Latest / Spiritual Sense: Practical wisdom to quiet an overthinking mind and recharge your soul / True Success: Who Are You Becoming?

Transcript

True Success: Who Are You Becoming? · Spiritual Sense: Practical wisdom to quiet an overthinking mind and recharge your soul

• 0:01
  Speaker A: Do you ever feel like no matter how much you have, how much you do, how much you achieve, it's never enough, there's always more and it just keeps going. Well, today we're talking about how we can shift that whole idea of achieving, achieving, achieving endlessly from doing, doing, doing, to being, to being happy, to becoming the sort of person who is a blessing in the world, to feeling good, to experiencing your life, your presence as a gift. So welcome, welcome, welcome to this wonderful podcast. Thank you for being here. Hello, Shereen.
• 0:47
  Speaker B: Hello, Michael.
• 0:49
  Speaker A: Yay. So tell us about being versus doing.
• 0:55
  Speaker B: Being versus doing. You know, my favorite thing is about the mid path, right? It is the mid path because if you really, from your heart, don't do good things, then you cannot be. Let's say we are talking, let's say being. Give me a virtue that we have to be love, love. I feel if I'm not really showing love and doing acts of love for people, then I can't really be love.
• 1:34
  Speaker A: Right? So it's both then.
• 1:36
  Speaker B: It's both. You can't go to this extreme or this extreme.
• 1:39
  Speaker A: It has to be the middle practical. It's the middle way. It's the middle way. It's true, it's true. Because we could say, oh, I'm just sitting here, just. But doing things is part of being. Another way of seeing this is that it's what we become as a result of what we've done that ultimately is the end result, the end goal. So we do a bunch of stuff. Let's say we're giving and helping people and doing all this stuff. It ends up turning us into a different type of person. We become somebody. Through all of that, even meditation or service or whatever, we become different. Who we are as a, as a presence changes based on our actions.
• 2:27
  Speaker B: And you know, in this doing versus becoming, you have to think of the long game. The reason why I'm saying you have to think of the long game is in, in the center here we used to have a public space where people came. And you know, it was not just a meditation center, but we had exhibits that people could come. We called it the museum. And so because we, and at that point every day we kept it open and we had hours of opening. And so it was really dependent on the community to keep it open because I had a full time job and there was no way I could sit there all the time. And so we would have turns, we would have a roster, we would write, you know, and so many times what would happen is someone would write Their name. And then let's say they're doing something on Saturday, that they're doing museum service on Saturday. They write their name. And then. And so we open at 10, at 9 o'clock, I get a call saying, I'm not doing it because I'm going to Disney. And then you have to drop everything you're doing and go, you know, go sit in the museum because the person who was doing dropped in the last minute, right? So a couple of times this happened, and then I found out what was happening. So there was this other soul who was very loving, right? Externally, very loving, very sweet, very. All of that. And she would make plans to go to Disney. And not only would she make plans for her to go to Disney, but then whoever is doing museum, oh, you want to come? You want to come? You want to come? And suddenly everyone's going to Disney and I'm doing museum service. She didn't invite you to Disney Museum.
• 4:29
  Speaker A: She should have invited you instead of the other people.
• 4:32
  Speaker B: But anyways, right? And so. And she was so loving, right? Everyone felt she was loving. And I had so much responsibility, so much responsibility. And I was not the most loving person at that point. Because, you know, like, if someone's dropping in the last minute, right. I could have been nicer to them, I guess, but I would totally.
• 4:58
  Speaker A: Yeah. And you've been working full time, like the whole week, busy, busy, busy, all this other stuff. And now you need to do something, and now you've got to do something.
• 5:06
  Speaker B: You can't just.
• 5:07
  Speaker A: Yeah, last minute.
• 5:08
  Speaker B: Yeah, last minute. So there was several things I resented at that point, right? The first thing I resented was that I have to drop everything and go do this. The second point I resented was why wouldn't they give me more notice, right? Why in the last minute? Because then I can't call anyone at the last minute. The third point is like, you're all going to Disney and I'm doing this, right? And the fourth point I resented was the person who instigated this and who wouldn't do, you know, carry her weight around, was the one everyone loved, not the person who's actually doing things, right? They totally loved her. And so I was not a happy camper at that point. So I had to change a lot of things inside. But one of the things that I had to really change was understand the long game, you know, Understand the long game. But the fact that dedicated so much time and just showed up and all of that, in the long run, I feel I got a lot more, you know, I achieved a. Not achieved. I attained a lot more. I attained a lot more than all these people. Even though everyone was like, oh, she's so loving. Right. Ultimately, in the long run I feel I became more loving because sometimes just putting in the work makes you very loving.
• 6:43
  Speaker A: Yeah, it builds. I mean you're, it's, it's loving based on pressure rather than loving based on ease. That's the difference, isn't it? Because like there's the expression, anyone can be happy with people who like them, you know, and if every, if everything's going well and your health is great and everything's fine, then you're probably going to feel fine. But if you're under a lot of pressure and that situation, you feel good, that's more elevated level, isn't it?
• 7:11
  Speaker B: Right, so. And I feel at that point, right, doing was important. Doing was important, but also I could have been more loving.
• 7:19
  Speaker A: It's both, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, it's. I think in when people have these near death experiences or when people are dying, they often look back on their life if they were working all the time and they say there was so much more to life than just work and being loving people, caring and all that stuff is, is actually what they regret not doing more of. So there isn't, I think that makes, you know, like they think, yeah, what did I do? My whole life I was always in the office, always running around, but did I really connect with anyone? Did I really enjoy it? Did I enjoy my life? You know, so. But having said that, like I'll give a different example of this, right? I for a long time wasn't taking proper responsibility for various things in my life and my work because I had people working for me and I just wasn't paying attention because I didn't need to. And so I've sort of been a bit free spirited, do whatever I feel like sort of person and you know, no, not you. And I'm still sort of like that in some ways. But it's, But I've recently, the last couple of years I've had to have a really good look at a lot of different things and like even like today I'm like looking at my phone and there's all these messages from people like what about this and this? And I'm like, oh my God, all these details. But I feel that that what it's doing for me as a result of that is that I'm becoming a more grounded, stable, sensible person who can get stuff done properly, which is good. Do you Know, I mean like that's, that's, that's something that I'm becoming, I'm becoming a different sort of person and I, that the end result of our life is who have we become internally? And it shouldn't just be like only one side of it. Like some people, they're very loving and free spirited and whatever else, but they're completely out to lunch when and with everything else. And as a result of that.
• 9:34
  Speaker B: Right, right, I think you called it right. I think that was the issue with this person. So loving and so sweet but like causing when it comes to reliability or anything else.
• 9:46
  Speaker A: Yeah, like causing it really. Like I, I probably was more like that. Like that's all loving and wonderful but you're actually causing sorrow to a lot of people because things, things are being dropped, things are not happening, things are going wrong and oh, it doesn't matter, blah, blah. But if someone has to clean up all the mess, you know, some people, they're super loving and they're like, oh, it's wonderful, good vibes. But they totally dropped the ball and cause loads of other people a bunch of problems because they're not paying attention, they're not paying their bills, they're not doing stuff. Like I worked with someone who was really lovely, wonderful guy, but he, we worked on all these websites and then he just totally spaced it, didn't pay the bills for our domain names and all that stuff and then someone else ended up getting them and all the work we'd done and everything we'd done was gone because he couldn't, he wasn't paying attention to simple things. Whereas other people, they're super on point but they're a bit cruel actually, a bit too harsh, but it's gone too far the other way and they've sort of missed the point of life entirely. If it's gone way too far that side, they're like money, money, money and organize, organize, organized and strict, strict, strict, strict, strict. And everyone hates them and it's just a total disaster. So, so we, so we want to have our presence as a rounded thing. You know that I have this list of virtues. There's a long, long list like this extra long list. I think it had like 160 virtues or something. And I was, I went through it with a pen ticking off which ones I thought I had and I, I felt like I had half of them and the half that I had roughly were all the more free spirited ones. And the ones that were all missing were things like discipline and orderliness and like You. But I'm getting better at it. I'm getting better at it. But we need both. That's, that's. That's what it means to become our higher self. So.
• 11:42
  Speaker B: Right. That they have to. You're absolutely right. Right. You know, like they are, you could say the love and the. Let's say love is the feminine.
• 11:55
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 11:55
  Speaker B: I'm not saying only feminine. Only females are loving. I'm not saying that. Let's just call it the feminine energy. Right. And then orderliness and discipline and all that. Let's call it masculine energy. And I feel we have to have like Vishnu. Right. We have to have a combination of both.
• 12:16
  Speaker A: Right.
• 12:17
  Speaker B: And so becoming could be if you are. Your virtues go too much on the masculine side, then you have to adopt the feminine virtues. And if your virtues go too much on the feminine side, you have to, you know, wear. You have to learn to wear the masculine virtues.
• 12:36
  Speaker A: Yeah. We need both. Otherwise we are off track. So. And, and it's what we do over a certain amount of time that causes us to change. Like we can't just.
• 12:50
  Speaker B: Right.
• 12:50
  Speaker A: Become something. We. We become it through what we do. Like our actions cause us to be different people. So like for example, I'm. I'm more organized than I used to be. As a result of spending more time doing. Organizing things. I didn't become organized first. I actually had the intention to do certain things. And as a result of that, I created a habit which then changed my feelings around things. So the end of our life, whatever we've been doing again and again and again long enough is what we become. And. And we lose everything we have because when we die, right? So like this equipment I have and money and whatever else, all that's gone, right? I'm not going to be. What am I going to do with this mic? Someone else is going to have it, right. If it's still useful. But what I've become, I'll take with me. And if I've been doing and practicing and thinking certain things long enough, then if it's a wonderful thing I've become, then I'll bring that to my next life.
• 13:53
  Speaker B: This is something very important you're sharing about. Really looking at your legacy and looking at not just a legacy implies for someone else. But what is it that you are taking with you at the end of life, Right? Because a lot of the things that happen during our life is dictated by our ego. You know, let's say I want $17 million is really dictated by my ego. A lot of things are dictated by my ego. I want fame dictated by my ego. I want, you know, 2 million subscribers on YouTube dictated by my ego. And so what happens is actually dictated by a lot of the vices, but ego is one of them. And what happens is if we do actions based on any of the vices, because my ego is asking me to do it, that is something I will not take with me to my. It's not coming.
• 15:05
  Speaker A: The ego will come with you.
• 15:06
  Speaker B: Don't you think it's going to stay. The ego will come with me. But whatever it is that I have quote, unquote achieved.
• 15:13
  Speaker A: Right.
• 15:14
  Speaker B: Because ego made me achieve is not coming with me.
• 15:17
  Speaker A: Yeah. So there's nothing there, really. And it can be taken away at any time because you never know when you're gonna die.
• 15:25
  Speaker B: Right? Right. And ego drives us so much. Right. There's so much conversation in our heads going on because of our ego. And so to be really mindful of it. But, you know, I was thinking about this, right? What is this whole idea of achieving and becoming and all of that? You know, one of the things I feel is like the secret to success is one of the things I feel is we have to be able to look at our shadow side. Whether it's ego, whether it's arrogance, whether it is greed, anything. Right. We have to have the courage to look at it. And we. The way we have the courage to look at it is we look at it neutrally. Right. Oh, so bad. Or oh, this is so wonderful. No, it has to be neutral. There is all of these vices going on, but can I look at myself neutrally without getting affected by them? And I feel that courage helps us become a better version of ourselves.
• 16:47
  Speaker A: That's very interesting. Yeah. We do need to have a good look at ourselves because there are things going on that are not helpful for our. For our life. And like, for example, yesterday I. I ate too much chocolate. I admit it, that they're these chocolate covered cashew nuts. Right. I got them from Whole Foods.
• 17:12
  Speaker B: Oh my God. Cashew nuts itself are so addictive. And then. Chocolate covered.
• 17:17
  Speaker A: Yeah. So I ate. I ate a very healthy meal, right. And I. And I had a juice fast in the morning. Then I had this one meal and I. And I thought, okay, this is great. That. But then some part of me was like, I'm not satiated because they didn't have any sugar. Right. And I was like, but you bought those cashews. So I walked in the kitchen, grabbed the. And I polished off the whole. It wasn't. It's A little bag. It's not that many, but. But I felt that this morning I woke up and I felt bit bloated and just slightly irritated when I woke up in the morning. And I thought, why did you eat all that. All that stuff? But that's. That's a vice right there. That's. That's some. Some. Something in me wanted a certain. Certain satisfaction and it had a negative consequence, which then I have to deal with. And it's. And the thing is that one event is not a big deal, but if that goes on again and again and again and again, that's causing me problems, causing me sorrow, like multiple. Multiple times. And so we have to be willing to look at this stuff and go, what am I going to do next time that happens? You know, and why. What is the reason for this and what can be done about it? Because that changes our beingness. You know, can I. Can I do something different? You know, can I be safe? I mean, it's. When you're hungry, it's hard not to eat food as, you know, Shreem did a juice fast. It was a proper water fast yesterday.
• 18:54
  Speaker B: So, you know, a water fast now. I was thinking about this, eating cashew nuts. In the long run, actually, it's not so bad. There are so many other vices that are much worse than eating a bag of cashews. Really?
• 19:10
  Speaker A: No, I mean, I just. It's just. It's not that. It's just I felt slightly bloated that. That. So that was. I was causing myself sorrow. That's the thing. It's. There's nothing really wrong with eating, but.
• 19:21
  Speaker B: There was a lot of happiness. Right. When you were eating it?
• 19:26
  Speaker A: There was some. It wasn't as much happening.
• 19:28
  Speaker B: Was the happiness enough versus No, I don't think so.
• 19:31
  Speaker A: Didn't I? I think that brand. I mean, there are other things I eat that I get more, but it's like. I mean, karma is like, you get something, but what do you pay for it? And is it worth, like, on balance, which is heavier, you know? And I think that's. That's really what it. Like if what we do again and again and again, on balance, leads us better off than we were before, that's fine. But if it doesn't, then we're just screwing ourselves over.
• 20:02
  Speaker B: I feel that you can look at it neutrally. Yeah, right. You can look at the past neutrally. You can look at yourself eating it neutrally as just a detached observer. Right. I feel there's a certain power that comes from that. Like, you Feel powered, empowered for looking at, I think. And it takes a lot of courage, though. Eating cashews is not a big deal. But other vices, right? We all have major vices. And you look at anything you have done under the influence of devices instead of really beating yourself down or feeling bad or feeling good or whatever it is, right? Neutrally, yeah.
• 20:48
  Speaker A: I mean, when you look at it, when I think back to various negative energies that got the better of me as a new, as a detached, as neutral, detached observer, it really does seem like there was like a negative energy that possessed temporarily and then it disappeared, you know, and it's like that's not the higher self. That's just some negative feeling that just came through and then went off, you know?
• 21:15
  Speaker B: Moini Didi, our admin, our head of the Brahma Kumaris, she said something recently which was very interesting. She said that the vices in the soul are like worms, like, let's say, in rice. I don't know if you've seen these rice worms. They look exactly like rice. They are the same length as the rice. They are white. And they camouflage themselves in the rice because they look like rice, Right. It's very hard to find them. You have to keep looking and then you'll find them. Or you see some worms in broccoli. They look green and they look like broccoli. And then they start moving and they realize, oh, my God, that's not broccoli, that's a worm in there. Right? And so she was sharing that the vices are like that in the soul, right? They are these, they look like they camouflage as the soul, but actually it's the vice that is in the soul, which are worms in the soul. And so these negative energies you were talking about, these worms are just erupting, right? They're awakening, erupting, coming out, doing their thing. And you can't ignore them. You can't say, oh, it's okay, it's there, or you can't really feel bad that they're there. Right. You just have to really be neutral.
• 22:52
  Speaker A: Yeah, yeah.
• 22:54
  Speaker B: But you have to see that they're there. They're there. It's, I, I, I'm, I apologize if I'm contradicting you in any way, but I feel that these are within the soul.
• 23:07
  Speaker A: Well, that they are.
• 23:08
  Speaker B: Otherwise there's something inside.
• 23:09
  Speaker A: Yeah, they are there. It, it's, it's, it needs to be looked at. It does seem like they erupt at certain times and then they go away again. That's, that, that's why? It seems sometimes like it's an external.
• 23:26
  Speaker B: Thing because it's like there's always a season for worms, right?
• 23:29
  Speaker A: It's like everything's fine.
• 23:30
  Speaker B: Like in Florida. Yeah. In summer, there's the season for worms.
• 23:34
  Speaker A: There's in Hawaii. They have. When I was. There's spider season. And all of a sudden, sudden there's tons of spiders everywhere. Like, what the hell? They're everywhere and then they disappear. They're there for like a month. You think they're like, you walk into the house and there's spider webs. Like, where are they coming from? But. But they go away. But yeah, this is, this is. We have to look at this stuff. So who we become ultimately is down to what we're thinking about, what we're doing, what we're looking at, what we're continuously repeating. And what we initially started talking about was that one is external things like achieving success and money and fame and blah, blah, blah, blah, which you don't take with you. And. And it doesn't mean we're going to be happy either because we could have everything. I mean, you've probably seen, I mean, I doubt you've seen them personally, but a lot of people watching might have had some awareness of like the Kardashians and these, these different like TV shows of like the rich and famous or you've seen it in the newspapers. I remember Britney Spears when I, after a few years of practicing meditation, Britney Spears, she shaved her head. Do you remember that? I don't know if you're in America. Britney Spears, right? I was, because it was front page news for some reason. I remember, like I was.
• 25:01
  Speaker B: I know, right? You would think, oh my God.
• 25:05
  Speaker A: I'm not even in America. Right? So like just walking around and there's pictures of Britney Spears like smashing stuff up and shaving her head. And I looked at it and I was like, how bizarre. Like, you got this person who was really sweet and lovely and she's loads of money and fame and she's totally lost it and looks like a total nutcase. So just because someone has physical success doesn't mean that they're happy. It doesn't mean that they've become internally inspiring and joyful and blissful. So spiritual work. It really is about having a good look internally and saying, is this a healthy ecosystem within myself? Is it a pleasant place to be being me? Is my existence just as a being something that is to be celebrated and I enjoy? Or am I constantly conflicted and in agony and internally off and is my mind Attacking me. Because that, that's, that's real stuff right there. That's something that's internal and it goes with us when we die. Whereas all this other stuff isn't absolutely, you know.
• 26:19
  Speaker B: All right. You know, one of the things that is very important because in the last episode we spoke about metrics and having, you know, our own internal metrics and stuff. You know how much ever enthusiasm I have, right, for saying, no, no, I'm not going to be in this achievement mode anymore. I'm going to really become, you know, some kind of improvement, right. There has to be some kind of self progress, some kind of benefit, some kind of attainments that are coming. That's when your life feels meaningful because there has to be growth and self progress. Right. If there's no growth and self progress, then you, you don't feel it's, you know, you're attaining anything. And so. But I feel for all of that, right. We need determination. Yeah, I could have a ton of enthusiasm. I could have a ton of, you know, lists on, you know, this is what I am going to become and not achieve. I could have a ton of.
• 27:32
  Speaker A: Yeah, most people wouldn't have this, but.
• 27:33
  Speaker B: If I don't have, most people have.
• 27:36
  Speaker A: A list of what they want to.
• 27:37
  Speaker B: Do or become, right, Right. But if I don't have determination to really go after and not give up, I need determination. I have to do this, right. I. We give up too soon. And so I feel determination is very, very important in this.
• 27:58
  Speaker A: So what is practically speaking, what is determination in your opinion? Like, what does that look like practically? If you're determined, how do you know you're determined?
• 28:11
  Speaker B: I don't give up. And I know the difference between what is right for me. I loved what you were just sharing about your internal environment. You know, is it healthy? Is it, you know, is it inspiring for me? Right? That's what you said. Is it inspiring for me? Right. Are you happy? Are you inspired? Are you doing all of those things? So determination really is. I know what that is. And not only I know what that is, but I know how to get there. Not only I know how to get there, but I don't give up on the steps to getting there.
• 28:59
  Speaker A: Right. So you keep, keep going forward even if you don't feel like him.
• 29:07
  Speaker B: Right.
• 29:07
  Speaker A: So you know what you need to do first, know.
• 29:10
  Speaker B: Yeah, you know, then you know the steps and then you don't give up on it.
• 29:16
  Speaker A: Well, I think a lot of people know what to do or what the steps are, but they don't do anything about it. I mean, that's. That's quite common, isn't it? Where. Where, like, I mean, I know, I've known for a long time certain things I need to do and I haven't done them because. Probably because of lack of determination. Jeremy. So one is knowing and the other is doing it and doing it long enough, isn't it? And it seems to me that the key thing here is to do things that are good for us when we don't feel like doing them. That seems to be like the real, the crux of the whole thing is when we say, you know what? I'd rather not do this. I'd rather just sit around and do something else, or I'd rather do this other thing, but I'm going to do this anyway because ultimately that's better for me. So how do you. Shireen, you're better at this than I am by far. So a round of applause to Shireen for this. How do you do stuff that's hard to do when you don't feel like it?
• 30:21
  Speaker B: The resistance I feel inside is harder than actually doing it. Me thinking about it is harder. And we were talking about this recently, that. Right. Thinking about it is harder.
• 30:41
  Speaker A: Thinking about it is hard. I have it on my board. Yeah. I think thinking about it is harder than just doing it. Yeah.
• 30:48
  Speaker B: Right. So it. I feel the discomfort. There was this one time in one podcast you said the discomfort actually is just a few seconds.
• 30:58
  Speaker A: It's the front end of it, let's say.
• 31:00
  Speaker B: Even if it's a minute. Even if it's a minute. Right. 60 seconds. I can sit in discomfort for 60 seconds and just keep going. And comes to the next one. Next virtue I feel we badly need in life is tolerance.
• 31:17
  Speaker A: Yes.
• 31:18
  Speaker B: Is this.
• 31:20
  Speaker A: Yes. A big, big need.
• 31:24
  Speaker B: And tolerance for discomfort. Tolerance for not getting what I want. Tolerance. Let's say I decided I don't want to watch anymore YouTube. Tolerance for, you know, feeling I need to watch, you know, how can I do this? All of that.
• 31:41
  Speaker A: Yeah. Tolerating the withdrawal symptoms of not doing something. Yeah.
• 31:48
  Speaker B: Yes. So tolerance is absolutely essential.
• 31:52
  Speaker A: Yeah. Because it doesn't last forever, does it? The pain.
• 31:56
  Speaker B: Right. The discomfort doesn't last forever. The pain doesn't last forever. And that you feel such a sense of accomplishment.
• 32:03
  Speaker A: Yeah. Afterwards, the next day, you feel great. Yeah. You feel like if I'm thinking of doing something bad for me and then I decide not to do it, it's unpleasant in the moment, but the next day or later on, I think, yay. That was such A great success. It brings us joy, doesn't it? Hooray success.
• 32:21
  Speaker B: You know, like this morning, right? This morning I did like a 36 hours water fast and I did not want to go to the gym this morning. I was giving every excuse in the book, right, Why I shouldn't go. And then I just said, no, let's just let me go. And I felt so good afterwards, right? I could totally give myself excuse. I don't have the energy to do this right now. I could have totally given myself the excuse and I would be fine, but I wouldn't have experienced the enjoyment of afterwards how good I felt.
• 33:03
  Speaker A: We need to do a podcast just on you helping people to do hard stuff. Because honestly, this is one of the biggest problems in the world. You're much better at it than I think you realize because you've lived a very disciplined life for a long time and you've had to run a center and get up early and do all this stuff even when you're tired. Most people don't do any of that stuff at all. So they're not used to it. But so what, so what do you say to yourself? How do you like, let's walk through exactly what happened with the gym. Because normally people would say, well, there's no point. I come, I'll go tomorrow. So what happened with you exactly?
• 33:43
  Speaker B: Okay, so the 36 hour water fast was not a good idea because I had really bad, what would you call it, blood sugar issues, like lightheaded and stuff to the point where I couldn't. Lightheaded and I couldn't get up, get up out of bed for my morning meditation. And then I had to do class and all of that. So I ate something before class because otherwise there's no way I could go do a class with the way I was feeling. And so I'm sitting in class and I'm, you know, doing the class and I'm thinking, you know what? Today, no gym.
• 34:25
  Speaker A: That's it. You know, I don't need to.
• 34:27
  Speaker B: I totally. I'm thinking I'm just not gonna do it. I don't need to do this. Yeah, yeah.
• 34:31
  Speaker A: It's.
• 34:32
  Speaker B: My body's hurting, I'm tired, my head is light and whatever. Right? No gym. And then so I made up my mind by the end of class, no gym.
• 34:43
  Speaker A: When Was not happening today.
• 34:46
  Speaker B: Yeah, no, yeah. But then I started afterwards, right? I started like in the center. You have to do so many things. People are coming, you have to talk to people, people are calling you. So all of this is Happening, So I'm not able to go and rest. And so I was doing all of these things, and I was thinking, if I can do all of these things, I can go to the gym. And in the gym, we have a class. It's a class I go to. And the instructor always says, if you can't do something, just do whatever you can. So that was my mindset. I'm going to go there, and if I'm not able to do something, I'll just do whatever I can. I think the thing is, you don't want to not do anything. Do something.
• 35:33
  Speaker A: Yeah, do something. So you were like. So you said to yourself, even if I don't do the full thing, I'll do something. And that's. That's that. So that was like your internal commitment to yourself. I'll do the best I can. And I can kind of like not push myself too much. Yeah. How did it actually go?
• 35:56
  Speaker B: And I mean, it all worked. It went well. I did everything. And I'm still standing. And I'm fine. I'm fine. And so it all gives.
• 36:07
  Speaker A: We should all give. Shireen, wherever you are. No, I think it's great. Honestly. Most people just. I mean, you're way more disciplined than I am. I'm too, like, oh, I'll do what I feel like I. I have to learn this, just this from you, actually, and from life, you know, I mean, I'd still get a lot of stuff done, actually, but this is very. You should do a few sessions on this. But anyway, carry on. So you went to the gym, you got in the car, you went there, you did everything. It turned out it was fine. And then how do you feel when you got back?
• 36:38
  Speaker B: Great. Great. And I feel such a sense of accomplishment. Right. Because I feel I didn't give in to Maya. I didn't give into my laziness. I didn't give into all these excuses. And I feel this little. Little wins that we have. Right. That builds determination.
• 36:57
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 36:58
  Speaker B: And I had just had to tolerate a little bit. I was a little tired, but I just had to tolerate a little bit. It was not so bad. It was not as bad as I thought it would be.
• 37:09
  Speaker A: Yeah.
• 37:10
  Speaker B: But, you know, in any habit, right? Like, you were one time telling me in any habit to, like, do a little bit, like, let's say you don't want to do something. Let's take flossing, right? You don't want to floss that day. You're tired. Don't want to floss that day before you go to Bed. Just tell yourself, I'll floss two teeth. Yeah, and just floss two teeth. And if you really feel up to it after the two teeth, you can floss more. But don't go into thinking, oh, I have to do all of this, and I have to floss all this teeth. I have to do all of this. No, just do a little bit of sling.
• 37:50
  Speaker A: Absolutely.
• 37:51
  Speaker B: Because that's the starting, is the initial starting is the problem.
• 37:55
  Speaker A: That is definitely. I mean, I find the same thing when I'm in the house. Like, I might be working on a project or I'm watching some random thing, and I'm like, I can't be bothered to go for a walk right now. And I'm like, michael, get out the house. And then I get out of the house, and I'm like, this is the. This is great. And I don't want to come back. Do you know what I mean? But getting out of the house, turning the laptop off and, like, getting my shoes on and getting my water and getting out, that's the hard bit. That's definitely the hardest bit, is that first little bit.
• 38:29
  Speaker B: Right, Right.
• 38:32
  Speaker A: So all these things, they all add up.
• 38:34
  Speaker B: Instead of thinking I don't want to do. Right. Instead of thinking I don't want to do, just tell yourself, I will do two minutes of.
• 38:42
  Speaker A: I'll do a little bit.
• 38:43
  Speaker B: I'll just get out of the house. I'll just do.
• 38:46
  Speaker A: Yeah. Now that. I mean, sometimes.
• 38:48
  Speaker B: And even if you just end up doing a little bit, it's better than not doing.
• 38:51
  Speaker A: That's right. Yeah. I find that even, like, let's say the weather's not good, or sometimes I'll just go out real quick, and I might not be out very long, but it builds. Keeps the habit of leaving and doing something or meditation. Let me just sit here for two minutes. But it ends up extending, you know, so all of these things, they all help us become something different, don't they? That. That's. That's where we're going with this, is it? Little things like that, they gradually change our consciousness and even, like, thinking joy. I'm. One of my favorite things is infinite joy. Infinite joy. So when I think infinite joy, infinite joy makes me smile. Because I've thought this millions of times now in my head. It's like I just think infinite joy a few times, and I'm like, oh, I feel so much better. Ah. You know, you don't have to, like, do this hard, hard things all the time. But it just builds and builds.
• 39:54
  Speaker B: Right. You know, one of the things I've noticed about whether it's meditation or whether it's anything else in life, if there is self progress, if there is growth, there is happiness. That is the secret. If you don't feel self progress, if you feel you're not growing, you can't be happy. You know, we all want happiness. Who doesn't want happiness? Everyone wants happiness. But then we go after thinking, oh, maybe the next, you know, special shoes or the next Louis Vuitton bag or something that's going to give me happiness, right? But that's not the way life works, right? Whatever it is, the next physical thing is going to give me happiness, or the next relationship is going to give me happiness or whatever. But you have to feel a sense of growth.
• 40:57
  Speaker A: You've got to keep growing that Louis handbag collection for sure. It's where would we be without our Louis handbags? But.
• 41:12
  Speaker B: You know, I want to double click on something you said before. You were talking about people and you were talking about, there is the loving people, right? They're very, very loving. And then the people who actually do stuff and they're totally on one side and they ignore everything else. A few months back, I was watching someone, some video someone sent me, and they were so loving, so loving. I was thinking, what a sweet soul, right? What a sweet soul. And then later on I realized that in person, actually, the soul might not be as sweet, right? I don't know really that. That well, but that's what I heard. The soul might not be as sweet or doesn't carry. The soul doesn't carry their weight around or whatever, right? And then you realize that so much of our lives these days are being lived online, right? We are one thing online. And then after the cameras shut down, then we are.
• 42:29
  Speaker A: Yeah, I've heard a lot of that stuff. Yeah. Totally different person. They just shuts off and they.
• 42:35
  Speaker B: Totally different. Yeah, totally different person. And I feel there has to be alignment, you know, Just for a few likes. Just for a few.
• 42:46
  Speaker A: Yeah, I've seen it in Hawaii, like so many times. I've been like, to Hawaii, walking on the beach, right? And there are these women there getting the perfect shot. Like, I've been sitting there, like, doing meditation, and they're doing the same shot again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again. For like, I look around and I'm like, they're still there. This is incredible. And it's like they weren't actually there on the beach enjoying themselves. All they did was take. And once they got the shot, they left. So I just think. But you aren't actually here. Like you didn't like go in the water and enjoy it. It's like. So I think a lot of people, it's like that. It's all about how does it look? But they're not actually experiencing it in real life.
• 43:34
  Speaker B: So one of the things I feel that if it's not in alignment. So let's take these young women who are getting all these perfect shots on Hawaii beaches. Is there any growth from those perfect shots? Is there any growth that day from spending all of that day on the beach? Probably better at shots first that question might be better at taking shots first that question. And then the second question is about what you were saying. Your internal landscape. Is it happier? Is it thriving? Is it healthy? Right. So the is. And most importantly, am I in alignment with what I'm showing?
• 44:21
  Speaker A: Right.
• 44:22
  Speaker B: And so if all of these things are not being met right, then you're just worried about achieving. And there's no becoming, there is no growth, there's no progress. And you can't really be happy. You can have I don't know how many. What's the biggest Instagram following you could have 20 million Instagram followers. But that doesn't give you happiness, that doesn't give you contentment, that doesn't give you success. That's not success. No, because then you will go something else and you'll find something else you want.
• 44:59
  Speaker A: Yeah. So many people are very depressed, even though they got everything and, And I think it's a kick in the face because once you got everything you want and you. And you're depressed, it's even worse because you're like, what the hell? It's like double whammy right there. So. But yeah, when we move, when we, like, develop our habits or we change our thinking or we eat better or we, you know, do different things that are actually what we become as a result of that is belongs to us. You know, that's like an internal. So if I do a bunch of things that. That builds my inner joy, I. That's mine to keep. Do you know? I mean, that's, that's that's something real. Whereas if I just build my external world, it can all be taken away and I've nothing left. I'm just empty shell. So. Yeah, well, so that's basically the essence of what we're talking about today. Hopefully you found that useful. Everyone listening and think about your inner world and how you can build your joy in your happiness and your peace. And that is the real thing. That's the real deal. And you can't take a photograph of it because it's invisible inside of you. You can smile though, so that's good. All right, Shereen, so let's have your blessing, shall we? I know you've got lots of blessings here.
• 46:28
  Speaker B: Blessing, blessing, blessing.
• 46:30
  Speaker A: Just pick one.
• 46:31
  Speaker B: All right, I'm going. Random egolessness. Your light shines from deep within. A radiant expression of love defined by an innate sweetness and devoid of ego. You feel a connection with all of existence. This is a blessing for all of you listening. In this realization, you discover both freedom and peace.
• 47:11
  Speaker A: That's the real thing right there. Yay. Well, thank you so much for your presence. And may everyone listening become internally rich and externally rich as well. Why not? And have a beautiful, beautiful week, beautiful life, sending you so much love. Shanti.
• 47:39
  Speaker B: Om Shanti.