Latest / 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids. / Interview with Bonica Brown, Author of Roses & Honeysuckle: Finding God in the Midst of an Ordinary Life

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Interview with Bonica Brown, Author of Roses & Honeysuckle: Finding God in the Midst of an Ordinary Life · 5–Minute Parenting: Tips to Help You Raise Competent, Godly Kids.

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to another episode of the Five Minute Parenting Podcast.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_01: I'm your host, Karen Ferguson, wife, mom, grandmom, and children's book author, with a background in K-A education and a passion for equipping parents to raise confident and god-confident kids.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_01: In this podcast, we'll cover parenting practices from both a practical view and a biblical view.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_01: Our goal is to help you raise kids with a positive, godly self-image so they can become all they were created to be.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: I know you're busy, so we'll keep it short.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_01: Let's take just five minutes and dive in.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to another episode of Five Minute Parenting.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: I'm Karen, your show host, and today I have a very special guest, fellow ambassador author Bonica Brown, who'll be sharing about her beautiful book, Roses and Honeysuckle: Finding God in the Midst of an Ordinary Life.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_01: Bonica is a pastor's wife, mother of four, writer, artist, photographer, graphic designer, and children's pastor.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_01: Together, she and her husband of 14 years serve as pastors at First PCG in Fort Gibson, Oklahoma.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: A lifelong writer, Bonica recently published her debut book, Roses and Honeysuckle, a heartfelt story that reflects her love for storytelling.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_01: Deeply grateful for her family and faith, she strives to live a life of thankfulness and simplicity while inspiring others with her journey.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_01: Bonica, welcome to the show.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_01: I am super excited to highlight your book today.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_01: I have my copy right here, and it's full of inspiration and encouragement for moms.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_01: It's real, it's heartfelt, it's beautifully written, and it's about things that I would say every mom can relate to.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: When I was reading it, I felt like I was sitting down with a friend, you know, talking about ordinary life with these glimpses of beauty and hope and redemption throughout.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_01: It's really so good.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_01: And I highly recommend it to our listeners.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_01: But, you know, I'm gonna just let you jump right in and share your story, share the book, and then anything else you'd like to share with our listeners today.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, thank you so much.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: So um I wrote that book kind of as a way to heal um in the process of grieving.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: My mother had passed away in 2020.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_00: And um as a young mom with four kids, it was a huge life change because I had a built-in babysitter, I had a support system, I had um just everything that a mom is going for me.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_00: And then when she passed away, it was suddenly like my life completely changed to not single parenting, but parenting on our own, me and my husband.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: And it was just a it was a hard, it was a hard season.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I think uh through through that season, I didn't realize how hard it was.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: And about a year later, I just I felt like God was saying, you need to write it down, you need to get everything that's in your heart and in your head out and put it on paper.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: And so I just kind of sat down and started writing, and I didn't realize I had so much in me that just needed to be released, and so it was definitely writing this book was a way of healing, but also as I was writing, I realized that other people go through similar things that I'm not alone, and so I wanted to encourage other moms that were in similar seasons, um, not just in grief, but in the season of raising small children and just having everybody in diapers and um just the struggles of small children and having no time to yourself and being busy constantly and needed constantly.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: Um, a lot has changed since those four years because my kids have grown older and they're more independent, and we've developed more support systems.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_00: But um I guess it was just I wanted to show other people that they're not alone and that God cares for them and that that this parenting journey is hard, but with God, hard things are doable and He helps us through them.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_00: Amen.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: And so um anyway, I guess that my final point for that would be I I want people to hold on to God through those difficult seasons because he's really the only way we can make it through those.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, so true, and then um some a little bit more about me right now.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: Um I am homeschooling all four of my children, and we've done that for about oh seven years now.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's really yeah, it's a been a great journey.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um it's fun.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: I I love my kids, and so I am very thankful that we get to do that with them.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: Although there are days I'm like, maybe we should send you to school.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: Mama needs break.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, says every homeschool mom at some point, right?
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that's awesome.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, I I noticed that you have a certain philosophy about homeschooling.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_01: Do you want to share that a little bit?
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, yes, I in my opinion, a lot of times people are when they're talking about homeschooling, they kind of think you're oversheltering your kids or that you're putting them in a bubble.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: And um I like to think of it as more of a greenhouse because um I think that by sheltering them or protecting them, we get to nurture their faith and we get to um build their character and help them to develop as adults so that they can make those decisions on their own of what they want to be as they get older.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: And so I just wanted homeschooling to be more of a protected environment where they can grow before they have to face those challenges that they will eventually face.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: So not a bubble, but a but a greenhouse where they can grow and thrive.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so important.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_01: And then what about?
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_01: I know you talk about teaching kids life skills.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_01: Is there an example or one that you particularly, you know, enjoy sharing?
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: You know, um part of that would be we have developed a system of chores in our house because at some point I realized that I was exhausted and doing everything what felt like on my own.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: And my children are growing up and they're they're capable to do things like washing the dishes or putting up their laundry.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: And when they were first, you know, five, six years old, it's really hard to teach them to fold clothes and put them in their drawer.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: But I think that it's important, even whenever things are hard to push through, because I want them to develop those abilities so that when they are adults, they know how to take care of themselves.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: And so even though, you know, it takes a little longer to get dishes done when you have a helper splashing water all over you, eventually in a few years, that's an independent thing that they can do to help.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_00: And so life just flows a little more smoothly.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, that's a good point.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_01: And I would say, like you mentioned, you know, even though it takes a little bit longer in the beginning, once they're independent and can do it on their own, then you won't have to go through the struggle of trying to teach them and get them to do it then, right?
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: At least, you know, in a ideally.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, obviously this could be sometimes there's struggles with kids, but you know, versus waiting until they're older and they can truly handle it on their own.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_01: Then you have to go through of this is why we're doing it, you know, this is why we're expecting you to do it.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I I'm all for that.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_01: I did that with my girls as well.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_01: I know my daughter is doing that with our grandchildren too.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I think it's so important.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_01: I think of that phrase, what's uh uh don't just like give a person a fish, teach them to fish, you know.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_01: So it's kind of that concept.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's a good point.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I I do still have to remind them to do their chores, but it's not something that they don't know how to do at this point.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, kind of develop those skills, and I think that they can take that with them into adulthood and become better leaders and better just adults when they can be responsible for the things that they need to take care of.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, so true.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_01: Well, again, I just highly recommend your book.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: Um, really beautifully written, too.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_01: And there's even um parts on the book, these little splashes of graphics that just are also beautiful with the roses.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_01: Um, oh, do you want to share a little bit about how you came up with that title?
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I would love to.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: Um actually, that's very special to my heart.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_00: Um at that point in time, I was struggling, not with my faith in God, that I was struggling finding that feeling of closeness to him because I was just kind of in a dark, I don't know, that I would say depression, but just just a spot where life was feeling very bleak.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: And um it was spring, and my friend Stevie had suggested I go outside and just try to find God in nature and and go find some quiet time outdoors because she found that that helps her feel more connected to God.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: And so I did that, and I just I felt really defeated because it's hard to just find God on a whim.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I realized I had felt so far away from him that I needed to find him again and feel closer.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: And um, the next day I went out and I it had just rained, and I walked out and my roses had bloomed and it had just rained, and there was this like rich fragrance of roses and then the honeysuckle, and I I just wept because I realized God cared that much for me that He gave me this beautiful smell just to not let me know that He was there.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_01: So that's beautiful.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's wonderful.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, well, speaking, you know, I and I would just say moms are gonna find so much encouragement in this book.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_01: Um, do you have a word of encouragement before we close for moms and dads?
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we know it can be overwhelming sometimes, right?
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_01: You have four children, you say?
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: I have four children.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: We're not quite into teenagers yet either.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_00: We have our oldest is 12.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: So I know that we are about to enter another season and it will have its challenges of its own.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but I guess my encouragement would be um that holding on to God through every season, he's gonna see you through.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: And what feels really hard and um like you're in a place you can't get out of, God can turn that around instantly.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_00: Or if you just hold on to him, your children do grow, they do become more independent, you do find joy in things, and um so God just he sees you through every season.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_00: And if you just hold on, there's a new season coming.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, so good.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_01: Well, again, Bonica, thank you so much for being on the show and sharing your book and a little bit about yourself and and your heart.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: And thank you, listeners, for joining us today.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: I highly recommend you check out her book on Bonica's website, which are listed in the show notes.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: And come back next week for another episode of Five Minute Parenting.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: Until then, have a blessed week.