Movie Characters We Would Noir

The Podcast Nobody Asked For · May 28, 2026 · 1h 25m

Not that anybody asked but this week we pulled down the blinds and lit a cigarette we didn't even want because we're figuring out our Top 3 Movie Characters We Would Noir. Inspired by the release of Spider-Noir, we're asking which characters deserve to be drenched in shadows, saddled with a dark past and given a voiceover nobody asked them to do. Which beloved heroes would crumble beautifully under the weight of a corrupted city? Which characters would thrive in a world where nothing is simple and everyone has an angle? And which characters would it be just plain funny to see brood? What will…