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Barra Bits - Sandpaper In His Pants · Lisa & Russell

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: Welcome back, Barra.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Good morning.
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Yes, welcome to cricket season. Footy season is officially over,
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: though it never really ends. They've got trade periods and
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: drafts and all that.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: It's all in the news.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: But the cricket, well, it starts tonight, the first test
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: between Australia and South Africa at Durban, 3.30pm today on telly.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: Barra with his best Yarpie accent there. South Africa.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: South Africa. South Africa. It's our first test series since
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: 2018 against them, of course, in South Africa. Obviously, eight
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: years since Sam Papergate. So, first time back there. And
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: guess who's written a book?
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: Of course. Timing is everything.
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: Usman Khawaja has written a book. And guess when he's
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: launching it?
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: Right now.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: At the pivotal test match in Cape Town, which is
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: the eight-year anniversary of Sandpaper Gate. And guess which big
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: chapter is that he's selling it all on?
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: Tell us.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: On Sandpaper Gate, he's going to pull back the veil
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: or open the door or the window or something on
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: what actually happened. He's even rung Pat Cummins, the Australian captain.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: Unzip the pants.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: Well, that's where it was. Well, there was no zip.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: It's a little tie-up. Pulled down the undies. Yeah, because
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: he was hiding it in his undies, wasn't he?
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: Allegedly. I think outside the undies, not inside the undies.
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: Or not beneath the box.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I wonder if it was inside the undies. I
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: think it would have to be because it would fall
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: down your leg otherwise.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: I don't think that was the B-A-double-L he was intending
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: to scratch.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: The media. And he did scratch it. And the media
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: was so on it, and they just were zooming in
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: because they thought it was going to be Warner. I
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: will never get my head around how stupid they were
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: to think that they were going to get away with that. Well,
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: they thought they were half clever because Warner was the man, right? Yes.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: But then they gave it to the kid, Bancroft. And
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: they thought, oh, they won't film Bancroft, but they must
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: have worked it out. So anyway, it's going to be
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: interesting to see what Usman says in the book. I
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: have a feeling he's going to say, look, of course
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: the bowl is new. Because they pick up the ball
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: and they go, whoa, look at these scratches. You know
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: what I mean? So how deep did it go?
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: It's not just the pitch scratching that ball.
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: The name of his autobiography is Sabre, which is Arabic
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: for patience.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: Because obviously he's got the background.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: And so we're all impatient to find out what he
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: has to say. Footy, I feel a bit for Freya.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: This is quite remarkable. Hawthorne have added... Zach Merritt and
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: Ben King.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: To their list. Yeah.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: So two absolute stars. So Hawthorne are going to get stronger, right? Mm-hmm.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: Geelong have brought in Toby Green, Jordan Ridley, and Rowan Marshall,
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: the big ruckman. So they're going to get stronger. The
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: Bulldogs are going to get their generational talent back, Sam Darcy,
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: and also look like getting Zach Butters.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: Who's the one that everybody was wanted. That everybody's after.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Should happen today. Yeah. So Frio, their list isn't...
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: They haven't got a bad list. They've got a really
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: good list, but so do those three clubs now.
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: And they're losing Sam Switzkowski.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Switter's going. And they've lost Nathan O'Driscoll. So we'll
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: see what happens. The Pullman 5 at the Sydney Swans
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: is about to become the Pullman 4 at the Swans
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: because Nick Blakey wants out. He's got a contract.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: We said, I've had enough of this. His contract's worth
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: a fortune.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and they've offered him... And he's... His dad played
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: for North Melbourne. He's a legend, right, at North Melbourne.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: They've offered him $ 11 million over eight years. So he
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: wants to go there. I have a feeling he'll get there.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: And he'll be coached by the best bloke going around,
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: Jamie Graham.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: He's just walked in through the doors the last couple
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: of days.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: Could be a remarkable story. And finally, just in this break,
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: the Bathurst. And he has a very different moral story too,
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: that guy that's just gone over there. Yeah, that's right.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: Poles apart, the two newbies. Well, you could say that
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: he got thrown under the bus, Nick Blakey. You could say.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: You could say.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: We'll just see what.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Happens later on.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: Allegedly. Allegedly.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: And Bathurst. Bathurst is on this weekend, obviously Sunday. When
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: I was growing up, and probably maybe you guys, it
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: was called the Hardy-Ferodo.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: The Hardy-Ferodo.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: The Hardy-Ferodo. 1,000.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: At first, it was the Hardy-Ferodo 500. 500. No matter
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: how long you did that. And then they filled it
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: across to 1,000.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: So it's called the Great Race at Bathurst, obviously. And
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: a West Australian is the new Brockie. Well, he's maybe
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: Timu Brockie, I suppose, a little bit. But he might
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: go better.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: There's only one Brockie.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I know. So Brodie Kostecki. He's tied with Moffat
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: and Brockie for three consecutive Bathurst pole positions. So if
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: he gets it today or tomorrow in qualifying, then he'll
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: break their record there. And can he win again? He's
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: worth about five mil. He started at Wanneroo Raceway on
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: go-karts like Ricardo did.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, right.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: Just kicked on, yeah. So he's an absolute star. So
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: I guess we're rooting for Brodie Kostecki in that spot.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: Well, I'll be barracking for him. I don't know about
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: the rest.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: He's the West Australian. Now, what about this? This is brilliant.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: So there's a new Australian Open tennis boss, right? His
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: name's Andrew Abdo. Yeah. And he's come from rugby league, right?
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: And so everyone thinks, hey, no, it's nothing about tennis. Anyway,
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: in his first big speech, he refers to world number
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: one Yannick Sinner as world number one Jacob Sinner. Oh. Anyway. Yes.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: And Yannick's won like two Australian Opens. He's won the-
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: Honest mistake. It's like getting Brownlow medalist- She's called Jay Sinner.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: Jay Sinner.
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: And the winner of the Brownlow Medal, Nathan Dacos. It's
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: sort of like that, you know what I mean? But
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: it just threw me back to that famous time. I
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: love Sandy Roberts. The biggest, funniest sporting gaffe of all time.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: He's at the races. He's introducing Miss Australia, whose name
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: is Leanne Dick. Anyway, that's how he went.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: And, in fact, we still have Miss Australia with us
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: in Leanne Cock.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: Leanne Dick, I should say.
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: Leanne, it's going to be very interesting. And at that
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: very moment, the blood just drained from his body. He
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: went cold.
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: It was the self-correction. Would you have corrected or would
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: you have just gone? He probably should have rolled with it,
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: drawing attention to the fact that I said that instead
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: of that.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: Oh, God.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: One of the all-time great blues. It's been seen about
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: one billion times, too. So anyway, Google it if you
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: want to see. Now people will Google it a million
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: times today. Have another look. Manchester City, now this is amazing.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: They've become the Lance Armstrong of soccer. Brilliant, dominant, hugely successful,
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: and eventually in a big asterisk against everything they did,
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: take the seven Tour de France titles off him. Manchester
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: City could lose their eight Premier League titles they won
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: since 2012 because they basically busted the salary cap by
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: about a billion dollars. Oh, wow.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: So that's not just a little bit of mischief. That's
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: a lot.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: 115 breaches. 115 breaches.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: But they're also talking about dropping them down.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: Relegating them.
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: Relegating them out of the Premier League into Division 1.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: So imagine Manchester City playing in the league below. Makes
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: John Elliott look frugal. So keep an eye on that.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: And I might just do, if you don't mind, I
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: might do a little self-indulgent ad here for the Perth
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: Football Club. Come to the Perth Football Club. We're recruiting
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: a senior coach. A senior coach. Do you want to
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: be part of history? Six-figure salary, great benefits, excellent facilities,
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: good president, talented list, big supporter base. You could become
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: an immortal if we win the premiership. Probably add a
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: trophy or a statue at the club for you as well.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: Application's closed today to be senior coach. Oh, okay.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: So thank you for allowing me to do that. Just
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: contact me or the Perth Football Club.