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21: Humility About Our Weaknesses · Finding God at Work

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(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) Hi, I'm Chris.
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This is Finding God at Work.
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Just a reminder that Finding God at Work
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isn't just a podcast.
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It's also an online course.
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Check it out at findinggodatwork.org.
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Our current series is Meaningful Work, Calling, Formation,
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Service, and Love.
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It's award season.
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We've got the Grammys, we've got the Oscars.
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In the world of athletics, we've got the
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Super Bowl coming up, where people will be
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crowned Super Bowl champions, one team, and the
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other will go down in the ignominy of
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not having quite made it.
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It's a time of year when we think
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about winners and losers, kind of reflecting back
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on the past year.
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And I got to be honest, there's a
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set of awards that if I could pick
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any award to win, it would probably be
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one of these awards.
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And that's the Christianity Today Book Awards.
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So every year, in the first issue of
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the year, Christianity Today publishes their book awards
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for books published in the previous year.
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And this is like, you know, very niche,
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evangelical subculture stuff.
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There's different categories for like theology and ministry
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and evangelism and mission and other things.
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And I'm a writer, right?
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I write a blog.
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I've self-published a couple books, but I've
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never quote-unquote like legit published a book.
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And so this idea that maybe someday I
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would legit publish a book with some Christian
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press and it would be recognized and honored
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in the Christianity Today Book Awards, maybe even
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just as an honorable mention, then I really
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would have made it.
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Well, I can have this fantasy, this delusion
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of grandeur.
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It's just so nice to imagine Chris Easley's
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name on the pages of Christianity Today.
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Is there anything like that for you?
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If not, that's great.
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If you're just like so secure in your
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identity that you don't have any awards you
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aspire to, that's awesome.
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But if you could, if you could name
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like, what's that award that you would want
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to win?
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What would it be?
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Maybe it's an athletic achievement, winning a gold
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medal in your sport, or maybe at work
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being recognized in your workplace in some way,
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maybe with a formal award or just like
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achieving some specific project, maybe turning the corner
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on profitability if you're an enlist, like, you
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know, one of those Forbes 500, Forbes 1000,
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whatever it is, is there something where you're
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just like, Oh, yeah, my heart desires that.
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I think it can be really helpful for
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us to pay attention to those things that
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our hearts desire, because it's not bad for
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our hearts to desire things.
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But it can tell us something about our
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concept of self.
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And our concept of self can can really
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get in the way sometimes in our last
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episode, I talked about how hard it is
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to eat humble pie, how hard it is
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to admit it when we've done something wrong
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and fess up to it and move forward.
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It's so hard, but when we do it,
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it's so good.
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Why is it hard?
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Why is it so hard to eat that
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humble pie?
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Well, I want to look at this Christian
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virtue of humility again in this episode, but
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particularly look at why humility is so hard.
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Why is humility so hard?
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So first, a couple of clarifying things.
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One is to not misunderstand what we mean
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when we say humility.
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Humility is not about getting down on yourself.
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It's not about pretending to be worse at
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things than you really are.
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That would be false humility or false modesty.
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No, humility, to use a kind of an
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older Christian phrase, is simply the truth.
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Often this phrase is rendered as Latin, humilitas
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est veritas.
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Humility is truth.
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It's kind of one of those classical Christian
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phrases that crops up in different places, it's
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associated with different saints, sometimes attributed to St.
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Thomas Aquinas, but I love it because in
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its simplicity, it's powerful.
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Humility is truth.
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Humility is simply owning, recognizing, accepting the truth
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about who you are, your strengths and your
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weaknesses, your sins and the graces of God
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in your life.
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It's not about getting down on yourself.
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It's about just admitting the way things really
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are.
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There's a writer who I really appreciate named
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Arthur Brooks.
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He writes a lot about happiness and well
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-being.
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He also happens to be a devout Catholic
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and his kind of version of this humilitas
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est veritas, he put in a Facebook post
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about a year ago.
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He writes, humility is the full acceptance of
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the truth about ourselves.
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It is pure realism.
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Humility, not as self-hating, but as self
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-knowledge and acceptance, allows you to take off
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your mask.
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Pretension and image maintenance are extremely taxing work
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and demand a lot of energy.
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Truthfully saying, I don't know, not competing for
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first place in every social arena, and just
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being your imperfect self can be a huge
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load lifted from your shoulders.
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I love that quote.
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I particularly like when he says that humility
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is pure realism.
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Again, humilitas est veritas, humility is truth.
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We're just getting clearer about the way reality
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really is when we grow in the virtue
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of humility.
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Okay, but again, why is this so hard
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for us?
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Well, he gets at it a little bit.
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He talks about pretension and image maintenance.
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Again, we have this aspirational self, right?
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Well, it's not just that we aspire to
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the self, but also often we would like
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others to perceive us as this self.
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So there's the me I want to be,
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but there's also the me I want others
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to think I am.
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And we put a lot of energy into
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presenting that version of ourselves so that other
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people will think that we're better than we
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are.
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And I do this a lot.
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So I tend to be viewed as a
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very competent person.
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I feel like people count on me to
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get things done at work, at church, and
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other areas of my life.
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They're like, if we need to get it
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done, we can count on Chris to do
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it.
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That's great.
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I also happen to be a night owl.
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I tend to stay up late.
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And for whatever reason, in Western culture, those
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two things are often viewed as mutually exclusive.
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Like staying up late and sleeping in is
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irresponsible, while getting stuff done is responsible.
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I would tend to question whether that's true.
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But at any rate, because people have this
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assumption, I'm often dishonest with people about how
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much of a night owl I am, or
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at least I hide the truth, right?
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So if I stayed up till 1am watching
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a movie on Netflix on a Thursday night,
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which I've been known to do, right?
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I often don't mention that when I'm talking
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with people at church, right?
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Hey, what'd you do this weekend?
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I'm like, oh, I watched a movie.
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But I wouldn't be like, I watched a
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movie on Thursday night till 1am, because that
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would look irresponsible, right?
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I don't want people to think Chris is
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irresponsible, right?
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So that's just one kind of funny example
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of how I do this kind of image
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maintenance.
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And it takes energy, right?
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Because rather than just being transparent about who
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you are, and how you live, and the
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decisions you make, and the fact that you
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stay up till 1am watching Netflix movies sometimes,
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you have to kind of filter through like,
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how am I going to be perceived, etc,
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etc.
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So that's one reason that it's really hard
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to be humble, is that when we're humble,
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when we're honest about our strengths and our
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weaknesses, it kind of punctures that image maintenance
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project.
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It deflates the balloon of the false self
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that we're able to present to other people.
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And in that sense, we can kind of
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feel naked, we feel exposed.
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Well, I want to go to a Bible
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passage that talks about nakedness.
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This is that famous passage in Genesis 2
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and 3, right?
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So Genesis 2.25, And the man and
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his wife were both naked, and were not
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ashamed.
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That's a vision of life the way God
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intended it to be.
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Before sin, before the fall of humankind, before
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all of that destructive, corrupting spiritual influence got
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into us, Adam and Eve were naked, and
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were not ashamed.
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They were simply who they were, and had
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no reason to be ashamed.
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Okay, now, if you're tracking with me so
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far, there might be a question here, which
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is, okay, but what if there's a good
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reason to be ashamed about some of my
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weaknesses?
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Like, don't we believe that we're sinners, and
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so we need to repent of our sin?
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And so we wouldn't want to be like,
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you know, blasé about sins, you know, just
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say, you know, like, you wouldn't say that
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you like, you know, told a lie, sloppily,
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the same way you might say, you stayed
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up and watched Netflix till 1am, right?
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Oh, yeah, I lied to my wife about
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such and such.
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Like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's not okay.
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Like, you got to repent of that, right?
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So it can be hard to figure out,
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like, well, how do we, how do we
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be honest about our weaknesses, without being blasé,
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fair, or licentious about our sin?
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I think it's really helpful to look at
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kind of the contrast that Scripture draws here.
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Weakness and sin are definitely overlapping categories.
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It's not like there's this firm boundary between
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them, but they are kind of distinct in
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the way we can think about them.
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So let's look at 1 Corinthians chapter 10.
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This is Paul talking about how temptation feels
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when we face it, right?
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Verse 13, he says, No temptation has overtaken
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you, except what is common to mankind.
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And God is faithful.
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He will not let you be tempted beyond
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what you can bear.
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But when you are tempted, he will also
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provide a way out so that you can
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endure it.
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Okay, so this is good news.
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This is, when it comes to sin, God
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is always going to give us a way
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out.
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Now, that doesn't mean that we're perfect, right?
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We still do sin.
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We need to own up to our sin.
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But God is never going to condemn us
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to remain in sin forever.
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God promises a way out from sin.
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And in terms of deeply embedded patterns of
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sin, that can involve a lot of healing,
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a lot of long-term repentance and change.
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But that's the promise of God, is that
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we're not going to remain stuck in sin.
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Okay, but what about experiences that aren't necessarily
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sinful per se, but we experience them as
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weakness?
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Maybe as things that we wish were different
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about ourselves, but that aren't necessarily sinful.
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So for this, let's go to Paul's second
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letter to the Corinthians, 2 Corinthians chapter 12.
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Paul talks about an experience like this that
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he had.
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He called it a thorn in the flesh,
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right?
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He did not want to have this experience.
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He did not want to experience this particular
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kind of weakness.
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So starting in verse 8, three times I
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pleaded with the Lord about this, that it
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should leave me.
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But he said to me, my grace is
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sufficient for you, for my power is made
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perfect in weakness.
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Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly
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of my weaknesses, so that the power of
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Christ may rest upon me.
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For the sake of Christ, then I am
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content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities.
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For when I am weak, then I am
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strong.
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Okay, that's really counter-cultural.
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We don't have a weakness awards season in
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the United States.
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We don't give awards to people who experienced
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weaknesses and insults and hardships and calamities in
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the previous year.
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And yet Paul says he's content with those
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things.
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So this is really interesting.
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Paul says two very different things about temptations
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towards sin and the experience of weakness.
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On the one hand, he says, whenever you're
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tempted, God's going to provide a way out.
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God doesn't condemn you to stay in your
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sin.
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He's always going to help you, if you
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have sinned, repent, or if you're facing temptation,
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to endure it.
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But with weaknesses, God may not heal you
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of that weakness.
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God may not deliver you from it.
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He might let you continue to face that
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challenge.
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And the real Christian maturity we're invited into
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is to be content, even if that's the
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case.
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To be content with weaknesses, to be content
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with hardships, to not need to be stronger
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than we are.
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So I hope this can be helpful when
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we think about the question of shame, right?
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If you're feeling shame because you've done something
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wrong, that can be an appropriate emotional response.
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But then what is the appropriate emotional response?
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It's to own the wrong that you've done.
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We see this in Psalm 51, when David
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commits murder and adultery and he finally gets
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to a point of conviction and owning what
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he's done.
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What does he say?
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Verse 3, for I know my transgressions and
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my sin is ever before me.
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So he's naming his sin.
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He's getting honest about it.
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He's owning it.
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And then verse 6, behold, you delight in
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truth in the inward being and you teach
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me wisdom in the secret heart.
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Again, humilitas est veritas.
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It's humble, not for David to talk about
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sins he hasn't committed, but just to get
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honest about the ones he has committed.
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You delight in truth in the inward being.
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So if we have done something that's wrong,
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that it's right to be ashamed of, the
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solution is to name it and to repent
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of it and then to receive God's forgiveness
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for us, which then ultimately also delivers us
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from that experience of shame.
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But if we're experiencing weakness, there is no
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reason to be ashamed of our weaknesses.
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Paul says we can boast in our weaknesses
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because then that actually allows Christ's power to
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rest on us.
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And this is really hard for some of
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us to accept.
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This is really hard for me to accept
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because if our self-concept is based on
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being strong, we will be ashamed of our
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weakness, even if it's nothing to be ashamed
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of.
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If our self-concept is based on being
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strong, we will be ashamed of our weakness,
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even if it's nothing to be ashamed of.
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Let me give an example.
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When I was on staff at Church of
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the Resurrection in Wheaton, Illinois, that was my
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first job out of college, I had an
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administrative role and I worked closely with a
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leader named Deacon Val McIntyre.
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Some of my listeners might know of Deacon
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Val's ministry.
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It's called Transformation Intensive now.
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You can check it out, transformationintensive.org.
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It's all about Ignatian spirituality.
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I went through a version of it in
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2017, 2018.
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Changed my life.
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Super helpful.
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But what I wanted to talk about with
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Val was not her impressive leadership, although her
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leadership in ministries like Transformation Intensive was impressive,
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but rather the way that she just laughed
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at herself.
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She has this kind of funny, explosive, high
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-pitched laugh and it wouldn't be unusual in
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any given conversation for that laugh to just
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sort of emerge from Val and often talking
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about her own expense, like talking about some
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quirky thing she did or something she forgot
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to do, telling a story about how she
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messed something up.
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She was just shameless.
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She was unashamed to tell these stories about
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herself.
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And I remember as a 20-something recent
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college graduate just looking at her and being
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like, how do you do that?
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How do you laugh at yourself like that?
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Because I did not.
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I wanted to be presented as a competent,
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accomplished, spiritual person.
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And there was just a kind of freedom
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there that I saw in Val that I
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wanted to imitate.
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And one way that Val was really honest
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was about her experiences with mental health challenges.
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She would talk about how she would get
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medication that was really helpful in different seasons
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of her life.
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This was back before I had gotten any
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treatment for my depression.
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And again, it was like that hint of,
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oh, maybe I don't have to be ashamed
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to admit that I'm depressed.
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Maybe being depressed isn't a sin.
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Oh, maybe I can just laugh at myself
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and be aware of myself and accept myself.
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And maybe if a leader like Val can
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acknowledge that it's okay to get medication, maybe
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I could explore getting medication.
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You see how Val's example of humility gave
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me permission to accept my weaknesses, to simply
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be who I was.
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No more and no less.
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Humilitas est veritas.
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So the invitation for you in your workplace,
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like everywhere else, is to name the truth
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about your weaknesses.
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And this is so helpful in work relationships
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because you can't actually grow unless you're able
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to be honest about your weaknesses.
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So just real quick example.
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I do writing at my work.
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I write about what my colleagues at the
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food bank are doing in order to do
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fundraising for those programs.
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And we collaborate in my small team of
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seven on those writing projects, which means I'll
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have written something and then it'll go up
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on the screen and all of my coworkers
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will start critiquing it.
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You know, I'm not the biggest fan of
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that experience.
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Why?
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Because I feel ashamed.
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Part of my self-concept.
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Again, I want to win that Christianity Today
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honorable mention someday for a book that I
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may write in the future, right?
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I want to be viewed as a good
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writer.
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I want to put my writing up on
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the screen and everyone to just say, wow,
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Chris, that's great.
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It doesn't need to be changed at all.
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That's what I want.
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And yet, what's the only way for my
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writing to get better?
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The only way for my writing to get
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better is if I'm willing to take the
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feedback.
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If they're like, oh, this would actually be
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improved if you did it this way.
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If I'm able to not be defensive, if
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I'm able to just accept like, oh yeah,
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I'm not the world's best writer.
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I'm not a perfect writer.
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I'm not a writer who brings a draft
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that needs no revisions at all to a
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team meeting.
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Then I'm able to grow.
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Then I'm able to step into something more
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beautiful in the workplace.
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So just like in the rest of life,
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when we're able to be honest about our
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weaknesses, when we're able to, without shame, just
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own the truth about who we are, strengths
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and weaknesses, sins and the graces that God
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has given to us, that's a gift to
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the people around us at work.
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Humilitas est veritas.
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Lord Jesus, thank you for this invitation to
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humility.
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Show us how to lean into it.
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Show us how to name the truth as
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hard as it is about our strengths and
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our weaknesses.
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Help us to find our home in you
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so that we don't need to be ashamed.
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Jesus, do your work in us as we
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do our work with you.
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Thanks for listening.
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