Latest / She Speaks Life - Christian Women, Strengthen Your Faith, Bible Study, Grow Spiritually In Christ / Beating Burnout God’s Way with Tara Sun
Transcript
- 0:00Hey there, welcome back to She Speaks Life.
- 0:02If you have not already caught on yet, in addition to the
- 0:05interview episodes, I'm also doing the solo episodes that I
- 0:10have called Feel Your Life, where we're diving into ways to
- 0:14fortify our faith, put into practice God's word over any
- 0:18situation we face, basically putting truth into action along
- 0:22with stocking the fire of the Holy Spirit that is in US.
- 0:27And in these teaching episodes, we personalize scripture and I
- 0:31also walk us through powerful ways that will bring us into a
- 0:35deeper relationship with Jesus and ultimately letting the Holy
- 0:39Spirit lead us with enthusiasm for everything God has planned
- 0:44for us. So if you want to follow along,
- 0:46you can jump to my website. Get your copy of the Serenity
- 0:50Journal, but it's absolutely not required to engage in these solo
- 0:54teaching episodes. Hey, I so hope you'll meet me
- 0:57there. Today I sit down with author and
- 1:01podcaster Tara Son. She has a successful podcast
- 1:05called Truth Talks with Tara and a new released book called
- 1:10Overbooked and Overwhelmed which we dive into on how to create a
- 1:15life flow that is Jesus's pace instead of the the world's pace.
- 1:21Terry gives us practical steps with a way out of spiritual
- 1:25burnout, how to say no to distracted faith, realize the
- 1:30beauty of limitations and redefines rest and shows us that
- 1:36it's not a bad word, but a wise and necessary part of a well
- 1:40lived life. With a culture that is so
- 1:44obsessed with doing more, she instead encourages us to devote
- 1:48our lives to the Most High and then watch God impact every area
- 1:53of our lives. So let go of the pressures of
- 1:56the world and live in true fulfillment in God.
- 2:00As one had said before, an overwhelmed life is an
- 2:04underwhelmed soul. I can't wait for you to hear
- 2:07this powerful conversation I have with Tara.
- 2:10So if you're ready, I'm ready. Here's my guest, Tara son.
- 2:14Hey, Tara, welcome to She Speaks Life.
- 2:16I am so excited you are here to give us this message today.
- 2:21Oh well, thank you for having me, I am so excited.
- 2:24I love the type of your show. You are such a kindred spirit
- 2:27already, I can tell. So this is gonna be great.
- 2:29Thank you. Well, you're a fellow podcast
- 2:31yourself. It's called Truth Talks with
- 2:35Tara Sun and very successful podcast.
- 2:38You've been doing it for a while and I love hearing your
- 2:41interviews and all about who you are in your message and building
- 2:46the Kingdom or just here to point people to Jesus and just
- 2:51to Foster and nourish their relationship in Him.
- 2:54And so I like interviewing with like minded friends such as
- 2:59yourself and we've got a mutual friend that we just had on each
- 3:03other's podcast. So that was fun.
- 3:06She had told me about you and then here comes your interview.
- 3:10So it was perfect. Timing.
- 3:12We're gonna be diving into your book that you just wrote, called
- 3:18Overbooked and Overwhelmed How to keep up with God when you're
- 3:21just trying to keep up with life.
- 3:23And I think we can all relate with feeling overwhelmed and
- 3:28getting those seasons of burnouts.
- 3:30And I love that you emphasize that it's more than just cutting
- 3:35back our assignments to get that rest and relief that we're all
- 3:39seeking. And so it's just a powerful
- 3:43message that we're going to be talking about.
- 3:45And before we dive in more, I would love for you to share what
- 3:49is a scripture verse that's really speaking to you right
- 3:53now. Yeah, it's, it's a great
- 3:55question and I love this. And it seems to be a huge theme
- 3:59of my life. Something that any author would
- 4:02tell you is that when they write a book, of course they learn
- 4:05something through it, but it's not that they're an expert
- 4:08necessarily. It's like, hey, I am still
- 4:10learning this message. I am still living this message.
- 4:12And so ironically, every single time I've launched a book, the
- 4:16Lord is like, hey, like I'm going to take you through a
- 4:19season or a trial where you're going to have to live this
- 4:21message out again. And so my verse really ties into
- 4:24this whole idea of feeling so overwhelmed, so overtired, so
- 4:27overbooked. And I've been meditating on
- 4:30Psalm 116, seven. And my current favorite
- 4:33translation to read out of is the New Living translation.
- 4:35So in the new Living, it says, let my soul be at rest again for
- 4:40the Lord has been good to me. And so just a reminder for me to
- 4:45be like, hey, your soul can rest because and that word for,
- 4:50because God has been good to you.
- 4:53I think so often we don't rest because we don't trust God's
- 4:55provision because we don't remember that he's good and kind
- 4:57and that he's got this. And so for me, it's a good
- 5:00reminder to be like, I can rest because God is good because he
- 5:03has a track record of goodness and faithfulness.
- 5:06So that one has been a good one lately in my life.
- 5:09That's so good. And I always say resting is
- 5:12trusting, like you were just saying, right?
- 5:15And so and he is trustworthy and he is so faithful and it's just
- 5:21in those those times that seems so counterintuitive, like I
- 5:24should be doing this and that. And and so we kind of throw away
- 5:28rest as a just, you know, something that's not helpful or
- 5:33beneficial or, you know, I don't, I shouldn't be doing
- 5:37this. I should be doing more.
- 5:39And so we're going to be diving more into that, that more isn't
- 5:43always the best. And so I love how you're going
- 5:46to give us that wisdom on what to do when we feel overwhelmed
- 5:50or like your child said, overbooked and overwhelmed,
- 5:53running into burnout and how to shift our mindset into resting
- 5:58that it is not a waste of time. So tell me your story on why
- 6:02this message overbooked and overwhelmed.
- 6:06I know each author has a story like you said of walking through
- 6:11this. Yeah.
- 6:12So really, I would have to rewind to about, let's see here.
- 6:16So my son is 3 years old. My first son is 3 years old.
- 6:18So it really kind of started around that time where having
- 6:22kids and also doing what I do in work and in ministry.
- 6:26And then not even like just social life and normal things
- 6:30like trying to keep up with the workout routine and everything
- 6:32that you have in life and try to make meals every night for your
- 6:35husband and for your family. Like life became so much more
- 6:39full. And not even necessarily with
- 6:42bad things, right? It was like a lot of good
- 6:44things, right? Like a lot of responsibilities
- 6:45that we can't let up on, right? Like taking care of our family
- 6:48or working. And so I came to this point
- 6:51where I was a new mom. I was in the throes of
- 6:53postpartum anxiety and depression.
- 6:55I felt so numb. I felt so numb to God because I
- 7:00didn't know how to handle all these things in my life and
- 7:03because there were so many things, good things and some
- 7:05distractions, right? I decided that the easiest thing
- 7:09was just kind of let off the gas and in my face and kick it into
- 7:13neutral. And as a result, like I was not
- 7:15spending time with God. I was not keeping up with God.
- 7:17I was letting every other excuse kind of push him further to the
- 7:21side. And as a result, I got very
- 7:23burnt out, not just like physically and emotionally, but
- 7:26spiritually. I'm like, I don't feel like I
- 7:28know God. I don't feel like I have time
- 7:31for him and was just not prioritizing him.
- 7:33And there's a moment in the very, very first words of the
- 7:36book where I literally say that I was scrubbing dishes at nearly
- 7:41midnight, bawling my eyes out. And it was a very eye opening
- 7:45moment where I realized like something's wrong.
- 7:48Like, if I am letting the dishes, like totally send me
- 7:53into oblivion, I told my husband that I can't not do dishes
- 7:56because everything will fall apart.
- 7:58Like, I literally uttered those words like Jamie, it was so
- 8:01telling. My husband is like, OK, there's
- 8:04something wrong, right? And I think so many of us can
- 8:06relate to that, whether it's sobbing over the kitchen sink or
- 8:10doing something else where you realize, oh, wait, this isn't
- 8:12just about dishes. This isn't just about, you know,
- 8:15maybe a certain circumstance. Like it's kind of soul deep.
- 8:18And that's really what was telling for me.
- 8:21Yeah, yeah. And it's almost like you're
- 8:23trying to control something. You know.
- 8:26And when your life feels so out of control, I mean, that's like,
- 8:30I guess the psychology I did because yeah, I've been there.
- 8:34I mean, I was doing some tearing out some rose bushes in my front
- 8:39yard and I was bundling it up and I was just having this.
- 8:44I was upset about something. And I was just taking out all my
- 8:48aggression on just taking all these bushes, these things out
- 8:52and put them in trash bags. And it was so heavy.
- 8:55And I remember just pushing the bag and my finger bent back and
- 9:00I broke it. And I just had my breakdown
- 9:04moment where I just started bawling because what in the
- 9:07world am I doing to the point where, you know, I'm taking the
- 9:11aggression out on, you know, gardening.
- 9:14And yeah, I'm like, OK, something is not right.
- 9:18I'm a totally out of alignment. And usually it's just
- 9:21circumstances that you're allowing to just make yourself
- 9:26crumble. And you're right.
- 9:28If you're not spiritually, if you're spiritually dry, if
- 9:32you're spiritually not there, then yeah, it's all over, right?
- 9:36Yeah. We're we're in shambles.
- 9:39We're in crumbling down. Right.
- 9:41Really. Really.
- 9:42Fast. So like when you when you leave
- 9:44yourself, when you don't like build upon that foundation of
- 9:47Jesus and keep him first, which is really what the whole book is
- 9:50about, you leave yourself more susceptible to more of those
- 9:54consistent breakdown moments. Like the whole message of the
- 9:57book too, is, is to tell people like, hey, it's normal to have
- 10:00seasons where you're busy. It's normal to have seasons
- 10:02where you feel like you reached the end of the day and you're
- 10:04just exhausted. You just fall and collapse.
- 10:06Like because that's just a part of life.
- 10:08That's a part of our human frailty.
- 10:10But at the heart of it is like, hey, like let's just have more
- 10:13consistent practices in our lives in the presence of Jesus
- 10:17so that when those times do come of spiritual distraction or
- 10:20exhaustion that we know how to handle a little bit better,
- 10:23right? Because I was at that point
- 10:24where I could not handle it because I was not putting Jesus
- 10:271st. And so, yeah, when everything
- 10:29came, it just felt like this insurmountable task because I
- 10:32just, I didn't have a starting place with Him, you know?
- 10:35Yeah, Yeah, I could totally relate.
- 10:38Me too. OK.
- 10:39You talk about the concept of the abundant life versus the
- 10:43over committed life. So how do you define these two
- 10:46and what steps can we take to live a more fulfilling life?
- 10:51I love this. So John 1010 is a verse, right,
- 10:54that says the abundant life. Jesus came to give us the
- 10:56abundant life. Jesus came to give us the full
- 10:58life. And I think sometimes we take
- 11:00that word full because some translations of John 1010 say I
- 11:03came to give you life and life to the full.
- 11:05And I think sometimes we can misunderstand or misinterpret
- 11:08the word full to be like fully strapped, like my calendar is
- 11:12fully booked. I have so many things.
- 11:14I'm juggling all the things. I mean, how many of us feel like
- 11:17when someone asks us how life has been or how we've been?
- 11:20We, we feel this need to respond like busy or life is full.
- 11:24Life is crazy. I'm, you know, I'm constantly on
- 11:26the go. And if we don't, we have kind of
- 11:27this feeling like, oh, if I don't respond with like I'm busy
- 11:30or life is full, then what are people going to think of me?
- 11:33Right? So I think so many of us think
- 11:35that like, in order to follow Jesus, we have to be completely
- 11:37strapped, right? Like we have to be completely
- 11:39booked every single moment. And I think that's a big
- 11:42confusion in my own life where I've been like, OK, the the life
- 11:45that Jesus came to give me, you have to absolutely maximize
- 11:48every single moment when I've actually realized the abundant
- 11:52life is following Jesus and where he wants us to go at his
- 11:55pace. There's even a chapter in the
- 11:57book where we talking about where we talk about like walking
- 11:59at Jesus's pace. So what does it look like to
- 12:02look at his life? Who arguably Jesus was the most
- 12:05like busy important person. He was the most important person
- 12:09where he had this Kingdom mission and yet he was able to
- 12:13live a full life without being so overcommitted, without being
- 12:17so like, I don't know, in this hustle culture mindset.
- 12:21So that was a huge pivotal moment for me and my faith where
- 12:25I realized the abundant life that Jesus offers doesn't
- 12:27necessarily mean full to the brim, right?
- 12:30Yeah, yeah, so good. All right.
- 12:32You did touch on social media and not making into an idol, and
- 12:39I guess let's talk about distractions because the
- 12:43distractions can get in the way of us having that meaningful
- 12:48time with the Lord. So.
- 12:50Yeah. Expand more on that.
- 12:53A huge part of this message was about distraction because over
- 12:58the last couple years, I felt like I was not in my brain, not
- 13:01only just like having kids and dealing with postpartum, but
- 13:04like there were so many things pulling my focus.
- 13:06And that's really what distraction is, right?
- 13:09Really, Our brains have been so rewired by social media, by the
- 13:13constant need and desire to be online and to be available for
- 13:17everyone. And so I started the book in the
- 13:20first couple chapters just talking about like, hey, let's
- 13:22talk about the root of the issue here is that we have become so
- 13:26distracted and we've become so to being distracted that it's
- 13:29really hard for us to pull away and to press in and lock into
- 13:34what's important, right, which is our relationship with Jesus.
- 13:37And so one of the first things I talk about is like, let's
- 13:40identify the ways in which we may be distracted, right?
- 13:43So whether it's like, how much are we spending on our screens?
- 13:45Like how much are we spending, like bingeing Netflix?
- 13:48And then how does that measure up to how we feel like we're
- 13:51spending time with the Lord, right?
- 13:53Because I, I could have told you a couple years ago, Jamie, I'm
- 13:55like, yeah, I just don't have enough time for Jesus.
- 13:57I don't have enough time to pray or, you know, to be in the word.
- 14:00And then if you look at my screen time on my phone or if
- 14:03you look at how much I would watch like a show at the end of
- 14:06the night for hours, like I'd be like, okay, that's pretty
- 14:09telling. Like I, I, I did have that time
- 14:11and yet I was just distracted and giving it to other areas.
- 14:14And this is kind of a hard thing to ask ourselves, but I think
- 14:18it's a really good starting point to be honest with where
- 14:21we're giving our time. If we're feeling like I want to
- 14:24be with God, but it's like, where are we actually giving our
- 14:26time, right? Yeah, yeah, That's so good.
- 14:28I had seen a clip on your Instagram about the ways to not
- 14:33get distracted in your quiet time.
- 14:35And one of the things she did say is put that laptop and that
- 14:38phone away. Yeah, when you've got that Bible
- 14:41open, don't be having that nearby.
- 14:43So I think that was, you know, definitely like the most simple
- 14:48thing, but the most tactical, like, oh, yeah.
- 14:52Like how many times is that thing like sitting on the
- 14:54armrest or for sure near you so. And I think just like
- 14:59repurposing the moments too, right?
- 15:01Yeah. I know you have so many
- 15:02different people in different walks of life that listen to
- 15:04this show and the fact that like, I mean, even if it's
- 15:07something simple as taking your Bible and putting it on your
- 15:09kitchen counter while you're making dinner or, you know, like
- 15:13a place that you like frequently travel throughout your day or
- 15:17listening to an audio book while you're driving to pick up your
- 15:20kids or commuting to work. Or.
- 15:21I think so often we get stuck in this mindset of like my Bible
- 15:24time has to be one hour completely uninterrupted in my
- 15:27perfect spot with my hot cup of coffee when that may be a
- 15:30reality. But for a lot of us, it's not.
- 15:33Or for some of us, we think that it has to be Spending time with
- 15:36Jesus is just that one moment of the day when we have to really
- 15:39get creative and realize that like God is present with us
- 15:42every single moment. So how are we going to repurpose
- 15:45those things to actively be with him?
- 15:47And it's really changed my life, especially as a mom who's, you
- 15:51know, on the go with two boys pretty often.
- 15:53It's like, hey, I don't have to miss this moment.
- 15:55And I can actually invite my kids in too, to those moments.
- 15:58Sure. That's so good.
- 16:00I was listening to a pastor and he he had reminded his the
- 16:07audience, people that were listening.
- 16:09You cannot do the call of God by your flesh.
- 16:12You know what God is calling you to is going to be all on faith
- 16:17and not by, you know, your flesh.
- 16:20And so it's like just that reminder that, you know, if we
- 16:25want to walk in this calling that God has for us, we we need
- 16:30his word. We need a relationship with him.
- 16:33And if we look at it that way, like I can't go on my daily
- 16:38without him. So it's like if I'm called to be
- 16:41a wife, if I'm called to be a mom, if I'm called to, you know,
- 16:45do this and that, then you know, I need faith.
- 16:50I need the word of God. I need him every single day.
- 16:55And we can't go by our flesh because how many of us have like
- 16:58skipped out on those times with the Lord and are like flesh
- 17:03wants to take over? I mean, I remember when I had
- 17:06littles, I was impatient. I was.
- 17:08Yeah. Short temper.
- 17:09I was like not practicing the fruit of the Spirit at all.
- 17:13Right, right, and. We're not talking like a ton of
- 17:16time, but I mean, if you take like 10 minutes or whatever it
- 17:19is and just soak yourself in God's Word, it's spiritual food.
- 17:23It's, it's the faith words that come alive in US and it takes us
- 17:27through the day. It sustains us and then we need
- 17:30it again the next day because it's Our Daily Bread.
- 17:33That's why it's called that for a reason, right?
- 17:35Absolutely, yeah. All right, you touched on.
- 17:38I laugh because the Mary and Martha story.
- 17:43Yeah. Because for so long I've heard
- 17:46this story. I mean, we all know about Mary
- 17:48and Martha, most of us. And how Mary's at the feet of
- 17:52Jesus. Martha's in the kitchen, she's
- 17:54busy fixing the food and everything.
- 17:56And for years I always have laughed because people would be
- 18:02like, oh, Martha, like, totally missed it.
- 18:05And I'm going, well, I'm a doer, so I stay late with me.
- 18:10And I'm like, Oh my gosh, why are you giving Martha a hard
- 18:13time? Who's going to eat the meal if
- 18:15there's not a meal that's already been?
- 18:17Totally prepared, so yeah. So when you said that, I was
- 18:21like, oh, this is just such a great question because it's
- 18:24like, you know, how can we be at the feet of Jesus but then be
- 18:31able to do those laundry list of things or those deadlines or
- 18:37whatever it is that give fills up our schedule.
- 18:41How can we do both? So.
- 18:43Yeah. Well, you touched on that and
- 18:45that kind of when we kind of dive into the Mary and Martha
- 18:49story is in the chapter about distraction and something like
- 18:51it's kind of the theme in that chapter is this just this phrase
- 18:54that really hit really hit me hard and it is distraction is
- 18:58not a disordered schedule. It's actually a disordered
- 19:01heart. And that's what we see in this
- 19:04story where Jesus never rebukes Martha once for, you know,
- 19:10trying to be like, hey, like I, you know, he doesn't say like,
- 19:13you shouldn't care about, you know, creating an atmosphere for
- 19:16me. You shouldn't, you know, care
- 19:17about your bread or the way your house looks or all these kind of
- 19:20things. But but I mean, he calls her to
- 19:21be like, Hey, you are anxious about many things, right?
- 19:26He knows that the reason why she's running around and anxiety
- 19:30and stress and all these things, all these things because she
- 19:32cares. OK, so I first just want to say
- 19:34like to the person listening and even to my heart is like, Hey,
- 19:38Jesus knows that a lot of the times that we went run around
- 19:42and hustle and we're distracted and we, you know, we're so
- 19:45anxious. A lot of times it's because we
- 19:46care, right? We care about taking care of the
- 19:48people in our homes. We care about doing well in our
- 19:52jobs. We care about serving him, but
- 19:55what Jesus does say is that Mary has chosen the better portion,
- 19:59right? And so he talks about here that
- 20:01really we need to address the anxiety and the stress that we
- 20:04feel and also the people pleasing, right?
- 20:07Because Martha cared more about what her house looked like and
- 20:10what the atmosphere was then she cared about Jesus.
- 20:14I mean, her action showed that like, hey, I'm running around
- 20:17trying to take care of Jesus when he's like.
- 20:19Martha, I'm right here. Like, don't miss me.
- 20:21I'm right here. And Mary didn't miss him.
- 20:24And so again, I think Martha gets a bad rap.
- 20:26But we can also learn from Martha where it's like, hey,
- 20:30Jesus honored the fact that she wanted to make the atmosphere an
- 20:34incredible place, but her stress about making things look good
- 20:38and feel good outweighed the fact that Jesus was sitting
- 20:41there. And the fact that we can miss
- 20:44moments with Jesus. We know that Jesus is always
- 20:47with us, right? He's omnipresent, He is
- 20:49omniscient, He has all these things, He's all knowing, He's
- 20:52always with us. But we can, the truth is we can
- 20:55miss those moments with him, right?
- 20:56By being too busy, by being too full.
- 20:59And so it really starts with realizing like, OK, I can care
- 21:03about, you know, the things on my calendar and hosting and, you
- 21:08know, taking care of my kids and, and, and completing those
- 21:10to do lists, but like not having that anxiety and stress about
- 21:14it, right? And so when that anxiety and
- 21:16stress does come up, grounding yourself, taking a pause, even
- 21:20if that's just like a deep breath or reciting a verse in
- 21:24your soul or saying a little whisper prayer up to Jesus and
- 21:26being like, OK, Lord, what matters?
- 21:29Even just referencing that story and saying, okay, what is that
- 21:33better portion? Jesus?
- 21:35Like Jesus tells Martha, Mary has chosen the better portion.
- 21:38It will not be taken away from her.
- 21:40And I'm also reminded that, you know, as important as, you know,
- 21:43getting your laundry done and doing these tasks, what Mary
- 21:46chose was eternal. And so when it comes down to it,
- 21:49like, are we treasuring the eternal right, which is those
- 21:51moments with Jesus, that grounding with Jesus?
- 21:54Or are we choosing the temporary, like that anxiety and
- 21:56stress that is not eternal and is not going to add value to our
- 22:00lives? I think understanding that
- 22:02dichotomy changed my perspective on that story.
- 22:05So good. Yes, I know we can learn a lot
- 22:09from that small story. Yes, it's so rich.
- 22:13OK, you had talked about having community and accountability.
- 22:16Accountability to take that role of being less overwhelmed.
- 22:22So yeah. So how does that make us feel
- 22:25less overwhelmed and not burned out just by community?
- 22:30Absolutely. So I mean community and
- 22:32accountability are they can be seen sometimes as like buzzwords
- 22:36in the faith, right? Because everyone's like, oh, you
- 22:37know, just like seek accountability or seek
- 22:39community. But what is huge and like
- 22:42undeniable and we cannot skip past in this conversation is
- 22:46that when we are overwhelmed and overbooked, I think a lot of
- 22:50times we have to look at like how much are we letting people
- 22:53in or how much are we asking for help?
- 22:56How much are we relying on our spouses or our friends, our
- 23:01church community to not just like physically help write and
- 23:04fill in the gaps, but even just to know what we're going
- 23:07through? When I was at my most overbooked
- 23:10and overwhelmed seasons of like, I'm so strapped.
- 23:13I'm so distant from God. I am running on empty and even
- 23:17just believing the lie that I like.
- 23:18Everything depends on me. I, looking back, did not tell
- 23:23people about it. I mean, I didn't even like tell
- 23:25my best friends. Like they would ask me, how are
- 23:27you doing? I'm like, you know, we're doing
- 23:28great, right? Everything's fine or my husband,
- 23:31right? Like I wasn't even asking him in
- 23:32that certain situation to like help me with dishes like so I
- 23:35could go to bed. I, I'm like, I have to do it.
- 23:38It all depends on me. I have to do it.
- 23:40And I think if we're honest with ourselves, when we feel that
- 23:43way, when we feel distant from God, when we feel like
- 23:46everything is on us, riding on us, it's because like that that
- 23:50feeling is only amplified when we don't let people in.
- 23:52And so telling people even like, hey, can you pray for me?
- 23:56Or Hey, I am really struggling. I don't know how to balance
- 23:59this. Do you have any advice for me or
- 24:02to your husband or, you know, to maybe even like a grandma, if
- 24:05she, you know, if you have kids, someone that can help you with
- 24:08your kids being like, hey, I'm really struggling today.
- 24:10Would you be able to come over and help me with the kids for an
- 24:12hour so that I can get this done or so that I can go take a rest?
- 24:16I mean, I think we neglect ourselves so much out of guilt,
- 24:19out of feeling like, and we have to be the ones who shoulder it.
- 24:22Yeah. And so there's a chapter in the
- 24:24book where we talk a lot about what it looks like to draw on
- 24:26community and, and how to ask for that help and to really lay
- 24:30down our pride. Because pride is a huge thing
- 24:32that I've struggled with in my life, feeling like I can't ask
- 24:34for help, feeling like I shouldn't ask for help.
- 24:37And so just letting people in and not robbing people of the
- 24:40joy that it is to help you. I've had conversations with my
- 24:44husband, with my parents, with my friends, where they say, I
- 24:47really wish you would have told me sooner because I would have
- 24:49loved to help you. I would have loved to be there
- 24:51for you because God has given those people the gifts and the
- 24:55willingness and the desire to help you.
- 24:57And if we don't reach out, they can't exercise the gifts that
- 25:01God has given them. And that was game changing.
- 25:03Yeah, that's so good because I just remember back when my kids
- 25:07were little and it was hard for me to ask for help.
- 25:11It was hard. There's something about like,
- 25:13being a new mom and you're just like, you know, I'm super mom, I
- 25:18can do it all. And like you said, it's like a
- 25:20pride thing and and you don't know it at the time.
- 25:23You're just like, you know, I want to be the best mom
- 25:25possible. But you've got this, you know,
- 25:28weird perspective on that. Like, no, like you could be a
- 25:33great mom still asking for help. And so, yeah, it wasn't until my
- 25:38husband been realized I had all three of them under the age of
- 25:42five. And that was my breaking point
- 25:45where I'm like, yeah, okay, I need help.
- 25:47I'm totally outnumbered. And he was going to the office
- 25:51for work. It was back in those days where
- 25:55working remote was pretty much unheard of.
- 25:58And so, you know, and I did, I needed help.
- 26:01And so I'm so glad that, you know, I let my walls down.
- 26:06And it's it's the way that enemy, I mean, his tactic is to
- 26:10like, make us ice, to isolate ourselves, right, to keep us
- 26:15from reaching out and be in community and have
- 26:18accountability. He wants us to feel like we're
- 26:21all alone. We got to do this all on our own
- 26:23and totally this on our shoulders, like you said.
- 26:26So. Yeah, yeah, that's so good that
- 26:29you just shared that bit of wisdom right there.
- 26:32And so I want to hear about rest.
- 26:36What is your suggestion on rest? Because I know we have these
- 26:39misconception, you know, these these ideas of what we think is
- 26:45rest. And like we were speaking about
- 26:47it earlier in this podcast where, you know, we feel like
- 26:50maybe it's a waste of time to rest or we're being lazy or
- 26:53being idle. And, and so I, I wanted to dump
- 26:57dive into that and I had another question about how do you juggle
- 27:05like you're a podcaster. I'm a podcaster, you've written
- 27:08two books, I believe. And so it's like I'm being a mom
- 27:13of littles and like you said, and a wife that, you know, cooks
- 27:17and does whatever you do at home also to maintain the household.
- 27:22So how do you how do you find time to write a book and do your
- 27:28podcasting? Because I'm, I'm in the thick of
- 27:31that of writing a book and podcasting and I'm having a hard
- 27:36time and I don't even have littles.
- 27:38So maybe combine those two questions with the rest in that
- 27:43schedule. Absolutely.
- 27:45REST has transformed my life. I have never felt like I'm in a
- 27:49better groove with rest in my life over the last couple years.
- 27:52But before that I was I had a horrible relationship with rest
- 27:57because I don't I just again had this pride and this idea of the
- 28:01self-sufficiency like there's too much to do.
- 28:04There's no time to rest when in reality I had the time.
- 28:07I just was giving it to other things.
- 28:09And so if we go all the way back, just to give a very broad
- 28:12definition biblically of what rest is, the first moment we see
- 28:15rest come on to the scene is modeled by God.
- 28:18It's modeled in the creation story.
- 28:20God didn't need to rest yet. He modeled it for us, right?
- 28:24So he created the world. And then he said, you know, I'm
- 28:26going to take this day to enjoy and to celebrate what I have
- 28:30made and also model it for Adam and Eve, to also model it for
- 28:35creation and to say, hey, we can celebrate and enjoy and feast
- 28:41and praise God for what he has done in our life.
- 28:44But also we are not like God. We are finite, right?
- 28:47And so rest isn't just about celebrating and enjoying and
- 28:51praising God and trusting him, but it's also like, hey, we
- 28:54have, we are physical bodies, right?
- 28:57And so we can't always go, go, go.
- 28:59And So what a gift it is from God to be able to rest, but God
- 29:03leaves on us to say, hey, you have to find and figure out what
- 29:06that looks like for you. Something that changed the game
- 29:08for me practically when we talk about rest is having regular
- 29:13rhythms of rest because years ago I used to say, like, OK,
- 29:17I'll rest when I've, you know, totally reached my limit.
- 29:20I'll rest when I'm so exhausted, when it's woven into the
- 29:24creation story that rest is a rhythm.
- 29:27I mean, if you even just look back at, you know, the
- 29:30Israelites, like they had so many parties and feasts and
- 29:34celebrations that were literally woven into their calendar year
- 29:37that they did not miss that they took off of work.
- 29:39They dropped everything. They, you know, they cooked just
- 29:42for that day. And then everything else, you
- 29:44know, it was just about resting and feasting and celebrating and
- 29:48taking time off of work and how even just Sabbath was integrated
- 29:51a day where they completely took everything thing off.
- 29:53I mean, let's go back to the story of when God provided mana.
- 29:57He said you can only gather what is for today, and then you can
- 30:01gather a little extra for your Sabbath.
- 30:03But rest is really also just this reliance on God that, you
- 30:08know, I am not God, but you are. And I can rest and I can see
- 30:12that you still will provide, you still care for me, and that work
- 30:15will still be there tomorrow, but you will sustain me.
- 30:19And so rest is really this trust.
- 30:20I mean, you said that at the beginning, resting is trusting
- 30:22in God. And so just having I, I think to
- 30:25the person listening that thinks that they can't take a day off,
- 30:28that they can't because there's too much laundry, there's too
- 30:29much work, there's too many mouths to feed, There's too many
- 30:32things. I will tell you that you can,
- 30:33you can't afford not to rest because the things that you are
- 30:37responsible for, the things that God has given you to steward,
- 30:40they are depending on you like God has given you things that
- 30:43you are responsible for. And you need to show up for, for
- 30:45the Kingdom, for God's glory, for his people.
- 30:48And so if you want to do that, well, you need to rest.
- 30:52And so for me, what this looks like is even just daily.
- 30:55Like even if that looks like the 10 minutes of the hour that my
- 30:58boys, their naps overlap. Like some of it's me getting
- 31:01some work done, maybe even 10 minutes of me laying down on the
- 31:04couch listening to a podcast, closing my eyes in silence.
- 31:08Or I love to cook and bake. Maybe rest is that for me.
- 31:11Maybe it's going on a walk for you with your family.
- 31:14Maybe that's, you know, doing a workout.
- 31:16Maybe that's going on a drive by yourself.
- 31:18Maybe that's even just a bath at the end of the night before you
- 31:21go to bed, like just having something throughout your day
- 31:24that's regular and rhythmic and also just not forsaking your
- 31:29Sabbath. And we talk about that in one of
- 31:30the chapters too, about walking at Jesus pace and having more of
- 31:34a sustainable rhythm. So I would really say just
- 31:38again, it depends on it the work that you do that I know you care
- 31:41about and you treasure depends on you resting.
- 31:44And then the last thing I would say with just your question
- 31:46about like how to have a sustainable rhythm and do, I
- 31:50don't know, podcasting and book writing while also keeping up
- 31:53with it. I think it's just really like, I
- 31:55don't know, consistency and finding the pockets of time for
- 31:58me is huge in the season of life where I'm not only drawing on
- 32:02help because right now my mom is hanging out with my boys while
- 32:04I'm recording this. Not only drawing on the help
- 32:06that you can, but just like taking the moments that you can.
- 32:10I mean, for me, it's not, I don't get a full work day
- 32:13uninterrupted, but just maximizing those moments I think
- 32:16is really been beneficial for me.
- 32:18I know that's maybe not the most practical advice, but also just
- 32:22being really, really realistic with your time as well and
- 32:24deadlines. For me, I have to plan out
- 32:26really far in advance with my boys to schedule with my
- 32:29schedule and for my motivation to be so present with my boys.
- 32:32I have to think like long game and let maybe things take a
- 32:35little bit longer than maybe they normally would.
- 32:38But that's that's been really helpful.
- 32:41Yeah, that's so good. I know I've, I've been feeling,
- 32:44you know, kind of giving myself these deadlines and I'm like,
- 32:48what am I doing to myself? Like I'm like, I could push
- 32:51those deadlines. But yeah, I think that
- 32:53definitely goes with going with Jesus pace instead of the
- 32:56world's pace. I love that you said that in
- 32:58your book. Jesus pace is not the same as
- 33:02what the world says. And so I'd rather be, you know,
- 33:06in lockstep with Jesus then what the world is trying to put on me
- 33:12and the pressures of everything. Yeah, there's a part in that
- 33:16chapter where we look at Jesus's life and we look about how he
- 33:20spent time with God in a day. So we look at like what he did
- 33:23at the start of the day. We literally look at Scripture.
- 33:25We look at what he did in the middle of the day.
- 33:27I mean, look what he did at the end of the day.
- 33:29There's literally passages in Scripture of how Jesus took
- 33:32these respites and maximize these moments to spend time with
- 33:36God. And so I love that chapter
- 33:38because it's like Jesus wasn't just going, going, going.
- 33:40Like he knew what was important. He poured out with people and he
- 33:44did have a very busy schedule. He was traveling, he was
- 33:47speaking, he was teaching. But he also, like we see in
- 33:49Scripture, he took those moments to rest and to spend time with
- 33:52Jesus. And even when he was so busy, he
- 33:55still made the most of even that limited time.
- 33:57And I just love the example that he lays for us.
- 34:00Yeah, Amen to that. I know Lisa Turkers had written
- 34:04some stuff in your book and had some words.
- 34:07And one of the things that really stuck with me, I did her
- 34:10best. Yes, Bible study and so good.
- 34:13She. Yeah, she had said a woman who
- 34:16lives with the stress of an overwhelmed schedule will often
- 34:19ache with the sadness of an underwhelmed soul.
- 34:23Yes, I love that quote. I know And I'm just like and
- 34:27that stuck with me OK? Like overwhelmed equals an
- 34:32underwhelmed soul. Like that's what it gives you.
- 34:35And it's so true. And so I love how your book just
- 34:40feeds us the truth and just this practical application with going
- 34:45to God's Word, spending time in our relationship with Him, not
- 34:50just in those little quiet times, but throughout the day to
- 34:54keep us going and to renew our strength.
- 34:57And especially as young moms as you are with littles, you guys
- 35:02need it. Yes, yes.
- 35:04So OK, so I am going to conclude our time here with a take away,
- 35:10something that our listener can ponder on or take action in and
- 35:15go ahead and share all the goodies you're offering and your
- 35:18when your book is up for. Absolutely.
- 35:21Oh, I've loved this time. This has been so precious to me.
- 35:23One take away, I would say as far as like a practical.
- 35:26So when it comes to like, hey, Tara, how do I put this into
- 35:29practice? Like how do I keep up with God
- 35:31when I'm just trying to keep up with life?
- 35:32Right. So I want to take, I want you to
- 35:33take a look at your schedule, whether it's right now in this
- 35:35moment or the next day, whenever you're listening to this, take a
- 35:38look at what you have to do in a day.
- 35:40And I always encourage people to do what I call a big three and
- 35:43OK, just hear me out. I'm not saying just do three
- 35:45things in a day because that's impossible.
- 35:47But what I am saying is look at your three non negotiables for
- 35:50the day. So whether that's like spending
- 35:52time with God, making dinner for your family, getting work done,
- 35:55whatever, you know, let's just whatever three that is, OK.
- 35:58And I think that's for me, probably my 3:00 today even.
- 36:01And so looking at those and saying, Lord, OK, of course,
- 36:04surrender and commit that to the Lord.
- 36:06But I think the easiest way to get overwhelmed and overbooked
- 36:09is to think that there are 30 things that are non negotiable
- 36:13in a day. And that used to be me.
- 36:14I'm like, OK, my list, everything has to be done.
- 36:17And when I started living by more of this big three, maybe
- 36:20even big my big 5 mindset, I'm like, OK, Lord, these are the
- 36:24most important things in my day and I would love to get these
- 36:27done. So I'm going to go after these.
- 36:28Everything else can wait till tomorrow.
- 36:30I'm not saying to complete like not do that task or that
- 36:33important thing, but can it wait?
- 36:36Because everything else, meaning your time with God, your
- 36:38presence with your family, your own rest, that is also worthy.
- 36:43And when we try to book our calendars out with 30 most
- 36:45important absolute things, then we neglect what really matters,
- 36:49which is our soul and our attention and our presence with
- 36:51God. So kind of maybe trying to
- 36:53adopting that, that big three, even big 5 mindset of what's the
- 36:56most important things and what can I also do tomorrow?
- 37:00Like what can we we can finish this this week, right?
- 37:03But it doesn't have to be done today to save my sanity, to save
- 37:06my presence with God. That's probably my take away for
- 37:08you today. And yeah, if this conversation
- 37:11encouraged you, I would love if you could grab a copy of
- 37:14Overbooked and overwhelmed. It's available anywhere you get
- 37:17books now. It came out on August 5th.
- 37:19So you can get that on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Christian
- 37:21book, literally anywhere, which is so fun.
- 37:24And yeah, if you want to keep up with me, I have a weekly podcast
- 37:27as well called Truth Talks with Tara Anywhere, and I'm over on
- 37:31Instagram at Miss Tara's Son. So yeah.
- 37:34Yes, well, I love it. I love everything you're doing
- 37:37for his. Thank you.
- 37:39I love your podcast called Truth Talks with Tara and your book is
- 37:44amazing. Thank you.
- 37:46You are a precious person, just I could see how much of God's
- 37:52love just exudes out of you. So thank you so much for coming
- 37:55on here. Thank you so much, it was so
- 37:57much fun. Thank you so much for listening
- 38:01today, and I trust that God has encouraged you through this
- 38:04story. Did you know this podcast is on
- 38:07YouTube? Hop on there and subscribe and
- 38:10you can see a live recording of each episode.
- 38:14And For more information on this ministry and to access free
- 38:18downloads, please visit my website at jamieelizabeth.com.
- 38:22That's JAYME elizabeth.com. And let's connect beyond this
- 38:28podcast by going to my Instagram handle, Jamie Elizabeth.
- 38:32She speaks life or Facebook. Until next time, my friend, I
- 38:36hope God reveals himself through your own life story.