Latest / A Hamster With a Blunt Penknife - a Doctor Who Commentary podcast / Talks to Jon & Eddie Arnold about their choice of The Ice Warriors (3/6)

Transcript

Talks to Jon & Eddie Arnold about their choice of The Ice Warriors (3/6) · A Hamster With a Blunt Penknife - a Doctor Who Commentary podcast

0:36
Welcome back to the Hampstead Blunt Pen Knife Doctor Who
0:40
commentary podcast. Tonight I'm joined by two
0:44
idiots, and fortunately we have the one that's slightly smarter.
0:50
Mr. Joe Ford. Say hello, Joe.
0:52
Well, hello there, how are you? And then the slightly Dumber and
0:57
stupider 1 Mr. John Arnold, please say hello, Father.
1:02
Hello. Father, he's the only one that's
1:05
written a black archive out of the three of us, though, you
1:07
know. Well yeah, a dedicated 1 to me.
1:11
Between us, we're averaging more than one black archive each.
1:14
He didn't know me then, Eddie, but I'm hoping if he does
1:17
another one, you know I'm there in the acknowledgement
1:19
somewhere. Yeah, he he tributed me in the
1:22
11th tower. Oh what a great episode to have
1:25
a tribute so. Yeah, an actor was Amy Pond in.
1:28
Yeah, no, they started. Well, except for that short
1:33
skirt. Oh gosh.
1:35
Anyway. Oh the the kisser grab stuff
1:37
did. You want to hear my soul?
1:40
Yeah. OK, you ready?
1:42
Give me a count in. Let's go.
1:44
Ready. 321. Victoria.
1:51
Victoria. Why are you such a cunt?
1:56
Victoria. Victoria.
1:59
Now that's about all I've got, I'm afraid.
2:02
What do you think? It's a class.
2:04
It's an instant classic. He's given me the figure.
2:10
Oh God, oh I love how we bring out your fire.
2:14
Where are we going to get to by episode 6?
2:16
I dread to think it's a good. Maybe it's a good thing we're
2:19
not doing this all in one the height.
2:22
Yeah, it's 10:00 nearly already. We would have been done.
2:25
Till 1:00 in the morning. Oh well, it's worse than a
2:28
strictly this. Oh well, like just as if we gone
2:32
for six episodes and it would have been a length for Strictly.
2:36
Terrifying. Terrifying.
2:39
At least at the end of this I get to say, see you next
2:41
Tuesday. You do.
2:45
What has happened to you? You came on midnight.
2:52
You was. You are an innocent pup.
2:55
You've become a monster. I I, you know what I did?
2:59
I went on the Hamster with a blunt pen knife podcast.
3:01
Well, it corrupts. Us already.
3:03
It really does. First hadoke that me.
3:07
Look at him. He's.
3:07
Leaning back in his chair like a fucking super villain, right?
3:10
Now. I'm not sure if I can do it, but
3:15
just imagine that from Inferno. That's right, Eddie, you know.
3:23
I mean when I. Eventually hang up my microphone
3:25
because eventually I've got to shut up.
3:28
I may have to just give this podcast to you.
3:31
You're the only person that could be as horrid to everybody
3:33
as me. Yeah, well, yeah.
3:35
But you know, I, you know, I don't think you'll probably ever
3:38
stop blabbering. So I don't think that microphone
3:40
is ever going. Up No.
3:42
I think you're probably right, yeah.
3:43
My ego wouldn't allow it, you know, just to shut up.
3:46
It's like long, far future in the retirement home and you're
3:50
just. You're.
3:51
Just talking on your AI microphone.
3:53
Welcome back to Hamster with a blunt pen, knife foot.
3:56
And you're doing the first episode of Billie Piper's
4:00
Doctor. Yeah.
4:01
Oh, is that how long it's going to take?
4:03
I'm in retirement. OK.
4:04
Problems. Yeah, well, 16 years is the.
4:07
Average for a. Hiatus, you know.
4:12
Of course I. Think I would be retired by
4:15
then? Hang on, 45 now 16 years?
4:17
What's that? What's that, Baker?
4:19
61 no you still. You know, I'd still be Girls
4:22
have been putting bread on a shelf.
4:23
At 61, I'm sure. Oh dear idea.
4:27
What are we even here to talk about today?
4:29
Not my life. We're here to talk about the
4:31
latest product in Sainsbury's. Oh, really?
4:35
Well, it's a fascinating animated DVD called The Ice
4:38
Warriors. Yeah.
4:42
Stop that and get that free on iPlayer.
4:45
Keep it. What if I play it goes down
4:49
though? Yeah, well, this is something my
4:51
other half warns me of all the time, which is why we've got all
4:54
this blood. Physical media everywhere.
4:56
DVDs, books, big finishes. They're everywhere.
4:59
We're getting all the, we're getting all the collections
5:02
anyway, A. What as they come out?
5:05
13's out soon, you know. Yeah, we're going to the BFI
5:07
event. Oh, what are you?
5:10
I've heard you'll be around that day.
5:12
Well, we won't be at the PFI, but we're going to be at the
5:14
Fitzroy John, if you're coming that way.
5:17
I'll be there too, see what we can do.
5:19
Oh, not you. Come on, come and say hello,
5:22
Eddie, Come and say hello. I'm gathering all the geeks at
5:24
the pub and then I'll be. I'll be made to make sure you
5:30
don't get too drunk. Well, I don't drink, so I'll be
5:32
all right. You've got an easy one.
5:36
There, you're the one I imagine to drink the most, frankly.
5:40
This is just that natural insanity.
5:42
Joe. This is it's just my
5:45
eccentricness just comes naturally to me.
5:47
Well, frankly, I think if I had you in a drunk person next to
5:50
each other, I think I'd say you're the drunk one.
5:53
Oh my God, what a compliment. Why you go from throwing out
5:56
insults to throwing out compliments in a heartbeat.
6:01
I'm very good like that. But he's leaning back again,
6:05
like Doctor Evil. Oh yeah, or the brigade leader.
6:10
Stick an eye. Attach on for the next episode,
6:12
Ed. Unfortunately, I don't have 1:00
6:14
nearby. No, I'll.
6:16
Find one or we'll make 11. What, fellows, should we watch
6:22
this thing? Shall we do it?
6:24
And I don't know, shall we? I think we should, yes.
6:28
I'm going to try and try. And talk about the.
6:30
Story if I can. Yeah, yeah.
6:34
You know that ended last time. Well, every.
6:36
Time but you know they're. Still entertaining episodes, so
6:39
who cares? Oh yeah, it's like, I can't
6:42
imagine actually being a viewer and listening and watching the
6:44
song with the episodes. Well, excuse me all.
6:47
Right. I told you earlier that your
6:49
episodes doing extremely well for downloads.
6:52
OK, So I'm putting them off that we're just sitting here.
6:55
Insulting. Each other, I guess I'm, I guess
6:57
I'm just an increase in sales for you that's.
7:00
Right. Yeah, but if you're making money
7:01
off it, you'd just be bringing, you'd be bringing me back more
7:05
than there bringing back David Tennant.
7:09
How many times you come back? Four times.
7:10
That's about average for David Tennant, isn't it?
7:13
Per season. Yeah.
7:17
Somebody count us in. Come.
7:21
On who hasn't counted us in yet? Already everyone ready?
7:26
Oh gosh, not him. Yes, while you two were
7:34
blabbering on, as you would have it anyway, 321.
7:44
In episode 2, are we supposed to think there's just one Ice
7:47
Warrior? Probably.
7:50
Well, it's called the Ice Warriors.
7:53
But like, obviously the characters within the story
7:55
don't know. It's called the Ice Warriors,
7:57
like, as far as they're concerned.
7:58
How do you know they don't know that?
8:01
Well, they, I'm sure they don't know.
8:02
It's a piece of fiction, Eddie. Well, have you not seen Lux?
8:08
Yes, I have, yes. They didn't even mention any
8:14
classic stories in it, but they've got all the collections
8:17
in the background. They mentioned blink quite a few
8:21
times. Well, yeah, but that's not
8:22
classic well. Thank you.
8:24
I'm glad somebody said it. No, I don't quite like Blink.
8:27
I do quite like Blink. Yes.
8:30
As well. It's not best Doctor Who story
8:33
of all time worthy. No, but then I don't think
8:36
anybody's best Doctor Who story of all time is the best Doctor
8:39
Who story of all time. It's just too much of it to
8:42
declare. That that's because nobody's,
8:43
well, that's because nobody says their favorite Doctor Who story
8:45
is the war games. I do.
8:49
Well, yeah, but you're nobody in this situation.
8:51
You. Bitch.
8:58
Oh boy, oh boy, John. I'm starting to feel like.
9:01
I'm living in your house now, all right?
9:03
Well, he does this every time, I say.
9:05
Nobody, I was going to say. Suddenly I think I'm busy next
9:10
Tuesday. No, I'm not.
9:11
I'm not. I love it, really.
9:13
And then you keep me. Real.
9:19
Oh, what's the Karen here between the Doctor and Jamie?
9:22
What sort of suit is Jamie in? Hello.
9:26
It's like it's made of plastic, doesn't it?
9:27
Like I see through Mac, it's. Transparent, isn't it?
9:31
Or. Where are they going?
9:32
Out into the wilderness, yeah. Yes, out into the Arctic
9:35
wilderness. Why?
9:38
For a laugh. Is it?
9:40
Is it to get Vic? No, they no, they don't care
9:43
about Victoria. They're just, they're just going
9:45
out there to get ready to leave. Victoria live in her home with
9:51
her new found Ice Warrior friends.
9:54
I don't think it's going to be a sitcom in the making, you know?
9:57
What? What, you wouldn't pay to watch
10:00
that? Victoria and Varga not.
10:04
The good life. V&V.
10:09
Vargo, can you go and get a vianetta out of the freezer
10:12
please? Totally lost track of the story.
10:19
You know I you know why as I just don't know the.
10:21
Fire on again. Always melted.
10:26
Whack. Whack.
10:30
Two and three I really don't know much about.
10:32
I really am a bit dense about two and three because these are
10:37
the ones I've watched the least. Because they're out of me.
10:41
Also, are you implying you don't watch the story and it's all?
10:45
I am. This sounds exactly like my
10:48
father when he keeps telling me the story of how he didn't get
10:50
Remembrance of the Daleks taped. Episode 4 specifically.
10:56
What had you seen an answer? More that when I miss Snake
10:58
Dance 3 and Time the Irani 3 classic.
11:02
No. Yeah, he missed.
11:04
He missed snake dance because he got because he had to go.
11:06
Watch my man's already told me she regrets taking me to a
11:09
pantomime the night at snake dance 3.
11:10
She left me beyond, she says. How sad were you?
11:13
Did you make a fuss? Yeah, he was so sad he didn't
11:16
get to see the toga. Well, hell yeah.
11:20
And you didn't get to see that enormous throbbing brain in time
11:23
and the Rani, you know, at the end of Episode 3.
11:27
I know not for a week. I had to wait an extra week.
11:33
Oh look, now we're doing a cooking programme with store.
11:36
And Pendley making soup. At least I've been able to watch
11:40
every classic story in its entirety every time.
11:46
It's like, look at you lot. I just want looking at you lot.
11:51
I don't even remember a time without Enemy of the World not
11:53
being there. Oh, all right.
11:56
That's just because you're young, though.
11:58
Yeah. Go back to you olden days you
12:00
people. Go go reminisce on how the 80s
12:02
was the best era of life and whatnot.
12:05
But now I'm going to challenge you now then, because we have to
12:10
build up our collection slowly and we watch this stuff again
12:14
and again. And that is why it's all in
12:17
here, all the actors, all the directors, all the information.
12:20
Nowadays kids binge it all and it doesn't go in in the same way
12:25
I don't think. Well, yeah, but that's because
12:27
nobody gives a damn about who the actors and script what and
12:30
whatnot. Well.
12:31
Why there are all those non fiction books about it then?
12:34
The people. Oh, he's just, he's just
12:37
written. Toby.
12:38
Heydo, go. Here's your life.
12:40
Go on, Toby. Sorry, Toby.
12:44
Oh dear, we better not tell him. That and see season 2.
12:48
Well, season 2's already. Kevin, Brazil.
12:50
Season 2's already going to be chaotic enough.
12:52
It's like it's us 3 together is already a lot.
12:56
And then and then we're going to have to add Gary and Toby to it.
12:58
But I'm not suggesting there's there is a way to watch Doctor
13:02
Who and I think bingeing it is the absolutely a perfectly valid
13:05
way of doing it. But because it was slow for you
13:09
and I, John, because we had to do it a bit at a time and like
13:12
build a big jigsaw with loads of gaps, it really did absorb,
13:17
didn't it? Like we obsessed over this
13:19
stuff. Oh yeah, Joe, where's all your
13:21
collections going to go after you die?
13:24
Yeah, probably landfill I reckon, when I threw out all the
13:29
targets once in a big bean bag. Oh well, should have.
13:32
Should have been the new adventures.
13:34
Yeah, you're right. Yeah.
13:36
Jesus Christ, they will send them to that orphanage to get
13:41
burnt. But disagree with a lot of them.
13:47
We'll do that on another podcast.
13:49
Oh. Dear.
13:51
What, you're going to go in a book club and talk about how
13:53
you're going to bend all your new adventures?
13:56
I'll teach him the Lord. Simple.
13:57
Oh my God, let's do that. Top ten.
14:00
Which ones should we burn? And I was just remembering the
14:04
other day, is it just before you, just before you lot, just
14:09
before you lot did the interview thing?
14:10
I was thinking like I had a question for them.
14:14
Why the hell did you decide to go on an interview with my
14:16
father? Oh, we had a great time, didn't
14:20
he, John? Steve Cole.
14:23
That was fantastic. Yeah, it was lovely.
14:25
Oh, he's such a lovely guy. Ask me a question and watch him
14:29
go boom. It was brilliant.
14:31
Although I spoke to Tim Foley yesterday.
14:33
My God, man. Coming into book club near.
14:36
You charming man, it was so charming.
14:40
Why don't you say like everyone who comes on here is charming
14:42
though? I don't say it about you.
14:44
Well, yeah. But that's.
14:46
That could. You probably get a rest if you
14:47
did. Well, yeah, there's that, but
14:51
also there's a distinct lack of charm from your corner, firing
14:55
out insulting arrows left, right and centre.
14:59
You should have seen all the Facebook posts about me several
15:01
years ago and everyone calling me the cutest little kid ever.
15:05
Well, I'm sure you are, but cute children can turn into monsters
15:08
in a couple of years, you know? Totally.
15:15
I mean, look at me. What's going on here?
15:18
Why are their knives being passed around?
15:22
Because they're promoting knives to children.
15:25
Just a friend actually, to be honest, that he talked to who
15:28
did that quite a lot. It's like and it's like and then
15:34
one and then it's like if you do go into an argument about is doc
15:38
was Doc 2 kid friendly enough? It's like, oh, promoting noise
15:41
and then oh Andrew the Tower, it promotes spiking drinks.
15:47
Very my house you you watch through classic who there's so
15:51
many blades on display in a way that you would never have on
15:54
children. Cough cough.
15:55
Leela. Leela, I mean bloody Revelation
15:59
of the Daleks is full of knives. And then resurrection of the
16:03
dogs. It's like all that carnage.
16:05
It's. A murder city, isn't it?
16:07
Resurrection. Yeah.
16:09
So it's like walking, walking out there is like walking to
16:13
electoral war zone. And the hinge script.
16:18
But you're a doctor. Picked up a gun in C to do.
16:21
Well, yeah, and then Sarah Jane did an impairment of Mars as
16:23
well. Cordo getting shot in Brain and
16:26
Morbius like it's just there's stuff in Classic who they just
16:29
wouldn't touch now isn't there? There's so much.
16:32
There's so much. I'm learning about pyramids and
16:34
Miles from your podcast the other day.
16:36
What Especially the being crushed between two fabulous
16:40
pair of mummy tits? You're never going to get over
16:43
that, are you? Because I know that would be
16:46
your dream. In life it's the oddest death
16:49
ever and Doctor Who, but I love it.
16:51
You know, I think, I think it's the thing I think because I'd
16:53
never realized it was how Robert Holmes just never likes killing
16:56
women. Yeah, he did say that.
16:59
That is an actual quote. Yeah, and that's probably why he
17:02
left Meg Seeley alive, because she's just too iconic to die.
17:05
I know. Well, she's got a double
17:06
barreled shotgun though, isn't she?
17:08
Imagine how. Now you compare.
17:11
Meg Seeley to Victoria. I mean, they're Weld apart.
17:15
Well, yeah, legend. Legend has it.
17:17
Meg Seeley just didn't die because because heaven saw how
17:20
iconic she was, so they sent her back down.
17:23
But she's still with us today. I mean, have you ever seen
17:28
Downtime, Eddie? Oh, unfortunately, I've had the,
17:32
I've had the death privilege of watching it.
17:35
Yeah, see another dismal Victoria story.
17:38
Well, it's like, it's like I think I watched it in my
17:41
wilderness years phase of thing. But what do we learn from
17:46
downtime that these horrific adventures that the doctors to
17:49
put her through nectar scarred for life and unable to form
17:53
attachments to people. We we learned two things.
17:57
One that Moffett thought it was a good idea to bring Kate
17:59
Stewart from there. And.
18:02
The superior Kate Struer, Beverly Chrisman.
18:05
And two, we learned how not to make a Doctor Who episode.
18:09
Yeah, well, though Christopher Barry did direct that one, you
18:12
know. Yes, and there's a reason he was
18:15
retired by that. Yes, indeed, indeed.
18:20
Yeah, as as much as I love the Yeti, it is probably the worst
18:23
piece of Doctor Who media I have ever seen.
18:26
Oh, Dylan Reece is crying right now.
18:29
What does he like He. Loves.
18:32
He hates the abominable. Snowman and he loves downtown.
18:35
I think so. You need to.
18:36
I think you need to go to a mental institute ASAP.
18:39
Well, a lot of people think that about him, if I'm honest.
18:42
Oh yeah, I mean, I mean, I've also shared my money.
18:44
He's never seen Zygon, so he's winning at life.
18:47
Who hasn't? Eddie.
18:50
Yeah, I. Haven't Eddie?
18:51
You don't watch that, Zygon. Until you're 18 years old, all
18:54
right. Oh well, see you in seven months
18:57
when I have then. Oh no no dude, don't watch Zygon
19:03
until you're like 118. Or until you've had a taste
19:08
bypass. Oh, what?
19:10
God, yeah. Oh, it's it's.
19:13
It's lurid, don't watch it, it is rubbish.
19:16
It's just terrible. It's terrible.
19:19
It wants to be lurid and it isn't.
19:22
My This is why when my father makes the argument saying oh,
19:26
the 90s is arguably one of the best decades of doctor, I'm
19:28
like, no, have you seen what a small stuff they put out on
19:33
television? What in the 90s?
19:36
Yeah. I agree.
19:38
With you don't have a straight to video.
19:40
I think the 90s TV was the best TV, the best decade for me.
19:45
Oh, you reminiscing back of your olden days now?
19:48
Certainly everyone look at the. Bills they're bringing out.
19:50
These days you can either say it's the twenty 20s is the best
19:53
decade of television. Well, I mean you.
19:58
Well I mean frankly from what I've seen about 90s it all
20:01
looked very annoying and boring to me.
20:05
Buffy the Vampire Slayer Star Trek series.
20:08
As well, I've only ever seen one episode of Buffy.
20:11
Oh, you're missing out there. Babylon 5.
20:14
Oh God. And the only.
20:16
Take it back. About the 90s.
20:18
Yeah, the only reason I saw Buffy was because was because of
20:21
how when the actors died so they decide to put on musical episode
20:27
in tributes and they were saying the whole way through.
20:33
Yes, my father and my mother singing the whole way through
20:37
the musical episode. Oh, singing, I thought you said
20:39
saying Oh yes, I'm under your spell, how else can I be?
20:47
Anyone put me through? You have to.
20:49
Put me through that again. They got the mustard.
20:59
You make this sort of song about the Ice Warriors episode 3.
21:02
Oh, do you want the Victoria as a Cunt song again, Vic?
21:09
Uncle. I think we should put that all
21:12
to #1 on the charts. Hang on, hang on, hang on.
21:20
Victoria. She's trapped by Varga.
21:22
She is wearing a lovely parka. No.
21:27
OK, I'll try. It is it did You have to say too
21:30
many nice things about her? That's about as far as.
21:36
Uncle. Yeah, hang on.
21:40
Whenever she's in the show, it is such a lag.
21:46
No, I would have had a better look.
21:48
You should have said whenever she, whenever she's in the show,
21:52
she makes me want to blow my brains out.
21:55
Oh, that's great. I mean, I was going to rhyme
21:57
lag. Good slag.
21:58
But I'm glad you stopped me. I should stop short calling her
22:03
a slag. Really.
22:05
OK, what's going on? Why did Deborah Watling have
22:07
deserved to get calls a cunt? No, not Deborah Watling,
22:12
Victoria. Deborah Watling gave us that.
22:14
Wonderful. Actress are two separate things.
22:17
She gave us that wonderful performance in the Missing Years
22:20
documentary where she said every single they found missing
22:25
episodes in Hong Kong. Yeah, but then she had.
22:30
The unfortunate. Of the unfortunate disc
22:33
privilege of being in downtown. Yeah.
22:37
Dimensions in time. Baby dimensions in time.
22:41
It makes. Dimensions.
22:43
Terrible. Well, down to Downtime makes
22:45
Dimension in Time looks like it's the best Doctor Who story
22:48
ever made. Oh, Joe, I'm going to say
22:51
something nice about Victoria now.
22:52
God shock horror. But this sequence where the
22:55
fellas killed and she is terrified and goes, my God,
23:00
you're not going to kill me, are you?
23:02
For that second, I actually genuinely believe she's in
23:05
proper distress. There you go, I can do it.
23:12
OK, now files right here you can do the thing.
23:16
No chance I I will be nice when she'll do something to merit it.
23:23
Oh I know, I know. How about you go to Fear from
23:25
the Deep and watch episode 6? I did that last week.
23:30
And, and would you say anything nice about the ending aside she
23:34
leaves? Damn, sorry, rude at me.
23:41
I I do. I do credit Deborah Watling with
23:43
actually trying to act in that last episode, even though she's
23:46
not up to it, in the same way that Sophie Audrey is not up to
23:50
that boom scene in Battlefield. Now.
23:56
You you father you saying something bad about ACE?
24:00
I think I'm in a parallel timeline.
24:04
Well, no, I I can acknowledge that it's not a very good scene.
24:07
The evidence. There are other scenes where
24:11
where Sophie Aldridge's enthusiasm is greater than her
24:14
acting ability, shall we say. Joe might put that less
24:20
politely. But it's 90% of the time.
24:24
Well yeah, but Joe is literally the only ace hater I've ever
24:27
seen. No, no, no.
24:28
No, no, no, a lot. Of people think she's terrible,
24:31
they just love Sophie Aldridge because she's been in fan
24:34
circles and conventions all these years and she's made a
24:38
career out of being a lovely person.
24:40
She's a lovely person who can't act.
24:43
Well then explain how you're the only hater I've seen.
24:47
Because I'm the only one that is honest, Eddie.
24:50
And I dare to imagine how you were watching Power of the
24:52
Doctor. Oh no, I really loved her in
24:55
that. The bit where she leans forward
24:57
at the end and goes. Are you okay like Jesus?
25:01
Christ, I thought. Yep.
25:02
She still hasn't got it. And then I can't imagine how you
25:09
were watching this teaser for it at the end.
25:11
You're legend of the sea. There falls.
25:13
No, I knew because my other half worked in Cardiff at the time
25:18
where they filmed Power of the Doctor and some stupid person
25:23
working on the production team left 5 pages of the script in
25:26
the bin. So this was two years before it
25:30
was announced that they were going to be in Power of the
25:32
Doctor, and he knew then and told me.
25:34
So I knew I was sitting on that for years.
25:37
Before it was officially announced.
25:39
He found it in the bin. Yeah, fight.
25:41
We've still got it. We've still got a bit of script
25:44
and he, he zooms me and he goes, you're not going to believe
25:47
this. Ace and Tegan are going to be in
25:50
a Jodie Witt. I went, oh, shut up, I went.
25:53
They've left a dummy script in the bin for God's sakes, for an
25:56
idiot like you to find and start spreading rumours.
25:59
And then and then when you saw it was true.
26:01
I was. Like whoops, I was wrong.
26:04
That was like me watching the Reality War, seeing all the
26:06
leaks come true. Yeah.
26:09
Oh yeah, there was all leaked, wasn't it that year.
26:11
Yeah, it's like, well, I was like, surely there's no way
26:14
that's going to happen. And then as I watched everything
26:16
that was said online happened, I was like, oh fuck.
26:19
Oh my fucking fuck you fuck fuck.
26:22
Bizarrely, the only one I didn't think would happen of all of the
26:25
ones I saw, was that Jodie was going to be in it and so I was
26:29
genuinely delighted when she showed up.
26:33
I didn't see. That one, it was great.
26:36
Eddie had actually loved that series up to the last 15
26:39
minutes. And then, yeah, you've never
26:42
seen a verdict go down so fast in your life.
26:46
Well, no, I wasn't. I never said anything bad about
26:49
it. On initial watch I was praising
26:50
it and then I went to Twitter and I saw everyone hated it.
26:55
No, you were the last 15 minutes when he regenerated.
26:58
You were. I was going oh fuck please don't
27:01
regenerate because I liked his Doctor.
27:04
Especially all that stuff about joy again.
27:06
Oh boy, Joy. Joy to the world.
27:10
Oh my God. You're going to have to bring me
27:13
on the 15th Doctor over for you, frankly.
27:17
Yeah, it's going to be vicious. It's.
27:21
Going to be funny. Now, what the hell was going on
27:24
in this story? You wouldn't know because
27:28
talking about reality war. Oh, Jamie's.
27:34
Jamie's waken. Up to advance the plot.
27:36
No, that is the problem with two and three is the plot doesn't
27:39
advance at all. You do get a lot of insight
27:42
though. The bit where where Miss Garrett
27:45
goes and visits Henley, you learn an awful lot in that
27:49
scene. Well, maybe that's why they bend
27:51
it, because they just decided, oh, let's bend the least useful
27:54
episodes of each serial. If only that were true, Eddie.
27:58
Then they wouldn't have kept episode free of Enemy of the
28:00
World. I'm not saying anything, but
28:05
frankly that's probably because I don't remember Enemy of the.
28:07
World that. Well, no, that that was saved
28:11
purely for Griffin. That's the only episode he's in,
28:13
and it's the glorious episode of the whole story.
28:16
My mother was Ryan. She wanted me to be a dustman.
28:24
Oh, love. Him.
28:25
Oh no, look, here goes Victoria now out on her own.
28:29
Oh bloody hell. Oh, is this where she's going to
28:33
scream because she sees a dead body?
28:35
Yeah, that's what she's saying right now.
28:40
Oh. She seems to be unmathed by the
28:45
dead body. Oh, this whole.
28:48
Sequence where she's talking. To her over the bloody thing.
28:52
She just screams and sniffles and you just want to shake her
28:55
and go. Will you just stop?
29:01
Bless her all. There's no nuance to this
29:05
performance. Well, it's not just that she
29:07
just shouldn't be on these adventures.
29:09
All the time. Don't you think she just
29:11
shouldn't be on these Avengers at all?
29:17
Oh yeah, I forgot we were on the commentary.
29:18
Sorry, I was watching this part intensely for the first time
29:21
this whole occurs. So, oh, they've sent her out
29:26
there, haven't they? So she's thinking she can talk
29:30
to the to the base and then they can overhear and maybe figure
29:34
out what's going on with the as they're.
29:36
Explaining. Right now, yeah.
29:38
She's not. She has courageous.
29:40
Shoot her, shoot her, go on. He's got a right at his sights.
29:50
Oh my God, what a great. Cliffhanger Victoria are about
29:52
to be. Shot what a way.
29:55
For us to leave this tonight. It's it promises so much and
29:59
delivers so good. No, not the story.
30:05
Yeah, no, this the cliffhanger. Oh, I see what you mean.
30:08
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's it.
30:12
What does that gum do? Is it?
30:13
Is it the mirror? Long gum I?
30:16
See. Yeah, it's it's a bigger version
30:18
of their Sonics thing. I like to think, you know when
30:22
they do the mirror long effect it's like it turns your organs
30:25
to Mars. Oh, now he's make sure you're
30:27
giving laws monologue. Oh, the warriors.
30:29
They're from Mars. Oh, that's right.
30:31
Oh, they want all them on the logging, they're telling.
30:34
They're asking to tell them about the spacecraft.
30:36
No, please. Please listen to me.
30:38
Art instead. And Jamie's disappeared.
30:41
Don't you understand? Oh, boy.
30:45
They're ruthless killers. No stopping nothing.
30:50
Oh, God. Look, she just.
30:51
Doesn't shut up. Why doesn't she move out of the
30:54
way either? Well, I suppose she doesn't know
30:57
the gun was there though. Well, yeah, but literally if she
30:59
moved then. Oh, look.
31:01
It's so. Enticing.
31:02
Just shoot her already. Oh, so slip boom.
31:07
They could have shot her in the face.
31:10
Oh. That would have been amazing.
31:11
Imagine her. Splattered over all the ice.
31:14
Wonderful. Kids traumatized for a
31:17
generation. Well, they did it.
31:19
To listen, I don't. I didn't think I'd of rather
31:21
seen Victoria do that. You wouldn't.
31:24
Yeah, I would rather have survived and my head Canon,
31:29
she's still surviving to this day because downtime also
31:32
doesn't exist. Well, it's not an official BBC
31:35
production. Oh, no, wait, I suppose the book
31:37
is, isn't it, John? No, the book was virgin.
31:40
Well, aren't we? Is Virgin not Canon?
31:44
It's licensed. It was licensed by the BBC.
31:48
Yeah. Yeah.
31:49
Yeah, OK. Yeah, I'll count it.
31:52
Well, Eddie, you're going to enlighten us with Fraser's
31:55
riveting point for episode 3. Excuse me, let me just get my
32:00
pillow out. I need to.
32:01
Get comfortable. OK, Ukulele.
32:04
So. Let's see.
32:07
So the opening line, Les Shaw's hat.
32:10
Sorry, Eddie, I'm only kidding. This one is the Ice Queen of
32:13
Scream herself, Vic. Oh God, I'm.
32:16
Sure by now. I'm sure by now you've slated
32:18
her for three solid episodes, yes?
32:20
We have. We have but.
32:23
Do, but do stop to think what you do in that situation.
32:27
Never mind an upperclassman Victorian orphan, I doubt you'd
32:31
have the wherewithal. Spy on the spy on the enemy and
32:35
make your darling escape. If if nothing else, this title
32:40
esteem has more chemistry than the Britannica space stink bomb
32:45
factory. But at the end of the day, who
32:48
single handedly kills the most Ice Warriors?
32:50
Yep, Victor. Really.
32:52
Yes. Not only is she a sniveler,
32:55
she's a murderous as well. She's irredeemable.
33:01
Yeah, maybe all that screaming is just hide her facade of bird
33:04
here. I mean she only kills.
33:06
All the ice for us because in the next episode she screams and
33:09
bring us half the mountain down on.
33:10
Top of it. Yeah, Take takes an innocent,
33:16
weak creature out as well. Shocking baby.
33:19
But he missed something in that comment.
33:20
He goes, well, think about what you would do in this adventure.
33:24
Yeah, she shouldn't be in this adventure she never should have
33:28
stepped well into. This is in this adventure is the
33:31
point. So what would you do if you were
33:33
there? Me.
33:35
You probably start. You'd probably start recording a
33:37
book club or something. No, well, you know, I probably,
33:40
I probably have an affair with Penley and then the affair with
33:44
Clint, you know, and then eventually move in the store.
33:48
If I if I if I had a list of all the Doctor Who characters you
33:51
would have to fit with, let alone this story.
33:53
It would be a long list, Eddie. Yeah, yeah.
33:56
I don't think the list would fit in the UK.
33:59
No. Sort of the length of the Magna
34:01
Carta, that sort of thing, yeah. Well, and then you now, now
34:07
you're going to tell you can have an affair with the King
34:09
Jong act from the King's demons. Why that desperate?
34:12
Good grief? Now, look, we're going to have
34:16
to try and sort of bring this Ice Warriors thing to some form
34:20
of a conclusion. Now, how do you feel the stories
34:23
going? Let's start.
34:24
With Eddie. Amazing.
34:27
Yeah, that's all I need to say is just going amazingly.
34:30
OK. Is it just because it's got Ice
34:32
Warriors, isn't it? No, just it's amazing.
34:35
OK, John. Slowly.
34:42
So, well, as they say, slow and steady wins a race.
34:46
They front loaded that first. The first episode I think is
34:49
genuine. You go piece of Doctor Who, but
34:52
I I don't know if it's the fact they moved from, you know, to
34:56
animation for this, which and they do try and give it constant
35:00
movement to keep it going, but it's already just in a loop
35:06
waiting for the story to progress.
35:08
So you it's a it's a four episode story and we we through
35:12
the 2 episodes of padding. I think we're through the worst
35:14
of the. Story.
35:15
I think you're right as well. Yeah, I think I think 2 and
35:18
three are the weakest of the story.
35:20
Because whilst they're whilst they're the worst, then must be
35:23
doing a very good job. Because four, which I watched
35:27
this morning, features that great chase through the ice with
35:31
the ice. And so suddenly things start
35:33
moving again. And then is.
35:35
Adoption. The doctor and Victoria together
35:38
and they're doing all the stink bombs and Jamie's getting
35:40
attacked by a wolf and suddenly just loads is loads is happening
35:44
in four anyway, Joe. What do you think so far?
35:47
I think episode 1 is superb. I think I skipped 2 and 3 for a
35:53
reason. Yes.
35:55
Because you're a measurable old bastard.
35:57
It's true. I do think that the second-half
36:00
of the story is unusually the stronger half of the story.
36:06
And I think there's great scenes between Clint and Penley in six
36:12
and yeah, like I've just said, great set pieces, some really
36:15
fine direction in the second-half.
36:16
So I'm looking forward to seeing you next Tuesday.
36:20
Yeah, I said it first. Well, taking on my scene.
36:32
He's the host. He's the person who always
36:35
claims to be warm and welcoming and inviting to all his guests
36:38
and letting them do all the stuff.
36:40
I'm warm and inviting to people. That don't sit there and.
36:43
Insult me for two hours? Yes.
36:45
What? So why do you invite John
36:46
Arnold? He's the most charming man
36:50
possible. And now and now let me add to
36:54
that list of Doctor Who characters.
36:55
Have an affair with all the people on the Hamster podcast
36:58
you'd have an affair with. Oh, have you?
36:59
Seen them? No, Eddie.
37:00
Oh, absolutely would. Have you seen them?
37:03
Yeah, I was hearing the start of that pyramid smiles.
37:06
You saying about Rob Valentine? Oh.
37:08
Yeah, we had a little affair. Yeah, me, Cameron from the
37:11
Polish box. We've certainly had a little
37:12
affair. Yeah, I mean.
37:15
Don't you know about Joe's Harim of Husbands?
37:18
His podcast? Husbands.
37:19
Not just husbands, they should. They should remake The Husbands
37:22
of every song but rename it The Husbands of Joe Ford.
37:24
Oh God, yeah. A.
37:26
Lot of heartbeat. Of course, I would also marry
37:30
Lucy McCall as well. You know, I have to be married
37:33
to a librarian. Yeah.
37:34
And Joe Sharp. Lovely.
37:36
Jamal nothing. I can't imagine you in a
37:38
straight relationship. Lovely.
37:40
So, well, no, we wouldn't do any of that sort of stuff, Eddie,
37:43
but we would sit and, you know, have tea together and discuss
37:46
intellectual things of the day. What, like the Ice Warriors?
37:51
Absolutely. The Ice Warriors, yes.
37:53
And Benton Hawthorne benches. Yes.
37:59
Well, look fellas. We have managed to get through
38:01
free episodes of The Ice Warriors now, John.
38:04
Too much of A chore, I hope. Well, my father will say you.
38:07
Guys know it's great. I can.
38:10
I can live with it. Oh, you said something.
38:12
Positive about the talking about anything but the Ice Warriors
38:15
with two episodes, it was fantastic.
38:17
He said the first episode was great as well.
38:19
Eddie. You know, I said.
38:20
I think we're changing him. Yeah, I think we're we're, we're
38:23
on our way. Let's just say, let's not be too
38:25
optimistic. When I'm Over in episodes 4:00
38:27
to 6:00. We will.
38:30
We will. Well.
38:31
Was that the plan all along? Yes.
38:35
Until We Attack episodes 4:00 to 6:00.
38:39
Thank you very much, gentlemen. Yeah, actually go and say that
38:43
again. I'll out it on that.
38:45
Cunt.