Latest / Did That Age Well? / #166 - Did Mary Kate & Ashley's Passport to Paris age well? (w/ Hannah Popkin)

Transcript

#166 - Did Mary Kate & Ashley's Passport to Paris age well? (w/ Hannah Popkin) · Did That Age Well?

• 0:00
  Hi everybody, welcome to another brand new episode of did that
• 0:03
  age. Well, Hannahs glasses are a
• 0:05
  purposeful choice. They're not just by accident.
• 0:10
  She's channeling Mary Kate. I'm channeling Ashley blue and
• 0:13
  pink. If you know, you know.
• 0:15
  Welcome. So glad that all of you are here
• 0:17
  watching or listening. I've already kind of spoiled it
• 0:21
  a little bit. But my guest today, you know her
• 0:24
  and you love her. If you've been around Denver,
• 0:25
  Comedy Colorado Springs even. Even there.
• 0:31
  Even there, she's she's a woman on the move.
• 0:35
  Very funny, very cool. Welcome to the pod, Hannah.
• 0:39
  It's so good to be here. Thank you, you made me feel
• 0:41
  some. Loved and welcome.
• 0:43
  Well, I love you. I feel like we're about to go on
• 0:45
  an adventure together, just like Mary.
• 0:47
  Kate, The Adventures of Mary Kate.
• 0:49
  Yeah, and your sweatshirt. And that is what my sweatshirt
• 0:51
  does. I was.
• 0:51
  Going to say we can't. We can't blow past that.
• 0:53
  And we're not going to blow past that.
• 0:55
  That also was on purpose. So more.
• 0:58
  Intentional. Shout out to my sister, Amy
• 1:00
  Mallow for getting me this sweatshirt.
• 1:01
  Let's go. It's very kind of you, Hannah.
• 1:05
  What do you have going on? What's going on?
• 1:08
  What are you working on creatively?
• 1:10
  What are you? What are you doing?
• 1:13
  What's going on? Generally.
• 1:15
  Yeah. How do you want to talk about
• 1:17
  it? How are you?
• 1:19
  Do you have anything you? Need I gotta take blouses off?
• 1:22
  Do these Do these hold tears? Is that why they're blue tears?
• 1:27
  Can't. Yeah, No, I appreciate.
• 1:29
  You know what? I appreciate you asking.
• 1:31
  We're doing comedy. We're doing comedy all over.
• 1:34
  We're we're writing. For.
• 1:36
  It's about to be summertime. Yeah, I'm about to travel.
• 1:39
  I'm about to do some comedy in Wisconsin.
• 1:41
  Oh my gosh, how fun. It'll be something.
• 1:45
  It'll be. It'll be something.
• 1:47
  It'll be full of cheese. Yes it will.
• 1:50
  We're just, we're just trying to make the people laugh.
• 1:52
  That's good, and in this economy, we need that now more
• 1:56
  than ever. In this economy, I know, you
• 1:58
  know, we're traveling, we're planning.
• 2:00
  Yes, we're making moves. We're making moves.
• 2:03
  We're global citizens. We're trying.
• 2:06
  Yeah, we're trying to, babe. OK, so I was watching this movie
• 2:10
  Passport to Paris, which, OK, not to not going to bury the
• 2:14
  lead. We are talking about passports
• 2:15
  Paris today. So I was watching it while I was
• 2:18
  kind of working and I had to write an intro to this
• 2:22
  newsletter. And basically my one of my
• 2:26
  colleagues was like, hey, I'm having a really hard time with
• 2:29
  this intro. I'm trying to make a connection
• 2:30
  between like this one specific day being the anniversary of the
• 2:35
  eradication of smallpox, trying to like tie that into these
• 2:39
  other themes. And I was like, global citizens.
• 2:46
  I'm glad we, I was like, and you know what?
• 2:49
  You know what's possible when we engage as global?
• 2:53
  Citizen what tell? Me.
• 2:55
  I mean eradicating smallpox. Are we going to eradicate
• 2:59
  smallpox? You know, for RFK to bring it
• 3:01
  back for. RFK to bring it right on back.
• 3:03
  I know. I was literally like, OK, this
• 3:04
  is going out on May 8th. Hopefully there's no one who
• 3:07
  gets smallpox between now and then.
• 3:09
  Yeah. Fuck any blankets in the studio.
• 3:12
  Yeah, yeah, that's. I'm glad you made that
• 3:14
  connection, though. Yeah.
• 3:15
  And thank you so much. I was really, Yeah, I was
• 3:17
  feeling inspired by our girls. This movie is, I don't know how
• 3:21
  immediate we want to get into. It I mean, let's waste no time
• 3:24
  I. Wanted to do a Mary Kane Ashley
• 3:27
  movie We talked about our lips are sealed.
• 3:29
  We couldn't find it. Couldn't find it.
• 3:30
  What the fuck? It was sealed, truly sealed.
• 3:33
  Could not be sealed anymore. In the witness protection
• 3:35
  program, yeah, but that's okay, because this is the start.
• 3:39
  This is the start of these ladies developing romantic.
• 3:45
  Yes. All over the world.
• 3:47
  All over the world, yes, but it's very there's like a
• 3:50
  political subplot. Absolutely it was.
• 3:52
  Maybe unnecessary. Actually, I think for the sake
• 3:56
  of diplomacy. Yeah, for the sake of clean.
• 4:00
  Water in France? Yeah.
• 4:02
  Do you not care about clean water in France?
• 4:04
  Yeah, I don't. Again, for the viewers, this is
• 4:06
  a subplot that happens, but they actually I think they enact.
• 4:09
  Like a treaty? Yeah, a water treaty.
• 4:12
  Hmm. Like, that's no small feat.
• 4:14
  No, and but it's great because they enact the water treaty and
• 4:17
  then they're like, when do we get to dance with Boyd?
• 4:19
  And then they do that about. And then they do that.
• 4:22
  Which I appreciate. I honestly girls, they contain
• 4:26
  multitudes. They do, they do, they do, and I
• 4:29
  love that about them. I also feel as though maybe
• 4:31
  these girls should be the new Pope.
• 4:33
  That's kind of how I was feeling when.
• 4:36
  Who do we need to talk to in the conclave?
• 4:39
  Get me in that conclave girl, and I will.
• 4:42
  Mary Kate not listen, the doors are going to get sealed too, and
• 4:45
  we need to get Mary Kate and actually.
• 4:48
  In the that in. The yeah, that is.
• 4:50
  Is there a very actually movie I took the glasses off?
• 4:55
  I can the glasses, Yeah. The that moment has passed with
• 4:58
  the glasses. Is there a Mary Kate and Ashley
• 5:01
  go to the Vatican? Can you imagine?
• 5:03
  Well, they do go to Rome. Yeah.
• 5:05
  It's like. So it's like like right nearby.
• 5:07
  It's not that far, just. The opening is just the Pope is
• 5:10
  dead, and then they're like time to go.
• 5:15
  Time to go Seal the doors, ladies.
• 5:18
  Seal the doors, ladies. Our lips are sealed.
• 5:21
  Who are we voting for? Our Lips Are Sealed would be the
• 5:24
  perfect title of the movie that takes place in the Vatican.
• 5:28
  It's time. It's time to come back.
• 5:30
  Maria Ashley. All right, all right, ladies.
• 5:33
  It's all right, ladies, it's time to come back.
• 5:35
  But you know, there's so much to say.
• 5:38
  There's so. Much.
• 5:39
  There's so much to say. We got to get going.
• 5:41
  These girls, they were 13 and they were the executive sorry
• 5:46
  and the. Movie they were 12 I'm sorry in
• 5:47
  the. Movie.
• 5:48
  They were 12. I didn't.
• 5:49
  They were either 12 or 13 when this movie came out, so they
• 5:52
  probably made it when they were 12.
• 5:54
  Well, maybe the fact that they ever executive produced anything
• 5:57
  around the age of 13 for sure makes me want to die.
• 6:02
  What the? Fuck have I done in my life.
• 6:06
  And you know we were speculating off mic.
• 6:09
  Is it legal? Is that, is that, is that legal?
• 6:14
  Is that what's going on with child labor in Hollywood?
• 6:18
  Hollywood. I know.
• 6:19
  You know, it's funny when you're watching this movie in your 30s
• 6:22
  because it's. It takes a bit of the whimsy
• 6:25
  out. Yeah.
• 6:25
  Or immediately. Yeah.
• 6:26
  You and I were talking about this, but I was like, you think
• 6:28
  they still talk? Yeah.
• 6:29
  You think. You think they're OK?
• 6:31
  You think they're good, You think they still.
• 6:33
  Hang out. Yeah, but then you.
• 6:35
  But then you watch it and you're like, they're fine.
• 6:37
  They've got to be. They've got to be they.
• 6:39
  Can do anything in the. Age of like, because now it's
• 6:42
  all YouTube. It's like none of those kids
• 6:44
  have rights anymore, you know what I mean?
• 6:46
  Especially the ones who are the children of like family talk,
• 6:52
  yes, like mom talk, mom fluencer, mom fluencers and the
• 6:56
  dad fluencers and. That's crazy because you, at
• 6:59
  least back then, didn't have to see the mom and the dad like for
• 7:02
  America. I know, I know.
• 7:04
  Literally, you know, their parents were like back there,
• 7:07
  like smile. Girl.
• 7:08
  Smile. And I like that in every movie
• 7:11
  that they did, they cast, like, different parents.
• 7:14
  Yeah, it was so fun. You're disposed.
• 7:16
  It's like literally you're disposable.
• 7:18
  Disposable and these boys, they are on a rot.
• 7:21
  They're on rotation. Have you ever had like a a
• 7:25
  vacation romance like Mary Kate and Ashley?
• 7:28
  I you know what I did? My first boyfriend ever?
• 7:31
  No, we were five years shut. So I thought how?
• 7:36
  Whimsy it was. That's incredibly whimsical.
• 7:39
  I think I I think maybe I took passport to Paris to heart.
• 7:42
  Yeah, he did. Like I was where?
• 7:44
  Where were you on a trip? Where'd you go?
• 7:45
  I studied abroad in Scotland my. God.
• 7:48
  She studied abroad in Edinburgh. Abroad.
• 7:51
  Wow, and I fell in love on the cobblestone streets.
• 7:54
  Shut up. That is like our girl.
• 7:56
  Oh. Just like our girl, I'm back.
• 7:57
  Glasses are back on. They are back.
• 8:00
  I'm back. I'm Mary Kate.
• 8:02
  Oh my. God wow, that's so beautiful.
• 8:05
  Yeah, it was it. Honestly highly recommend.
• 8:08
  I I absolutely agree. And these girls are 12 in the
• 8:11
  movie. They are, and they're doing it.
• 8:13
  And that's. Yeah, so we all could.
• 8:16
  We all could. And, you know, also, I think we
• 8:19
  need to address like, even how they get to France because that
• 8:21
  in itself, in the context of this movie, yeah, I found funny,
• 8:27
  which was basically that they were excited to go to a dance.
• 8:31
  Yeah. And then their parents were
• 8:33
  like. Their world.
• 8:35
  Your world so. Small.
• 8:38
  Yeah, you. Hear about teen girls.
• 8:40
  Yeah, and they're like, these girls need to go to France.
• 8:44
  Yeah, they need to get out of there.
• 8:46
  What did they say? Their world is the size of a
• 8:49
  pinhead. Well.
• 8:52
  And that's what that struck me too.
• 8:53
  Everyone in this movie is kind of an asshole.
• 8:56
  These girls in the first, my first note was, are they
• 9:00
  bullies? That's.
• 9:01
  You're talking about this scene where they.
• 9:02
  Yeah, with lunch. Yeah.
• 9:04
  There are two girls who seem perfectly nice.
• 9:07
  They're not mean. They're just cheerleaders.
• 9:09
  They're just cheerleaders and they're cute, OK?
• 9:11
  And they go up to them and they're like, ha ha ha.
• 9:14
  There's E coli in the food. That you're eating and then they
• 9:18
  take bugs. And put them in their food.
• 9:21
  Yeah, so that they can then swoop in and take Kyle and Chad
• 9:25
  or whatever their name. Sorry, Shane and my something.
• 9:29
  Yeah, no. When you watch it, you're like,
• 9:31
  you two were the bullies the whole time, which is maybe what
• 9:34
  their parents maybe they were like.
• 9:36
  Maybe they said we need to get them out of the country so that
• 9:39
  they can be. Develop empathy.
• 9:41
  Yeah, develop some empathy. You know where empathy was built
• 9:44
  was Paris. Paris that was actually
• 9:46
  originally with Napoleon. Napoleon, who is brought up like
• 9:50
  4 times. For sure.
• 9:51
  Yeah. They were like, what's French
• 9:54
  escargot? No baguettes.
• 9:58
  Oh my God, when the chef walked in with a bag full of baguettes.
• 10:01
  There are, I think I noted when I watched it.
• 10:04
  There are three scenes with just a bag of baguettes.
• 10:08
  Yeah, and I was like, this is culture.
• 10:12
  It is culture and it is culture. I do love that.
• 10:16
  Like the whole premise of French food is like EW it's gross.
• 10:20
  Yeah. I mean, they don't do yes, but
• 10:23
  they don't do a great job of making it not.
• 10:25
  Look gross, right? Yeah, it just kind of looks like
• 10:29
  oh, it's fancy food. Yeah, it's not McDonald's, which
• 10:33
  I love that I don't think. Like, I think that this was in
• 10:36
  an era before, like everything was product placement.
• 10:39
  Like, I do not think that they had a deal with McDonald's.
• 10:42
  I think they truly were just like, how can we introduce
• 10:45
  America to this character? You know how I know they didn't
• 10:48
  have a deal with McDonald's? Why is that they the McDonald's
• 10:53
  cheeseburger in that movie looks like shit when they take it out
• 10:57
  of the bag. Yeah.
• 10:59
  It's it they make. It's like stomped on.
• 11:01
  Yeah. No, it was.
• 11:02
  It's. Like.
• 11:04
  It look the. Fries are strewn about.
• 11:07
  No wonder that incredible chef was like, look at this shit.
• 11:12
  I know. It's there is a lot of food
• 11:16
  specific stuff, a lot of food stuff, Yeah.
• 11:19
  And you're right. They're like pee.
• 11:21
  Yeah. And then there's this part where
• 11:23
  they they give them wine and they spit.
• 11:25
  It on their face, yeah. She takes a big swig of what she
• 11:28
  thinks is grape juice. Have you ever done that?
• 11:30
  Like, did you ever do that as a kid?
• 11:31
  Like accidentally take a big swig of something and discover
• 11:34
  it was alcohol. It was alcohol trying to
• 11:36
  remember. I think maybe beer.
• 11:38
  Oh. God, and I think I was like that
• 11:40
  doesn't taste like Sprite. Well, it certainly doesn't look
• 11:43
  like it either, no. That's very good.
• 11:47
  You know what? I should have looked at it.
• 11:48
  Why should have looked? I have, I have had, you know,
• 11:52
  like the ash can. Like the ash.
• 11:54
  Yeah, the ash beer. Yeah, I've drinking that.
• 11:57
  Oh, multiple times. Oh God.
• 11:59
  That's not that doesn't have the wind multiple.
• 12:02
  Times girl, are you OK? I don't.
• 12:04
  I don't. I'm not.
• 12:06
  I don't know, I don't know. That's like Mary King Ashley.
• 12:11
  That's like a dark version. That's like the Softy Brothers
• 12:14
  version. Drinking.
• 12:15
  Out. Of cigarette.
• 12:19
  Butts. Cigarette butts.
• 12:23
  Drinking out of the spit camp. Yeah, they're being chased,
• 12:29
  Grimy. Streets of New York you can do.
• 12:32
  That's why they had to go into witness protection and our lips
• 12:34
  are sealed actually. And they become.
• 12:37
  Famously, they've never had two people play the Pope like they
• 12:43
  did. You know how in Full House both
• 12:46
  of them played one character? Yeah, I'd like to see them do
• 12:49
  that. For the for the Pope, for the
• 12:52
  Pope, For the Pope as the Pope. We only know which one it is,
• 12:56
  but if it's a blue robe or a fable robe.
• 13:00
  Be like, oh, that's how it goes. Oh yeah, that's Mary Kay.
• 13:03
  That's actually. Yeah, for sure.
• 13:05
  Yeah, sure. I also like that one of the
• 13:08
  first people that we meet is named Francois, who is.
• 13:15
  It I don't. Remember, like what?
• 13:16
  He's like a Butler or something. Something the bumbling.
• 13:19
  Butler. Yes.
• 13:21
  OK. So for the listeners, if you
• 13:22
  haven't watched. We should give.
• 13:24
  A passport to Paris. I mean, it's there's not a lot
• 13:30
  of spoilers or twists, so you probably have already gleaned
• 13:34
  100% of the plot already. But if not, if you haven't seen
• 13:38
  it in a minute and you want a little recap, I'm going to give
• 13:40
  it to you. These two girls whose names I
• 13:42
  have already forgotten. Allison and Madison or
• 13:44
  something, I think. Absolutely.
• 13:45
  I think. Yeah, I think.
• 13:47
  That's right, McKenzie, Maddie and Maddie and.
• 13:50
  Maddie and Ally maybe? I think so.
• 13:53
  These girls, they go to France to visit their grandpa who is
• 13:58
  the ambassador France. He's a fancy guy, kind of.
• 14:03
  They always talk about how he's so uptight and unloving and he
• 14:06
  seems quite normal. He's literally fine.
• 14:09
  He's very nice. And his his assistant, this guy
• 14:13
  Jeremy, who just fucking loves France and he loves diplomacy.
• 14:17
  And he has this great opportunity to live in Paris
• 14:19
  working for the French ambassador.
• 14:21
  And he has to be a tour guide to 212 year olds, to our bullies,
• 14:24
  as we've established. They're really mean to him.
• 14:26
  And they are mean to him and they ditch him and they and they
• 14:29
  blackmail him and they manipulate him into letting them
• 14:32
  do whatever they want, sure. And eventually they're.
• 14:35
  For a week and they're. For.
• 14:37
  This. Week yeah, they OK you what you
• 14:41
  your agenda yeah right. Was on the itinerary.
• 14:45
  What you got? A jungle.
• 14:46
  Man. So they so they go, they meet
• 14:52
  these two French boys, and then they.
• 14:56
  My. Girl, as if I remember.
• 14:58
  I watched it this. Morning watched, I just finished
• 15:01
  it an hour ago. Jeremy and.
• 15:08
  What a. Chance to speak English.
• 15:10
  And that's so I know. I love him.
• 15:13
  I actually loved him the most. I love the other one.
• 15:15
  Really, we are, we are Mary Kate and Ashley.
• 15:18
  That's perfect. And that's how the world goes
• 15:20
  around. And they but obviously they
• 15:24
  don't care either because they truly are like, they don't know
• 15:28
  which one of us is which. We don't know which one of which
• 15:31
  is is them. And then when they go back home
• 15:33
  and they see those two boys who had originally asked him to
• 15:36
  dance, they're like, what are your names?
• 15:38
  Yeah, I loved that. That was very feminine.
• 15:40
  That was there and that was, and that was an important moment for
• 15:43
  feminism. That was the part I never quite
• 15:45
  caught as a kid. Yeah, obviously I was like, oh.
• 15:48
  What do you mean not caring about what boys think?
• 15:50
  Yeah, that part I didn't get. Yeah, maybe I just turned it
• 15:52
  off, Yeah. Before the blooper reel or.
• 15:56
  The edge was also what we can get there.
• 15:57
  Oh. Girl.
• 15:58
  Well, I don't. Even know if it was a blooper
• 16:00
  reel as much as it was just Mary Kate and actually screwing up
• 16:02
  their lines. They were like line.
• 16:06
  Yeah. It's like Ashley Olsen.
• 16:08
  I was like, that's not. Funny.
• 16:10
  No child abuse. I know literally these kids.
• 16:14
  Executive producing girl. I know.
• 16:17
  That level of responsibility, I know.
• 16:19
  Anyway, so then they eat weird French food and they're like,
• 16:21
  oh, France is such a drag. Except when we meet a supermodel
• 16:27
  who encourages us to chase our bliss and and then they
• 16:34
  basically save water in France. And that's that's the movie.
• 16:41
  I can't think of a better way to describe it.
• 16:43
  They do save water. There's a water packed.
• 16:46
  There's a water. Treaty.
• 16:48
  A water treaty. I'm so sorry.
• 16:50
  And they serve. We'll get it.
• 16:52
  There's a dinner and they serve. Doesn't matter, the boys.
• 16:59
  Matter. Boys matter.
• 17:01
  Basically. And they teach their grandpa how
• 17:02
  to love again. They do.
• 17:04
  They take him back to the place of World War 2.
• 17:07
  When I met your grandmother, Yeah.
• 17:09
  He's like, we don't really talk. Yeah.
• 17:11
  Do we girls? Do we girls?
• 17:13
  I'm like, I don't know, It seems like you kind of.
• 17:15
  He seemed perfectly nice to me. He was a.
• 17:17
  The second they arrived, he's like my girls and he like gives
• 17:20
  them a kiss and they're like this flick and they're like.
• 17:22
  Oh my God, I hate him. He hates us.
• 17:25
  And also like, yeah, he's just like a professional person.
• 17:29
  Yeah, that's really like, that's it.
• 17:31
  He's just not like a zany guy. Yeah, there are a lot of lines
• 17:36
  in this movie that you could tell were written by adults or
• 17:41
  kids. Yeah, where it'll be like, my
• 17:43
  mom and dad don't get anything. I do.
• 17:45
  It's like what? OK.
• 17:50
  Yeah, like. There's a part where they're
• 17:52
  like talking to the French boys and the one of the French boys,
• 17:55
  the one I like. Yeah, the one you like, the one
• 17:58
  who speaks more English, which a little a little nationalist of
• 18:03
  you. Yeah, yeah.
• 18:04
  Can't hate it, sorry, I just hate the the Frenchies.
• 18:08
  Sorry, the Frenchies, Yeah, they speak English, am I right?
• 18:11
  Speak English. Come on.
• 18:13
  Yeah, that's why I hated yours. Not not English.
• 18:16
  Yeah, totally mine. Why?
• 18:20
  I liked him. OK, OK.
• 18:22
  He's a poet. Yeah, that he he likes Arch.
• 18:25
  Yeah. He's in a band called the.
• 18:27
  Video. Oh, I I wrote it down.
• 18:30
  You know the video heads. The video heads.
• 18:32
  Yeah, which honestly, I like dated somebody who's like, where
• 18:38
  are the video heads now? There's a.
• 18:40
  VH1 like where are. Yeah, the where are the now?
• 18:43
  They opened for Phantom Planet. Ums lineup just dropped today,
• 18:49
  dropped today. They're here.
• 18:51
  They're here. They're over at the Fillmore,
• 18:54
  but he's, he's in a band. He's he's, he's the, he's the
• 18:58
  smart one. Okay, yeah, yeah.
• 19:01
  And, and you say that because he speaks English, you know, and.
• 19:04
  We're going back to my yeah, to my biases.
• 19:07
  Yeah, yeah. But there's a there's a part
• 19:09
  where they're walking and he's he wants to be in a band, but
• 19:13
  his dad is a butcher. He said, yeah, his dad is a
• 19:16
  butcher. And he's like, I want you to
• 19:19
  take over the family business. And he's like, that's not my
• 19:21
  dream, dad. That's your dream.
• 19:23
  Yeah. I want to play music.
• 19:24
  Yeah. And imagine at 12 years old your
• 19:27
  parent telling you, I want you to take over the family
• 19:30
  business. Which is and then I think he has
• 19:32
  a line where he's like filet mignon.
• 19:34
  What's important to like that was my French accent.
• 19:38
  How did I do? Nailed it just about as well as
• 19:41
  those actors did. Boys, those boys.
• 19:44
  Yours specifically had a very we'll get it, but you know, he
• 19:49
  yours specifically had a strong accent, but there's this part
• 19:52
  where where I think Ashley or Mary Kate, I don't fucking know
• 19:54
  which ones. I don't.
• 19:55
  I don't know which ones. Talking the entire movie.
• 19:58
  Yeah, for sure it. Doesn't matter, which is
• 19:59
  probably why they have issues now, but. 100% yes, absolutely.
• 20:03
  Yeah. Hopefully they still talk.
• 20:05
  They hopefully they. Still, hopefully, they still
• 20:07
  talk. They're like, she's like, well,
• 20:09
  I guess that's one thing. Like, doesn't matter if you're
• 20:12
  American or French. Like our parents just don't
• 20:14
  understand. Us and that's how you know, it's
• 20:16
  like written by an adult for preteen.
• 20:18
  Some fucking 42 year old in LA was like.
• 20:22
  Yeah, I got. This OH.
• 20:23
  I nailed it. Yeah, and they do a lot of
• 20:26
  radical preteen. Speak in this movie 100% yeah.
• 20:29
  When they're looking for an insult for for that guy Jeremy,
• 20:34
  they're like, it makes you kind of look like A and like you
• 20:38
  think they're going to say pussy and then they say chicken.
• 20:45
  Hermie's like, oh, that hurts. That hurts so much more.
• 20:48
  Called a chicken by a 12 year old.
• 20:51
  And he really gave gets a relationship.
• 20:54
  With these girls, he does. Because, I mean, this is the
• 20:58
  plotline that kills me the most. Tell me is, you know, these
• 21:01
  girls, they're the whole water thing happens.
• 21:04
  They meet these boys. They feel their grandpa.
• 21:06
  They, they're, they, they want, they, they want to see the real
• 21:10
  Paris, which is, again, just not museums.
• 21:13
  Yeah. Yeah, they're like, Jeremy takes
• 21:16
  them to museums. They're like.
• 21:18
  I got to see the Louvre, yeah, But then when they see the.
• 21:21
  Real Paris. It's just.
• 21:22
  Them on a Vespa. Yeah, it's the same Paris,
• 21:25
  they're just on a Vespa instead of in a car.
• 21:27
  They're just sightseeing and then they they do a thing with
• 21:30
  baguettes. Yeah, that's right.
• 21:33
  Can OK French listeners if you exist, can 12 year olds like Dr.
• 21:41
  Vespas? I looked this up.
• 21:43
  And thank you for that. I looked this up and here's what
• 21:45
  I do want to say. We're going to, if we're going
• 21:47
  to clip anything, we need to clip this, OK?
• 21:50
  Get ready. Passport in Paris walked so that
• 21:53
  The Lizzie McGuire Movie could run.
• 21:55
  Wow, OK, that's a big. Thing to sell.
• 21:58
  I believe that's a big thing to say.
• 21:59
  Bully because both. Of them are these 12 year old.
• 22:02
  Yeah, girls. Yeah, they're in junior high.
• 22:04
  They're in junior high with no adult super agent who meet these
• 22:08
  boys and get on Vespas. OK, period.
• 22:11
  And and like, it doesn't look safe.
• 22:14
  And I so I looked it up because I said, what's going on?
• 22:17
  What is this? What is this phenomenon?
• 22:19
  What is this lawless place in? Cinema.
• 22:21
  Yeah. What do we do?
• 22:22
  Yeah. And in in France, you can
• 22:24
  legally drive a Vespa at age 14. Oh.
• 22:28
  So I think these boys are. We're gonna, we're.
• 22:30
  Older, older boys. In this movie, I'm going to say
• 22:34
  they're fourteen. In the Lizzie McGuire movie, I
• 22:35
  think that. I think he's like 17.
• 22:38
  Yeah. At least.
• 22:39
  Which we don't. We don't need to touch.
• 22:41
  And look, we don't need to go there.
• 22:45
  We don't need to go there with Paolo.
• 22:47
  Yeah, we don't need to talk about Paolo because these boys
• 22:49
  are good boys. They are.
• 22:50
  They are. They're honest.
• 22:51
  But you. Can ride a Vespa 14.
• 22:54
  Wow. In France it looks good for
• 22:56
  them. It seems kind of like the
• 22:59
  American equivalent of like, at what age can you drive a golf
• 23:01
  cart? Sure.
• 23:02
  You know, and I think it's probably 14 if I had to guess.
• 23:05
  Yeah, that's yeah. Mary Kate and Ashley go to
• 23:08
  Highlands Ranch. Passport to Highlands Ranch
• 23:12
  Highlands. Ranch but Jeremy in the movie he
• 23:16
  gets the model girlfriend. That so that plot line for you
• 23:20
  is really what what gets. Well, I just don't understand
• 23:23
  these girls. Meet a supermodel.
• 23:25
  Yeah, at a cafe. She's just right there.
• 23:29
  And this bitch has nothing better to do.
• 23:35
  Than talk to kids. She gives up.
• 23:37
  She gives up her whole life. She's like, you want to come to
• 23:41
  my photo shoot? She goes to the boys school
• 23:45
  dance. Yeah, she chaperones it.
• 23:47
  Yeah, she meets. This dweeb.
• 23:50
  Jeremy I do love that she was like a hottie with brains,
• 23:55
  though. They were like, look, she's not
• 23:57
  just pretty, she's. Smart.
• 24:01
  She's going to grad school. Yeah.
• 24:02
  Getting PhD I'm so sorry HD so sorry.
• 24:06
  Even I'm minimizing her brain. Yeah.
• 24:08
  Yeah, exactly. And that's, you know, that is
• 24:11
  the plight of pretty people, yes.
• 24:13
  You know, always getting getting glossed over for their
• 24:18
  opportunities at international relation.
• 24:20
  Yeah. It must be so.
• 24:21
  Hard. It must be hard to be.
• 24:23
  Hot. Yeah, for sure.
• 24:24
  So hard. You know, but well.
• 24:27
  I mean, we can't keep talking about it, look.
• 24:30
  Pretty privilege. We're getting a reputation.
• 24:33
  We're talking about this all the time.
• 24:36
  People are like, stop talking about your pretty privilege.
• 24:38
  Yeah, I get it. They're like.
• 24:40
  That in international relations, yeah, Never stop, yet stop.
• 24:43
  It beautiful mouth that's pretty pretty.
• 24:47
  I can't even listen to what they're saying.
• 24:53
  So yeah, they're super their new supermodel friend who is, you
• 24:58
  know, a real girl's girl. She's like hey guys, be my
• 25:01
  friend. Like come see me at my photo.
• 25:04
  She's. Lonely, I say she.
• 25:05
  Is deeply lonely. She talks about how she doesn't
• 25:08
  have time for boyfriends because she's always traveling.
• 25:12
  Yet she has time. And yet she has time to drop
• 25:14
  everything to hang out with 12 year olds for the whole week.
• 25:18
  I can't have a boyfriend. Yeah, I can't hang out with Leo
• 25:20
  DiCaprio in his yacht. But yeah, but you girls.
• 25:25
  Let's go shopping. Let's go shopping.
• 25:27
  Yeah, buy some cowboy hats. I.
• 25:29
  Love that cowboy hats in Paris. Really flipping the narrative.
• 25:33
  What you'd expect. Yeah, I also did.
• 25:38
  I think we do have to talk about the green screen at the Louvre.
• 25:41
  Unfortunately, Mary Kate and Ashley could not rent out the
• 25:44
  Louvre like Beyoncé and Jay-Z. They.
• 25:48
  Mild. They just use a green screen and
• 25:51
  and I really like the way that they they went from.
• 25:54
  OK, so we're pretending like they're just walking through the
• 25:56
  Louvre into. We are in hell.
• 26:00
  Yeah, now we are. We have been sucked into a
• 26:03
  vortex of boredom and painting. Yeah.
• 26:06
  These girls are getting a free guided tour at the Louvre.
• 26:12
  Yeah. Kids are.
• 26:13
  So. They're like, we just want to be
• 26:17
  on a Vespa. Not only that, but as you
• 26:20
  stated, I we can't state this enough, the aesthetic choices
• 26:24
  that were made. It's kind of like early
• 26:27
  PowerPoint transitions. Oh yeah, it's a lot of.
• 26:30
  Yes, it's a lot of very jarring, like.
• 26:37
  That is the perfect way to describe it.
• 26:39
  Yeah. And it's very, there is
• 26:40
  something very like bad trip. It's like 4 second bad trip.
• 26:45
  It's like when you have a flashback to a bad trip.
• 26:47
  That's actually never happened to me.
• 26:49
  But you know, some people when they say, like, oh, I cracked my
• 26:50
  neck and then I like, went back to this place of a bad trip for
• 26:54
  four seconds. Yeah.
• 26:55
  Yeah, it's like Salvia. Solvia at the Louvre.
• 27:00
  Solvia at the Louvre. Yeah, it's yeah.
• 27:03
  It's a bold aesthetic choice. It is funny that they couldn't
• 27:05
  afford it because I feel like if anybody could have, but maybe
• 27:07
  this was before, maybe this was before.
• 27:10
  Maybe before, like before their empire.
• 27:13
  But was it before their empire? I mean, I think that it was they
• 27:15
  were building their empire, but I don't know if they had Beyoncé
• 27:19
  and Jay-Z money yet. Much like Napoleon.
• 27:22
  Exactly. Building an empire.
• 27:24
  Building an empire. Himself, Yeah.
• 27:28
  So then they're like, OK, how are we going to get those boys
• 27:33
  that we saw in those Vespas that we ditched?
• 27:35
  Jeremy J Man love what they call him that.
• 27:38
  J Man. Yeah.
• 27:38
  They're like, how are we going to find them again?
• 27:42
  Yeah. Because that is really like the.
• 27:44
  That's whimsy when you're like, how am I ever going to see this
• 27:47
  person again? Yeah.
• 27:48
  Absolutely. Can I tell you one time I saw a?
• 27:52
  Really hot person on an airplane who I had this like, like very
• 27:56
  brief, like flirty exchange. And by that I mean I was really
• 27:59
  anxious because there was a lot of turbulence.
• 28:01
  He said, Oh, you hate to fly, don't you?
• 28:03
  I said. And I was like, oh ha, ha, ha,
• 28:06
  ha. I wonder if I'll see that person
• 28:07
  again. Sure.
• 28:09
  Well, you were trying to think of life outside of the plane.
• 28:11
  Of course, hoping that it is and there will be a life outside.
• 28:14
  We wait. I will have a future.
• 28:16
  I will have a future and with him, with anybody.
• 28:19
  I will not die. Future will exist you're.
• 28:22
  Protecting yourself. Exactly, exactly.
• 28:24
  We do things to our bodies, you know, the body keeps a score of
• 28:27
  all of that. Or.
• 28:30
  And when I, I was. Sitting next to him.
• 28:33
  Sitting like across the aisle. So yeah, OK, romantic, really
• 28:38
  romantic. But then I so I was like, yeah,
• 28:41
  OK, I'll like, never, obviously never see that person again.
• 28:44
  Great. And then we ended up at the
• 28:46
  same, I was like on my way to a conference and we ended up at
• 28:49
  the same conference. Are you kidding?
• 28:51
  I'm not kidding. What happened?
• 28:53
  Well, girl, I can't say it on air, can I?
• 28:57
  Did you you guys met up? Well, yeah, I like, I was like
• 29:00
  walking by this table. And he was like, hey, I know
• 29:03
  you. You know what?
• 29:06
  He, Mary Kate and Ashley to you. He, Mary Kate and Ashley to me.
• 29:09
  Because he did. He probably didn't even like, he
• 29:12
  probably wasn't even like an attendee of that conference.
• 29:14
  He probably was just like. He he you know what?
• 29:17
  He was there. Yeah.
• 29:19
  Scottsdale or his grandfather was the ambassador.
• 29:23
  Yeah, the ambassador of Reno, of Reno, he.
• 29:27
  He needed to get out. Yeah, he did.
• 29:29
  He did. That so you had a little Mary
• 29:31
  Kate and Ashley moment yourself. I did, yeah.
• 29:34
  That was OK. That was nothing compared to the
• 29:35
  Mary Kate and Ashley moment that I had.
• 29:37
  Shout out to my mom, Peggy Smith, Brenda Pod.
• 29:43
  One time she met this she met this group of travel agents from
• 29:49
  Australia when she was on a river cruise in France.
• 29:52
  Circle back to passports Paris, OK Peggy and river cruises, I
• 29:58
  guess are famously for like really old people.
• 30:00
  Sure, my parents are old, but like they were some of the
• 30:03
  youngest people on this boat other than this group of like 20
• 30:07
  somethings who were from Australia who worked for a
• 30:11
  travel agency. Love.
• 30:13
  And of course, my mom was like, you should date my daughter too.
• 30:18
  She found, she found one travel agent.
• 30:20
  She was like you're, you're hot. I'm going to tell you, I thought
• 30:24
  this story was going to go that your mom hooked up.
• 30:26
  With a bunch of years old. Travelling and that's how my mom
• 30:29
  had an orgy with a. Bunch of and I was going to be
• 30:32
  like and Peggy, that was your Mary Kate.
• 30:34
  And he had her, Mary Kate and Ashley.
• 30:36
  Yeah. So that's where I thought it was
• 30:38
  going, but yeah, set. You up.
• 30:40
  She set me up. She's like, this was in this was
• 30:43
  like a couple years after I graduated college.
• 30:45
  So but like Facebook was still a social media platform that like
• 30:48
  young people used. And she was like, and she was
• 30:51
  like, I showed him your Facebook.
• 30:53
  You should message him. Wow.
• 30:54
  And so I was like, Hey, hope you're having fun with my
• 30:58
  parents on a river cruise. Fast forward a year later, that
• 31:02
  guy and I went on vacation in Hawaii.
• 31:07
  What is this? We had our own Mary Kate
• 31:09
  nationally. You've got a lot of meat.
• 31:11
  Cutes. I have two.
• 31:15
  One perquin you know. Exactly.
• 31:18
  And which one do you want me to share with you?
• 31:20
  Actually, you know what? You know you have your own meat.
• 31:22
  Cute. I fell in love in Scotland.
• 31:24
  I did fall in love, yeah, But that was like, we use Tinder, so
• 31:29
  like. It was still.
• 31:30
  You know, aesthetics were beautiful, you know?
• 31:32
  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The aesthetics were beautiful.
• 31:35
  But, you know, it was, it was fine.
• 31:37
  I don't know if I have that many meat cutes.
• 31:40
  God do I. Smoking cigs outside of an open
• 31:43
  mic like hey I. Haven't.
• 31:46
  Seen you yet? I like your new tag.
• 31:51
  And then I fell in love. Yeah.
• 31:53
  Absolutely. So I don't, I don't know if I
• 31:55
  have. I don't know.
• 31:57
  I don't know if I have that. You know what?
• 31:58
  Actually no, I have one. OK.
• 32:01
  No, I don't know. You want to talk about it?
• 32:05
  I was bad to the bone. But I.
• 32:07
  Think. You know, I guess it doesn't.
• 32:10
  I don't think I have the game of Mary Kate and Ashley.
• 32:13
  How about I'll say that? Let's say that that I always,
• 32:16
  when I was growing up, having watched Mary Kate and Ashley
• 32:19
  movies, you know, like many, many preteen girls did.
• 32:23
  I just thought when I go on vacation, I will meet like the
• 32:28
  first. The first people I will meet are
• 32:30
  going to be good looking boys my age who also think I'm hot.
• 32:36
  Yeah, in my tanky. And they will take me around.
• 32:39
  And they're gonna show me around, they're gonna, they're
• 32:40
  gonna show me around this all inclusive resort in Mexico or
• 32:44
  whatever. You know what I'm you know
• 32:46
  what's so funny? I my first kiss was at a resort
• 32:49
  in Mexico, not with a guy. No way.
• 32:53
  Then he stopped talking to me. No.
• 32:57
  I'm so sorry. Yeah, he kissed me on a boogie
• 32:59
  board. Shut.
• 33:01
  Up Kiss me on a boogie board. Oh, man, that big hit.
• 33:09
  Yeah. And it was at an all inclusive
• 33:10
  in Mexico. You just jogged my memory.
• 33:12
  So that was a Mary Kate Nash. OK, so it seems as though you
• 33:16
  have actually kind of a lot of. You do.
• 33:18
  I mean, I think we're unpacking that.
• 33:19
  Every girl and everybody, maybe. Everybody.
• 33:23
  And The thing is, is I don't think I realized this until I
• 33:26
  watched this time. But these 12 year old girls,
• 33:29
  yeah, they got a lot of ribs. They.
• 33:35
  They all they had to do was stand there and they got truly
• 33:39
  swarmed and encircled by these two boys on best bus.
• 33:45
  They're just standing in the middle and they swoop around.
• 33:48
  They're sorry these like knock the mic these.
• 33:50
  Preteen boy vultures, but it's all these girls.
• 33:56
  The level of fuck boy energy. They really do have it They.
• 34:01
  They literally invite these boys to lunch.
• 34:04
  They go. Jeremy is trying to take them on
• 34:07
  their itinerary day. Trying to take them to the
• 34:11
  fucking Lulu. Loser losers.
• 34:17
  And they're like, actually, Jeremy, this is like, I don't
• 34:20
  remember their names, Renee and Jacques.
• 34:23
  And then they're like, and they're like, and they're going
• 34:27
  to lunch with us. And then they just look back and
• 34:29
  these boys are, they're head over heels for these girls.
• 34:32
  I mean honestly, as as the moral of this story goes, we could all
• 34:40
  take a a note out of their book, a page out of their book.
• 34:43
  I think all of us need to channel 12 year old.
• 34:46
  Yeah, the audacity of entitled 12 year old with pretty
• 34:51
  privilege. Privilege.
• 34:53
  We're walking around. Like actually, actually, Jeremy,
• 34:58
  you dweeb, if you don't act right.
• 35:04
  You're getting fired. You're getting.
• 35:05
  Fired. You've got we've got our your
• 35:07
  future in our tiny hands. Our tiny soft hands.
• 35:14
  All the French boys are kissing me and you will be too.
• 35:18
  Yeah, absolutely. Boys, they take them.
• 35:21
  I mean, they go on, they take them on a on a night time.
• 35:26
  Roof date? Yeah.
• 35:28
  Where did they? One thing I did write down in my
• 35:30
  notes was do they? Have jobs.
• 35:33
  The boys. The boys.
• 35:35
  They're messengers. Oh, that's how they get them.
• 35:38
  That's right. Oh, yeah.
• 35:39
  OK, that I'm going to go back to the width, follow the plot.
• 35:47
  I know the like, I mean the no turns, yeah.
• 35:51
  It's hard. To keep, keep track of all
• 35:54
  these, you know, timelines and multiverse, you know, all of
• 35:57
  that. So these girls, they, they get
• 36:02
  these guys to come back to the, the consulate, the ambassadors
• 36:09
  house, not exactly sure what it's called, but they get them
• 36:13
  to come back because they're like, oh, they, they must work
• 36:18
  for a florist because they gave us flowers.
• 36:21
  So they call the florist and they're like, deliver flowers
• 36:24
  for us. Isn't that right?
• 36:26
  Is that how they come back? That is right.
• 36:28
  Then it's like, Oh my God, there you are.
• 36:29
  OK, That's why I told that like really not very interesting
• 36:32
  story about my flight anxiety and a man I saw again at a
• 36:36
  conference. But.
• 36:38
  It came back. It came.
• 36:39
  See. Him again.
• 36:40
  You know what? Yeah.
• 36:41
  Sometimes. Sometimes people circle back.
• 36:45
  Sometimes. Remember that, everyone.
• 36:47
  Remember that. And sometimes they shouldn't.
• 36:50
  And sometimes they shouldn't. Boundaries.
• 36:52
  Boundaries don't don't pick up the phone.
• 36:56
  Well, and this is a little known fact, but I learned it from that
• 36:59
  from from washing. There's only one florist in
• 37:03
  France. That's actually true, and they
• 37:05
  called him the French florist. His name is Jacques.
• 37:09
  French florist, but his son wants to be a musician and not
• 37:12
  take over the family business. Yeah, and it's causing a lot of.
• 37:15
  Well, and Speaking of the boys, I'd like you to do an impression
• 37:17
  of your boy. No, yeah, this is my podcast.
• 37:20
  You don't. Have to do that.
• 37:22
  You don't get to do that. I think I am the I am the
• 37:26
  Napoleon of this podcast. Not I'm in alert.
• 37:31
  I'm not doing. It is.
• 37:32
  Your boy has the because they're both.
• 37:36
  I would guess they're both. American.
• 37:37
  They are both American. Do you look at supermodel?
• 37:39
  Woman is Italian? It's no.
• 37:43
  French. People.
• 37:44
  There's probably not. I was gonna guess Francois is
• 37:49
  probably not actually French. No, that's Frank.
• 37:52
  Yeah. Do you think that they actually
• 37:54
  did any filming in France? Because I don't know if they
• 38:02
  did, I I assumed yes. But as we're talking about it,
• 38:06
  and as I was thinking about like the weird Louvre thing.
• 38:08
  Yeah, there's like, I mean, they have like a couple of of shots
• 38:15
  of big landmarks, but I they didn't have to like send a crew
• 38:21
  there to get those. Yeah, I don't.
• 38:24
  I don't know if it mattered. And I don't know if it matters
• 38:29
  because as that one boy with the black bucket hat, the poet says,
• 38:34
  yeah, as your boy, 12 year old boy, yeah, can be your son, OK.
• 38:43
  Oh my God. Oh, so God, what was I saying
• 38:50
  about him? Oh, yeah.
• 38:51
  He says, you know, you can't just walk past 200 paintings.
• 38:56
  You got to stop. He teaches her how to look at
• 38:58
  art. And late ladies, am I right?
• 39:00
  Haven't you ever had a man till you look at art?
• 39:03
  And he's like, it's not, it's not just a reflection of
• 39:05
  reality. It's like it's like elevated,
• 39:07
  you know, because there's like light and it's like, see the
• 39:09
  world, be the change you want to see in the world or something
• 39:12
  like that. Yeah.
• 39:14
  Yeah. So that's how we approach this
• 39:15
  movie is that it's, you know, the we, we don't actually see
• 39:20
  France. Sure.
• 39:21
  We. Neither.
• 39:23
  The girls don't see the. Girls certainly don't either,
• 39:26
  but we see the elevated version of it on set in Burbank in the.
• 39:32
  Burbank Lot In the Burbank lot with Mary Kate and Ashley, his
• 39:37
  mom smoked sick. Absolutely sank.
• 39:39
  Girls smile, smile, smile. Girls, you know Rick Steves is
• 39:43
  no. He's like a travel writer.
• 39:45
  He's like a big trout. He's like the.
• 39:46
  Okay. Hi, I'm Rick Steen.
• 39:48
  That guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 39:49
  He always says if you really wanna know a city, you date a
• 39:52
  local. Oh hot.
• 39:55
  And I think maybe I. Always say if you want to see a
• 39:57
  city, watch a Mary Kay nationally.
• 39:59
  Yeah, I'm saying, I mean because as we know from the franchise of
• 40:03
  films that they will later create because then they do our
• 40:05
  lips are sealed, they do the. London one, yeah, they do.
• 40:09
  New York Minute they do Holiday in the Sun.
• 40:11
  Holiday in the sun. They do the one in Rome When in
• 40:18
  Rome, I think it might be called.
• 40:19
  It might be called when in Rome. Roman holiday and that's.
• 40:22
  Not right. Yeah, let's talk.
• 40:24
  Let's talk about the origin of women riding on best buzz with
• 40:27
  locals. Okay, am I right?
• 40:28
  We're like, we're gonna make them 12.
• 40:30
  Yeah. I mean, honestly, I bet she was
• 40:34
  like 12 in that movie, you know? We're gonna, yeah, we're gonna
• 40:38
  channel that. It doesn't matter how the girls
• 40:40
  get there. Yeah.
• 40:42
  As long as they're there, they're there.
• 40:44
  There's no real plot. No, and it does not matter and I
• 40:48
  do not care if there's a plot, but they do They take this movie
• 40:53
  from having no stakes. Sure, other than Jeremy's job.
• 40:56
  Which poor guy? No, and you don't really know
• 40:59
  and. Look, he's a bleep, he's just a
• 41:02
  hard working man who wants a promotion and and and like has
• 41:06
  all this knowledge about international diplomacy instead
• 41:10
  has to babysit yeah, these monsters for one week him for.
• 41:14
  One week he's. Got to do for one week.
• 41:16
  Yeah. These Mean Girls, These Mean
• 41:18
  Girls. Can you imagine if someone said,
• 41:21
  all right, this week? You're going to have to give
• 41:25
  tours and stuff to these two 12 year olds.
• 41:28
  I would be so scared of the ways in which they would insult me
• 41:33
  and exploit me. Yeah.
• 41:34
  That's because you watched Mary Kate Naturally movies.
• 41:36
  I know what they're capable. Of and you know what these girls
• 41:39
  can do, I know and you're going to see them down.
• 41:42
  I know why I'm going to say. What are you doing?
• 41:45
  What are you doing? So, so yeah, they they give
• 41:50
  Jeremy the same advice as they did for when they wanted to
• 41:54
  watch APG 13 movie. They're like literally just like
• 41:57
  be a boss babe, make it happen bad ass.
• 42:00
  Bitch. And he, like, learns to let his
• 42:03
  hair down. Whatever.
• 42:04
  Let's the supermodel take them on a shopping montage.
• 42:06
  But then the the point in which we raise the stakes is when
• 42:14
  Grandpa discovers that they've been fucking around all week,
• 42:17
  not following the itinerary. And he says, girls, you have to
• 42:22
  stay here and have dinner with my fancy friend.
• 42:26
  Yeah, yeah, well, and he finds out because they get arrested.
• 42:30
  Yeah. And they do get arrested, which
• 42:33
  is honestly my favorite part of any Mary Kate and Ashley movie
• 42:36
  is when they do have a run in with law enforcement.
• 42:40
  Similarly in Holiday in the Sun when they end up on a boat where
• 42:43
  someone has like stolen antiquities and like the
• 42:46
  Bahamian police are like coming and storming the boat at me like
• 42:51
  and they have to go to in jail you.
• 42:52
  Gotta go to a baby in. Jail and locked up abroad.
• 42:57
  Yeah, that's my favorite part of Mary Kay and Ashley is when they
• 42:59
  get locked up abroad. You know what's wild?
• 43:01
  I didn't think about this. But.
• 43:02
  And then our lips are sealed. It's like they're with law.
• 43:04
  Enforcement. Yeah, they're not just
• 43:06
  protection. Yeah, they.
• 43:07
  Always get a. Propaganda.
• 43:09
  No, it's this copaganda. No, these girls are
• 43:12
  troublemakers. Yeah, they are.
• 43:14
  They're a gas system. Yeah, they are.
• 43:16
  And they always get out because their grandpa is the ambassador.
• 43:18
  Is the ambassador to France and pretty privileged?
• 43:21
  Not only yeah, when they exit, they get the cops.
• 43:24
  Drop them off. Oh my God, this line.
• 43:26
  Yeah, well, I don't. They just go like, are we in
• 43:29
  trouble? And it's like.
• 43:32
  You just got a literally flashing lights in the
• 43:35
  background and they say we got a ride home.
• 43:38
  Yeah. Yes, yes, we got a ride home.
• 43:40
  These bitch this is. If a 12 year old said that to
• 43:43
  me. I would.
• 43:45
  That's when I that's when I think it's OK to hit a kid,
• 43:47
  yeah. This is the thing, I don't think
• 43:50
  these girls learn one lesson. They well, they read they read
• 43:57
  that dweebs paper, Jerry about about water and that and then
• 44:02
  they learned a lot so that they could use that as a there's
• 44:05
  mercury power movement, there's mercury in the water, there's
• 44:08
  rules. That's bad.
• 44:10
  You know what? This reminds me, Oh, my God, At
• 44:14
  the beginning of the movie, somebody says something about
• 44:17
  how they used to they were, like, planning on having some
• 44:20
  sort of Olympic event in the sun.
• 44:22
  But then they were like, yeah, but the water's too dirty.
• 44:25
  They were foreshadowing. They were foreshadowing the
• 44:27
  Olympics. Wow.
• 44:28
  Yeah, and if you watch later, they foreshadowed the election.
• 44:35
  Girl, that is so. Yeah, yeah.
• 44:37
  Did you see that scene where they stormed the capital?
• 44:39
  You they actually didn't flash to the Twin Towers and they were
• 44:45
  they were still. There.
• 44:46
  They were still there. Yeah, they were like, we're not
• 44:48
  editing it out. No, we can't.
• 44:50
  Because soon you won't be able to.
• 44:54
  It was dark. Dark, dark, dark way.
• 44:57
  A lot going on under the surface.
• 44:59
  This is and that's. Why We're here to examine.
• 45:02
  I know it's. Yeah, these girls are, you know,
• 45:05
  it's funny because, you know, and this is kind of a whole sub
• 45:09
  genre of like film and television now, OK, you know,
• 45:13
  but it's kind of like girls who you shouldn't root for at all.
• 45:16
  They're just bitches. I don't want to call these
• 45:19
  total. Girls, bitches.
• 45:21
  But they are. All nice, but they're not.
• 45:24
  Nice they're. Not nice.
• 45:26
  It's not teaching teens to be nice, but I root for them the
• 45:30
  whole time of. Course.
• 45:32
  And I think part of it is the accessories.
• 45:35
  Part of it, girl. I think.
• 45:38
  Big, big time. They're anti heroes.
• 45:40
  They are. They're Fleabag.
• 45:42
  They're girls. They're, they're Breaking Bad.
• 45:45
  They're yeah, they're Breaking Bad.
• 45:48
  They are every Yeah, they're hacks that they're.
• 45:51
  Hacks. Oh my God.
• 45:53
  Yeah, that passport to Paris was the prequels.
• 45:57
  Hacks. For sure this is.
• 45:59
  It is what it is. And I, I, you don't.
• 46:02
  Yeah. You just cannot root for them,
• 46:04
  right? You cannot likely.
• 46:06
  I know not everybody likes them, even the.
• 46:08
  Supermodel. Even that supermodel who?
• 46:11
  So lonely. Yeah, who gets with Jeremy?
• 46:13
  Who, by the way, I, I can't phrase this enough, this guy I
• 46:17
  I'm honestly like, I just think was one the only casting choice
• 46:23
  that I thought was not good. And what would you have done
• 46:28
  differently? I would.
• 46:29
  Have made him. Hot.
• 46:30
  You would have made him hot. I don't.
• 46:32
  I just like I get his dweeby. Yeah, you know what I mean?
• 46:35
  I don't know, I can't see him with a supermodel.
• 46:38
  You said this is where my suspension of disbelief ends,
• 46:42
  not these girls hopping on a Vespa.
• 46:45
  I'm all in. No, we're all in with that.
• 46:48
  But that this fucking bozo was able to bag a hottie like that?
• 46:54
  Come on, haven't you ever seen a weird looking guy with a
• 46:59
  gorgeous woman? I.
• 47:01
  Think right. Everything you're saying is
• 47:04
  correct. But still, something in your
• 47:07
  heart says I won't accept. It I'm watching.
• 47:09
  This movie at 32, yeah. It's like, yeah, girls.
• 47:14
  Get it, girls. Girls and the second this man
• 47:18
  was very nice, Yeah. Finds love and they also bond
• 47:21
  over diplomacy because she's really into that too.
• 47:23
  Yeah, I'm just like what the fuck is this hack shit I can't
• 47:27
  do. I need to analyze myself.
• 47:30
  I know. And that's what these movies
• 47:32
  really invite us to look inward when he says he's a vanilla kind
• 47:39
  of guy and she says she likes Chocolate Girl.
• 47:45
  We know who the Dom in that room.
• 47:46
  Yeah, am I right? Yeah, he also does go to a teen
• 47:49
  dance. Yeah, they both do.
• 47:52
  So that's kind of. He wasn't invited.
• 47:55
  And they go, Jeremy, what are you doing here?
• 47:58
  And they're like, this is Jeremy's last chance to
• 48:00
  chaperone. The.
• 48:08
  Adults in Mary Kate and Ashley movies have lives.
• 48:11
  No, certainly not. Even if they're supermodels,
• 48:14
  they just don't they. Don't have their sole function
• 48:17
  is to make these girls dreams come true.
• 48:20
  These girls are the hell mouth, yes?
• 48:23
  They are the center. Of.
• 48:25
  Everything of everything as they should be.
• 48:29
  Let's see the remember when one of them, Mary Kate, Ashley,
• 48:36
  Maddie Alley, who knows, She says that one day when she was
• 48:42
  9, she talks about it like, you know, I'm sorry, hit the mic.
• 48:46
  She's like, yeah, when I was young, 9, we went to Disneyland,
• 48:53
  and I thought, it doesn't get better than this.
• 48:55
  Yes. And guess what?
• 48:59
  This is better than that. Can you imagine a more profound
• 49:02
  compliment from a 12 year old bully than that?
• 49:07
  No, you can't Imagine. Not only.
• 49:09
  That your cadence was spot on. That's exactly This is like a
• 49:12
  very dramatic, deep moment in the film.
• 49:15
  It is the film the. Film Capital F Film this is.
• 49:20
  This is probably where things are the most serious in the
• 49:24
  entire film. Yeah.
• 49:25
  Is that? Monologue The the everything
• 49:28
  slows. Yeah.
• 49:30
  And she's, you know, we are back.
• 49:32
  She puts us in a place where, like, we close our eyes and
• 49:34
  we're back there with her. We're with Mickey and Minnie,
• 49:37
  imagining the best day of our lives.
• 49:40
  And also she says it's our first time going to Disneyland.
• 49:43
  And you know what? I have some questions because
• 49:45
  these girls, they go to junior high in LA.
• 49:48
  Yes, they do. And they obviously have the kind
• 49:51
  of money where they can just, or their parents can say your world
• 49:54
  view is too small. You're going to Paris tomorrow.
• 49:56
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 49:58
  Here's their first time at Disneyland.
• 50:00
  Yeah. Get real.
• 50:01
  Get real. See, now you're having trouble.
• 50:03
  So now I that's where my suspension of disbelief stopped.
• 50:07
  You go, you're just like logistics of a fast pass.
• 50:10
  Yeah, that's for these girls. Come on.
• 50:15
  But you know what I do love and this is this is a part that you
• 50:20
  know, I do have to suspend my disbelief and I'm happy to do it
• 50:24
  is when the J man stands up for the girls, J man and he's like,
• 50:28
  hey, boss man, grandpa, perfectly reasonable person, a
• 50:35
  thing or two from these girls and he reads him to filth.
• 50:38
  Yeah, he does. And he and he says I quit.
• 50:41
  No. And and I think the grandpa
• 50:43
  says, doesn't he say you're this close to insubordination?
• 50:46
  Yeah. And then Jamie says I'm about to
• 50:50
  get closer. But we've already established
• 50:54
  that he likes it because he's the vanilla and she's AI think
• 50:58
  he can all. I'm just saying like he kind of
• 51:01
  likes it. He's getting and the girls the
• 51:03
  whole time just watch like they love chaos.
• 51:05
  They love a sense of chaos. Just watching this and then
• 51:09
  Jamie quits. Yeah, he does.
• 51:10
  He get spoiler, he gets rehired. He says you can't fire me.
• 51:14
  I quit. Yeah.
• 51:15
  He gets a promotion, but these girls, I think you just throw
• 51:18
  them in any city. Yeah, in the world.
• 51:20
  Yeah. Explosions.
• 51:22
  And you know what? He really channeled their advice
• 51:26
  about when when they wanted to watch PG13 movies.
• 51:30
  Their strategy of try to show them how mature you are and then
• 51:35
  just whine. Yeah, he kind of did that.
• 51:38
  He was like, I don't like, I don't like that you're mean,
• 51:42
  grandpa. Grandpa, stop.
• 51:44
  It. That's direct communication.
• 51:47
  This is teaching communication skills.
• 51:49
  And and clearly. And it shows.
• 51:52
  Yeah, and it shows. And then it's not a Mary Kate
• 51:55
  and Ashley movie without a scene where they're sticking their
• 51:57
  heads out of a limo. God bless.
• 52:00
  Yeah. And they, what are they saying?
• 52:05
  Which is what is is. That's not Hello.
• 52:08
  I think it's like, hey, no, that's that would be like, so
• 52:16
  yeah. They're just, they're just
• 52:17
  screaming bone I. Think maybe it means goodnight?
• 52:20
  I don't know. Hold on.
• 52:21
  Hey, do you know Jacob? You speak French?
• 52:23
  You speak French, you're not educated.
• 52:26
  Okay, how do I even spell that bone Swatch?
• 52:33
  Bonsoir means good evening. Oh my God, I was great.
• 52:35
  I think it means like good night, good night.
• 52:37
  Good night. They're just saying.
• 52:39
  Yeah. Yeah, they're grandpa.
• 52:41
  Yeah. It's a really beautiful moment.
• 52:42
  It's beautiful. It is.
• 52:43
  Yeah, all three of them sticking their head out of the limo.
• 52:45
  It's family bonding. As it should be.
• 52:49
  Yeah. And then the girls get to snag a
• 52:52
  slow dance. Let's go.
• 52:54
  Oh, wait. No, this is we skipped the
• 52:58
  biggest part, which is of course the water treaty.
• 53:01
  So grandpa's, Dang it, grandpa's like girls, I'm so mad.
• 53:06
  You have to stay home and come to my fancy party with my fancy
• 53:10
  friends and colleagues and they're like snooze I.
• 53:14
  Think the Prime Minister of France is there?
• 53:17
  Yes, I think yes. Mccrone is there.
• 53:20
  But he's not there. Yeah, in blackface actually.
• 53:22
  I would say yeah. Oh no, that was Trudeau.
• 53:26
  Or wasn't Mccrone. That was true.
• 53:28
  But I think it was true. I don't know it was.
• 53:30
  Probably, though. Probably.
• 53:31
  Am I right, ladies? So I I really love how these
• 53:36
  girls said, OK, well we read Jeremy Dweep's paper or his
• 53:43
  proposal about water in France. That one that grandpa didn't
• 53:49
  take 5 minutes to read. We had it for a whole week.
• 53:51
  Had it for a whole week if people held me to turning things
• 53:58
  around. Always in a week.
• 54:02
  Well, you're not the ambassador of.
• 54:04
  And I'm not. And that's exactly right, my I
• 54:06
  am not that important. So thank fuck for that.
• 54:09
  Me, you are. You're my ambassador.
• 54:12
  To Frank, you so much. You're welcome.
• 54:14
  And back at you. Thank you.
• 54:16
  So they're like, yeah, now we know a whole bunch about water
• 54:21
  and we know that Grandpa is trying to, he's trying to seal
• 54:26
  the deal, make sure this water treaty gets signed past clean
• 54:31
  water. Clean water.
• 54:32
  Yeah. And they're referencing, they're
• 54:35
  referencing the aqueducts, they're referencing Napoleon,
• 54:38
  They're referencing the original sewer systems.
• 54:41
  They're saying this, this the part of our.
• 54:44
  Blood. Sure.
• 54:46
  That, yeah, that runs as thick as water, as water.
• 54:50
  That's what I would say if I were them, if I were a 12 year
• 54:52
  old writing a, you know, writing a script.
• 54:55
  You sound like them you're channeling.
• 54:57
  Thank you. And I am today.
• 55:00
  And they are like, hey, look, Bozo Prime, Mr. Prime Minister
• 55:07
  or whatever, we need to get the mercury out of the water.
• 55:12
  Sure. OK.
• 55:12
  Yeah, this look at this fucking shit.
• 55:14
  And they, they point to the water.
• 55:15
  Uh huh. It's disgusting.
• 55:16
  Well, they hand this is the thing that they give the Prime
• 55:18
  Minister the bad water to drink. Yeah, it's Brown.
• 55:22
  It's disgusting, yes. Was it actually OK?
• 55:26
  And he goes, What is the meaning of this?
• 55:28
  What is the meaning of this? He literally does say that.
• 55:33
  I just don't mean. And then the girls are like,
• 55:35
  that was us. That was us.
• 55:38
  Uh huh. They say bottled water.
• 55:40
  What happened to us? Yeah, we used to live in a
• 55:44
  society. Yeah, they're like I.
• 55:47
  Mean Is water in France really that bad?
• 55:50
  I I mean, I think they use bottled water because of the
• 55:53
  pipes, because they have old pipes, because old and old.
• 55:56
  Yeah, girl, I live in the Highlands.
• 55:58
  I have to filter my water. I get it.
• 56:02
  They said the pipes are too old. We don't want to replace them
• 56:04
  yet. Yeah.
• 56:05
  Denver. Denver.
• 56:07
  What is it? City.
• 56:08
  City and County of Denver. Water.
• 56:11
  Yeah, they said here's a Brita filter.
• 56:12
  Which anyone? In France, ever heard of a
• 56:15
  Brita? Wasn't invented yet.
• 56:19
  Yeah, they don't. They don't.
• 56:20
  You guys don't know about Brita filters?
• 56:21
  Yeah, I don't think they filtered water, but this movie
• 56:26
  is so. Old.
• 56:27
  Yeah, they're not doing that. Yeah.
• 56:29
  And then they do a whole case, yeah.
• 56:33
  As you say, you've seen legal shows make your closing
• 56:36
  argument. They do say that.
• 56:38
  And they do make a closing argument.
• 56:41
  Yeah, I don't remember what they said.
• 56:42
  They're like, it's totally not cool.
• 56:45
  Yeah, they have dirty water. They're like, this is like being
• 56:49
  clean water is so French. Yeah.
• 56:53
  Where did we lose our identity? Yeah, yeah.
• 56:57
  And he's like you Are you better than your grandpa, don't you?
• 57:00
  Yes, and then the grandpa's like.
• 57:01
  What the fuck? Yeah, yeah.
• 57:03
  And then he's he's just just like, this is the this night I
• 57:06
  have had. I keep.
• 57:07
  Doing this and thank you for. This I like.
• 57:11
  It. I have had in a what?
• 57:14
  Since my wife died, did his wife die?
• 57:18
  The grandpa. Or the grand.
• 57:20
  Sister. And then they.
• 57:23
  Said We'll kill your wife if you don't do this.
• 57:26
  Did an athlete or the. Knife like yeah, they've got
• 57:29
  they've got her in a chokehold. Yeah, no, the the grandpa cuz
• 57:34
  remember he was like waited yeah cuz he's like back in World War
• 57:37
  2. That's where they met.
• 57:40
  That's where they met. Oh, they had.
• 57:42
  OK, so this is generational. These these really like
• 57:46
  whimsical encounters. Yeah.
• 57:48
  You could say, well, I don't know, actually, maybe it's a
• 57:50
  stretch for me to say that a soldier meeting a nurse in World
• 57:53
  War 2 is whimsical, but. I think our generation thinks
• 57:58
  it's very. Whimsical.
• 57:59
  Yeah, definitely. I mean, they were in France.
• 58:01
  Yeah. That's so he survived,
• 58:03
  obviously. I mean, she didn't.
• 58:05
  But yeah, she and then he goes. Yeah, he goes.
• 58:08
  We had 45 years to go. I'm making really.
• 58:11
  Asian, yeah. And they're like, wow, you never
• 58:16
  tell us that story, grandpa. Yeah.
• 58:19
  And he's like, yeah, I guess we should really talk more.
• 58:22
  Yeah. I do think if Mary Kate and
• 58:24
  Ashley would have had phones, if they would have had cell phones,
• 58:27
  they would have bullied people on Snapchat.
• 58:30
  They would have been cyber bull, their grandpa would have tried
• 58:34
  to FaceTime them and they would have said fuck you grandpa.
• 58:37
  But enclosed they would have been snapping the whole trap.
• 58:40
  Of course they would have been. I mean they would have probably
• 58:43
  created a finsta about Jeremy. Absolutely.
• 58:50
  They. Yeah, currently recording him
• 58:52
  with the supermodel and like, you know.
• 58:55
  Sending it to TMZ, that's what they would have done.
• 58:58
  They. Would have done that.
• 58:58
  Thank God they didn't have that for me.
• 59:00
  God, seriously, they couldn't say TMZ wire us the money.
• 59:05
  Money. Instead, they just saved
• 59:07
  France's water. Yeah, yeah, did, they did.
• 59:10
  And then they. Was like now I know you 2 ladies
• 59:13
  have a dance to get. Why don't you go to the dance?
• 59:16
  And they're like, Oh, my God, this is the best day of our
• 59:19
  lives. So they go to the dance.
• 59:21
  And you know what? There is a moment in this dance.
• 59:25
  Yeah. In in in the film Capital F Film
• 59:28
  the film Passport to Paris. The film Passport to Paris,
• 59:31
  directed by. Directed by Kids Directed So
• 59:38
  what, Mary Kate or Ashley? Sorry, you don't remember which
• 59:41
  one is dancing with her boy and he they're talking about how
• 59:46
  they're going to e-mail all the time.
• 59:48
  Your guy? Yeah, this is your.
• 59:49
  This is yeah, this is my guy. And he says I'll miss you, funny
• 59:53
  girl. And he gives her a kiss.
• 59:58
  And don't, don't we all ladies, am I right?
• 1:00:04
  Yeah, I'll miss you, funny girl. Man.
• 1:00:09
  I mean. I'm saying these 12 year olds in
• 1:00:11
  this movie. They got.
• 1:00:12
  Really. Cause anyone said to me I'll
• 1:00:16
  miss you funny girl and giving me a kiss.
• 1:00:19
  That's that's a great line. That is so that's that's
• 1:00:24
  everything. Bogart level.
• 1:00:26
  That's Casablanc. Yeah, That's, that's we'll
• 1:00:30
  always, literally, we'll always have Paris.
• 1:00:32
  Yeah, they were talking about this.
• 1:00:34
  They were talking. They were talking about support
• 1:00:36
  to parents, absolutely. This movie.
• 1:00:39
  Always. Corrected by Greta Gerwig.
• 1:00:46
  This. Movie.
• 1:00:47
  Oh man, I'll miss you, Funny girl.
• 1:00:48
  It's a hell. Yeah, I know.
• 1:00:50
  And he barely speaks English. Yeah, Remember, Remember that,
• 1:00:54
  boys. Remember that OK 12 year old?
• 1:00:57
  Kid. Doesn't speak a fucking word of
• 1:01:01
  English. Speak of English and he's making
• 1:01:04
  us be like. Wow, be like.
• 1:01:05
  Wow. Maybe.
• 1:01:07
  Maybe love is real. Yeah, I can't wait to have a
• 1:01:09
  slowdown. And I can't wait to have a
• 1:01:12
  slowdown. I know I miss you, funny girl, I
• 1:01:14
  miss. Oh damn, we should get that
• 1:01:16
  tattooed. Oh my God, miss you funny girl.
• 1:01:18
  I miss you funny girl. Also, he did think she was funny
• 1:01:21
  because he couldn't understand anything.
• 1:01:22
  Yeah, he was like, what are you talking about the base of?
• 1:01:25
  Their connection. And because she's like a kooky
• 1:01:29
  American girl, you know, when they're like doing the
• 1:01:31
  impression, doing some impression work of like French
• 1:01:35
  girls versus American girls, the French girls, like they'd walk
• 1:01:38
  around with their nose up. And then the American girls are
• 1:01:40
  like. Wish to be fair, we're not
• 1:01:43
  breaking that. Very.
• 1:01:46
  If there were two cool French women, yeah, doing this podcast,
• 1:01:51
  they would not. They would be wearing those
• 1:01:53
  sunglasses. They tell you that bitch.
• 1:01:55
  They. Would not be.
• 1:01:58
  Yeah, I. Literally like impression work.
• 1:02:01
  Meanwhile, I'm like and then they go.
• 1:02:06
  Oh no. No.
• 1:02:07
  Yeah, they, and you know, what I also like about it is they these
• 1:02:10
  girls don't act like, I mean, they have this really beautiful
• 1:02:13
  night. They have these kisses.
• 1:02:14
  Yeah. They don't act like they're ever
• 1:02:17
  going to see these boys again. Like one of the boys is like, I
• 1:02:20
  do not know when I will see you again.
• 1:02:22
  And she's like, you won't. Yeah.
• 1:02:24
  He's like, maybe if you go on tour.
• 1:02:25
  Yeah, like she's like, Oh yeah. If you're, if you're banned,
• 1:02:28
  what did we say? It was called Video Heads.
• 1:02:30
  If Video Heads goes on tour, let me know.
• 1:02:33
  That's like, OK, That's like when you, you know, you sort of
• 1:02:36
  have a chance encounter with someone and then you say, yeah,
• 1:02:38
  if you're ever coming through Denver, let me know.
• 1:02:40
  Let me know. Okay, yeah, right.
• 1:02:42
  These girls don't give a fuck. Yeah, they go back home to those
• 1:02:46
  other boys and they say they they absolutely dunk on them,
• 1:02:51
  calling them by the wrong name. Slam them.
• 1:02:54
  Oh my God. The boys were nice.
• 1:02:56
  They're like, hey, do you want to get Froyo?
• 1:02:57
  Or yeah, and they're like you would not believe.
• 1:03:02
  What? We have seen.
• 1:03:04
  The week we. Had.
• 1:03:06
  You will not believe what this taste of power has.
• 1:03:08
  Done American Slime on the bottom of my shoe.
• 1:03:13
  I bet you don't even know how to look at and appreciate art.
• 1:03:16
  Where's your Vespa? What?
• 1:03:18
  Kind of. How much mercury is in your
• 1:03:20
  water are you, little bitch? David, Derek.
• 1:03:24
  These boys were like Oh my God. Anyway, kind of liked it.
• 1:03:29
  I just. Like it's so they truly, I mean,
• 1:03:31
  they just don't care. They they none of the Mary Kate
• 1:03:35
  and Ashley movies do this weird thing that later movies I feel
• 1:03:39
  like do do where they're like, we're going to be together
• 1:03:41
  forever. Like teen thing in movies that I
• 1:03:43
  feel like happens like five years later where they're just
• 1:03:45
  like, you know, I love like Disney movies.
• 1:03:49
  I think you got a lot the American analogy movies are
• 1:03:51
  like. And that was a great yeah weeks.
• 1:03:53
  They say thank you for your service, thank you for your
• 1:03:56
  dismissed. Thank you for enriching my life.
• 1:03:58
  Yes, for a week. They say they say that thing,
• 1:04:02
  they say that thing that like any like any man who's like
• 1:04:08
  pretending to be emotionally evolved but is actually like
• 1:04:11
  just as you know, like emotionally UN evolved.
• 1:04:16
  Sure, as the rest of them when they say it was really special
• 1:04:21
  spending time with. You Oh my God, stop.
• 1:04:23
  Yes, yes. It's like it.
• 1:04:24
  That is the exact energy. It's like having one I stand
• 1:04:28
  with someone and then being like, I that was so much fun.
• 1:04:29
  And they're like, yeah, that was a that was a really great time.
• 1:04:32
  OK. Are they safe?
• 1:04:34
  I'll always remember. You always remember?
• 1:04:36
  Yes. It's like, why don't you
• 1:04:38
  remember to text me back? Yeah, we still I, I.
• 1:04:41
  I'll never forget this was really special.
• 1:04:44
  Yeah, this was. Really.
• 1:04:45
  Well, you could just, I mean, you could.
• 1:04:47
  I you know what would call me back?
• 1:04:48
  Going back to the US, My schedule's crazy.
• 1:04:52
  Yeah, let's you're coming through Denver.
• 1:04:54
  Let me know. Shoot me in DM yeah.
• 1:04:58
  Literally. That's literally that they give.
• 1:05:00
  Shoot me with Adm slide on in if you're in LA, yeah, otherwise.
• 1:05:05
  Otherwise, take care of yourself.
• 1:05:07
  I'm out. They're always saying.
• 1:05:09
  They're always saying, all right, take care of yourself.
• 1:05:11
  Take care of yourself, Gerber. They said good luck, Gerber.
• 1:05:16
  That's their that's their energy.
• 1:05:17
  And you know what? That's the energy they've given
• 1:05:19
  to the world sense. Yeah, the energy that they give
• 1:05:23
  to the world is you're welcome. You're.
• 1:05:25
  Welcome. We're fucking done.
• 1:05:26
  Yeah. I'm gonna do whatever I want to
• 1:05:28
  do. Yeah.
• 1:05:28
  And I don't know you shit. And you know what?
• 1:05:30
  I think that this movie really did plant a seed for Mary Kate
• 1:05:34
  because she did end up marrying that French guy.
• 1:05:36
  Super old one where they had cigarettes at their wedding.
• 1:05:39
  Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was maybe that was.
• 1:05:43
  That was one of these. Things So is the whole time.
• 1:05:44
  Yeah, I just told a wedding plan.
• 1:05:46
  Yeah, exactly. Let me.
• 1:05:47
  Ask you this really fast. OK, I feel like one of them was
• 1:05:50
  a significantly better actress than the other one.
• 1:05:52
  No. Did you?
• 1:05:53
  Yes. Which one?
• 1:05:54
  I don't know. Well, good 'cause we don't want
• 1:05:59
  them writing. In I couldn't nail it down,
• 1:06:01
  Yeah. 'Cause they had these beautiful.
• 1:06:03
  Bags these beautiful this this. Pink, blue.
• 1:06:05
  I was like almost gonna look them up.
• 1:06:07
  They had these very cool bags. So I assumed that the blue bag
• 1:06:10
  was Mary Kate. The pink bag was actually, I was
• 1:06:12
  trying to gauge. I felt like one of them was a
• 1:06:14
  much better actress. I don't know which one, and I'll
• 1:06:17
  never know. And we'll never.
• 1:06:18
  Know and it doesn't. Matter we ever know.
• 1:06:21
  There's no way to know. I like, you're like, no, they're
• 1:06:24
  fundamentally the exact same. Yeah.
• 1:06:25
  Do you think they ever got bored and then like switched parts?
• 1:06:28
  Of course. Of course, twin whimsy.
• 1:06:32
  Oh my God the the stunts that I would pull this if I had an
• 1:06:37
  identical twin. We could be twins.
• 1:06:40
  Oh my God, sounds great, Yeah. We're all in.
• 1:06:43
  I'm all in. Let's play some high jinks and
• 1:06:46
  pranks and next. Step the Pope.
• 1:06:52
  The conflict. Out to the Vatican.
• 1:06:55
  Our. Twin high jinks, we found that.
• 1:07:00
  Vaping in the Vatican as. Dot girl say this to me.
• 1:07:04
  I want to do it. So bad.
• 1:07:07
  That sounds so fucking. Cool.
• 1:07:09
  Oh, I know. Vaping with my big hat on.
• 1:07:13
  You know those big old hats just.
• 1:07:14
  Like on the toilet, Yeah. Nervous about the conclave?
• 1:07:18
  My phone snuck my phone into the conclave.
• 1:07:21
  Dude instead of white smoke it's just vape dude.
• 1:07:27
  It's just, and that's how you know that the twins have been
• 1:07:30
  selected. Selected is it's Miami Mint.
• 1:07:33
  Yeah, Ashley, we have opportunities.
• 1:07:40
  Available for you have. If you need work, we've got.
• 1:07:44
  We've got. We've got ideas.
• 1:07:46
  Get ready to bankroll some really powerful stuff, OK?
• 1:07:55
  Is there anything else related to the movie that we need to
• 1:07:57
  discuss, or really anything at all that we still need to
• 1:08:01
  discuss 'cause I do have one more question for you, but.
• 1:08:03
  I know of course, I just. Of course you do and.
• 1:08:07
  Either, I mean, there's just a lot, I think.
• 1:08:09
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know it's a beautiful film.
• 1:08:12
  Again, it's a beautiful film, Yeah.
• 1:08:14
  They had an empire before this was kind of their coming of age.
• 1:08:17
  I think this was the first. Like, boy, boy.
• 1:08:22
  Yeah. You know, parents don't matter.
• 1:08:25
  I'm. Pretty sure in Billboard Dad
• 1:08:26
  they didn't have boys did they? I think it was just the dad was
• 1:08:30
  kind of the the main boy of the. Show and wasn't there one with
• 1:08:33
  Christie Alley? Yeah, but that was not a part of
• 1:08:39
  like this cinematic year, so I'm pretty sure wasn't.
• 1:08:43
  There one where they were orphans.
• 1:08:45
  Oh yeah? Yeah.
• 1:08:47
  Fuck. They've lived a lot of life.
• 1:08:49
  They've lived a lot of life. Yeah, you know, right.
• 1:08:52
  See what I mean? It's hard to keep track of all
• 1:08:53
  the multiverses. It's the multiverse, and this
• 1:08:56
  multiverse, they're doing the best, I think, if any of them,
• 1:09:00
  so too. Yeah, I just loved it.
• 1:09:02
  I5 out of 5I. Yeah, absolutely.
• 1:09:05
  I. Think.
• 1:09:06
  Truly no notes. This movie is perfect.
• 1:09:08
  This movie, this is and it's it's an hour and a half.
• 1:09:13
  Easy peasy. You know what Martin Scorsese
• 1:09:15
  even. Well, I have here you can tell a
• 1:09:19
  story. In an hour and a half.
• 1:09:20
  Yeah, we all we have 3 and. 1/2 hours come on to talk about
• 1:09:24
  womanhood to talk about. A journey.
• 1:09:27
  You know what I learned about womanhood?
• 1:09:28
  Everything I needed to know. Everything.
• 1:09:30
  This. Movie.
• 1:09:31
  Used to know to be unapologetically terrible.
• 1:09:33
  Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.
• 1:09:35
  That's to have an encounter with someone and say.
• 1:09:39
  I'll never forget you. Yeah.
• 1:09:40
  Got a ride home? Gotta go if you're ever in
• 1:09:42
  Denver. If you're.
• 1:09:43
  Ever hit me up or not or not fucking doors.
• 1:09:47
  I don't care. Don't phone.
• 1:09:50
  Care. Yeah.
• 1:09:51
  So that's that's. I it was fantastic.
• 1:09:54
  It was, I actually think at age I was actually surprised by how
• 1:09:57
  much I enjoyed watching it. Oh yeah.
• 1:10:00
  Is that is that I just I knew I would like it, but I I was yeah,
• 1:10:03
  the whole. I yeah, I had a blast watching.
• 1:10:06
  It and the fashion I will say this, I actually like really
• 1:10:10
  enjoyed me too. Like concerningly, I was like, I
• 1:10:13
  would wear that. Yeah, you were looking things
• 1:10:15
  up. I I found that they did like a
• 1:10:18
  really good job of playing up the twin stuff without having
• 1:10:22
  them wear literally the exact same thing.
• 1:10:24
  You know, like it was. It was very the the yin and Yang
• 1:10:29
  of it all. You know.
• 1:10:31
  They really balance each other out.
• 1:10:33
  The color theory don't even get me started this.
• 1:10:36
  Movie is an exploration in color.
• 1:10:38
  Theory. And they did it in 90 minutes.
• 1:10:39
  And they did it in 90 minutes. Martin.
• 1:10:42
  Yeah. Martin, listen up.
• 1:10:45
  Martin. Yeah.
• 1:10:47
  I just think it was meaningful and I liked it.
• 1:10:49
  And it's beautiful sounds. Beautiful.
• 1:10:51
  No notes. No notes.
• 1:10:53
  Great. Perfect.
• 1:10:54
  Perfect. I have a question for you.
• 1:10:56
  This is our final segment of the show.
• 1:10:58
  OK, OK, so. You want me to do in my accent
• 1:11:02
  again? And that's my question.
• 1:11:04
  Just could you do the attitude? Away.
• 1:11:10
  That is, I'm telling you, as good as anyone does it in the
• 1:11:13
  movie that is not in. Characters that are supposed to
• 1:11:16
  be friends, they are. Like, oh, what are you Gilly is
• 1:11:19
  doing this hamburger? What is this hamburger I am?
• 1:11:24
  Killing it, yeah. You are.
• 1:11:25
  You are. No.
• 1:11:26
  Thank you. Yeah.
• 1:11:27
  And if they need to reboot it, we've got we've got someone
• 1:11:32
  available. I'm stopping.
• 1:11:39
  I'm sobbing. Don't stop.
• 1:11:41
  Yes, yes, you're the final segment.
• 1:11:43
  My final segment, our final segment, our final segment,
• 1:11:47
  cancel or call back is a game where listeners send us trends
• 1:11:51
  from the past. You know, I have to discuss this
• 1:11:53
  trend should be cancelled forever or if it needs to be
• 1:11:55
  called back. OK, so this actually was not
• 1:11:58
  sent in by a listener. This came from real life
• 1:12:02
  inspiration. I was at Cheeseman Park last
• 1:12:03
  weekend and I saw someone flying a kite and I thought when was
• 1:12:07
  the last time I saw that? And then I thought when was the
• 1:12:12
  last time I heard someone say the phrase go fly a kite?
• 1:12:17
  And I really need to know, do you think that we need to bring
• 1:12:21
  back the phrase go fly a kite? I don't think I've ever.
• 1:12:26
  Heard Are you crazy? I think you're acting like this
• 1:12:30
  is. A phrase.
• 1:12:31
  This is not like acting like this is a phrase.
• 1:12:35
  There's a song that's. Like, let's go fly a kite, yeah,
• 1:12:38
  To the highest heights. I think that it's like, OK,
• 1:12:41
  listen, I think that it's one of those phrases that developed as
• 1:12:44
  like a skirt around when you're about to, like when you're about
• 1:12:48
  to swear in front of a kid, when you're like, go fuck yourself,
• 1:12:51
  but it's like, go fly a kite. This.
• 1:12:53
  Is not. I don't think this is a thing.
• 1:12:56
  I've never heard of it. I.
• 1:12:59
  You don't have to cancel something that never came next.
• 1:13:03
  Don't make me use the G word. What's the G word?
• 1:13:09
  Don't make me say. It well, you're getting crazy.
• 1:13:11
  Oh my God, girl, you're that never happened.
• 1:13:15
  Are you getting enough sleep? Maybe everybody's talking about
• 1:13:20
  it. You're not sleeping.
• 1:13:21
  Great, okay. You're not sleeping, baby.
• 1:13:23
  Yeah. Baby, you're not sleeping.
• 1:13:25
  Go fly a kite. No, you didn't see a flight.
• 1:13:28
  You didn't see a kite at a. Cheese today.
• 1:13:31
  Have you been? Have you been to Cheese?
• 1:13:33
  We didn't. Go there.
• 1:13:35
  No, we didn't go there. So you.
• 1:13:36
  Oh my God. No, I don't come with me.
• 1:13:40
  I kind of, I don't. I want to ask them, but I don't
• 1:13:42
  know. I've never heard of it.
• 1:13:43
  So I don't think this is real and.
• 1:13:46
  Where did you grow up? I right here D Town.
• 1:13:48
  OK, that's what I thought. Yeah, I grew up here, you
• 1:13:50
  fucking liar. I think that my family just
• 1:13:52
  cursed in front. Of each other.
• 1:13:54
  From a young age, I think I was the baby, so they didn't even
• 1:13:56
  bother. Maybe that's what it was.
• 1:13:58
  Maybe that is what it is. Can I try it out and say
• 1:14:01
  something to be my guest? Go fly a kite.
• 1:14:05
  How did you like it I? Felt pretty good.
• 1:14:07
  Yeah, it does feel pretty good, doesn't?
• 1:14:09
  It. Yeah, we can bring it back.
• 1:14:15
  I I'm getting like I'm getting overheated here feeling.
• 1:14:21
  So. Angry.
• 1:14:23
  It's like that. I.
• 1:14:27
  Have. Never heard that before.
• 1:14:29
  It's not. I've never heard it.
• 1:14:31
  I've never heard it. I don't know what to tell you.
• 1:14:34
  I. Could.
• 1:14:36
  Tell me you were lying to me this whole time and you have
• 1:14:38
  heard it. Fly.
• 1:14:39
  I've heard like let's go fly it. You've heard of Kite?
• 1:14:44
  I've heard of the. Concept of.
• 1:14:46
  Kite. I understand the concept.
• 1:14:48
  I'm going to fly it. Maybe it's 'cause I didn't grow
• 1:14:51
  up near a beach. I grew up here too.
• 1:14:55
  I don't. Know.
• 1:14:56
  What part of the thing you grew up in?
• 1:14:58
  I grew up in Fort Collins. Oh, maybe it was a Fort Collins
• 1:15:00
  thing. It's.
• 1:15:02
  A Northern Colorado. For a regional.
• 1:15:03
  Thing no. Co Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:15:06
  That's it. You're on the you're on the D
• 1:15:09
  town, the east side. I'm so sorry we're built
• 1:15:12
  different. Yeah, we're built a little
• 1:15:13
  different. OK, there's, I'm thinking of
• 1:15:15
  specifically there is a movie, there's a movie where someone
• 1:15:19
  says it and it's like running in my head.
• 1:15:23
  Sure. Sure, honey.
• 1:15:26
  Absolutely, Absolutely. You know what you send me?
• 1:15:29
  You send me it when you're. I believe.
• 1:15:30
  I believe you. I do believe you, girl.
• 1:15:33
  I believe. You believe women?
• 1:15:35
  I believe. I don't know about that.
• 1:15:37
  Yeah. OK, cancel the.
• 1:15:44
  Women. Just get rid of women.
• 1:15:48
  Yeah, easy. After our whole thing about.
• 1:15:53
  What the fountain? Is Mary Kate and.
• 1:15:55
  Ashley, Mary Kate and Ashley, they just proved to us.
• 1:15:58
  Yeah, girls. Girls.
• 1:15:59
  They care about boys. That's it.
• 1:16:02
  Yeah, all they care about is boys and boys fashion.
• 1:16:05
  Listen, listener, thank you so much for being on this journey
• 1:16:09
  with us. I hope that you go have some
• 1:16:12
  whimsy. Yeah.
• 1:16:14
  Go circle someone with your Vespa.
• 1:16:17
  Thank you. With your best, bud.
• 1:16:19
  Go. Just go find someone and.
• 1:16:22
  And fucking vulture your way around them.
• 1:16:25
  Oh, man, please don't do that. But you know what?
• 1:16:28
  Go ahead and study abroad. Find someone to love for five
• 1:16:34
  years. Yeah.
• 1:16:37
  Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:16:38
  And then now you still talk every once in a well.
• 1:16:41
  So. Often you think of him whenever
• 1:16:44
  you use the Britta filter. You know.
• 1:16:46
  You're going to feel it. Yeah.
• 1:16:47
  And know what? Go fly a kite.
• 1:16:53
  Nothing more whimsical than flying a kite.
• 1:16:58
  All right, let's get out of here.
• 1:16:59
  Let's get out of here. Bye bye.