Latest / I Do, Part 2 / Can You Really Trust Your Gut? One Doctor Says No, Unless You Do This First!
Transcript
- 0:02Speaker 1: Hey there, folks.
- 0:02Speaker 2: It is Saturday, September 19th. We hear it all the time.
- 0:06Speaker 2: People tell you, trust your gut. We got stats on
- 0:11Speaker 2: whether or not you should trust your gut. Welcome to
- 0:15Speaker 2: this episode of Amy and TJ. Before you break it down,
- 0:19Speaker 2: simply put, just give us a general idea.
- 0:21Speaker 1: Should we trust our gut?
- 0:23Speaker 3: Well, sometimes yes, sometimes no, but it's not something you
- 0:27Speaker 3: can consistently rely on, period.
- 0:30Speaker 1: Do not trust your gut. consistently. So is this, might
- 0:34Speaker 1: as well flip a coin?
- 0:35Speaker 3: Basically, there is a way to take what your gut
- 0:40Speaker 3: is feeling, relax your body, and then make a calm decision.
- 0:43Speaker 3: People are too quick to trust this rush to your stomach, literally.
- 0:48Speaker 3: And there is a chemical reaction, a hormonal reaction that
- 0:53Speaker 3: you are feeling. And there's a reason behind it, but
- 0:56Speaker 3: there's also a reason why you can't fully trust it.
- 0:58Speaker 2: Because it sounds like you're just running on emotion. I
- 1:01Speaker 2: think we're not supposed to do that.
- 1:02Speaker 1: Exactly. Is that what you're describing?
- 1:03Speaker 3: So a doctor, yes, who studies gut feelings for a
- 1:07Speaker 3: living wrote an article in Washington Post.
- 1:10Speaker 2: What school did he go? Where do you become a
- 1:12Speaker 2: doctor of gut behavior?
- 1:14Speaker 1: What is he doing?
- 1:14Speaker 3: Well, he's a neuroscientist.
- 1:16Speaker 1: A neuroscientist? Yes. Neuro? Yes.
- 1:18Speaker 3: And so gut feelings are a neurochemical signal.
- 1:22Speaker 1: Gut.
- 1:23Speaker 3: That leads to a change in your stomach's electrical rhythm.
- 1:27Speaker 3: That is exactly what a gut feeling is. But they
- 1:30Speaker 3: say when you look at the statistics, because they've done
- 1:33Speaker 3: plenty of studies about gut feelings, and they say, bottom line,
- 1:39Speaker 3: they should not be blindly trusted. I actually have stats
- 1:42Speaker 3: that's really interesting about how they actually came up with
- 1:46Speaker 3: this statistics. They actually talked to emergency room doctors who
- 1:51Speaker 3: had to make like immediate decisions. They're constantly having to
- 1:55Speaker 3: make rapid life or death decisions, right? So they did
- 1:59Speaker 3: some studies evaluating these emergency physicians. They found that by
- 2:03Speaker 3: relying on your gut feelings, it only led to the
- 2:05Speaker 3: right diagnosis in 54% of cases. Look, I guess that's
- 2:09Speaker 3: a little bit better than the majority, but still 48%
- 2:13Speaker 3: of the time or 46% of the time, I'm terrible.
- 2:15Speaker 1: Your gut was wrong.
- 2:16Speaker 3: Your gut was wrong. And so that was one of
- 2:18Speaker 3: the biggest, aha, wow. And it is, it's emotion so often.
- 2:23Speaker 3: And you have to really be able to recognize this.
- 2:25Speaker 3: So they described it like this. You meet somebody at
- 2:28Speaker 3: a party and you want to like them, but something
- 2:31Speaker 3: feels off and you don't really know what it is.
- 2:33Speaker 3: You can't pinpoint it, but you just get this like
- 2:35Speaker 3: bad feeling. And so we'll call this like, Ooh, I
- 2:38Speaker 3: just had a gut feeling. And then we all say, Ooh,
- 2:41Speaker 3: you know what? I don't know why, but I'm not
- 2:43Speaker 3: feeling that. I'm walking away. Bad energy. I've definitely felt that.
- 2:47Speaker 3: Have you felt that before?
- 2:47Speaker 2: I'm not a big gut guy, but yeah, I get
- 2:50Speaker 2: what people are talking about when they say that.
- 2:52Speaker 3: They say what happens is people who make quick judgments
- 2:55Speaker 3: based on their gut feelings often are misjudging the emotions
- 3:00Speaker 3: of the other person. And so if you actually employ
- 3:04Speaker 3: a systemic way of thinking, again, taking the emotion out,
- 3:07Speaker 3: you're going to have a much better chance of reading
- 3:09Speaker 3: someone because your emotions are trying to evaluate their emotions
- 3:14Speaker 3: and you're just almost never going to know.
- 3:17Speaker 2: Okay, we're saying evaluating another person, but sometimes people are
- 3:20Speaker 2: making gut decisions about all kinds of things, not necessarily
- 3:24Speaker 2: having to do with relationship. What are you supposed to,
- 3:27Speaker 2: I'm waiting to get to that part. What am I
- 3:29Speaker 2: supposed to do with the feeling I have?
- 3:31Speaker 3: Okay.
- 3:32Speaker 1: That gut feeling.
- 3:33Speaker 3: You have to recognize why you're having it.
- 3:35Speaker 1: Why you're having it.
- 3:35Speaker 3: All right. So they say the science of a gut feeling,
- 3:38Speaker 3: it's stress, even prior memories that will literally cause part
- 3:44Speaker 3: of your brain. It's called the amygdala. That's the emotional
- 3:48Speaker 3: processing hub, okay, of your brain. That's the part of
- 3:51Speaker 3: your brain, we were just talking about this with Betsy,
- 3:54Speaker 3: that is formed in the first few years of life.
- 3:57Speaker 3: And it's how it basically receives and feels love and
- 3:59Speaker 3: it's protecting you and it's all of these things. And
- 4:02Speaker 3: it releases a molecule. It's a corticot... I can't do this.
- 4:08Speaker 3: It releases a hormone, okay? And that hormone surges through
- 4:13Speaker 3: this nerve and it's the main communication highway between your
- 4:16Speaker 3: gut and your brain. And literally, your brain is processing
- 4:21Speaker 3: this emotion and it sends it straight to your stomach,
- 4:24Speaker 3: which makes it either feel... Like it can trigger spasms
- 4:27Speaker 3: in your colon, which is why you feel queasy or
- 4:30Speaker 3: you urgently have to use the bathroom. Like people get
- 4:32Speaker 3: gut reactions where they have to run to the restroom
- 4:35Speaker 3: or they suddenly feel nauseated or they suddenly feel queasy.
- 4:39Speaker 3: That is literally your brain that is processing emotions through
- 4:44Speaker 3: stress and through prior memories or prior experiences. And you
- 4:49Speaker 3: just get this rush of hormone that actually makes you
- 4:53Speaker 3: feel something.
- 4:54Speaker 2: How does it, I guess oftentimes it can be positive
- 4:58Speaker 2: or negative.
- 4:58Speaker 3: Yes. And they said that because it can be butterflies
- 5:03Speaker 3: on the first date because you just saw somebody who
- 5:06Speaker 3: you have the hots for and all of a sudden,
- 5:08Speaker 3: literally on a molecular level, you are feeling this excitement
- 5:11Speaker 3: and this rush. But it's also the same exact mechanism
- 5:16Speaker 3: when you are caught telling a lie and you get
- 5:19Speaker 3: busted and you're in trouble and someone's your mom or
- 5:22Speaker 3: a teacher's yelling at you, you get that pit in
- 5:24Speaker 3: your stomach and you feel like your stomach's tied into
- 5:26Speaker 3: a knot. Those are the same hormones causing very different
- 5:30Speaker 3: physical reactions in you. And so you can't necessarily trust
- 5:34Speaker 3: your body sometimes. One of them feels wonderful and the
- 5:38Speaker 3: other one feels terrible. And they're the same mechanism. Isn't
- 5:41Speaker 3: that wild? And they say because of that, you can't
- 5:47Speaker 3: trust your gut. Your gut is not an oracle. Your
- 5:49Speaker 3: gut is not telling you what you should do.
- 5:51Speaker 1: People swear by the gut.
- 5:53Speaker 3: You don't actually know what your body is responding to
- 5:56Speaker 3: and you don't know why it's having that response.
- 5:59Speaker 1: People swear by the gut. You have to trust your gut.
- 6:03Speaker 1: Gut instincts.
- 6:04Speaker 2: People say it all the time. I just have a feeling.
- 6:08Speaker 2: People live by that. I guess that's fine.
- 6:10Speaker 1: That's okay. But if You got a 50-50 shot. Yes.
- 6:13Speaker 1: And that's just as good as anything else.
- 6:15Speaker 3: All right. So what should you do when you get
- 6:18Speaker 3: that gut feeling? The expert who studies this for a
- 6:22Speaker 3: living says treat that gut reaction as a stop sign
- 6:27Speaker 3: and not a traffic signal. Like it's not telling you
- 6:31Speaker 3: to go, to slow down.
- 6:33Speaker 1: Stop.
- 6:34Speaker 3: It's not telling you that you've done something wrong. or
- 6:36Speaker 3: that something is really, really right. It's telling you to
- 6:39Speaker 3: slow down, stop, take a beat and look around and assess.
- 6:43Speaker 3: Like if you're getting that rush, just imagine that to you.
- 6:46Speaker 3: We all know what that feels like. Don't immediately act.
- 6:50Speaker 3: Don't immediately make a decision. Don't immediately... choose something, stop
- 6:56Speaker 3: and assess. Like take a moment. So look at it
- 6:59Speaker 3: as a stop sign. I thought that was really, really cool.
- 7:01Speaker 3: And they say that way you're actually interrupting the vagus nerve,
- 7:06Speaker 3: that thing that goes from your head to your gut,
- 7:08Speaker 3: and you're actually stopping it and you're letting everything calm down.
- 7:11Speaker 3: These are hormones surging through your body that don't necessarily
- 7:16Speaker 3: make you make the right decision. Isn't that so interesting?
- 7:19Speaker 1: Are you a gut girl?
- 7:22Speaker 3: I have in the past, um, I, yes, I think,
- 7:26Speaker 3: I don't necessarily solely rely on that, but I listened
- 7:31Speaker 3: to it and I have regarded it in that moment.
- 7:34Speaker 3: But I like the idea of not necessarily trying to
- 7:36Speaker 3: interpret it because you don't really know where it's coming from.
- 7:40Speaker 3: It's actually just maybe a signal for you to stop
- 7:43Speaker 3: and look around and analyze. They actually say you can
- 7:46Speaker 3: try to slow your breathing by focusing on extending your exhale.
- 7:50Speaker 3: And if you actually feel anxiety, like you've got this
- 7:52Speaker 3: gut feeling and you don't know what's going on, They
- 7:54Speaker 3: say you take a bag of ice cubes or frozen
- 7:57Speaker 3: veggies and put it over your face as you hold
- 8:00Speaker 3: your breath for 15 to 30 seconds. And they say
- 8:03Speaker 3: it will literally reduce your anxiety and calm your nervous
- 8:07Speaker 3: system down. And it will help you actually get a
- 8:11Speaker 3: regular rhythm back to your gut. And you'll be able
- 8:13Speaker 3: to make a better decision. Put ice on your face.
- 8:17Speaker 3: Have you ever heard of that before?
- 8:19Speaker 2: I haven't heard of most of the things in this
- 8:21Speaker 2: episode so far.
- 8:23Speaker 3: I just thought that was so cool. And this is
- 8:25Speaker 3: coming from somebody, again, who studies just what happens to
- 8:30Speaker 3: your body, the science of a gut reaction, and what
- 8:33Speaker 3: to do when you get that feeling. And this can happen. Look,
- 8:36Speaker 3: I remember when I first started going live, did you
- 8:38Speaker 3: ever get nervous?
- 8:40Speaker 1: Oh, I always got nervous.
- 8:41Speaker 3: I thought I was going to faint. I thought I
- 8:44Speaker 3: was going to have to run to the restroom. Like
- 8:45Speaker 3: it was just overpowering. And I remember like, yeah, you
- 8:49Speaker 3: have to breathe. If I had a bag of ice,
- 8:51Speaker 3: I probably would have put it on my face. But
- 8:53Speaker 3: what was that trying to tell you? Don't do this danger.
- 8:56Speaker 3: You could do something really stupid. If I had trusted
- 8:58Speaker 3: my gut when I was that scared, I actually felt
- 9:00Speaker 3: like I couldn't speak. I probably wouldn't be sitting here
- 9:03Speaker 3: today doing what I'm doing. I chose to go against
- 9:07Speaker 3: my gut reaction, which was telling me Stop, you're about
- 9:10Speaker 3: to make a fool of yourself.
- 9:14Speaker 1: See, is that, let me try this on.
- 9:18Speaker 3: Okay.
- 9:19Speaker 2: Do people listen to their gut only when it's nudging
- 9:22Speaker 2: them the direction their mind is already telling them to go?
- 9:25Speaker 3: Right?
- 9:25Speaker 2: You didn't listen to your gut because you had a dream.
- 9:28Speaker 2: You had a desire. You had a goal. You had
- 9:31Speaker 2: a passion. You had a career. You know, and the
- 9:34Speaker 2: gut's telling, I'm not going to listen to you gut.
- 9:38Speaker 2: How much does the mind really still have a play here, Robes,
- 9:43Speaker 2: in that do people, and I hear people say it
- 9:46Speaker 2: all the time, that they actually make decisions, like big
- 9:48Speaker 2: life decisions based on gut.
- 9:51Speaker 1: What is wrong with you? I can't comprehend that.
- 9:55Speaker 3: But the point being is they're making those decisions, and
- 9:58Speaker 3: if they can only recognize that that gut feeling might
- 10:01Speaker 3: be coming from some past trauma, or from some past experience.
- 10:05Speaker 3: And they don't realize that that gut feeling is actually
- 10:08Speaker 3: coming from a completely different place and is actually screwing
- 10:12Speaker 3: with your interpretation of what's actually at hand. So that's
- 10:17Speaker 3: part of it. That's the whole point to stop, to
- 10:19Speaker 3: get curious, to ask yourself, wow, why do I feel
- 10:22Speaker 3: so strongly? It can't just be like woo-woo, like the
- 10:27Speaker 3: universe is speaking to me. No, there's something in your body.
- 10:30Speaker 3: There's something in your brain. There's something in your memory.
- 10:32Speaker 3: There's something in you that is giving you this warning
- 10:35Speaker 3: and it's worth looking at. It's worth examining, but don't
- 10:38Speaker 3: make a decision solely based on that because you actually
- 10:41Speaker 3: don't know the source of it. I thought that was
- 10:43Speaker 3: so interesting. All right. When we come back, this same
- 10:47Speaker 3: doctor also said, you know what? Your gut feeling can
- 10:51Speaker 3: also be right. And they're going to tell you when
- 10:54Speaker 3: you know, and when you should actually follow your gut.
- 11:08Speaker 3: Welcome back everyone to Amy and TJ. So don't you
- 11:12Speaker 3: feel like you're understanding where your gut feeling may come from,
- 11:16Speaker 3: what to do about it, and why not to necessarily
- 11:19Speaker 3: immediately trust it, to examine it, to get curious. But
- 11:22Speaker 3: now the same doctor is telling us, you know what?
- 11:25Speaker 3: You got to remember that your gut feeling can also
- 11:27Speaker 3: be right. And one of the ways you might be,
- 11:31Speaker 3: or you should actually lean into the feeling your body
- 11:34Speaker 3: is giving you when it's persistent. when it's a nagging sense,
- 11:38Speaker 3: when something doesn't add up and you just keep getting,
- 11:42Speaker 3: so you've not immediately reacted, but every time the situation
- 11:46Speaker 3: comes up or every time it's persistent. And so what
- 11:49Speaker 3: you do is you start asking more questions. You start
- 11:54Speaker 3: requesting to just keep examining why. And sometimes that instinct
- 12:01Speaker 3: they said has turned out to be life-saving. Sometimes people,
- 12:04Speaker 3: you know, people, my gut knew, I knew not to,
- 12:07Speaker 3: I will tell you, I've had feelings before where something
- 12:10Speaker 3: just feels like it's telling you not to cross the
- 12:13Speaker 3: street or to take a step back or to, and
- 12:16Speaker 3: all of a sudden a truck ran, runs a red light.
- 12:19Speaker 3: I've had that happen. That could be coincidence. But I
- 12:22Speaker 3: remember in that moment feeling like it was a gut
- 12:24Speaker 3: feeling and to trust those spidey senses, they call it, right?
- 12:28Speaker 3: But it is when it's nagging and it's lingering and
- 12:32Speaker 3: you take a beat and it's still there. There are
- 12:35Speaker 3: moments where they say you should trust your gut. Have
- 12:38Speaker 3: you ever, do you have a moment where you can
- 12:40Speaker 3: look back and say, hell yeah, I'm so glad I
- 12:42Speaker 3: trusted my gut on that one?
- 12:44Speaker 1: I don't. Wow.
- 12:46Speaker 2: Maybe just on the spot I can't remember something. Surely
- 12:48Speaker 2: along the way I'm just not a gut guy. You
- 12:51Speaker 2: know this because I overthink and plan and go through
- 12:55Speaker 2: scenarios and steps and on almost everything big and small
- 13:01Speaker 2: to the point of annoyance of the other people in
- 13:03Speaker 2: the house. So I'm just not, I'm thorough. I don't
- 13:07Speaker 2: look at something, oh, I got a good feeling about
- 13:09Speaker 2: that one.
- 13:09Speaker 3: You never say that. Actually, just hearing that come out
- 13:12Speaker 3: of your mouth is so funny. And look, the doctor
- 13:14Speaker 3: also said this. I thought this was interesting. We all
- 13:17Speaker 3: remember the time we had the gut feeling where there
- 13:20Speaker 3: was a payoff. Like, see?
- 13:21Speaker 1: See?
- 13:22Speaker 3: I knew it. But you don't remember all the times
- 13:26Speaker 3: that your gut feeling was wrong or steered you in
- 13:28Speaker 3: the wrong direction or actually flagged nothing whatsoever. We forget
- 13:33Speaker 3: about those, but we remember, like I'm telling you, I
- 13:35Speaker 3: remember the time where I had a feeling, I took
- 13:38Speaker 3: a step back and boom, a truck ran a red
- 13:40Speaker 3: light and I thought, holy hell, that was my gut
- 13:43Speaker 3: saving me.
- 13:43Speaker 1: And then after people tell that gut story, they say, yeah,
- 13:46Speaker 1: my gut is never right. So I always listen to
- 13:49Speaker 1: my gut. They save my life.
- 13:51Speaker 3: Absolutely do say that. And look, the point being, they
- 13:54Speaker 3: say it's what you typically do after you realize you
- 13:57Speaker 3: have a gut feeling. It's what you choose to do
- 14:01Speaker 3: after you take that beat. If you ask the right
- 14:03Speaker 3: follow-up questions, if you dig for more detail, that's what
- 14:06Speaker 3: actually leads to the outcome where you could say, aha,
- 14:10Speaker 3: my gut, I knew it in my gut. But actually
- 14:12Speaker 3: it's oftentimes what we do after we get that feeling,
- 14:15Speaker 3: the questions we ask, the curiosity we show. before we
- 14:18Speaker 3: make a decision, and that does usually lead to the
- 14:21Speaker 3: best outcome. So maybe pay attention that something is happening
- 14:26Speaker 3: in your body, but it doesn't necessarily mean what you
- 14:29Speaker 3: think it does. It could mean danger, it could mean excitement,
- 14:33Speaker 3: it could mean nothing at all, but you only will
- 14:36Speaker 3: figure out if it's something that can be trusted if
- 14:38Speaker 3: you give it a beat, if you give it a moment,
- 14:41Speaker 3: if you don't rush to make a decision based solely
- 14:45Speaker 3: on this chemical reaction happening in your body. You've never
- 14:49Speaker 3: really ever done something based on a gut feeling, babe?
- 14:52Speaker 3: Not once?
- 14:53Speaker 2: You know, I annoy you all with how much I
- 14:56Speaker 2: think through and make a plan for the simplest of things.
- 15:01Speaker 3: Were you born that way?
- 15:02Speaker 1: I don't know, babe.
- 15:04Speaker 2: I looked through several car companies before I picked the
- 15:08Speaker 2: right one. I look through, baby, you see me do
- 15:11Speaker 2: this all the time. I'm just that way. I don't
- 15:16Speaker 2: go with an instinct or a good feeling.
- 15:17Speaker 1: Nah, let me look this through.
- 15:19Speaker 2: So no, baby, you are not instinct. You weren't some
- 15:23Speaker 2: feeling or something. No, it was a lot of thoughts went.
- 15:27Speaker 1: Into all of this.
- 15:28Speaker 3: You know, it's funny. No, I said this to you.
- 15:31Speaker 3: I look up quote of the days for our morning
- 15:32Speaker 3: runs that we have on Mondays through Friday. And there
- 15:35Speaker 3: was one quote I found a while ago. And you said,
- 15:38Speaker 3: why won't you believe it? You're an overthinker. You've acknowledged that.
- 15:42Speaker 3: I've obviously seen that in you plenty, but it says,
- 15:46Speaker 3: believe an overthinker when they tell you they love you.
- 15:52Speaker 1: You should be sitting pretty. You know how much thought
- 15:56Speaker 1: I've given to this?
- 15:58Speaker 3: I know.
- 15:59Speaker 1: Because my gut's been telling me something else. No, I'm kidding.
- 16:02Speaker 3: No, it's good. You've been getting curious. You've been getting curious.
- 16:05Speaker 3: That's always a good thing, everybody. And we hope you
- 16:09Speaker 3: enjoyed listening to us. We always love you having you
- 16:12Speaker 3: along with us on this Relationship Saturday. I'm Amy Robach
- 16:16Speaker 3: alongside TJ Holmes. We'll talk to you soon.