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From Burnout to Empowerment: Aneta Ardelian Kuzma's Journey to Purpose and Balance · Is Your Way In Your Way?

0:25
Cassandra: is your way, in your way podcast, and I'm your host, cassandra Crawley-Mayo, and for my new listeners out there, let me share with you what this podcast is all about.
0:35
Cassandra: It's for those individuals who are ready to move forward, ready to do something different, ready to change jobs, write a book, be a consultant, be a coach or something You're actually in your way.
0:49
Cassandra: I mean, you know there's certain things that's going on.
0:52
Cassandra: Maybe it's self-imposed barriers, you have imposter syndrome, I'm not quite sure, but whatever it is, you're stuck and haven't made that move yet.
1:00
Cassandra: So that's what this is all about, and we talk about topics on this podcast, about personal and business development, and also enable you to do some self-reflection.
1:12
Cassandra: So, in other words, we want you to mitigate some of those behaviors that you may have that is preventing you from living your best life on your terms.
1:23
Cassandra: And I have a special guest here today and her name is Aneta.
1:31
Cassandra: Hi, Aneta.
1:34
Aneta: How are you today, Cassandra?
1:35
Aneta: I'm so happy to be here.
1:37
Aneta: Thank you for having me on the show.
1:39
Cassandra: Absolutely.
1:40
Cassandra: And what I want to do now, Aneta, is my listeners love to hear a little background about you, so I'm going to read your bio.
1:50
Cassandra: So again, guys, I am so thrilled to announce our upcoming podcast today, and the title of our podcast today is creating more alignment, resulting to a Greater Sense of Balance.
2:06
Cassandra: And Aneta Ardelian Kuzma.
2:09
Cassandra: She's the CEO and founder of Ardelian Kuzma Group.
2:14
Cassandra: Aneta is a dynamic well-being coach and consultant who helps high-achieving professionals and entrepreneurs overcome burnout, redefine success and create sustainable routines for optimal health and purpose-filled lives.
2:35
Cassandra: After 25 successful years in the corporate world, Aneta embarked on a self-discovery journey that many of you guys are on self-discovery finding her coaching business to help others live the width, not just the length, of their lives.
2:50
Cassandra: So don't miss this insightful conversation.
2:53
Cassandra: Not only is she a certified coach, she is a yoga and meditation teacher, breathwork author, facilitator, host of Transformation Retreats and the host of Live the Width of Life podcast.
3:10
Cassandra: Wow, It sounds like she just got out of her way and doing some things that I think that she just loves to do, so let's talk about that.
3:21
Cassandra: Aneta, I'd like to know what was life before you became the CEO of your own organization?
3:28
Cassandra: What was life like for you?
3:31
Aneta: It's interesting it was such a different dichotomy Like I had this amazing relationship with my husband and my children and wonderful friends and, you know, spent a lot of time kind of focusing in on myself and self growth and development.
3:46
Aneta: But I also had this other part of life which was really hard.
3:50
Aneta: It was working in a very male dominated field.
3:55
Aneta: I was in banking for 22 years 25 years in corporate overall and I learned a lot.
4:00
Aneta: I grew a lot, and I always say nothing is wasted.
4:05
Aneta: But it was also very stressful.
4:07
Aneta: I found myself very burned out and I think a large part of that was because I knew that this was not what my purpose was.
4:15
Aneta: I knew that this is not really what I was supposed to be doing with my life and I kept saying, well, one day, or after the girls are ready to go to college, or after you know whatever fill in the blank is the Sunday syndrome.
4:30
Aneta: And until the day that I no longer could do that to myself, until the day that it just became really clear that it was time to make a change.
4:37
Aneta: And so that's what my life was like before I chose to start my company five and a half years ago.
4:44
Cassandra: Good for you.
4:45
Cassandra: So it sounds like you just made a decision.
4:48
Aneta: You so it sounds like you just made a decision, I made a decision.
4:50
Aneta: It was like a decision.
4:51
Aneta: And then the action, the little baby action steps, started afterwards until I got enough momentum and enough courage to actually choose to leave.
5:03
Cassandra: Yeah, exactly.
5:03
Cassandra: I wanted to reiterate that because most of my listeners are looking for courage or somebody that will inspire them or say something today that may change their life.
5:13
Cassandra: Who knows?
5:14
Cassandra: And we hope so anyway.
5:15
Cassandra: Now, when you transitioned out of corporate to your own business, what was that transition like?
5:23
Cassandra: Was it difficult to leave, or what was happening then?
5:28
Aneta: You know, there was a lot of feelings there, Um I, after I made the decision within my heart that it was time to leave it stayed for two years to get myself actually ready to leave, because I'm not a big, I wasn't a big risk taker and I knew that I wanted to do things and I really I was saying goodbye to a career, so I wanted to make sure I did it in the right way.
5:49
Aneta: So it was, um, it was interesting because I had these highs and lows of like I'm so excited, I'm going to start building this business, start getting these certifications.
6:00
Aneta: It was like the secret that I had, you know, with my husband and just a very few folks.
6:02
Aneta: But after I made the decision to leave, I was excited, and then I also fell into fear and so it was like constant elevation and contraction and so, um, it's, it's different.
6:17
Aneta: I mean, you're making a change, everything changes when you leave.
6:19
Aneta: A very regimented environment where you're meeting, your calendars is filled with things that other people have put on it, and the first day of not going to work and having a completely empty calendar like brand new calendar.
6:36
Aneta: It is like I've never experienced that Cause, even from the time we're little, we have stuff going on.
6:42
Aneta: It was the first time in my life where I said, well, don't screw it up, you got to figure this out yourself.
6:47
Aneta: Now it's up to you to decide what you do from this point forward and then after that, of course, it's been taking daily and perfect action towards the vision that I had for the life that you know I am continue to build.
7:01
Cassandra: Mm, hmm, let me ask you how did you know what you wanted to do?
7:08
Cassandra: Or you weren't quite sure, but you knew what you were in, was not it?
7:12
Aneta: Yeah, that's a really great question.
7:14
Aneta: I knew what I was doing was not it, and for many years I said to myself well, I'll just stay where I am until I figure it out.
7:22
Aneta: And that didn't happen.
7:25
Aneta: And so I said you know what I probably need to invest in a coach?
7:29
Aneta: And so I said you know what I probably need to invest in a coach?
7:33
Aneta: And it was the first time I worked with well, actually I worked with a coach in MBA school, but so that was my first exposure to working with the coach.
7:37
Aneta: And then I hired someone myself and said I need help because I don't know what this is.
7:43
Aneta: I don't know if I'm supposed to move to a new industry.
7:45
Aneta: I don't know if I'm supposed to move into the nonprofit space.
7:48
Aneta: I'm not sure exactly.
7:49
Aneta: I didn't think I actually wanted to be an entrepreneur, and when I went through the coaching process I fell in love with coaching, and my coach helped me to really remove any sort of barriers or limitations in my dreaming and my thinking, and so I got real big.
8:07
Aneta: I was like I want to write a book, I want to have a podcast, I want to do retreats all over the world, Like I started imagining things that I never thought were possible, and by doing that first and getting so excited about this vision for what I wanted, you cannot help but want to start taking action in that direction.
8:27
Aneta: It was exactly what I needed to get unstuck.
8:30
Cassandra: Oh, that's amazing.
8:31
Cassandra: That's great because you know we all have fear and oh yeah, and some people say, well, you need to face the fear.
8:39
Cassandra: So I just, you know, want my listeners I love your story because they have trepidations as well.
8:45
Cassandra: You know that they want to do and that's okay to give yourself permission.
8:50
Cassandra: You know to do that, and one of the things you did that support you is you hired a coach.
8:56
Cassandra: You found a coach.
8:58
Cassandra: What was your methodology in finding the right person for you?
9:03
Aneta: You know it's so interesting.
9:04
Aneta: I knew a woman.
9:07
Aneta: I became friends with someone, um, not like super close friends, but we still would get together a couple of times a year through a YWCA program.
9:15
Aneta: Um, she was a speaker, I knew she was a coach and we would meet together for lunch every once in a while, and so I kept in touch with her and I always said to her if I choose to hire or when I'm ready, I'm going to hire you, because I really respected her and she did it herself.
9:30
Aneta: So I saw that she had.
9:31
Aneta: Her life was proof of that.
9:38
Aneta: She was able to do it.
9:38
Aneta: We had a great rapport and, um, I just knew that it was someone that I could trust.
9:40
Aneta: I already had trust.
9:40
Aneta: I already knew what her style was.
9:42
Aneta: She has amazing energy, someone you want to be around, because her energy and laughter was contagious, and so those were some of the things that I was looking for is like who can I be with that I know has the skills, but also, from a chemistry perspective, is someone I want to spend time with because it's a very intimate relationship.
9:58
Aneta: It's a very important relationship.
10:00
Cassandra: It is, it is.
10:00
Cassandra: So that's wonderful that you found that right person.
10:03
Cassandra: Yeah and um, and I think a lot has to do.
10:07
Cassandra: Once you made that decision and you took action, I always say, when the student's ready, the teacher will appear.
10:13
Aneta: Of course.
10:14
Cassandra: Yeah, you probably never really thought of that until you really needed it.
10:17
Cassandra: And then all of a sudden, voila.
10:41
Aneta: Yeah, I know who I'm calling Exactly.
10:44
Cassandra: That's perfect.
10:45
Cassandra: Now, because of what you've experienced, I can see why.
10:50
Cassandra: What your passion is helping other people get unstuck, awaken them to their potential and their passion, their big dreams, their line, help support them in aligning their action.
11:01
Cassandra: How do you do that?
11:04
Aneta: Yeah, it's the first thing I always tell everyone is you need to start to dream again.
11:10
Aneta: You know, we really have forgotten what it's like to dream some big dreams for our lives.
11:15
Aneta: I think we've been told since we were young that you need to be realistic, you have to have a backup plan.
11:22
Aneta: You know, and um, and you have to be able to make a steady living, and all these things that you know.
11:28
Aneta: People who care for us tell us, and so I think we automatically go to the.
11:32
Aneta: Will I be able to figure out how to do this before we say what do I actually want?
11:37
Aneta: And so the first step is saying what are your values?
11:41
Aneta: What kind of a?
11:42
Aneta: What does success look like for you in your relationships, in your health, in your career?
11:48
Aneta: What are the things you want to be able to spend time?
11:51
Aneta: You know, where do you want to spend your time?
11:53
Aneta: Asking really important questions about how folks want to live, how they want to experience their human experience while they are here, and it might challenge everything they've ever learned, because society's expectations and society's definition of what success should be for us might look very different, and many of us find ourselves having achieved all the things we'd hope to achieve, sometimes even more, and say, oh my gosh, is this it?
12:20
Aneta: This can't possibly be it.
12:22
Aneta: So it's really getting them to a place to to dream again, to have a vision, and then working backwards to say, okay, let's talk about how we can get there and how does this align?
12:33
Aneta: And asking questions that are really important, like, how many hours do you want to work, what do you want to be able to do in your free time and this really opens people up and then also creating healthy habits.
12:46
Aneta: I think it's really important to focus in on devotion and self-care and routines that allow us to continue to play from this parasympathetic nervous system where we're able to do this type of work.
12:59
Aneta: Many of us are not able to even dream or vision if we are in a very stressful system you know, sympathetic nervous system because we're barely alive or trying to just survive.
13:11
Aneta: And so helping people create routines that are supports where they're going is really critical as well.
13:18
Cassandra: Right, okay, I always say surviving, but not thriving.
13:22
Cassandra: You know, as you live this life and you realize maybe at the end was I really living life?
13:30
Cassandra: Or Right yeah, exactly Exactly.
13:33
Cassandra: And I loved it when you talked about individuals that you talk to, like what's your dream, what are your values?
13:41
Cassandra: Because once I made my decision to leave corporate, write my book and I'm a mentor as well and I used to ask people from a scale of one to 10, where are you in living your best life?
13:54
Cassandra: And people like what Just never had the time to think about what that meant and what does success look like to them.
14:04
Cassandra: So, yeah, so I get that I had to do the same thing to myself.
14:07
Cassandra: Wow, yeah, how do you support people?
14:14
Cassandra: Because this is something releasing those limiting beliefs, those stories, those fears to get unstuck, like, how do you help them release that?
14:25
Cassandra: You know, like the imposter syndrome and I'm not worthy, or those limiting beliefs, and a lot of that comes from their experiences, you know so.
14:37
Cassandra: So I know that was something that you support them in doing.
14:41
Cassandra: How do you do that?
14:43
Aneta: Yeah, it's such a important topic because so many of us, you know, myself included continue to have to do the work on this.
14:50
Aneta: Many of us, you know, myself included, continue to have to do the work on this.
14:54
Aneta: Um one we have to acknowledge we are not our thoughts.
14:55
Aneta: And, um, I also encourage, uh, all my clients to not take on the identities of their thoughts or take on these identities like imposter syndrome.
15:05
Aneta: Um, I actually it's one that really bothers me because I think that we have, we've normalized it by calling it a syndrome.
15:14
Aneta: It was actually something that was a phenomenon that was, you know, written about, because it was strange that these very successful women, who are very educated and accomplished, were having feelings that they weren't worthy, and so I think it's a worthiness issue.
15:32
Aneta: So a lot of times I'll ask people let's examine what these beliefs are and are they really true, and trying to bring folks to a very objective perspective, to actually start to talk about some of the fears, the limiting, doubts, beliefs.
15:46
Aneta: It's important to get them all down.
15:48
Aneta: Do a fear exercise, really spend some time saying is this a high, medium or a low risk to your life?
15:54
Aneta: How could you minimize some of these risks?
15:57
Aneta: And then, what if the complete opposite were true?
16:01
Aneta: And that's a fear exercise I built.
16:03
Aneta: I saw Tim Ferriss do a TEDx talk on and he talked about doing this very similar stoic exercise around fear and um before he actually wrote his four hour work week book.
16:17
Aneta: Um, he didn't think he could leave the company that he was managing to go on vacation and he was severely burned out.
16:24
Aneta: He went through this exercise.
16:26
Aneta: He decided he was like, okay, I'm going to go for a week and a half.
16:28
Aneta: He ended up staying for months.
16:30
Aneta: He was gone for months and wrote his book, which, of course, changed the trajectory of his life.
16:34
Aneta: But he really talked about how using stoicism was helpful.
16:38
Aneta: So that's the one thing that is really important is really examining these fears.
16:42
Aneta: Where do they come from?
16:43
Aneta: What are they?
16:43
Aneta: Are they really true and what else could we believe if this wasn't true?
16:49
Cassandra: And I think that when we do that, it really diffuses the fears when we're able to approach it from a very critical thinking perspective and not an emotional state.
17:01
Cassandra: Mm, hmm, so Are you what I would say?
17:04
Cassandra: Yeah, I want to talk about that carriage muscle, you know is that courage muscle, a part of what you just talked about.
17:16
Aneta: Yeah, I think so, because one of the things that I think is important is and I'm doing for myself right now is choosing to be out of my comfort zone every day, choosing to do something mentally, maybe physically, maybe spiritually to pull yourself out of the comfort zone, cause when we do that we grow.
17:37
Aneta: And it doesn't have to be something that is extremely frightening.
17:42
Aneta: It could be just a small step, right, it could be working out just a little bit harder, it could be running.
17:48
Aneta: If you walk, it could be, you know, starting a gratitude practice.
17:52
Aneta: It could be forgiving someone and making a call.
17:55
Aneta: That's really difficult.
17:56
Aneta: Each of these things, when we intentionally choose to show up for ourselves in a courageous way, we'll build that courage muscle and, over time, the things that used to hold you back suddenly just don't and you just continue to elevate and grow.
18:10
Cassandra: Yeah, and you have individuals, your clients, do this for 30 days.
18:15
Aneta: Well, most of my clients, my one-on-one clients are with me for about six months, and so we spend a lot of time working through this.
18:21
Aneta: On average, most of my programs are six months, but I have some clients that are a little bit shorter.
18:27
Cassandra: Okay, cause I read somewhere that you called it the 30 day challenge.
18:31
Cassandra: Oh, I did.
18:33
Aneta: Yeah, I had a 30 day challenge and also the month of March.
18:36
Aneta: In my live, the width of your life book is all about 30 days of courage, challenges to to really grow that muscle.
18:45
Aneta: So, yeah, that was something that I did once online for about 30 days.
18:50
Cassandra: Talk a little bit about your book.
18:52
Cassandra: What?
18:52
Cassandra: What triggered that book?
18:55
Aneta: Well, I've always wanted to write, Um, I've always been a writer.
18:58
Aneta: I'll say that I definitely do claim that identity as a writer.
19:01
Aneta: I love to write.
19:02
Aneta: I always have and um, and journaled for most of my life.
19:06
Aneta: It's just something that is a personal practice.
19:09
Aneta: It's just something that is a personal practice, and I made a decision that I really, as part of my business, wanted to write books.
19:19
Aneta: And so, um, and then I you know, sometimes milestones help us, um, activate some of those goals a little bit faster.
19:24
Aneta: So I said you know what I want to, the year I turned 50, I want to publish my book.
19:28
Aneta: And so I did.
19:29
Aneta: And, um, I wasn't sure if I was going to self publish or publish with a publisher.
19:35
Aneta: And, um, I met and spoke to a publisher.
19:39
Aneta: I actually went through a book proposal challenge, a program, and she wanted me to write a.
19:45
Aneta: Um, not the book that I wrote, but she wanted me to write more of a business book, like a chapter book on what it means to live the width of your life.
19:53
Aneta: And for me, the vision I had for my book was the people that are my clients.
19:58
Aneta: They're busy, they're executives, they're professionals, they're entrepreneurs, they're students, they're people who have very rich lives.
20:05
Aneta: We have so many self-help books and we consume them like they're candy and then we put them on the shelf and we don't apply nearly any of the information that we take in.
20:13
Aneta: We might reference it at some point and for me, I wanted a daily.
20:18
Aneta: I wanted something that was on someone's nightstand, something, a book that people gave us gifts, where every single day, you read something that inspires you, that challenges you, that poses a journal prompt or a challenge, and you take the small daily action.
20:34
Aneta: So from the beginning of January 1st until the end of the year, December 31st, you will have experienced transformation in your life if you go through the book, but in a way that's bite-sized and very easy, and I think that's the feedback.
20:48
Aneta: People say I love doing this and a lot of my clients have said wow, I've started journaling again from first time since like middle school, and so I launched the journal that accompanies the book.
20:59
Cassandra: Actually, a year later, who you partnered with to support you in this book.
21:09
Cassandra: You like, that's not what I want to do.
21:11
Cassandra: You know how other people can sway you and that's not really what you want to do, but you don't say that.
21:18
Cassandra: So you were very clear on what it was that you wanted, and look at the outcome.
21:22
Aneta: Oh you know what, cassandra, though I should say, um, I sat on it.
21:26
Aneta: So after the publisher told me that I sat on the book for six months and I didn't do anything because I thought, okay, I'm going to have to rewrite this and I'm going to have to start over, and one day in my meditation I hear, I heard a very clear, distinct voice, like, as I like channeled from God, that said you wrote it, you already wrote your book.
21:50
Aneta: Go publish your book.
21:51
Aneta: And I did.
21:53
Aneta: And within a month I was like, let's go.
21:56
Cassandra: Okay, Good for you.
21:57
Cassandra: So you did not.
21:58
Cassandra: Did you use that same publisher?
22:01
Aneta: Oh no, I self-published.
22:02
Aneta: Right, okay, I self-published.
22:05
Cassandra: Yeah, okay, great.
22:07
Cassandra: Now you talked about um.
22:08
Cassandra: I liked when you said you said something like aligning your daily choices to your dreams and goals.
22:17
Cassandra: Provide some examples of that.
22:20
Cassandra: Like you know, like my listeners, they have dreams, they have goals.
22:24
Cassandra: So how would they go about aligning their daily choices that align with their dreams and goals to create balance daily?
22:31
Aneta: choices that align with their dreams and goals to create balance.
22:34
Aneta: Yeah, so I believe that why so many of us actually two-third, one-third of the world population in a recent study said that they're out of balance is because we don't align our daily choices to our values and our goals.
22:45
Aneta: And what I mean by that, that is, if you are not in control of your schedule, where you spend your time, and it doesn't align to what's most important to you, you will feel out of balance.
22:56
Aneta: So, if you want to, if you tell me that your wellness and health and wellness and wellbeing is very important to your mental health, and meanwhile you don't find time to eat, you're not going outside getting sunshine, you're not sleeping, you're not having any sort of self-care, you'll feel out of balance because you're not making time for it.
23:18
Aneta: If you tell me your relationships are important and you're missing your kids' activities at school, or you're not home for dinner, or you don't have time to spend with your friends, or your family doesn't see you, you're going to be out of balance.
23:30
Aneta: So it starts with identifying what is most important to me and how do I put those things on my calendar first and make sure that I show up for those things that are really important, because you will never regret saying yes to the things that align to where it is that you're going.
23:46
Aneta: You will always have regret if you keep saying no to those things in favor of something else that really, in the long run, is not going to be what is a successful life.
23:59
Cassandra: Like you made me think of.
24:01
Cassandra: I was at a speaking engagement and one of the things you know I asked individuals what were their dreams and you know, what were their goals that they want to accomplish maybe in a year, and one person said that she want to accomplish maybe in a year.
24:11
Cassandra: And one person said that she wanted to move to Paris.
24:14
Cassandra: And I'm like, okay, well, what's stopping you?
24:18
Cassandra: Tell us about that, you know.
24:20
Cassandra: So I was thinking about.
24:22
Cassandra: You know how she could align her choices with that dream.
24:27
Cassandra: You know, like, like, what are some ways she could have aligned her choices with that dream?
24:34
Aneta: Yeah, I would.
24:34
Aneta: I would say what are some of the big milestones that you would need in order to make this come true?
24:40
Aneta: So one might be which district do you want to live in Paris?
24:44
Aneta: Spend put half an hour on your calendar to figure out where it is you'd like to move.
24:50
Aneta: The next would be hour on your calendar to figure out where it is you'd like to move.
24:54
Aneta: The next would be do you need to get a visa?
24:55
Aneta: You know, do some research on what would it take in order for you to make this happen.
24:58
Aneta: Do you need to hire an immigration lawyer?
25:00
Aneta: You know, ask if somebody put a post on Facebook or somewhere else and see if people have it.
25:05
Aneta: It's really spending the time to take all of the big, big, big dreams and put them into small, bite-sized pieces and then literally put them on your calendar and and make sure that they align to the date that you set.
25:20
Aneta: One of my clients today she is going to publish a book.
25:22
Aneta: We picked the date which is going to be on her birthday and we worked backwards and I was like okay, so the very first thing you need to do is get a draft to me, and it's by this date and this many weeks, because in order for this to happen, here's what you got to do and start putting it on your calendar.
25:38
Aneta: How much time are you spending each day to work on your draft?
25:40
Aneta: And when we are able to do that one, it takes a sense of pressure away from us because we're like, oh, there's a plan.
25:48
Aneta: And then when you make them so small in bite size and you put them on your calendar, you just have to show up for yourself and every time you say yes, you're one tiny step closer.
26:00
Aneta: And if you say no, then the question is is this really this important to you?
26:05
Aneta: And what are you saying yes to instead of your dream.
26:08
Aneta: So that's the way I would kind of work through it.
26:11
Cassandra: Okay, and that's definitely achievable, it's so achievable.
26:15
Cassandra: And another thing with it to me is you're like an accountability partner.
26:21
Cassandra: You know somebody, that's okay.
26:23
Cassandra: I told her this is what I really want to do.
26:26
Cassandra: So I really you know by this time, and that's helpful as well, you know, in order to get it done.
26:34
Aneta: And anybody can be that partner for you Cas sandra, it's so important that you raised the.
26:38
Aneta: You know it could be your coach, it could be a loved one, it could be a friend, it could be um making a declaration on the social media posts Like, hey, I'm going to, I signed up for my first marathon, can't wait to share my progress with you.
26:51
Aneta: Whatever it is that um.
26:53
Aneta: But it's important to ask people Like I have.
26:55
Aneta: Some of my clients want me to text them every week and say, hey, did you exercise?
27:00
Aneta: Did you do what you said you were going to do?
27:02
Aneta: How's this going?
27:03
Aneta: And some are like, please don't, I'll give you an update when I see you.
27:06
Aneta: So it's important to know, because you don't want to overstep, but you also want to be able to support people in the way that they need support.
27:16
Cassandra: Right, what a great segue.
27:18
Cassandra: Let's talk about the power of meditation, yoga, breath work that shifts your energy to promote the transformation for you.
27:29
Aneta: Oh man.
27:30
Aneta: I love talking about this the transformation for you, oh man I love talking about this.
27:37
Aneta: So I've been practicing yoga for 30 years.
27:38
Aneta: It's like a long time.
27:39
Cassandra: Yeah.
27:39
Aneta: So, when it was like VHS tapes and and at home, you know, on those big TVs that we used to have and yoga was my foray really into connecting my mind, my body and my spirit in a way, and also learning to really gain control of my mind and my thoughts and being an observer.
27:59
Aneta: And it was what kept me sane as a young mom, when I was trying to do something for myself while my kids were sleeping at 430 in the morning in my kitchen, practicing, you know, and I couldn't leave to go anywhere.
28:12
Aneta: And then, um, through yoga, I learned, um, some breath work a little bit through yoga practices but not as much as today and also meditation.
28:23
Aneta: And so when I added meditation which was later in my career, I was actually able to really regulate my nervous system, which is very important when I found myself very, very stressed and burned out.
28:34
Aneta: It was a way to continue to return back to the present moment, really focus in on what's within my control.
28:41
Aneta: We really incorporate mindfulness practices every single day and I practice every day, regardless where you are.
28:49
Aneta: You can close your eyes and you can drop in and, um, it's not, doesn't matter if you're on a cushion, if you're, you know, sitting on a chair.
28:59
Aneta: You could be doing it on an airplane.
29:00
Aneta: I meditate during takeoff a lot.
29:00
Aneta: I'm not scared to fly, I just find it really relaxing to do it.
29:04
Aneta: Um, and then I would say, about two years ago I was at a conference and, uh, a woman talked about breathwork, the power of somatic trauma, informed breathwork as a way not only to regulate our nervous system but as a way to actually release trauma in the body, to really get tapped into what we are storing within ourselves, to elevate, to create some transformational change.
29:32
Aneta: And that session alone cracked me open.
29:36
Aneta: I opened my eyes, didn't know what just happened.
29:40
Aneta: All I know that I was changed and I signed up the very next morning to be a facilitator for her program breathwork facilitator.
29:47
Aneta: It was so impactful to to me and every cell in my body was like you need to do this.
29:52
Aneta: And I found, through the power of breathwork, such healing for myself and continued healing and just peeling back the layers where you're discovering more and more things that you need to release and to heal from.
30:04
Aneta: And then being able to incorporate that with my clients has really made a positive shift in my coaching business as well.
30:12
Cassandra: Wow, that's incredible.
30:14
Cassandra: The breath work, that's great oh it's amazing and it's free.
30:20
Aneta: It is cradle to grave.
30:21
Aneta: It is our constant companion.
30:22
Aneta: This breath and you can control it and move from the sympathetic to the parasympathetic nervous system.
30:30
Aneta: It can impact you physically, emotionally, spiritually.
30:33
Aneta: It's absolutely amazing.
30:35
Cassandra: Wow, I'm going to have to try that.
30:37
Aneta: Yes, thursdays at noon Eastern time I do a free class.
30:41
Aneta: It's a group, anybody can join.
30:43
Aneta: Hope your audience looks into that.
30:46
Cassandra: Sure Sure Wow, sure, sure Wow.
31:04
Aneta: Based on the work you've done, your experiences, you've had the transformation that you have endured and will continue to do so.
31:07
Aneta: Do you think women can have it all?
31:08
Aneta: I think that the what comes to mind when we hear that was the old belief or that, yeah, you can have the relationship and have the family and have this amazing personal life and also have this career and do it in a very masculine way.
31:27
Aneta: And I guess the question is what does it all mean for each individual person?
31:33
Aneta: And once you define what that is and what success looks like, then we absolutely can design a life to align to that.
31:43
Aneta: But it does require boundaries, it requires prioritizing the things that are most important in our life and it probably will require making some changes to the way that we automatically have been operating.
31:57
Aneta: So that's probably what I would do with my clients is say what does that mean to you?
32:05
Cassandra: to have it all Exactly.
32:07
Cassandra: Yeah, I read something when I was working and preparing myself for this podcast.
32:15
Cassandra: I saw you had something in regards to can women?
32:19
Cassandra: Do you believe women could have it all?
32:21
Cassandra: And I certainly agree with you.
32:24
Cassandra: You know there used to be a saying that says, well, you can't have everything I'm like.
32:28
Cassandra: Well, why not, Depending on what it is that you want?
32:30
Cassandra: Says, well, you can't have everything I'm like well, why not?
32:32
Aneta: Depending on what?
32:32
Cassandra: it is that you want Exactly.
32:33
Cassandra: Let's talk through this and see, you know, you know um something that's achievable and realistic.
32:39
Cassandra: I mean, let's not, you know, go crazy with it.
32:43
Cassandra: But yeah, I concur with you.
32:45
Cassandra: Um another thing you talked about how, how routines could create freedom, how so.
32:57
Aneta: So I see that much of the stress that people have is because they're scattered, they're not focused, they can't get everything done that they want to, so they jump out of bed and check their email, start tackling things as they're coming through.
33:14
Aneta: It is like fight or flight all day long, and routines and choosing to say how do I need to nourish and fulfill myself mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally in order to be the best version of myself personally and professionally is the way that you're going to get there.
33:35
Aneta: And that's why I say it's so important for folks to say what are you doing within the first hour that you wake up.
33:41
Cassandra: Yeah.
33:42
Aneta: If you're checking your phone phone first thing, guess what you are consuming someone else's agenda before you've even had time to have a thought, to breathe, to take a moment to reflect, to say thank you, to express any gratitude, you are already on your way.
33:56
Aneta: And guess what?
33:56
Aneta: That's not a winning strategy long-term.
33:59
Aneta: And if you're doing that before you go to bed and then it disrupts your sleep all night long and then you're waking up thinking about all things you're not getting done, that's not going to be successful and it's not sustainable long-term.
34:10
Aneta: Having the routines defining what those things are that you know are your non-negotiables and being committed to it where it becomes such a strong discipline and devotion is what's going to give you the freedom to be able to do all the things that you need to do.
34:27
Aneta: And most people think I don't have time and I would say we do.
34:32
Aneta: We all have the same.
34:33
Aneta: I always used to say Beyonce has 24 hours in the day, so do I like.
34:37
Aneta: It's the same thing.
34:37
Aneta: And you know we each get to choose what we do with that time and out of how many waking hours that we have.
34:45
Aneta: If you slept eight hours, 16 hours, it's like a thousand minutes a day.
34:49
Aneta: You absolutely have 30 minutes or 60 minutes to focus in on the things that you need to do for yourself.
34:55
Cassandra: Exactly and have to definitely be intentional.
34:58
Aneta: So intentional.
34:59
Cassandra: Yeah, because that will help minimize those habitual things that you do that's not enabling you to do what it is that you want to do, because it's a habit scrolling my phone, or it's a habit getting up late, jumping out of bed, you know.
35:12
Cassandra: So, yeah, yeah, that would definitely change the trajectory of your life If you have the healthy, balanced routines.
35:26
Cassandra: Absolutely yeah.
35:28
Cassandra: So I like you.
35:30
Cassandra: What would you tell my listeners who are in their way of living their best life on their terms?
35:38
Cassandra: What is it that you could share with them that perhaps not only inspire them, but a gem that can maybe enable them to pivot and say, wow, you know, it's kind of like you, like you made the decision and you took action, like, ok, you know whether you got sick and tired of being sick and tired or you burn out or whatever.
36:01
Cassandra: So what nuggets would you share with them today?
36:07
Aneta: It is never too late.
36:09
Aneta: If you're alive, you're breathing, it is never too late or too early to decide that you want to do something different.
36:18
Aneta: Many life choices are not binary.
36:21
Aneta: Um, many life choices are not binary.
36:23
Aneta: You don't have to quit your job and start a business.
36:26
Aneta: You can stay in your job and also start a business.
36:33
Aneta: You can do be in school and start a side hustle.
36:34
Aneta: We often limit ourselves because we think that we only have this or that as options and there's so many more other options.
36:41
Aneta: I'd say get creative about that.
36:50
Aneta: It's important to have a community of other people who support you.
36:51
Aneta: You don't have to do this on your own.
36:52
Aneta: Get the support.
36:52
Aneta: It could be a professional, it could be someone else who's done it, who's just a couple of steps ahead of you.
36:56
Aneta: It could be a mentor, it could be a guide, it could be a podcast, it could be YouTube.
37:00
Aneta: There are so many free resources if you need free resources and there are people who have done it so, um, you don't need to do it alone.
37:08
Aneta: Um, and you don't have to do it all overnight.
37:11
Aneta: It is perfectly okay to take tiny, small, imperfect action every single day, and all of all of those things are lining up towards the goal that you want.
37:22
Aneta: You never know how quickly one day your dream life is going to turn into your normal life.
37:29
Cassandra: Good, that's good, wow, and that you have definitely shared some impactful gems with my listeners, and I'm so hopeful that things you've said, your experiences, have definitely resonated and I believe that there's someone that's listening that is going to make a decision, and once they make that decision, they're going to take action and I'm grateful that you were the catalyst to help to do that.
38:03
Cassandra: So I'm so appreciative that you were a guest on Is your Way, in your Way, and I would love to have you on again one day.
38:13
Aneta: Oh my gosh.
38:14
Aneta: Thank you, cassandra.
38:15
Aneta: I really enjoyed our conversation.
38:16
Aneta: Would love to have you on my show as well, and, um, if anybody is curious about meditation or yoga or breath work, or wants to even have a free call just to talk about anything that I shared, um, you can go to my website on that's a kuzmagroup.
38:36
Aneta: com, and find all of these free resources and, check out my breath work class on Thursdays.
38:43
Aneta: You don't even have to turn your camera on, you can have it off and just experience it in the comfort of your home.
38:49
Cassandra: Right, and that's another way that they can get in touch with you as well, right?
38:52
Aneta: Yes, absolutely.
38:54
Cassandra: Okay, okay.
38:55
Cassandra: Well, listeners, this is the end of this podcast, but not the end of is your way, in your way, and I like to thank you for listening.
39:04
Cassandra: I also would love for you to share this with someone that you believe that this would resonate with.
39:10
Cassandra: So, as I always say,