Latest / The Bridges and Beacons Podcast / Mystic Nerd Squad Podcast Episode 2: Empath Holiday Guide with Tricia Dycka

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Mystic Nerd Squad Podcast Episode 2: Empath Holiday Guide with Tricia Dycka · The Bridges and Beacons Podcast

• 0:37
  SPEAKER_01: Go for 20 to 30 minutes today.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_01: Good evening.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: I am checking on my Facebook feed to see if we are coming through live.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_01: Let's refresh that.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_01: There we are.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_01: We are there.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_01: So this is where the real intro begins.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_01: This is live broadcasting at its best.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_01: So there are going to be snafus, and I welcome them because it just makes life more interesting.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_01: So it's so true, right?
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to the second episode of the Mystic Nerd Squad podcast, where I host candid conversations for the curious.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_01: If you're listening, you are the curious and you're in the right spot.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_01: Tonight's conversation is going to be thrilling, and I say that for myself personally as an empath, but I have the lovely Trisha Dica here with me.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_01: Trisha is an intuitive empath coach, Reiki master, bestselling author, teacher, and speaker.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_01: Her mission is to help other empath coaches and healers go from emotional overwhelm to learning how to manage their own energy so they can be more visible and experience inner peace.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds amazing.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_01: And I say that having spent many, many years as an overwhelmed empath.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: So thank you for coming on and welcome.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: I have spent many, many years myself as an overwhelmed empath.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I would say most of my adult life, I had no idea.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: So it has been a journey, journey.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_01: It's a journey, and sometimes there's no snacks.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: I love it.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_01: And you're like, why is all this traffic here?
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: What is going on?
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_01: So for those of you who are listening, I'm gonna ask the first question of Trisha.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_01: How would you describe an empath?
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_01: How would somebody know if they're an empath?
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: Um, okay, so about 10 years ago, more than that now, my whole life imploded.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: It was like I was a hot mess and just hysterics and sobbing uncontrollably.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I had no idea.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember saying, you know, speaking to God, universe, source energy, whatever you guys talk to.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what is this?
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: Because I'm done, and this cannot be me for the rest of my life.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: Like it went on for months and months and months.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: This wasn't just it started in September and it went well into past January of the new year of this uncontrollable sobbing.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: And that's all the emotions that I picked up throughout my whole life and had no idea that were just pouring out.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: And tears are very cleansing, guys.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: Tears are so good for you.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, as an empath, we try to hide our sensitivity and hide those that crying.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: Now I don't care.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just gonna cry.
• 3:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna cry.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, empath is somebody who feels things emotionally, physically, and mentally.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then I try to say it's all encompassed in your spirituality.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like, how do you view yourself?
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: How do you view being an empath?
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: And there's so many ways that we can be affected.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_00: There's you know, a lot of people just notice that they become overwhelmed so easily, they're in large places and it bothers them.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: We're coming into the holidays, and I know things are opening up, and you've got malls, right?
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: So I don't go there.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: I I do, I do.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but when when I when I first started, you know, realizing what was going on, I remember that Christmas going into the mall.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: Literally, I'm not, I kid you not, I walked in the mall, turned around in tears, just pouring.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: I walked in fine, and I was hysterical within two minutes, and I just walked right back out.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: My husband just followed.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: He was like, Okay, we're done.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: And I I couldn't take it.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: So large, large people.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: But the more that you become accustomed to your gifts and your empath, your that piece of you, you know you don't go to malls if you're not in tip top shape.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: You don't go to places like New York City unless you're in tip top shape.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_00: Because I've been there and now as I look back, it makes sense.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: So, so we tend to pick things up, you just feel it from other people.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: You could know them, you could not.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: It can be a collective basis.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um, like I was and just happened to be I was at a mall, and it was fine.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: And I was walking, and all of a sudden I was like, one more step, I'm gonna fall because my whole my hip went out, and I'm like, oh my God.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: So I I remember thinking, you know, this isn't mine, you know, we'll pick up other people's tiredness, your headaches.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um, just that not, and if we're aware of our own energy and our own bodies, when you get it, it's like that.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: And you're like, all right, I just got something, whatever it is, you know, and just let it flow through you.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: Feel it, be aware of it, acknowledge it, and just let it go.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: And through my journey, I have truly become to realize that the happier I am, and the more that I'm really engaged in my own life, it just flows right through me.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: I'll feel it, but it does not affect me as a person.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I love that distinction.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I really do.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: And I've been following you for a little while now, and that is one of my favorite things that I've learned from you is that to kind of let things blow through you.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I love that because I always felt like I'm supposed to put up some sort of a wall and like, you know, banish things from my space, and it's just not practical, first of all, to kind of operate where you're just you know not letting people in, but it's just not practical going into the world.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_01: You're going to be around people with, okay, so we we could say negative or bad vibes or whatever you want to say, but to be able to operate and have that distinction of this is mine, it's not mine, but no matter what it is, it can just flow through me.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_01: It doesn't have to settle inside me for me to be experiencing it.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_01: And that was really truly transformative for me.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: And I find myself remembering what did Trisha say?
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, I'm gonna just like let I think you said you let it blow through your heart.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_01: And just that beautiful imagery has been so meaningful for me personally.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I'm I'm glad you you brought that up.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people, when I first realized I was an empath, everybody said put surround yourself in bubbles, white lights, you know, only let positive in, don't let negative stuff in.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then I would have empaths come to me and say, I'm depleted, I'm tired, because you're constantly putting up and making sure that you're covered.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_00: You are you're afraid of these negative energies, you don't want to feel them.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: And I get it, you know, I really do.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_00: Like, who does, you know?
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: But the reality of it is you've got a plethora of emotions in the world.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: And when you put up a block or a shield because you don't want to feel something, you're saying to the universe, this is what I'm focusing on, send me more.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: So, what I do is this is what you're talking about, the heart-centered intention, is I imagine my heart center open and clear and moving with a gentle breeze coming through me all day long, clearing out anything that does not belong to me.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: Now, here's the caveat.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_00: I also bring in the universe or the earth, whichever you prefer, and send those emotions there so that they're doing the heavy lifting, they're doing the cleansing, the clearing, the healing.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: So everything comes through us.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's like we're the cleaners, but the true energetic cleaning of all of this is the earth and the universe.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I can't tell you how many times I love this story.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_00: It's a sad story, but I do it's so it really shows, it showcases an empath.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: My husband and I were um doing bottle returns, and we were out at um the store, bottle returns, and the place is packed.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: So we're standing next to each other doing bottles, and this woman comes in, taps me on the shoulder, and says, I need to tell you a story.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, Oh, okay, you know, like and my husband stops because he figures I know this girl.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and she goes, I felt this need to come in here, I saw you, and she tells me this terrible story, and all I could say is how sorry I was for her.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: And she touches my arm and says, Thank you so much, I feel so much better, and leaves.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: Meanwhile, the whole place stops to hear what's going on.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: And my husband's like, You didn't know her?
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, No, no, but I felt her heaviness, but I was open to it, and it just flowed through me.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: And in some way, I helped her because she said to me, I feel so much better, thank you so much.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: And and it, you know, um, it happens all the time, especially at the supermarkets.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know why the supermarkets, um, although I do, you know, have random people all the time come up to me, spill their guts, tell me their life story, and walk away.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: And they will say, I don't understand why I told you that, but thank you.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_01: That's amazing.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, and that really speaks to how you know being an empath can be a gift, it doesn't have to feel like a curse.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: It it does.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, like there are days, though, I will tell you, when I go to the supermarket and I'll say to the universe before I walk in, I don't have patience.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't sleep well last night.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: You know, help me.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_00: And I kind of almost like say, you know, like I'm very intentional.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: And I think empaths just allow it to plop right on them.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: If you're intentional about exactly what you want, what you're looking for, and how you want to go about it, you're gonna get it.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_00: So when I say, all right, universe, today is not the day for conversations at the at the store.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: I want to go in and I want to leave.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what happens, you know.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: So I also have to, you know, create those boundaries for myself along with the universe.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_00: So we're creating those boundaries, which kind of segues awesomely into the holidays and creating boundaries for the holidays.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: I know.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: I was I was thinking to myself before we came on, I was like, do I start this off by singing a Christmas carol?
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_01: Or you know, but I'm thinking, you know, we're we're we are here in the holiday season.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not sure how we got here this fast, but we're in the holiday season, we've got Thanksgiving coming up.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: So many people very likely did not see their uh their loved ones or some of the people they usually spend time with last year because most of us were quarantining.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: And so how do we proceed with caution into the holidays?
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: Uh oh, did I lose you, Tricia?
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_01: You froze on me.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_01: All right, I'm gonna give you a second to try and refresh.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_01: Let's see.
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_01: All right, we're gonna take a quick little break right here, and hopefully Trisha is gonna pop back on.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_01: I think she lost a bit of her feed.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_01: So this will be our commercial break uh for the Mystic Nerd Squad podcast while my friend Trisha Dica gets herself reconnected.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_01: Um so hang in there, my friends.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_01: So while you're watching, those of you that are watching, if you could go ahead and comment, I'm I'm broadcasting from StreamYard into Facebook.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_01: And there you should be able to comment, and then it's gonna pop up on my screen, even though I'm not actively on Facebook.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, here we go.
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_01: Hello, my internet just went down.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, listen, it is not a problem.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_01: These things happen.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_01: I knew I was like, yep, there she she has this gorgeous smile on her face and she's not moving.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_01: I told you this is live.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, this is live TV, but you you are back.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: So you were just about to launch into how we're gonna handle the holidays if we if we find ourselves being an empath.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: And you said the B-word, boundaries.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_01: So let's kick off from there.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: Now, boundaries are in in everything.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it's we tend to say yes to everything when it comes to the holidays.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_00: And since last year we were so, you know, stuck in the house due to COVID, and now everything's opening up this year.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody's rushing around.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: They are doing flights, they're they're going above and beyond.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's like they want to make up for it last year, which is awesome.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I want everybody to have a good time.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_00: However, we tend to deplete ourselves that by the time January comes, we need a vacation, which is not good.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_00: It's not good.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_00: Or how about this?
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_00: How many holidays did you sit like a zombie on the couch for like two days straight because you couldn't function?
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_00: And it's the overeating, it's eating foods that our bodies are not used to, very heavy sauces, and and we tend to overeat, we gorge.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: And then the alcohol, because you know, you don't want to deal with negative Aunt Nancy, right?
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_00: Or you don't want to deal with those um questions that come to you that really shouldn't be asked, or um you're around people you just don't want to be around.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: That's a huge, huge energy leak.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: That's not managing your energy.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_00: And unfortunately, I believe a lot of the holidays are based on traditions from dead people.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_00: I really do believe that.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and I'm really focusing this year on talking to as many empaths about creating their own traditions this year, something that's fun, something that's easy.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, we tend to go way overboard with our clothes, with the hair, with the nails, like everything has to be perfect.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_00: My house has to be perfect.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_00: I recently spoke to somebody, and they're like, Oh my god, my house has to be perfect for Thanksgiving.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: We're doing this, we're doing that, but I'm inviting people that just don't get along and it's already sucking the life out of me.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I went, Oh no, that's like putting a red flag in front of a bull.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it's not easy saying no, it's not easy putting your foot down, it's not easy prioritizing and putting yourself first.
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_00: It's just not.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_00: So if you could do some small things for yourself this year, you know, I mean, a great idea would be to have a function at your house, invite the people you want, and also have your friends.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: So this way you're still having a little bit of your tradition with your family, plus you know, your friends and creating something new.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we tend to want to force ourselves to be around family because that's what society says.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, it's family, you have to spend the holidays with them.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_00: But I have a question.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: Would you ever be friends with them?
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_01: That's such a good question.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm sure there are people who are like, ooh, maybe not.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I did it.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_00: Like I remember um a lot of extended family.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I would never be friends with you, and I'm tired of your drama and toxicity, and I cut it off.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_00: Um, is it easy?
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_00: Oh God, guys, I'd love to tell you that it is, but it's also not easy.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: No, it's actually cutting off.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: And now you're dealing with all the other family members going, I can't believe you, who are you?
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: Blah, blah, blah.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_00: Now you're hearing from the other side of it, the other people.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I still, you know, my mom's like, I can't believe, why aren't you seeing them?
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: Why no, no, no.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: I I need to do what's best for myself.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_00: And as an empath, we need to look where our energy is going, where our time is going, where our efforts are going.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_00: And if it's not making you happy, and I'm not saying, you know, people are like, oh, now that's being selfish, but it's really not because you're taking care of yourself.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: You're prioritizing yourself, you're putting yourself first.
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so that's really, really big, I think.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and boundaries are simple as saying no, no to the the food choices, no to the alcohol or less alcohol and more water.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, no to running yourself ragged, running yourself ragged for gifts, running yourself ragged in malls.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_00: You know, my gosh, yeah.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_01: The spending.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_00: The spending.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: People overspend to make up, you know, and I gotta tell you, uh, my list is very small now.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: It has really chopped down because I would be buying for 20 people.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_00: Plus all the people that would stop by that you wanted to make sure you had a gift for, or you know, um, you're you're forcing yourself into a thing that you think you need to do.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're not honoring yourself, that's big.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_01: It's really and it's not the really the spirit of the season, no matter what holiday you're celebrating.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_01: The spirit is, you know, Thanksgiving is about giving thanks.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_01: It's gratitude.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_01: So if you're spending your hard-earned time with people for whom you don't enjoy spending time with, then that's not really that's not a Thanksgiving honoring that tradition.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_00: No, not at all.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: And then when people are already when you're already stressing now about your perfect food, your perfect table, it's gotta look a certain way.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_00: In what aspect of any of this are you honoring your authentic self?
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_00: No, you know, um, I used to rush out and have to buy the outfits that you know, the Christmas outfits, the Thanksgiving outfits now, sweatpants or jeans, depending on what I'm doing, if I'm staying home or where I'm going, but it's pretty much sweatpants and jeans.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: I am a jeans and t-shirts kind of girl.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_00: That is me, and that is that's it.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_00: Like so the holidays, that's what I am.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: When we force ourselves into roles that we're not accustomed to, we drain our energy because we're trying to be put on a show, put on a face.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_00: That's you know, oh my god, you got to wear your makeup, you gotta do your hair.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_00: And it's and guys, there always is, I guess, like weddings, that's great for.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_00: But these are supposed to be fun times for you.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: You're supposed to be enjoying them with people you love.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_00: If you can't stand the people eating at your dinner table, that's a problem.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_00: Or you're going to somebody's house and you can't stand the people there.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_00: That's a problem.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I and I get it because I remember the first few times that I said no, I was like, oh my God, oh my god, oh my god.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_00: But I got better.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_00: I got better.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: And the more I honored myself and didn't do all of these things, the more I'm like, wow, I love it.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_00: I love, you know, cooking and you know, being home and and making.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever food and dessert that I want and not catering to anybody but myself.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like I'm creating a holiday around my wants, my desires, things that make me happy and my husband happy.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_00: And you want people there who are doing the same.
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: So I know it's not easy.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_00: Like we tend to um want to run out and go to parties.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_00: And here's the thing with empaths, you're in a group full of people.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_00: You're going to a party because holiday parties are ramping up.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_00: They're drinking and they're eating.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: So their inhibitions are, forget it.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_00: Their emotions are all over the place.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_00: Don't put yourself in a position where you are totally drained.
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_00: If you need to leave after a half an hour of being there, then honor that.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_00: People are like, oh no, I can't.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_00: I got to stay till dessert, or I got to stay till this.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_00: No, no.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_00: The the heart-centered intention will help you tremendously.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_00: Make sure you're grounded before you do any of these things, you know.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and something real quick and easy is if you have um a problem, you can go in the bathroom.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: Water is water is a great cleanser and it is a great grounder.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_00: So washing your hands and kind of being like, all right, I'm getting rid of all this energy.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_00: But it comes back to again, are you going to force yourself to stay in an uncomfortable situation or were you going to leave?
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's really, really, really important for the holidays to do this because I can't tell you how many times I was that person on the couch for days after Christmas when it was all done.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: And forget New Year's, I wasn't going out, I wasn't touching it, you know.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_00: But after Christmas, I'd be like days not moving.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that burnout of the holidays.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_01: I can definitely relate to the you know, overindulgence piece, the eating foods that you really shouldn't be eating, drinking too much, you know, staying up too late.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I know for me, anytime I get I lose that homeostasis of like good sleep, good nutrition, you know, taking care of myself, giving myself breaks and rest and time away.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I I know you're the same as me.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I really need my alone time and quiet time to just and the holidays can get so ramped up that you lose that.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_01: But you can't lose that.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: No, I don't.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_00: No, I don't either anymore.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_00: I I do not, you know.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: Um it's a choice.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's a choice that you have to make to prioritize yourself first.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: If you're not, if you're tired, you're not feeling well, the last thing you need to be doing is going into a mall.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_00: Or the last thing you need to be doing is staying at somebody's house till 12, 1, 2 in the morning because it's the holidays.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_00: Like if you're there an hour and you're totally done, you need to get up and say, Thank you, but I need to leave now.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to sit there and make excuses either, because we all tend to immediately go to what's an acceptable excuse so that I can excuse myself.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I had a great time.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for inviting me.
• 27:17
  SPEAKER_00: It's time for me to leave.
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_01: And you don't owe anybody an explanation.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_00: Because your mind goes like, how do I get out of this?
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_00: And and let's say you're going with your significant other or a friend or whatever.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_00: Have a keyword and just say, you know, um, oh, I think it's Fokker's Muskrat.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_00: Um, during the movie, it was muskrat.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_00: Sit that into the conversation.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: You know, have a keyword or or have something that you both understand that I'm done, I need to go, and this is over.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_00: You know, so um I do that with my husband, and he does it with me.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like when we're someplace and he's had enough, he's like, okay, you know, and and we're in tune with each other to know that it's just time to go, you know.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_00: So that's really good to do as well.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and it's really, like you said, it's so important.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_00: Overeating, eating heavy foods, because the problem is your body is struggling to digest all the food it's not used to, whether it's good or not, is irrelevant.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_00: When it's struggling to digest all that food, now you've got all those other emotions coming at you, and your body cannot also process that.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_00: So you're having now your energy is just being drained.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_00: So take care of yourself mentally, physically, and emotionally, so that whatever's going on around the world, around your environment, is gonna go right through you.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_00: We create that bottleneck by doing all of these things.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_00: And our body's saying, All right, well, I'm done.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_00: I can't do this and this.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_00: So you, you know, and I have to do this because you have to digest or has to get rid of the alcohol, you know, so it's gonna do those things.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_00: Or you've run yourself all the way up to Christmas so badly, run yourself down that your body is just trying to give you energy to make it through the day.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_00: So you're gonna pick up all these emotions and you're gonna feel them because your energy drops, your vibration and frequency drop, and you're gonna pick up more.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_01: That that feels very familiar to a younger version of myself.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_01: That I, you know, the the perfect setup, the perfect outfit, the perfect gifts.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_01: It's like, you know, I don't know what the what the correlation is between being an empath and a people pleaserslash perfectionist, but I just can say that I fit into that category.
• 29:59
  SPEAKER_01: So like all of that interplay.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_01: And, you know, it's been a few years.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_01: I have a lot of significant food allergies.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_01: So I've been pretty good about food for a while, but like making the switch from like being with people to focus versus the food to focus was a big switch for me.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_01: But that helped and the the not overindulging because it's like it takes too long to recover.
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it does.
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_00: It takes too long to recover and get your energy levels back up.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_00: You see, but here's the thing while you're recovering, you're still picking up emotions, it doesn't stop.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's like a 24-7 gig, guys.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_00: You know, people are like, I'm home and still feel overwhelmed.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_00: And emotions are energy and motion.
• 30:48
  SPEAKER_00: You could be in the four walls of your house and you're still gonna pick this up.
• 30:53
  SPEAKER_00: So when you're thinking about that, how are you going to prioritize?
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_00: What self-care rituals are you gonna make sure that you are gonna do even more so during the holidays?
• 31:04
  SPEAKER_00: I know.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_00: Say no, say no, say no, create a new tradition, you know.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it's not people find, you know, empaths are big people pleasers.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_00: They're big in taking on everybody else's stuff, they want to help.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_00: And again, it's also at the expense of yourself and your health and your sleep and your mental and emotional well-being.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_00: And you're gonna keep that up until one day your body's like, okay, well, I've had enough.
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_00: Now, now you've picked up some kind of cold or something where you're in bed.
• 31:43
  SPEAKER_00: And hopefully it's it's as simple as a cold, and it's not something else where your body is really like shutting itself down because it's like, yeah, I had enough.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like years ago in my in my 30s, I ended up with a bad, bad kidney infection that went septic, and it was like a year.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_00: So it was like my body was like, All right, well, I gave you your sign, I gave you, you know, it's that awareness, yeah, that awareness of your energy.
• 32:11
  SPEAKER_00: If you don't know your energy, here's a great tool.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's the empath symbol.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_00: Um, mine's a bear, you can pick something, and basically, all you're doing is asking the universe to show you your bear when what you're feeling does not belong to you.
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_00: So um, it can and it could be flowers, animals, mammals, fish, instruments, places.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and and basically it's being open, it's getting off that hamster wheel and starting to notice your body, what it's trying to tell you, and paying attention to the signs the universe is giving you.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_00: And the universe is very inventive.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_00: There was um one day, it was several years ago, I was I was at work, I was rushing, I was rushing all day because because I didn't have time to do my rituals that morning.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_00: So it was like I just jumped on the hamster wheel all day long.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember almost getting in a car accident too that night.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I ended up behind this car, and their license plate said, bear with me.
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I went, oh good God.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_00: So the universe is showing you.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_00: Like I will get bears on license plates on the back of cars, um, randomly emailed to me uh on the internet.
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_00: It it's the universe is definitely showing you, it's about you being aware enough and stepping back off of that wheel to move forward slower.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_00: When we step off that wheel, it's like everything just kind of falls into place.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: And that's when we understand immediately, like this symbol is great, but as you got know your energy, you won't even need the symbol anymore.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_00: Because you're just gonna be like, all right, yep, I I picked something up, I know it.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_00: I was, you know, and you just kind of replay your day a little bit, and you're gonna see how you were not paying any attention to what was going on, the signals your body's telling you, like there are knots where there's resistance, where there are feelings within your body.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I have a certain spot, it's I I just know this spot.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_00: When it goes like this, I'm like, uh-oh.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_00: What am I missing?
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_00: What did I miss?
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_00: You know?
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, and and people say a lot about resistance, like you're not doing something, or you it's it's a mindset issue, or it's I don't know.
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_00: Anyway, resistance for me as an empath is telling me something's wrong.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_00: You're not supposed to be here, you're not supposed to be doing this.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and and it's as I look back through the years and see this resistance, it makes sense.
• 34:59
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're coming into the holidays and you're feeling a lot of resistance, I want you to step back and ask yourself, is this really what I'm supposed to be doing?
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_00: Is this really something I want to be doing?
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_00: Forget the rest of the world, forget tradition, forget your family, and just start asking yourself.
• 35:16
  SPEAKER_00: And unfortunately, they're self-reflected questions.
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, they may be sometimes to see the answers, or you're seeing them, but you just don't want to take the actions.
• 35:26
  SPEAKER_00: But check in with that, check in with your body, check in with that resistance and ask yourself, why am I being have you ever?
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_00: And and Tech Kelly tell me this.
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_00: Have you ever gone to go do a go to a party or a function or a family function and your body's like, hell no?
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_00: And you get there and you're like, I just should have stayed home.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah, definitely.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, where you've committed to something.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, I definitely have like the like overcommitment hangover, like, oh my God, I said yes way too many times, and I don't want to do this.
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_01: Um, yeah, it doesn't feel good.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_00: No, and sometimes it's also your higher self-god universe trying to get you out of whatever's about to go down.
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I love that you brought over overcommitment because that's huge for the holidays.
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_00: We overcommit to everything.
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't care if you said yes.
• 36:22
  SPEAKER_00: If you're if it's time to go and your body's like, oh, I I would rather just put pajamas on and watch TV, cancel.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_00: Cancel.
• 36:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_00: Like I used to be the go girl, the extroverted, empathic, go, go, go, go, girl.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_00: I ignored the pieces within me that said I needed the downtime, I needed my recharge time.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_00: So now, even though I say yes to something, because I'm fully intending on going and it sounds like a fun thing, and when it comes up and that day just wasn't a good day for me, I need to cancel.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 36:58
  SPEAKER_00: And and let it go.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_00: You know, thank you for the invite, but I'm unable to make it and I know it's last minute, you know.
• 37:07
  SPEAKER_00: Stop making excuses and just allow yourself to be completely embodied in your own energy without worrying about anybody else.
• 37:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 37:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that's hard because I I can say for myself, like in the past, if I were to do that, I I would be able to sense the other person's disappointment.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_01: Like it just didn't feel good to me.
• 37:34
  SPEAKER_01: Whereas, you know, now I feel like I'm like, they get to be disappointed, but I still get to cancel.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_01: Like it's okay.
• 37:42
  SPEAKER_01: But that that has taken a lot of work and a lot of time to overcome that and to not feel like I just don't want anybody to feel hurt or disappointed.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_01: And, you know, they might be just having a bad day, or they might not even be thinking that.
• 37:55
  SPEAKER_01: That might be my projection of what they might be feeling.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 38:00
  SPEAKER_00: But here's here's the the ultimately the thing comes down to over and over and over again is you.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna force yourself to go and then what's gonna happen.
• 38:10
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna force yourself to go and then what's gonna happen.
• 38:13
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we are so quick to be like, yeah, and we're so worried about everybody else's feelings.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm not saying don't be.
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm saying worry about yourself first.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_00: Worry about your own body, your own healing, your own, you know, energy and vibration and frequency.
• 38:32
  SPEAKER_00: Worry about that first.
• 38:33
  SPEAKER_00: And if it's a go, then go.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I know for me to go into New York City, it's not a constant, you know.
• 38:42
  SPEAKER_00: I have to be in tip-top shape, meaning I need a good night's sleep.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_00: I need to do my rituals, I need to be intentional about where I'm going and what I'm doing.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_00: And uh, I really need to make sure my body is open and I need to make sure I'm hydrated because walking through New York City is walking through tons and tons and tons of people.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_00: So if I'm not at that level, I will cancel going into the city because that's that's not a game for me.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_00: But it's the same thing with that thought process that I do with everything going to the malls, going to you know, stadiums.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_00: You could go to a ball game, and it's usually high emotion.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_00: People are excited, they're raring to go, but at the same time, it's all those people, and now they lose a game.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_00: And what happens?
• 39:32
  SPEAKER_00: Disappointment, you know, fighting.
• 39:34
  SPEAKER_00: So you're picking all that up.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_00: So, again, how do you feel before you go there?
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_00: You know, people don't realize these small things, and they don't, we're so worried about hurting people's feelings and disappointing people that we put ourselves last.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, I learned a long time ago that does not do anybody any good.
• 39:58
  SPEAKER_00: The only person you can worry about is yourself, and yeah, you you want other people to be happy and enjoy themselves too.
• 40:08
  SPEAKER_00: Again, you know, your presence or their lack of should not affect their level of happiness.
• 40:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, definitely.
• 40:17
  SPEAKER_01: And you know what?
• 40:18
  SPEAKER_01: It just brings up for me, it's we're each on our own journey.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_01: So it's not really for us to do the work for other people.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_01: So they might need to go through that to figure out what they need to work on on themselves.
• 40:33
  SPEAKER_01: So if we all just manage ourselves and our own path and journey and well-being, then you know, that's all we have to do.
• 40:41
  SPEAKER_01: We don't have to worry about other people.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_00: No, we don't.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_00: We we worry about making our us ourselves the best and then showing up in the world that way.
• 40:52
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 40:52
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I can go crazy for the holidays and be at every function and do all of these things.
• 41:00
  SPEAKER_00: And now I've run myself down, but that doesn't make anybody else happier.
• 41:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's just a level of expectation that they expect you there.
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_00: You can expect me here, but it's just not a good fit for me tonight.
• 41:13
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, you got to realize too, you're dealing with their expectations.
• 41:17
  SPEAKER_00: And like you said, which is a really great point.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody has their own stuff to work on, whether they're aware of it or not.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_00: It's not for us to show them, it is for them to deal with.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_00: And if they are upset with you, have an open conversation about it.
• 41:31
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you're upset with me.
• 41:34
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I you know, I appreciate the invite, but I was unable to make it, you know.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_00: You know, and sometimes be open about the empath, explain that piece to people.
• 41:45
  SPEAKER_00: Um, some people get it and other people don't, and that's okay too.
• 41:51
  SPEAKER_00: So it's it's not it's not even something like I remember having conversations with my husband, and so now he gets it.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I'll just say a few things, you know.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_00: I'll say, I'm overwhelmed today, hon.
• 42:02
  SPEAKER_00: I had a bad day, I did not do the things I was supposed to do, did not take care of myself.
• 42:09
  SPEAKER_00: And he'll be like, All right, so what do you need?
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_00: You know, and I'll be like, I'll tell him what I need, whether it's hiding in the bedroom, taking a bath with beds and stool, it's just a hug, you know.
• 42:19
  SPEAKER_00: But then there are people that I've told it to and they don't understand it, they don't grasp it, and that's okay too.
• 42:28
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I agree with you.
• 42:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 42:31
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_01: These are such great pieces of advice, probably through the whole year, but especially, yeah, especially during the holidays.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_01: So um I hope everybody watching and listening has taken these tips to heart, especially if you find yourself an empath, setting those boundaries, you know, whether it's boundaries with how you're spending your time, the food you're eating, beverages, overcommitment, overspending, anything in the overzone, we should just probably say, don't go over, just stay in a neutral zone and prioritize yourself, you know, because if you're an empath, you probably have a pretty important purpose in this lifetime.
• 43:16
  SPEAKER_01: And if you're completely burned out, you're not available for that purpose.
• 43:20
  SPEAKER_01: And the universe is counting on us, right?
• 43:23
  SPEAKER_01: So I just want to thank you, Trisha, from the bottom of my heart.
• 43:27
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I would love to have you back anytime and to talk more about MPAS life and how we get into that state of enjoying inner peace.
• 43:37
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I hope you have a wonderful and relaxing holiday in your pajamas on your couch watching TV.
• 43:44
  SPEAKER_01: If that's what you still choose to do, I wouldn't be upset if you canceled plans with me.
• 43:50
  SPEAKER_01: Because you'd be on the couch with me.
• 43:52
  SPEAKER_01: I I spoiler alert, I was totally thinking I just want people to come over in their sweatpants and be comfortable and and like feel like they can come in my house and and just sit on the couch and be cozy.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_01: I I have very like low expectations.
• 44:09
  SPEAKER_01: I love some Christmas lights, I love my Christmas tree, I love a little bit of holiday treats, you know, minimal amount, but just being together and enjoying peace and quiet is probably more my vibe for the holidays, too.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I totally agree.
• 44:25
  SPEAKER_00: Totally.
• 44:27
  SPEAKER_00: So enjoy.
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_00: Enjoy, and here's just one more thing.
• 44:31
  SPEAKER_00: Sure.
• 44:32
  SPEAKER_00: Always comes up when you go somewhere where you are forcing yourself to go, and you have those family members who feel it is okay to ask you any question.
• 44:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, you have boundaries, you respect yourself, and that does not mean that you are there to be disrespected by somebody else.
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_00: So be kind and you don't have to respond.
• 45:03
  SPEAKER_00: You do not have to respond, especially if it is something that you are unwilling to let the world to know.
• 45:10
  SPEAKER_01: So that's my last, my last tidbit for the day.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_01: That's that is a great piece of advice.
• 45:16
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much.
• 45:17
  SPEAKER_01: You know, you don't you have permission to stay silent and to walk away if you if you're not feeling comfortable.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's great to practice ahead of time in the mirror, I think.
• 45:29
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I agree.
• 45:31
  SPEAKER_01: This is my no, we're not talking about that face, and this is me turning and walking away.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, absolutely.
• 45:40
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much.
• 45:41
  SPEAKER_01: Happy holidays.
• 45:42
  SPEAKER_01: Enjoy your Thanksgiving and all the other wonderful holidays.
• 45:46
  SPEAKER_01: I hope it's very peaceful and tranquil for you.
• 45:50
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and thank you for joining us on the Mystic Nerd Squad podcast.
• 45:54
  SPEAKER_01: We'll see you next time.
• 45:56
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 45:56
  SPEAKER_01: Bye.
• 45:57
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.