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How to Stay Accountable to Your Goals · Arise Women of God

• 0:00
  Have you ever started a goal with massive excitement only to have life throw you a curveball like a family crisis, an illness, or even a flooded house that makes your goal feel impossible to achieve?
• 0:14
  Most of us quit because we feel an obstacle is a stop sign from God when it's actually just a pivot point.
• 0:22
  Today we're answering the question how to stay accountable to your goals.
• 0:27
  And by the end of this episode, you will understand understand how to build a messy middle mindset and solve the pain of disruption induced guilt by learning how to delegate rest and reward your way to the finish line.
• 0:43
  We're moving from rigid perfection to a flexible walk with God and His spirit.
• 0:48
  Stay tuned.
• 0:49
  Ordinary Women Extraordinary Faith When God calls, we say yes.
• 0:56
  The Arise Women of God Podcast hello and welcome to another episode of the Arise Women of God podcast.
• 1:03
  I'm your host, Tamara K.
• 1:05
  Andersen, and joining me today is Wendi Christensen, my co founder of Women warriors of Light, and Kari Anjewierden from our advisory board.
• 1:14
  And we're talking about the grit required for growth today.
• 1:18
  First, we're going to discuss why you should expect the storm and how to pivot like a tree moving in the wind.
• 1:26
  Second, we'll talk about the messy middle and why you should record miracles on the hardest weeks.
• 1:32
  Third, I'll share a personal story about how losing my voice led to the power of delegation.
• 1:39
  And finally, we'll share the stewardship of reward and rest and why your worth is not tied to your work.
• 1:48
  But first, we're going to have Wendi share about the divine pivot and why we need to plan for obstacles.
• 1:55
  Plan on obstacles coming.
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  I think if you already know ahead of time, hey, I'm gonna set this goal.
• 2:01
  It looks beautiful.
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  You've written it down or you've got it on your wall?
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  Just plan.
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  There's gonna be obstacles.
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  Whether that's the mental obstacle of I don't want to get up and I don't want to go running or walking or go to the gym or maybe some anxiety or struggling with some depression.
• 2:19
  I'm having a hard time getting out of bed.
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  Just expect the obstacles to come because.
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  Because they will come.
• 2:25
  I'm having a house flood this week and it's disrupted all of my goals for the week.
• 2:31
  I mean, it's shifted everything, but I'm reevaluating them and going, okay, well, how can I tweak those goals to help them to fit in with where I'm at right now?
• 2:40
  Because ironically, one of my goals this year was to simplify my home.
• 2:46
  I wanted to clean out Some closets.
• 2:48
  And I had an appointment this week for a friend of mine to come and help me clean out one of my really big closets under my.
• 2:54
  My stairs and to organize it.
• 2:56
  And I actually had to, like, text her and say, I can't do that this week.
• 3:00
  And then I thought, God has a really funny sense of humor because now I am being forced to clean out my whole entire kitchen.
• 3:09
  And so I'm like, oh, he is making me organize.
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  He, like, jumped on this goal faster than I did.
• 3:15
  I was not ready for this goal.
• 3:17
  So I'm completely pivoting and shifting my goals.
• 3:21
  And it's okay.
• 3:22
  The more flexible you can be with obstacles, like the trees that bend with the wind and sway, the more flexible you can be when that wind comes or that storm comes and shifts you, the better off you're going
• 3:33
  to be to still be successful at that goal.
• 3:36
  It just may look differently than you thought in the beginning.
• 3:38
  Isn't it funny how God can jumpstart our goals in ways we did not ask for?
• 3:43
  Wendy's flood turned into a renovation of her entire life.
• 3:48
  But.
• 3:48
  But when you're in the middle of that flood, it just feels messy.
• 3:52
  Next, Kari's going to share how the mess is actually a prerequisite for the miracle.
• 3:59
  But what I've learned through the years is that often those goals, those things that we want to do, they get messy.
• 4:07
  If I'm cleaning out my pantry, I'm going to make a big mess before it's cleaned up.
• 4:13
  And to be able to mentally prepare myself for that goes a long way to making me successful in trying to accomplish that, because I can give myself grace through the process.
• 4:25
  To say, this might take me a couple of days, maybe even a week, and it's going to be messy.
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  My house is going to be a wreck while I'm trying to do this.
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  But when I'm done, it will look the way that I want it to.
• 4:37
  But another thing that I've learned is perspective.
• 4:40
  And especially in a situation like yours, Wende, where things are not unfolding the way that you anticipated they might this week, and you're having to pivot, but to stop and say, where is God in this?
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  And what am I supposed to learn?
• 4:55
  And are there miracles?
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  And write those down, because there always will be miracles in those things.
• 5:02
  Those things do feel heavy, and it's not so easy to just pivot.
• 5:07
  Sometimes we want to sit and wallow in that depression just a little bit, right?
• 5:12
  And that's okay, too, if we need to.
• 5:14
  To take a moment to just feel feels right.
• 5:18
  But then bring God in so that he can help lighten the load and make it doable again.
• 5:25
  So, ladies, record those miracles.
• 5:28
  When you see God's hand in the mess, the mess stops feeling so heavy.
• 5:33
  But sometimes being accountable means realizing that you can't do it alone.
• 5:38
  I don't think God ever intended us to.
• 5:41
  Last year, I got sick and lost my voice right when we had a major recording deadline.
• 5:46
  And God taught me that accountability often looks like asking for help.
• 5:52
  We were recording podcasts and I got terribly sick, like for two weeks.
• 5:59
  Lost my voice for part of it.
• 6:01
  I mean, not great, especially when we're supposed to be recording podcasts.
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  What I felt impressed to do in that was to delegate.
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  And one of the ladies on our advisory board was taking a podcasting class from me at the time, and I said, how would you like to step into the role as host and host this next batch of podcasts
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  that we record?
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  And so the goal was the same.
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  I just wasn't doing it all by myself.
• 6:30
  Sometimes we have a goal and it has a specific timeline, and there's no way you're going to do it in the condition you're in.
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  Like I was.
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  And so I had to kind of broaden my perspective.
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  How can we get this done another way?
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  And that's when the idea came.
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  I'm sure it was inspired, but she did.
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  She hosted the whole next round of podcasts.
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  I was there, and I was able to comment in my raspy little voice.
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  So when we say be flexible, sometimes it takes thinking out of the box for you to accomplish the goal.
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  Bringing other people in.
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  And you know what was great?
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  At the end of that, she was able to say, I learned I could do it.
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  She had built some confidence.
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  And so it was a great opportunity for her, and it was a godsend for me.
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  Oh, my goodness, guys, delegation is a godsend.
• 7:16
  And once you've done the hard work of pivoting and partnering, you have to celebrate a little bit.
• 7:22
  Now Wendy's going to share with us and how she has discovered that rewards are actually the fuel for long term consistency.
• 7:31
  I think women are really bad at rewards and following through and setting up a reward for ourselves.
• 7:37
  We just think, I got to do it, got to get it done.
• 7:40
  But I found it's really beautiful to set up a reward for myself.
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  And I think sometimes we feel like we don't deserve a reward for just doing the things we should be doing or we want to be doing or setting those goals and accomplishing them.
• 7:53
  But I think it's really important to celebrate them and to do it with something small.
• 7:57
  Whether it's like, get my chocolate, I'm going to take a piece of chocolate, or I get to watch my favorite show or a movie, or I'm going to go out with my significant person, or I'm going to go
• 8:06
  celebrate with my kids.
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  Whatever it is, finding a reward and using it, I think it's important to celebrate us and to celebrate yourself for accomplishing a goal.
• 8:18
  Set a reward and then do the reward.
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  Because sometimes I set a reward and then I don't do it.
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  And I'm like, well, that's so fun.
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  I want to be able to do the reward.
• 8:27
  For me, it's been a lot of times, like downtime.
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  I'm gonna go watch my favorite show.
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  I'm gonna go read my favorite book.
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  It's just really important to reward yourself so that you feel excited about your goals because you know that there's a fun reward also happening at the end.
• 8:42
  So reward yourself so that you stay excited about the hard work that you're doing.
• 8:48
  But sometimes the greatest reward is the permission to simply be still.
• 8:54
  If you want to stay accountable for the long haul, you have to organize your life so that it includes rest.
• 9:02
  Another principle I think, especially if you want to stay accountable to goals, is to give yourself space to rest.
• 9:09
  Nobody can be turned on all the time.
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  No matter how motivated you are, you have to schedule time to rest.
• 9:16
  And I think we can follow this pattern that was set forth and the creation of the world.
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  Work, work, work, work, work, work, rest.
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  We've forgotten how to do that in our modern go, go, go society.
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  And for us to sustainably move forward with anything, we need to learn to rest.
• 9:34
  We need to learn to listen to our bodies and say it in our minds.
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  It is okay for me to rest.
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  I had a real struggle with that at first because I.
• 9:44
  I think we as women especially tie our worth to how hard we are working.
• 9:50
  And so just saying, you know what?
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  I work better when I have a break and give myself time to rest.
• 9:58
  And so that is a goal I had to set for myself.
• 10:01
  I put it on my vision board.
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  It's okay for me to rest.
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  My worth is independent of how hard I'm working.
• 10:08
  I have worth, period.
• 10:09
  I can rest, period.
• 10:11
  The other thing that I think we are particularly bad at as women is doing too much.
• 10:18
  When we set a goal and we're going to stack it on top of everything we're already doing.
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  Sometimes we fail because there's too much that we're doing and so pausing and saying, if I'm starting something new, then something has to change or go from my current capacity or you will burn yourself out.
• 10:38
  I know I'm speaking from experience, okay, and so we have a fantastic resource at Women warriors of Light.
• 10:46
  It's called our not to Do List, and it's where you list everything out that you're doing and then you prayerfully decide, okay, which of these things am I keeping?
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  Which can I delegate?
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  Which can I change?
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  What can I get rid of?
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  And it helps you make room for the new things so that you are successful long term because you have the bandwidth to do whatever you need to do.
• 11:08
  Accountability isn't white knuckling it through a crisis.
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  It's about yoking yourself to Jesus Christ, knowing when to rest, when to pivot, and when to celebrate.
• 11:19
  If you're ready to clear the clutter and make room for what God is actually asking you to do, go download our A Guide to Goal Setting for Christian Women.
• 11:28
  It includes the not to Do List worksheet that we talked about today.
• 11:32
  And if your messy middle feels a little too heavy to carry alone, join our Women Warriors Accountability Group.
• 11:39
  Links are in the description.
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  So give yourself some grace today.
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  You are doing better than you think and until next time, may you arise.
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  Do it God's way.
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  God strong.