Latest / To Your Success! Podcast / Episode 46: The Effortless Way: Why Forcing It Never Works
Transcript
- Christer Johnsen: Hello everyone and warm welcome to the To Your Success podcast. I am Christer Johnsen and with me as always, Elin Solheim. Happy to be here. It's wonderful to be here. We are out sailing. You can see that we record, at least if you at this at watch this at YouTube, ⁓ will see that we are in our boat. We are actually stuck. ⁓ It's a good feeling to be stuck actually. Yeah, physically we are stuck but not in terms of our goals. We are waiting out a storm. We are in Croatia and it's called a Bura. Bura I think it's called other places in the world. Borat? Not Borat, no. They are... Sorry! Okay. I got some strange pictures in my mind now. Okay, but we are... So we are in Croatia and we are stuck with weather. We are anchored in a small wonderful village. Very nice people here. I cannot pronounce what it is, but you are just south of Split. And today's subject is I have no idea. It's a surprise for you actually. That is a surprise for me. So because Elin wanted us to change because she thinks that we needed to upgrade our podcast and be more personal. And so it's all up to you now. Yeah. The reason for it is that I think that think people should know the real you and the real me. Yeah. ⁓ ⁓ get that, we have to talk about something else than just the mentoring business. OK. And I just wanted to ask you some questions. And I haven't planned this. personal questions? It depends on how personal it should be, but I don't think so. Not too personal. ⁓ OK. I'm open for that. OK. ⁓ So the reason is more like I know you and you are a funny warm-hearted person that wants to help other people all over the world and and ⁓ that sometimes I think we just get too serious and just Lighten up a little bit and ⁓ explain what we are doing. So just we can start. How was your day today? What did you do today? ⁓ today I I woke up before you. I went to bed early last night because ⁓ I just was tired. And maybe it's the weather. I don't know. But then I woke up earlier. I woke up like 5.45 this morning. I made a coffee for you. Coffee for me because we start every day with a coffee in bed. And that's really important for you. And since it's important for you, it's important for me. Thank you. And then, well yesterday we made the decision that we should stay here for a couple of more days. Even though there was a window this morning that we could leave, but the other places to go to are not so good protected. We went for a morning walk, ⁓ Even though it was raining, ⁓ do that every morning. We are ashore ⁓ there is a harbor. ⁓ go for a morning walk, like one hour morning walk. We talk about things. ⁓ had a one-on-one client. Call at 915. Yeah, ⁓ I had a call ⁓ had a call sales call. Yeah ⁓ we did that when we were out walking ⁓ ⁓ that, have made some reels I had three one-on-one calls with diamond league clients, ⁓ are really fun to work with Yeah, I and then we had ⁓ cake since you make cake ⁓ finally this little ⁓ gas oven in the boat. I made a cake. Has that been a goal for you to make a cake? Yes it has actually. You know what my goal has been? To eat the cake. Now that you should stop complaining about the oven. So we are both high goal achievers now. Really we achieved that right. It's a kind of a small oven and it's gas oven so it's kind of tricky to cook in. It's kind of tricky but I'll manage. It's better for heating than cooking actually. It's true, but you are able to make lasagna, wonderful lasagna in that oven, so you have actually good progress. let's continue with my day. After lunch, after the cake, I made four reels, ⁓ videos about new subjects. Sometimes I use AI, sometimes I just get inspired to what to talk about. What did I do? ⁓ We a workshop coming up. on Tuesday next week we have about 150 people saying that they want to attend that workshop. So far. Our goal is 500. Yeah. It will be 500. It will be 500. And then so we have a WhatsApp group that we invite people to. So I made a live video there just saying that I'm really grateful that they are there and if they want that they are there and if they want to upgrade they can buy a VIP ticket which is a really high value VIP ticket. It's only 17 euros. You get a lot of value. get a clarity call with you, ⁓ get ⁓ live coaching call with me one hour. ⁓ get the To Your success program, which we normally sell for 790, that is only for 17 euros in total. Just a call with me alone worth 17 euros, isn't Yes, and with me maybe 18 euros. That is not how we price. No, no it's not. So basically that is how it is. Then I had a chat with the harbor master here and he's going tomorrow to get one of our gas bottles filled up that is important for us right now. And that is maybe what we do. You we managed to run the boat. ⁓ mean, and it's a big challenge ⁓ me still. It is a big challenge. We master it more and more and more. ⁓ know, we master our mentoring business and it's so much easier when we are at home ⁓ from ⁓ office and do everything. ⁓ then ⁓ And then sailing, only sailing, we are really good at that. mean anchoring is so fun, navigation is, it's like, yeah, it's effortless, right? Yes, it is. To combine it. Is that, you know, well, we had a leak on the generator, we have a generator producing power for us, and then there was a leak on that, and then I had to fix that because I fixed everything on the boat. We need new gas, we need to fill diesel. Last week we had to find a place that had diesel because Europe is actually running out of diesel. And therefore we have decided to have extra diesel on board. So we have to manage all these things. And we don't choose a simple life, easy life. No, but easy life is not fun. So it should be effortless, but it should be a lot of things to do for us. What do we do to make it effortless? We practice, we practice, we practice, we practice. And that is... And I was wrong about that. I can say that. When I first started to change, really, because I was so used to working hard, and I got allergic to working hard. I still work hard, but now I work with things I really like. my paradigm was working hard. Like the way to success, the way to make a lot of money is working hard. I mean, I worked so hard I ended up in hospital, almost died. I made a lot of money. So what we do now is that we practice a different way. It's like when we anchored the last two days ago, we anchored up here and then you say it's so easy to anchor now. It is. We remember when it was difficult. We've done it a thousand times now. but that is what we do. That is why we just continue, continue, continue. And what we always do when we are anchored, when we are finished, it's high five. High five. And it's an anchor drum. What you call it? Anchor schnapps. And yesterday we anchored... Yesterday we anchored one place and then we had to move the boat. So it was a new shot. Yeah. That was in the morning. That was in the morning and we had to move the boat once more and then it was another. Because we always have to every time. It's Jägermeister shot. It's a Jägermeister shot. It's not like a... And that's almost worse than running out of diesel is to run out of Jägermeister. Yeah, it will Sounds like we are drinkers but we are not. It's like we have this small... actually don't like Jägermeister. don't like it. But I do it. It's fun. Okay. Sometimes we have Limoncella. Yeah. That's better but we are not in Italy now. No, so no we cannot. No. Okay. So the point is that you know by we challenge ourselves all the time, know and we are close as well all the time and That that takes mental strength to be this close because we live on this 13 times for 13 and a half times four meters And most of the time we sit this close like we do now. Yeah, and then we have a dinghy. That's the escape route It's a close life Right, so and that has taken practice too because that wasn't effortless at the beginning either. But it's the same thing with everything. It's like when you want to change, you have to change. You have to make the decision and don't I expected it to be effortless ⁓ the beginning, ⁓ effortless comes through practicing. ⁓ like when you started selling, you were really shitty at selling. Yeah. ⁓ with me. I was terrible. I was afraid of selling. ⁓ we're really good. I was scared to say to tell people the price. Yeah. ⁓ You were selling them short. Yeah. Yeah. That's not a good thing. But actually I was just asking about your day and that's the kind of person you are. When I ask you about your your mind just keep on talking about all the things that why we do things and everything. And that's the point of the mentoring that you do because you are personal the way you think is personal. So when you take something like a thing that's sailing and working and you just mix it together and you put this in a theory. Like we have to practice. When we met, I remember when we met, that's like 150 years ago. No, it's not 150 years ago. I'm only 29. I know. Well, to be that... old you look really good, not to be that young. Thank you. welcome. I look my age, it's good. Yeah it is. ⁓ You said that and you observed me right because you are an observer and you said that you pick all these different things and then you conclude it down and you say why don't we do that. Everybody else is thinking about one thing but you take all the things and just... I think about all the things at the same time I guess I guess that is one of my strengths as leader of companies as well and when I was in the corporate world was that I was able to go up on the helicopter perspective and see the big picture picking the information I need and then drill down I mean I could easily discuss the flow of plastic material in a tool for how we made plastic parts with an engineer and they looked at me and said you are not an engineer I said no I have a master in economy and business and said why do you discuss this because it's fun It's into the spirit of it. So I have that ability. I've always been this curious guy. I drove my parents crazy with all my questions. imagine that. That's a good thing then. And I still wonder, you know, I wonder about life. I wonder why do we do this? Yeah, like when we had to go in here because we anchored out there, like a few hundred meters out there. And then we woke up yesterday that it was shitty, shitty weather. And I thought it was a protected bay from the storm, but it was not. And then we came in here. I was not angry about that. I was just wondering, why did we end up here? What is the purpose of us going here? I think it was the amount of Jegermeister that was the reason that... think so. I think it was the harbour master said that we can get to cooking gas so you can make more cakes. But the point is that we enjoy it. And when I ask about your day, you... talk about the things we do. And one of the things that we shouldn't do today that we are doing now was making this podcast. So to be this kind of like, we just have to make a podcast. It's a good day for making a podcast. We just have to do it. It's open space in the calendar. And the reason why it was open... it's still daylight outside, so we need to make it now. And the reason why there is an open spot in our calendar, at least in my calendar, was because I did something you planned me to do today. I did that yesterday. I made a program tomorrow. I have a live program in the Shortcut to Freedom. And I prepared that yesterday instead of today. Because I asked you to do it yesterday. Because we might have to leave the harbor today because of the weather. Because we never know the weather. We never know, we just have to adapt. And then we ended up making this. And the plan was not to have this session like this, where I didn't know what to talk about because I like to have control. But you managed well. Thank you. I think I do. I think that is how I am as a mentor as well. have a very, very wide, based on my experience and my background, I I started working with brand building in one of the largest food companies. I worked with brands like Maggi, like Findus, Butoni. for Nestle, right? And so I learned marketing there, then I was marketing director in a DIY chain, so I learned even more about campaigning there. Then when I was 29, I became a CEO, so I learned management and leadership. For me, it's a huge difference between management and leadership. We actually have a program coming up about this. yeah. So that will be fun. That will be fun, and we are looking for five. people only on a high level in the corporate world that want to transition from being a manager because manager is to be administrative. is actually it's it has nothing to do with with creation right and leadership is creating it is to move forward. So I mean with my clients as well I guess I just pick these different things. We have one of the clients I talked to today he has a his business is several hundred million Kroner turnover he want to grow that to two billion. So and I've done that so I can relate to that. Another client is 27 years old. He wants to do the same thing as us. And I help him with everything there. The fun thing is that everything is mindset. It's not skill set. Most people think it's skill set, right? Because it is like, okay, so I have the skill set of learning all the mechanical things, right? My dad had the same skill set, right? He knew how the engine, he had a sailboat, I grew up sailing. Mom and dad. And dad didn't dare to fix the engine when there was a leak, right? Or the toilet or whatever it is, because a boat always breaks, right? There is always something that breaks. he believe that he can do it? No, he was afraid of doing it. Right. And then it was the easy solution. I just called Christian and then he comes and fix it. Right. He put some tape on and then I fix it. Right. And then I fix it because I have the attitude since I was a kid that I just want to understand how it works. I've a lot of mistakes there, but now I know how to fix it. I just have the attitude that I can fix it. That is a mindset. That's a cool part because if you go and check my Instagram account, then you will find you fixing things. That's fun. Yeah. And installing. And you know, projects, one hour boat project is four hours on the clock. Yeah. Yeah. If it's only a small thing, maybe three hours. Yeah. And then it's always like I have to open everything because the engine is below. here and everything is here. So I just have to pick one spot in the boat that I can stay for at least four hours without moving. if it's nice weather. Yeah, or if the weather is bad I can stay in the kitchen for four hours. okay. Still then there will be food when you are finished working. That's true. So but boat life is interesting, right? Because I like to fix things. I like to make things work and the boat is there is always a new thing coming up. Making it better and better and better, right? I don't know if you are in the sailing world, you have heard about Hallbergrassi. I grew up with Hallbergrassi's beautiful, beautiful boats. My parents had the 26 and the 29 and then the 31. This boat is built on a yard ⁓ just in the same area, right? So it's the same thing. But Magnus Rassi, who is now the owner and the founder, he's the son of the founder. He said that every time a boat is 100 % perfect, nothing wrong, you mark a cross in the ceiling. There are no crosses in the ceiling of boats. There's always something, right? But you just have to live with that. And that's the part, because it's a complicated product. This is a floating home. I think it's actually a symbol of life. How? There are always something you can do better. There's always something you can do better. That's true. And you can always, and that's the purpose of life as well. Abraham Hicks said that, you know, we fire all these rockets of desire and the purpose of life is its livingness. I write that in my book. And people don't understand that. I often go back to the friend, a friend of our, ⁓ of a couple that is close to us. And she said that from now, that was like six, seven years ago, we were at a party and she sat there and we had a glass of wine and she was smoking. We don't smoke. ⁓ And then she said from now on I'm gonna do as little as possible for as much as possible and six months later She had a brain stroke. She and that's six seven years ago. She's still reduced, right? That could be just by accident but be very very careful with stop living and just waiting Because the purpose of life is is living as the purpose of life is to solve problems It is to reach goals and it's so fun to reach goals. Sometimes it's really frustrating as well. Mm-hmm One of the things that we practice now is just to be neutral We didn't sell, he said no. Be neutral. The weather is shitty. Be neutral. One of the reasons why it was a big decision yesterday to say that we're gonna stay here. Because you have agreed with another couple that live the same way like us. Well they did it differently. They sold everything, American couple. They're on Instagram. I don't follow their account. Our freedom project is the name. ⁓ It's a very nice couple. Traveling least on Instagram. Yeah, but I contacted them and maybe they will be guests on this podcast. Yes, because we are not so far from Montenegro. During Easter in Montenegro, we get some friends of ours on board and they are in Montenegro now, not our friends, but that couple. And we would like just to meet them because they you get inspired by them, right? They sold everything and they live one month in each country and they travel the world like that. And we have been like almost at the same place when they were in Italy we were going home and it's like now they are in Montenegro we are in Croatia. They are going to Albania when we are leaving Albania I think. are going there. Yeah. So and then we have to be at Corfu at the beginning of at the end of April. So maybe but the reason why is that we we wanted to stay here but the challenge was that I I've talked to them and I want to meet them in Montenegro just to say hi because they are like-minded people. They travel the world and they do a business out of it and they do everything. But they are leaving on the 27th so then we have to hurry up. If you just fix the weather then we can leave today. Maybe you can manifest that. I heard a story about Bob Proctor trying to manifest a cloud away. He never figured it out. He claimed he did it. I don't know. But I don't have the manifestation power over weather. Luckily. I don't want to be in charge of the weather because the weather systems are so good. Because it keeps the air and the earth sound. There is a reason why. But okay. So and... Going back to that, what we talk about is actually what we call subjective control. It is not to let the circumstances control how you feel. Be neutral. The power of being neutral. Calm. I remember now when we talk about this that the serenity chapter of... ⁓ that book called again? ⁓ little... ⁓ Brown one I give to some of my clients. As a man thinketh James Allen, 1907, he wrote, I highly recommend everyone to read that. It's a beautiful book. It's really small. And he said, as a man thinketh in his heart, so he is. He has chapter seven in that book is about serenity. And he says, nothing attracts success like a calm mind. You know, be the tree that gives shadow to others. Be the source and that is neutral and positive. And then I can say that like two, three years ago, I would have been angry inside for us being stuck here because I wanted to fulfill your wish of coming to Montenegro the 27th. I still touch on that. Right. I still can still be better. Because I want to go there too and it's not so far. I mean, it's from here. It's like 100 nautical miles. Yeah, but we are stuck now, but we can travel on Friday. It's two days from now and we will still make it if we want to. Why feel stuck? I don't know. I agree. But that's just an example from our some cake. There is a storm coming. Let's have a cup of tea. That's the British. That is because we're supposed to think and not only react. But then subjective control is really important. What is subjective control? It is not to let the five physical senses control how you feel. It is to understand the mind, that you have three parts of the mind, the conscious mind, ⁓ which is where everything is taught, right? The conscious mind is where all your knowledge is. ⁓ And it's linked to the five physical senses, see, taste, touch and smell. And then you have the analytical mind. You have this one second before when you see something until you react, you can act or react on it. And then you have the subconscious emotional mind that is linked to the higher faculties, like your will. ⁓ actually, gave ⁓ the young the young client we have today, I gave him a job to work on his will. So I made an agreement with him that he should work on that for 30 days. And fulfilling everything, completing everything. He's a really good starter, but it's not a good finisher. It's a cool challenge. You can use your will, right? That is your discipline. You have your imagination, you have your memory, you have your intuition, all this reasoning, your ability to think. But when you let what happens around you control you, you lose the power of creating your life. Then your life is the cause. No, your life is the effect of everything that happens around you. When you use the subconscious and the analytical mind correctly and you don't let defy physical senses, control you, then you are in subjective control. That means that you create your life. And that is maybe the biggest challenge. Don't let your results control you. Don't let your bank account control your decisions. You have a paradigm there. Yeah, you too. We both have. Yeah, maybe. I'm really good at ignoring it. Yeah. We're always getting better. We're always getting better. So. Yeah, so to sum up, then, I mean, the reason why you wanted to have this was to share who we truly are, that we are that we are. I mean, we have different roles and now we have seen more of the personal us. Right. I think actually we are what we teach. We live it every day. Yes. ⁓ So when I ask you a question, how was your day? What did you do today? It just naturally end up in being you telling about the mind and the higher faculties and everything. because we live this, we do this every day. So this is a part of us. That's the bonus of being in a mentor program with you. Because this is it. This is what they get. They get you. On you. Yeah, of course. Yeah, and you had a call with one of our clients now. She's in the shortcut to freedom and she's practicing being a sales professional. She's a nurse and photographer and now she's practicing being a sales professional and she completely failed. No, she didn't fail. She only learns. I know, but she failed. mean, that's okay. She learned a lot. that's fine, you know, we have tried more times than most people have failed. We do a lot of mistakes. I love that we learn. Yeah, we learn every day. And then you picked up the phone and called her. Of course, because we do that. It's personal. And it's Definitely. So this was a completely different episode. Should we wrap it up? Did you feel comfortable? be an ask question and not being in control of the conversation? I'm fine with that, you know that. Yeah, I know. And I want to go back to the five things highly successful people do, right? To wrap this up. To give some value. Number one, set high goals. And don't be afraid of setting high goals, right? When I started setting a goal, it is something you practice and you don't have to know exactly what to do. I often say to people, write down your dream life. And they say, but that's so big. said, so what? To the universe, there is no small or big to you. It's only your perception that makes it big. set high goals, make fast decisions. And when you have to think about it, it's not a decision. That's your paradigm. That's your old you running you. And you just have to think about it because you're afraid of doing mistakes, which is the biggest mistake you can do. Yeah, definitely. Yes. And then listen only to people that... go back to decisions, then make fast decisions, meaning that you make a decision based on two things. Will this take me closer to my goal? Yes or no? Will this grow me? Will I become a better version of me? Then only listen to people that have done what you truly want to do. And that is maybe why you wanted to have this conversation as well, this episode, because we live this every day. Yes, we do. Yeah, we get bruises. We know how it is, right? And then people say, I wish I could do the same thing. And I say, do it then. Of course. Do it. Just do it. And then they say, I don't know how, but I can teach you how, right? And the how is different than you think. Is it easy all the time? No. Is it fun? Yes. Because we do what we love. Yes. Yeah. And it's actually different than we thought. We can say that. I thought it would be completely different. But this is like we come to a new place and we still have the how, have the how with us. I realized that first time we sailed to London and sailing to London is really cool because we sailed all the way up the Thames. and we stay downtown London next to Tower Bridge and it's like I lived for two months downtown London in my house in my boat which is my home. Right? It's cool. Yeah. And now the house is blown. Now. Almost taken by the wind here. Yeah. Luckily we have a good captain that has secured the boat. Yeah. ⁓ it's you. Okay. So the five things are highly successful. Only take advice from people that have done what you truly want to do. If you want to sail around the world, don't talk to people that don't have done that. If you want to have success and freedom, ask people that have done that. That is why we practice this every day, because we love it. And then start investing in yourself and make the that I want to change. You don't have to have clearly defined goals. don't have to, because we will help you. have clearly defined goals, that's a part of the process. Make decision, I want to change. Right? And when you make the decision, and the decision is a committed decision, meaning that you stand for it, you don't change it. ⁓ You most people, make slow decisions and change fast. ⁓ We fast decisions and we don't change. ⁓ It's persistence. It's about being honest. This I will do. And when you make those five things, then your life will change. ⁓ And live it every day. We do. And it's Yeah, it's not effortless. It will never be because we always upgrade. We do. Isn't that it? Sometimes I wonder if we want to hurt ourselves by upgrading every time, by challenging it would be. But it's just fun, right? I don't want to go back. I'd rather die than go back. You remember that story? Yeah, but we have told that before. Yeah, we can take that another time. Yeah. All right. Should we wrap it up? We have already done that. OK. So as always, everything we do is to your success. Have a wonderful day. Bye.