Latest / Kustom Conversations / You Performed With Jelly Roll? | Chris Porter Interview | EP 01

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You Performed With Jelly Roll? | Chris Porter Interview | EP 01 · Kustom Conversations

• 0:00
  Casi Joy: You went on tour with Jelly Roll.
• 0:02
  Chris Porter: We almost got arrested on the way to the after party.
• 0:04
  Chris Porter: Ooh, do tell, go into the room.
• 0:06
  Chris Porter: We were.
• 0:06
  Chris Porter: But also, if I offend you, buckle up.
• 0:11
  Casi Joy: Yeah. Every story is different.
• 0:15
  Casi Joy: Every episode is Kustom.
• 0:17
  Casi Joy: Get ready to pull back the curtain on your favorite artists, athletes, and entertainers.
• 0:21
  Casi Joy: I'm your host, Cassie Joy, and this is Kustom Conversations.
• 0:30
  Casi Joy: All right, welcome to Kustom Conversations.
• 0:32
  Casi Joy: Today's guest has been making people laugh for more than two decades.
• 0:37
  Casi Joy: You might have seen him from his multiple comedy specials on Netflix, on Comedy Central, Apple Prime, Apple Prime, Apple TV, Amazon Prime, anywhere.
• 0:47
  Casi Joy: And he's even been on tour with Burt Kreischer.
• 0:51
  Casi Joy: So many awesome things.
• 0:52
  Casi Joy: And we are bringing him back to his Kansas City roots.
• 0:55
  Casi Joy: Welcome to the podcast, Chris Porter.
• 0:58
  Chris Porter: What up, everybody?
• 0:59
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 1:00
  Chris Porter: Hello, Cassie Joy.
• 1:01
  Chris Porter: Hello.
• 1:02
  Chris Porter: Good to see you.
• 1:03
  Casi Joy: You too.
• 1:03
  Casi Joy: It's been like It's been a while.
• 1:06
  Casi Joy: I know.
• 1:06
  Casi Joy: I feel like we met in like, was it like 2017, maybe?
• 1:11
  Chris Porter: I think so.
• 1:12
  Chris Porter: Do you remember the was it at the Valai Lama thing?
• 1:15
  Chris Porter: Was it at the pickleball thing that we met?
• 1:16
  Chris Porter: No.
• 1:17
  Casi Joy: I forgot there was that too.
• 1:19
  Chris Porter: There was that too.
• 1:20
  Casi Joy: Well, before that though, it was um do you remember the plaza lighting?
• 1:23
  Chris Porter: Oh, I do remember that.
• 1:24
  Casi Joy: It's a little blurry for me.
• 1:25
  Chris Porter: Yeah, we all had a very good time.
• 1:28
  Casi Joy: For some reason, there were like bottomless wine at uh the after the Brio thing.
• 1:36
  Casi Joy: Brio, yeah.
• 1:37
  Chris Porter: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:37
  Chris Porter: We have like the artist lounge or whatever.
• 1:41
  Casi Joy: Yeah, I had played the plaza lighting that year, and yeah, we linked up and everything's hazy from there.
• 1:47
  Chris Porter: Everything we had a really good time.
• 1:49
  Casi Joy: Here we are.
• 1:50
  Chris Porter: Yeah, I was with my family and friends, and yeah, it was I I every once in a while that photo will come up of us all like in that on that balcony looking out on the 50,000 people.
• 2:02
  Casi Joy: Yes.
• 2:03
  Chris Porter: That's a good time.
• 2:04
  Casi Joy: It's such a good time.
• 2:05
  Casi Joy: Yeah, been a minute.
• 2:06
  Casi Joy: Um, okay, so you are back in Kansas City now.
• 2:09
  Casi Joy: When did you move back from LA?
• 2:11
  Chris Porter: Back January of 25.
• 2:13
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 2:14
  Chris Porter: Like January 1.
• 2:15
  Casi Joy: Oh, nice.
• 2:16
  Casi Joy: You're like, I'm out of there.
• 2:17
  Casi Joy: Um, what made you move back?
• 2:20
  Chris Porter: Um, LA's a different city than it was that I moved to.
• 2:24
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 2:24
  Chris Porter: Uh a lot of the opportunities moved out, and like they don't do as much television production out there anymore, and the scene had changed a little bit.
• 2:36
  Chris Porter: I got older, and also like the days of me going, you know, traveling on the weekends and then coming home and having the energy to go to the comedy store on a Tuesday at 11:30.
• 2:48
  Chris Porter: That was had long left me.
• 2:50
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 2:51
  Chris Porter: And so I don't know.
• 2:52
  Chris Porter: I I had a very specific moment of sitting in my apartment in Toluca Lake watching the Royals and texting with people in Kansas City about the Royals, and I'm like, what am I doing?
• 3:04
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 3:05
  Chris Porter: Why am I here?
• 3:06
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 3:07
  Chris Porter: And uh well, and the answer to that question was a girlfriend that I had, and then uh that ended of its own volition.
• 3:15
  Chris Porter: So then I took that opportunity to to leave town.
• 3:19
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 3:20
  Chris Porter: And uh was probably the best decision I could have made.
• 3:24
  Casi Joy: Well, and like the industry, I mean, I I don't know much about like the ends of like the comedy industry, but even with the music industry, it's like everything is so much online now, it's not, you know, you don't really have to be in the place all the time.
• 3:37
  Casi Joy: It's more about touring and being on the road, and you can do that from anywhere.
• 3:41
  Chris Porter: From anywhere, and you know, one thing that the the pandemic did was change the paradigm to where it is all about followers for better or worse.
• 3:52
  Chris Porter: TikTok.
• 3:53
  Chris Porter: TikTok, all that stuff.
• 3:54
  Chris Porter: So, in some aspect, you are the uh engineer of your own train, which is great, because when you and I started this journey, you had to get in front of one of four people in our pre you know, you either had to get in front of a record company or I had to get on the tonight show.
• 4:10
  Chris Porter: You had to get there were gatekeepers, and now a lot of those gatekeepers have been removed.
• 4:16
  Chris Porter: Uh, and so yeah, you're right, you can do it from anywhere.
• 4:19
  Chris Porter: And yeah, it's like how much do you want to post of you know, just to get out there and people just go viral on TikTok now as comedians now and and you know that comes and go like you know, especially people my age, there's a lot of uh them, because I don't, but there's a lot of folks that get mad at stuff like that, and it's like if those people are talented, if they blow up, then it will last, but if they're not talented, they'll blow up and they'll just fade away.
• 4:46
  Casi Joy: Yeah, yeah, totally.
• 4:47
  Chris Porter: And so just keep doing you and and keep producing the best material you can, and then let the chips fall where they may.
• 4:55
  Casi Joy: And just trying to like chase the industry that's like ever changing of like, oh, we're doing this now, and oh, it's all about reels and tick tock.
• 5:01
  Chris Porter: I have no idea what they're doing.
• 5:02
  Chris Porter: Yeah, they're just ch they're chasing the same dragon we're chasing.
• 5:06
  Chris Porter: Yep.
• 5:06
  Chris Porter: Uh so yeah, it's just like it gets to a point where you're like, why am I I didn't have a lot of a lot of my friends left during the pandemic.
• 5:15
  Chris Porter: They all moved to Austin or to their homes.
• 5:18
  Casi Joy: Yeah, I knew a lot of comedians went to Texas because of things changing in LA.
• 5:22
  Chris Porter: And I just I didn't have I didn't want to move to another scene.
• 5:28
  Casi Joy: Might as well just go back home where you know you know the roads, you know, like where to go, you know the spots.
• 5:34
  Chris Porter: The career and and I called a lot of you know high up bookers in my scene and then was like, what happens if I move home?
• 5:41
  Chris Porter: And every one of them said, Five years ago I would have told you you were making the biggest mistake of your life.
• 5:46
  Chris Porter: Totally.
• 5:47
  Chris Porter: But now they're like, Go go live wherever, be happy.
• 5:50
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 5:51
  Chris Porter: And it's really changed like I'm much hungrier now.
• 5:56
  Chris Porter: Cause I I'm like, oh, I I it's there if you want it.
• 6:01
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 6:01
  Casi Joy: It's almost like removing yourself from like the oversaturation of that industry, like makes you like miss it and want to go out and keep getting it and going on the road and touring more.
• 6:10
  Chris Porter: And there's a bit of you know, you still see your friends on Instagram and stuff, so there is that tinge of FOMO a little bit, but I was just out there for three days, and which was just long enough for me to go, oh, I missed this for a while, and then I was like, I don't want to be here anymore.
• 6:25
  Casi Joy: Yep, and I'm out.
• 6:26
  Casi Joy: Three days was good.
• 6:27
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 6:28
  Chris Porter: And it just came to a point where, and I tell people this all the time, it was like I got to a point in my life where I'd rather live in the peace and visit the chaos than live in the chaos and visit the peace.
• 6:39
  Casi Joy: That is really well put.
• 6:41
  Casi Joy: I really feel that because we just moved back from we were in Nashville for like 10 years, and when I got a positive pregnancy test, I was like, and we have to go home where the whole family is happy because we're gonna need some help.
• 6:52
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 6:52
  Casi Joy: Um, and also like it just Nashville has changed so much too.
• 6:57
  Casi Joy: It's not the same music city as it used to be.
• 6:59
  Casi Joy: And we got to the point where it was like all the places that we tour are all Midwestern, like Minnesota, Texas, Oklahoma, um, like Iowa, all these places that are five hours, four hours from Kansas City, and like 16 hours from Nashville.
• 7:16
  Casi Joy: So it's like almost harder to tour from Nash.
• 7:19
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 7:20
  Chris Porter: So and they wanted me to move the powers that be really wanted me to move to Nashville.
• 7:24
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 7:25
  Chris Porter: When I left LA.
• 7:26
  Chris Porter: And I and I told them straight up, I was like, if I move anywhere else, it would break my mom's heart, and I'm not in that business.
• 7:32
  Casi Joy: Oh, yeah, that's true.
• 7:33
  Casi Joy: Yeah, your parents are both still here, and and plus, and I told him I'm like, You want me to be in Nashville tomorrow, you just gotta call me tonight.
• 7:41
  Casi Joy: And I think it's like an hour and a half flight.
• 7:43
  Chris Porter: Yeah, like it's not hard.
• 7:45
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 7:45
  Chris Porter: So yeah, and I it's just been the best to to be around family, to be around friends.
• 7:53
  Chris Porter: Uh not that I didn't have friends and family in LA, but it's much it's different.
• 7:58
  Chris Porter: It's much well, here's here's what I tell people.
• 8:00
  Chris Porter: When I left LA, I couldn't find more than two people to help me move.
• 8:04
  Chris Porter: And I couldn't even get them at the same time.
• 8:06
  Chris Porter: And when I moved when the truck showed up to Kansas City, there were eight grown men waiting.
• 8:12
  Casi Joy: That's the Midwest.
• 8:14
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 8:14
  Chris Porter: It was we it took me two weeks to load that, or it took me two full days to load that trailer.
• 8:20
  Chris Porter: And it we unloaded it in 45 minutes.
• 8:23
  Casi Joy: Oh, I love that.
• 8:24
  Casi Joy: Yeah, that's so Kansas City.
• 8:25
  Casi Joy: I love it.
• 8:26
  Chris Porter: So yeah, it's just it's a whole different world.
• 8:29
  Casi Joy: Yeah, yeah.
• 8:30
  Casi Joy: And prices and free parking is is just a game changer back here.
• 8:35
  Chris Porter: I got caught in rush hour, it added nine minutes to the trip.
• 8:39
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 8:39
  Chris Porter: And I was like, this is the best.
• 8:41
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 8:41
  Casi Joy: One time when I was in LA like eight years ago, I tried to go to the Hollywood sign, which I almost died in LA three d two different times in three days, which I guess I feel like is common out there.
• 8:53
  Casi Joy: It's a good ratio.
• 8:54
  Casi Joy: Totally.
• 8:55
  Casi Joy: Um, but it took me like it was like a mile drive, and it took like two hours in my little Uber, and I was like, okay, well, I won't be living here at all.
• 9:04
  Casi Joy: And yeah, not to mention the near deaths.
• 9:07
  Casi Joy: So I was out there pretty quick.
• 9:09
  Chris Porter: I was well, I was with my sister last time, and I was like, oh, this thing was so messed up.
• 9:13
  Chris Porter: I had to drive around the block again.
• 9:14
  Chris Porter: And she was like, Oh no, you had to drive around the block.
• 9:17
  Chris Porter: I'm like, yeah, that's weird.
• 9:18
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 9:19
  Chris Porter: Anywhere else, you don't have to do that.
• 9:21
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 9:21
  Chris Porter: Just so you know, that's that's odd.
• 9:23
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 9:24
  Chris Porter: And I and I felt, you know, but in the 20 years I was out there, if you would have been, I would have said the same thing.
• 9:30
  Chris Porter: It's not until you get out of it to where you're like, oh, I did you don't have to do that.
• 9:36
  Casi Joy: Breathe.
• 9:36
  Casi Joy: And there's stars again.
• 9:38
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 9:39
  Casi Joy: Like the ones in the sky, not on the streets.
• 9:41
  Chris Porter: Yeah, no, in LA, even on the clearest night, you'll see three.
• 9:45
  Casi Joy: Sad.
• 9:46
  Chris Porter: Sad.
• 9:46
  Casi Joy: So, okay, talking about coming back to Kansas City, did you miss the barbecue?
• 9:52
  Chris Porter: Uh, yeah.
• 9:53
  Chris Porter: Somewhat.
• 9:54
  Chris Porter: You know, my dad barbecued competitively when I was a kid.
• 9:58
  Casi Joy: So I What's his specialty?
• 10:01
  Chris Porter: Uh pork, pulled pork.
• 10:03
  Chris Porter: Oh.
• 10:04
  Chris Porter: And uh so, you know, barbecue is kind of I it's very uh sparingly eaten in my family.
• 10:13
  Casi Joy: And do you get it like because in the music industry that is like the main thing that's catered if you're out on the road.
• 10:18
  Casi Joy: So like we'll be in Iowa and they're like, I know you're from Kansas City, but like you've gotta try our barbecue.
• 10:24
  Casi Joy: We're known from it here in Iowa.
• 10:26
  Casi Joy: And we're like, I'm okay.
• 10:29
  Casi Joy: Thank you so much.
• 10:30
  Chris Porter: There's a reason no one talks about Des Moines barbecue.
• 10:32
  Casi Joy: Exactly.
• 10:33
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 10:33
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 10:33
  Chris Porter: And you feel bad, and they kind of look at you like, oh, you're being uppity, and you're like, man, I have this all the time.
• 10:40
  Chris Porter: Uh-huh.
• 10:41
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 10:41
  Chris Porter: Sorry.
• 10:42
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 10:42
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 10:43
  Casi Joy: So, well, okay, pretend you do love Kansas City barbecue.
• 10:47
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 10:47
  Casi Joy: What would you say is like your Mount Rushmore for the people?
• 10:52
  Chris Porter: Uh Joe's next door has really uh impressed me.
• 10:57
  Chris Porter: Okay.
• 10:57
  Chris Porter: Uh for the longest time, Joe's like Joe's was my favorite, and then I felt like they fell off when they got super popular, as most places were.
• 11:05
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 11:07
  Casi Joy: How dare you?
• 11:08
  Chris Porter: And then uh because I live four minutes from the regular from the original Joe's.
• 11:13
  Casi Joy: Oh, okay.
• 11:13
  Chris Porter: And so when I moved home, I was like, we're going to Joe's.
• 11:17
  Chris Porter: And I was like, well, this isn't as good as it used to be.
• 11:20
  Chris Porter: And then I tried it again, and it it stayed that I was like, okay.
• 11:24
  Chris Porter: But then when they opened the place next door, I don't know if they started taking their time again or what have you, but man, is it good?
• 11:31
  Chris Porter: So Joe's, uh, you know, LCs, if you uh carry a weapon.
• 11:37
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 11:38
  Chris Porter: And uh good tip.
• 11:39
  Chris Porter: Yeah, gates.
• 11:40
  Chris Porter: I mean, they're all they're all great.
• 11:42
  Chris Porter: I like Woodyard in uh over on Mission Road or whatever that is.
• 11:47
  Chris Porter: Oh in that weird, like KCK Shawnee, you know, that uh that frontage road off I-35.
• 11:55
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 11:56
  Chris Porter: Driving into Mission Road.
• 11:57
  Casi Joy: Again, like I said before we started, I need landmarks.
• 11:59
  Casi Joy: I don't know anything.
• 12:01
  Casi Joy: I'm from Smithville, so I don't know a lot about the Kansas side of things.
• 12:05
  Chris Porter: Well, it's right by that batting cage I used to go as a kid, if that helps.
• 12:09
  Casi Joy: Why didn't you say so?
• 12:10
  Casi Joy: I have a picture.
• 12:11
  Chris Porter: Yeah, I think they still have my statue out front.
• 12:13
  Casi Joy: Perfect.
• 12:13
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 12:14
  Casi Joy: Perfect.
• 12:15
  Casi Joy: Um, okay, was that four?
• 12:17
  Casi Joy: Uh no Arthur Bryant's?
• 12:20
  Chris Porter: Arthur Bryant, actually Arthur Bryant's.
• 12:21
  Chris Porter: Put Arthur Bryant's.
• 12:22
  Chris Porter: So yeah, so I would go Joe's, Gates, Arthur Bryant's uh woodyard.
• 12:27
  Chris Porter: Okay, okay.
• 12:28
  Casi Joy: I like it.
• 12:29
  Casi Joy: Yeah, I've gotten really into um Arthur Bryant's sauce lately.
• 12:33
  Casi Joy: It it's got like a sweat flavor that I'm not proud to say, but like it tastes so good.
• 12:38
  Casi Joy: It's just such a weird flavor.
• 12:40
  Chris Porter: Was that a problem you're having with barbecue?
• 12:42
  Chris Porter: Is it wasn't sweaty enough?
• 12:43
  Casi Joy: Yeah, maybe.
• 12:44
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 12:45
  Casi Joy: Did you see, speaking of barbecue, have you been keeping up with Dead Lasso?
• 12:49
  Chris Porter: Uh no, I have not.
• 12:50
  Chris Porter: I know.
• 12:52
  Chris Porter: I'm way behind the times, and as a Kansas City, and I know it's blasphemy.
• 12:56
  Casi Joy: The first episode is just you're like starstruck over your own town, which is so Kansas City because like we're the only city that treats its own city like tourists.
• 13:06
  Casi Joy: Like we're always like Kansas City shirt.
• 13:08
  Casi Joy: Like, like you'd never see a New York person with like an iHeartNY shirt on.
• 13:12
  Casi Joy: No.
• 13:13
  Casi Joy: But we're like Kansas City everywhere.
• 13:15
  Chris Porter: Well, I think that's a fairly new, like in the last 15 years, the the pride, you know, when Charlie Hussle really came out on the scene and it was like the shirts are soft.
• 13:26
  Casi Joy: Yeah, and they're like, oh, this is a cool shirt.
• 13:29
  Casi Joy: Yeah, and I from a cool place.
• 13:31
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 13:31
  Chris Porter: So yeah, and uh, and now there's all kinds of companies that do it.
• 13:35
  Chris Porter: I love I love uh what is that mob uh deep mob?
• 13:40
  Chris Porter: Yeah, mob deep, something like that.
• 13:42
  Chris Porter: Made mob.
• 13:43
  Chris Porter: That's it.
• 13:43
  Chris Porter: Yep, made mob.
• 13:45
  Chris Porter: They're really great, yeah.
• 13:46
  Chris Porter: Uh they're like the Kansas City Maid Worn, if you know, if you know what that is.
• 13:50
  Chris Porter: Uh Maid Worn is this uh this company out in LA that remakes old shirts.
• 13:58
  Chris Porter: Oh, that's nice.
• 13:59
  Chris Porter: And charges you a ridiculous amount of money for it.
• 14:01
  Casi Joy: Of course, but it's reused, so it's cool.
• 14:03
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 14:04
  Chris Porter: But also, I feel like when you buy a real vintage shirt, you spend just as much money on it, and then two washes later, you're like, oh, that's in pieces then.
• 14:13
  Casi Joy: Mm-hmm.
• 14:13
  Casi Joy: So uh then you send it back and they remake it and charge triple.
• 14:17
  Casi Joy: Okay, so besides um your comedy, which we're gonna get more into later, but you are such a big music fan and music player.
• 14:29
  Casi Joy: I knew you played guitar, but I just recently found out you sing too.
• 14:33
  Casi Joy: I was I scrolled um embarrassingly long on your Instagram.
• 14:39
  Chris Porter: Well, I was coming on your podcast.
• 14:40
  Chris Porter: You can just call it research.
• 14:41
  Casi Joy: Right.
• 14:42
  Casi Joy: That's what I was doing, was researching.
• 14:44
  Casi Joy: Um, but I was like, oh my gosh, is that him singing?
• 14:46
  Casi Joy: So I'm like listening to all these videos.
• 14:47
  Casi Joy: I was like, dang, Chris, go off.
• 14:51
  Chris Porter: Yeah, everyone's gotta have a hobby.
• 14:52
  Casi Joy: Yeah, I love that.
• 14:53
  Chris Porter: And that was one of the first things I did when I moved.
• 14:55
  Chris Porter: Actually, the day I signed my lease, I came to my uncle and I was like, You want to start a band?
• 14:59
  Chris Porter: And he said yes.
• 15:00
  Casi Joy: Yeah, I saw is that who's in your band, like with a bunch of friends that you're playing?
• 15:04
  Chris Porter: Yes, it's uh we're called the Westerlies, and we're a cover band.
• 15:08
  Chris Porter: We play classic rock covers, and it's literally me and almost all of the elders.
• 15:15
  Casi Joy: Oh, that's so cool.
• 15:17
  Chris Porter: Everyone in my band is in the elders.
• 15:18
  Casi Joy: Now we're back to the plaza lighting.
• 15:20
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 15:20
  Chris Porter: And so uh and then they have their own band, so sometimes my band opens for our band.
• 15:28
  Casi Joy: Oh my gosh.
• 15:29
  Casi Joy: Like where are you playing?
• 15:30
  Chris Porter: Uh, Mike Kelly's Westsider.
• 15:32
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 15:32
  Chris Porter: And then uh I think next we're gonna try to get into Knuckleheads.
• 15:36
  Casi Joy: Nice.
• 15:36
  Casi Joy: Oh, let me know when you do that.
• 15:38
  Casi Joy: Will so we love knuckleheads.
• 15:40
  Casi Joy: Um, okay, so with music, you have uh some ins with the country music industry.
• 15:47
  Chris Porter: Yeah, more the rock and roll industry.
• 15:49
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 15:50
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 15:50
  Casi Joy: But you went on tour with Jelly Roll.
• 15:52
  Chris Porter: I did Four Nights with Jelly.
• 15:54
  Casi Joy: Four nights with July.
• 15:54
  Chris Porter: Yeah, that was a weird Like what?
• 15:57
  Chris Porter: So I was still living in LA, and one of my best friends in the world, if not my best friend in the world, is Zach Myers, who's the guitar player for Shinetown.
• 16:06
  Chris Porter: And he called me, he was like, Me, you, Bert, and Jelly are having dinner tonight.
• 16:10
  Chris Porter: And I'm like, buddy, I'm I'm gonna be real honest with you, I'm a little sick, and I probably shouldn't be around anybody.
• 16:16
  Chris Porter: And then he called me a name I can't repeat, and I was like, okay, I'll be at dinner.
• 16:20
  Chris Porter: And so I showed up, and halfway through the dinner, Jelly and I were sitting across from each other.
• 16:27
  Chris Porter: He goes, Hey man, I'm gonna I'm gonna go on tour with Bert.
• 16:30
  Chris Porter: We're gonna sing some songs in between some comics.
• 16:32
  Chris Porter: I was like, that sounds like it'll be a great time.
• 16:34
  Chris Porter: He's like, it will, because you're playing guitar with me.
• 16:36
  Chris Porter: And I was like, excuse me?
• 16:38
  Chris Porter: And he was like, Yeah, you're coming.
• 16:40
  Chris Porter: And I was and I looked at Bert, like, is this real?
• 16:43
  Chris Porter: Because I have to like cancel tour dates.
• 16:45
  Chris Porter: And he didn't even look up from his plate, he goes, It's real.
• 16:49
  Chris Porter: And kept it.
• 16:50
  Chris Porter: I was like, okay.
• 16:51
  Casi Joy: So uh how did he even know you played?
• 16:55
  Casi Joy: Was Zach like pimping you out or something?
• 16:57
  Chris Porter: No, when the night he his first night at the Opry, I went and then got really drunk and ended up.
• 17:04
  Chris Porter: We almost got arrested on the way to the after party.
• 17:06
  Casi Joy: Ooh, do tell, go into the room.
• 17:08
  Chris Porter: We were so after the Opry, Jelly and I are he's like, You're riding with me.
• 17:14
  Chris Porter: And I was like, Okay, and it's just me and Jelly in his truck, and he sparks up a joint, and we're smoking the joint, just having a great time, and all of a sudden Jelly gets quiet.
• 17:22
  Chris Porter: He goes, Mr.
• 17:23
  Chris Porter: Porter, I believe there is a member of the Tennessee Highway State Patrol behind us.
• 17:27
  Casi Joy: And it's not legal out there.
• 17:29
  Chris Porter: It is far from it.
• 17:30
  Casi Joy: Very not.
• 17:31
  Chris Porter: So in my head, I'm like, Well, I'm going to jail because I'm not letting Jelly not make the after party.
• 17:38
  Chris Porter: And I'm definitely not showing up by myself going, Jelly got busted.
• 17:41
  Chris Porter: Yeah, I've left him there.
• 17:43
  Chris Porter: So in my head, I'm like, okay, I'm gonna go to jail, and then I'll be there for the rest of the night, and we'll they'll come get me.
• 17:50
  Chris Porter: I wasn't real worried about it.
• 17:52
  Chris Porter: And then all of a sudden he goes, Well, he he passed us.
• 17:56
  Chris Porter: We're good.
• 17:57
  Chris Porter: And I remember Bunny pulled up next to us and was like, I thought you motherfuckers were going to jail.
• 18:02
  Chris Porter: And uh we uh ended up at the after party.
• 18:07
  Chris Porter: I was drunk, and I asked the guy that they had a band playing, and I went up and asked if I could play, and they said yeah.
• 18:13
  Chris Porter: And I started playing feeling alright.
• 18:16
  Casi Joy: Nice.
• 18:16
  Chris Porter: And uh we had a great so that's how Jelly knew I could play.
• 18:20
  Casi Joy: And uh he's out in the audience just scouting, he's like, There's my guy.
• 18:24
  Casi Joy: There's the guy.
• 18:25
  Chris Porter: And so yeah, the the issue was Jelly was so busy we never rehearsed.
• 18:31
  Chris Porter: So night one, I had never played guitar for more than 300 people in like a packed club, and night one was eight thousand.
• 18:39
  Chris Porter: How did you feel?
• 18:42
  Chris Porter: Like I needed to take a giant dump.
• 18:44
  Chris Porter: Like, and it was just but you didn't know.
• 18:48
  Chris Porter: And you know, Jelly, it's like no big deal.
• 18:51
  Chris Porter: So he he's literally looking at me going, all right, we're gonna go from first chorus into the bridge into that thing, and I was like, okay.
• 18:57
  Chris Porter: I was like, okay, I'll we'll figure it out.
• 19:02
  Chris Porter: So we get out there and I'm excited, we go to play, and there's like eight technical difficulties.
• 19:08
  Chris Porter: We're like, nothing's playing.
• 19:09
  Chris Porter: No, uh, and then no monitors, and then the monitors came on, and they weren't like we had mixed them in the sound check.
• 19:17
  Casi Joy: They never are.
• 19:18
  Chris Porter: And uh yeah, it's like, why do you even do it?
• 19:20
  Casi Joy: Why was why why did we sound check for two freaking hours?
• 19:23
  Chris Porter: And then it just came up and we're like, I forgot all of it.
• 19:25
  Chris Porter: And so, you know, some of the nights were good, some of the nights weren't.
• 19:30
  Chris Porter: I don't think the audience could tell.
• 19:32
  Chris Porter: Uh, but you know, we had a good time, and it was it was fantasy camp.
• 19:38
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 19:39
  Casi Joy: Oh, that sounds so fun.
• 19:40
  Casi Joy: And did I see you saying too on some of it?
• 19:44
  Chris Porter: Uh I don't think my mic was on.
• 19:46
  Chris Porter: You didn't need to say that.
• 19:48
  Chris Porter: I'm not sure.
• 19:48
  Casi Joy: You sounded great.
• 19:50
  Chris Porter: Uh I did some bac I did little backup things.
• 19:52
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 19:52
  Chris Porter: But I they were so minuscule that every time I went into the mic, I was like, that's not I didn't hear that.
• 19:59
  Casi Joy: But that's sometimes that's more fun.
• 20:01
  Casi Joy: You can just shout and really like get your face into it, and it's like everything is perfect.
• 20:06
  Chris Porter: See, I'm learning.
• 20:07
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 20:07
  Casi Joy: Sometimes when my guitar is super out of tune, I just turn it off and like really get into it, and I can do anything I want.
• 20:14
  Casi Joy: And I'm like, they can't hear me.
• 20:15
  Casi Joy: But then I see the sound guy like running around crazy trying to figure out why my guitar isn't coming through, and I'm like a little peel behind the curtain, a little trick I like to do, really keep the sound guys on their toes.
• 20:27
  Casi Joy: Um, okay, going back to Zach Myers of Shinedown, you also have you're like all over the place.
• 20:33
  Casi Joy: Uh are you a comedian or musician?
• 20:34
  Casi Joy: Like, what are you doing?
• 20:36
  Chris Porter: I'm a comedian that is very lucky.
• 20:38
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 20:38
  Casi Joy: But you're in the Campfire Astronauts?
• 20:41
  Casi Joy: Yes.
• 20:42
  Chris Porter: Zach and I do a comedy music thing called uh Campfire Astronauts, and it was it's basically us just sitting.
• 20:50
  Chris Porter: We we call it Welcome to a Night in Our Living Room because it's just us playing songs that we like and telling weird stories.
• 20:57
  Casi Joy: Okay, that's what I was gonna ask is is it comedy songs or comedy and no the songs are very serious.
• 21:03
  Chris Porter: I mean, as in the fact that they're just covers, but we don't we give them reverence, you know.
• 21:08
  Chris Porter: It's hard to play Poncho and Lefty and have and be funny about it.
• 21:13
  Chris Porter: Uh so but yeah, so it it's cool, it's fun when it goes well, it's great.
• 21:20
  Chris Porter: When it doesn't go well, it's kind of boring for everyone.
• 21:24
  Chris Porter: And uh we we had one night in Memphis, it was and it was like his whole family was there, and it was the worst show we've ever had.
• 21:34
  Casi Joy: No, why?
• 21:35
  Chris Porter: And uh the audience didn't know what we were doing.
• 21:39
  Chris Porter: Yeah, we were opening for their other band.
• 21:42
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 21:42
  Chris Porter: And so we showed up and we tried to explain it to them when we got up there, and uh they either weren't listening or didn't care.
• 21:51
  Chris Porter: And it it just from start to finish.
• 21:56
  Chris Porter: You you you know, you just have those shows where they're like, they're not into this.
• 21:59
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 22:00
  Casi Joy: At all.
• 22:00
  Casi Joy: It's really hard to reel a crowd in if you don't have them and you just get in your head and like, no, I suck, no, I believe you, you're right.
• 22:07
  Chris Porter: So and then I just remember walking off stage and Zach's wife going, No.
• 22:12
  Chris Porter: I was like, thanks.
• 22:14
  Casi Joy: Thank you so much.
• 22:15
  Casi Joy: Never doing that again.
• 22:16
  Casi Joy: Are you guys still playing, or is it kind of just like whenever you guys want and have the time?
• 22:22
  Chris Porter: It we will when you know Shinedown's on a they just released a record.
• 22:27
  Chris Porter: So they're on a two that two-year arena, travel the world.
• 22:31
  Chris Porter: We're the biggest band on earth.
• 22:33
  Chris Porter: Right.
• 22:33
  Chris Porter: Cycle.
• 22:34
  Casi Joy: You guys aren't gonna be the openers?
• 22:36
  Chris Porter: No, no, no, no.
• 22:38
  Chris Porter: I've opened for Shinedown, and that is not a fun game.
• 22:41
  Casi Joy: As just comedy?
• 22:42
  Chris Porter: As just comedy.
• 22:43
  Casi Joy: Well, what's that like?
• 22:45
  Chris Porter: It's awful.
• 22:46
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 22:47
  Casi Joy: I mean, it's amazing.
• 22:48
  Chris Porter: And I mean, and Shinedown gave me every opportunity for success.
• 22:51
  Chris Porter: Like the time I did it, we were at the Midland.
• 22:53
  Chris Porter: Uh advertised for weeks that I was gonna be there.
• 22:57
  Chris Porter: I took over their Instagram one day on the marquee, Shinedown, with Chris Porter.
• 23:02
  Chris Porter: And still when I walked out, they're like, oh, they were serious.
• 23:05
  Chris Porter: Like, oh, they're and you just go out there and like the first four rows are listening, and they're everyone else is just talking, and you can hear it clear as day.
• 23:16
  Chris Porter: And you just go up there and you you just go, I'm gonna say these you're just saying the act, you're not even putting effort into it because no one's listening.
• 23:25
  Casi Joy: Yeah, just trying to get to the end, just trying to get to the end.
• 23:29
  Chris Porter: And yeah.
• 23:30
  Casi Joy: That's something that is very different and I think way more challenging for stand-up than musicians, is that like if the crowd isn't feeling it, I can just close my eyes and be in my own world, and I'm loud enough that I don't hear every little thing.
• 23:43
  Casi Joy: But like, if it's not going well for you, like you can hear a pin drop, and then you're in your head, and like that's gotta be terrible.
• 23:50
  Casi Joy: I do not envy you.
• 23:52
  Chris Porter: And I you know, after doing it, it it used to really mess with me, like it would destroy me, yeah, those sets, and now it's almost as like, oh, it just happened with Bert.
• 24:04
  Chris Porter: We did the NASCAR thing, we did Daytona.
• 24:07
  Chris Porter: It was just the weirdest show ever.
• 24:10
  Chris Porter: It was me, then Hardy, then Bert, then Leonard Skinner.
• 24:15
  Casi Joy: Oh my gosh.
• 24:17
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 24:17
  Chris Porter: And we thought it was gonna be a Bert show with Leonard Skinner.
• 24:23
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 24:23
  Chris Porter: And what it was was a Leonard Skinner show with a bunch of comics that they did not want to be there.
• 24:28
  Casi Joy: Oh.
• 24:29
  Chris Porter: And so I go up first.
• 24:30
  Chris Porter: It's going okay, but it was definitely one of those shows where I got up there and I was like, oh, this is a terrible idea.
• 24:36
  Chris Porter: And I did the show, and 15 minutes into a 20-minute set, this old man with like a veteran's hat on starts yelling at me.
• 24:46
  Chris Porter: And I at first I was not paying him attention, and then finally I was like, What do you need?
• 24:51
  Chris Porter: And he was like, You can't be saying those words here.
• 24:54
  Chris Porter: He's like, You've got to watch your language around it.
• 24:57
  Chris Porter: Oh no.
• 24:57
  Chris Porter: He's like, This is a different show.
• 24:59
  Chris Porter: And I I I looked at him, I go, buddy, first off, no one gave me any content restrictions, no one said I couldn't say anything.
• 25:06
  Chris Porter: But also, if I offend you, buckle up.
• 25:10
  Chris Porter: Yeah, Bert.
• 25:10
  Chris Porter: Because here comes Bert.
• 25:12
  Chris Porter: And he's up there.
• 25:13
  Chris Porter: I I don't know what I can say and what I can't say on this show, but we don't know either.
• 25:17
  Casi Joy: We'll find out.
• 25:17
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 25:18
  Chris Porter: But he was Bert gets up there and starts talking about like black dicks and stinky pussy, and like I'm sitting there like and I'm just off stage staring at this man, and he's a and you know, and Leonard Skinnard's like I know a couple of those guys, and and and Stacy, one of the singers, I've known him for years, and they're good people, but their crew is very old and crotchety, and so it's like it's like, hey man, we're all on the same show.
• 25:52
  Chris Porter: Why are you busting my balls for being backstage?
• 25:54
  Chris Porter: Like you just saw me on stage.
• 25:56
  Chris Porter: I have every right to be here.
• 25:57
  Chris Porter: And they're like, well, you gotta stand over there.
• 26:00
  Chris Porter: I'm like, go to bed.
• 26:02
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 26:03
  Chris Porter: Like, I know it's past your bedtime.
• 26:05
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 26:06
  Chris Porter: And uh, so it was just a weird vibe, and but yeah, it it never failed.
• 26:11
  Chris Porter: Like, oh, uh when I used to travel around with the Black Crows, we went to some casino in Northern California, and it and they it was a it was a shit gig.
• 26:22
  Chris Porter: It was they played the food court of the casino.
• 26:25
  Chris Porter: And you're like, oh, you can be yeah, you can be the most legendary band in the world, and you're still gonna have bad gigs.
• 26:33
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 26:34
  Chris Porter: And uh and I just remember during the She Talks to Angels jam, Chris walked off stage and I walked up to him, and I was like, he was like, he's like, this sucks.
• 26:46
  Chris Porter: And I go, yeah, but you never know.
• 26:49
  Chris Porter: Maybe there's some guy here that's been wanting to see her show for 25 years, and this is the time he finally got enough money.
• 26:56
  Chris Porter: And he I remember I said that and he looked out at the audience, and he looked back at me, he goes, I'm not that guy.
• 27:04
  Chris Porter: I go, okay.
• 27:05
  Chris Porter: So yeah, it's uh it's just it'll never it'll never end.
• 27:14
  Chris Porter: No matter how famous, no matter how successful you get, you're gonna have one or two gigs where you're like, this was stupid.
• 27:19
  Chris Porter: This was a dumb idea.
• 27:20
  Chris Porter: And you end up and to be fair, those gigs usually pay the most.
• 27:26
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 27:26
  Casi Joy: Like private, like corporate y works or like not, you know, golf crowds aren't usually you'd think like you're drinking on the golf course, but they're usually like not the most fun crowd, and it's the ones where yeah, you're making the most money.
• 27:42
  Chris Porter: That's and you're up there just counting, thinking about what you're gonna spend all this money on, because it's the only thing that's gonna make you happy.
• 27:49
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 27:49
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 27:49
  Casi Joy: But at least with music, like I can just go song to song to song and just get through it and be in my own head and enjoy my own music.
• 27:57
  Casi Joy: But like with comedy, I just feel like I would be stumbling over my words and just getting in my head and just all of that happens.
• 28:06
  Chris Porter: A little bit of crying, a little bit of crying, a little bit of but you know, you just have to you get to an age or a or a point in your career where you're like, this is what it is.
• 28:16
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 28:17
  Chris Porter: And I'm and it's gonna be over before you know it.
• 28:20
  Casi Joy: Mm-hmm.
• 28:20
  Casi Joy: And so it's just an hour.
• 28:21
  Casi Joy: You can do anything for an hour.
• 28:23
  Chris Porter: Can do anything for an hour.
• 28:25
  Casi Joy: Maybe not anything.
• 28:26
  Casi Joy: Um okay, so let's talk about your special middle rage.
• 28:30
  Chris Porter: Yes.
• 28:31
  Casi Joy: Was hilarious and so relatable.
• 28:35
  Chris Porter: Thank you.
• 28:35
  Casi Joy: And I will tell the audience a bad thing.
• 28:38
  Casi Joy: I was a little mad at you when I was watching it, because I was holding my four-month-old baby.
• 28:44
  Casi Joy: I was nap trapped, she was asleep.
• 28:47
  Casi Joy: And there was one part where I was like, like trying not to like full body shake while I'm holding her.
• 28:55
  Chris Porter: I'm like, hey, I swear to God, if you wake this kid up.
• 29:01
  Casi Joy: How dare you?
• 29:02
  Casi Joy: Um, so the the beginning you kind of open up about like the good old days and good old-fashioned boredom.
• 29:10
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 29:10
  Casi Joy: Kids don't even know about anymore.
• 29:12
  Casi Joy: Um, and just kind of having like no technology.
• 29:16
  Casi Joy: And now with the industry changing so much, do you think it's made comedy easier or harder with kind of how things it's not so much about like just getting hoping to get scouted in the crowd?
• 29:29
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 29:29
  Chris Porter: Uh it's both.
• 29:31
  Chris Porter: It's it's better.
• 29:34
  Chris Porter: I I wouldn't say it's easier.
• 29:36
  Chris Porter: It's better for a lot of the reasons we were talking about earlier where like you kind of control your own boat.
• 29:42
  Chris Porter: Uh you can you can become successful without someone else's help.
• 29:47
  Chris Porter: Uh, and you uh you get as much as you put into it.
• 29:52
  Chris Porter: Uh on that same token, are there people that are getting notoriety that probably shouldn't?
• 29:59
  Chris Porter: Yes.
• 30:00
  Chris Porter: And does that suck?
• 30:01
  Chris Porter: Yes.
• 30:02
  Chris Porter: But again, like we said earlier, those people tend to burn out and fade away pretty quickly.
• 30:07
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 30:08
  Chris Porter: So uh and you know, I I've seen a lot of folks my age or near my age that just won't do it and and aren't successful because of it.
• 30:20
  Chris Porter: And so uh I don't know, but I don't think those people would be successful if it was the old way either.
• 30:28
  Chris Porter: So it's just uh I think it does make it easier, uh, but it also makes it harder in the fact that you're kind of always drowning in this business.
• 30:39
  Casi Joy: Yeah, it's like did you post three times today?
• 30:41
  Casi Joy: And have you did you do your story and did you use the right hashtags?
• 30:44
  Chris Porter: And and you know, luckily I've gotten to a point in my career where I can pay someone else to do that.
• 30:49
  Casi Joy: Nice.
• 30:49
  Casi Joy: I was gonna ask that too of like, are you because you've been really active on socials, like posting so much about your tour and your special someone has.
• 30:57
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 30:57
  Chris Porter: Someone has.
• 30:58
  Chris Porter: I don't even have TikTok on my phone.
• 31:00
  Casi Joy: Oh, good for you and your mental health.
• 31:02
  Chris Porter: Yeah, and uh and that's why I did it.
• 31:05
  Chris Porter: It's like, yeah, I could do this.
• 31:07
  Chris Porter: I'm not as good as this other person that I hired to do it, and it's also destroying me.
• 31:12
  Chris Porter: And uh she's very good at what she does, and it just takes a lot of it off my plate and allows me to uh enjoy the my career.
• 31:22
  Casi Joy: Yeah, instead of making it about living on your phone and like leaving a set and then immediately going and like editing a video on your phone and Hey, I'm gonna I'm gonna be here coming.
• 31:33
  Chris Porter: And you know, you still gotta shoot those things or whatever, but at least at that point I just send it to my Dropbox and it's over.
• 31:40
  Casi Joy: And she captions it and yeah, because that captioning is half the battle.
• 31:43
  Casi Joy: Okay, so speaking of the good old days and like entertaining ourselves till the streetlights came on.
• 31:50
  Casi Joy: Did you ever have a time back in the day where you look back now and you're like, my god, that was dangerous, and I probably could have died looking back on that now?
• 32:00
  Chris Porter: Almost all of it.
• 32:00
  Chris Porter: Um all of it, just I grew up out in the sticks, so like it was it was coming up, so like I lived in a neighborhood, and then there was like a neighborhood a mile away, and then another neighborhood a mile up past that, but in between that was all farmland, and like I went to a school where some people were far had farms, you know, not all of us, but there was definitely a large swath of people that they'd come to school and they'd been up since four in the morning baling hay and oh man.
• 32:30
  Chris Porter: Uh so but yeah, we were out there launching bottle rockets at each other, trying to make I talk about it in the special making bombs out of aerosol cans, just complete pyro idiots.
• 32:44
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 32:45
  Chris Porter: And yeah, there were several times we could have just been injured or died, or and we were just very fortunate, and you know, I remember being 12 and 13 riding dirt, like actual motorized motorcycles.
• 33:02
  Chris Porter: And no one cared.
• 33:04
  Casi Joy: I would never as a mother now.
• 33:06
  Casi Joy: Like, I just think back to like the stuff that we did as kids, and I'm like, you're not actually leaving the house.
• 33:12
  Casi Joy: I will be one of the parents with a tracker on my child.
• 33:15
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 33:16
  Chris Porter: See, I I think I'll be the you know, my parents were very yeah, go.
• 33:21
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 33:22
  Chris Porter: And that was the best.
• 33:23
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 33:24
  Chris Porter: I mean, but also we lived I could only get so far away.
• 33:28
  Chris Porter: Like uh but I knew I wasn't gonna leave the neighborhood because there wasn't anything past that.
• 33:33
  Chris Porter: Yeah, that's true.
• 33:35
  Casi Joy: But there's always those weird vans that drive by and stuff.
• 33:37
  Chris Porter: I mean, yeah, it's you know, that was one of the nice things about living out in the sticks.
• 33:41
  Casi Joy: I think all the perves were not a lot of windowless vans.
• 33:44
  Chris Porter: They stayed enough gas money to get all the way out to Western Shawnee.
• 33:48
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 33:49
  Casi Joy: I uh uh was thinking about this question when I was gonna ask it.
• 33:52
  Casi Joy: Um, my parents like, did you ever get like dropped off at the mall for whole days and you just felt like a total big kid?
• 33:59
  Chris Porter: And I mean, I don't know about whole days, but and I would have to beg.
• 34:03
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 34:03
  Chris Porter: I'd have please, please don't come with me.
• 34:06
  Casi Joy: Yeah, oh yeah.
• 34:06
  Chris Porter: Please just drop me.
• 34:08
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 34:08
  Chris Porter: And you know, that was when, you know, kids were getting shot for starter jackets and stuff like that.
• 34:14
  Chris Porter: It was you know, it wasn't happening at Oak Park Mall, but you know, my mom didn't know that.
• 34:20
  Chris Porter: Right.
• 34:21
  Chris Porter: And so, yeah, but I and I also remember going to the mall with my parents and walking eight feet in front of them.
• 34:29
  Chris Porter: Mainly because my dad would wear a camouflage to the mall.
• 34:33
  Casi Joy: Oh, well, no one could see him then.
• 34:35
  Casi Joy: Who's dad?
• 34:40
  Chris Porter: Oh, yeah.
• 34:40
  Chris Porter: I don't see anybody.
• 34:42
  Casi Joy: I see no dad.
• 34:42
  Casi Joy: You are an independent man.
• 34:44
  Chris Porter: He was he still is a character, that that man.
• 34:48
  Casi Joy: That was another time that I laughed out loud.
• 34:51
  Casi Joy: I was watching your uh Man from Kansas special, and you were telling the story about um and sons.
• 34:58
  Casi Joy: What?
• 34:58
  Casi Joy: And sons.
• 34:59
  Chris Porter: And sons.
• 35:00
  Chris Porter: Oh, my friend is oh, and you killed up.
• 35:03
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 35:04
  Casi Joy: No, but it was the part about your dad um just re-electrocuting himself.
• 35:09
  Casi Joy: Oh, yeah.
• 35:09
  Casi Joy: And when you there's this part where, oh my god, I feel like this is me like postpartum that like things really get me going and laughing, and I might cry.
• 35:18
  Casi Joy: But you were like, and that was another time I'm like holding Quinn and I'm like, God damn it, Chris.
• 35:25
  Casi Joy: Like it was just, I don't know, it just came out of nowhere.
• 35:30
  Chris Porter: Literally, uh, there's no exaggeration of any of those stories.
• 35:33
  Chris Porter: Uh he he he's just very he's a very stubborn man, even to this day.
• 35:39
  Casi Joy: As as a dad should be.
• 35:40
  Casi Joy: And is his name Scott?
• 35:41
  Chris Porter: His name is Scott.
• 35:42
  Casi Joy: My baby girl's name is Quinn Scott.
• 35:44
  Casi Joy: Oh, really?
• 35:45
  Casi Joy: Is it after your dad or my dad?
• 35:47
  Casi Joy: We'll never know.
• 35:48
  Chris Porter: We'll never know.
• 35:48
  Chris Porter: Let's hope it's your dad.
• 35:49
  Casi Joy: We'll never know.
• 35:50
  Chris Porter: Because you only spent like one night with my dad.
• 35:53
  Casi Joy: Yeah, but it's blurry.
• 35:55
  Chris Porter: But it meant so much.
• 35:57
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 35:59
  Casi Joy: Um, okay, so back in the day, did you have an AOL Instant Messenger?
• 36:05
  Chris Porter: Yes.
• 36:06
  Chris Porter: What was your screen name?
• 36:07
  Chris Porter: I don't remember.
• 36:08
  Casi Joy: No.
• 36:09
  Chris Porter: I I wasn't on it very much because I think by the time AOL came out, I think I was driving.
• 36:15
  Chris Porter: I think I was having a couple of years.
• 36:16
  Casi Joy: Or like had a real phone at that point.
• 36:18
  Chris Porter: Or a pager.
• 36:18
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 36:18
  Chris Porter: I think I had a beeper.
• 36:20
  Casi Joy: Oh man, I got to bring my dad's pager to the mall for the full day thing.
• 36:23
  Casi Joy: So I was like, I got the pager so I could tell him when I was ready.
• 36:25
  Chris Porter: Oh, I remember the alpha numer I remember I had an alphanumeric pager that I would keep in my pocket because you weren't supposed to have them in school.
• 36:31
  Casi Joy: Oh, yeah.
• 36:32
  Chris Porter: And my dad would always send me messages throughout the day.
• 36:35
  Casi Joy: Dad.
• 36:35
  Casi Joy: Um, did you have a MySpace?
• 36:38
  Chris Porter: Yep.
• 36:39
  Casi Joy: Oh, what was your screen name?
• 36:40
  Casi Joy: I just feel like screen names tell a lot about people.
• 36:42
  Chris Porter: I get I it was probably CPOR, you know, I was pretty standard.
• 36:49
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 36:49
  Chris Porter: I don't I when I did MySpace, I wasn't using it as a marketing thing.
• 36:54
  Casi Joy: I was just using it as a You weren't using it as like as we all were as like a passive aggressive way to like get a girl or a guy or like post a song on your side.
• 37:02
  Casi Joy: Oh, I'm sure very much posting the lyrics and like you don't know, I'm like sad and sad.
• 37:06
  Chris Porter: Dude, these Facebook memories come up of like 17 years ago where I just post these stupid song lyrics.
• 37:12
  Chris Porter: Who was I?
• 37:14
  Casi Joy: What am I doing?
• 37:15
  Casi Joy: Yeah, and you just hope no one else can see them.
• 37:17
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 37:17
  Chris Porter: God.
• 37:19
  Casi Joy: My MySpace name, this is how dramatic I was, was Eyes of a Tragedy.
• 37:24
  Casi Joy: Wow.
• 37:25
  Casi Joy: Which is an from in a perfect circle song if you're a fan of them.
• 37:29
  Casi Joy: It's just a really uh I was a very sad middle schooler.
• 37:34
  Chris Porter: We all were.
• 37:35
  Casi Joy: It's so bad.
• 37:36
  Chris Porter: No one's happy in middle school.
• 37:37
  Chris Porter: No, even the pretty popular girl sad in in middle school.
• 37:41
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 37:42
  Casi Joy: I have one one of my nephews, of course, he's a boy, so it's a little bit better, I feel like, for boys, but he's going into middle school and I'm like, oh dear God.
• 37:49
  Chris Porter: Yeah, sorry.
• 37:50
  Chris Porter: This is literally the worst time of your life.
• 37:51
  Casi Joy: You're getting ready to just cry every single day and be made fun of.
• 37:55
  Chris Porter: Nothing will make sense.
• 37:56
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 37:56
  Chris Porter: Everyone seems like they hate you.
• 37:58
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 37:58
  Casi Joy: Plus TikTok now.
• 38:00
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 38:00
  Chris Porter: And by the way, it's all your fault.
• 38:02
  Casi Joy: Yeah, exactly.
• 38:03
  Casi Joy: Um, okay, let's talk more about stand-up.
• 38:08
  Casi Joy: Um and Bri, can I get a refail?
• 38:11
  Casi Joy: I packed my own lunchbox of white claws because when you said you wanted tequila, I was like, I don't know who I'll be on tequila after because I I haven't really been going hard in the paint since becoming a mom.
• 38:27
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 38:27
  Casi Joy: And I know that I can still hold down the law if I'm drinking a claw.
• 38:32
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 38:33
  Casi Joy: So I was like, let's stick to what I know.
• 38:36
  Casi Joy: So I packed my own little lunchbox of white claws.
• 38:39
  Casi Joy: Um okay, how do you feel about I feel like crowd work has become so popular with stand-up, kind of with the social media games.
• 38:49
  Chris Porter: Yes.
• 38:50
  Chris Porter: Well, a lot of it is like I post a lot of crowd work because I don't want to burn material.
• 38:56
  Casi Joy: Like, yeah, you don't want to post like your entire special while I'm writing it.
• 39:01
  Chris Porter: So you do crowd work like I literally in the middle of my set will go, Do you have any questions?
• 39:06
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 39:06
  Chris Porter: And then I I I'll give them guidelines.
• 39:09
  Chris Porter: And that's where you mine for the social clips.
• 39:13
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 39:14
  Chris Porter: Is is in there.
• 39:16
  Chris Porter: Cause I also my stand-up's usually so well structured that it doesn't give it a lot of time for audience to like chime in on their own.
• 39:24
  Casi Joy: And what happens if they just do?
• 39:26
  Casi Joy: Like, do you ever have people who are like, and what about this?
• 39:29
  Casi Joy: Every once in a while, damn it, Tina.
• 39:32
  Chris Porter: Most of the time I just I'll let it sit there and I'll go, okay.
• 39:37
  Chris Porter: Comedy's hard, isn't it?
• 39:38
  Casi Joy: Uh-huh.
• 39:39
  Chris Porter: Because they thought it was gonna be really funny, and it always just lays there.
• 39:42
  Chris Porter: Uh and so uh, but yeah, I I do like a question and answer specifically just to have clips for the ins for the internet.
• 39:53
  Casi Joy: That's really smart.
• 39:54
  Chris Porter: And now there are people like Ian Bag and Matt Reif and these cats that like that's their act.
• 39:59
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 40:00
  Chris Porter: Is they do cry and they're really good.
• 40:02
  Casi Joy: That seems so stressful.
• 40:04
  Casi Joy: It's it's it's like you don't know who you're gonna show up as in the day.
• 40:08
  Casi Joy: Like, are you gonna be on it or like oh it's a slow brain day?
• 40:11
  Chris Porter: Yeah, whole day sucked.
• 40:12
  Chris Porter: And and you know, and thing is you never see those shows.
• 40:16
  Casi Joy: That's true.
• 40:17
  Chris Porter: Yeah, they're just on, it's crazy.
• 40:19
  Casi Joy: Yeah, it's nuts.
• 40:20
  Chris Porter: Uh so yeah, I mean there's always been crowd work comics.
• 40:25
  Chris Porter: Yeah, it's always been a thing.
• 40:27
  Chris Porter: Uh it's hard, you know, we're always taught not to do that because it's hard like no one will record a special of that.
• 40:35
  Chris Porter: And like that's why Matt's first special was so poorly received was because everyone was used to him doing this crowd work, and then when he did bits, it wasn't as strong as his crowd work was because it's not his normal thing.
• 40:52
  Chris Porter: But to try to to spend a hundred and twenty thousand dollars or whatever it costs to film a special and have it all writing on whether or not the audience is giving you good stuff, giving you good stuff.
• 41:05
  Chris Porter: That's a that's rolling the dice.
• 41:07
  Chris Porter: That's so scary.
• 41:08
  Casi Joy: That makes me nervous.
• 41:08
  Chris Porter: And a lot of companies won't do it, and so a lot of the guys that when they do their crowd work specials, they'll they'll have to self-produce it.
• 41:16
  Casi Joy: Okay, yeah.
• 41:17
  Casi Joy: So um, have you ever had like a super embarrassing moment on stage?
• 41:25
  Chris Porter: I mean, yeah, sure.
• 41:26
  Chris Porter: Uh I'm sure subconsciously I've blocked it out.
• 41:31
  Chris Porter: Uh you know, uh like forgetting the words or no.
• 41:37
  Casi Joy: Uh I guess it's different.
• 41:40
  Chris Porter: Very early on, I ate mushrooms and tried to go on stage.
• 41:44
  Casi Joy: Hey, that sounds like a great idea.
• 41:46
  Chris Porter: It did.
• 41:47
  Chris Porter: And then it wasn't.
• 41:48
  Chris Porter: It did.
• 41:48
  Chris Porter: It did.
• 41:49
  Chris Porter: It sounded like a brilliant idea.
• 41:50
  Casi Joy: Oh man.
• 41:51
  Chris Porter: Well, it was something my heroes had done, you know.
• 41:54
  Chris Porter: There was always talk about Doug Stanhope doing it, and blah, blah, blah.
• 41:59
  Chris Porter: You know, we were young and stupid.
• 42:02
  Chris Porter: And I I was still living here, I hadn't moved to LA yet, and a buddy of mine called and was like, I got some, and why don't we do them and then go do open mic night?
• 42:11
  Chris Porter: And I was like, Yeah, that sounds like fun.
• 42:13
  Chris Porter: And uh the people that ran the open mic night were in on it.
• 42:18
  Chris Porter: We showed up, and it was.
• 42:21
  Chris Porter: I just remember right before I went on stage, like a girl came up and talked to me, and I I could barely focus on her face.
• 42:29
  Casi Joy: Oh no.
• 42:30
  Chris Porter: And I'm like, this is not good.
• 42:32
  Chris Porter: And they called me up on stage, and I remember shaking the host's hand and thinking to myself, just tell them it's okay and that you don't want to do it.
• 42:42
  Chris Porter: Like I generally was gonna be like, So you had a safe out.
• 42:46
  Chris Porter: And I didn't, I I didn't.
• 42:48
  Chris Porter: I was like, ah, okay.
• 42:50
  Chris Porter: And I just remember the lights hit me and everything closed in and I wasn't talking.
• 42:55
  Chris Porter: And then my brain was like, hey, you're not talking.
• 42:58
  Chris Porter: Like you should be talking, and you're not.
• 43:02
  Chris Porter: So I start, and no matter how at that point, no matter how drunk or stoned I'd been, if I started a bit, my brain would take over and I could do it.
• 43:12
  Chris Porter: And so I was like, I started the bit and then went right back into mushroom land, and then I was like, oh, I'm not talking again.
• 43:21
  Chris Porter: And then the thought came, or have I been talking and I haven't just and I haven't realized it.
• 43:27
  Casi Joy: You need to keep checking.
• 43:28
  Chris Porter: And I'm like, I don't know which one of these it is.
• 43:30
  Chris Porter: So then I start throwing out punch lines to jokes I haven't set up yet.
• 43:35
  Chris Porter: Like, it's just at this point, it's just words.
• 43:38
  Chris Porter: And and the only people laughing are the people that know what's going on.
• 43:43
  Chris Porter: And I can hear the other guy that I'm tripping with in the back, laughing so hard, he's pounding the back wall.
• 43:50
  Chris Porter: And I just go, I can't do this right now.
• 43:54
  Chris Porter: And I ran off stage.
• 43:56
  Chris Porter: And I run off stage, and in my In my head, I've ruined my career.
• 44:01
  Chris Porter: It's all over.
• 44:03
  Chris Porter: And I run downstairs and I'm like, it's over.
• 44:06
  Chris Porter: I'm never gonna work again.
• 44:07
  Chris Porter: And my buddy comes down and he's like, You're fine.
• 44:09
  Casi Joy: He's like, Is it your best set you've ever done?
• 44:12
  Chris Porter: He's like, You're still going to Little Rock on Thursday.
• 44:14
  Chris Porter: Like, no one, no one knows about this.
• 44:17
  Chris Porter: And I go, okay, okay.
• 44:18
  Chris Porter: And I walked back up on stage, or I walk back up to the showroom.
• 44:23
  Chris Porter: And I don't know if you've ever done mushrooms, but there's a there's a weird feeling of everyone staring at you.
• 44:30
  Chris Porter: Well, that's multiplied several times when everyone is staring at you.
• 44:36
  Casi Joy: My God.
• 44:36
  Chris Porter: Because I walk in the room, and I don't know if you've ever been to the old Stanfords, but you walk kind of like in the side of the room.
• 44:43
  Chris Porter: And I walked in, and when you open the door, like light came in.
• 44:47
  Chris Porter: So I opened the door and I turned and everyone turns around.
• 44:51
  Chris Porter: It's like and I go and I sit in back and I just sit there and I no one has any cooth or tact whatsoever.
• 45:00
  Chris Porter: They're all just turned around like that's him.
• 45:02
  Chris Porter: And I was like, This is so bad.
• 45:04
  Chris Porter: This is so bad.
• 45:06
  Chris Porter: And one of the comics came up to me and he goes, I want to know what made you do that.
• 45:13
  Casi Joy: I'll have what he's at.
• 45:15
  Chris Porter: And I said, Pretty much, and I go go talk to so-and-so, and he did, and within 45 minutes, he had sold all of it.
• 45:26
  Chris Porter: Well, so I was like the best advertising for mushroom chocolates there have ever been.
• 45:32
  Casi Joy: Does someone have a recording of it and they could just put that back out and be like, and shrooms per sale?
• 45:36
  Casi Joy: God, I hope not.
• 45:37
  Chris Porter: It was the only thing more embarrassing than that was when I sang, take me out to the ball game at the Royals.
• 45:44
  Casi Joy: Yeah, why was that embarrassing?
• 45:46
  Casi Joy: You're a good singer.
• 45:47
  Chris Porter: Well.
• 45:48
  Casi Joy: Uh-oh.
• 45:50
  Chris Porter: Uh, it was like 2011, 2010.
• 45:53
  Chris Porter: So we're not a great team.
• 45:54
  Chris Porter: We have Zach Granke.
• 45:55
  Chris Porter: Zach Granke's pitching, and it's Buck Knight.
• 45:58
  Casi Joy: Oh.
• 45:59
  Chris Porter: Sold out.
• 45:59
  Chris Porter: Sold out.
• 46:01
  Chris Porter: Uh I'm sure you know that they don't let you rehearse anything.
• 46:06
  Chris Porter: And there's a major delay between what you're singing and what's coming out of the speaker.
• 46:12
  Chris Porter: Yes.
• 46:12
  Chris Porter: So they don't let you rehearse.
• 46:16
  Chris Porter: So in my head, it was like a Frank Sinatra, like, take me out to the ball game.
• 46:22
  Chris Porter: And it's take me out to the ball game.
• 46:25
  Casi Joy: Because they give you a time limit, too, don't they?
• 46:26
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 46:27
  Chris Porter: Well, and there's a backing track.
• 46:29
  Casi Joy: Oh.
• 46:29
  Chris Porter: So they give you an earpiece.
• 46:32
  Chris Porter: I stay, I go, take me out, earpiece falls out.
• 46:37
  Chris Porter: So now I'm only hearing what's coming out of the speaker, which is two seconds old.
• 46:42
  Casi Joy: Yeah, a year after you said it.
• 46:44
  Chris Porter: And so I've tried, it's not going well.
• 46:46
  Chris Porter: A kid throws a peanut at me.
• 46:48
  Chris Porter: No.
• 46:48
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 46:49
  Chris Porter: Well deserved, by the way.
• 46:51
  Chris Porter: Because I am struggling.
• 46:53
  Chris Porter: My dad, and I'm standing on the Royals dugout while all this is happening.
• 46:58
  Chris Porter: My dad is filming it.
• 47:00
  Chris Porter: He's laughing so hard he's crying.
• 47:03
  Chris Porter: My face is on the jumbotrot of just be like, uh getting the peanut.
• 47:09
  Casi Joy: I hope that works.
• 47:10
  Chris Porter: I couldn't get out of that stadium fast enough.
• 47:13
  Casi Joy: And you can't sing it any faster because you hear the delay.
• 47:16
  Casi Joy: So you think you're singing faster and you can't speed up.
• 47:20
  Chris Porter: My family is not nice.
• 47:22
  Chris Porter: Like, we're not nice to each other.
• 47:25
  Chris Porter: We're very real.
• 47:26
  Chris Porter: And so it was a weekend of just gut shot, just ribbing me by the way.
• 47:31
  Chris Porter: Finally, Sunday, it starts to die off.
• 47:35
  Chris Porter: Monday, I think we've moved on.
• 47:37
  Chris Porter: My dad comes in and he's got an envelope in his hand.
• 47:42
  Chris Porter: He's holding it up like he'd won a trophy.
• 47:43
  Chris Porter: He goes, They sent a DVD.
• 47:46
  Chris Porter: Yes, yes! And I'm like, no.
• 47:49
  Chris Porter: And they put it in.
• 47:50
  Chris Porter: It's a 13-camera shoot with just audience shots of them like, what is hammer?
• 47:58
  Casi Joy: What?
• 47:58
  Casi Joy: What is happening?
• 47:58
  Casi Joy: And it's probably even worse because there's no room noise on those DVDs they send you.
• 48:02
  Casi Joy: It's just dry.
• 48:04
  Chris Porter: It's just the board.
• 48:04
  Chris Porter: It's disgusting.
• 48:05
  Chris Porter: Oh, and I I grabbed the DV now, like, you will never see this again.
• 48:10
  Casi Joy: No, please send it to us.
• 48:11
  Casi Joy: We can use it for the intro.
• 48:13
  Chris Porter: Pretty sure I threw it away when I moved back to Kansas.
• 48:15
  Chris Porter: I think I found it.
• 48:16
  Chris Porter: I was like, this can only do harm.
• 48:19
  Casi Joy: One of the first times I sang for the Royals, um, I think I was like 14, and now they have you wear in ears, and so I wear both ears in, so I can't hear the echo.
• 48:31
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 48:32
  Casi Joy: And there were no ears at that time.
• 48:33
  Casi Joy: And I started singing it, and you're only allowed to sing 90 a 90-second-long anthem, which is a fast as hell anthem.
• 48:40
  Casi Joy: And I was singing it so slow because it's oh can you, oh my god, my mom literally thought I was having a stroke at the age of 14 and was about to come down onto the field to like save me.
• 48:57
  Casi Joy: And I, you know, 10 minutes later, Taylor Swift's uh version of the uh anthem got through.
• 49:05
  Casi Joy: So terrible, and now I wear two ears and I crank it.
• 49:09
  Chris Porter: A long, a long anthem can be tough as a spectator, because there's been several times where you're like, and you can from the beginning, you know if it's gonna be bad because she's like, oh you're like, oh, this is gonna be eight minutes.
• 49:24
  Casi Joy: They're doing the most too much.
• 49:27
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 49:28
  Casi Joy: Calm down.
• 49:28
  Casi Joy: There's you can do a little vocal acrobatics, but I like to I'll give two per anthem.
• 49:36
  Casi Joy: Just a little uh every once in a while, but I'm not gonna like Mariah carry it.
• 49:41
  Casi Joy: Because also you never have the time.
• 49:43
  Casi Joy: We got 90 seconds in it.
• 49:44
  Chris Porter: Do you do the octave jump?
• 49:45
  Chris Porter: I do.
• 49:46
  Chris Porter: Okay, that's great.
• 49:47
  Casi Joy: That's one of the only ones I'll allow for myself.
• 49:49
  Chris Porter: Yeah, yeah.
• 49:50
  Chris Porter: That's it when it goes well, it it nails it.
• 49:53
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 49:54
  Chris Porter: But every once in a while they get to like seven and a half.
• 49:57
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 49:57
  Casi Joy: And yeah, almost.
• 49:58
  Casi Joy: And sometimes you can hear when someone starts too high and you're like, oh no, in like a minute and a half.
• 50:04
  Casi Joy: You have to just watch their heartbreak.
• 50:07
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 50:07
  Casi Joy: And they like look around, like, what do I do?
• 50:09
  Casi Joy: And you're like, there's nowhere else to go.
• 50:11
  Casi Joy: You gotta go up.
• 50:12
  Casi Joy: Just go low.
• 50:13
  Casi Joy: Just go low.
• 50:15
  Casi Joy: So sad.
• 50:16
  Casi Joy: Or the there's a video that was viral of this guy that was like, and the ramparts were da, and the ramparts were duh duh.
• 50:24
  Casi Joy: Well, the ramparts.
• 50:26
  Casi Joy: Wasn't that what it was?
• 50:26
  Casi Joy: He just kept singing about the ramparts.
• 50:29
  Casi Joy: The bombs were still there.
• 50:30
  Casi Joy: Oh, the bombs were still there.
• 50:32
  Casi Joy: Didn't Aguilera mess it up pretty good one time?
• 50:34
  Casi Joy: Aguilera?
• 50:35
  Casi Joy: No, Fergie's was.
• 50:36
  Casi Joy: Did you hear Fergie's?
• 50:37
  Chris Porter: Oh, Fergie.
• 50:38
  Chris Porter: First off, to let's not compare Fergie to Aguilera's.
• 50:41
  Chris Porter: Oh, yeah.
• 50:41
  Chris Porter: Sorry, that's very bad.
• 50:42
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 50:44
  Casi Joy: Speaking of Christine Aguilera, Fergie.
• 50:46
  Casi Joy: Fergie.
• 50:48
  Chris Porter: Oh.
• 50:48
  Chris Porter: There's nothing worse than her doing uh Gimme Shelter with Mick Jagger and you too.
• 50:56
  Casi Joy: Oh yeah.
• 50:56
  Casi Joy: That wasn't the one where she peed her pants, was it?
• 51:00
  Chris Porter: No.
• 51:00
  Chris Porter: I mean, Fergie has a couple of clips where you're like, just go home.
• 51:05
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 51:06
  Casi Joy: There was one where she was doing like a one-handed front walkover and it was during uh she was doing Barracuda.
• 51:11
  Casi Joy: And she's like, and then decides to do it again.
• 51:17
  Casi Joy: And I'm like, no, girlfriend.
• 51:20
  Chris Porter: Or what about the Good Morning America where she's like seducing the toddlers?
• 51:24
  Casi Joy: That's the one.
• 51:25
  Casi Joy: Oh, yeah.
• 51:26
  Casi Joy: But God love Fergie.
• 51:28
  Casi Joy: She really is such a talented singer.
• 51:29
  Casi Joy: There's just been a lot of moments that have been questionable.
• 51:34
  Chris Porter: Yes.
• 51:34
  Chris Porter: And that's and that's where you're like, you gotta you have to know your what you can do as a singer, and you have to stay in that moment.
• 51:41
  Casi Joy: And don't push it when it's live on TV.
• 51:44
  Chris Porter: No, you push it when you're practicing.
• 51:45
  Casi Joy: Yeah, for real.
• 51:46
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 51:47
  Casi Joy: But you know, lover lady lumps.
• 51:49
  Casi Joy: All right.
• 51:50
  Casi Joy: Your next stop is uh Las Vegas.
• 51:53
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 51:53
  Casi Joy: In like a few days, I feel like I do it three times a year.
• 51:56
  Casi Joy: Man, going to Jimmy Kimmel's.
• 51:58
  Casi Joy: Jimmy Kimmel's that is so cool.
• 52:00
  Chris Porter: What's and it's a great room.
• 52:01
  Chris Porter: It's I used to, you know, I I have a very famous bit about how I used to hate Vegas.
• 52:07
  Chris Porter: And uh I love it now.
• 52:09
  Casi Joy: Is it like are comedy clubs out there?
• 52:11
  Casi Joy: Is it like going to a show?
• 52:13
  Casi Joy: Like, is it what's it's going to a show?
• 52:15
  Casi Joy: It's, you know.
• 52:15
  Casi Joy: Are there shows?
• 52:19
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 52:19
  Chris Porter: It's, you know, you're dealing with a lot of tourists.
• 52:22
  Chris Porter: It's some shows are great.
• 52:24
  Chris Porter: The late shows are train wrecks, but they're paying you so it's again, they they pay you so much money, you're like, it is what it is.
• 52:31
  Chris Porter: And then I I go a night early, I have a nice dinner.
• 52:35
  Chris Porter: I don't really gamble.
• 52:37
  Chris Porter: I c I do sometimes, but it's not like my thing.
• 52:40
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 52:40
  Chris Porter: So like Thursday I fly out, I'll have dinner with a friend.
• 52:44
  Chris Porter: Uh I get I have a very nice hotel room, and then, you know, do shows Friday, Saturday, and then I'm doing a very rock star thing.
• 52:56
  Chris Porter: Oh.
• 52:56
  Chris Porter: Saturday after the late show.
• 52:58
  Chris Porter: Walk off stage, go directly to my friend's plane, and fly, fly out of town.
• 53:04
  Casi Joy: Okay, Chris Porter.
• 53:05
  Chris Porter: It's gonna be nuts.
• 53:07
  Casi Joy: He's big, he's big.
• 53:08
  Casi Joy: And then in December is is your next time back playing it.
• 53:14
  Chris Porter: Is the week the yearly Kansas City Zona Rosa.
• 53:18
  Casi Joy: Oh, oh, at the Improv?
• 53:20
  Chris Porter: Uh it used to be the Improv, now it's the funny boat.
• 53:22
  Chris Porter: Same building, they just changed the signage.
• 53:25
  Chris Porter: It's all money.
• 53:26
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 53:27
  Casi Joy: And that's the last time we saw you.
• 53:28
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 53:29
  Casi Joy: That's been a minute.
• 53:30
  Chris Porter: Um, if you're in town, you're more than welcome.
• 53:32
  Chris Porter: Oh, we'll get to there.
• 53:33
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 53:33
  Casi Joy: I'm sure we'll be free.
• 53:35
  Casi Joy: We'll make ourselves free.
• 53:37
  Chris Porter: Very cool.
• 53:37
  Casi Joy: Um, do you prefer a big stage or a small stage?
• 53:41
  Chris Porter: They're both great.
• 53:42
  Chris Porter: I prefer a a big I'd rather be on a stage that's too big than a stage that's too small.
• 53:48
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 53:48
  Chris Porter: Just because I'm 6'4 and I can fall off them pretty easy.
• 53:52
  Chris Porter: Uh one of my first sets ever in New York was like a front room at like the New York Comedy Club, and the stage was three feet by three feet.
• 54:01
  Casi Joy: Oh no.
• 54:02
  Casi Joy: And I took You're trying to like pace for the stage.
• 54:04
  Chris Porter: I was like, so anyway, I just literally took a step off and took a step back on.
• 54:08
  Chris Porter: I was like, didn't know that was there.
• 54:09
  Casi Joy: Alright.
• 54:10
  Casi Joy: So what I meant was like crowd-wise.
• 54:14
  Chris Porter: Oh, sorry, though you meant actual size of the city.
• 54:16
  Chris Porter: Uh if the crowd's great, the bigger the better.
• 54:24
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 54:24
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 54:24
  Chris Porter: I you know, when you're opening for Bert, those shows are nuts.
• 54:28
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 54:28
  Chris Porter: Uh, especially when I got to do T-Mobile here, it was like just uh I don't even remember the set.
• 54:36
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 54:36
  Chris Porter: It was like one of those things.
• 54:38
  Casi Joy: Autopilot, taking it in, loving it.
• 54:39
  Chris Porter: Yeah, just like this is you know, and when you do 15 minutes, it's just long enough for you to like get your feet underneath you, and then you have that moment where you're like, oh fuck, I'm at the Boston Garden.
• 54:51
  Chris Porter: You know, yeah, and then finish out the set.
• 54:54
  Chris Porter: That is so cool.
• 54:55
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 54:56
  Chris Porter: And you know, Bert is just the nicest dude on the planet and and so great to work for.
• 55:03
  Chris Porter: When I did T-Mobile, we did the final cattle call with me and the other comics, and then he had my parents come up and took photos of the three of us in front of a sold-out T-Mobile crowd.
• 55:18
  Casi Joy: Oh my gosh.
• 55:18
  Casi Joy: Is that your guys' Christmas card?
• 55:21
  Chris Porter: Well, if Andy would have been there, we would have done it.
• 55:23
  Chris Porter: Andy.
• 55:24
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 55:25
  Chris Porter: Idiot.
• 55:26
  Casi Joy: Man.
• 55:26
  Casi Joy: Well, yeah, like uh the obviously the bigger the crowd.
• 55:29
  Casi Joy: But sometimes it's fun like to like work on a new set with like a smaller crowd where like you can hear.
• 55:36
  Casi Joy: I mean, this is different for musicians.
• 55:37
  Casi Joy: You probably don't want to hear a ton of calling out from the crowd, but like in a small crowd, sure.
• 55:42
  Casi Joy: I mean, you can really like find a couple people that like they're vibing.
• 55:46
  Casi Joy: I'm I'm zoning in on you for like the whole set.
• 55:48
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 55:48
  Casi Joy: And you just know that like they're gonna support you.
• 55:51
  Chris Porter: Well, I know when I play music, my eyes are closed 90% of the time.
• 55:55
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 55:56
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 55:56
  Chris Porter: Just because I'm not vibing with anybody.
• 55:59
  Casi Joy: And how often are you just closing your eyes for comedy?
• 56:02
  Chris Porter: Uh four percent.
• 56:04
  Casi Joy: Only the time on the shrooms.
• 56:05
  Casi Joy: I don't know.
• 56:06
  Casi Joy: Yeah, they don't know the walls are breezy.
• 56:08
  Chris Porter: You close your eyes playing music.
• 56:10
  Chris Porter: You close your eyes playing doing comedy, they're like, oh, he's he's on heroin.
• 56:13
  Chris Porter: Where'd he go?
• 56:14
  Chris Porter: You know, Mitch would kind of do that.
• 56:18
  Chris Porter: Mitch Hedberg would do that.
• 56:20
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 56:20
  Chris Porter: I mean, he was on heroin, but uh he also wore like rose-colored glasses and and was a different vibe.
• 56:27
  Casi Joy: Literally or figuratively?
• 56:28
  Chris Porter: Both.
• 56:29
  Chris Porter: Perfect.
• 56:29
  Chris Porter: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 56:30
  Chris Porter: Uh and yeah, but he would you he'd be up there just I watched Mitch Hedberg do an entire hour on his back.
• 56:40
  Casi Joy: Of the ground?
• 56:42
  Chris Porter: Yeah, like it was at the Stardome in in Birmingham, Alabama, and uh there was like a small riser at the back of the stage because it was like uh more of like a theater kind of situation.
• 56:52
  Chris Porter: And it was like a Friday late show, the audience was drunk and just yelling out bits to Mitch.
• 56:59
  Chris Porter: Just do the FedEx bit, do the bit.
• 57:02
  Chris Porter: And he got tired of it.
• 57:03
  Chris Porter: So he literally just laid down and had the mic like this, and they would yell out a bit, and he just did it.
• 57:08
  Chris Porter: He'd do it verbatim, and he did it for 45 minutes, and at the end of it, he said goodnight, did not get up, and the curtains closed.
• 57:18
  Casi Joy: That's kind of epic.
• 57:19
  Chris Porter: Yeah, it was it was an um I was like, that was the first time I've it was the only time I've ever seen someone kill laying on their back.
• 57:25
  Casi Joy: Laying down, doing the least amount of work possible.
• 57:28
  Casi Joy: Would you be able to like, you know, you've had so many specials out now.
• 57:33
  Casi Joy: If somebody like yelled out something from like three specials ago of like, do that one, would you be able to like I would try, but it it wouldn't go well.
• 57:41
  Chris Porter: Like everyone wants me to do the Taco Bell bit.
• 57:44
  Chris Porter: I don't I don't normally do it because I don't remember enough of it to do it justice.
• 57:49
  Chris Porter: Now, should I get on Spotify and listen to it and remember it?
• 57:52
  Chris Porter: Absolutely.
• 57:52
  Chris Porter: Um but I do rape nudge a lot.
• 57:57
  Chris Porter: Uh that's that's the big one I do at the end if I feel like it's an audience of of long timers.
• 58:04
  Chris Porter: Uh and it's just weird, and I'm sure it happens to you.
• 58:09
  Chris Porter: Uh it's just such a good feeling when you start a joke or start a song, and the audience is like, yes!
• 58:15
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 58:16
  Chris Porter: And it the first time it happened was right after Ugly and Angry.
• 58:20
  Chris Porter: I started the taco bell bit, and someone like was like, oh like that.
• 58:25
  Chris Porter: He's doing it.
• 58:27
  Chris Porter: And I almost started crying outside.
• 58:29
  Casi Joy: Oh like it was like someone singing your own lyrics.
• 58:31
  Casi Joy: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 58:32
  Casi Joy: It was just like, I'm it's working.
• 58:34
  Casi Joy: I'm making a difference.
• 58:36
  Casi Joy: Be funny because oh, that's so special.
• 58:39
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 58:40
  Casi Joy: We uh we had a show out of town like six months ago or something.
• 58:44
  Casi Joy: Where I like Joplin or something.
• 58:46
  Casi Joy: I don't know.
• 58:46
  Casi Joy: No, it was farther than that.
• 58:48
  Casi Joy: But there was one point where we were all eating dinner and someone said something, and my guitarist said like one of your bits, and it was the one I can't remember how it came up, but it was the one about how um Hunts is the Mr.
• 59:01
  Casi Joy: Pib of ketchup.
• 59:02
  Chris Porter: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 59:03
  Casi Joy: And we were all like, what?
• 59:05
  Casi Joy: And so we'd watched like half your special in our green room.
• 59:10
  Chris Porter: Yeah, my uncle, who's in my band and in the elders, his big thing is he'll when he's at restaurants and they have cheap ketchup, he'll take a photo of it and send it to me.
• 59:19
  Chris Porter: And some of the ketchups these people buy.
• 59:23
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 59:24
  Casi Joy: Which has helped me because I am one that I'll buy the like 97 cent one.
• 59:29
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 59:30
  Chris Porter: Because I didn't know.
• 59:31
  Chris Porter: Life's too short.
• 59:32
  Chris Porter: Now I know.
• 59:33
  Chris Porter: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 59:34
  Casi Joy: And that's really thank you.
• 59:36
  Chris Porter: You're welcome.
• 59:36
  Chris Porter: That's all that's all my comedy is, is just a PSA.
• 59:39
  Casi Joy: And teaching.
• 59:39
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 59:40
  Casi Joy: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 59:40
  Casi Joy: A lot of good lessons.
• 59:42
  Casi Joy: Well, Chris, this has been so fun.
• 59:44
  Casi Joy: I I know.
• 59:46
  Casi Joy: I've loved it so much.
• 59:47
  Casi Joy: Or should we keep going?
• 59:48
  Casi Joy: I don't know.
• 59:48
  Casi Joy: I feel like we're like at an hour.
• 59:49
  Casi Joy: Perfect! We're already at an hour.
• 59:51
  Casi Joy: Felt it.
• 59:51
  Chris Porter: Get the front door.
• 59:54
  Casi Joy: Well, thank you so much.
• 59:56
  Casi Joy: This has been so fun.
• 59:57
  Casi Joy: And yes, cheers.
• 59:59
  Chris Porter: Cheers to you.
• 1:00:01
  Casi Joy: Uh tell the people where they can find you.
• 1:00:03
  Chris Porter: Chris Porter Comedy.com.
• 1:00:04
  Chris Porter: Okay.
• 1:00:05
  Chris Porter: And I am Chris Porter on Instagram.
• 1:00:07
  Chris Porter: And I don't know what the other ones are, but search Chris Porter Comedy, it'll come up.
• 1:00:12
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 1:00:12
  Casi Joy: And find uh your tour dates and uh Chris PorterComedy.com.
• 1:00:15
  Casi Joy: Yeah.
• 1:00:16
  Casi Joy: And where can they stream?
• 1:00:17
  Casi Joy: He's got his new special out, Middle Rage on Amazon.
• 1:00:21
  Chris Porter: Uh it's all it's still for purchase and rent.
• 1:00:23
  Casi Joy: So only four dollars though for rent on Amazon.
• 1:00:27
  Chris Porter: That's a bottle of hinds.
• 1:00:29
  Casi Joy: I was like, I'm doing it.
• 1:00:30
  Chris Porter: Uh and uh and then it goes free in October.
• 1:00:34
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 1:00:34
  Casi Joy: So it'll be on Amazon Prime.
• 1:00:35
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 1:00:36
  Casi Joy: Just get it, rent it.
• 1:00:37
  Casi Joy: But also, times are tough.
• 1:00:38
  Chris Porter: So if you gotta wait, you gotta wait.
• 1:00:40
  Casi Joy: It's the ketchup or the Chris.
• 1:00:41
  Casi Joy: We don't know.
• 1:00:42
  Casi Joy: All right.
• 1:00:44
  Casi Joy: Well, thank y'all so much for tuning in to another episode of Custom Conversations.
• 1:00:49
  Casi Joy: Be sure to smash that like button.
• 1:00:51
  Casi Joy: I hate myself for saying that.
• 1:00:53
  Casi Joy: Um, follow us on all the social medias on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, all the play Twitter.
• 1:00:59
  Chris Porter: Twitter.
• 1:00:59
  Chris Porter: Well, I it's what everyone no one calls an ex.
• 1:01:03
  Casi Joy: No one's even going there anymore, are they?
• 1:01:05
  Casi Joy: No.
• 1:01:05
  Casi Joy: Okay.
• 1:01:06
  Chris Porter: Someone told me to post something on Twitter.
• 1:01:08
  Chris Porter: I was like, why?
• 1:01:09
  Casi Joy: Don't go there.
• 1:01:09
  Chris Porter: Yeah.
• 1:01:10
  Casi Joy: Follow us on MySpace.
• 1:01:11
  Casi Joy: Thank you so much.
• 1:01:12
  Casi Joy: Share this with your friends.
• 1:01:14
  Casi Joy: I'm Catholic.