Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #229 Can We Leave The Kids At Home?

Transcript

#229 Can We Leave The Kids At Home? · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I was on my way back from the airport yesterday
• 0:01
  Speaker 1: and there is a little road, not a little road,
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: it's like the main road in and out of the
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Northern Beach.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: It is called the Wakers Parkway. Okay.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: And everyone I'm driving along mine of their own business.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: As we're doing and I look over and there's a
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: it's one of those roads where you're not allowed to
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: walk up, like a highway. You're not meant to be
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: walking or riding your bike up there. There's a kid
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: on an electric scooter coming the other way and I
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: was like, there's a cop come in front of us.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: Nothing happened, and we're like, that's that's the legal surely
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: did you have a helmet on?
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, Thank heavens.
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: And a few hours has gone by and then April
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: sends me a message. One of the local mums groups
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: has reported on it. Ah, I feel like I.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: Was in on the news.
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: Hold that thought. Welcome back to dude doting dads.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: I am Mattie J And I'm Ash Sorry up.
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: And this is a podcast all about parenting. It is
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: the good, it is the bad and the late. And
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: we don't give advice, but Ash give it to me
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: straight so the.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: Ma says, Hi, moms.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: I saw this boy aged maybe fourteen, riding an e
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: scooter along Waycoast Parkway today midday Sunday. I was there
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: and I was so worried for him. Cars were moving
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: to give him a wide berth. But it really is
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: an accident waiting to happen, especially on the narrow bends.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: And just a picture of this kid.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Is his good kid?
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: What's on the back of his shirt?
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: I don't know, but he's just like he's just like
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: on his daily commute his scooter.
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: That's a narrow strip.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: You're not meant to be Yeah, no way. April was like,
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: how did he get on here from the start? And
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: it's what nine k's or something something, But it's like
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: so many people have.
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: Died on that road.
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: Mate, I saw a kid go pass on a scooter
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: just like that past me as I was waiting for
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: my coffee and he discarded a vape and I was
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: like God. And then he stopp because I was waiting
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: for his mate, and I was like, what do I
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: do here? Do I do I say something? I didn't?
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: I got too scared.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: I know, I freaked out.
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: I freaked out. I've heard stories like some of the moms.
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: Our neighbor once told off some kids on e bikes
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: and they threw a helmet at her.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: Now I told you about the guy I had a
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: crack at who So okay, I had Macy in the
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: car and I'm driving towards the shops right and on
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: the way to the shop is a roundabout. I was
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: turning right into the shop and there was an e
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: bike with him and his mate, no shirts on middle
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: of summer, coming up on the road. Don't have a problem,
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: don't care about that whatever. But I thought to myself,
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: I know the road rules. He clearly doesn't because he's
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: not slowing down at all.
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: So I hear an experience.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: Good drive, thank you very much.
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: And you also do sim racing Formula one.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: I could do the main roads around here at three
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: hundred k now, no problems. And then I was like,
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: I slow down, you know raced sims. I'll slow down
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: a little bit here so that I don't one. I don't.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to spook him right, and he slammed
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: the brakes on, looked at me and I put the
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: window down and I said, would you say? I said,
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: I put a full Dad point next time, I'll fucking
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: run you over.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: Can't. Oh yeah, full I had my daughter in the car.
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: Everyone's like, what's happening? But I was fool like, I
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: will fucking run you and.
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: But sometimes you got to come at them with aggression.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: He was petrified, good, and I was like, anyway, how
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: can't I say it took off?
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: You give me minute, I take a mile pick?
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly right. I think.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: Look, if I didn't, if it was someone else, someone
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: a little bit less experienced than me on the road,
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: who can't do three hundred ks an hour on a simulator,
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: it could have caused an accident, could be too dead
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: teens and a poor innocent person who's going to have
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: to suffer that for the rest of it. I've given
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: him a stern warning that if I see him again
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: being a dick, I will fucking run you over.
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: And I mean it, but please don't. Didn't the guy
• 3:51
  Speaker 3: in the All the Beaches run a child over on
• 3:53
  Speaker 3: an e bite? Sorry, housekeeping, And this is the story
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: that I'm going to score. He's in there. VIC asked
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: to hear what the story is before we recorded, and
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: I was like, ah, nope, no, no, no, I'll tell
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: you don't know. You don't know it, and I'm in
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: the dark. It's two topics that VIC hates. Oh okay,
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: it involves a toilet and an erection.
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: I thought you loved those topics.
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: I actually said him out, is it about pooh or come?
• 4:23
  Speaker 3: And I was like no, Wow, you're in for a treat. Okay.
• 4:28
  Speaker 3: So you may not know this. Maybe the listeners don't
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: know this, but it's very natural for a man to
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: wake up with an erection. Shock al right. It actually
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: means you're healthy. So it's a good sign.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: It is a healthy sign of what test I was.
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah, apparently I don't know. Everything's just working in order,
• 4:44
  Speaker 3: and it is. I wake up by the dual WI
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: as like the first point of call. So I had
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: an erection. I walk over to the bathroom and Vic,
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: I don't know if you can appreciate how tricky it
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: is for a man, very hard to do a WII.
• 4:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that was what going to my first question.
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: Actually, thank you, so you please ask away.
• 5:03
  Speaker 4: So how does one we then they have an erection.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: That's a very good question.
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: Well, you could you could stand like over and you
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: like lean and you like pull pull, down the erection,
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: so like.
• 5:13
  Speaker 2: Anglish, restrict the stream though it.
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: Does restrict, yeah, closes the clogs, closes the pipes.
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: Sorry, very well said.
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: But I'm also a bit sleepy in the morning, so
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: I like to sit down really yeah, yes, man, after
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: my heart, So what did you tuck it under the
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: toilet seat? So so I tuck it down. This morning's
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: erection was quite large.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: Oh god, Jacob Audio, if.
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: I can say that, it was mussive, and so tuck
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: it down. I start wing and I'm kind of like,
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: you know, sitting there. I'm very tired. I'm just working up.
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: And then I kind of look and I'm like, oh,
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: that's weird. And then this like like a burst pipe,
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: like this stream is coming out out from under my legs.
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: And there's a little gap between the toilet seat, the
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: fixed tourlet seat, the toilet lid that what you sit on.
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: There's a little gap there.
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because there's the soft clothes bits, but that leaves
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: the gap.
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: So my erection has ended up slipping into that gap
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: and was peeing out, oh, like a hydrant, like a hydrant.
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know, if she's with us, she will have
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: to show you a diagram. Later, Matt get an erection.
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: Let's go to the bathroom.
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: So anyway, so it's taken me like ten seconds to
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: notice there's a lot of piss on the floor.
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: Kids.
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: I'm wearing my grade track pants and so track pants
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: are covered and piss his pistol on the floor, and
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: I'm like, ah, this is a bit awkward. Marley walks
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: in and she's like, how's this? What piss everywhere? And
• 6:55
  Speaker 3: she's like, did you have an accident? And I was like, yeah,
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: an accent, it's ok get used to a kid, and
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: she's like, that's fine, it happens.
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: It does have a really strong PSI as well, was it.
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: No, not as strong as yours. It was like a
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: average stream.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: And sends me back what I do when I pee,
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: when I have an direction, it's different. Okay, I might
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: have to stand up for this, Okay, sorry, okay, sorry,
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: because I have to force it down and it is
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: quite uncomfortable. This is very uncomfortable.
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: What I do is I.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: Still stand up straight, but I just take steps back
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: like this and Harbor Bridget.
• 7:35
  Speaker 3: Harbor Bridget is high risk. That's arrogance the highest regard,
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: thank you, And I would have got way less pissed
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: on the fall than you, because I've been doing that
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: my whole life.
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: So I'm a pretty much from the toilet.
• 7:46
  Speaker 3: For what the fuck.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: Looks impressed.
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: I used to live in this house that the shower
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: was on the opposite end of the toilet, so I
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: would get in the shower in the morning and I
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: would pee in the toilet from the shower.
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: Wow, the perfect man does exist. Thank here he is.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: I can just all the women listening in their cars
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: right now, like, oh my goodness, they do exist, these
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: perfect men.
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: And this is your husband's bit of inspiration of how
• 8:13
  Speaker 3: they should behaving in the bathroom.
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: The.
• 8:18
  Speaker 3: Sorry victim, It was actually okay, okay, all.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: Right, I got a worse one and then I came everywhere,
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: and then I pooped and came at the same time.
• 8:28
  Speaker 4: How about you give us a studio update instead?
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, can we get a bidet in the studio?
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: I missed the Really, I've just worked out my shower.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: You can turn the nozzle so it's like a jet.
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: It's still white.
• 8:41
  Speaker 3: Thought, don't hate me, don't hate me. We did talk
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: about some paint colors yesterday, and I said, should we
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: paint some swatches, and you're like, just fucking commit, just
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: get the paint for leaders.
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: It's a sort of God, I didn't commit. Why not?
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: I wanted to just paint a little swatch on the
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: wall to see what it looks like.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: So you're going to do that while I'm doing the
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: real work.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: No, okay, I thought we could paint the undercoat. I'm
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: going to paint a swatch. There's a Bunnings nine minutes
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: down the road, eight minutes even so then we can
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: make a call on it. Because there's a couple of
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: different greens that we're not quite sure about. We can.
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: Don't hate me.
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: It's gonna be the first one you paint and then.
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: But we're all gonna be happy.
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: There's no arg I'm never not happy.
• 9:22
  Speaker 3: I know.
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: I think it's a good idea.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: Okay, all right, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: But if you hate it, like, that's okay, it's fine.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: I think whatever the first one is, I'm gonna love it. Okay,
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: I'll be quick.
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: I'll be so quick you won't even know. But we
• 9:37
  Speaker 3: are painting after this record.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: I am excited about hanging things. It's nothing like hanging something.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: I pay such a good feeling just I'm just going
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: to hang everything we can.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: I've hung everything I own at home. It's fucking amazing.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: Pitch me the feeling you get of successfully hanging a
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: picture on the wall.
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: There's nothing else like it.
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: All I've got is just pissing with a boner.
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: That's all you got. Wait do wait till you hang
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: something with a bonus.
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: Sorry, Vick.
• 10:03
  Speaker 4: Is it because you're using a drill? Does that make
• 10:05
  Speaker 4: you feel very manly?
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: It's like holding a just one of the things. I
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: guess you knocked on the door the other day. Who
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: Ronda's nephew?
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: What? And just feel people you know who the fuck
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: around it? Well, Rhonda was.
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: Roonda was my neighbor. General, the general who sadly passed away.
• 10:25
  Speaker 3: I want to say, like seven weeks ago, what.
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: Do we reckon she's the one who pooped herself to death.
• 10:30
  Speaker 3: Yes, she she was found dead on the toil she
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: passed out. I mean past that she died. It was
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: a big one toilet. But he's just such sensitivity and
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: bringing up.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: It's been seven weeks so that she's passed.
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, rest in peace. Knock on the door and this
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: person goes to Laura, Hey, where's Roonda, and Laura goes,
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: I'm so sorry. Yeah, yeah, she's she's not here, and
• 10:58
  Speaker 3: he goes, what she died on the toilet. Yeah, she
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: didn't say that.
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's way more sensitive than you and I.
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: And then he goes, oh, I'm her nephew, and Laura
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: was like.
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: Oh, yep, she proved herself to death.
• 11:18
  Speaker 3: And then but the weird thing is they're trying to
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: hunt down a family member to give the house to
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: right and.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: Changed you last night, didn't you? You're like, I'm Ronda's son.
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: But he goes, my, poor, my, poor Ronda. Oh my god,
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: I've been worried, sick. She didn't return my phone calls
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: and I've you know, I've been so worried. And it's
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: like she's like someone who you're quite close to and
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: she's not answering your phone calls. And she's in her
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: eighties and she lives by herself, and you live ten
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: minutes down the fucking road.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: Where have you been? Where have you?
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: Because he goes when did she dies? Like recently? And
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: Laura's like fucking seven weeks, almost two months ago, and
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: he was like, oh, what a shame.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I've got at I've got a reminder on my
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: phone schedule every two months to call it.
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: I was like, seems fishy.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it definitely is DNA testing.
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: Anyway, next thing, is there like just cleaning out the stuff?
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: He's moved in?
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: What's he like?
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: I didn't see him. I didn't see him. Who knows?
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: Updated?
• 12:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: Is he going to take the bins out? Lighting your
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: load of it? Although?
• 12:21
  Speaker 4: Is he going to move in?
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Is he going to move in?
• 12:23
  Speaker 3: He's already got a house and could you down the
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: road but he's sitting on that house?
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: Is I told you to change the locks ages ago?
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: Well, A freaked down.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: You would be halfway owning it by now.
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: I almost cleaned out the fridge. But anyway, we.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: Recently sold a bunch of toys for the Humpty Dumpty Foundation,
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: and someone has written in about one of said toys.
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: Can I just say huge things all the doughters who
• 12:48
  Speaker 3: purchased those soft toys.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: Yes, appreciate all of your contributions.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: I think I think they did sell more muddy Ja
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: toys than ash toys. I think. And when I say
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: I think, I know.
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: What about that for a brag?
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: Well we might know the reason why. If you read
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: this miss.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: I'm going to read this message out. My partner and
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: I fostering a puppy and her new favorite chew toy
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: is none other than Maddie j. Her favorite area is
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: to buy another groin. That's my favorite area too, the face. Sorry, Maddie,
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: we love the podcast, and Ash, we love you too,
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: but didn't get an Ash doll as we found the
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: mustache disconcerting.
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: You're much more handsome in person. Thank you.
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: It was quite a stringy little you know. Obviously to
• 13:35
  Speaker 3: the factory in China. I gave strict instructions on the
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: thick mustache and they took that information incorrectly and they
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: gave you a bit of a like like a seventeen
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: year old kid.
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: Yea, even though we don't have kids.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: You two great, keep it up and Ash, keep up
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: your sobriety too, amazing work and truly admirable of all.
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: That's what that means is that should I be offended
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: that I'm being mauled by a dog, that's fine.
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: It's about time and made Jay got a bit of action.
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, wow, must be nice.
• 14:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, bit Teethy, that's okay.
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: I just quickly we talked about my kids having a
• 14:08
  Speaker 3: full blown meltdown doing gymnastics, and after each class they
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: have the spin the wheel from a major prize can
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: confirm no major prize has been one. The meltdowns are
• 14:18
  Speaker 3: getting smaller, They're not non existent, They're still there, and
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: the gymnastics center has ignored my request to remove the
• 14:26
  Speaker 3: wheel from the reception area.
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: And they kids have a severe gambling so.
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: We got the pokes afterwards instead try and win it
• 14:33
  Speaker 3: all back. Hey we talked about pathetic injuries?
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, recently, So I do want to say sorry
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: to everyone who had to listen to that story.
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: But it's funny.
• 14:41
  Speaker 3: Was that the one where you came in the bathtub
• 14:43
  Speaker 3: and slipped over? Yep, people love that story, big trust No,
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: look at look at Biggs fapri it.
• 14:49
  Speaker 4: I actually thought it was the one where you've got
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: a soccer injury.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: At that was pathetic as well.
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: I just wanted to bring up come.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: Come on mind, Yeah, come on the mind.
• 15:03
  Speaker 3: Have you recovered from the back injury? Yeah fine, I'm fine.
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I just rolled my ankle on the weekend playing basketball.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: But I'm all good. Back's all good. Grinds a bit
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: sore from other things.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: Well that's this might make you feel a little bit
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: better about doubt it your what do you got bad back?
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: What don't I have?
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: Okay?
• 15:19
  Speaker 4: So well.
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: Rebecca has written in shout out to Rebecca, and she's
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: been very brave in sharing her story that she broke
• 15:25
  Speaker 3: two rigs from coughing from a cough.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: What an aggressive cough?
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: I mean, how like did she cough while falling down
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: the stairs?
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: I suppose? Like how much how much air are you
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: in taking?
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: You've got to have great lungs if.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: What is vision? Oh that is pathetic. So well done, Matt,
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: speaking of news and things that are broken.
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: Speaking of pathetic, I was I'm sorry. I didn't mean that, Vic,
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: that was I was avoiding it.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: Speaking of injuries, he's.
• 16:01
  Speaker 3: Big sorry, Vic, that wasn't the intro that you deserve.
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: Here is the magnificent, incredible, very intelligent and witty Vicky's vay. Yeah,
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: oh my gosh.
• 16:15
  Speaker 5: Anyway, new research shows the hundreds of constant interruptions mums
• 16:19
  Speaker 5: are faced with every day is actually doing us more
• 16:22
  Speaker 5: harm than good. Experts say being interrupted every three minutes
• 16:26
  Speaker 5: by the constant requests from children keeps mums stuck in
• 16:29
  Speaker 5: a prolonged state of stress, as a result, mum's brains
• 16:33
  Speaker 5: get stuck in high alert mode, keeping cortisol levels high
• 16:36
  Speaker 5: and leading mums to burnout, exhaustion, poor sleep, mood swings,
• 16:40
  Speaker 5: and difficulty focusing.
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I see that. I mean we were warned. Family
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: guy warned us years ago. Remember there's that scenes like mum, mum, mum, yes, yes, hi,
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: and it just runs off like that is so real.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: It's never like dad, or if it is, I can't
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: hear it.
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: It's like, just give give me over here.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: I know. And I'm always like, can you wait? I
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: want attention.
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: First, relentless. And I think someone wrote in one of
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: our videos they were like, kids don't do it intentionally.
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: They don't intentionally annoy us something more difficult. I was like, Oscar,
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: does I think they kind of do know what they're doing.
• 17:22
  Speaker 3: Sometimes I think I think kids are like, do you
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: know what today? I'm just going to fucking make life hard.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: For them Dad.
• 17:29
  Speaker 3: I think they know it, they know. They just want
• 17:31
  Speaker 3: to get a reaction. Like sometimes I like to push
• 17:34
  Speaker 3: Laura's buttons.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: It's one of lasts simple pleasures. Thank you to annoy
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: your wife.
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: Thank you, and she annoys me. I caught many a
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: finger in the asshole.
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: We don't want to know what you do in your
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: private life, well do we?
• 17:49
  Speaker 3: But I think kids sometimes they're just like sometimes they're amazing,
• 17:54
  Speaker 3: and sometimes they just they have those moments where they're
• 17:56
  Speaker 3: just like they know what they're doing. Oh yeah, And
• 17:59
  Speaker 3: they see us burnt out, stressed out, on like the
• 18:03
  Speaker 3: edge of having a breakdown, and they're just like, I'm
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: just gonna keep going.
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: I was gonna poked a bit one more time. Yet
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: what happens? And they wonder why I turn around to yell, yeah,
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: do you reckon?
• 18:11
  Speaker 5: It's because they just want to be like, always in your.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: Orbit, always always in the orbit, get out of my orbit.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: Basically don't know the difference between good attention and bad attention,
• 18:22
  Speaker 3: and even sometimes the bad attention that's.
• 18:23
  Speaker 5: Actually right, yeah, because then that's the one you actually
• 18:26
  Speaker 5: act on, like I find with my kids. Lily's definitely
• 18:30
  Speaker 5: more vocal and loud like she as I've mentioned on
• 18:34
  Speaker 5: the pod before, like she cries a lot, and I
• 18:36
  Speaker 5: think it's because she has worked out like it's Survival
• 18:39
  Speaker 5: of the Finest and she will yeh, scream and cry
• 18:42
  Speaker 5: at the job of a hat because she knows it'll
• 18:44
  Speaker 5: get me attention, and it'll get me to stop the
• 18:46
  Speaker 5: thing about every three minutes. It does feel like every
• 18:49
  Speaker 5: three minutes relentless. And they did the math on it
• 18:52
  Speaker 5: and it's like over four hundred times a day you're
• 18:55
  Speaker 5: getting interrupted and no wonder, like our brains are feeling
• 18:58
  Speaker 5: like they're about to explode because like we've got this
• 19:01
  Speaker 5: like you just start doing something and then you get distracted.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: Imagine if you had three of them.
• 19:05
  Speaker 3: But also, do you know what I really need to
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: get better at. I love her so much and she
• 19:12
  Speaker 3: does so much for the family. Nana Nana because because
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: you know, because she's there's no there's always something like
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: she's tried to order something off Uber Eats and she'll
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: be in the other room and she goes, Matt, I
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: don't know how it's happened, but I've just cultural zero
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: and I'm like, fuck, what have you done? And I'm
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: like give me your phone and I'm like right at
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: the edge of just like having a moment.
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: She's getting your back from all when you do when
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: you're a kid.
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: I know, I know she probably goes the other and
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: goes it's like.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: She'll get this guy. She how can I annoy mate, Matt.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: I'm like, that's easy. Here's the list of things to do.
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: She's still messaging it.
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: I sent her a Happy Mother's Day on Mother's Day?
• 19:59
  Speaker 4: Did you actually?
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: I was waiting for me to get it. Would you
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: say happy Mother's Day? I love you more than your son? Wow?
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: I just said happy Mother's Day. It's like, thank you.
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: I was the first one.
• 20:10
  Speaker 3: Remember, like she tell me that, Hey, why wouldn't she
• 20:13
  Speaker 3: tell me that she's.
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: Keeping it from you?
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: Remember when I called her on Mother's Day before you.
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: I think it was two years ago, and she was like,
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: look as she's calling me. Remember it was a video
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: call and I called her maybe it was a birthday
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: or something, and I was like, I'm going to get mad.
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: How far will you take this gag? If? I wait?
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: We're getting married?
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, gotcha, gotchack.
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: You can call me dad Vic.
• 20:36
  Speaker 3: Thank you for the breaking news anytime.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: Thank you, Vick.
• 20:39
  Speaker 5: Hey.
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: I went away with April over the weekend, no kids.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: She was lovely. But we're going out one night. This
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: very quick story.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: We're going out one night to an event that I
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: was invited to together, which was nice. And I were
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: in the hotel room getting ready and I was minding
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: my business watching football, and I look over and April's
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: doing push ups before she's getting a party pump.
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: I was like, what are you doing? She was like nothing?
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: How many can she do?
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: Bro? I want to tell you. I'll show you getting
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: into pompe Damn, holy shit.
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: I don't know if I should be watching about to go?
• 21:27
  Speaker 3: Do you know what? I think? Credit where credit is due.
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: It is amazing.
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: She wore a jacket the whole time.
• 21:34
  Speaker 3: What a waste were you in court being like take
• 21:38
  Speaker 3: the jacket, take it off, Aprils?
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: What there's a lot of arms out because it was basketball,
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: was like, get your arms out.
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: Good on her as a mom of two kids. She
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: is in phenomenal shape. And I mean that in a
• 21:49
  Speaker 3: respectful manner.
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: I appreciate that.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: It's it reminded me of like Jordy Shaw, you know,
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: like Jim ten laundry, Yes, Jim.
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: Turn laundry beers anyway, just like I just fit in
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: on that.
• 22:05
  Speaker 3: Wow. Can I ask you a serious question when you
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: look over and you see your wife, your soulmate, the
• 22:13
  Speaker 3: mother of your children, just pushing out those push ups
• 22:16
  Speaker 3: like they're nothing.
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: The answer is yes, nice, nice, all right, alright, that's
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: a question you don't need to know.
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: Are you turned on?
• 22:27
  Speaker 5: Oh?
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, I'm like can you carry me?
• 22:31
  Speaker 3: There?
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: You carry me? Carry me?
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: Will you? Will you in any way? Feel is the
• 22:35
  Speaker 3: word emasculated?
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah? No, carry me?
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: Okay? If she ends up becoming stronger than you, like
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: if you go.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: This morning, she's she does love a humble brag my wife,
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: hence the push ups she walks in this morning.
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: She was like doing IDLs? What are that?
• 22:52
  Speaker 3: Romantic deadlifts?
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: Romantic deadlifts? Thank you set that up?
• 23:02
  Speaker 3: You motherfucker? Who got me?
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: I'm really good Anyway.
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: She's like, I can ideal more than all the boys
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: at a gym. I was like, wow, that is fucking crazy.
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: So she's already stronger than me, Like, no fucking doubt.
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: Wow, she's got like the hip thrust from hip thrust in.
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: I love it good.
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: How was that? How was the rest of the trip
• 23:25
  Speaker 3: just the two of you in a hotel room?
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: It was good? Actually, you know, like especially sober. We
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: walked the botanical gardens, We went to a museum.
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: What you hanging? I say, what are you no offense
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: doing in a museum?
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: Just being a past mainly did you like what were
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: you looking at?
• 23:44
  Speaker 3: Any artifacts? Take your fancy.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: There was a bunch of chairs in the museum and
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: they had two jokes that didn't go over very well.
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: The first one was when we got to the first chair,
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: I said, this is the first original boyfriend chair, the
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: chair that's at the front of the changing room.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: This is the first one.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: And they model all the rest of them to people
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: or to April, just to whoever will listen.
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: That's the sort of guy I am.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: And then there was a group of chairs and I said,
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: this is the Museum of cup chairs.
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: Very good.
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: Also not very good.
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: It's good material. I feel like cupchairs are very niche.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: Yes, everyone was a little bit.
• 24:17
  Speaker 3: Anyone who doesn't know what a cut chair is.
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: The Japanese tourists were very confused.
• 24:21
  Speaker 5: You know what a cup chair is, vic not specifically.
• 24:23
  Speaker 5: I know it is some sort of sexual chair.
• 24:25
  Speaker 3: Oh this is your mind.
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: This is a family friendly show.
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: Out of the gutter, Victoria.
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: It's a jerk off chair ocase it's different.
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: It's where if you're into watching your partner have sex
• 24:36
  Speaker 3: with another person, you then watch via a cup chair
• 24:40
  Speaker 3: in the room.
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: Sexual.
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: It is very sexual.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: Anyway, did museum, played a bit of basketball, had a
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: couple of sleeping, couple.
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: Of midday nap So good.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: It was good to get away with just April and
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: no kids and not spend the whole time hungover.
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: It good.
• 24:55
  Speaker 5: Now that you're not drinking, how does that affect April?
• 24:58
  Speaker 5: Does she still have some drinks?
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: I think the sobriety is my thing, so I don't
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: like to push it on anyone unless they ask me
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: about it. And April is not a very big drinker anyway,
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: but she'll have a couple, which she did over the
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: course of the weekend.
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: But yeah, I I don't have any.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: And like when I went to Japan with Matt Veach,
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: he was like, oh, I will just stay away from.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: I was like, no, no, no, no no, because I don't
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: want to. I learned early on.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: Andy Cook said to me he was like when he
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: went sober, his brother pulled him aside and said, hey,
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: this is I'm so proud of you, but don't make
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: it everyone else's problem, And which is so true, because
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: I'm happy to help people out, but I'm not going
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: to sit there and preach about don't drink. You can
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: have fifty beers in front of me, I'm not going
• 25:40
  Speaker 1: to at the moment like.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: Pathetic loser and I'm like, you're gonna die. No, But
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: I think she's.
• 25:47
  Speaker 3: Too busy to push ups.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I just put a drink under with the storage
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: like she's I think she would much prefer me not
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: to drink. So I don't have any rules around it.
• 25:59
  Speaker 3: Matto for me will not surprise you ash, but maybe
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: surprise the listeners. Sadly, Buster is very old, I know,
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: very old.
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: He's keeping the family together, he is, and we love Busting.
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: He's the glue he is.
• 26:15
  Speaker 3: He is the super glue of the family. It's such
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: a patient dog. He's put up with all three kids
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: and they poke and they pride, and he's also sometimes
• 26:25
  Speaker 3: it's annoying when Pobby's having a sleep, but anyone who
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: like touches the front door handle, he's like, and you're like,
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: fucking shout out because you wait the baby. But he
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: is such a great little guard dog.
• 26:36
  Speaker 6: Little wrong word. He's forty kilos, yeah, three legged, forty
• 26:39
  Speaker 6: kilo dog. He's not little, and he used to be
• 26:41
  Speaker 6: really great. Like you take him for a pool in
• 26:43
  Speaker 6: the morning and if for whatever reason he missed that
• 26:47
  Speaker 6: walk or he didn't do a pool in the morning.
• 26:48
  Speaker 6: If he needed to go in the afternoon, he'd be like, hey,
• 26:51
  Speaker 6: I need to go for a poo. He just come
• 26:53
  Speaker 6: up and very good. He just like tapping the leg
• 26:56
  Speaker 6: and he'd be like little like no, and you like
• 26:58
  Speaker 6: need to.
• 26:59
  Speaker 3: Go for a poop?
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: Great, you called it.
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: I know I would never restrict that level of enjoyment
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: for anyone, thank you. But recently, given that he's now
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: twelve years old, don't know that isn't dog years like ninety.
• 27:13
  Speaker 3: But he's having trouble controlling his bowel movement. Is it?
• 27:17
  Speaker 6: Really?
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: God? He's good. So the other morning, wake up, I
• 27:22
  Speaker 3: got Popping in my arms, and she's a little like
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: little Matt with some toys in the living room that's
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: next to buss bed.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: It's a little soft yet the ones, so.
• 27:32
  Speaker 3: I put Poppy there. She likes a couple of toys
• 27:34
  Speaker 3: she plays, but she loves it, loves to play with
• 27:36
  Speaker 3: the toys. So do that. I then start making breakfast
• 27:39
  Speaker 3: for Marley and Lola, and then Laura comes down the stairs.
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: I want to say like a minute later, and she goes,
• 27:46
  Speaker 3: oh my god, and I'm like, all right, I know,
• 27:50
  Speaker 3: I don't often make the kids breakfast, but.
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: I was like, why, I don't get they.
• 28:14
  Speaker 3: And I'm like, what.
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: This guy's making breakfast?
• 28:23
  Speaker 3: Buyer's low and I'm like, what's wrong? And she has Poppy,
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: runs over, grabs Poppy. She's got dog ship in her
• 28:34
  Speaker 3: hands like she's just picked it up. And as children do,
• 28:37
  Speaker 3: they're so inquisitive textures and no, thankfully, thank it had
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: just it. It just happened, like you know, that would
• 28:46
  Speaker 3: be straight to hospital. Gosh, could you imagine? And Buster
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: just the motion of getting up and taking a step,
• 28:57
  Speaker 3: nuggets coming out the back, and as he's because he
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: also he kind of knows, like he's a little bit embarrassed,
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: and as he's like, oh my god, what's happening, as
• 29:05
  Speaker 3: he like takes steps to run away and hide in
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: the corner.
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: He's leaving a trial. We can find you. There's a
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: trail ship.
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: Literally and poor guy, I'm like Buster, and he's so embarrassed,
• 29:16
  Speaker 3: he's ashamed of him, so he's shaking.
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: It's funny like dogs, when they're younger and they poop
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: in the house, there's a bit of a smugness about it,
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: but when they're older, it's.
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: Like it's an accident. It's like when Nana farts.
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: She's like, I'm just gonna say nothing because I'll be embarrassed.
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: And it slipped out. I had no control. Imagine having
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: no control of that, I know. And he's like so.
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: Full and Laura is like, don't get angry at him,
• 29:41
  Speaker 3: but I'm.
• 29:41
  Speaker 4: Like, fuck, god's dangerous.
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's dangerous. Poppy's there got pull in her hands.
• 29:46
  Speaker 3: And then there's like pulling the carpet. We can laugh
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: about it now, and we can laugh about it now.
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: There's always ship everywhere at your house.
• 29:52
  Speaker 3: Sorry, we put him down anyway, then he starts coming,
• 29:57
  Speaker 3: why not?
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: Why not? You've gone the master.
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: I'm just letting it all out. I can't help it.
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: I can't help it. I poop ship and coming all
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: the same time.
• 30:06
  Speaker 4: Are you gonna have to put him in a nappy?
• 30:08
  Speaker 4: A dog nappy?
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: Please put him in a navvy?
• 30:12
  Speaker 5: They do because I think, I like genuinely, if he's
• 30:14
  Speaker 5: getting old, like they can't keep it in anymore, so
• 30:16
  Speaker 5: you're gonna end up having who all over the house
• 30:18
  Speaker 5: all the time.
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: So it's like we're.
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: Finally out of the nappy stage and the dog statue. Yeah, yeah,
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: look big dog, big poos massive.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: It's the what do you know, like, so my dog
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: little dog, cat dog, little poos.
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: Right, that's's how science works.
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: Anyway, Squidgy squiggy Iggy the other day coming and goes,
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: what just logame squige really cat really squeegees squeege is
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: looking at and go.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: Anyway, obviously she has to go out in the morning.
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: April usually takes her out in the morning because it
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: was up at the gym and the crack and ask
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: crack an not even dawn, it's dark.
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: She's gone to the gym in the dark.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: You're going to bed And she's like, well for gym, Yeah,
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: I'm finishing racing. I've just done an endurance race on
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: my resimulator. And she's just like, I'm off to the
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: gym anyway.
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: So I took the dog out the other morning, really early,
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: the ars crack of dawn. I was just awake. So
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: I just went and I did it, and I went
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: to pick up the poop with the bag. Hold in
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: the bag.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: Ah fu, five point thirty in the morning. The last
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: thing you fucking want literally ruined my day. It's not
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: even daytime yet, my day's ruined. So I would hate
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: to have to pick up any big poos like that.
• 31:31
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: And then if you go into nappies with that.
• 31:34
  Speaker 3: Ah fuck.
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: I can just picture you're rolling him over and over
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: and like getting the wipe out. Ah, him getting a
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: big red rocket. Ah yeah, thank god he doesn't have balls,
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: he'd have shit all over him.
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: Matt, How smart do you think you are as a parent? Ooh,
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: I don't care. We have a new segment. Ah yeah,
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: got him, have a new segment. Okay.
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: It is thanks to Audi's shop Smarter with Audi, Good Different,
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: And we asked people to send in their parenting hacks
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: if you will or when have you been a smart parent?
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: You come up with something, you're going, God, damn, I'm genius. Genius.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: Okay, so we're gonna read some of the mount please
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: and thank you for everyone who wrote in. I'm gonna
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: start with Paige. At dinner, we say Fiona made this,
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: not mummy. Fiona is the chef's name at daycare because
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: they eat everything. Yeah.
• 32:27
  Speaker 3: So it took me a second. I was like, yeah,
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: because they eat everything at daycare.
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: I also have my book is about this that's coming
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: out this year, so we'll talk about that later on
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: little teaser.
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: Well done, Yeah, well done, marketing one.
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: I want nailed it. I am also named Paige and
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: I also wrote that.
• 32:43
  Speaker 3: What name is this? A great name?
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: That's how it's spelled. It is in capitals. What do
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: you want to say, Matte?
• 32:55
  Speaker 3: The name is spelled m A k A y l
• 32:58
  Speaker 3: a h mackay kaylaka.
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: Well that's a bit sorry, Mikayla.
• 33:07
  Speaker 3: If you have a unique name, please don't be scared
• 33:09
  Speaker 3: to send us in a message.
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, every wine we always get them. They're doing it
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: on it.
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: They're trolling us now because they know I can't pronounce it.
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: So I'm just gonna say something dumb, like Makayla.
• 33:18
  Speaker 3: Where are all the Sam's and Daves and Tims?
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: There's Sam Samy?
• 33:23
  Speaker 3: Come on? This was from Mikayla. Mikayla, We respect and
• 33:29
  Speaker 3: love all doughs, regardless of the name and spelling.
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: If you get that sort of treatment on your name,
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: that means we really love.
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: You, We love you, we love it. Consider it a
• 33:35
  Speaker 3: warm hug and embrace. I made spagheti bolonnaise for dinner
• 33:38
  Speaker 3: the other week, and I covered the dining table with
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: a plastic tablecloth. Well, dinner was served on said tablecloth,
• 33:46
  Speaker 3: and my kids ate so much food more than they
• 33:50
  Speaker 3: would from a plate. They are asking to do it
• 33:52
  Speaker 3: more often. Winning also means I'm winning in the kitchen
• 33:56
  Speaker 3: because of the clean up department. I've seen videos of
• 34:00
  Speaker 3: this behavior. I've always been a skeptic.
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I've looked.
• 34:05
  Speaker 3: At it, and I thought, surely that's just like you
• 34:08
  Speaker 3: want to have the mess contained duor plate?
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, where do we go to next? Right?
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: Because I feel like we're now we're out growing a plate.
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: We're gonna outgrow the table at some point. Just seven before,
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: we just got to fucking pull a spaghetti out in
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: the backyard of the kids.
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: Quick divans. How much you canna eat?
• 34:22
  Speaker 5: Right?
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: Someone's gonna dry.
• 34:23
  Speaker 4: On MICHAELA actually send in photos of this.
• 34:25
  Speaker 3: Oh my god. I asked for photos and I didn't
• 34:27
  Speaker 3: think she'd send them.
• 34:29
  Speaker 5: So basically, basically at the end, you like pack up
• 34:33
  Speaker 5: the tablecloth like a bag and then just chuck it.
• 34:36
  Speaker 4: All in the bin.
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: Can I ask, if you want to keep your leftovers,
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: you put it in the fridge like that?
• 34:42
  Speaker 3: Why in this fridge? Because you know, in Indian culture
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: they eat with their hands, they don't have cutlery. Is
• 34:50
  Speaker 3: that how is? I want to see this photo because
• 34:52
  Speaker 3: I'm not sure if the kids are eating with their
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: hands or with cutlery.
• 34:54
  Speaker 4: Like you know that one of them has a fork.
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: I love there's one kid in there just giving just
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: given the classic.
• 35:01
  Speaker 3: Boo oh my gosh.
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: I'm concerned for that one kid giving bang signals straight after.
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: He's only young and bitter.
• 35:09
  Speaker 3: Who is it game in the corner as well. I
• 35:10
  Speaker 3: love that from Kmart.
• 35:12
  Speaker 5: I love that you guys always look at the like
• 35:14
  Speaker 5: periphery things photo.
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: I want to know what they're watching on the couch
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: is what's that show? It's Baby Shark?
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: I love the baby pictures Macaa, Eli j and Harry.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: You guys are like you have an amazing mum and
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: you're a lucky bunch of kids.
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: Well done, Mikayla.
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: I gotta make gotta make on the name. This one's
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: from Sammy.
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: Sometimes when my kids are beyond tired, I'll put one
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: of their favorite shows on, but in a different language,
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: love and tell them that their brains are so tired
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: that it can't understand English anymore and they need to
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: sleep to charge the brain battery.
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: Again.
• 35:48
  Speaker 3: That is elite.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: I had to stop Macy from watching the Chinese version
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: of or the Mandarin version of Bluey It's get to
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: be racist, and I was.
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: Like, stop it, what do you mean, sna know?
• 35:58
  Speaker 3: I felt like, I don't know, she's learning mandarinnyhow Yeah.
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: I was like she was laughing at it, and I
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: was like, oh, I just didn't feel right.
• 36:06
  Speaker 3: You're like, that's you're taking away her learning a second language.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: I don't wanted to think another language sounds funny because
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: its someone's native tongue.
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: I think that's very mature.
• 36:14
  Speaker 3: Being considerate. What that's something.
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: Then we had honey chicken for dinner. It is lovely.
• 36:21
  Speaker 3: This one is from Leah held it in. People are
• 36:30
  Speaker 3: going to miss every submission from now one is going
• 36:33
  Speaker 3: to be anonymous. So Leah says, bath crayons and four
• 36:37
  Speaker 3: walls tiled floor to ceiling. They feel like they're being
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: naughty drawing all over the walls, but it just washes. Oh.
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: When I need an hour to get shit done, I
• 36:48
  Speaker 3: pull out the bath crayons and they go to town
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: in the bathroom.
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: And is fucking genius. That is jeane ys Wow.
• 36:56
  Speaker 5: I have a question about that though, because what if
• 36:58
  Speaker 5: they get crayon on the grout.
• 37:00
  Speaker 3: There we go. Yeah, that's a very valid question, Vic,
• 37:02
  Speaker 3: and I'm glad you asked that that is a concern
• 37:04
  Speaker 3: because cleaning grout sucks. Yeah.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: Look, if it's a new bathroom, you wouldn't know.
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: But if it was like look brown anyway, if you've
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: been harped onto your husband about getting the grout cleaned,
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: it's another good excuse to be like, they keeps them
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: run all over it. True, I think like, but like
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: the grout in bathrooms designed is not moistury in anyway,
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: so you could probably get it out.
• 37:23
  Speaker 3: I've never heard of a bath crayon.
• 37:26
  Speaker 5: Yeah, they're great because then the kids feel like they're
• 37:28
  Speaker 5: doing something naughty because they're drawing in the bath and
• 37:31
  Speaker 5: it just washes off.
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: Wow, you don't want them to branch out though into that.
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: Well that's it, that's it, you know?
• 37:36
  Speaker 5: Do they Our kids have been drawing with actual grayonds
• 37:39
  Speaker 5: all over our furniture.
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: Oh, the permanent markets seem to have found their way
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: into the kids'.
• 37:42
  Speaker 3: Textas literally in the pencil case. I look over and
• 37:45
  Speaker 3: the kids got sharpies, and I'm like, how the fun
• 37:48
  Speaker 3: did you get there? The pencilcan We've got a rogue
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: sharpie fucking assassin coming in and like planting them.
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Macy drew something yesterday, like to give it to me.
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh, that's amazing, but I couldn't get
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: past the it was permanent mark And I was like.
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: But and she was like but what. I was like,
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: it's beautiful, but permanent marker.
• 38:07
  Speaker 3: I have something?
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: Do you have one? Matt?
• 38:10
  Speaker 3: I have something.
• 38:11
  Speaker 2: You are a parent.
• 38:12
  Speaker 3: And when I discovered this product, I was like, Oh
• 38:16
  Speaker 3: my gosh, wait until the parents of this country, if
• 38:19
  Speaker 3: not world, hear about this news. I thought it was groundbreaking.
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: Before you say it, what are the chances that everyone
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: else is already using this?
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: Okay, all right, go.
• 38:30
  Speaker 3: On, I've already spoken about this on socials and everybody
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: was like, how fucking dumb are you related? All I
• 38:39
  Speaker 3: was like, guys, is the thing called dummies?
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: Wow?
• 38:42
  Speaker 3: I don't shre what it is?
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: What do you got?
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: So a little while ago, Poppy is teething and as
• 38:48
  Speaker 3: they teeth, that increased level of saliva actually stuffs up
• 38:53
  Speaker 3: there and in like Inteskee real real mucacy, and the
• 38:57
  Speaker 3: poo becomes like acidic, so Poppy, all of a sudden,
• 39:01
  Speaker 3: I woke up changing uppy and I was like, oh
• 39:02
  Speaker 3: my gosh, her poor bottom was red raw. And I
• 39:05
  Speaker 3: was using everything and then I was like, nothing was working.
• 39:08
  Speaker 3: So I went to the cupboard and I found a
• 39:09
  Speaker 3: product that I used and instantly, right same day, I
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: saw results. But Pan, what is this mystical product.
• 39:23
  Speaker 4: We have that I is the only thing that works
• 39:24
  Speaker 4: on Lily?
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: And I was like, great for X ME two.
• 39:28
  Speaker 4: And you've used that on tattoos, haven't you?
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: Yes, I remember, but it's too expensive.
• 39:33
  Speaker 3: I was like, I was like, people need to know
• 39:35
  Speaker 3: about this. And I was like everyone, hey, but panthering
• 39:38
  Speaker 3: is so and everyone's like, just we're going to just
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: stop you right there. You got three fucking kids. How
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: are you only now on your third child?
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: That's valid? Why how are you only because.
• 39:46
  Speaker 3: I don't know what? I don't know?
• 39:48
  Speaker 4: Ash, Yeah, every child's different.
• 39:50
  Speaker 5: Like we didn't use it on Louis and now we've
• 39:52
  Speaker 5: had to get it for Lily.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: That's true.
• 39:54
  Speaker 3: And I think if there's anyone out there who maybe
• 39:57
  Speaker 3: is yeah, also, can I just say as well, good
• 40:01
  Speaker 3: for lip it.
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: Is as well that you know that was on your baby.
• 40:06
  Speaker 4: Buttole, yeah, I put that it your finger.
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: But it's anti septic, isn't it.
• 40:12
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 40:14
  Speaker 5: Putting a baby bomb cream anywhere near my lips?
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: Is that what that smell is?
• 40:18
  Speaker 3: Can here?
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: It's made by Bayer. Fun fact, my dad used to
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: work for Bayer. Okay and Bayer have their own town
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: in Europe funded by Bayer Bay Munich, funded by a
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: pharmaceutical company. There you go, fun fact for everybody.
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: I could have made that up.
• 40:34
  Speaker 5: I don't know, probably cut it out, but it says nappy, rash,
• 40:39
  Speaker 5: mad lip dry.
• 40:41
  Speaker 3: People are like, here's maybe they're fucking with me.
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: Hope.
• 40:43
  Speaker 3: I've been putting on my lips all week.
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: It's as soft as a baby's bottom.
• 40:47
  Speaker 3: But thank you to Audi for that delicious segment, which
• 40:50
  Speaker 3: is just making everyone a little bit smarter.
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: Shop smarter when you shop at Audi Aldi good different.
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: Hey, Ash, you know we we spoke about the fact
• 40:59
  Speaker 3: that we go people are big like talking to you going,
• 41:01
  Speaker 3: Just so you know, Dot of Dilemmas are now being
• 41:04
  Speaker 3: taken out of a Wednesday episode because it's going to
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: be in the new Monday episode because and then we
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: did our first was that our first Monday episode, Vick.
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: It's the second one and then we ended up talking
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: about your sobriety again. No, I just that was a
• 41:18
  Speaker 3: great episode, by the way.
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: No dilemmas were talked about. Where we promised it, so
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: we're going to do it now.
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: We are going to squeeze in a don'ting gloma and
• 41:24
  Speaker 3: I just I mean it when it was a great chat.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: Thank you by the way, Thank you now you need
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: us more than ever, know that we still have each other.
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: You can send sure doting dilemma.
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: You can sure donting dilemma.
• 41:39
  Speaker 3: So this one was posting the Facebook group and I
• 41:41
  Speaker 3: thought it was a great topic to unpack on the podcast.
• 41:44
  Speaker 3: A lot of people Vick were saying.
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: A lot of people a.
• 41:47
  Speaker 3: Lot of people were like, you got to talk about it.
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: On the podcast and beautiful.
• 41:51
  Speaker 3: The question is my husband and I may have the
• 41:54
  Speaker 3: opportunity to go on a ten day trip to South
• 41:57
  Speaker 3: Africa in a couple of months, but it'll be cut free.
• 42:01
  Speaker 3: I've got an eleven month old and a three year
• 42:03
  Speaker 3: old and haven't been away from my youngest for more
• 42:06
  Speaker 3: than four hours and my eldest for more than one night. Honestly,
• 42:10
  Speaker 3: the only thing stopping me from going is the guilt
• 42:12
  Speaker 3: of leaving them home. How does everyone navigate this, ash
• 42:17
  Speaker 3: m I saw your answer to this question, but for
• 42:19
  Speaker 3: people who may not have seen it, what did you say?
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: I said, do it?
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: This is they had family that could babysit and have
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: put their voluntarily put their hands up.
• 42:27
  Speaker 2: You take that. You take that opportunity because it's not
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: going to come around all the time.
• 42:29
  Speaker 3: Do you think, though, on Vic as well, do you
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: think only having ever spent four hours away from your
• 42:37
  Speaker 3: child to then jump into the deep end of doing
• 42:40
  Speaker 3: ten eleven days away from your child? Just think about
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: the potential anxiety.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: You are asking the wrong guy, which I know exactly.
• 42:47
  Speaker 3: That's why I said, Vic, jump on this one pick.
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: I actually get have anxiety just thinking about it.
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: Actually, what the longest you've ever been away from your kids?
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: From Lily?
• 42:58
  Speaker 5: Because she did say her youngest, I've only spent one night,
• 43:01
  Speaker 5: sorry two nights when we moved, but they were with
• 43:03
  Speaker 5: mom and dad, but one night mostly since she was born,
• 43:07
  Speaker 5: and that even took a while, like she's now three,
• 43:11
  Speaker 5: when she was eleven months, I'd never spent any time
• 43:13
  Speaker 5: away from her, and to then leave her knowing that
• 43:17
  Speaker 5: she doesn't like to not have me around and for
• 43:21
  Speaker 5: ten days.
• 43:23
  Speaker 3: It's a lot. It's so hard.
• 43:25
  Speaker 5: But also I know how enriching those ten days would
• 43:27
  Speaker 5: be to the parents. And as everyone jen Noways says,
• 43:29
  Speaker 5: and every parenting expert says, you can't parent from an
• 43:33
  Speaker 5: empty cup.
• 43:33
  Speaker 4: It would fill your cup.
• 43:34
  Speaker 5: It would be good for your relationship and your kids
• 43:37
  Speaker 5: will forget it. But it's just that like initial like, but.
• 43:40
  Speaker 3: Don't you think a big factor here that we don't
• 43:43
  Speaker 3: know about is what are the grandparents like and how
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: much time do they spend with the kids. Because some
• 43:48
  Speaker 3: grandparents are amazing and they're so hands on and they
• 43:51
  Speaker 3: know the kids really well. They have a great relationship,
• 43:54
  Speaker 3: they know how to parent the kids, and so to
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: leave them alone with you completely removed in another country,
• 44:00
  Speaker 3: it could be easy for the grandparents, or you could
• 44:02
  Speaker 3: be fielding phone calls being like, oh they run out
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: of formula and where the hell aren happy?
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so easy for that generation. I could do it,
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: but it's like, no, you fucking can't. You can barely
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: raise me, like, you know, like my parents pre dad's
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: heart attack.
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: I would be like no, post dad's heart attack, because
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: I had to ended up in Sydney for so long
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: and spending so much time with them. Absolutely, yes, Like
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, because they've they have learnt their routine.
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: April literally gives them a folder like it's a bare BnB.
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: Like, my god, I want to see that.
• 44:33
  Speaker 2: I'll get it out.
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: I'll get it out next time. But it's next time
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: we go away, which is going to be often.
• 44:38
  Speaker 3: No, but like get in your trip that you just
• 44:41
  Speaker 3: look at Melbourne two days. Who are the kids?
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: No idea pop up? Who picks them up from school?
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: Like twice or three times?
• 44:50
  Speaker 3: Did you feel any level of anxiety at all?
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: No?
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: No, And like April when we went away last year
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: was the first time that we went away without the
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: kids together for more than one night.
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: Which bie Vegas, yeah, a couple of times last year.
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: I think it was good for us and the kids
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: because it ripped that band aid off early for everyone.
• 45:12
  Speaker 3: Because you think it would be like I just feel
• 45:15
  Speaker 3: like if you've never done a night away, I just
• 45:19
  Speaker 3: think it costs so much money to travel overseas, and
• 45:22
  Speaker 3: I also think it would suck so much to do that,
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: to spend that amount of money and get there and
• 45:26
  Speaker 3: be like I'm not enjoying this because I just can't
• 45:28
  Speaker 3: stop worrying.
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: Honestly, I'm for the testing the warrior, I understand, but
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: it's going to come down to circumstantials, right, It's going
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: to come down to.
• 45:39
  Speaker 2: If you're like, my parents have acrossed the road.
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: They're there all the time, and you're like, okay, Well,
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: other than the fact that if I can get over
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: the fact that this is the first time I'm away
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: from them, the time is not going to make a difference.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: I think you're going to FaceTime them every day anyway.
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: You're gonna get updates, You're gonna want to know, you want,
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: You're gonna be looking at for give you a really
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: good chance to maybe take a step back. Well who
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: am I I don't know.
• 46:03
  Speaker 2: But like taking step back and go okay, great, and you.
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: Mentioned something before it's so good for a relationship, Like
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: look at that movie This is forty That's what I
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: felt like on the weekend. Then we get home and
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: the kids just push the buttons. You're like, all of
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: a sudden, you find this reconnection of why you're with
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: that person and why you ended up and why you
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: ended up here having the kids that you have and
• 46:19
  Speaker 1: the kids that you love so much. And that you're
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: worried about escaping from But.
• 46:23
  Speaker 2: I think you're right.
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: Ten days might be a bit like whack bang, But
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: we don't know the circumstances.
• 46:28
  Speaker 3: But yeah, Also, if you have to like pull the
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: trigger and lock it in, just do like one night,
• 46:31
  Speaker 3: just do one night.
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: There must be a reason it's ten days, Okay, there
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: must be something that it's like, Okay, it's a ten
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: days something that they really want to do, and is
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: it a bucket list item?
• 46:39
  Speaker 2: And you've got the opportunity to do it, fucking do it.
• 46:42
  Speaker 4: It'll be a wedding or something like that.
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: Do it, grab hold of it and have the opportunity.
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: You can always come home.
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: I know it's a big expense, but like, at the
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: same time, I'm all for, like, don't if an opportunity
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: is there, and if you're thinking about it already, like okay,
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: well it is important enough to ask the question, then
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: it's obviously it's important to you to grab hold.
• 47:01
  Speaker 5: Of And she says, here, the only thing stopping me
• 47:04
  Speaker 5: from going is the guilt of leaving them a home.
• 47:06
  Speaker 5: One thing my therapist said a long time ago before,
• 47:09
  Speaker 5: when Louis was little and I was contemplating leaving Louis
• 47:12
  Speaker 5: with Mum and dad during the day because I feel
• 47:14
  Speaker 5: guilty about it going back to work. And she said,
• 47:17
  Speaker 5: one of the best things you can do for your
• 47:19
  Speaker 5: kids is to have them know that there's someone else
• 47:22
  Speaker 5: in the world that can take care of them, because
• 47:24
  Speaker 5: if they think that their parents are the only people
• 47:26
  Speaker 5: in the whole world that can take care of them,
• 47:28
  Speaker 5: kids get anxiety because if anything ever happens or if
• 47:31
  Speaker 5: you go away, their whole world shatters and they're like,
• 47:33
  Speaker 5: who the fuck's going to take care of me? So
• 47:35
  Speaker 5: this is actually helping your kids grow a bit of resilience,
• 47:38
  Speaker 5: even though she's only eleven months. It's actually, yeah, that
• 47:41
  Speaker 5: is a good thing.
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because it's like, even for my kids, it's like,
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: whenever they've got a problem, who do they ask mum? Right,
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: And I've said to Oscar, I'm like, you know, like
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: you can ask nanny the same questions, you know, because
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: I would have asked my mom the same questions, and
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: now she's your nan.
• 47:55
  Speaker 2: So why not?
• 47:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: And I think pre my dad's heart attack, which was
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: a blessing in disguise, really not for him, Paul, but
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: he's I'm sure, And I think honestly for him, he
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: would deep down think the relationship he's built with Oscar
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: heart attack post heeart attack because he was trapped here,
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: couldn't fly or anything. I think he's so happy that
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: that happened because he got to spend that till he
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: would only come down.
• 48:21
  Speaker 2: He hates Sydney.
• 48:22
  Speaker 3: We need more heart attacks, That's what I've always said,
• 48:25
  Speaker 3: more cholesterol.
• 48:26
  Speaker 5: My only counter argument it would be if there's grandparents
• 48:29
  Speaker 5: who are very bad at holding the boundaries that you
• 48:32
  Speaker 5: set for your children, and then you come back after
• 48:35
  Speaker 5: the ten days and like this the cigarette.
• 48:37
  Speaker 3: And you're like, well, Bobby got a cigarette because it
• 48:39
  Speaker 3: kept them quiet.
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: But you fixed him and then I'll take him back like.
• 48:43
  Speaker 4: High on sugar and like addicted to TV.
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: But I stand by the opportunity to think, if the
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: opportunity is there, and it's not going to be there again,
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: and you're going to regret not going, fucking buckle up
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: and go.
• 48:50
  Speaker 3: Obviously different circumstances because I had no access to any
• 48:53
  Speaker 3: communication at all, but I was in South Africa away
• 48:56
  Speaker 3: from my kids for a period of time, and I
• 48:58
  Speaker 3: think it was day three, and again, you know, I'm
• 49:03
  Speaker 3: not having a great time on holiday in a resort
• 49:05
  Speaker 3: going on so far. I was literally there in a
• 49:07
  Speaker 3: camp on im a celebrity, getting out of here, And
• 49:10
  Speaker 3: on day three I was like walking by myself, doing
• 49:14
  Speaker 3: some chores, wasn't saying a lot. I was struggling a
• 49:16
  Speaker 3: little bit, and one of the producers in the interview
• 49:19
  Speaker 3: was like, how are you doing today? And I was like,
• 49:24
  Speaker 3: I just want to just touch them, sam slap.
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: They're fine. I spoke to them before, but I get it.
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: I get the feeling like the first time is the hardest,
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: but I think give the opportunity a chance.
• 49:40
  Speaker 5: How did you feel being away from your kids and
• 49:43
  Speaker 5: actually not even being able to have any contact?
• 49:47
  Speaker 3: Awful? And also targets when you're on a celebrity you
• 49:50
  Speaker 3: have absolutely nothing to keep you occupied, So the days
• 49:55
  Speaker 3: and minutes of the hours they are so so long,
• 49:57
  Speaker 3: and it feels like to I have zero contact is
• 50:01
  Speaker 3: you'll never have a situation where you have those circumstances.
• 50:05
  Speaker 3: I was just like it hurt to miss them so much,
• 50:10
  Speaker 3: but it was great afterwards, Like it's like when you
• 50:12
  Speaker 3: finally see them, you're like, oh, yeah.
• 50:15
  Speaker 2: I do have you I you yeah?
• 50:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah?
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: Because I used to go like when I would travel
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: for work a lot. I would just pace the hotel
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: room because I was like, what do I do now
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: with myself?
• 50:23
  Speaker 2: Because you're so used to being like, what are you doing, stomach,
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: what are you doing?
• 50:26
  Speaker 4: You know, every three minutes?
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: Exactly right? Good callback.
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: And on that note, if you've enjoyed this episode, please
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: I think that's a good ada.
• 50:34
  Speaker 3: But also know that dota dilemmas mondays, mondays, that's the plan.
• 50:40
  Speaker 3: We all plans are looser at two dining dance.
• 50:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I know, but yeah.
• 50:45
  Speaker 3: So continue to continue.
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: If you've enjoyed this episode, please subscribe. For Thattth's sake,
• 50:49
  Speaker 2: God rings me every day about these subscriptions.
• 50:53
  Speaker 3: Leave a review.
• 50:53
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• 50:58
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• 51:00
  Speaker 3: Two dotend guards, Instagram, TikTok, the Facebook group. We grew
• 51:04
  Speaker 3: one hundred followers. We're now four point seven thousand. That's
• 51:07
  Speaker 3: pretty good, which might sound like not a lot because
• 51:10
  Speaker 3: it's so exclusive, exclusive, great time. The vetting that has
• 51:15
  Speaker 3: to be done before we approve you, not much, and
• 51:19
  Speaker 3: we'll get out of here. Hey, just a little note
• 51:21
  Speaker 3: as well. We have a great episode coming out on Monday.
• 51:23
  Speaker 3: It is with Coaches. He has such great work to
• 51:27
  Speaker 3: raise young men with healthy masculinity.
• 51:29
  Speaker 2: And we definitely need that in this world. So tune in,
• 51:32
  Speaker 2: leave a review, subscribe you already?
• 51:35
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: Whatever, doubled down? Okay, bye about say tell people things
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  Speaker 2: three times? So he's one more.
• 51:40
  Speaker 3: So I've got well said. Hey, share it with your friends.
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• 51:46
  Speaker 3: Shout out to all the duds out there, piercing with directions.
• 51:49
  Speaker 2: Thank you from a distance.
• 52:10
  Speaker 3: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 52:13
  Speaker 3: throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea and community.
• 52:17
  Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 52:20
  Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Islander
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: peoples today. This episode was recorded on gadagal Land