Latest / The Whole Hearted Woman / Season 2, Episode 6: Maybe That’s Not Who You Are Anymore

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Season 2, Episode 6: Maybe That’s Not Who You Are Anymore · The Whole Hearted Woman

• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe that's not who you are anymore.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: Today we're going to talk about Mary Magdalene and the names we continue to carry.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: Have you ever said something about yourself so many times that you stop realizing you were saying it?
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: Things like, I've always been this way, I'm just an overthinker.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I'm terrible with confrontation.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm the one everybody depends on.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_00: I've never been confident.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: I'm too sensitive.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: I'm too clumsy.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not a leader.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: I like to hide behind the scenes.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_00: I always mess things up.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: I don't trust people.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not just good at saying no.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: That's just who I am.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes we say these things almost casually.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: But what if some of the things we've been calling our personality are actually patterns we've learned?
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: What if some of what we've been calling our identity was formed in response to something that happened to us?
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: And what if something that helped us survive one season has become the way we've learned to define ourselves in another?
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: And then here's the question I've been sitting with lately.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: What if that's not who you are anymore?
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_00: What if you're trying to walk into something new while continuing to answer to a name that belongs to an old season, or something that should just die?
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: Today I want to talk about a woman whose life had a history, a woman Jesus had delivered, a woman who followed him, a woman who stood in grief outside a tomb, and a woman who recognized the risen Jesus when he did something profoundly personal.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: He called her by name.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: Mary.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to the Wholehearted Woman Podcast.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Chris Reddy, and this is season two of the wholehearted life.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: Learning to live from a heart formed by Jesus.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: Throughout this season, we've been asking one question: How does a wholehearted woman live anyway?
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: And we're discovering that wholeheartedness isn't biving at some place where nothing inside of us.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: Everything is changing.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's learning to remain real Jesus forming us into a fear.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: We've done some meaningly.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: We know Jesus differently than we must.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: Life has changed.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe we've changed.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: And there's still a little description of ourselves, a little script that follows us around kind of a nagging.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes the hardest part of becoming isn't discovering something new about ourselves.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: It's releasing something old.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: And that always starts, and I'll say it over and over, change begins with awareness.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: When you're aware of it, you can change it.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: So before we go any further, I need to pray for today's message and for everyone listening.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: Father, thank you for the woman listening today.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: You know exactly where she is, what she's carrying, every part of her story.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: Holy Spirit, open her ears to hear what you want her to hear and open her heart to receive what you want to show her.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_00: Quiet every other voice and let her hear your voice clearly.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: And Jesus, where she has been living from an old name, an old wound, or an old understanding of who she is, meet her there with your truth and your love.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: Lead us gently today and continue forming our hearts to become more like yours.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: We give you all the glory and honor and thank you for what only you can do in and through us.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: In Jesus' name, amen.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not necessarily talking about literal names.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: I'm talking about the words we've attached to ourselves.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes they come from other people, like you're difficult, you're too much, you're not enough, you're too needy, you're weak, you're selfish, you're a troublemaker, you're a failure.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes nobody actually said those words, or maybe they did, but also life taught it.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've experienced rejection and then learned I'm unwanted.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: Or maybe someone left and your heart concluded, people leave me and I can't trust anyone.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you were praised primarily when you accomplished something and learned, oh wow, I'm valuable when I'm performed, so I'll keep doing that.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you grew up in chaos and became the responsible one, the perfectionist.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe everyone came to you with their problems and you became the strong one.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you experienced failure and quietly became the one who can't trust herself.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: And here's what makes this complicated.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: Some of those identities can look like strengths, right?
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: Being responsible is a strength, being helpful is a strength, being discerning can totally be a strength, and being independent can sometimes be necessary.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: But sometimes something can begin as a response to life and eventually become a description of who we believe we are.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: They're called labels.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: And once it becomes attached and or formed into our identity, we start protecting it.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: We start living from it.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's almost like it lives through us.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_00: We start making decisions from us, and sometimes without even realizing it, we just can't let go of it.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: And this is something I think happens to women more often than we recognize.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: Life changes, the children grow up, marriage changes, a career ends, a new opportunity comes, and God begins stirring something.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: You sense that there's another chapter, and suddenly the version of you that knew how to live the last season doesn't quite know what to do in this one.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've always been the caretaker, but nobody needs you in quite the same way anymore.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: Who are you now?
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've spent years supporting everyone else's dream, and suddenly you're asking, What do I want?
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've always been the dependable one, and now your heart is saying, I'm tired.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've always thought of yourself as someone who stays in the background, but something in you wants to speak, wants to create, lead, build, begin.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: And immediately an old voice says, Who do you think you are?
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: That's when identity becomes very practical because sometimes we think we're stuck because we don't know the next step.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: But underneath that may be something much deeper.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: The woman I believe myself to be doesn't know how to take that step.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: I want us to pay attention to that sentence.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: That's just who I am.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it's true there are things about our personalities and temperaments and gifts and preferences that are simply just a part of us.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_00: We don't need to turn every personality trait into a wound.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: But sometimes that's just who I am closes a door Jesus may be trying to open.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm just anxious, I'm just a people pleaser, oh I'm just controlling, oh, I'm just bad with boundaries, I'm just not confident, I'm just someone who needs everybody to be okay with me.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: What if instead of immediately declaring this is who I am, maybe we can start to become curious about why we think that.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: And we can ask ourselves, where did I learn this?
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: What has this protected me from?
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: What does this help me avoid?
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: What do I believe would happen if I responded differently?
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: And then, Jesus, is this actually who you are forming me to be?
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: That's a very different conversation.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_00: Mary Magdalene enters the gospel story as someone with a past.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: Luke 8 tells us that Jesus had delivered her from seven demons.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's what Scripture tells us.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to be careful here because over the centuries, Mary has sometimes been given a story the Bible doesn't actually give her.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: Scripture doesn't tell us that Mary Magdalene was a prostitute.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: It does not identify her as the unnamed sinful woman in Luke 7.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: We don't need to invent her story to make it dramatic.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: What Scripture gives us is already significant.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus had delivered her, and Mary followed him.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: She became one of the women who supported Jesus' ministry, and she was present around the crucifixion.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: And then John takes us to a garden, a tomb, and a grieving woman.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: In John chapter 20, Mary comes to the tomb and discovers the stone has been removed.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: Eventually, Peter and the other disciples come, they see the empty tomb also, and then they leave.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_00: But Mary stays.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: John tells us Mary stood outside the tomb crying.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_00: She looks inside, she encounters angels, and then she turns and sees Jesus.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: But she doesn't realize it's him.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_00: She thinks he's a gardener.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_00: And Jesus asks her, Woman, why are you crying?
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: Who is it you are looking for?
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_00: Mary thinks perhaps this man has moved Jesus' body, and then everything changes.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: Not because Jesus gives her a theological explanation, and not because he recounts her history, and not because he reminds her that he delivered her.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: He says, Mary.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: He says her name and then she knows him.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_00: There is something so intimate about that moment.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: Mary, not the woman who had seven demons, not the woman with the complicated history, not the woman who needed deliverance, not the grieving woman, not even the faithful woman who stayed, just Mary.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: Now I don't want to make the text say something John doesn't say.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: John isn't giving us a teaching here about psychological labels, but I do think this moment gives us a beautiful place to ask a question of our own hearts.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: What names have I continued answering to that Jesus isn't using when he calls me?
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: Because our story matters, our wounds matter, our failures matter.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: The things Jesus has brought us through matter.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: They become part of our testimony, but they don't have to become the totality of our identity.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: What Jesus brought you out of may explain part of your story, but it doesn't have to become the name you continue to answer to.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: And we see this beautiful thread throughout scripture.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: Think about Rahab.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: When we first met her in Joshua, her past is right there in the way she's introduced.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_00: But that isn't where her story ends.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: She puts her faith in God of Israel, becomes part of his people.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: And when we eventually open Matthew and read the genealogy of Jesus Christ, there's Rahab.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I love that.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: God didn't erase her story, he redeemed it.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: And the thing that once described part of her life did not get to determine what the rest of her life would become.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe that's something you need to hear today.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: Your past may explain part of your story, but it doesn't have the authority to define who you are becoming in Christ.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_00: And Rahab reminds us of it.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_00: Peter reminds us of it.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: And now standing outside the empty tomb, Mary reminds us of it too.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: Think about where we've already been this season.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: Peter failed terribly and Jesus knew it.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: Peter discovered something about himself he probably never wanted to discover.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_00: But Jesus didn't leave Peter in the man who denied me.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: He called him forward.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_00: He said, Follow me.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_00: And now Mary has a history of her own.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: But the risen Jesus isn't standing in the garden rehearsing her past, he calls her name.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: Peter teaches us, my failure isn't the final word.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: And Mary helps us consider my history isn't my name.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_00: And the wholehearted formation asks, Am I willing to let Jesus continue telling me who I am?
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: And this can be subtle.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_00: We may never actually say, my name is rejected, but we live like it.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: When something good happens to us, maybe we feel uncomfortable.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: Someone doesn't return a text and something inside us immediately says, see, people don't really want you.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: We may never call ourselves abandoned, but we panic when somebody pulls away.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: We may never call ourselves not enough, but we constantly compare.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: We constantly compare, perform, prove, and perfect.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_00: We may never call ourselves unworthy, but receiving something good makes us uncomfortable.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: We may never call ourselves invisible, but we become devastated when nobody notices what we've done.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: The wound may have happened years ago, but the identity it produced can keep interpreting today's life.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: And that's why healing isn't merely about understanding what happened.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: Eventually we have to ask the tough questions.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_00: What did I come to believe about myself because of what happened?
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_00: And am I still living from that belief?
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: When a woman tells me I know what I need to do, but I just can't seem to do it, I'm interested in this step.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm also curious about the woman who is trying to take it.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: What would taking that step require you to believe about yourself?
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_00: What would saying no mean?
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: What would speaking up mean?
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: What would starting the business mean?
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_00: What would leaving the familiar role mean?
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: What would asking for help mean?
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_00: What would being seen mean?
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: What would allowing someone to be disappointed in you mean?
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: Because sometimes we're trying to change a behavior while at the same time protecting the identity that created the behavior.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_00: And that's hard.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's deep down, I believe, my value comes from being needed.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_00: Then saying no isn't simply saying no.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: It feels like risking my value.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: If I believe keeping everyone happy keeps me safe, then setting a boundary doesn't simply feel uncomfortable.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: It can feel dangerous.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_00: If I believe I'm not the kind of woman who leads, then taking a visible step doesn't merely require courage.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: It challenges my understanding of the core of who I am.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: That's why I love slowing these things down with woman, not to analyze ourselves endlessly, but to uncover what we're actually asking ourselves to overcome.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: Because once we can see it and get to the root, we can bring that to Jesus.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to be very careful here too.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: This isn't about standing in front of the mirror every morning and saying, I'm amazing, I'm powerful, I'm successful, I'm enough.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_00: Christian identity isn't positive thinking with a Bible verse attached to it.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_00: Our identity is relational.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: Our identity is we belong to Jesus.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: We are loved by him.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_00: We are known by him.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: We are called by him.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: We are forgiven by him.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_00: We are being formed by him.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: And our identity isn't something we manufacture.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: It's something we increasingly learn to receive and live from in relationship with Christ.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: And that's important because even our new identity can become just another performance if we're not careful.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: I don't have to wake up tomorrow and perfectly behave like some new me.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: No, I'm learning, I'm becoming, I'm being formed.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes becoming looks like noticing.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, there she is again.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, there's the old caretaker, that knee-jerk reaction that wants you to just jump in and help.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's the old people pleaser rearing its head.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_00: The old perfectionist, the woman who thinks she has to prove herself, the woman who expects rejection.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_00: And instead of condemning her, we bring her to Jesus.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus, I'm doing it again.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: Show me what's happening here.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_00: What is true?
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: How would I respond if I actually live from what you say is true, Lord?
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: That's a formation.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: And this is important.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_00: You may begin understanding something new about yourself before it feels natural.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: You may know you're loved and still feel rejection.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_00: You may know you're safe with Jesus and still feel afraid.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: You may understand that your worth isn't based on performance and still feel uncomfortable resting.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: You may set a healthy boundary and still feel guilty afterward.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't necessarily mean the boundary was wrong.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes your emotions are simply catching up with something your heart is learning.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_00: New ways of living can feel unfamiliar, and unfamiliarity does not automatically mean we're wrong.
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes the old identity feels more comfortable because we've worn it longer.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_00: And here's what I love: Jesus calls her name and Mary recognizes him, and then he sends her.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_00: She goes to the disciples and says, I have seen the Lord.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_00: Do you see the movement?
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_00: Mary is grieving.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_00: Mary encounters Jesus.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus calls her by name.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: Mary recognizes him, and then Mary goes.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_00: Encounter leads somewhere, and that's important for us.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_00: Healing isn't meant to leave us sitting forever examining ourselves.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_00: Identity isn't merely something we understand.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_00: Eventually we live from it.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_00: We go, we speak, we respond differently, we take the step, we enter the next season.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: We become women who increasingly live from what Jesus has made true rather than continually organizing our lives around what used to be true.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: So let me ask you something today.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_00: Who have you been telling yourself you are?
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: Finish the sentence.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who and then pay attention to what comes next.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who overthinks everything.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who doesn't take risks.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who keeps everybody happy.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who stays behind the scenes.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who can't trust.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who has to be strong.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just the kind of woman who, and now stop and ask, is that actually who I am?
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_00: Or is that who I learned to be?
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_00: Is it temperament?
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_00: Is it wisdom?
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_00: Is it a gift?
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_00: Is it a pattern?
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_00: Is it protection?
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_00: Is it an old wound talking?
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: Is it an expectation someone placed on me?
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_00: Is it a role I have outgrown?
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: And more importantly, Jesus, what do you say here?
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_00: Because maybe the next step isn't first becoming more disciplined.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe it isn't even trying harder or finding another strategy.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_00: Or maybe it's something deeper that needs to shift.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe that's not who you are anymore.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: So let's sit here for a minute.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_00: Think about the season you're in right now.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_00: Where do you sense change?
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: Where do you sense invitation?
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_00: Where do you know something old isn't working anymore?
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_00: And what description of yourself keeps showing up there?
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_00: When you imagine taking the next step, what does the voice inside you say?
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_00: Who do you think you are?
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: You can't do that.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: You've never been good at that.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_00: People like you don't do things like that.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're too old.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's too late.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_00: You'll embarrass yourself.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_00: You'll disappoint someone.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_00: But don't fight it for a moment.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_00: Just notice it.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_00: Because sometimes the voice that keeps us stuck reveals the identity we've been protecting.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_00: And then what we do is bring it into relationship.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus, is that what you have called me?
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: This week I want you to notice one sentence you repeatedly say about yourself.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: Just one.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_00: Write it down.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_00: I am, or I'm just someone who, or I've always been, and then don't immediately replace it with something prettier.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: Just get curious first.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_00: Ask, where did I learn this?
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: How has this identity shaped the way I live?
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_00: What has it protected me from?
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_00: What has it cost me?
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_00: And then sit with Jesus and ask, Jesus, what name have I been answering to that you are no longer calling me?
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: And then who are you teaching me to become?
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: Then listen.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_00: Don't manufacture an answer, don't force a spiritual experience.
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_00: Just stay with him.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_00: Because the goal isn't to come up with a better label, the goal is relationship to the one who knows you, the one who created you, the one who is forming you, and to increasingly recognize his voice when he calls your name.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're listening and thinking, I know there's a next step in front of me, but something keeps stopping me.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_00: This is the kind of work I love doing with women because sometimes we don't need another person telling us what we should do.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_00: We already know that.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_00: What we need is space to uncover why doing it feels so difficult.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: We uncover what belief is underneath the hesitation, what pattern may be repeating itself, what old identity are we still protecting?
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: What might Jesus be inviting us to see differently?
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: That's the work of the heart.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_00: And as part of what I do with women, helping them slow down, uncover what's keeping them stuck, and begin moving forward with greater freedom, clarity, and wholeness.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: So I'd like to end in prayer.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus, thank you that you know us completely, not merely who we have been, not merely what happened to us, not merely our failures and messes or our wounds or patterns or roles.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_00: No, you know us.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_00: And there are places in our hearts where we've been answering to names you never gave us.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_00: Names like rejected, not enough, too much, failure, invisible, unwanted, responsible for everyone, the strong one, the busy one, the one who can't change.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus, bring those places into your light.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_00: Show us where an old identity is still shaping a present decision.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: Show us where we've confused a coping pattern with our personality.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_00: Show us where something that once protected us is now preventing us from moving forward fully into the fullness of what you have for us.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: And help us not shame the woman we have become to survive difficult seasons.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_00: Meet her with compassion like you always do, and then lead her forward.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: Teach us who you are because we belong to you.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: Teach us to recognize your voice, the gentle voice.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: And when you call us by our name, give us grace to turn toward you.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_00: And when you tell us to go, give us the courage to take the next step.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: We don't want to manufacture a new identity.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_00: We want to live from the truth of being known, loved, redeemed, and formed by you.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_00: You didn't create puppets.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: In Jesus' name.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: Amen.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_00: Mary came to the tomb looking for the Jesus she thought she had lost.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_00: She stood outside weeping.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_00: She saw him, but she didn't recognize him until he said, Mary, and maybe there's something for us there, because there will be seasons when life changes, when old roles don't fit, when doors close, when familiar ways of living stop working, when Jesus begins inviting us forward and pushing us along, and an old voice may immediately tell us who we've always been.
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_00: But perhaps before we answer that, we can stop, listen, and ask, is that still the name I'm being called?
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_00: Your past is part of your story.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: Your wounds are part of your story.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_00: Your failures may be part of your story, but they don't get to write the final destination of who you are.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus knows the whole story, and he still calls you by name.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe that's not who you are anymore.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're becoming you are seen, you are deeply loved, and the shepherd is still speaking.