we'd ask him
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questions for an hour every Wednesday afternoon
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over lunch. He says, you need to... create a
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to -be list instead of just a to -do list. I
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mean, my to -do lists were this long and I could
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never get them all done. And I'll never forget,
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you might be thinking, what do you mean by a
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to -be list? He said, you will never be more
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loved than you're loved right now. You'll never
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get all your to -dos done. And your life isn't
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based on your performance. So what you need to
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do is get very, very clear about who do you want
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to be? Who do you want to become? And I don't
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know how this works, but I'm praying. I prayed
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for you all today that this will happen in your
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life. I don't know how it is when certain truths,
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it's not like I never heard it before, but you
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know how they ignite inside your mind and then
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somehow they get down into your heart and you
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feel compelled, I have to act on this. And I
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remember driving away from that little seminary
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and stopping at a Dairy Queen in a little town
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called Crandall, and then on the back of a napkin
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said, I'm either gonna make a to -be list and
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follow it, or I'm gonna keep living this crazy
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life where I'm not quite the husband I need to
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be, and I'm not getting enough sleep, and I'm
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not working out anymore, and I've got school
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over here, and life is crazy. And in the back
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of a little napkin, I said, I want to be a man
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of God. I want to be a great husband. I want
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to be a great dad. I want to be a great friend.
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I want to be a great pastor. And I want to be
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someone who takes care of my body. And then what
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Prof. Hendricks said was, you take those and
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you stick them in your schedule before you do
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anything else. Sure, you'll still have a lot
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of to -dos to do. But when you stick those in,
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if you will be diligent. The person you are a
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year, three years, five years, 10 years, that
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was 30 years ago, literally to the year. And
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I decide if I'm gonna be a man of God, I'm gonna
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meet with God at least an hour every morning
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before anybody else. If I'm gonna be a great
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husband, my wife's gonna know that every Friday
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for three hours, we're gonna have a date uninterrupted
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that she has me with my undivided attention.
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And every night, every night after our meal,
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it might be 10 minutes, it might be 30 minutes,
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but we're gonna talk and connect from the heart.
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I went through and I put my kids' names in my
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schedule on the same calendar. And to be, then
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I said, we're going to eat together and I'm going
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to meet with my kids individually. And then there's
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two or three guys that I really liked. I said,
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I want to be a great friend and I want to work
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out and I love being with you guys and I need
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to process some stuff with you that I don't need
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to talk about with my wife. And I built that
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in my schedule. And then I changed my calendar.
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I said, you know what? There's two or three things
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as the senior pastor that only I can do. And
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all of Wednesday was gonna be sermon preparation.
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And I was gonna have my deadline. And I mean,
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it was so hard. And it was three steps forward
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and two steps backwards. But I was more concerned
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about my to -be list than my to -do list. Be
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diligent. Work hard. Don't take shortcuts. Because
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see, here's what happens. I can't tell you that
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everything overnight at all got way better. It's
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a lot like this exercise right here. You know,
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when you go, everyone likes to pump a lot of
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iron, you know, right? You know, you do the curls
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and you know, hey, you know, get the, well, I'm
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not gonna do that because it'd be embarrassing,
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but you get the big guns or get the big pecs,
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right? But how many people go, hey, how's those
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back muscles coming? Man, she's got an awesome
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back. He's got a great back. Have you ever heard
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that? See, this is diligence. These are the kind
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of exercises, personally, I hate. Right? You
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do these, and it's like, come on. I mean, no
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one sees these things. Of course, these are the
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balancing muscles to these. And then you can't
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just do one side. You've got to do both sides.
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And what happens is, for those who do the actual
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kind of personal training, what they tell us
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is that every muscle you have to work the other
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side. And as people get older, have you noticed
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how many people, when they get older, they walk
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like this? Because they don't have these strong
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muscles. Diligence. You go into training. You
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get diligent about I'm going to make my marriage
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a priority. I'm going to make my personal time
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with God a priority. But it's not about the activity.
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It's who do you want to become. You are currently
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becoming someone. And who are you becoming? You're
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becoming. Where your time and energy and focus,
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you are in training right now. You just don't
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know what it is. But you may be training to become
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a workaholic. You may be in training for your
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marriage to drift. You may be in training for
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your kids to be disengaged 20 years from now.
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See, the problem is, is I can do this three times
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a week and you can't even hardly even see the
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back muscles. You don't see the results. Most
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of everything I said about the to be, I saw no
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difference for a year or two or three or five.
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But here's what I'll tell you. I can remember
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10 years into my marriage thinking, wow, instead
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of being in marriage counseling, I didn't believe
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it's good. I remember 20 years into my relationship
21:53
with my kids and thinking, boy, I said no to
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this and no to that, and it was a hassle, but
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we ate together. I tucked them in, and now I've
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got grown kids by the grace of God and their
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individual choices. who love God and you have
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a relationship. There's no guarantees, but there
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is a guarantee if you aren't diligent. See, sowing
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and reaping, right? We all believe that. You
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always reap what you sow, but here's the catch.
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You never reap in the same season. You never
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reap in the same season that you sow. So let
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me encourage you. Be diligent. Go into training.
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Station number four is be positive. Don't wound
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with your words. Don't wound with your words.
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Be positive. Let no unwholesome word proceed
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from your mouth, but only such a word as is good
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for evocation according to the need of the moment.
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Notice the purpose clause. So that it will give
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grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy
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Spirit of God by whom you were sealed for the
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day of redemption. Here we have the training
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objective is positive speech. Positive speech.
23:04
The training command, say only that which helps.
23:09
Stop saying unwholesome words. The word here
23:12
has the idea of rotten, putrid, corrupt. It's
23:17
like milk that is spoiled or fruit that's gone
23:19
bad or meat that has been corrupted. Don't let
23:24
anything come out of your mouth that's corrupt
23:26
or putrid. Instead, say words that build up,
23:30
that help, that edify, that encourage. And the
23:33
idea of this phrase is that encourage specifically
23:36
at specific times according to the needs as you're
23:39
engaging with people. The training action is
23:43
put off negative speech. Renew, recognize the
23:47
power and the consequences of your speech. So
23:51
first we're gonna put off negative speech. And
23:54
some of you who may be thinking, you know, I'm
23:55
glad this one doesn't apply much to me. Well,
23:58
I listed in my notes about 12 or 13 little negative
24:02
speeches that at some point in my life I've either
24:04
heard or practiced, unfortunately. And I'll share
24:07
those in just a minute. But I want you to get,
24:10
we're gonna put off negative speech and then
24:13
we're gonna start thinking. Instead of not thinking
24:16
much about my words, I'm gonna renew my mind
24:18
and I'm gonna realize the power and the consequences
24:22
of what comes out of my mouth. And then what
24:25
I'm gonna put on is I'm gonna put on positive,
24:29
encouraging, Here's some examples of negative
24:33
speech. Sarcasm, put downs, innuendos, general
24:37
negativity, outbursts of anger, criticism, labeling,
24:41
abusive speech, cussing, swearing, taking the
24:44
Lord's name in vain, slander, gossip, coarse
24:48
jokes. Should I go on? Now, here's the deal.
24:53
You need to understand the power in your words.
24:57
Proverbs 18, 21. Very powerful. Tells us there's
25:03
life and death in the power of our words. And
25:09
those who love it will eat its fruit. I mean,
25:12
if I could pass a microphone around and some
25:15
of you could tell me a moment with one of your
25:17
parents or with a teacher or with a coach who
25:20
said something to you and it brought death to
25:23
you. You're a loser. I wish we never had you.
25:27
You'll never amount to anything. Get out! out
25:30
of this house. You're too short. You're too fat.
25:33
You'll never make it. I don't love you. Remember?
25:38
Remember that? Words are not, you know, that
25:41
sticks and stones will break my bones, but words
25:43
will never hurt me. Liar, liar, liar, pants on
25:46
fire. You can absorb a lot more sticks and stones
25:48
than you can ever. The power, there's life and
25:51
death in the power of words. What comes out of
25:54
your mouth brings life to the people around you
25:57
or kills them. We could get another microphone
26:01
and we could talk about the teacher or the coach
26:03
or the friend or the person who said, no, you
26:08
ought to go out for the team. I think you'd be
26:09
good. You know, it's amazing how you think. Have
26:12
you ever thought of being an engineer? Oh, no,
26:14
no, you should apply to a college. You can make
26:16
it. And now you got your PhD. Or you know something?
26:21
You pick up those songs pretty quickly. Why don't
26:23
you try playing this instrument? You're great
26:26
with people. Have you ever thought about being
26:28
a counselor? Hey, we need you. Come on. And you
26:31
know what? Someone believed in you before you
26:33
believed in yourself and they gave you words
26:35
of life and words of hope. Be positive. Don't
26:41
wound with your words. Why? Because there's power.
26:44
The second reason, there's consequences. Very
26:48
interesting. I don't know if you've ever done
26:50
this, but now and then I've memorized a verse
26:52
that I wish I hadn't. Only because it's like,
26:56
oh my lands, I have to live with this. Luke 6
26:59
.45 is a very interesting passage where Jesus
27:02
says that our words are like a spiritual MRI
27:06
and they will tell you what's really going on
27:10
in your heart. A good man, according to Jesus,
27:14
brings good things out of the good stored up
27:16
in his heart. And an evil man brings out evil
27:19
things of the evil stored up in his heart. For
27:22
the mouth speaks by that which fills the heart.
27:27
See, the reason you need to be so careful and
27:29
actually monitor your words and listen to your
27:31
words is because a lot of us say things to people.
27:35
We're critical of someone. We put put downs here,
27:38
innuendo here, a little joke here, a little sexual
27:41
connotation here. And we think, ah, what are
27:44
words? And then we say something in an argument
27:47
and then we say, oh, I was only kidding or I
27:49
didn't really mean it. No, no, no, no, you don't
27:51
get it. What you really mean is what comes out
27:54
of your mouth. In fact, a lot of the, oh, I'm
27:57
only kidding, I'm only joking, that's just because
27:59
you don't have the courage to say it directly
28:01
and kindly and lovingly. What you really mean
28:04
is exactly what came out of your mouth. Outbursts
28:07
of anger tell you about hatred in your heart.
28:09
Put downs and insecurities come out of your mouth
28:11
because you put someone down because this is
28:14
what's going on inside. See, our words. You have
28:19
to go into training. James said that if you can
28:22
ever control your tongue, it's like putting the
28:24
bit in a horse or like the rudder on a ship.
28:27
You can control your whole life. We'll talk about
28:31
some very practical ways in just a minute, but
28:33
I just want you to get, go into training to be
28:37
positive. Go into training where you think about
28:40
what comes out of my mouth. And if you... want
28:43
to grow spiritually and understand. So what's
28:46
God doing in me? Listen to your words. Listen
28:49
to your tone of voice. Is there an angry heart?
28:53
Is there a critical heart? Is there a wounded
28:55
heart? Is there a perverted heart? Is there a
28:57
corrupt heart? Because it'll tell you. And if
29:01
that isn't enough, this is the one that, maybe
29:04
another passage that, I don't know what I was
29:06
doing. I had this season where I was memorizing
29:08
one of these verses. I guess I really needed
29:09
them. And these are what I call Jesus verses.
29:15
These are ones like, Lord, I had no idea that
29:19
my mouth was so critical to every single relationship.
29:23
Matthew chapter 12, verses 36 and 37, Jesus says,
29:27
but I tell you that every careless word that
29:29
people speak, they shall render account for it
29:31
in the day of judgment. For by your words, you'll
29:33
be justified and by your words, you'll be condemned.
29:38
Every careless word, every little comment, every
29:42
little gossip, every little slander, every little
29:44
conversation, driving out of the parking lot
29:46
talking about someone, everything when you get
29:48
off the phone and you put it down and you talk
29:50
about someone that you would never say if they
29:52
were here in those presence. And Jesus says that
29:55
every careless word that you speak or I speak,
29:58
I will give an account and you will give an account
30:01
at the day of judgment. Can you grasp? Can you
30:06
fathom the impact that would have on your heart,
30:10
your relationships with God if you went into
30:13
training? Because really, your words are a reflection
30:16
of your heart. See, this training station, I
30:19
think, is a lot like our cardio. You know, cardio
30:21
is something that, you know, I've met guys at
30:25
that big gym I told you about, and I've seen
30:29
guys that, I mean, they are just massive. Now,
30:32
they don't do any cardio. And I have a sneaking
30:34
suspicion by how big and how fast they got that
30:37
they were taking a little something there, you
30:40
know, injecting a little something. And I've
30:43
seen guys that look like they are the most unbelievable
30:46
bodybuilders in the world and they go up three
30:48
flights of steps and they can't catch their breath.
30:51
You can see their skeletal muscles are strong,
30:54
but their heart is weak because there's no cardio.
30:58
When you go into training for your speech, you
31:00
know what you're doing? You're building probably,
31:03
The most important muscle in your body. The most
31:07
important muscle in your body is your heart.
31:10
And there's few things that you can go into training
31:12
for that will let you know how your heart is
31:16
doing. Like saying to yourself, you know, Lord,
31:19
I'm gonna use my speech as a mirror. In fact,
31:23
your word is a mirror to me and I'm gonna use
31:26
my speech as a mirror so that rather than just
31:29
some sort of external nice morality, Christian,
31:33
I wanna be someone who's pure in heart. Because
31:36
according to Jesus, the pure in heart see God
31:39
and experience God. And I'm gonna go into training
31:43
to be positive. I'm gonna be positive in my words
31:46
in my home and with my roommate and with my friends.
31:50
I'm gonna be positive when people are around.
31:52
I'm gonna be positive for my tone of voice. Now,
31:54
when you go into training on this one, it will
31:56
be very painful at first because most of us don't
31:59
think much about our words. Well, how do you
32:02
do that? Let me give you a little training apparatus.
32:06
Practice silence and solitude. Under silence,
32:10
would you just jot the verse Proverbs 10, 19.
32:14
It says, when there are many words, transgression
32:16
is unavoidable. This is a funny application.
32:21
Talk less. Now for some of you, that's not a
32:26
problem. For others, I won't mention any names.
32:30
It's a big problem. Especially if you're a verbal
32:33
processor. Sometimes you think out loud, and
32:36
as my wife lovingly says to me, Chip, it's okay
32:39
if you think out loud, but could you do it with
32:40
your tongue not moving? Because sometimes as
32:44
you're processing out loud, it's very unhelpful
32:47
for other people. Sometimes in a meeting, what
32:49
would happen is you would actually look smarter
32:51
and more, I mean, profound if you just didn't
32:54
say as much. In fact, you might even try, if
32:57
you have a problem with speaking and you want
32:59
to get control, you might do the five or 10 second
33:02
rule. Something comes to your mind, one 1 ,000,
33:05
two 1 ,000, three 1 ,000, four 1 ,000, five 1
33:08
,000 before you speak. For some of us, you need
33:10
to go to 10. But silence. The second is solitude.
33:17
And what I mean by solitude is I don't have a
33:18
picture of you. Although it probably wouldn't
33:21
hurt most of us to get two or three days away
33:23
in some retreat center and not speak to anyone
33:25
for two or three days. Many of us, that would
33:28
maybe be too much too soon. We'd probably go
33:29
insane. White jacket, you know. But I will tell
33:34
you what. If you would say, God, I'm going to
33:37
spend solitude with you a half hour or 45 minutes
33:40
or an hour every day. And since this is the mirror
33:43
of your word and it is truth. What I'm gonna
33:46
do, God, is I want you to know that I want my
33:48
heart to be pure and I will deceive myself and
33:51
so I'm gonna systematically read through your
33:54
word and there's lots of good programs and you
33:56
read and then you close your Bible and you say,
33:58
Lord, would you help me respond? What do you
33:59
wanna say to me? And then you sit quietly and
34:02
for some of you, just sit quietly. You don't
34:04
need to do this. For some of us that are very,
34:06
very verbal, then I get out my journal, I begin
34:09
to write. Lord, would you speak to me? Would
34:11
you bring to my mind anybody or anything in the
34:14
last day or so where things have come out of
34:16
my mouth and sit quietly and I will tell you,
34:19
if you struggle with like God never answers my
34:21
prayers, you're gonna get some answers, prayers
34:22
in a hurry. He'll bring vivid pictures to your
34:25
mind of what you said or how you said it. And
34:29
this will be difficult at first, but you'll start
34:31
experiencing God. When you go into training on
34:35
your speech and you begin to open his word, you'll
34:38
start to experience God because he longs for
34:41
your words to give life. He longs for you to
34:44
be a conduit of life and hope and building up
34:46
and education in your home and at work and in
34:49
your family and your neighborhood. But most of
34:52
us don't think much about what we say. So let
34:55
me encourage you. Go into training. Be positive.
35:01
Don't wound with your words. Station number five.
35:06
We go into training to be forgiving. Be forgiving.
35:13
Be the first to say, I'm sorry. Verse 31, he
35:19
says, let all bitterness and wrath and anger
35:21
and clamor and slander be put away from you along
35:24
with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted,
35:29
forgiving each other. Well, how? just as God
35:32
and Christ also has forgiven you. Would you put
35:35
a line under those key words, bitterness, wrath,
35:38
anger, clamor, slander, and then skip down to
35:41
all malice. Then put a circle around kind, circle
35:46
around tenderhearted, circle around forgiving.
35:50
In fact, grammatically, what he's gonna say is
35:52
stop being bitter, and grammatically, it's show
35:55
yourself or demonstrate yourself to be a kind,
35:58
tenderhearted, compassionate, forgiving person.
36:02
The training command is to be kind. Training
36:05
objective is relational harmony. I mean, that's
36:08
really what he's talking about is great relationships.
36:10
The training command is to be kind, tenderhearted,
36:14
and forgiving. The negative is stop hateful attitudes
36:18
and behaviors. Start showing and demonstrating
36:23
loving attitudes and behaviors. And so the training
36:28
actions are to put off hate. Put off hate. I
36:34
did a little word study on each of these. And
36:35
since we tend to use words loosely, let me just
36:39
go through and tell you what bitterness and anger.
36:42
And I mean, he's very particular about these.
36:45
Bitterness is the longstanding resentment that
36:47
we have. It's a spirit inside of us that refuses
36:50
to be reconciled with someone. Now, by the way,
36:52
you do understand that this is a command. In
36:56
light of someone's hurt you, betrayed you, abused
36:59
you, wounded you, gossiped about you, slandered
37:02
you, did you in, right? You're hurt. I mean,
37:05
that's why you get bitter and that's why you
37:07
get angry, right? It's nursing anger to keep
37:11
it warm and brooding over insults and injuries.
37:15
You have anger fantasies about these people.
37:19
Wrath here is an outbreak of passion. It's a
37:22
picture of, you know, like a piece of newspaper
37:24
that you light. This is rage. These are those
37:29
outbursts that people have. The clamor or anger
37:33
here is that habitual righteous anger, but the
37:38
sun goes down on it. And so although it's righteous
37:42
and it's just and you're angry pretty soon, everything
37:45
in you is critical about everything and everyone
37:47
because it doesn't measure up. The clamor is
37:50
loud talking, brawling, shouting. This is that,
37:54
you know, screaming at one another, shouting
37:56
at one another, injurious names, calling people
37:58
names. It's the kind of stuff that some of you
38:02
remember was a part of your first marriage. And
38:05
then even in counseling, you said, oh, well,
38:07
we'll bring it back and I'm sorry and I didn't
38:09
mean it. But see, words have the power of life
38:11
and death. People blew up and scars were there.
38:18
Slander, we get our word blasphemy from. It's
38:20
evil speaking. It's trying to injure someone
38:23
with your speech and making up untrue statements
38:25
or shading them or spinning them in a way that
38:28
when other people hear it, it puts another person
38:30
in a bad light. And then finally, malice just
38:33
has the idea of flowing from a heart that desires
38:35
for the other person to pay. It's just this sort
38:39
of joy in the demise of another person. And what
38:44
he says is, You are not a spiritual green caterpillar
38:51
anymore. You have come to know the living Savior.
38:55
You've been in the cocoon of the supernatural
38:57
community of God's church. And put it off. That
39:01
behavior is off limits for the children of God.
39:03
And you are now a supernatural, by his grace,
39:06
butterfly. And he's going to say, I want you
39:08
to put on kindness. It means sweetness, gentleness.
39:13
has the idea of generosity. It has the focus
39:17
of thinking of others. It's an outward focus.
39:19
Then he says, put on kindness and tenderheartedness,
39:22
or literally the word is compassion. It's an
39:24
interesting word used of Jesus, splotna. In the
39:27
ancient world, they didn't use the heart of the
39:29
center of affections. It was the liver and the
39:31
bowels. They thought the deepest thinking came
39:34
from here. And so that's this word for this.
39:37
And it's the idea, it's more than empathy. This
39:40
is someone even who has hurt you, but you think
39:43
about where is it they came from? And there's
39:46
something where you see the hurt and the damage.
39:50
And every time this word comes up with Jesus,
39:52
he sees a great multitude. And he sees they're
39:56
like downcast sheep. And if you know anything
39:58
about a downcast sheep is once they roll over
40:01
too far on their own, they cannot roll back without
40:03
help. They will die. And he says that's how he
40:06
saw people and their dysfunction and their sin
40:08
and their hurt and their patterns. And he had
40:11
compassion on them. Compassion always leads to
40:15
action to help. And so he says put away those
40:19
things but instead be tender hearted. Not hard
40:24
hearted. Not harsh. Compassionate. And then forgiving
40:27
it literally means to put it away. To release
40:30
it. Just the way God took your sin and my sin
40:34
and he put it away and he placed it on Christ
40:37
so that when Jesus was hanging on the cross,
40:40
your sin and my sin and the sins of the whole
40:43
world were placed on him and the just wrath of
40:45
God for your sin and mine was placed on him and
40:48
he paid for it and so he atoned or his blood
40:50
covered our sin and whosoever would believe and
40:54
turn in faith and receive that gift, your sins
41:00
go to his account and his righteousness comes
41:03
to your account. because he's merciful to you.
41:07
And that's what he's saying. But your thinking
41:09
has to change. My thinking has to change. We
41:13
put off hate. The renewing of our mind is we
41:16
remember that right relationships take precedent
41:18
over my rights. See, when I'm hurt, when you're
41:22
hurt, you know, you're thinking, don't be bitter.
41:26
I mean, be kind. don't blow up, be tenderhearted.
41:30
I mean, after what she did, after what he did,
41:33
I mean, he said he was a Christian, he's my business
41:35
partner, he ripped me off. After she talked behind
41:38
my back, are you kidding me? I will never, you
41:40
know what? Thanksgiving, until hell freezes over,
41:43
I'll never be in the same room with that group
41:44
of people. Anybody had any of those? Paying people
41:49
back. He said, that's not how spiritual butterflies
41:52
live. When you give other people what they don't
41:56
deserve, Granted, there may be situations where
41:59
you have to set boundaries, but this starts in
42:02
a real attitude of the heart. You will never
42:04
be more like Jesus. You've heard it said, love
42:08
your friends and hate your enemies, but I say
42:10
to you, love your enemies and pray for those
42:13
who persecute you. For what value is it if you
42:16
do good to them who can do good back to you?
42:19
Be merciful like your heavenly father is merciful
42:22
who causes it to rain on the just and on the
42:25
unjust. And so the training command here is what
42:28
I call the Matthew 524 principle. The Matthew
42:32
524 principle. This is the one that reminds me
42:37
that my rights, this isn't fair, is not as important
42:41
as right relationships. Matthew 524, it's this
42:45
picture of an Old Testament saint in the time
42:48
of Jesus coming to the altar and he's gonna present
42:51
his offering. He may have a pigeon or... He may
42:53
have a calf or a goat and he's making an offering.
42:56
And it says, if you come there before God with
42:58
your offering and there remember your brother
43:01
has something against you. Now notice, it's not
43:03
you have something against him. Now that I could
43:06
buy, right? I got this against him. I got a bad
43:10
attitude. I ripped him off. I'm really mad. I'm
43:12
really angry. Okay, Lord, I get it. I'll go apologize.
43:15
That's not what it says. It says, if when you're
43:18
bringing your offering and you know they have
43:20
something against you, And in your mind going,
43:23
something against me. Are you kidding me? It
43:26
was 92 % their fault. When they come and apologize,
43:30
we'll get this right. What's it say? When you
43:34
know they have something against you, leave your
43:36
offering at the altar. Go and be reconciled with
43:40
your brother. Go own the 8%. Make every effort
43:46
as far as it depends on you to be at peace with
43:49
all men. Do whatever it takes because the relationship
43:53
to God is more important than who is right. The
44:00
relationship in your family, and some of you
44:03
have been there. You're estranged from family
44:05
members. There's been these breakdowns and pains
44:08
and hurts and struggles, and they're real. And
44:12
it takes someone with maturity who says being
44:15
fair is not the issue. And just because you do
44:19
this doesn't mean there's reconciliation. It
44:21
doesn't mean people hug. It doesn't mean Thanksgiving
44:23
is wonderful. But what it means is you have been
44:26
a child of God. You're walking in a manner worthy.
44:29
You're living the way Jesus is his life through
44:31
you. And so you go to them and you make every
44:35
effort and you'd be surprised what God will do.
44:40
You'd be surprised how healing can occur. There's
44:43
been so many relationships among Christians.
44:45
This happens, there's a divide, and they're over
44:47
here, you're over here. When their name comes
44:49
up, your stomach, right, you know, kind of gets
44:52
a little like this. When you see them in a grocery
44:54
store or someplace, or heaven forbid, like at
44:56
the airport when you're traveling, and you just
44:58
realize, oh, my lands. Then you try and act like
45:01
you don't see them, then it's too late, and then
45:03
it's like a scab. You know why? Because it's
45:05
not dealt with. You go into training, and you
45:10
go into training, to make the relationships what
45:13
God wants them to be. Because when I sin and
45:17
blow it, like I do and you do, I come to God
45:21
and I say, oh Lord, I can't believe I said that.
45:23
I can't believe I did that. I know I should have
45:25
done this, but I did that. And boy, the potential
45:27
consequences are this and this and this and this.
45:29
Oh Jesus, will you please forgive me? Would you
45:32
please forgive me? Please be merciful. Please
45:34
don't hold me accountable to this. Would you
45:36
please forgive me? What do I want? Mercy. And
45:42
yet, someone violates me and what do I want?
45:45
Justice. And what Jesus says is, I gave you mercy.
45:55
Now, you need to extend it. See, this is like
46:00
this training station and it's the one that many
46:03
of us don't appreciate at all. The abs. The abs
46:08
hold everything together. But if there's bitterness
46:11
in your heart, for relationships out of sync.
46:14
You know, the principle of the entire book of
46:16
1 John is if your relationship with God vertically
46:19
is right, then your relationships with people
46:22
horizontally have to be right. So, you know,
46:24
you do the ab work, you know, and you do all
46:26
this kind of stuff, and you ride the bicycle,
46:27
and for some of us, you remember junior high
46:29
sports, and you put your feet up like this, and
46:32
the coach would say, okay, keep them up, keep
46:34
them up, keep them up. And you go, no, get them
46:38
up, get them up, get them up, get them up, get
46:39
them up. Come on, come on, come on, come on,
46:40
come on, come on, right? It's really hard. But
46:45
the core connects everything else. What relationship
46:51
do you realize you need to forgive someone? I
46:56
mean, it's hard to have integrity when, you know,
46:59
there's this thing out there, need to be cleansed
47:02
of. Who? It's coming to your mind right now that
47:05
you realize, I need to make a phone call or have
47:08
a breakfast or grab a cup of coffee or at least
47:10
write a letter. And as far as it depends on me,
47:13
leave my offering at the altar. I remember about
47:19
five years ago, I tore a disc in my back, L4,
47:23
L5. And I mean, I couldn't sit down. I couldn't.
47:27
When I rode on planes, it was just, I mean, excruciating.
47:30
I had to take three Advil and a pain pill. And
47:32
I did injections. I did everything. Nothing worked.
47:35
And a guy said, well, I can fuse your back, but
47:38
then you can't do anything. He said, if you can
47:40
endure the pain in a couple years, the body's
47:43
going to start healing. But you got to endure
47:46
it. I tried everything. And then this doctor,
47:49
who was a back doctor, had my same problem. He
47:51
gave me the card of his personal trainer. He
47:53
said, what I did is I went nuts. And he said,
47:56
I got my core so strong that it began to take
47:58
all the pressure off my back. And I didn't go
48:01
to his trainer, but I tried everything. And so,
48:03
ladies, please don't laugh. I learned that Pilates
48:09
really builds your core. And I found myself in
48:12
a room with all women. And my wife was gracious
48:17
to go with me. And all of a sudden, okay, the
48:20
plank, you know, diligent, you know. And here's
48:22
all these ladies smiling. I'm going, you know,
48:25
I haven't done anything in two years. And what
48:28
I had to learn was to be diligent. And I did
48:31
Pilates and a Pilates fusion type deal. And after
48:35
three, four, five months, my back pain was gone.
48:39
Because what happened here and what happened
48:42
here put the rest of it together. And for some
48:46
of you, you need to go into training. Some with
48:50
your heart being positive with your words. Some,
48:53
right, those back exercises. For others, it's
48:58
kind of the cardio work. I want to wrap up our
49:03
time and wrap up our series by really asking
49:05
you to do a little thinking and work. God is
49:11
a provider. Transformation is always by grace.
49:15
Your number one cheerleader is living inside
49:17
you. It's the Holy Spirit. What we've learned
49:20
is that you grieve him and I grieve him when
49:22
words come out of our mouth, when we hurt other
49:24
people. This isn't a formula. These aren't principles.
49:27
These are not self -help. This isn't going to
49:29
training and do all these things. You'll be a
49:31
better person, be more successful. All those
49:33
things may happen, but it's completely not the
49:35
point. This is a relationship. This is about
49:38
the living God living inside of you, and there's
49:41
a part of the transformation that no one's going
49:43
to do for you. You've got everything you need,
49:46
his spirit, his word, his people. And there's
49:48
part of it that's hard to be honest and be angry
49:51
and be diligent and be positive and be forgiving.
49:55
That's your part. You can't do it, but he's working
49:59
and he's creating some of you right now. He's
50:01
creating the will and the desire to do some things
50:03
that you don't want to do. And so here's the
50:07
application. Number one, I want you, look at
50:10
your notes. Underneath there, where are you doing
50:13
well? I mean, some of your personalities, oh,
50:16
I'm doing terrible. I'm terrible on the bike.
50:17
I'm terrible on the back. I don't do, I need
50:19
spiritual abs. I need, I'm a terrible person.
50:21
That is not God's, that's not his word to you.
50:25
You need to rejoice and say, you know something,
50:27
where was I a year ago or three years ago? I've
50:29
made progress. Jot it down. I'm a lot better
50:32
with my words. I used to have an anger problem.
50:35
Wow, I remember I forgave so -and -so a couple
50:37
years ago after what cheer he did. Write that
50:40
down. Be encouraged. Then second, what one area
50:45
do you need to address? Don't look at all five
50:47
of those and go, oh, yes, yes. No, no, no, no.
50:50
Don't try to do all five. What's the critical
50:53
one? What's the keystone habit spiritually that
50:56
when you make progress on this, the others will
50:58
fall into place? And then finally, you can't
51:02
do this by yourself. None of us can do this.
51:07
And so the last question is who? Who's gonna
51:10
help you? I just had another injury and I went
51:13
to a physical therapist on Friday. And I had
51:18
been doing exercises by myself. And I felt very
51:22
proud of myself. And then I went to this physical
51:25
therapist and he had me do exercises. I mean,
51:29
tears. Put this ball between your knees. Do this
51:32
on the back. How you doing? Give me 10 more.
51:36
Okay, here's this machine. Three sets. He took
51:39
me through something. It was amazing, the difference.
51:43
You need someone in your life to help you push
51:47
to the levels by the grace of God to become the
51:51
person God died for. for you to become so that
51:55
you could demonstrate his love and his light
51:58
and his holiness as a natural response to the
52:02
life that comes at you. He's done his part. Now
52:06
work out your salvation with fear and trembling.
52:11
This is Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram and
52:14
a message called The Power of Spiritual Training
52:17
in the Transformation Process. Part of our series,
52:20
Free at Last, How to Break Out of a Destructive
52:22
Lifestyle. Chip has more to share with us in
52:25
a bit. This whole series on breaking free is
52:28
available on the Living on the Edge podcast,
52:30
ready to go at your pace, whatever your schedule
52:33
looks like. Want the full sermon with nothing
52:35
cut out? Well, that's what you can find on the
52:38
Chip Ingram Sermon Podcast. Both podcasts are
52:41
available wherever you listen. Knowing what forgiveness
52:44
looks like and actually extending it are two
52:47
different battles. Chip's book, Yes, You Really
52:50
Can Change, was written for the second battle,
52:52
the day -to -day work of letting go of what's
52:55
been holding you back and stepping into the life
52:57
God has called you to live. And right now, we're
53:00
including a second copy with every order so you
53:03
can read it alongside a friend, a family member,
53:05
or someone in your life who needs it. Just look
53:08
for Chip's book, Yes, You Really Can Change,
53:11
online at livingontheedge .org slash offers.
53:16
You know, somebody out there really needs to
53:17
hear exactly what Chip taught today about forgiveness.
53:21
And the reason they can is because listeners
53:23
like you choose to support us. Would you help
53:26
make sure this teaching keeps reaching people
53:28
with the transformative truth of God's Word?
53:30
You can give a gift of any amount today by donating
53:33
online at livingontheedge .org or by calling
53:37
us at 888 -333 -6003. You can also mail your
53:41
gift to Living on the Edge. P .O. Box 3007, Sewanee,
53:46
Georgia 30024. Well, now here's Chip with some
53:50
final thoughts for today. Going into training
53:53
is the key to lasting change. The Apostle Paul,
53:56
after teaching us who we are in Christ, how to
53:59
renew our mind, he says that personal integrity,
54:02
emotional control, financial stewardship, positive
54:05
speech and private attitudes are the key to change
54:09
from the inside out. Now, here's the deal. You
54:12
could just feel absolutely overwhelmed like most
54:15
of us do when you look at that list. God never
54:17
dumps the truck. When you feel condemned, that's
54:21
the enemy. The Spirit of God convicts. That means
54:24
He'll be very specific and He'll say, you know
54:26
something, for you. I want you to talk about
54:29
going into training on integrity. You tell white
54:32
lies. For others, integrity may be an issue,
54:36
but you blow up with your anger or your passive
54:39
aggressive. Or for some, I went into training
54:42
on not being sarcastic. Out of your mouth, those
54:45
little quips. So don't feel like you need to
54:48
do everything. Stop right now and say, Lord,
54:51
you live within me by your Holy Spirit. What's
54:54
the first step you want me to take in terms of?
54:57
transformation and he'll show you sit quietly
55:00
and don't try and get it all done, but go into
55:03
training. I mean, when I taught this, I literally
55:06
set up a gym in our worship center and I went
55:08
from the, you know, the bench press to the curls.
55:10
And if you've ever worked out, I mean, if you
55:13
go and try and do everything, all you do is get
55:15
sore and you quit. You need to go into training
55:18
on one thing. And here's what it requires. Truth
55:22
in your mind, trust in your heart, teammates
55:25
in your life. Somehow get the truth in your mind.
55:29
Whatever you do, whether you listen, read, memorize,
55:32
and then trust in your heart. You've got to verbalize
55:35
and talk with people and someone to hold you
55:37
accountable. And then you need a team of people
55:39
like we all do to go into training. God wants
55:43
and will change your life. Next time, the training
55:46
continues as we learn to understand the power
55:49
of focus. Be sure to listen next time to Living
55:52
on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Today's program
55:58
is produced and sponsored by Living on the Edge.