Latest / The Padded Cell Podcast / EPISODE 148 - 'Sir Huge Beaver'

Transcript

EPISODE 148 - 'Sir Huge Beaver' · The Padded Cell Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: This could go really badly wrong.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_01: That's it, no sex for you.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_03: That means no sex for you, so that's if that's gonna happen.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_04: It's like it's like me beating a sub and they're not enjoying it.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_04: What is the fucking point?
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_03: What's the point?
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_04: I'm gonna let everybody hear me letting you sweat.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you, thank you.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_03: Oh you store that fuck.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_04: Well, that's what some mummies look like, Jeremy's.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_03: That's a bit violet.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_04: Sorry, folks.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_01: Most people like the heavy, footy.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: Not many people like the stingy.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_04: I would want a penis that I can't quite get me under.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_01: You've got one of them.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_01: It's mine.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_04: You're complicating things, stop.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_04: I can do this because Jim's a I wouldn't do that to one of the house.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_04: I've let them ramble on, they'll just cut it out.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_04: Oh Jim.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_04: You need to be on camera.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_01: Just as well.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_04: Are you a deviant?
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_04: You know, like those of us who binge watch serial killer programmes, laugh at the stupid stuff people do, and revel in anything adult?
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_04: Well, you found your people, jumping onbulls, as we crack open the door to the Panther Cell and release the insanely stupid, the weirdly wonderful, and those who choose to live as a summary numbers.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_04: We develop into the strange, the macabre, the sexy and the outrageous! So, if you're a deviant, then you have your place with us in the Panther Cell.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_04: This episode is powered by our Patreons.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_04: Thank you so much, one and all, for all of your support.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_04: It means the world.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_04: And welcome to my new Patreon, Catherine.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_04: And I'd also like to take the opportunity to say uh hello to Natalie, who I met in a car park, and Annette, who is out for a little walk.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_04: Lovely to meet you both.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_04: Hello and welcome to episode 148 of the Panther Cell Podcast.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_04: And today I'm here with my other half or Jim.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_04: Hi guys, hope you're well.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, how nice of you asking after their wellness.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, gotta keep them all keen, haven't we?
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_04: I don't think I ever ask if they're all right.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_04: I say thank you at the end.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's fuzzy.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_04: So we've got our gym because we're on audio.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and we're giving our other hosts a couple of weeks' holiday because summer holidays and all that kind of thing.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_04: Um and obviously we are pre-recording a little bit.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_04: So they're they're off from the pad itself at the moment.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_04: And uh it's me and thee stepping in, audio only.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_04: I did consider video, and I think if I said video, she would have gone nope.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_04: Yep.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_04: I thought you meant yep, I would have gone on video.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_01: No, yeah.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so uh so with audio because Jim's a chick and shit and won't go on the camera, basically.
• 2:35
  SPEAKER_01: Well you know, okay.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_01: FBI's out there, mate, aren't they?
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_01: So you've got to be careful.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_04: FBI people that might might be on the lookout for you.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, telling you.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_04: Because your own Facebook page doesn't out yet enough.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_04: I know.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_04: So just so you all know, so episode 148, 149 are gonna be audio with me and Jim.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_04: And then we're back on video then uh for episode 150.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and we're gonna be heading into our three-year anniversary when we go back on film.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know exactly what I'm gonna do.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_04: I've got some plans, but they're in my head.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_04: I need to get them on paper because they're in my head with all the other stuff.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, and I keep forgetting because they're getting buried under all the other shit that's um weighing on my brain right now.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you will get there.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_04: Oh no, we know we will, yeah.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_04: Um, so uh so yeah, I don't know exactly what I'm gonna do, but it's three years.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_04: Madness, madness.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, we're not gonna whistle loads because I've got loads that want to do today.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, lovely.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_04: I was actually gonna do this with Barry if we were filming, but it doesn't really matter because it's appropriate to anybody.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_04: Good, anybody and everybody.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_04: So before we like launch into our On This Days, uh one of our previous episodes, I can't remember which one it was now.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_04: I think it was one with Barry actually.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_04: We talked about macro genitalism.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: Right, yeah.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_04: It was Barry, and he was like, if it's something to do with pictures and camera macro, and I'm like, Oh for fuck's sake, no, it's a fetish factoid in not bad.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, why is it gonna be about that?
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_04: Um, anyway, so just to remind you all, if you haven't if you haven't seen, heard it, yes.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_04: Um, macro genitalism is large genitals, male, female, whoever.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_04: Uh so we talked about it a little bit, and I said to people out there, if you know somebody or if you yourself have a large penis, let me know what like you know the ups and downs are.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_04: Ups and downs, oh my god.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_04: I've up the ins and outs, ups and downs, ins and outs of having a large dick.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, um I had some responses, and I mean some were a bit filthy, but you know, tongue in cheek.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_04: Tongue in cheek.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and yeah, some of them were quite useful.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_04: It was just more about um clothing.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_04: So even when it's flaccid, it gets in the way.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_04: And some guy had really, really big balls, and he didn't have like a syndrome or nothing, he just had big balls.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_04: And so we have to wear like baggy pants, you know, like a baggy crutch.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, big bad bobby big balls, yeah.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_04: Him as well, yeah.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_04: So there's those bus.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_04: Um there's some one of our Patreons, um, Rosen, I'm not gonna say who it was, and she knows somebody who has a very, very, very large penis, like huge.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_04: And I was gonna say it's like a crutch.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_04: Um you need to talk on crutch.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: Like a shillely.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_04: Shall you?
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_04: I really want a shillely.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_04: The same phrase for a shilly.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_04: I know I'll buy you one, but we're gonna I know, yeah.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_04: So no one wants to make me a shillely, that'd be lovely, thank you.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, so um anyway, this guy, when he's erect, because it's so big and the blood rushes to that area, he passes out.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_01: That's unfortunate for when you're having sex.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_04: But even having a wank.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: I know, yeah.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: You could you finish?
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_04: Well, that's the thing, because you go harder and harder, don't you, before you splooge.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_04: So you know, is he gonna pass out before he comes?
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god, that poor guy.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_04: I didn't have to think of the splooge at the end, you know, just thought of him passing out.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_01: Obviously, from a guy point of view, you know what I mean?
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_04: Because he could like just stroke it gently so it doesn't get like hard, hard because he's like edging himself for ages and then wank hard to sploogge, but then all the blood's gonna suddenly rush to his cock before he's sploged it, he's gonna pass out before he oh god.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_01: Imagine that one though, we're waking up and you haven't finished stars again.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh being all day wanking.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_04: But I wonder also, obviously, guys have more and glory.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_04: I wonder how that works.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_04: So I wonder if he gets more and glory or his body is like, no, we're not gonna do that to you.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_04: We we know that you're not gonna pass out.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_01: And he can't do handstands either.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_04: Pass everywhere.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_01: Um slap himself in the face.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, he'd be the suck his own dick, but he but he'd pass out before the finish.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, there's so many downsides to this.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, seems to be.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_04: So I've said before, and there's gonna be caveats to my large large penis for a day.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_04: It's not gonna be so large, it makes me pass out.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_04: It's not gonna be so large that I can't satisfy somebody or whoever.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_04: It's yeah, I just want just a slightly above average penis.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_04: One that I can't slightly get my hand around.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_04: There you go, it's a good gauge.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, okay.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_04: Because I don't really know what's the comforted one.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_04: So something that I can't quite get my hand around.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_04: I've talked about me and it's penises a lot.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_01: So you've only got little hands though.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_04: Well, they're not that little.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_04: Well, no, not not what you're gonna say.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_04: Don't say it.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_01: Don't say it, you know.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna say it.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna say it.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_04: I'll let you all fill in the blanks there, but anyway.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_01: Blankety blank.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_04: So I would want a penis that I can't quite get my hand around.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_01: You've got one of them.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_01: It's mine.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_04: See, I was letting everybody fill in the blanks there.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_04: You just filled it in for them.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, there you go.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, anyway, I'm gonna move on.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_04: On this day.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_04: We've got two on this day's today.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_04: And um the first one I really, really like I like both of them.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_04: But the first one we both have done at some point.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_04: I know I know it's quite a lot.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_04: It's not filthy.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, okay.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_04: It's something that even children do.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_04: So there you go, it can't be filthy.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_04: Right.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_04: So when you were younger all those years ago, and you had to settle an argument, or you had to decide like team captains, what would you have done?
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_01: Settle an argument.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_04: Well, you're like, yeah, who's gonna be the team captain?
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_04: So is it gonna be you or you?
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_04: Who's gonna decide?
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, well, I don't know, I think I come across that situation, really, but what would we do?
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like a little It was always the probably the most popular kid, wasn't it?
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_01: Or the long tree.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so I always hope you'd say, like, you know, dip, dip, dip, my blue ship, sailing on the water, like a cup and saucer, O U T spells out, and you do a finger each time you say something.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god, it's gonna be one of them episodes.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_04: But anyway, it's not that, but it's that sort of game, you know.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_04: You decide who would be the captain.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_04: So can you think of something else?
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: A pigeon toss, I suppose.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_01: What the fuck's a pigeon toss?
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_01: When you get the coin, you think you're nearest to the wall.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_04: Why is it called a pigeon toss?
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's always been called a pigeon toss.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_04: But I don't know why.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_01: Did you just made that up?
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_01: No, Google it.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not gonna Google it now, am I but I cordn?
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_04: I know, yeah, yeah.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway, Google it at the end.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, you know what?
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_04: You show them your age.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, a pigeon toss.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_04: You're probably like tossing a titny bits or something.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_04: A big penny for the international listeners, that's a British old money.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: Very old.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: Stopped in 1970, didn't it, with the decimalisation?
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, you were actually alive as well.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, so what did the tooth fairy bring you when you were losing your teeth?
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_01: Ten pence, I think.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_04: Fuck all.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_01: Fuck all, yeah.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_01: An IOU.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_04: An IOU, yeah.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_04: Fucking hell.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_04: A green shield stamp.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_04: I think ten pence is what we used to get.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I think I got or a five pence, something like that.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_04: You got quite a lot of five pence when we were kids.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_04: Didn't you?
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_04: Or sweetie's anyway.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_04: Fucking hell.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_04: The game.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway.
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_04: So, rock, paper, scissors.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, okay.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_04: Did you do that?
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_01: I still don't know how that works.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_04: Paper smothers rock.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_04: Rock smashes scissors and scissors cut paper.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_04: So any combination can win.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_04: Right.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_04: So it's just a chance, basically, whatever one you do with your hand.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_01: The thing is now, if if I if we were to do that now, yeah, I wouldn't know.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_01: If you said to me, Ah, that that beats that, I'd just go, yeah, okay, yes, I'm.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_04: So I'd just wear anyway.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_04: So for those out there uh who've been living in a tree or in countries maybe where you just don't do these sort of things, it's something that you do to decide, you know, who's who's going to be captain or whatever, that kind of thing.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_04: When you're kids, and you do rock, paper, scissors with one hand, and yeah, you know, one hand each, obviously.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_04: And a rock is a bald fist, paper is a flat hand, and scissors is obviously scissors with your two fingers.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_04: And you each you go one, two, three with your hand up and down, and then you do a rock, a paper, or a scissors.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_04: And like I explained before, you know, the the rock bashes, the the scissors, etc.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_04: etc.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_04: And uh that's how you decide who the winner is or who the captain's gonna be or whatever.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_04: And I always thought that it was something that you know it was made up in a kid's schoolyard by you, I don't know, some high teenager in the 60s or something.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_04: Probably a little slur for me too.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_04: It's like a slurpy ASMR there.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_04: Sorry about that.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_04: I've actually I've um retuned my microphone, so you could be getting all sorts of stomach noises and everything.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_04: So, anyway, it's not something invented by a stoned teenager in the 60s, it goes way back.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_04: So, why am I talking about this?
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_04: 27th of August, this episode goes out on the 27th of August, is World Rock Paper Scissors Day.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_04: Sounds made up, it is, but actually it's it's being recognised because we don't realise that it's one of the oldest like games, games, yeah.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and it's uh actually believed to have originated in China around 2,000 years ago during the Han Dynasty.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, yeah.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that was the name.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_04: So swiftly moving on.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_04: It was known as Shushling.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_04: From there it spread into Japan, where it evolved into the version we know today, and over there it's known as uh Jianken, or don't it's Yanken?
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_04: Yanken, Jianken, yeah.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, the game reached Europe and obviously became popular worldwide during the 20th century, so that's how we know it.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_04: So it's not a children's game, it is older than Christianity.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_04: Awesome.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_04: How mad is that?
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_04: So, why rock, paper, scissors?
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_04: We actually don't know for certain, but like I said before, the beauty is that every option can win.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_04: So it's good for kids if you know it's fair.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: Do you know what I mean?
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: Can you change them?
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: So can you have just three different things?
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_04: Like chair, table, microphone.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so that's a lot of people.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_04: But then you've got to decide what how which one wins and why and how yeah.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_04: You're complicating things, stop.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_04: I can do this because Jim's here.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_04: I wouldn't do that.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_04: I just cut it out.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_04: So we don't know why rock, paper, scissors.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_04: Like I say, um, every option wins, it's good for kids, and all that.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_04: So um the strategy, you think it's random, but apparently it's not.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_04: Psychologists have studied thousands of games, and uh, there's some interesting patterns that emerge.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_04: Right.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_04: People tend to throw rock first, especially if they're playing for the first time, because psychologically, rock represents strength and power.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_04: So without them thinking of it, subconsciously they're choosing the thing that they think is gonna win because it's the strongest, most powerful weapon, if you like.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_04: And they're less likely to choose paper.
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_04: So they've studied these patterns, um, and they can basically predict what people may do in a game, yeah.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_01: And there's no more choice though.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's only three, isn't it?
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_04: So well, well, let me come to this in a second.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_04: Another finding if someone loses with one of the choices, they often change.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_04: So if they lose on scissors, they'll change to rock or whatever.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_04: They won't use it.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 14:13
  SPEAKER_04: If they lose on it, but if they win, they tend to repeat it.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_04: So professional players actually watch for these patterns.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like tells.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, they read on body language and human behaviour more than actually playing the game.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_04: So I'm saying professional players, because there is a world championship.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_01: Go away.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_04: Uh-huh.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_04: Thousands of competitors have entered over the years.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, big audiences.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_04: Prize money has reached tens of thousands of dollars.
• 14:45
  unknown: No way.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_04: And players don't just stand there like throwing shapes.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, there's like theatrics, mind games, and like intimidation and trashy talk and stuff like that.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_04: People wear ridiculous costumes, and some have even got entrance music.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_04: It's like WWE.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_04: It's fucking brilliant, it is.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_01: Great non-contact sport.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_04: It is a good, yeah, it is.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_04: So, researchers, because they can't fucking stop meddling, have built an AI that can beat humans.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_04: Not because it cheats, because humans are predictable.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_04: And computers analyse your previous throws, they notice patterns and then exploit them.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_04: And the more rounds you play, the better the AI becomes because it's just laying your like behaviour patterns.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_04: It's fucking depressing, isn't it?
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_04: Scary as well, really.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_04: It's this rock, paper, scissors actually being used in loads of different things.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_04: I found that professional sports teams have used rock, paper, scissors in certain uh circumstances, and uh there's an argument over inheritance that's being settled with rock, paper, scissors.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_04: I suppose it sort of stops any like real argument.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_04: It's like right, it's like a duel.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_04: A duel in the olden days, but nowadays we're too chicken to draw a pistol.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_04: We just draw our hand and throw a rock, paper, scissors.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, there's been some world records.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_04: The largest rock, paper, scissors tournament involved over 2,900 participants all playing simultaneously.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: It's not a very long game, is it?
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_01: So they have like sets.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_04: They'll have knockouts, won't they?
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_04: So they'll start with 2,900 and then they'll have to be.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_01: No, I mean when you get to your third goal, if you get them beat, you say no, best of five.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, I don't know, actually, yeah, because then your psychology thing.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know if you look into the game.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_04: No, fuck off, Jim.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_04: You've just given me homework in knob.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, there's been other variations, and it's come from the big bang theory.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and they've uh calls it the rock, paper, scissors, lizard spock.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_04: So they've thrown in lizard and spock, and I'm not going to go into it because it'll just like fuck with your minds.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_04: If you're interested, just look it up rock, paper, scissors, lizard and spock.
• 17:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:02
  SPEAKER_01: I won't be looking for that one anytime soon.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_01: I know we are.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_04: So around the world it's known by dozens of different names.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and like I said before, humans almost never play completely random.
• 17:14
  SPEAKER_04: But children are generally less predictable than adults.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_04: So they wouldn't necessarily follow the same patterns.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_04: I'd be fucking great at that.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_03: So you would you could play with with all the kids and they still beat you.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_01: Got a one in three chance, haven't you?
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean?
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_04: But you're also the person that does have doesn't have like internal dialogue and thought.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_04: You don't sit there and you know crunch over things in your brain and that, do you?
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_04: Which is like mind-blowing.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_04: So you might have noticed there that I brought up uh the Guinness Book of Records.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_02: I did.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_04: And it's no coincidence that I threw that in there because on the 27th of August 1955, the Guinness World Book No, the Guinness Book of Records was published.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, with Norris and Ross Machwitter.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_01: They were the two presenters that presented it, but they actually wrote it first, I think.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_04: But you're right with that bit.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_01: So that was good.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_01: Blue Peter's a lion.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_01: Shout out to Twatch, then because they that's what they always said.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_04: It depends, you're a lion on your memory.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: Mind you with the BBC, you see.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_01: Like about every fucking day.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_04: So gonna speak of records.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_04: So ironically, it wasn't created because people wanted like fame for doing extraordinary things like new feats and all that, you know.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_04: It was actually started to um because people were having an argument in a pub and they wanted a way to settle pub arguments.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_04: So back in 1951, Sir Hugh Beaver.
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_01: Huge beaver.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_04: I knew! I knew you were gonna say that.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_04: That's why I started giggling before I even finished the word beaver.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_01: So I can I'm predictable, what can I say?
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_04: Sir Hugh Beaver Margin director of the Guinness Brewery was on a shooting trip in Ireland, and an argument broke out over which game bird was the fastest in Europe.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, nobody could prove who was rice, so beaver, huge beaver, had an idea.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_04: What if there was a book that settles every pub argument?
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_04: Um, so they decided that they were gonna create this book, and the McQuerta twins were hired to compile it.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_04: So it wasn't uh invented or thought up by them, they were actually paid.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_04: Paid to see it.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_04: They were hired to compile it, yeah.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_04: And the first edition obviously became an instant bestseller.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_04: And I was trying to think why, but when I was a kid, I was fascinated by um what people were doing.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_04: Well world records, record breakers with Roy Castle.
• 19:52
  SPEAKER_04: You know, for those in the UK you know who are maybe over 45, you might remember that.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, record breakers, brilliant, with Roy Castle who died of lung cancer and didn't smoke a cigarette in his life.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yep, from working on clubs, yeah.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, um, so I was always fascinated by amazing things that humans put themselves through and some stupid things that humans did as well.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_04: As a kid, it was just good entertainment, wasn't it?
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, please.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_04: And getting the Guinness Book of Records annual, I never did.
• 20:19
  SPEAKER_04: I think it was a bit too expensive for Father Christmas when I was little, yeah, to be honest.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, or maybe too heavy for his sack.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_01: I used to get the year before, year before before us.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_01: My but my ma worked a year back.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_01: Oh but it's 1972, man.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, it was cheap last fucking Christmas after the sales.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_04: I'm telling you, and your mum would do that, she fucking did.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I'm telling you.
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_04: So the Asked the McCurta twins did this, became a bestseller, and um originally it was it was given away free in pubs, yeah, before um a publishing company took it on, and then it became the phenomena that it is, and it still earned an awful lot of money.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_04: Competitors, so you know, even though they do have a site online, I think there's a paywall to access some some stuff, if I remember right, because I've tried to access the um Gaines World, but I can't say it.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_04: Gainers Booker Records.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_04: I've tried to access it a few times, and there's been paywalls, not fucking paying.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_04: Um, but you can still buy the hard back books and that.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_04: There's still people that like to collect these sort of things, you know, they are highly collectible.
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_04: And I've looked at some of the um prices.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_04: No, the prices, but also the the change in them over the years, the size, the thickness, and the quality, and it's it's it's really interesting, actually.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_01: I always remember the one that's done um my favourite ones that you'd always had on Roy Castle was the uh dominoes.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_01: Two dominoes.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_01: Ah fucking brilliant.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_04: Making like dominoes, castles, towns, villages, and all that kind of thing.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, they were brilliant, and then you'd try it yourself, wouldn't you?
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_04: Your own cards and get two.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_04: Get two.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_04: I have about three attempts and then just like three of the cards across the room.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_04: So let's look at some uh amazing people out there, whether it's because they are amazing in themselves, yeah, extraordinary in how they look, or things that they've done, just a few things.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_04: There's a guy called Roger Bannister.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_04: And would you know go on?
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_04: You went, yeah, what's he famous for?
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_01: He's the first person to do the mile in under um so many minutes.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_01: Four minutes.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_04: He actually did it in three minutes, 59.4.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_04: On the 6th of May 1954.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_04: So it was just before the uh the Book of Guinness Book of Records.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_04: Every time I need to say it, Jim, I'm gonna tip you the wink so you can say the thing for me.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_04: Okay that book.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_01: That book, yeah.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_04: That dead famous book that's earned loads of money.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_04: I'm gonna read it out, the Guinness Book of Records.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_04: It's actually there, I could actually read it if I wanted to.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_04: Because I'm a dickhead, I'm not anyway.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_04: So it was it was just before it was published, but it still made it in there because he obviously broke that record originally.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it didn't last very long though.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_04: Um I think it was you know 46 days later, the 21st of June, uh, an Australian runner, John Landy, ran um three minutes 57.9 seconds.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_04: Now, at the time, um doctors genuinely believed it was physically impossible to run a mile in under four minutes.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_04: And Roger Barrister was like, Fuck you, I'm gonna prove you're wrong.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_04: But then that was a catalyst, obviously, and the autopsy who have done it since.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_04: But you know, he held the record.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_04: Should have looked it up, really, shouldn't I?
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_04: Dunno.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_04: Shorter.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_01: Shorterly half a mile.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_04: So the tallest man ever.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_04: How tall do you think he was?
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_04: His name was Robert Wadlow.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_01: He was I think he was someone like an eight six or something like that.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_04: More.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_01: Nine six.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_04: Less.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_04: So eight something.
• 23:54
  SPEAKER_01: Was he?
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_04: So eight foot, eleven point one inches.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, huge guy.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_04: And for those who work in metres, that is 2.72 metres.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, I don't work in metres, but I know how big a meter is.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_04: And nearly three metres sounds fucking huge for a human being.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_04: It is.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_04: And again, practical stuff, yeah, walking, just walking through normal buildings, getting on public transport, getting in a car, riding a bike, standing over your rhinal.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_01: He had a stick when he was older, I think, as well.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_04: Standing over your rhinal.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_04: You'd be tiring over it, wouldn't you?
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_04: You'd be pissed everywhere.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, unfortunately.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_04: On a little uh it'd be like now us going to an infant school and sitting on their toilets.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_04: Do you remember how small them toilets were?
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_01: But I've been into our kids, so I've sort of got an idea.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_04: So when we went to onto the school eve and things, I went to the toilet one day and there's like little tiny toilets.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_04: I mean my knees were up to my chest.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_04: I was dying for a piss I had to go.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_01: Miss knocking on the door.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_04: You stop smoking on toilets.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_03: Wash your hands when you go out.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_04: But yeah, all the practical things, you know, just sit on normal toilets and all that.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_04: Mad did it.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_04: So anyway, uh, and he's still the tallest verified human ever recorded.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_04: His shoes were a size 37 AA and US sizes, and their size is just slightly bigger than ours, I think, aren't they?
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_04: Way smaller.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_04: Um is a six and eight here.
• 25:27
  unknown: Yeah.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_01: It's like a half size or a full size, like.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_04: So the US is slightly smaller than us.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_04: And each shoe weighed around two kilo.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_04: Fucking hell.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_04: Imagine carrying shoes weighing two kilos.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_04: He needed around 8,000 calories a day.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_04: And by the age of 22, he was obviously famous worldwide, but he tragically died.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_04: Do you remember how he died if you watched the programme?
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_04: So he died after a brace rubbed against his ankle, causing an infection.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_04: Shame, isn't it?
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_04: So um it's it's quite tragic, really.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_04: He was just like you know only 22.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_04: But then it makes you think he might he might have had uh he might have had complications because of his size further on down the line.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_04: So if he didn't get an infection, he might have died young from something else.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_01: Well, this I might be thinking of I think might must be thinking of somebody else because the guy that was on record breakers that I remember, he was an older guy, but he was huge.
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_01: Um so I don't know.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_04: He he was still alive.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_04: Right.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_04: Well it might have been on there because he was alive.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_04: This is this this guy is still the tallest verified human ever.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_04: But I mean, imagine like his side of his grave, probably was a cremation, wouldn't he?
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_04: When was this?
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know when it was now.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_04: But um if they buried him, he needs like a lot of plots, yeah.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_04: So anyway, speaking of which, the heaviest person in medical history.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_04: So he weighed 635 kilo, and for those working stones like us, a hundred stone.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_04: And his name was John Brouer Minnach, and um he still is the heaviest person in recorded history.
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I mean, obviously the what year was this?
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_04: Um 1970 something.
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, yeah, late 70s, I'll come to that in a minute, I'll try and find it.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, uh, he went into hospital um for weight loss, not surgery but management, and um to go on like a special strict diet so they could monitor what he was intaking.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, and uh it took over a dozen firefighters to move him from his home into hospital, and the hospital beds are actually two beds strapped together.
• 27:44
  SPEAKER_04: Imagine humiliation.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, because okay, you know, you can argue, you know, that he's he's feeding himself and everything, but after you get to a certain point and you need calories because you get hungry and you can't move because you get so big you can't burn it off.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so I do have sympathy with people that get to this size because they really can't lose it without some kind of intervention, can they?
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_04: And then the humiliation of being moved out of their home.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_04: Remember the guy to have his window removed?
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, oh my god, it's just awful, really, isn't it?
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_04: You know, nobody nobody sets out for this, do they?
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_04: You know what I mean?
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_01: So he was what what was he, 600 kilograms?
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_04: He's 635 kilograms.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_04: I'm about 65, 66 kilo now.
• 28:21
  SPEAKER_01: So a thousand kilograms is a ton, isn't it?
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think.
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_01: Is it a thousand kilograms?
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, fucking hell.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_04: Mad that, isn't it?
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_04: Over half a ton.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_04: 100 stone.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_04: So anyway, following a strict diet, uh monitored by medics, he lost more than 419 kilo of the 635, which is still one of the largest documented weight losses ever recorded, as well.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_04: So he's uh up there for both reasons, really.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_04: So that weight loss was like remarkable, but it didn't reverse years on his life, unfortunately, because of his size.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_04: He had congestive heart failure, restrictive lung disease, and he has a disease called Piquinian syndrome.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_04: I looked it up, and it's uh otherwise known as obesity hyperventilation syndrome, where breathing becomes too shallow and carbon monoxide builds up in your blood.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, right.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_04: So you must feel like you're suffocating, mustn't you?
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_01: Well, yeah.
• 29:11
  unknown: Fuck me.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_01: See with carbon monoxide, you just fall asleep, don't you?
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_01: So maybe it's you know enough oxygen to get more carbon monoxide.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_04: But you must have to work harder to get it in, yeah.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_04: Which is gonna put more stress on your heart and your lungs.
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_04: Fucking hell, man.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_04: Obviously, a severe chronic edema as well, swelling, you know, everywhere, really, but especially the legs and all that, you know.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_04: He'd hoped to reach 95 kilo, which is very manageable.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and he described his weight loss as a chance of a new life, but obviously his health was just so fragile, it wasn't gonna happen for him.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_04: He was discharged from hospital in uh 1980.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so that's why I said late 70 years before, but he soon began regaining weight again as soon as he went home.
• 29:54
  SPEAKER_04: And uh he deteriorated, and is the recorded weight that increased by 91 kilos in seven days now.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_04: 91 in seven days, you can't do that by overeating.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_04: No, so um, we know that it was largely like the return of like massive flow retention because while he was in hospital, he was on this special diet, but also probably on medication, being closely monitored, and also he was just he was a poorly man, yeah, yeah.
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_04: He was to say you're eating, and uh he just wasn't well at all.
• 30:22
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, he died on the 4th of September 1983, age 41.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_04: And at the time of his death, he still weighed 362 kilos, which is 57 stone.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_04: Big man.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_04: And his death certificate was listed as cardiac arrest as the immediate cause, with respiratory failure, uh failure and restrictive lung disease as contributing factors.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_04: So even after losing more than 900 pounds, his coffin still occupied two cemetery plots.
• 30:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's what he says, wasn't it?
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it took around 11 men to carry the cascass.
• 30:56
  SPEAKER_04: And the the I said coffin here, but it said it had to be specially built from thick plywood and then reinforced.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_04: Mad that.
• 31:04
  SPEAKER_04: I'm wondering why he wasn't cremated, but it's probably his size.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_04: He might not have been asked to go in a crematorium.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's less than that.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_04: You don't think about it like this, do you?
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_04: It's nuts, isn't it?
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_04: Absolutely nuts.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, I'll light it now to finish this segment.
• 31:17
  SPEAKER_04: Have you ever heard of um Shridhart Chile?
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 31:21
  SPEAKER_04: Shridhart Chilal?
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_04: Um, he's an Indian guy, I think.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_04: Yes, uh, from Pune in India.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_04: And he, you've seen him, he might have been record breakers or Blue Peter talking about before you're 66.
• 31:35
  SPEAKER_04: And he had the longest nails, fingernails.
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_01: Might have seen him, yeah.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, the combined length of his fingernails in his left hand were 29 feet and 10 inches.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_04: Obviously, the curled.
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's it.
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_04: But he was still long before they started curling, and his longest nail was his thumbnail, and that nail alone.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_04: How long do you reckon that nail alone was?
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_01: Oh good metre and a metre and a half.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, not bad.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_04: Six foot, five point nine inches, which is actually 197 centimetres.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_01: So that's two metres.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 32:14
  SPEAKER_01: But obviously he decaled, didn't he?
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, and his nails became so heavy they apparently damaged his left hand.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_04: Mad.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, so why is he in the game speaker records?
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_04: So, yes, he has got the longest fingernails still on record, but also um his nails are eventually cut in New York.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_04: It was like a ceremony, I think it was in Times Square or something, like a ceremonial cutting of his nails.
• 32:37
  SPEAKER_04: And they couldn't just use it and cut it cut his nails using normal clippers, they had to use one of the little circular grinder thing, yeah, like a Dremel to cut his nails, and they were displayed then in a museum.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_04: Um, so he started growing the nails when he was 14 in 1952, and they were cut on the 11th of July 2018 on his left hand.
• 32:59
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 32:59
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_04: I wanted to know why.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_04: The story goes that when he was in school, uh, a school teacher had long fingernails, and um he must have done something with a school teacher, and he accidentally broke one of the teacher's fingernails, and he went mad, absolutely mad.
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_04: You'll never understand the care it takes to keep these long fingernails traumatised, and she really liked scorns him for it.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, he never forgot it, and so to prove them wrong, he decided to never cut his fingernails on his left hand, obviously, it must have been right dominant, um, and he did because he cared for them all of his life.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_01: I don't think they call them fakias or something like that, where the um sorts of people who do things like that, you know, put spikes through the face and don't know.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_01: There's like uh I think it's like a um supposed to be like a mystic eastern sort of type of thing, you know what I mean.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_04: But do you remember the episode of Dead where people put skewers through the cheeks?
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and the with the cobras and all that type of stuff.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 33:59
  SPEAKER_04: If only could have seen Jim just then.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_04: He was simulating a bit of snake charmer.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_04: Ha ha ha! Oh Jim, you need to be on camera.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_01: Just as well.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, you have to just take my word for it, phone because that was gold.
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_01: Take no she's just lying.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_04: Not lying.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_01: I just whistled, honest.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_04: So anyway, imagine having those nails, even on his left hand.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_04: Like I said before, it caused permanent nerve damage.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and he had constant pain from his fingertips from through his wrist, elbow, and shoulder.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_04: Nice.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_04: You get that, and you haven't even got long fingernails.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 34:33
  SPEAKER_04: Maybe a hymn come come from past life.
• 34:36
  SPEAKER_04: Jim gets those exact symptoms, don't you?
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_04: It's not from wanking too much, it's on your left hand.
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_01: Left hand told me if he's a bit fucked as well.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_04: Some people would be like taking a little while to get that joke, other people get it instantly.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_04: Right then.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_04: So just before we move on, there's this one guy, David Rush, and he's a he's a serial record breaker.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_04: He's um broken the record for the most marshmallows caught in his mouth in one minute, which is 58.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_04: He made a homowed catapult and then fired the marshmallows at himself, didn't eat them, just caught them.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_04: He um he won the record for most consecutive axe juggling catches, 2,919, not toy axes, real axes.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_04: Uh it took years of practice, apparently, probably lost a few fingers in the process.
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_04: He won the record for the longest time balancing a Christmas tree on his chin, which was hang on.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_04: One hour, 30 minutes and five seconds.
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_01: How big was the Christmas tree?
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_01: Um don't know.
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_04: I have to look at that.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_01: Holes in the research.
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_04: I'm thinking six foot, but maybe it was like six inches.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_04: Um it's it must be big, isn't it, in the world record, isn't it?
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_04: That book that I just forgot again.
• 35:50
  SPEAKER_04: Let me read it.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_04: The Guinness Booker Records.
• 35:53
  SPEAKER_01: Guinness Booker World Records, yeah.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_04: That one.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_04: And he also won the record for most toilet rolls balanced on the head.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_04: I'd do that.
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_04: 101 rolls balanced for 30 seconds.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_04: And he said that was one of the most uh frustrating records he'd ever attempted because it took thousands of failed attempts.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_04: Would you be asked?
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_01: I know the fellow used to catch the coins and he's uh he he's done the coins on his elbow, and he I'm sure someone's done that.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_01: He stacked loads of coins, it was on Ginnasby, it was on Rui Castle, yeah.
• 36:24
  SPEAKER_01: Um record breakers, and he had them all on his, he placed them in like 10 pounds.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_04: Did you try them bit in a row up his arm?
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_01: Up his arm like that, and then that's a can't catch as many.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, big hands as well, didn't he?
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_04: To catch them.
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, you have to, wouldn't you?
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, not little hands like mine.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_02: No, definitely not right then.
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_04: So we're gonna move on.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_04: I had a few other little things when I'm bored of getting flippy records now.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_04: You can always look up yourselves, folks, if you want to know more, you know.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_04: Right, so we're gonna move on to uh I was gonna do a dangly bit, but because we're not on camera, we can't it was a visual one.
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_04: So it's all your fault.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's all my fault.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_04: And you didn't you miss your sneak charmer.
• 37:02
  SPEAKER_01: Guilt me.
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_04: You're not asked.
• 37:05
  SPEAKER_04: I can tell.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_04: So we're gonna move on to a segment, and I don't know how I found it now.
• 37:11
  SPEAKER_04: But it went, it was on it was a rabbit hole.
• 37:13
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, yeah.
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know which hole because there's a lot of the rabbit holes.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_04: It's with my to-do list.
• 37:19
  SPEAKER_04: I can't find me to-do list.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_04: I genuinely left you can't find me to do list, I don't know where it is.
• 37:23
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I'm gonna write it out again.
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 37:25
  SPEAKER_04: That's the only problem with lists.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_04: I know, we've got loads anyway.
• 37:28
  SPEAKER_04: So if I was to say mummies, not in the mummies are mythology type thing.
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, where's your mind go when you say mummies in Egypt, I suppose?
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_04: So doors goes to Egypt, pharaohs, pyramids, and all that.
• 37:45
  SPEAKER_04: But actually, um the Egyptians were not the first people to mummify the people in general.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_04: Who do you think were the first?
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_04: And when?
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_01: And when.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_04: So if you think about it, the mummy, the earliest mummy is around 5,000 years ago, wasn't it?
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_04: It was 3,000 BC.
• 38:05
  SPEAKER_01: It was already down somewhere.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, something like that.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:08
  SPEAKER_01: So well before then there was the Sumerians and I don't know whether they practiced it.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_01: That was they were sort of Iran-Iraq type of Iraq area, I think.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_04: Well, I'm looking at your puzzles, it's not that.
• 38:21
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 38:21
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like that going, what?
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_01: So mummy's Chinese.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_01: Chinese always goes to the Chinese.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_04: I would have said China as well.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_04: Like that, um, the oldest ancient library that time.
• 38:33
  SPEAKER_04: Fucking loved their episode.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_04: I was thinking China as well.
• 38:38
  SPEAKER_04: Chinese fascinate me, you know.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_04: The fucking shit they've buried, but it's loads and loads and loads of stuff underground, you know.
• 38:42
  SPEAKER_04: Oh clever, clever the way they've thought about how they're gonna store all this stuff, man.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_04: Just everything, everything in general, yeah.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_04: Thanks for our phones, yeah.
• 38:53
  SPEAKER_04: So the oldest recorded mummy that's been found is not just one, there's lots.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_04: Was 2,000 years before the earliest recorded Egyptian mummy.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah?
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_04: So 5,000 years BC on the Pacific coast of South America.
• 39:13
  unknown: Okay.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_04: Again, just not where I'd thought.
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_04: So it's what now is Northern Chile Chile.
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_04: I was gonna say Chile because of the Americans say Chile.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_01: I was gonna say Mayans and stuff like that, but for me, the Mayans was later on.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_01: So it was I was like, maybe not.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_04: So northern Chile.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_04: And these people mummified just irregular folk, they didn't mummify kings, they didn't build pyramids, they didn't build like ancient temples to remember the dead or anything like that.
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yes, they were carrying out one of the most astonishing and a little bit disturbing, actually, mortuary rituals ever in human history.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_04: So um, brace yourselves, folks, trigger warning.
• 40:00
  SPEAKER_04: Um, I'm gonna be a little bit graphic here about how they mummified these bodies.
• 40:05
  SPEAKER_01: That's gonna be fun.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 40:07
  SPEAKER_04: So these people were known as the Chincharo people, like I say, in Chile.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_04: And they lived in one of the most strangest places on earth.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_04: It's called the Atacama Desert.
• 40:18
  SPEAKER_04: And I don't know if you've ever heard of it actually.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_04: Um, it's often described as the driest non-polar desert on the planet.
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_04: Now I'm saying non-polar because actually there's some parts of the polar regions that have not had any sort of rain, snowfall in years, decades and decades.
• 40:35
  SPEAKER_04: So actually, in the scientific terms, it's a desert, even though it's ice because not actually had any foliage from the sky.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_04: So this place, the Atacama, is described as the driest non-polar.
• 40:48
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 40:48
  SPEAKER_04: Because actually there's some polar regions that are even drier in inverted commas, which is mad, isn't it, to think about it really?
• 40:54
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 40:56
  SPEAKER_04: So it's an incredibly harsh, harsh environment.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_04: However, it sits right beside the Pacific Ocean, full of fish, shellfish, and sea lions.
• 41:05
  SPEAKER_04: So the Chinchoro people, they weren't an empire, they weren't wealthy, but they were clever in where they placed themselves.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, and they learned how to adapt their environment.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_04: So they had food and sea water, um, and they learned to adapt to the desert.
• 41:21
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, they were like desert people, and they lived in really small groups of hunter-gatherers, uh, and they were known.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_04: We know there's like remains of um uh weapons and stuff, they were very good fishermen.
• 41:33
  SPEAKER_04: Were they no nomads?
• 41:35
  SPEAKER_04: No, they stayed in that area because it one, it was familiar to them, and they had the fish on the doorstep.
• 41:41
  SPEAKER_00: Right, yeah.
• 41:41
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, if they went further into the desert, they wouldn't have that on tap.
• 41:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_04: Um, but I don't know how they got their water.
• 41:49
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 41:50
  SPEAKER_04: So I don't know whether they they there was somewhere a natural spring somewhere if there were.
• 41:54
  SPEAKER_04: I couldn't find that out.
• 41:55
  SPEAKER_04: I did look because you know I'm like curious.
• 41:58
  SPEAKER_04: So this was 7,000 years ago.
• 42:01
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 42:02
  SPEAKER_04: It's mind-blowing anyway.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_01: There's even more stuff out there.
• 42:06
  SPEAKER_04: There must be, there must be, but we know about this, and there's loads that we know, so let me tell you.
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_04: We didn't know anything about these people until the early 1900s, so it's quite recent that we found them, really.
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_04: And archaeologists work in the northern Chile area, started on covering bodies, and they've at first assumed that they were maybe naturally preserved by the desert because we know that the desert is a really good natural preserver of all the salt and all that, yeah, and the minerals in there.
• 42:30
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and this desert almost preserves anything and everything.
• 42:34
  SPEAKER_04: They found lots of things in this desert.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_04: This is like just dries everything out, it dries everything out, yeah.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_04: It's like making it into um, what's it called?
• 42:42
  SPEAKER_04: Jerk.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_04: Well, that's what some mummies look like, jerk.
• 42:45
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 42:46
  SPEAKER_04: That's a bit vile, that's sorry, folks.
• 42:47
  SPEAKER_04: They saw her looking closer at these bodies and they realised they weren't just normal dried corpses.
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_04: Someone had deliberately taken them apart.
• 42:57
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 42:59
  SPEAKER_04: And then put them back together again.
• 43:01
  SPEAKER_04: Every single stage had been planned.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_04: And the old and oldest examples that they found date to around 5050 BCE.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_04: And like I said before, Egypt's earliest artificial mummies, so are they being mummified, appear around 3000 BCE.
• 43:21
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 43:22
  SPEAKER_04: So, like I said before, I mean, these are guys are doing this like two millennia before, yeah.
• 43:28
  SPEAKER_04: So, why did they do it?
• 43:29
  SPEAKER_04: Like I said before, nobody really knows.
• 43:32
  SPEAKER_04: So, unlike Egypt, there's no written records, there's no like, you know, priests and papyrus explaining the rituals, and there's there's just nothing.
• 43:41
  SPEAKER_04: So, archaeologists have had to work backwards from the Bossies themselves to find out as much information as they can.
• 43:48
  SPEAKER_04: And there's one leading theory, it's a bit emotional, really.
• 43:52
  SPEAKER_04: Um, living along this coastline was quite difficult, as you can imagine, and disease was really common.
• 43:57
  SPEAKER_04: So, infant mortality was really, really high.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_04: And some burial sites show huge numbers of babies and young children.
• 44:05
  SPEAKER_04: And researchers believe that grief may have shaped everything around this culture.
• 44:09
  SPEAKER_04: Right, yeah.
• 44:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_04: So instead of honouring like powerful leaders and kings, then Chinchoro appeared to have honoured everybody equally.
• 44:18
  SPEAKER_04: So probably would have been, you know, head of tribe, tribesmen and all that, you know, chiefs, councils and shit.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_04: But it wouldn't have mattered.
• 44:24
  SPEAKER_04: Everybody was treated the same women, children, babies, all that.
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_04: So that alone makes them quite unusual back then that they thought so highly, if you like, of just each and every one of them.
• 44:35
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 44:36
  SPEAKER_04: They weren't putting certain people on a pedestal.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and they didn't seem to care about stasis from what they found.
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_04: So there might have been elders, and they might have had maybe different jewellery on to show that they were elders, but they didn't seem to care about stasis, so the elders wouldn't have um wouldn't live in a bigger house or nothing like that.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_04: Not at all.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_04: And so therefore the death was also treated equally.
• 44:59
  SPEAKER_04: So the life and the death was treated equally.
• 45:02
  SPEAKER_04: So this process that I warned you all about before.
• 45:07
  SPEAKER_04: If somebody died, the body wasn't simply wrapped, it was dismantled.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_04: The skin was very carefully removed, so not peeled randomly, it was like deliberately separated from the body, almost like um removing a tailored suit, a body suit, yeah.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_04: Then they took away the muscles and the sinews, the organs were taken out, and the brain was removed.
• 45:32
  SPEAKER_04: So eventually, very little remained apart from the skeleton.
• 45:36
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_04: So if you can imagine how much anatomical knowledge would have been needed for this, you know, they weren't surgeons, but they clearly developed some techniques that had worked for a long time.
• 45:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah because what they've seen is the body's being put back together.
• 45:50
  SPEAKER_04: I'm going to talk about this in a minute, really skillfully.
• 45:53
  SPEAKER_04: So much so they've lasted all this time and with care.
• 45:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_04: So the fascinating thing is, unlike the Egyptians, the chincharo don't appear to have believed the internal organs needed were needed in the afterlife.
• 46:09
  SPEAKER_04: So the Egyptians, if you remember, carefully preserved the organs in what they call like canopic jars or something.
• 46:15
  SPEAKER_04: Canopic.
• 46:16
  SPEAKER_04: I knew it was something like that.
• 46:18
  SPEAKER_04: I've not just said jaws, um, because they believed they were important in the afterlife, yeah?
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_04: The chincharo seems to have completely like disregarded like the organs, they got a different focus.
• 46:29
  SPEAKER_04: Their priority was restoring the appearance and structure of the deceased, almost like creating a durable like effigy around the original skeleton.
• 46:40
  SPEAKER_04: So the evidence suggested that they cared more about reconstructing the whole person rather than preserving what was on the inside.
• 46:48
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 46:49
  SPEAKER_04: So that makes me believe that they thought that what made the person was on the outside, not on the inside.
• 46:55
  SPEAKER_04: So they were skilled but primitive in what they understood.
• 46:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's like a taxi dame for people.
• 47:01
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it is really, isn't it?
• 47:02
  SPEAKER_04: Fuck, did you hear my neck crack then?
• 47:04
  SPEAKER_01: Is that your neck?
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_04: If that came up on the microphone, I'm not gonna cut that out.
• 47:08
  SPEAKER_04: Fucking hell.
• 47:09
  SPEAKER_04: See it.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_04: I need a massage.
• 47:11
  SPEAKER_04: Kinga.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_04: King's a massuse that we know.
• 47:14
  SPEAKER_04: So yeah, the organs they didn't have held any importance whatsoever.
• 47:20
  SPEAKER_04: So researchers don't know what happened to the organs and the muscle and all that, but they believe that they're either just discarded, used in rituals or buried separately to the body and they're just decomposed because obviously they're not wrapped in anything, right?
• 47:32
  SPEAKER_04: They're just going to decompose.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_04: So what do they do to rebuild the body?
• 47:36
  SPEAKER_04: So once it was stripped down, the reconstruction began.
• 47:39
  SPEAKER_04: The skeleton was reinforced using sticks made from reeds and wood.
• 47:44
  SPEAKER_04: So even there's a skeleton there, obviously it can't, it hasn't got any muscle.
• 47:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 47:48
  SPEAKER_04: So it has to be reinforced.
• 47:49
  SPEAKER_04: But with reeds and wood, no metal or nothing.
• 47:51
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_04: So strong reeds.
• 47:53
  SPEAKER_04: So think of it like scaffolds inside the body holding the structure up.
• 47:57
  SPEAKER_02: Definitely.
• 47:58
  SPEAKER_04: And the empty spaces weren't left hollow.
• 48:00
  SPEAKER_04: Instead, they packed the body with materials, including, and they know this clay, plant fibres, ash, feathers, and animal hair.
• 48:10
  SPEAKER_04: So I think what they've done on this, they've carbon dated everything to see.
• 48:14
  SPEAKER_04: So there's been fragments of fibres and stuff there, and they've tested it and carbon dated it so they know what these things were inside the body.
• 48:24
  SPEAKER_04: Fucking amazing.
• 48:26
  SPEAKER_04: Love all this shit, man.
• 48:27
  SPEAKER_04: So this wasn't simply preservation, they were rebuilding the person, almost like creating the sculpture, like I said before, using the original skeleton as the frame.
• 48:36
  SPEAKER_04: Then, once that like um that skeleton was rebuilt, this form was rebuilt, the original skin was stitched back over the body with care.
• 48:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_04: Um, now I don't know exactly what they used for stitching.
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and I did try to research, I don't know whether they were making fibres back then.
• 48:57
  SPEAKER_04: I think they probably were.
• 48:59
  SPEAKER_01: Probably used the the gizzard or the um the dinners.
• 49:02
  SPEAKER_04: Well, it might not have been strong enough, but you know, like tree fibre, there might have been you know, like desert plants, they're very fibrous, aren't they?
• 49:09
  SPEAKER_04: They might have stripped them down, maybe, and use that kind of thing.
• 49:11
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
• 49:12
  SPEAKER_04: So I'd love to know that if anybody out there knows more about this, because I couldn't quite find what they used because I'm interested.
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_04: So they they sewed the skin back over the body, and if there wasn't enough skin, because obviously skin shrinks once it like dehydrates a bit off the body, they might have done things to maybe keep the skin hydrated, yeah, but it still just shrunk a little bit.
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_04: So they use sea lion hide.
• 49:34
  SPEAKER_04: Oh said you before those sea lines in the Pacific Ocean.
• 49:38
  SPEAKER_04: So they would have ate them, use the blubber, yeah.
• 49:41
  SPEAKER_04: It's called blubber, isn't it?
• 49:42
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah, for maybe fuel.
• 49:44
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, all of that, all that, and then use this skin probably for hide for protection, shield, shit, but also to preserve fucking bodies.
• 49:53
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I love this, very clever.
• 49:56
  SPEAKER_04: It is, isn't it?
• 49:58
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, this is fucking thousands of years ago, and they're literally tailoring a human body sack back together again.
• 50:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I don't think it'll probably look the same, but no.
• 50:09
  SPEAKER_04: You'd have a good go.
• 50:10
  SPEAKER_04: But they did have a good go, apparently, remodelling of the body, yeah.
• 50:15
  SPEAKER_04: So I was thinking about the face, um, and they said sometimes you know the face looked a little bit odd, and they'd have to like use a mask or they did mould a face out of clay or something like that.
• 50:26
  SPEAKER_04: Um, also the hair is replaced.
• 50:29
  SPEAKER_04: So sometimes people didn't have hair at the time of death, but I think hair meant a lot to them because they found remains, or all the remains had wigs made from human hair and they weren't short ones.
• 50:41
  SPEAKER_04: Some of the wigs measured over half a metre long.
• 50:43
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 50:44
  SPEAKER_04: So this tells us that hair meant something to them.
• 50:48
  SPEAKER_04: So they were given hair back if they lost it when they died.
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 50:52
  SPEAKER_04: Or they wore wigs in life and they kept them on death, so it meant a lot to them.
• 50:59
  SPEAKER_04: Archaeologists also have found black mummies and red mummies, and they divide the chincharo mummies into different styles.
• 51:08
  SPEAKER_04: So the earliest known are these black mummies, and these were coated in black manganese pigment.
• 51:14
  unknown: Okay.
• 51:15
  SPEAKER_04: Fuck me.
• 51:16
  SPEAKER_04: So the entire body became jet black, and then later, so this is how they date them.
• 51:21
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 51:22
  SPEAKER_04: Because of how they were the colour.
• 51:25
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 51:25
  SPEAKER_04: Later came the red mummies, and these were painted using red ochre.
• 51:29
  unknown: Yeah.
• 51:30
  SPEAKER_04: Interestingly, though, the faces of the red mummies were often left black.
• 51:35
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 51:36
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, no one knows exactly why.
• 51:38
  SPEAKER_04: They think maybe different traditions or changing beliefs as the culture uh evolved, or perhaps different communities.
• 51:46
  SPEAKER_04: So they lived in small huddles, like I said before, but they might have a little like a neighboring huddle.
• 51:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 51:51
  SPEAKER_04: So they might have differentiated them between by this, you know, you don't know.
• 51:55
  SPEAKER_04: Or it might have, you know, held some kind of symbolic meaning.
• 51:58
  SPEAKER_04: Obviously, that's been lost to time.
• 52:01
  SPEAKER_04: So uh, like I said before, babies were treated in this way.
• 52:05
  SPEAKER_04: Old people, it just did not matter.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_04: But archaeologists have said that uh children outnumber adults um incredibly, hugely, hugely.
• 52:16
  SPEAKER_04: So it looks like that, you know, if they reached adulthood, they were lucky, really.
• 52:20
  SPEAKER_04: And I wonder if maybe that's also why they cherished each other, because it maybe it was quite hard to reach adulthood for those that did.
• 52:28
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, those that did, they were celebrated, maybe, no matter what, you know, how long you've been around.
• 52:33
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, you were all the same and you know, well done, basically.
• 52:36
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so it's really, really unusual, isn't it?
• 52:39
  SPEAKER_04: You know, it wasn't about power and kings, it wasn't about you know preserving people for eternity for us to find the jewels and figure out who they are, what king they are.
• 52:49
  SPEAKER_04: It was just about like refusing to let the let the loved ones disappear.
• 52:52
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it's a nice thought.
• 52:54
  SPEAKER_04: It's nice, it's really, really, really nice.
• 52:56
  SPEAKER_04: Here's something even stranger though.
• 52:59
  SPEAKER_04: Some researchers believe the mummies weren't buried immediately.
• 53:03
  SPEAKER_04: And this takes me back to really early episodes that I did about um the tribe where they preserved the dead and like add them in the living room.
• 53:10
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 53:11
  SPEAKER_01: Bring them out once again and all that.
• 53:13
  SPEAKER_01: Change the clothes, get them wash.
• 53:14
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 53:15
  SPEAKER_04: The evidence suggests that families kept the dead for extended periods, like displaying them, carrying them during rituals, and perhaps involving them in community life before burial.
• 53:27
  SPEAKER_04: I'm like, how the fuck do they know this?
• 53:29
  SPEAKER_04: How do they know that these bodies in the ground were actually maybe kept out for a little while?
• 53:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 53:35
  SPEAKER_01: These have maybe have pollen or different pollens from on the clothes from different years.
• 53:39
  SPEAKER_01: They can ID their pollens because that's what they can do.
• 53:42
  SPEAKER_04: So you're complicating it, but yeah.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_04: No, but yeah, that could be a thing.
• 53:46
  SPEAKER_04: That's not what I found.
• 53:47
  SPEAKER_04: Many mummies showed signs of repeated repairs.
• 53:52
  SPEAKER_04: So layers of clay were patched up, paint was reapplied, wigs were replaced, and cracks were mended, like clay faces.
• 54:00
  SPEAKER_04: Um, if a bosie had been buried immediately, there'd be like little reason to repair.
• 54:05
  SPEAKER_04: So some bossies haven't been repaired at all, they're all in one piece.
• 54:08
  SPEAKER_04: Others are definitely being repaired.
• 54:11
  SPEAKER_04: So that told them that maybe they'd been kept out and then had to be repaired because they're deteriorating.
• 54:16
  SPEAKER_04: Some mummies had uh were consistent with handling, so the damage um didn't always match what you'd expect from like an undisturbed grave.
• 54:26
  SPEAKER_04: There was maybe like um oil marks on on the skin of like finger marks or something, you know.
• 54:33
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know, but there were signs of handling, so maybe handmarked on arms with like you know, clay had rubbed off and stuff like that.
• 54:41
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, definitely.
• 54:42
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, and the craftsmanship was apparently extraordinary.
• 54:47
  SPEAKER_04: So they weren't simply preparing the bossier for burial and preservation, there was absolute evidence that they were creating something that needed to be viewed by others and cared for.
• 54:59
  SPEAKER_04: So it was they were carefully preserved and presented.
• 55:02
  SPEAKER_04: It wasn't just a go in the ground, so they believed that they were to be viewed for a while.
• 55:08
  SPEAKER_04: It's amazing, really, what they found and what they can surmise from what they've you know from the evidence.
• 55:15
  SPEAKER_04: From the evidence, yeah.
• 55:16
  SPEAKER_04: And it all makes sense as well, doesn't it?
• 55:18
  SPEAKER_04: Bloody amazing it is.
• 55:20
  SPEAKER_04: So, why have so many survived?
• 55:22
  SPEAKER_04: It's the Atacama Desert, obviously.
• 55:25
  SPEAKER_04: The extreme dryness, it stopped the bacteria from breaking down the bodies and the salt, obviously.
• 55:31
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and so the archaeologists have been able to examine these ancient people in extraordinary detail.
• 55:38
  SPEAKER_04: It's just amazing, and there's loads of information out there, folks, if you want to know more.
• 55:42
  SPEAKER_04: There might have been TV programmes.
• 55:44
  SPEAKER_04: I tend not to watch TV programmes unless there isn't loads of information online.
• 55:49
  SPEAKER_04: The TV programmes then fill in the gaps what other researchers have or new stuff that I can't find online or whatever.
• 55:55
  SPEAKER_04: Um, only because sometimes TV programmes we throw a bit of drama in there.
• 55:59
  SPEAKER_01: Always.
• 56:00
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 56:00
  SPEAKER_04: And I I want the facts, I don't want the fluffy bits around the edge, you know, that they've made up or you know.
• 56:06
  SPEAKER_04: But uh there is loads of research out there, dead, dead interesting.
• 56:09
  SPEAKER_04: Some pictures and all that, it's just absolutely nuts.
• 56:14
  SPEAKER_04: So uh there you have it.
• 56:16
  SPEAKER_04: The Egyptians were not the first humans to mummify, it was these people in Chile doing amazing fucking things with bodies.
• 56:26
  SPEAKER_01: I've seen they're pushing the envelope back all the time on human existence and time.
• 56:33
  SPEAKER_01: They found an axe which is being documented in a complete piece of granite.
• 56:38
  SPEAKER_01: It it couldn't have just been put there, it wasn't stuck there.
• 56:41
  SPEAKER_04: The granite developed around it.
• 56:43
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, talking tens of thousands of years old.
• 56:46
  SPEAKER_04: Well, mean we know from watching um the Aussie Gold Hunters, yeah, which is brilliant, by the way, folks.
• 56:52
  SPEAKER_04: There's in the UK season 11 is out on discovery.
• 56:56
  SPEAKER_04: Plug.
• 56:56
  SPEAKER_04: I'm gonna give a little plug to to the Aussie um gold hunters.
• 57:00
  SPEAKER_04: You guys are phenomenal.
• 57:02
  SPEAKER_04: How you cope with your heath, because we cannot cope with just 35 degrees in the UK and we're indoors, we're not mining for gold, anyway.
• 57:10
  SPEAKER_01: Digress.
• 57:10
  SPEAKER_04: I have to get on to that, I can't remember.
• 57:12
  SPEAKER_04: Can't remember that's what happens when we go off on tangents, can't remember, anyway.
• 57:19
  SPEAKER_04: So just one little final thought.
• 57:21
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, it was the axe and the stone.
• 57:23
  SPEAKER_04: We know we know from the Daddy Gold Hunters that granite it develops over millennia, yeah, yeah, doesn't it?
• 57:29
  SPEAKER_03: Millions of years, yeah.
• 57:30
  SPEAKER_04: So that axe must have been around for years for the granite to form around her.
• 57:33
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, mad, isn't it?
• 57:35
  SPEAKER_04: Absolutely mad.
• 57:36
  SPEAKER_04: So one little final fact about the chincharo.
• 57:39
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, in 2021, the settlements, the morification site are recognised as a UNESCO World Heritage Site.
• 57:46
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, good.
• 57:47
  SPEAKER_04: And so it fucking well should.
• 57:49
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_04: Um, otherwise, you know, if it's not a World Heritage site, people are gonna start buying it up, taking bits of it, yeah, and all the rest of it.
• 57:57
  SPEAKER_04: So now it's being protected.
• 57:58
  SPEAKER_02: Good, good.
• 57:59
  SPEAKER_04: And the standards, isn't there with UNESCO?
• 58:01
  SPEAKER_04: Because we actually lost UNESCO, UNESCO states in Liverpool for one of our buildings.
• 58:05
  SPEAKER_01: Um, it was because they started to redevelop in the dock area and they took it off us because they gobshites.
• 58:10
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, something to do with Everton, but we're not gonna go there anyway.
• 58:14
  SPEAKER_04: Um, and with UNESCO comes certain standards that they've got to meet, and if they don't meet those standards, they lose it.
• 58:19
  SPEAKER_04: And part of that is keeping everything there and you know, keeping the integrity of it and all that.
• 58:24
  SPEAKER_04: So I'm really, really pleased that this is being given that status because this is like unreal discovery, isn't it?
• 58:31
  SPEAKER_04: You know, I mean, okay, it was discovered in the early 1900s, but most of what we know about it now is very, very recent because of the science that we've got now around DNA and all that kind of thing.
• 58:42
  SPEAKER_04: In the early days, they were piecing together physical evidence from what they can see.
• 58:46
  SPEAKER_04: Now we're piecing together the science, and what we know now is fucking mind blowing, isn't it?
• 58:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's amazing.
• 58:53
  SPEAKER_04: Absolutely brilliant.
• 58:54
  SPEAKER_04: Right, we can finish on a lazy lobotomy or a fetish factoid.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_04: Because we've been going for a bit and they all need a wee.
• 59:05
  SPEAKER_04: Then again, they could go for a tinkle while they're listening to us.
• 59:07
  SPEAKER_04: Unlike us, I'll need a wee right now.
• 59:08
  SPEAKER_04: We're recording.
• 59:09
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 59:10
  SPEAKER_04: And what can I go to?
• 59:10
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, I'm gonna sell your own.
• 59:12
  SPEAKER_04: Ah, yeah, yeah.
• 59:13
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have that choice.
• 59:14
  SPEAKER_01: When I want to go, I go.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_01: I know.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm not gonna even tell you about it.
• 59:17
  SPEAKER_01: Anyway, right, so let's do Lady Lobosomy.
• 59:19
  SPEAKER_04: Everybody loves Lady Lobosomy, don't they?
• 59:21
  SPEAKER_04: So I think we're gonna do Lady Lobosomy.
• 59:23
  SPEAKER_04: It's funny, um, lots and lots of people say, Oh, that's probably me one of my favourite parts of the pad that sells Lady Lobosomy.
• 59:29
  SPEAKER_04: Because I think a lot of people out there can relate to some of it.
• 59:32
  SPEAKER_04: Even if the subject matter isn't quite the same, the advice can be relatable.
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_04: So a lot of people get a lot of benefit from it, which is really nice.
• 59:40
  SPEAKER_04: So have you done a lady lobosomy before with me?
• 59:44
  SPEAKER_01: No.
• 59:45
  SPEAKER_01: This could go really badly wrong.
• 59:47
  SPEAKER_04: I don't think so, because even if this was supposed to be for you, you can relate to this.
• 59:52
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 59:53
  SPEAKER_04: Dear Lady Lobotomy.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_04: My husband spanked me a few times on the bus, assuming they're American, same but when we were having sex recently.
• 1:00:03
  SPEAKER_04: Not too hard.
• 1:00:04
  SPEAKER_04: It was just in the moment, and he hasn't done it before.
• 1:00:07
  SPEAKER_04: We watched porn occasionally and we see other guys do the same, so I think he got carried away.
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_04: Next time we had sex in brackets, not for a while, due to crotch goblins.
• 1:00:16
  SPEAKER_04: I asked him to spank me again, but he wouldn't.
• 1:00:19
  SPEAKER_04: He said it felt weird doing it last time and he wasn't comfortable doing it again.
• 1:00:23
  SPEAKER_04: He has never hit a woman, even in a moment like that.
• 1:00:26
  SPEAKER_04: Thing is, I really liked it.
• 1:00:27
  SPEAKER_04: I'd been secretly hoping he'd spank me after watching the porn.
• 1:00:30
  SPEAKER_04: I don't want to push him though into something he is uncomfortable with, but I'd like to open up a conversation where I can encourage him to experiment.
• 1:00:37
  SPEAKER_04: Please help.
• 1:00:38
  SPEAKER_04: Keep up the great work, team.
• 1:00:39
  SPEAKER_04: I love my dose of as a sell every Thursday.
• 1:00:42
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, love you all, Ronnie, female, age 34.
• 1:00:45
  SPEAKER_01: Nice.
• 1:00:46
  SPEAKER_01: So how does she go about?
• 1:00:50
  SPEAKER_04: How does she open up the conversation with her fella that she actually quite liked the spanking?
• 1:00:54
  SPEAKER_04: I know it's hard for you, but you know, can we experiment?
• 1:00:57
  SPEAKER_01: I think it goes along with how we started, sort of, because I was of the same conception.
• 1:01:02
  SPEAKER_01: Uh conception, same what, what, same what's the word?
• 1:01:08
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not telling you.
• 1:01:09
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, fuck off.
• 1:01:12
  SPEAKER_01: That's it, no sex for you.
• 1:01:14
  SPEAKER_04: That means no sex for you, so as if that's gonna happen.
• 1:01:18
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway.
• 1:01:20
  SPEAKER_01: So when we started, it I was just the same thing of like, yeah, I don't really want to hit you because like I don't do that.
• 1:01:27
  SPEAKER_01: Because I don't have an off switch if I hit somebody, I want them to stay hit.
• 1:01:31
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, and you don't hit girls unless you hit you first and the cunts.
• 1:01:34
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I'm which doesn't do by the way.
• 1:01:36
  SPEAKER_04: But if they do, well, yeah, your dad said you treat she's a lady like a lady, and so she's not a lady.
• 1:01:42
  SPEAKER_04: So if a woman takes a fucking swing at you, I think she's fair game.
• 1:01:44
  SPEAKER_04: If you don't agree with that, folks, then I'm sorry, but if she's gonna take a fair swing anyway, sorry.
• 1:01:49
  SPEAKER_04: So you don't you don't hit women, so it was hard for you.
• 1:01:51
  SPEAKER_01: So it was hard to be able to do that sort of thing, but bit by bit, just a little bit of light, light spanking, just on occasion, whereas like you might we might be just in the moment and just not progress it too quick, and uh and where where she's concerned, sort of sort of edge him to it, you know, like uh there's nothing wrong with a little bit of a spank, you know what I mean?
• 1:02:16
  SPEAKER_01: It releases the endorphins that are that that give you the buzz.
• 1:02:20
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so and maybe if she explains that to him, he might think more of it that way.
• 1:02:25
  SPEAKER_01: It's more of an endorph endorphin rush for her that she's enjoying.
• 1:02:29
  SPEAKER_01: Uh um there's I seen a reel not long ago and it and it said spanking can be uh and the endorphin rush you get from spanking can be beneficial health-wise because it's it reduces depression and stuff like that.
• 1:02:43
  SPEAKER_04: Well, it's octitousin and endorphins and all this, isn't it?
• 1:02:46
  SPEAKER_04: We always talk about the hormones.
• 1:02:47
  SPEAKER_01: That's it.
• 1:02:48
  SPEAKER_01: So so that there is a a positive to come out of it, but I see where he's coming from.
• 1:02:53
  SPEAKER_01: Like he doesn't want to see the thing is in in a guy's mind, he thinks that you want to be slammed into the door, whereas really, really it's it's building it up, and you can go harder once you've built up.
• 1:03:07
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, it it literally is just a little tap to start off with, and then tap, tap, tap, and build up on it.
• 1:03:14
  SPEAKER_01: And if you're if she's enjoying it, then there's no reason why you can't enjoy it because it's part of your thing, then exactly.
• 1:03:21
  SPEAKER_04: So yeah, because I mean at first you weren't sure, and you were gauging my reaction.
• 1:03:26
  SPEAKER_04: You you'd you give me a little spank and you'd you'd give me a little look and see.
• 1:03:29
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:03:30
  SPEAKER_01: And the noise.
• 1:03:31
  SPEAKER_01: And and what's that out of ten?
• 1:03:32
  SPEAKER_01: You used to do that out of ten, didn't you?
• 1:03:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so I'd sort of like, okay, so want to push it a little bit, hit a little bit harder.
• 1:03:40
  SPEAKER_01: How's that on your pain scales?
• 1:03:42
  SPEAKER_01: So just and for the first couple of months it was like gauging what was comfortable and how far I could push it, yeah.
• 1:03:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um to be comfortable for you because uh you know, I like it because I like like it because you like it.
• 1:03:55
  SPEAKER_01: If if you weren't into it, I probably wouldn't do it.
• 1:03:57
  SPEAKER_04: Well no, there's no point, isn't it?
• 1:03:58
  SPEAKER_01: There's no point.
• 1:03:59
  SPEAKER_04: It's like it's like me beating the sub and they're not enjoying it.
• 1:04:02
  SPEAKER_04: What is the fucking point?
• 1:04:03
  SPEAKER_01: What's the point?
• 1:04:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 1:04:04
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, there's a way of there's a way of coming across it, and I think if you explain the endorphin to them, you you'd you'd find you might be a bit more receptible.
• 1:04:13
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I mean, I don't know whether and what was that fucking word?
• 1:04:17
  SPEAKER_01: Persuasion, I think.
• 1:04:18
  SPEAKER_01: Persuasion.
• 1:04:19
  SPEAKER_04: I think it was.
• 1:04:19
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not of that persuasion.
• 1:04:21
  SPEAKER_01: No, but I don't I'll we listen back and I'll get that.
• 1:04:25
  unknown: Okay.
• 1:04:26
  SPEAKER_04: If you come back and just re-record the word and we'll slot it in.
• 1:04:29
  SPEAKER_04: No, I'm gonna everybody hear me letting you sweat.
• 1:04:34
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, yeah.
• 1:04:35
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you, thank you.
• 1:04:36
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, we store that fuck.
• 1:04:38
  SPEAKER_03: That's gonna come back on my 10 fellow torus banking.
• 1:04:40
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so yeah, you were gauging, you were doing an out of tens, weren't you?
• 1:04:44
  SPEAKER_04: You were gauging my noises, I'd feed back to you.
• 1:04:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, but with this girl's concern, this guy doesn't want to do it at all.
• 1:04:50
  SPEAKER_04: And I don't know whether uh she's she's told the guy, uh, her husband, that she listens to the Pathetel podcast.
• 1:04:56
  SPEAKER_04: Maybe she does, I don't know.
• 1:04:57
  SPEAKER_04: Now, if you do, it's worth saying, you know what, spanking's come up on the Pathet Cell.
• 1:05:03
  SPEAKER_04: And I didn't know why I enjoyed the spanking.
• 1:05:05
  SPEAKER_04: I just like, oh, because I I know I shouldn't like it, and you know, you hitting me, it's not like something that I've that was talked about, but you did it, and I'm like, oh, that was nice.
• 1:05:12
  SPEAKER_04: And I've listened to the Path of Cell podcast, and I understand now that actually it can release these hormones, and that's what I like.
• 1:05:19
  SPEAKER_04: It's not the fact that you're whacking me, it's the fact that you're hitting me, and I'm getting this great sensation afterwards.
• 1:05:23
  SPEAKER_01: That's the thing, isn't it?
• 1:05:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's supposed to be fun and you're supposed to enjoy it as a part of your sex.
• 1:05:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 1:05:30
  SPEAKER_01: So if you're if you're able to give your missus a an orgasm by spanking it, then what's the difference between giving her an orgasm spanking and giving I'm giving her an orgasm fucking it?
• 1:05:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's it's an orgasm as an orgasm.
• 1:05:45
  SPEAKER_04: It is, yeah.
• 1:05:45
  SPEAKER_04: And for those that don't know have a listen to previous episodes, you can have pain gasms and you can have it from spanking and all sorts of different things.
• 1:05:52
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it's not like a normal orgasm, but it's it's mad, it's weird.
• 1:05:56
  SPEAKER_04: Anyway, so um I would definitely open the Conversation that way, uh that listen to Path of Cell podcast, and um I would say, and yeah, I understand that you might not want to hit me, but it's not necessarily the hissing, it's it's the result of it.
• 1:06:11
  SPEAKER_04: And yeah, if I know that you're okay with it, then I'm gonna vocalise more because she might have been keeping it in before.
• 1:06:17
  SPEAKER_04: I don't want to like sound like I'm enjoying it.
• 1:06:19
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, but if he knows she's enjoying it, she's gonna fucking tell him because I do, yeah, yeah.
• 1:06:24
  SPEAKER_04: Um and then that will please him and encourage him to do it more because he's seeing how much he's enjoying it.
• 1:06:30
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so I'm hoping then that by just opening up the conversation, like you've just rightly suggested, around the hormones, I might we can just flick a switch a little bit that's not violence, it's it's a it's doing something for an end result, which is really pleasurable and can be pleasurable for both for different reasons.
• 1:06:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and it depends on what you're into.
• 1:06:47
  SPEAKER_01: You could be into heavy fuddy impact, which is it it doesn't have to be hard, it's just the weight of a piece of kit just drop it on you.
• 1:06:57
  SPEAKER_01: Or it could or you might be into like stingy stuff and that you like to be like little stings all the time.
• 1:07:04
  SPEAKER_01: So it depends on yourself what you're what you're thinking about.
• 1:07:07
  SPEAKER_01: I think most people like who uh I've known from the club and also from from uh our experience most people like the heavy footy.
• 1:07:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, not many people like the stingy.
• 1:07:20
  SPEAKER_04: Now, do you know what it's so rare?
• 1:07:21
  SPEAKER_04: And when I find somebody who likes stingy, I'm like come here.
• 1:07:24
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, Appiari is one of them.
• 1:07:26
  SPEAKER_04: So he's one of the few people that I can use a fibre optics on because that is like edge play for people that like stingy.
• 1:07:32
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, that's probably the stingiest you could probably get.
• 1:07:35
  SPEAKER_04: It's unreal.
• 1:07:37
  SPEAKER_04: Um, so you're right, most people do like thuddy, and I think if you're gonna get a pain gasm, you're more likely to get it with Suddy, but you know, it could be wrong, there could be because I don't know.
• 1:07:43
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not into stingy so much.
• 1:07:45
  SPEAKER_04: I don't mind a sting from like a metal paddle.
• 1:07:49
  SPEAKER_04: You know, we've got that little metal paddle, and even though it's got a flat edge, it gives you a thud because of the weight of it, but because it's cold and metal, it gives you a sting as well.
• 1:07:57
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, okay.
• 1:07:58
  SPEAKER_04: Um, so yeah, I um stingy is just one of them things that I I don't know loads about myself.
• 1:08:05
  SPEAKER_04: So if there's people out there that can pain gas and from stings, stings, from stingy play, please let me know.
• 1:08:10
  SPEAKER_04: I'd be dead interested to know.
• 1:08:11
  SPEAKER_04: Um, so yeah, there's always different sensations, isn't there, that you can get just from spanking.
• 1:08:16
  SPEAKER_04: Flat hand is more stingy than cupped handed is more fuzzy, especially the size of them, size of your hands, and and the size of the hand does matter how you approach from underneath stuff like that with your ball of fist, obviously.
• 1:08:30
  SPEAKER_04: Load of different ways to do it, but you know, with this guy, he obviously doesn't want to hit it at all, so we're not gonna start off with punches, but I think start with hormones and go from there and see what happens.
• 1:08:40
  SPEAKER_04: I think so.
• 1:08:41
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's um it's a good starting point for everything else.
• 1:08:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and you find if he's into pleasuring you as much as he should be, then you've got that sort of he's looking for ways to pleasure, so we'd be happy to do it.
• 1:08:57
  SPEAKER_04: It's another dynamic if you're interested in it.
• 1:09:00
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, you know, but after years, you do the same thing all the time, it's just become a little bit stale.
• 1:09:04
  SPEAKER_04: You wouldn't want sex all the time because it's not evolving and changing.
• 1:09:07
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, once you've got this huge repertoire of things that you're into, you don't do them every shag.
• 1:09:12
  SPEAKER_04: You you dip, you take things from your repertoire each time, you know what you feel like on that night.
• 1:09:16
  SPEAKER_04: And by them you know, trying these different things, it could open all sorts out, and it's going to keep their sex life really fresh and enjoyable at the end of the day, isn't it?
• 1:09:25
  SPEAKER_04: And that's other things that you can bring into the conversation with them as well.
• 1:09:28
  SPEAKER_04: It is, yeah.
• 1:09:29
  SPEAKER_01: Like us after 21 years, love.
• 1:09:31
  SPEAKER_04: Ah, yeah.
• 1:09:32
  SPEAKER_04: We were 21 years married today, weren't we?
• 1:09:34
  SPEAKER_04: Yep.
• 1:09:34
  SPEAKER_04: Still finding new things out about each other.
• 1:09:37
  SPEAKER_01: Most definitely.
• 1:09:39
  SPEAKER_04: Some things are like, well, I didn't see that coming, but I'm glad it did.
• 1:09:43
  SPEAKER_01: As it hit it in the eye.
• 1:09:47
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 1:09:49
  SPEAKER_04: So on that side, swiping new fetishes, bombshell.
• 1:09:53
  SPEAKER_04: We're gonna go.
• 1:09:54
  SPEAKER_04: Did you enjoy that?
• 1:09:55
  SPEAKER_04: I did, yeah.
• 1:09:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:09:56
  SPEAKER_04: And we didn't get to do the faux paws or the go because I was just so into it.
• 1:10:00
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 1:10:01
  SPEAKER_04: And we're not gonna cut out your faux pars either, because they're the funny bits.
• 1:10:06
  SPEAKER_04: So we're gonna leave it all there.
• 1:10:08
  SPEAKER_04: If you are binge listening, put the kettle on.
• 1:10:10
  SPEAKER_04: We'll see you in five.
• 1:10:11
  SPEAKER_04: If not, we'll see you next week.
• 1:10:13
  SPEAKER_04: Ta-ra! Ta-and there we have it! Another day made better by listening to the creators of chaos.
• 1:10:22
  SPEAKER_04: Thanks for dropping by, and if you enjoyed the show, we'd really appreciate you sharing you love the Panthercell podcast with your friends.
• 1:10:29
  SPEAKER_04: Don't forget to give us a follow on our socials, maybe leave us some five-star reviews, and feel free to send us an email to Magic at thepantasellpodcast.co.uk, or even interact with us on Facebook because we love channels studio.
• 1:10:43
  SPEAKER_04: Be sure to stop by next week because that's what Mummy says.
• 1:10:47
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know where I'm going next, but I promise it will be boring.
• 1:10:51
  SPEAKER_04: Catch you soon!