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Domestic Violence...What is it?? · Black Girl Interrupted Podcast

• 0:00
  Okay, welcome to another episode a Black Girl Interrupted. Of course you know
• 0:09
  it's sugirl Ashley and I got my six with me to the left. Come
• 0:16
  about girl? You want to tellable you all, I am owner of colors,
• 0:22
  black Keys and good CEO. Unless she eat, We're gonna do that
• 0:26
  and hope of Keach's Corner. That as on Friday for eight thirty pm Eastern
• 0:33
  Time and seven thirty pm Central Time for the ones that get a little confused.
• 0:40
  So like before we get me on, let me go ahead and run
• 0:44
  that intro for U tonight. Welcome to Black Girl Interrupted. We like to
• 0:51
  think that we are the new go to conversation on all things concerning the black
• 0:56
  woman experience, whether it's wellness, self love, self care, or empowering
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  one another. Black Girl Interrupted will interrupt that daily grimes, uplift change and
• 1:07
  empower women of color to a whole new level. Don't forget to join us
• 1:11
  each and every Tuesday night, eight pm Central Time, nine pm Eastern Time
• 1:18
  for all brand new episodes. All right, so y'all already, No,
• 1:40
  every Tuesday night you're going live with your girl actually, and we're talking about
• 1:44
  all the interruptions that all Black women encounter throughout life. So tonight, as
• 1:51
  I stated, every every episode is special to me, but tonight it is
• 1:56
  very personal. Tonight I'm putting us light on domestic violence awareness. October is
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  domestic violence Awareness mom, So we're gonna put the spotlight on it tonight.
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  I'm gonna share my story, my journey as well as my rule to recovery
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  and how I became a domestic abuse survivor. So, without further adult,
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  I got another video that I want to show it to you guys, and
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  then we're going to jump right on into the conversations. October is National Domestic
• 2:30
  Violence Awareness Month. Domestic violence is a pattern of behavior that includes use of
• 2:36
  threats of violence and intimidation for the purpose of gaining power and control over another
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  person. The COVID nineteen pandemic has led to an increase in domestic violence incidents
• 2:47
  nationwide, with people having no choice but to spend more time at home.
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  Gilbert was no exception. Calls for domestic violence have increased compared to this time
• 2:58
  last year. The reason for these calls are also different, with an increase
• 3:02
  in the intensity of crimes. Remember, domestic violence can happen to anyone regardless
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  of race, ethnicity, education level, religion, gender, or age.
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  Forty percent of the incidents reported in Gilbert involved people between the ages of twenty
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  six and thirty seven. Check in with your loved ones, even if you're
• 3:23
  unable to see them in person. If you think you are being abusive,
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  or you or someone you know is being abused, call the National Coalition Against
• 3:31
  Domestic Violence at one eight hundred seven nine nine seven two three three or text
• 3:38
  seven four one seven four one to speak to a live crisis counselor. For
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  more information regarding emergency helplines as well as non emergency resources, please visit Gilbert,
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  Ez dot gov forward slash dv AM. All right, so a bag,
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  So now you know, tonight again we are talking about domestic violence awareness
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  again. If you are a victim or you know somebody, I will post
• 4:10
  those numbers in the link. Reach out, talk to somebody, get some
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  help, get out before it's too too late. So without further adduces,
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  let's go ahead and let's jump right on into it. So there we go.
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  Domestic violence. What is it? What's your definition? You know?
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  Since what's your definition of domestic violence? Let's talk about it. Let's go
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  ahead and let's bring it to the forefront. Let's let's shine a light on
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  it, because it's happening every day. The rates are consistently increasing, especially
• 4:45
  amongst black women. Right. So, my take on domestic violence is actually
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  anything that involves me to me variable abuse, physical abuse, mentally mentally abuse,
• 5:01
  anything that requires shows some from abuse, no matter what it is.
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  But domestic abuse today involves a lot of physicality where men and all women are
• 5:17
  Women can be the abused, but it's just physical to the point where there's
• 5:24
  either no possibility of return, you're losing something, whether it's just I get
• 5:29
  here and it's been done before. So that's my fault domestic violence. But
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  anything that involves abuse, and just to kind of pick it back off what
• 5:43
  you're saying, when you hear the word domestic violence, people automatically assume physical,
• 5:49
  but there's emotional abuse where you're belittle, belittling somebody. You know,
• 5:55
  you're telling your partner, your mate, whoever, you're not good enough,
• 6:00
  or you're too fat, you need to lose weight, if you look like
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  you know, if you lose weight you look like this person, or you
• 6:05
  need to gain some weight, or your your But it's too small, mentally,
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  abusing somebody, having somebody believe, you know, not believing in themselves,
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  you know, their self work. You know, you're you're taking that
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  away from a person, you know, and you know, again, me
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  being a domestic abuse survivor, I experience all three of that. You know.
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  It was mental, it was emotional, and physical, you know,
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  so it's not just a physical thing. But a lot of people, like
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  I say, you know, contrary to believe, people are automatically assume when
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  you say domestic violence is physical, and that's not always the case. You
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  know. Do you know anybody assist that you know that it has experienced this?
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  Do you know anybody I do? It was very close, It was
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  very close. And now used to watch this to actually get beat on,
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  and nobody did anything to help at that point. Me, I was just
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  stuck, you know, I didn't know what to do. I'm I'm young
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  at this point, and to watch the person actually like get beat on and
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  scream for help and nobody's got to help her, you know. So yes,
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  I've seen it done. And we're talking physically the time it was always
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  two boys or anything. So yes, I've seen it done. Saying how
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  did that make you feel to see that? You know, I was scared.
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  I was scared only because what if he kills this woman, like in
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  front of me? What if? Even though at this point it's not about
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  me just seeing somebody just helpless, So it's more it just made me feel
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  who'll say awkward, But I was just scaring the phrase for her because again
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  I didn't want to do I'm gonna end. So did you did you ever
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  tell anybody about this person that was being abused? They knew, they didn't
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  What did they do? Nothing? That's typical. You know a lot of
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  people don't want to involve themselves in domestic violence situations, you know, because
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  we you know, you don't know that that person's train a thought in that
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  moment. You know they could kill you, end the person, or you
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  know, whatever the situation is. But I say, you know, if
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  you know anybody, reported try to help them, you know, if you
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  don't mind. How old were you sis when you were seeing this? I
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  would say about maybe ten? In levitations? Oh so you were young?
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  Yeah, I trust me, Yes, I was very young. I didn't
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  do anything. Did that affect you in any way as you got older?
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  Thinking if you if you what knowing what you know now and you look back,
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  Yeah, you were ten eleven years old. Do you feel like maybe
• 9:20
  I should have called not one one or maybe I should have you know,
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  win somewhere else? And and you know, well not as we talked about
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  it. I here's the thing. You know, you like you said,
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  you don't involve yourself is toughing because you know that person. Okay, So
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  me, if I said anything, I don't know what I would be.
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  You see what I'm saying like, I don't know what the relationship could be
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  like. So no, I didn't think about it calling then. And I
• 9:56
  you know, now that I'm older, if I thought about it, I
• 10:00
  probably would come down. I would say something then again, can it will
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  be another I would definitely trying too. So what about now now that you're
• 10:11
  older, have you experience have you your let me ask you this, have
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  you yourself ever experienced themestic domestic violence situation? Fortunately? Oh no, I
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  haven't. Oh I haven't experienced it. If we're talking about being well,
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  it's like head I had a Yeah, no, n't related to a relationship.
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  Just you know, recodifiable boy. I tell you, you know,
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  sis, just when you're when you're think about domestic violence and the things you
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  see on TV. I tell people it's real, you know what I'm saying,
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  Like, domestic violence is real. This ain't no h just a hit
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  here and there or a smart remark here there. This stuff is long term,
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  and it does go on to affect you long term. You know what
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  I'm saying. It affects you mentally, emotionally, you know. I remember
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  I was a little girl, you know, and my father was abusive to
• 11:30
  my mother, you know, And so when my mother left my brother,
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  my father, you know, he my mother had moved away, you know,
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  and left him and everything, and my mother moved away, he broke
• 11:43
  into my mother's apartment. My mother was in the showership was getting ready for
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  work, and I was, you know, by my grandmother's house. And
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  again my daddy broken to my mother's apartment and he shot at my mother because
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  my mother was leaving him, you know. Unfortunately, me and we got
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  there when it happened. But I'm so thankful that my mother the bullet missed
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  him. My mother, you know, when she talks about it, like
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  when I asked her about it, she says, all she remembers, she
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  feels a bullet going past stuff. He shipped up the bullet right go pass
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  stufface. My mom said, if she would have moved ahead just a little
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  slightly, I believe she said to the left, the bullet probably would have
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  hipped. It probably would have healed. So I just I think God for
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  that, you know, I think app Hold, we have a comment terror
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  artists, for any man told a woman as a coward. Absolutely, and
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  then too, you have to take into consideration terror artists. It's not just
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  men. You have women that are physically abusive to men. I have seen
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  cases. I know somebody personally and she was mentally abusive to her. You
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  know, she she belittled her husband. She made her husband feel like he
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  was less than a man because she made more money than him. She told
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  her, old, my job is better than yours. You'll never amount to
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  what I'm doing right now. So it's not I want people to understand,
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  it's not just men, but it's women that are physically and mentally abusive.
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  You know what I'm saying. And you know husband and white boyfriend and girlfriend.
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  You know mothers. You know, parents could be abusive to their children.
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  So don't think that domestic is just you know, husband and white boyfriend
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  and girlfriend. But you know, bugs do it to their children, fathers
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  doing to their children. You know, it's it's it's it's a well rounded
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  type of thing, you know, So it's not just that. So since
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  this leads me into the next question, you know, one of the things
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  that don't discuss. What are the sign of domestic abuse? You tell me,
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  what do you what? What a science is? Let me tell you
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  it starts off pat clean, but when it starts getting to the point when
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  it becomes verbally abusive, Okay, I'm gonna eventually lead to being You're gonna
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  become mentally abused, and then that's going to look into those are the signs.
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  It's gonna eventually get to the point where my thing, she can do
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  another thing, and then it's that's it, it's do it. It just
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  definitely the signs first, but it's just a verbal abuse or some people just
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  come up to So let me let me kind of pick it back off what
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  you're saying. So, what are the signs of domestic abuse? Mm hmm.
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  I'm pulling together tonight, I promise i'm'a pull it together tonight. So
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  what are the signs when they start to talk about how your dress, that's
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  a sign. Oh that outfit makes you look too fat. Oh that outfit
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  makes you look too skinny. Oh you don't look like Tyra Bays with that
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  dress all. I don't know what the hell made you put that damn dress
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  off. That's a sign, you know, if they the least little thing
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  you'll say to them set them off. They may not hit you, but
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  if they raise their hands too at you, that's a sign of abuse.
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  That that's a sign because it's about to escalate from now he's gone or she
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  has gone from being mentally and emotionally abuse. It to you that now I'm
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  raising my hands to you, or I'm threatening you, or I'm telling you
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  you keep playing, I'm gonna kick your ass. If you don't do what
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  I tell you to do, I'm gonna slap the shit out of you.
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  That's the signs, you know. Listen to what they say, Listen to
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  how they speak to you, Listen to how they are when you're around.
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  Are they belittling to you? You know that that's the sign. You know,
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  that's definitely a sign, you know, and then sometimes you know,
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  we see those signs and we chalked it up like, Oh, he's not
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  gonna do anything, or she's not gonna do anything. Oh he's just talking,
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  she's just talking. No. No, the first time that they raised
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  their hands to you, you need to get the hell on down the road
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  exactly, exactly. Don't wait him around, because that's I think it escalates.
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  He feels like he can do it one time and you come back,
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  he's gonna do it the second time. So sis, let me ask you.
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  And I know you was domestic to go, So I want you to
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  tell me a story. How did you too? Me? Okay? So
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  I was sixteen when I met him, sixteen fifteen, sixteen when I met
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  him, we met through a friend his well, his cousin was my friend.
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  So he was like, oh, yeah, you're I'm okay with my
• 17:48
  cousin. So I was like, alright, cool, you know whatever.
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  So we started talking like we were talking on the phone. We were young.
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  So when I got up, so, you know, sixteen, we
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  got into the relationship. By the time I was seventeen eighteen, I had
• 18:06
  moved him with him and his mom and dad, brothers, sisters. I
• 18:10
  had moved in with a family at this point, right, So he would
• 18:15
  go to jail. But before he went to jail, like he would say,
• 18:19
  oh, you're so stupid dumb, because I literally I dropped out of
• 18:23
  school running behind this dude. I dropped out of school, Yes, I
• 18:30
  did. I was in love. At least I thought I was in love.
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  You know what I'm saying, I'll say that I thought I was in
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  love. So he went to jail. You know, I went back by
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  my mom my house. He got out of jail, I came back.
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  So it went from verbal, so then it became mental and emotion. You
• 18:55
  know, it was you stupid, Oh yeah, I see holes look way
• 18:59
  better than you. You you skinny, don't nobody wants you, your freckle
• 19:03
  face bitch that. It went to that, but I was like, okay,
• 19:07
  well he'll change. He went to jail again. You know, this
• 19:12
  time it was six months. I think it was like five six months.
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  He was the jail, go back by my mama house. My mom was
• 19:21
  like, you know, you do you don't need to go over there,
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  blah blah blah. But you know, I was eighteen at this point.
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  You know, I was going I was like whatever, So my mom was
• 19:26
  like, you know, you do whatever the hell you wanna so he gets
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  out of jail, I go back. I'm running back. It's it's you
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  know, he goes to jail. I go back alive, he get out
• 19:41
  of jail, I go back. So finally this time I stayed. So
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  the first time he hit me, we were at I want to say,
• 19:55
  maybe cousin's house or something. He started he was drinking. M It was
• 20:00
  the very first time he had hit me. So before you continue, effe,
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  did anybody stop him? Oh? His brother was like his brothers,
• 20:11
  you know at the time, they were like, oh, you don't put
• 20:12
  your hands on her. You know what did she do? And you know
• 20:17
  they stopped it. You know, I cried, I left, He apologized,
• 20:21
  I love you, I'm sorry. You know I was drunk, you
• 20:22
  know, blah blah blah. So I forgave it. I went back.
• 20:30
  So I want to show you something. I really want to show you something.
• 20:37
  So the abuse continued. That's me, that's me. Let me let
• 20:48
  me remove that. So you guys, because that's me. I was nineteen
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  years old. I was about ninety seven pounds. That's how much the abuse
• 21:00
  started to take a toll on me. I was so tightly but I love
• 21:07
  this man. But that's me, that's me. So the abuse became so
• 21:17
  overwhelmed that you became strength to the point where you lost a lot of weight.
• 21:22
  Right, I couldn't eat. It was like I'm trying to really find
• 21:32
  a word, and that what's the word. I became introvert, I guess,
• 21:44
  so to say. And that dick that I took that picture that night
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  he wore my ass. Okay, So another thing, another sign of abuse.
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  Did any at any point he tried to isolate you from your family,
• 22:03
  Oh yeah, my friends. I used to work at McDonald's and he would
• 22:11
  come to my job and he will said in my job, I would say
• 22:17
  things like if I saw a guy, and I would be like, oh
• 22:22
  I like his shirt, go be with that, niggad and go be with
• 22:25
  him then, And all I said was I like the shirt. So I
• 22:30
  got to a point where when we were gold places, I would just stay
• 22:33
  quiet. I would just kind of sit there, what's wrong with you?
• 22:37
  Ask old nothing because I didn't want to do anything to provoke him. So
• 22:45
  yeah, absolutely, that night, looking at if I go back and I
• 22:49
  look at that picturess, he would miss that night, he sure did.
• 22:57
  I remember that day, and I think a lot of men do that because
• 23:03
  they want to feel I think it comes from a former intimidation of a woman
• 23:07
  too. I think some of them feel if they can't take advantage of nobody
• 23:14
  else, so they tried to do it to them. They wouldn't know me
• 23:17
  how it loves she is with you. You know, you would a woman
• 23:21
  who loved your dirty drawn and you take advantage of her doing something like that
• 23:26
  to make you feel power. But it's more like if I can't let nobody
• 23:30
  else can, they ain't gonna want you with two black guys. And he
• 23:36
  used to tell me that, or if you leave me, nobody's ever gonna
• 23:38
  want you. Look at you, you know, you know I got to
• 23:42
  keep putting this picture up because he made me feel like I was worthless.
• 23:48
  You know, I thought I believe that. You know, look how small
• 23:51
  I was. Nobody nobody wanted a little bit ass woman like that. You
• 23:55
  know I was nineteen in that picture, you know I was. I was
• 24:00
  ninety seven pounds, ninety eight pounds, I was something. I was under
• 24:03
  one hundred pounds at that picture. I was under a hundred pounds in that
• 24:08
  picture. You know what I'm saying, Hold up, we gotta comment.
• 24:15
  That's my brother, y'all. He says, I will never do my black
• 24:19
  queen like that. I know, and that's right. Some men don't know
• 24:26
  what they have. So some men don't know what a queen is. Instead,
• 24:33
  they're trying to make you feel small. So we appreciate that coming.
• 24:37
  We appreciate that coming because something do not know the meaning of having a quickment
• 24:44
  a good woman. And looking back at that picture and looking at me today,
• 24:56
  you know, I just I just don't believe it would have made me
• 25:03
  the woman I have stay. I really don't. It was hard. It's
• 25:12
  hard for me to look at that picture today and to know and to think
• 25:22
  like any moment that he laid his hands on you, it could have been
• 25:29
  your legs. So the first time, women, you you please to me,
• 25:36
  because it may not be next time. You may not get a chance
• 25:38
  to walk out that situation. You may not get a chance to tell someone
• 25:45
  you know. So let me ask you when right right? And I think
• 25:57
  men you mean other women who have friends who are abusive, no matter what
• 26:03
  it is, or men who are abusive. I think the friends around him
• 26:07
  who would call him out on that absolutely, and and and that and that
• 26:12
  goes back to you know, yeah, you were ten or eleven years old,
• 26:18
  sins when it happened. So you were young, so you you didn't
• 26:23
  know what to do, you know what I'm saying, to do. So
• 26:26
  it was like you were helpless in that situation. But there were people,
• 26:33
  you know, in my situation, people stood around and they watched him do
• 26:37
  this. They watched him do this. You know what I'm saying, Old,
• 26:41
  we got one more. Hey, you're absolutely right for artists, protect
• 26:51
  our black kings at all costs. Absolutely and and you know what the nest
• 26:56
  day and age we're not protect didn't you know, you know what I'm saying.
• 27:00
  We're so disrespected. You know, black women, we are so disrespected.
• 27:07
  And you know, as we go on, you know, as I
• 27:11
  continue to you know, you know, go on my journey and share my
• 27:14
  stories, I definitely want to, you know, uplift each and every black
• 27:19
  woman. You know, I making uplift everybody. But I'm gonna do the
• 27:23
  best that I can do because I want you to understand that you are worthy.
• 27:30
  You know that you are appreciated. You know, me, during that
• 27:33
  time, I didn't feel work, you know, I was depressed, you
• 27:37
  know, I you know, and looking back at it, it was a
• 27:45
  lesson learned. I really don't want to say a lesson learned, but now
• 27:51
  I don't what to look for. Yeah, so at that point, you
• 27:55
  know not to be in a relationship with somebody who would do that to you.
• 28:00
  And that's what I saying. Being around people who I say, go
• 28:03
  through that, it taught me a listen, it taught me. Okay,
• 28:07
  when you start doing that, then you see that before you don't want to
• 28:11
  take that ship. But it's easier said and done. Some women just tell
• 28:15
  me. Some women are said, or some women don't know where to go.
• 28:21
  You know who they can talk to because at this point, he didn't
• 28:23
  isolated you from all your family. You know, you know they feel like
• 28:29
  you can't come back because I told you so with all I did this no
• 28:36
  over support. But it's like it's so, you know, when I tell
• 28:45
  people, it's easier said than done. Right, It's easy to tell somebody
• 28:52
  to leave, but when this person has made you feel this big, you're
• 29:00
  scared to go because they made you feel like nobody's ever gonna want you.
• 29:06
  Nobody, you know, ain'tbody gonna love you're like me? Ain't nobody gonna
• 29:10
  want you look at how you look. I remember a time because I'm an
• 29:15
  asthmatic. I remember a time I had asthma tech and he left me in
• 29:18
  the street. I remember another time I was going home to go see my
• 29:30
  mom. I was getting on the bus and he beat me up at the
• 29:34
  bus stop toward my shirt. He spit on me. I had to get
• 29:40
  on the bus right like, but that wasn't enough to make me leave.
• 29:48
  Was it just that you were scared or it was just more of your your
• 29:53
  what within the relationship okay? Or you know I love it just that much
• 30:00
  Tuesday, it was a mix of all three. And even if you go
• 30:07
  back to my first episode and I talked about I had never seen what it
• 30:15
  was like for a man to love a woman, So I didn't know.
• 30:22
  I didn't grow up in a situation where my father was healthy to my mother,
• 30:26
  you know, or ever see my mom in a healthy relationship. My
• 30:30
  mom was in one healthy relate was in I really wouldn't call it healthy because
• 30:36
  my mom dated this man for like two years and then come to find out
• 30:38
  he was married. But he was good to me and my sister, like
• 30:42
  he was a father figure. You know what, I'm saying it was it
• 30:51
  says, please encourage our young ladies to value themselves despite what their circumstances.
• 30:56
  Maybe at the time, and you're absolutely correct, Gary, you know,
• 30:59
  but me eighteen nineteen, I didn't know that around you. So I honestly
• 31:07
  did not know what it was like for a man to level one. I
• 31:10
  didn't know. I did not know, you know. And like I said,
• 31:15
  if I look back, knowing what I know then, knowing what I
• 31:18
  know now, had I known then, or I would have left the moment
• 31:22
  he told me I was stupid, the moment he told me I was ugly,
• 31:26
  I would have left. Then I would be bitch, gets the fuck
• 31:30
  on, you know. That's that's how it would have been, you know.
• 31:34
  But you know, because I never had that around you know, my
• 31:38
  brothers who are abusive to their girlfriends. You know, that's all I saw,
• 31:47
  you know, And then nobody. I felt like nobody cared because they
• 31:51
  would see him do this, Like I remember one time he jumped on me
• 31:55
  in the front yard of his mama's house. His daddy came out and his
• 32:04
  daddy stopped it. That was the day he beat me up at the bus
• 32:07
  stope because I was trying to leave. He had tore my shirt, Like
• 32:14
  I said, he spit on me. My nails were broke. I had
• 32:17
  to and I had a start of jacket that I had to put on because
• 32:21
  I didn't have another shirt to put on. He had tore my shirt.
• 32:23
  I had to ride the bus on like that. This is making me angry
• 32:28
  and I don't love everybody could see because I feel like my eye twit you
• 32:30
  like I want to fight him, right, You're no woman desires that like
• 32:36
  and that then that's embarrassing you out here and you treating me it doesn't matter.
• 32:40
  While I man, you used to not be treating a woman like a
• 32:43
  piece of paper. You would here treating me like trash. You spit me
• 32:47
  like like trash. But you know, he grew up like that. His
• 32:55
  daddy used to beat on his mom like, so he just mimiced what he
• 33:02
  saw. You know, his dad was abusive to his mom, so he
• 33:06
  was like that. And even the woman he got with after me, he
• 33:10
  was jumping on her. Let me tell you something, ladies, let me
• 33:15
  tell you something. I can't say what I would have done, but you
• 33:22
  either you get help, so you shoot the nigga. Okay, I mean
• 33:30
  yeah, but you know it's it's hard. It all depends because you know,
• 33:35
  it's all the pool self defense, you know that, especially when it's
• 33:42
  when it's black. When we're black, yeah, you know, but a
• 33:45
  black woman or but see, I think it would be harder to cruise if
• 33:50
  you were a black man getting abused. That's where the did they come in
• 33:59
  there? You who have a better chance as a woman saying I shot him
• 34:02
  in self defense because he was abusing me. I mean, let's look at
• 34:08
  Marissa Alexander. I believe that's her name, the lady in Florida whose baby
• 34:14
  daddy was jumping on her. She didn't shoot him. She shot in the
• 34:19
  air. She fired a warning shot, and they arrested her black lady for
• 34:25
  endangering others. I want to I forgot what the charge was, but because
• 34:30
  our children were upstairs in the bed sleep but her baby daddy was jumping on
• 34:36
  her. I believe she's out of jail now. But this happened about maybe,
• 34:43
  oh it was a baby five years ago. I know her last Alexander,
• 34:50
  But it was in Florida, and she didn't shoot him. She shot
• 34:52
  in the air, and then the baby daddy admitted that he was jumping on
• 34:58
  her, but they still arrested. She went to jail. They try to
• 35:00
  give this later twenty years. I wish she wouldn't have miss but I'm not
• 35:08
  being it just like don't you love me? I just you want to protect
• 35:16
  yourself as a woman, a man with so much strength. You're helpless at
• 35:22
  this point, and I'm not encouraged anybody to just be like, you know
• 35:27
  what, I'm helpless. I'm like to go to shooting it gets some help
• 35:30
  first, get reach out for help, reach out to anybody, because for
• 35:38
  what my sister here telling me, my eye just don't want to stop twitching
• 35:45
  because I'm just that ain't with for he that you have to endure that nobody
• 35:51
  shouldn't have to go through to just spit on be only front of everybody.
• 36:00
  So what was the oops? There will go? That's that's what I was
• 36:10
  trying to put up because that'll that will lead us into absolutely So what are
• 36:20
  the triggers? What provokes a person? What triggers a person? And my
• 36:27
  situation, alcohol was his trigger. Drugs was his trigger that would set him
• 36:35
  off if he had a bad day, if he wants to work and came
• 36:38
  home and had a bad day, I had a bad d If he had
• 36:45
  a bad day, actually had a bad DJ. I had a bad day.
• 36:52
  Absolutely So drugs, alcohol and his move was the trigger for him too.
• 37:00
  Okay, okay, So you know I hadn't, Like I said,
• 37:06
  I haven't experienced that because I'm not sure what what goes on, and I
• 37:13
  thank god? But how many times were he triggered? So how many times
• 37:22
  did you have this situation? I don't even think I have enough fingers or
• 37:37
  enough hands to even tell you. You know, if I could be at
• 37:43
  work, and you know, of course I didn't have a car, he
• 37:45
  didn't have a car. So if I told him a while I was getting
• 37:49
  off at ten o'clock and he was outside the job waiting on me at ten
• 37:52
  o'clock and it was ten fifteen when I walked out the door, he goes,
• 38:01
  you know, if I went to the store, where the fuck you
• 38:07
  went? It? Don't take that. The souldiers around the corner, every
• 38:12
  little thing I did, you know, it was a trucker. If I
• 38:15
  breathe a wrong way, it was a trucker. So I can't just really
• 38:20
  pinpoint, but I do know alcohol and drugs played a major part. You
• 38:23
  know, there were things that I didn't know, like he was I knew
• 38:28
  he was alcoholic. I knew that, but then it I came to find
• 38:34
  out that he was on cocaine. He used to smoke. Sure when you
• 38:39
  know clicker juice, you know, as we used to call it back in
• 38:43
  the day, that was we dipped an involvement fluid. That's you know what
• 38:47
  we dip in one involvement fluid. He used to smoke thing like embalming fluid
• 38:53
  that they used for people. He would dip his weed in it. He
• 39:01
  would dip his cigarettes in it. I remember one day his brother had to
• 39:06
  go get him because he was in the middle of the street rolling. So
• 39:14
  all those times you still made it out. Did you ever get to the
• 39:17
  point where you thought like this was gonna be your your last time? Every
• 39:22
  time, life, every time, every time, so over the time,
• 39:30
  did the beatings become worse than the last even though they're all What I'm saying
• 39:37
  is, you know something, they get so aggressive, like they just get
• 39:40
  angry and they just really put all they might go to us. Did you
• 39:46
  ever feel like, Okay, this was worse than the last time. This
• 39:51
  was worse than the last time. It was a couple of times up in
• 39:54
  the hospital. He beat me to the point where I had asked him attack.
• 40:05
  I told him he left me in the street and then he's got to
• 40:17
  give me a more to give to the more. H h. He had
• 40:50
  beat me so bad that I had asked my tack had a seizure m HM.
• 41:00
  And his brother's girlfriend at the time was trying to help me, and
• 41:05
  he told her, no leave me. That I told her, stupid ass,
• 41:08
  don't fucking come out of here, was all he could say. Ye.
• 41:20
  An ambulance told him, and they not a call. I probably would
• 41:22
  have died. But that still wasn't enough for me. To me, it
• 41:31
  wasn't enough. Of course, I didn't feel worthy. But when I finally
• 41:42
  did must up the courage to leave, he almost killed me that night.
• 41:51
  So where was your lasting stroke? But that day I forgot what we were
• 42:02
  doing that day, but he was in the kitchen cooking along sister. Wait
• 42:16
  a minute, hey, ro So he was in the kitchen cooking, and
• 42:36
  I forgot what I was doing. But I think we had argued that day,
• 42:43
  and uh, I remember he yelled at me, said something to me.
• 42:47
  So I had turned to come out of the kitchen table. I'm trying
• 43:00
  to get my thoughts together. So I had turned to come out of the
• 43:04
  kitchen and he was in the kitchen. He was burling some water, he
• 43:08
  was making some noodles, and all I remember because it felt like somebody had
• 43:16
  hit me in the in the face with a bag of nails. He had
• 43:23
  taken that pot of water. I think I was I was I was trying
• 43:28
  to leave or something I was doing, but he took that pot of water,
• 43:32
  that burling water, and threw it on me. I just remember falling
• 43:45
  to the floor, a balled up in the night. What could I do?
• 44:02
  The police were called, police came. They didn't arrest him that night.
• 44:14
  They say, oh, we don't see any marks on you. So
• 44:17
  just because they didn't see any marks, that did impromt for arrest. He
• 44:23
  wasn't arrested that night, so I had called my own girl to come and
• 44:31
  pick me up. I just remember waking up the next day. All this
• 44:50
  was burned, my face, my neck, my arm at first degree birds
• 44:57
  on my face and my neck at a second reburn on my all. My
• 45:04
  eye was swollen shut. By this time, my face has swollen. It
• 45:08
  thought it was swollen. I had to go to my mom's job. Like
• 45:15
  that, I went sold my mom. So I went to my mom's job.
• 45:27
  My mom said, don't come upstairs. I had sunglasses on because I
• 45:29
  couldn't see. My eye was swollen shut literally. So my little cousin came
• 45:35
  and came for the pick me up and he took me to the optimologist.
• 45:38
  Is where I had to go to. Doctor told me, says too stolen,
• 45:44
  and tell her she's gonna be blind or not too soon. We have
• 45:53
  to wait for the swelling to go down. That happened July twenty second,
• 46:02
  nineteen ninety nine. I remember that day. Every day. It rules around
• 46:08
  I think about it. So the police arrested. He was not arrested until
• 46:15
  July thirtieth, nineteen ninety nine. That's the arrest record bo arrest record.
• 46:29
  They are charged him with aggravated assault. It might be a little smaller on
• 46:34
  the screen, so I don't know what people could really see. But July
• 46:37
  twenty second, nineteen ninety nine, that he did unlawfully and intentionally and knowingly
• 46:45
  caused seriously bodily injury to ash lipids by throwing scalding water on the complaint,
• 46:54
  which is me. So I went to the police station. By this time,
• 47:06
  the skin on my face was starting up heill long, so one side
• 47:09
  of my face was pink, the other side was brown. Right, and
• 47:15
  I wouldn't go anywhere. I stayed in the house. I didn't want anybody
• 47:21
  to see any like that. I didn't want anybody to see my face.
• 47:25
  I looked horrible. I was so ugly. They arrested him. They called
• 47:35
  me, They say he's been arrested. You would I thought at that point
• 47:40
  I would have felt some kind of relief. I didn't real I was mad
• 47:47
  at myself for calling the police on him. I'm not ashamed to say that
• 47:55
  I was because I loved it. At least I thought I did. At
• 48:02
  least I thought I was in love. So I went to the jail to
• 48:06
  go see him twice. I went, if you don't mind the accent,
• 48:17
  They at concerned at all. No, it was just I can't believe you
• 48:27
  did this to me. You know I didn't do that till you on purpose.
• 48:30
  You know it was an accident, he still had. I knew it
• 48:37
  was an accident. Now you know that I'm older, and you know,
• 48:43
  and and now that I look back and revisit the situation, I knew it
• 48:47
  was an accident, but he still had that power over me because he was
• 48:54
  facing thirty years. So me, I went to the district attorney, told
• 49:06
  him, how they want to file charges, So what made you do it?
• 49:16
  Because he made me feel bad for doing it again, he still had
• 49:23
  that control. He still had that power over me. He still had that
• 49:29
  control. You know, who goes to see somebody in jail after they have
• 49:36
  assaulted you. But I went. He said, you got to write a
• 49:42
  letter to the district attorney and tell him you don't want to file charges.
• 49:47
  So I went, I wrote the letter. But at that point the district
• 49:52
  attorney told me, he said, it's not up to you anymore. It's
• 49:54
  up to the state. M hm. It was out of my hands.
• 50:05
  It wasn't up to me. It was up to the state now because this
• 50:08
  was a felony. This was felony animated assault because us to burning water on
• 50:15
  me. So I guess the state decided not to pursue the charges. He
• 50:22
  only did ninety days and jailing me got out, so if he got out
• 50:29
  content, No, that was a part of my life. I wanted to
• 50:36
  forget. That was a part of my e I knew then it may not
• 50:40
  have been the next time. It may not have been next time. So
• 50:51
  I went on with my life. I went on with my life. I
• 50:57
  went to beauty school. That was the very first picture I took when the
• 51:05
  scars healed. That was my very first picture. Looks good too. I
• 51:15
  still have the scar on my own, but I weever like a badge of
• 51:22
  honor. I don't look at myself as I look at myself, and I
• 51:31
  was a survivor because I made it. That picture right there, I felt
• 51:40
  so beautiful. I slowly started to game way back because I was out of
• 51:53
  that situation. And a couple of years after I took that picture, I
• 52:01
  had my son and I was the greatest gift God could have ever given me.
• 52:15
  But I look at that picture, I look at that smile. I
• 52:17
  was so happy that day for the first time, I really actually that beautiful.
• 52:29
  For the first time, I was free. I was free. I
• 52:36
  was finally free. I didn't look back. I never went back. Never.
• 52:46
  So that picture right there was my role to recover damn day and a
• 52:57
  young lady that did my have. She made me feel so good. I
• 53:07
  don't know she's watching for Casina. Thank you, Monica. Thank you for
• 53:16
  coming to get me that night. But that picture, baby is gorgeous,
• 53:29
  you see. And there's a lot of women who will constantly go through these
• 53:31
  things and do not make it out. They do it out. So with
• 53:37
  me, you made me to tell your story. I just don't know to
• 53:44
  get help. Will you see the signs? Make that a sign for you
• 53:50
  to leave, because it's gonna only get worse. And I didn't know,
• 53:55
  you know, I wanted to leave. And I think my mom knew.
• 54:00
  Well, of course she knew, but she didn't say anything because she just
• 54:04
  she knew I was just gonna go right back. She knew I was,
• 54:10
  and I didn't want to face my mind because I didn't want to hear that.
• 54:13
  I told you so good, right, So when I tell you,
• 54:21
  I hit the ground and I took off run it. I never looked back.
• 54:27
  I wear I wear that like I see my store. Let me see
• 54:30
  if you see it. But I wear it like a bad jar left all
• 54:38
  that's left. I wear it like a bad jar'm because some women don't even
• 54:47
  live long enough to tell their story. And knowing you know, knowing what
• 54:53
  I know now, I believe if I would have stayed, I probably wouldn't
• 54:59
  be here to day to tell my story, you know. And I just
• 55:07
  I really didn't want to do this episode tonight. I really didn't. Wow,
• 55:15
  the one person that I'm looking at on this screen encouraged me to tell
• 55:22
  my story because I could potentially be helping somebody else. Somebody may have the
• 55:30
  same story, somebody may have a loved one that shares the same story.
• 55:39
  But I thank God every day that he brought me out of that storm.
• 55:44
  He brought me out of that situation. I thank God every day because it
• 55:50
  could have been worse. Like I said, who knows, it could have
• 55:54
  been hot water today. He could have been stabbed me the next, he
• 56:00
  could have been shooting me the next. You know, feelable tomorrow. So
• 56:07
  again, I hope this story touches as many women as possible who's been going
• 56:15
  through this. You don't be afraid to reach out inbox if you feel like
• 56:22
  we need to talk. Embark but girl interrupted or actually pitch BGI as your
• 56:31
  connect right there. If the encouragement that is your encouragement. She's on Instagram
• 56:37
  and faithbook, but girl into what if we want to talk to send me
• 56:46
  a message embox me. I don't have much but if you need a place
• 56:54
  to lay your head for a couple of days, I opened my body.
• 57:01
  I don't want to see another woman or another man killed at the hands of
• 57:08
  their mate. Miss Maggie T is requesting to be added to the stream.
• 57:16
  Okay, so did you? Can you sender the link? Yeah? What
• 57:30
  was going? Maggie? Sender the link? We have our sister coming in.
• 57:43
  Let's see and like everybody had a story, it doesn't have to be
• 57:51
  physical. You know, domestic violence starts off in mid ways. Ye'll take
• 57:58
  it to the science. Do not ignore the signs. Ignoring the signs not
• 58:08
  necessarily get here to staying the story. But while we on a quick why
• 58:16
  relate it for Maggie, I'm Keisha a Kesious Corner and I'm actually looking for
• 58:27
  me black women slish thing with me two weeks to slide it. We're gonna
• 58:36
  talk about businesses. This is why we talked to up women other businesses.
• 58:42
  I want to have expreen or all black women entrepreneurs. So you are interested
• 58:52
  sending me an email at Keshia's Corner Katie s H s k R R an
• 58:59
  R and Gmail dot com. Were you able to were you able to get
• 59:10
  Okay, I'm just waiting. So while we're waiting on our sister, let's
• 59:20
  talk about the ways to get out. We touched on too. Like I
• 59:24
  said, if you or somebody you know is in a domestic abuse relationship,
• 59:30
  please don't hesitate to send me a message. If you yourself are in a
• 59:36
  domestic violence relationship and you just need someone to lay your head for a couple
• 59:39
  of days, my door is open. I know it's easier said than done,
• 59:47
  but I'm here to tell you it does not get any better. There
• 59:54
  would go do leave if you have to. Oh there's that's hey. Hey,
• 1:00:06
  how's my sound? Can you hear me? Every good? No echoes,
• 1:00:09
  no, nothing, cause I'm on my phone today, so you'll sound
• 1:00:14
  good. How are you tonight? I'm good. I kind of wanted to
• 1:00:16
  get in this conversation because this is a good one, so I definitely wanted
• 1:00:21
  to join in on it. I know you guys CEB on Fridays with the
• 1:00:29
  corner right there, miss Casee, but I also wanted to get in here
• 1:00:32
  too, on your conversation. Absolutely, thank you, sis. Do you
• 1:00:39
  have a story, so I guess what it is? Domestic violence and things
• 1:00:47
  like that. I don't have a domestic violence where I was physically hurt.
• 1:00:58
  I've always going through mental you know, of you definitely, that's something I've
• 1:01:07
  always dealt with. I've always had someone that put me down, make me
• 1:01:13
  feel like I'm no good. And of course I knew friends close close friends
• 1:01:19
  that definitely goes to this domestic violence. And whether it's physical, emotional anything,
• 1:01:28
  it's hard to get out of that situation. It's like I've held onto
• 1:01:35
  my relationship too long most of the time because I'm thinking, oh, I
• 1:01:39
  need to be together for the kids. I need to do this. I
• 1:01:45
  thought about them more than my happiness. And when that happens, and when
• 1:01:54
  that happens, you just you lose yourself. Yeah, yeah, you do.
• 1:02:02
  You know so, I, like I said, I've been separated.
• 1:02:06
  Of course we're working it out. But you know, I'm not gonna say
• 1:02:09
  you know too much about it because I know he don't really watch anyway.
• 1:02:15
  But still you never know who else I was mentally broken down for the past,
• 1:02:22
  starting like in it started around mayish, Like I said, my daughter
• 1:02:29
  was going through her own mental thing and things like that. Of course,
• 1:02:31
  Mama trying to hold herself together. Now you got the one that's not behind
• 1:02:37
  you. You know, as soon as we cause an argument and have an
• 1:02:42
  argument, it's just like, you know, you poured fingers at me and
• 1:02:45
  making me out to be just the bad guy, the bad guy, unstable
• 1:02:54
  and things like that. But it's like, you know what I go through.
• 1:02:58
  You know, I go through anxiety and things like. I don't take
• 1:03:00
  any medication for it. I may take my you know, herbal medication for
• 1:03:06
  it, but I try to just deal because I have to be a mother
• 1:03:13
  and at the end of the day, to my own that's going through it.
• 1:03:16
  So it's like when somebody is bringing you all the way down, it's
• 1:03:20
  just sometimes you settle for it and you just deal with it and you go
• 1:03:24
  back to it. And that's that's that's my issue. I keep taking myself
• 1:03:30
  back. So let me ask you this this, why do you ease is
• 1:03:39
  not healthy for you? Why do you see because it's love? You just
• 1:03:46
  feel like you you think that you're feeling love, and you feel because you
• 1:03:52
  think about the good times. It's like, there's not always bad days,
• 1:03:57
  so you think about It's like sometimes people like that can manipulate you too,
• 1:04:02
  you know, say the right things, you don't remove yourself all the ways,
• 1:04:06
  like, oh, I'm done with this situation. They just know what
• 1:04:09
  the right things to say, the right you know, to pull your back
• 1:04:13
  in, to pull you back in, you know, So go ahead.
• 1:04:19
  Do you honestly think he's gonna change? I want to believe it. We're
• 1:04:30
  supposed to be going to counseling and things like that, but you know,
• 1:04:33
  money is tight right about now, these kids going back to school back and
• 1:04:38
  forth, the holidays are coming up, so I actually haven't even going to
• 1:04:42
  my own therapy sessions at this moment, you know, I mean, kids
• 1:04:46
  come first. I gotta make sure you take it at that. That's one
• 1:04:48
  thing about everybody suggests therapy and therapy and therapy, even with insurance, you
• 1:04:56
  gotta be able to afford it too. Absolutely, Because okay, so what
• 1:05:01
  if YouTube we're to sit down and have a conversation if you know the problem,
• 1:05:08
  if you YouTube know the problem specifically, you think it would be a
• 1:05:13
  civil conversation where he can sit down and address that without someone telling him,
• 1:05:17
  Okay, this is where you're wrong. Yeah, we're definitely. Like I
• 1:05:21
  said, it's not all bad right down, like I said, because that's
• 1:05:24
  why I wasn't on this week because of course we try to do our little
• 1:05:28
  date night thing and you know, because we're trying to work through it.
• 1:05:31
  It's like he's not physically abusive or he doesn't go out and cheat anything like
• 1:05:36
  that, but it's just certain things that I just don't feel that he comes
• 1:05:41
  through on. When it comes to finances and things like that, and his
• 1:05:45
  understanding of my own daughter with her issues. It always that's a teenager thing
• 1:05:50
  and that's that's nothing. And because I've made yes, yeah, just kind
• 1:05:57
  of takes his way out. You know. His thing is I don't want
• 1:06:00
  to argue. I just rather walk away from it, and that's me dealing
• 1:06:04
  with it. No, I don't and I don't like to argue, but
• 1:06:10
  I'm definitely coming to you because you need to hear what I have to say.
• 1:06:14
  I hate argument people, but when I feel that you're unattached, of
• 1:06:18
  course I'm gonna get more defensive and a little bit more angrier. Then if
• 1:06:21
  it comes into something more, then we're shouting and words are going and then
• 1:06:26
  it's like, well, I didn't mean that, but it's like sometimes maybe
• 1:06:29
  you do mean that, and once and when it when it's time to say
• 1:06:34
  fail to realize that once those words leave your mouth, you can't take it
• 1:06:40
  back. You can't put it back like that, you can't ring a doorbell
• 1:06:46
  absolutely for me for a while, like you said what you say. So,
• 1:06:51
  But since I want you to know, even though it's not physical,
• 1:06:59
  it's emotionally because he's gotten you to the point where you putting you're putting him
• 1:07:11
  before your children, and I don't want to see. You are beautiful,
• 1:07:20
  you are gorgeous. I'm not gonna cry put you awards so much more.
• 1:07:29
  I'm telling you I've I've gotten stronger, though I'm telling you I used to.
• 1:07:31
  I'm I'm telling if you knew, if you talk to me back in
• 1:07:34
  May, I was no good. I wasn't sleeping. Well, I'm still
• 1:07:39
  having issues with sleeping a little bit of getting better with it. But I'm
• 1:07:42
  telling you I wasn't eating, and everybody knows I'm already naturally thin. Yeah,
• 1:07:46
  and for me to not even want to eat, I was extremely extremely
• 1:07:50
  depressed. Trying to deal with me and did with my you know what's going
• 1:07:55
  on because my son, he's artistic, so he has his season and his
• 1:07:59
  is you know, he's actually got to go to a neurologist Thursday, because
• 1:08:03
  he's getting older, so his seizures are coming frequently, and he's he's none
• 1:08:10
  verbal, so it's like, not only I'm dealing with one person with a
• 1:08:14
  disability. Now my daughter has been diagnosed with something. So it's like,
• 1:08:18
  sometimes I feel like I am completely alone in this, you know, but
• 1:08:25
  you're not. Don't ever feel like you have a whole sister circle. Although
• 1:08:32
  miles separate me and you, you got a whole sister right here in Houston.
• 1:08:40
  You're not alone, and you got in Atlanta. So don't you ever
• 1:08:46
  ever feel like you got to walk this role by yourself. You got two
• 1:08:51
  sisters right here on the live with you that's willing to walk on each side
• 1:08:56
  of you, not behind you, not in front of you, but next
• 1:09:00
  to you. You're not You're not You're not on this struggle. You're not
• 1:09:03
  in the struggle alone. We all on this rule to recovery, and we
• 1:09:08
  walk a hand the head. When we feel like you falling, the two
• 1:09:15
  people on the side we're supposed to pick you up. Right. That's why
• 1:09:17
  I'm walking a mind because I got your back, you know, like I
• 1:09:23
  got on the side. I got her right side because guess what, when
• 1:09:27
  you fall, I can push her right on backup. So, but you
• 1:09:30
  know how it is. We all. You know, I'm pretty sure you
• 1:09:33
  go through it too. You'd rather just suffer in silence. You'd rather keep
• 1:09:39
  it to yourself. You'd rather just not say, well, these things are
• 1:09:42
  going on in my life, you know what I'm saying. Of course,
• 1:09:45
  you want to just look rocket, you know, look perfect to other people.
• 1:09:49
  But I'm learning marriage is not easy. No, marriage is definitely not
• 1:09:56
  easy, especially if you didn't go through that counseling. Right before I heard,
• 1:10:02
  I heard and we opt out of that. Two keys sho were just
• 1:10:05
  like, yuh, we'll be right, we'll be fine, we'll talk through
• 1:10:09
  it, we'll communicate. Yeah, because I didn't take it. I didn't
• 1:10:14
  take the company because I felt like, lookay, we've been together long enough,
• 1:10:17
  so we you know, we know. But I'm fortunately to have that
• 1:10:23
  open line of communication. But if there's still some things you gotta work out,
• 1:10:28
  yeah, well cook what everybody? And that's you know, and a
• 1:10:33
  lot of people think that relationships are so easy and they're not. You know,
• 1:10:41
  boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, and he's trying. I'm just
• 1:10:45
  saying, it's like I give him that he's trying, you know. He
• 1:10:48
  we definitely I'm telling him when I came back because I told him we separated
• 1:10:53
  and I was like, I am completely done. But we talked about I
• 1:10:57
  was like, look, in order for us, for us to work out,
• 1:11:00
  we really have to because our issue was communication. So let me ask
• 1:11:05
  you, this was the communication that issue on your end or his end,
• 1:11:10
  it was really we just It's funny because I can talk to anybody else like
• 1:11:15
  it's nothing, you know, But of course I'm not hoping. I'm not
• 1:11:19
  telling everything to everybody. So I felt comfortable talking to other people. And
• 1:11:24
  that's a problem. It's when it's when, like I said, I go
• 1:11:29
  through my anxiety. I'm going through my own issues. I have like some
• 1:11:32
  deep dark things that I went through in my childhood, and like you know,
• 1:11:35
  I came on the show and told you about that those things I still
• 1:11:39
  had struggled with at some point. So finding someone to truly love me and
• 1:11:45
  accept those flaws and things like that and understand that I'm gonna have my ups
• 1:11:49
  and my downs because I'm not taking any medication. I refused to do that.
• 1:11:55
  And if I'm having a bad day, I should babe, it to
• 1:11:59
  reach out to you and talk to you, and you listen and understand.
• 1:12:03
  It's like I've been telling you all of this has been going on. I
• 1:12:06
  told him, I was like, I was extremely depressed, I wasn't eating,
• 1:12:10
  et cetera, and et cetera. And you guess what it's because of
• 1:12:12
  you and the things that's going on around my life. Right about them,
• 1:12:16
  you don't never tell me this, and it just seemed like I'm talking to
• 1:12:19
  a blank walk very dismisses all the time, very dismissess. Going back to
• 1:12:30
  what you just said a moment ago, you wanted somebody to really truly love
• 1:12:34
  you. Does Maggie love Maggie. I I'm trying to. I'm struggled with
• 1:12:42
  that myself, to be real, like, because of the fact that before
• 1:12:48
  him, I mean really honestly, it seems like I've kind of dated the
• 1:12:51
  same person over again. I'm not gonna lie. And first person was just
• 1:12:58
  like pretty much made me feel like I wasn't good enough period. Oh and
• 1:13:04
  the person that he left me for throughout this whole relationship, Oh, she's
• 1:13:11
  you know, you know, scholar graduate, you know that type of thing.
• 1:13:16
  But they're they're extremely unhappy. You know, well anything you could sit
• 1:13:23
  up there, you could brag about what you got and all that. Baby
• 1:13:26
  you're not happy, you and that gold girl, you and that gold wait.
• 1:13:32
  I see what I say. I got that gold girl. But it
• 1:13:39
  just seemed like I've always just had to prove myself always, like even my
• 1:13:46
  my parents, and was in con question at times, like you got some
• 1:13:51
  nerve like I can't I'm not protecting my girls and things like that. I
• 1:13:57
  just don't allow just anybody and everybody at my house, Like how kids came
• 1:14:00
  over. Anybody that's gonna come in here. I trust absolutely. If I
• 1:14:08
  have a two story home, my kids are somewhere else. No one is
• 1:14:13
  allowed upstairs. You know what I'm saying. I do have things that if
• 1:14:16
  one thing, no one's gonna be in my home without me being there.
• 1:14:20
  So when you question that type of stuff, well let me know when you're
• 1:14:24
  gonna have a party next so I can come get them. Like what what
• 1:14:26
  does that mean? You don't think I can protect them? Yeah? And
• 1:14:32
  if you know so, it's like you always had an issue with this mean
• 1:14:36
  period And it could be because you you still have doors that are open that
• 1:14:45
  you just keep walking through and you don't close them all the way. But
• 1:14:51
  I want you, as my sister, to close one door at a time,
• 1:14:58
  one door at a time, because I want you to truly heal,
• 1:15:02
  because I want to see you in a real happy place. And I know
• 1:15:09
  it's easier and said than done, but this, this is, like I
• 1:15:11
  told you, this is a journey that we're walking on together. I'm closing
• 1:15:16
  one door at a time and if you need me to come stand with you
• 1:15:20
  at that door that you're trying to close. And we got the chalk and
• 1:15:23
  we got the cuss and cry about we're gonna do that because twenty twenty one,
• 1:15:29
  sis, we can't walk and carrying a baggage, it's weighing you down.
• 1:15:34
  And if you're not healthy to you, you can't be healthy to your
• 1:15:39
  babies. Are You're right? And I definitely felt that I was. I
• 1:15:44
  was definitely no good trying to deal with her being in that facility and I
• 1:15:47
  couldn't talk to her. I'm crying, crying myself to sleep, waiting on
• 1:15:53
  her to call. Then I'm trying to get it together so I can at
• 1:15:56
  least sound like nothing's wrong where I'm talking to her, because she can hear
• 1:16:00
  it and she's like, what's going on, Mom? You're all right?
• 1:16:03
  It's like, no, I'm absolutely good. We're worried about you. Right
• 1:16:06
  man, you get yourself together. But it's like, that's difficult. That's
• 1:16:12
  difficult, trying to hold this self together while your child is fragile, and
• 1:16:15
  then you know, dealing with the emotional abuse from you know, your husband.
• 1:16:20
  And I mean, that's a lot to put on your plate. You
• 1:16:23
  know, that's that's a lot you're trying to eat. You know, I
• 1:16:26
  tell everybody that's almost like Thanksgiving. You know, when you go to somebody,
• 1:16:30
  you know, when you're Thanksgiving and you see all this food out here,
• 1:16:33
  you want to taste everything. You won't the the sweet potatoes, you
• 1:16:38
  won't addressing. You're trying to load your plate up and you can't enjoy it
• 1:16:43
  because you ate so much of it. But the fifth But like I say,
• 1:16:48
  I know right now yours may just be emotional. But that's not to
• 1:16:54
  say it won't turn physical. But I think that's why you have to become
• 1:17:02
  And I know us women, sometimes we we're tired of being strong. But
• 1:17:09
  sometimes you know, when it gets to that point, we have to know
• 1:17:13
  and our mind Hey, I'm not gonna accept this. Like I said,
• 1:17:16
  it's it's hard for me to speak on this subject because I've never been through
• 1:17:20
  it. However I've seen it. From me seeing it, it's taught me
• 1:17:26
  a lot. Okay, I don't want nobody who's gonna treat me like this.
• 1:17:30
  If you like this, and I know what I gotta do. So
• 1:17:34
  I think women we have to pull ourselves together mentally because I think once we
• 1:17:41
  get take mentally everything else humble, everything else humble. It's like the legs
• 1:17:48
  to a table. We don't have no legs that table is done. So
• 1:17:56
  emotional distress starts mentally in us everything else. If we get a man who
• 1:18:06
  say something like me. For instance, growing up, I was called fact,
• 1:18:14
  I was called ugly, all these things, so that mentally its yeah.
• 1:18:23
  So now I believe that I am fat and I am ugly. So
• 1:18:29
  women in that problem for everybody, you have to Like I said, it's
• 1:18:34
  easy to say that because our kids don't always have a saucepot. It's all,
• 1:18:40
  we don't always have the mo mentally, but for as everything else,
• 1:18:45
  I think we have to be mentally strong tooth and have that circle like we
• 1:18:51
  do to where we can call on one another, help help building back up
• 1:18:58
  mentally, you know not. It's just not telling me I'm pretty Oh,
• 1:19:03
  I'm not saying. It's more like, girl, you can get your shit
• 1:19:09
  together. Crowns, your damn crown put it on. Don't you let it?
• 1:19:15
  And I talk about it. Tell you nothing right. I talk to
• 1:19:19
  my friend's day and at this point when I talk to people different and at
• 1:19:25
  this point I'm telling you and I don't care if I hurt your feeling,
• 1:19:30
  that's not gonna work that I'm not gonna You're not gonna let this say.
• 1:19:31
  But you can't do this because a real friend, not to cut your officers,
• 1:19:39
  but a real friend, a real system you ought to be able to
• 1:19:43
  take. If I come and tell you, come on, man, you
• 1:19:45
  need to get your shit together, It's time for you to get's time for
• 1:19:48
  you to come out of that earth place. And and and that goes back
• 1:19:54
  to the conversation I had with my daughter. Holding onto that hurt becomes a
• 1:19:58
  safe place for us. We allow these men to mentally and emotionally abuse us
• 1:20:05
  because well, okay, I'm you know I'm gonna do this, but we
• 1:20:14
  mimic what we've seen you know, I don't know your background with your mommy,
• 1:20:17
  your dad. I don't know if you know that it was their relationship
• 1:20:20
  is there at this point. So it's like you're just kind of going off
• 1:20:29
  with your salt. That's what you were conditioned to see. And that's like,
• 1:20:32
  you know, when I was telling my story earlier today, you know,
• 1:20:36
  I didn't know what it was like for a man to love a woman.
• 1:20:39
  So I thought it was okay for this man to talk to me like
• 1:20:43
  I was beneath him. You know, I should keep this pitch. I
• 1:20:46
  don't know if you're saut, but that's me. That's how that man did
• 1:20:51
  me. I was about ninety seven pounds in that picture and that was before
• 1:21:00
  it got physical. Matter of fact, that was the first time it got
• 1:21:03
  physical that day when I took that picture. So we have as women,
• 1:21:12
  we do have to know that all abuses abuse. It doesn't matter how you
• 1:21:16
  like the pie, whether it's verbal, mental, emotional. Eventually it will
• 1:21:24
  get physical. Yep, it's level. And I understand you love him and
• 1:21:32
  you you know you want to keep it together for the children. But I'm
• 1:21:35
  gonna tell your sis, you need to put your children before that man,
• 1:21:40
  because that man could leave you today and tomorrow and your children are gonna still
• 1:21:44
  be there. I don't know, but tess to believe now they're they're absolutely
• 1:21:47
  time. It's like, it's not the first time I've left and what's completely
• 1:21:51
  done. It's just you know, in the marriage, you just you.
• 1:21:58
  I knew to protect them. I definitely do protect them. I do,
• 1:22:01
  so you know it's about you. You protect you mentally. Let me who
• 1:22:10
  sis? Let me ask you one question, why do you say? Are
• 1:22:15
  you afraid to fail? And I'm feeling m no. I was absolutely content
• 1:22:24
  with because me and doing this pandemic because what it did was it helped me
• 1:22:30
  back for my creativity. Oh so when I was separated, and I'm telling
• 1:22:38
  you, all I thought about was work, work, work, work,
• 1:22:40
  work. That's all I did. I created this brand. I've been just
• 1:22:45
  going hard. So I definitely lived and was like perfect, could fine with
• 1:22:50
  being with nobody. So it's not that I'm afraid of failing and not being
• 1:22:57
  with somebody. It's just I feel like, because we all have been married
• 1:23:03
  like a short time, okay, so I always feel like, at least
• 1:23:10
  try it again. You know, we're still kind of fresh in it.
• 1:23:13
  It's like, let's try it, because you know, you know, everybody's
• 1:23:15
  like, oh, leave and let it go because some things can be fixed.
• 1:23:19
  Absolutely, some things can be fixed, but you gotta give it that
• 1:23:26
  chance first, and then after that it's like, you know what, it's
• 1:23:29
  just not gonna work, you know, And that's a lot that's a problem
• 1:23:33
  because a lot of people get married and what thing go wrong? That's it.
• 1:23:40
  Yeah, It's just like, hey, you know, you didn't go
• 1:23:44
  before God, so at least let it be worth to try. Yeah,
• 1:23:50
  And that's that's pretty much my point at this point. It's just I've definitely
• 1:23:55
  done did it because I'm not gonna lie. I've been dealing with them,
• 1:24:00
  you know, because he's hasn't been that present at some point. But finally
• 1:24:08
  it was like, Okay, you're gonna get married. You gotta be here.
• 1:24:11
  You have to be here. You know your shata signs before you got
• 1:24:16
  married. I saw. I felt No, it was just that I wasn't
• 1:24:21
  ready to I just because I I shocked up before with the first father.
• 1:24:30
  Okay, and that's where I got cheated on and everything else and every you
• 1:24:32
  know, and every all that stuff. I mean, I'm telling a housewife,
• 1:24:36
  I was acting like a housewife before the ring. Okay, buying clothes,
• 1:24:43
  cooking food. You come home, all you gotta do is just lay
• 1:24:45
  adds down. You know what I'm saying. I was doing a little too
• 1:24:48
  much, So I said, never again would I ever allow somebody to live
• 1:24:54
  with me? And then correct, so no, I was like, we
• 1:25:01
  were actually just we're together. But it's like, hmm, I'm nothing to
• 1:25:06
  no longer do do all of that for you, especially if you're not showing
• 1:25:11
  me. So you have to first prove it, and we really did.
• 1:25:14
  We broke it all the way down. We had a long talks, we
• 1:25:17
  hugged, qued all that right before that happened. Because I broke it down
• 1:25:21
  to him. I was like, because you already know I'm quick to leave,
• 1:25:27
  and he knows that. So what it is now is he's also insecure
• 1:25:31
  too, so it's not just it's just not him, it's me. So
• 1:25:38
  it's it's now you have food broken people trying to fix each other exactly.
• 1:25:45
  So he's like, I don't know we're gonna leave again, cause it's like
• 1:25:47
  I was like, you know what, I'm fed up, I'm done and
• 1:25:49
  now I'll be gone. And that's you know what I'm saying, and you
• 1:25:54
  know it's back and forth, That's what I'm saying. So I can't blame
• 1:25:57
  it all on him. I definitely can't. And that's not healthy for either
• 1:26:01
  one. Tog M and I understand, you know when I get it,
• 1:26:05
  you know, like I said, this is you know, domestic violence Awareness
• 1:26:09
  Month, and I get it. But somebody's got to get off that abuse
• 1:26:13
  of psychle somebody's got somebody has to But you you you knew this going into
• 1:26:20
  the marriage, correct, So did you really expect that he was gonna change?
• 1:26:28
  It's you know how it is. Oh, we hope, we pray,
• 1:26:31
  we talked about it. We're gonna work it out. You know how
• 1:26:34
  it is. You probably been there. Yeah, you know I have.
• 1:26:39
  We see this, you know, we see the flags, but we won't
• 1:26:43
  what we won't And and you know what's to the point where we start to
• 1:26:47
  settle m or the mental abuse, the verbal abuse, the physical abuse.
• 1:26:56
  Oh he hit me one time. Oh he's not gonna hit me again.
• 1:27:00
  He called me a bit this time. Oh he oh, he just laying.
• 1:27:02
  We start to make excuses, but they and then again we want to
• 1:27:08
  lose ourselves in this and now it's time for us to stop living in that
• 1:27:11
  in that hole. Mm yeah right, it's not healthy at all. So
• 1:27:19
  let's two people can actually come together. It's possible. Two you can actually
• 1:27:25
  come together and y'all help each other pick up the pieces they don't have to
• 1:27:29
  be. It's called popromise. Absolutely, that balance. Yeah, okay,
• 1:27:38
  instead of you leaving, let's sit here and talk it out. You you
• 1:27:42
  communicate with me more. That's what we really wrong in this relationship. That's
• 1:27:45
  how we fix it. That's both. That's both because I'm dealing with the
• 1:27:50
  abandonment. I just feel like I'm alone. So it's like it's like you're
• 1:27:56
  I don't feel like you're there for me all the time. So I'm used
• 1:28:00
  to being felt abandoned because like I didn't have a real great relationship with my
• 1:28:03
  biological father, my stepfather, when I found out that he wasn't really my
• 1:28:08
  father. He also mistreated me. I mean, I'm not gonna lie.
• 1:28:13
  He mistreated me, and we just me and my twin sister just always wondering
• 1:28:16
  why it was just always such a towards us, but not towards my other
• 1:28:21
  siblings, you know. And so that's what I was kind of grow grew
• 1:28:27
  up on and just like just always being just like men period. So that's
• 1:28:33
  what I was used to, and it just seemed like I've always just attracted
• 1:28:38
  that for some reason because you allow that type of behavior because it's normalized behavior.
• 1:28:45
  That's that's the word. I'm it's normal behavior for you because you this
• 1:28:50
  is what you've seen. So you may not intentionally be looking for these men
• 1:28:57
  that are like you know, stepfather, but they just you all want you
• 1:29:02
  attract, you know, And that's one of the things that we don't like
• 1:29:08
  to except this woman. You know, we all we attract. I've seen
• 1:29:11
  type of man. My father was not in my life, so I look
• 1:29:14
  for somebody to feel their father figures. Accepted the abuse because I wanted to
• 1:29:24
  be loved. But then at some point I was like, you know what,
• 1:29:27
  I got to really store love with me, Like I got to lose
• 1:29:29
  these doors because it's abuse. Shit. I'm older, is I'm old as
• 1:29:33
  mental abuse, I'm older as verbal and I'm old, so I'm not tolerated
• 1:29:40
  anymore now that I science. But I pray for your sis. Yeah you
• 1:29:45
  ever, you got this here, you just started already and y'all way things
• 1:29:50
  though you can come to a conclusion back on track. But you gotta come.
• 1:30:00
  You got to love you. You have got to do I'm talking about
• 1:30:04
  you so much and say, damn you at talk back to you. You
• 1:30:15
  got to encourage yourself. Yeah, and that's that's something you know all women
• 1:30:19
  men were guilty of. You know, we are so cool dependent on somebody
• 1:30:23
  come giving us confirmation. You know, it's almost like, what would you
• 1:30:28
  think? Know? What do you think? Men? We have to start
• 1:30:31
  thinking for us. We have to start loving each other. We need to
• 1:30:33
  get in this mirror. That's our loving ourselves. Because I don't want to
• 1:30:40
  see you ain't nobody hospital because you wouldn't check out, you know what I'm
• 1:30:45
  saying, Because it just became too much for you. I can't even allow
• 1:30:49
  it to happen. That's why I went on to seek therapy. I was
• 1:30:54
  paying a little money when I could. I was like, you know what,
• 1:30:56
  m I'm not gonna be somebody, because how can I take care of
• 1:31:00
  my own When they got me strapped up somewhere in a crazy house and got
• 1:31:06
  all types of medications that you don't even know if you're car don't even need.
• 1:31:12
  That's kind of how it was my daughter. At first, it was
• 1:31:14
  just like you know, she was in the Uh. They finally got a
• 1:31:17
  nice couple of life because unfortunately she does she is diagnosed with something, so
• 1:31:21
  she has to have something. You know, some people just do have that
• 1:31:26
  chemical and balance in their brain. But I was also a long time ago,
• 1:31:30
  I was taking answer the pressants and it made me like a zombie.
• 1:31:33
  Oh yeah, had no kind of life. And you imagine me just not
• 1:31:36
  having any kind of just like I mean literally instant. They're trying to take
• 1:31:44
  care of you, and then they're trying to scare you. Oh you can't
• 1:31:48
  you can't take it. Don't take it. It's dangerous to get off them
• 1:31:50
  as the pressings. You shouldn't me. I'm not gonna allow that to control
• 1:31:57
  me. And I read my self off. I was like, never here,
• 1:32:00
  Mmm, it's more side effects than it is to help you exactly.
• 1:32:06
  That's what everything. Ye gotta taking something that's supposed to help me. Yeah,
• 1:32:13
  yeah to them, So I said, I will figure it out.
• 1:32:21
  So I'm okay, we're gonna get gotta get better. Though. This is
• 1:32:29
  my therapy. Though, this is my therapy right here, just doing this
• 1:32:31
  talking and you know what I'm saying, so any chance I can jump on,
• 1:32:36
  and I will jump on, especially on the topic like this, because
• 1:32:40
  it just needs to be heard. MS premise, and that's what I tell
• 1:32:45
  you, that's the premise of like girl interrupted is because we've been conditioned to
• 1:32:49
  hold everything in we were conditions. We don't talk about me, you know,
• 1:32:56
  and that's traumatic and that's not healthy for us. And that's why we
• 1:33:01
  get into these abuse of relationships. We allowed its abuse because we become numb
• 1:33:08
  to the trauma. We're used to it. So it's like we're expecting it.
• 1:33:12
  All okay, I want to see what are you gonna hear me today?
• 1:33:17
  We expect it because it's trauma because we've been talking to that. You
• 1:33:21
  don't talk about it when you'll be all right, you're praying a wait,
• 1:33:28
  but it's not. It's not it's killing on it's killing us. And then
• 1:33:33
  we carry that baggage and were passing on to our children, our children passing
• 1:33:39
  on to their ship. You know. It's just nobody wants to take accountability,
• 1:33:45
  you know, for the trauma in our lives, and so busy I
• 1:33:49
  say, this is why we get into these types of relationships, because that's
• 1:33:54
  what we're used to do, you know. So let's roll on into the
• 1:33:58
  final thoughts and this is just a recap of everything we talked about tonight to
• 1:34:02
  Octobers Domestic Violence Awareness Month. October is also Breast Cancer Awareness Month. So
• 1:34:10
  if you haven't gotten your time tis check, we'll get them toc tis check.
• 1:34:15
  We'll get them check. We'll get them to this squeeze. Don't then
• 1:34:18
  I'm put it in a thing and squeezing when them find out, make sure
• 1:34:23
  you don't have cancer. But domestic violence awareness, I don't believe we should
• 1:34:29
  just limit it to October. Talk about it every day as one of us.
• 1:34:32
  We need to talk about mental health every day because all of those are
• 1:34:36
  on the rise due to this pandemic or suffering insights. If you can't afford
• 1:34:45
  therapy, please look for the resources right now. There's a lot of resources
• 1:34:49
  for people that can't afford a little therapy. There's a lot of resources.
• 1:34:55
  Reach out to somebody. If you're in a domestic violence relationship, please seek
• 1:35:00
  him. If you need to talk, send me a message. If you
• 1:35:04
  need a police on that you're hand for a couple of these, hit my
• 1:35:09
  hand box, you leap on my couch. I'll need you my bed,
• 1:35:12
  I'll sleep on my couch. Just don't be another statistic. That's all I
• 1:35:16
  ask M. Let's put an end to this. There's a way, there's
• 1:35:23
  clothes and everything that you can do now to try to put yourself out of
• 1:35:27
  that situation. They haven't where you can call like the nine one one to
• 1:35:31
  act like you order your pizza, you call mhmm, you can go to
• 1:35:40
  pizza police. So there's Yeah, it's definitely way people get out if you
• 1:35:47
  really need to get out. But at the same time, you gotta wanna
• 1:35:51
  get out. Yep. Because I got a friend now, close, close,
• 1:35:57
  close, she's not in that situation anymore, right, thank you,
• 1:36:00
  hallelujah. But she was on the street walking with her kids one time trying
• 1:36:06
  to get away from this person. And then everything I could to encourage and
• 1:36:14
  keep it going, and you go right back. It's to the point where
• 1:36:16
  your eye is coming out of your socket. Yep. It was that bad.
• 1:36:23
  And you just keep having and you keep having children. You keep having
• 1:36:27
  children, you you know, because that's what they do. They beat you
• 1:36:34
  don't have come M, you had a baby, having each as why you're
• 1:36:43
  pregnant, Yep. On them drugs. You get on that ship and then
• 1:36:45
  you just you lose all kinds of sense of reality after that point. But
• 1:36:50
  that was my situation. That's what they do. That's what they do.
• 1:36:53
  They they throw it at you. It sounds good, it feels good,
• 1:36:57
  it looks good. Everything got good. You know. That was my situation.
• 1:37:03
  He was on, he got the whole again. I want to that
• 1:37:09
  night he threw that Berlin water on me. I wanna. I think it's
• 1:37:11
  moved from sherm that they when click on choose whatever they call it. But
• 1:37:15
  they dipped the weed and they bore him and food with Yeah, and that's
• 1:37:19
  what it took for me to leave. But I say five years and it
• 1:37:25
  went from and it like I said, it wasn't physical in the beginning,
• 1:37:29
  and started out it was firm, it was emotional, it was mental.
• 1:37:32
  Then it got physical. It got to the point says that when way were
• 1:37:36
  cold places, I wouldn't even say him, but I didn't want to see
• 1:37:43
  them most Yep. That's that's that that control. That's like don't you even
• 1:37:48
  look somebody in the eye. Don't you even speak when somebody come in the
• 1:37:51
  room. If I said somebody had a nice shirt, he was a copt
• 1:37:58
  with that nigga. You know that. That's that's what would do if I
• 1:38:00
  got off work, I got tool Keisha. If I got off work at
• 1:38:03
  ten. If if I was supposed to get off at ten o'clock and I
• 1:38:05
  didn't walk out to do it at ten fifteen, I knew I was gonna
• 1:38:09
  get my ass kid at night because he had a problem. Oh yeah,
• 1:38:14
  I knew it. I knew it was coming. But I said, because
• 1:38:17
  I loved him and do it all. Even when he went to jail,
• 1:38:26
  I wanted to drop to join it back. I didn't take it back.
• 1:38:30
  I just dropped the charges and took off front of it. That's what I
• 1:38:34
  did. But it's hard. It's hard to get out of those relationships because
• 1:38:42
  the man has torn you down and its major feel like you're nothing. But
• 1:38:45
  I want to every woman out here tonight, each and every man, because
• 1:38:49
  man going through domestic abuse violence situations as well. But to you, my
• 1:38:56
  women, get out before it's too late, because it does not better,
• 1:39:00
  It does not get any better, and there may not be a next time.
• 1:39:08
  It may not be a next time. I will post the links again.
• 1:39:12
  Let me rule that video bag. I know I'm wonta rut the video
• 1:39:15
  back, but I will post the food numbers for the domestic violence Hope nine.
• 1:39:20
  Please contact anybody if you can go to a friend family helped. Posted
• 1:39:26
  on social media. I saw a young lady in Balton. I'm gonna I'm
• 1:39:29
  gonna share a so we'll talk after the broadcast. But a young lady would
• 1:39:32
  on uh social media. She's been to the police everything. This man has
• 1:39:40
  created seventy Facebook accounts. He has broken to the house, he has stalked
• 1:39:46
  her, her mother, her ex husband. Police won't do anything, and
• 1:39:55
  that's how women are getting killed. They're trying to order. Don't mean nothing
• 1:40:03
  to a lot of them. And I want to say, she's at five
• 1:40:09
  restraining orders on him. She's even the ex girlfriend and he was dealing before
• 1:40:15
  her has restraining orders on him. He's she said she has put she's she's
• 1:40:24
  scared a change your number because she feels like he's put a tracking device on
• 1:40:26
  her phone like everything. So, ladies, if you could get out,
• 1:40:31
  go go, go, go, run as fast as you can and don't
• 1:40:35
  look back. You are worthy. Do not let a man belittle you and
• 1:40:40
  tell you you are nothing. You are a queen. And I love you.
• 1:40:46
  And like I said, my inbox is always open, my phone number.
• 1:40:50
  Hit me up. If you got me, called me, we can
• 1:40:53
  talk. I can walk from out of it. So let's do that.
• 1:41:00
  So I want to thank each and every person that tuned in tonight. Thank
• 1:41:03
  you guys for even allowing me to share my store tonight. Tune in next
• 1:41:09
  Tuesday because guess what it's about to get trustick, because we about to talk
• 1:41:15
  about sets and everybody else safe. Thank good when it's with the right person.
• 1:41:25
  But don't forget next Tuesday a pm Central Time, n pm Eastern Time.
• 1:41:30
  Love y'all, Thank you for again for joining Black Girl Interrupted tonight.
• 1:41:33
  Shout out to my sister Keith. Shout out to my sister Maggote for joining
• 1:41:39
  us tonight for a little girl talk and a little love the less and a
• 1:41:43
  lot of teams. Yeah, because I'm about to take this week though a
• 1:41:46
  girl cut though you. So I love you guys. See y'all Tuesday. By