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July 5 - Redirected Strength · The Daily Ripples Podcast

• 0:04
  Welcome back to the Daily Ripples podcast.
• 0:06
  I am Pastor Mike and I have my wife Cristi with me again here today.
• 0:12
  Do you want to say hello to everybody as we start off?
• 0:15
  Am I on payroll?
• 0:17
  You might be.
• 0:18
  I'll tell you what, I will share my paycheck with you from this podcast.
• 0:22
  Do we get it from Corey?
• 0:24
  Yes, we will be paid exactly the same amount that Corey is paid.
• 0:28
  Okay, okay.
• 0:28
  All right. Everybody who has ever been on this show has been paid the exact amount of zero.
• 0:36
  But anyway, today is July the 5th. It is Sunday fun day. And our daily ripple for today is titled
• 0:47
  Redirected Strength, The Stone. The problem is not always lack of strength. Sometimes it is strength
• 0:53
  aimed in the wrong direction. Ripple 1 is practical. Today I will pause before pushing harder and ask
• 1:00
  where I am aiming my effort. I will not assume that more force equals better results. Direction
• 1:13
  matters more than intensity. Ripple 2 is spiritual. God does not ask me to become less of who I am.
• 1:20
  He redirects what is already in me.
• 1:23
  In Christ, even my stubbornness and drive can be shaped into perseverance and faithfulness.
• 1:29
  The Holy Spirit leads my will so it aligns with the Father's purpose.
• 1:33
  And as always, we'll save our prayer for the end of the day.
• 1:38
  And what I think of initially, especially when I read the stone, you know, that first line,
• 1:43
  the problem isn't always lack of strength, is I think about how for so many years before
• 1:49
  I experienced it myself, when I would think of an alcoholic or a drug addict or even somebody that
• 1:59
  was, you know, their life was falling apart for whatever reason, I would always think, and I'm sure
• 2:04
  I didn't just come from nowhere, I'm sure it was based on what other people around me were saying,
• 2:08
  but I would always think that they were just weak. Well, they just need a stronger will,
• 2:13
  They need stronger ability to resist things and things of that nature.
• 2:18
  But part of the source material for this out of the AA Big Book on page 45 says that our human resources, and that's not talking about the department at work, but anyway, about our gifts and abilities, as marshaled by the will, we're not sufficient because they failed utterly.
• 2:35
  And we learn in a recovery program that it's not about a lack of willpower, but it's about our willpower being used for the wrong things.
• 2:43
  And so really that's what this is talking about is how to realign our strength and our will in the right direction
• 2:49
  But before we started recording you you made the comment when you're reading this over, you know five minutes ago
• 2:54
  That oh this this was good or something like that. You said so clearly something sparked in you
• 2:58
  So what do you got for me?
• 3:00
  When I read that the problem is not always lack of strength sometimes is strength aimed in the wrong direction
• 3:07
  I thought about that one of the challenges when we first got married
• 3:13
  was that I was trying to be the man and the woman in the relationship.
• 3:20
  No comment.
• 3:21
  That is the safest route to take.
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  I know.
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  I've learned.
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  Because I needed you to understand that I was strong,
• 3:31
  that I could handle things myself.
• 3:33
  I didn't need you.
• 3:34
  What do you mean?
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  I can handle things myself.
• 3:38
  I chose you.
• 3:39
  Like, it wasn't because I needed you.
• 3:41
  It was because I chose you, so don't get it twisted.
• 3:45
  But what I had to learn and recognize is,
• 3:51
  ma'am, you are putting too much effort into the wrong thing.
• 3:57
  Okay?
• 3:58
  Let him be the man.
• 4:00
  Let him handle things.
• 4:02
  Let him fix things.
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  Let him lead.
• 4:06
  Let him be the head of the household.
• 4:09
  Okay?
• 4:10
  That is too much for you to try to take on.
• 4:12
  There was a point in your life that you needed to do both,
• 4:16
  but you don't need to do that anymore.
• 4:18
  So when I was trying to show you my strength and how strong I was,
• 4:23
  I didn't need to.
• 4:25
  Now, there came a point in our marriage that I needed to hold both of us up,
• 4:30
  and I did.
• 4:33
  So the strength came when it needed to be there,
• 4:36
  But I didn't need to come out the gate showing all my strength and I am woman, hear me roar.
• 4:43
  I didn't need to do that because all that did was create conflict that didn't need to be there.
• 4:49
  And when you gave the analogy about thinking that people in AA was weak, that's what I thought about mental illness as a whole.
• 4:58
  And people that had thoughts of suicide, what?
• 5:03
  You just don't know how to handle life if you're thinking that until I had thoughts of suicide.
• 5:09
  Right, right.
• 5:10
  Then it's like, oh, this is what you were talking about.
• 5:16
  Yeah, it has nothing to do with weakness.
• 5:18
  It has to do with living and experiences and things like that.
• 5:22
  It doesn't have anything to do with lack of faith, as we talked about yesterday.
• 5:28
  It just has to do with kind of everything piling up on you at one time.
• 5:33
  And if you're blessed enough, you can rise above.
• 5:37
  But yeah, strength being directed and aimed in the wrong direction just can create conflict
• 5:43
  and unnecessary effort.
• 5:45
  So you have to realize and understand and make sure and do, you know, a check to make sure,
• 5:53
  am I putting all my efforts in the right place, in the right way?
• 5:58
  And it talks about in Christ, even my stubbornness.
• 6:02
  Now, we're not going to talk specifically about my stubbornness.
• 6:06
  I've got a list.
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  I know.
• 6:07
  I know.
• 6:08
  I have my own list.
• 6:10
  Even when it comes to Christ, he knows that I'm stubborn.
• 6:14
  Even in life in general, I'm stubborn.
• 6:18
  I know you probably don't think this, but I am working on it, okay?
• 6:25
  It could be shaped in perseverance and faithfulness.
• 6:29
  Yeah, we're going to put that, you know, sunshine and rainbows on it.
• 6:34
  That is.
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  I mean, I'll just say at this point and in December, I know you never know this, but in
• 6:40
  December, we'll have been married for nine years.
• 6:44
  Yeah, nine years.
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  That's most of a decade.
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  So clearly there has been learning and growth on both sides of this marriage, or we would
• 6:54
  not be sitting here at eight plus years having been married.
• 6:59
  And I'm just thankful when I think about that, that you've never seen me drunk or you've never seen me drink alcohol, anything of that nature.
• 7:12
  And a lot of people talk about that in the program, a lot about how they're glad that their kids never saw them, depending on when they got sober, that their kids never saw them or that they won't remember it and things like that.
• 7:22
  And unfortunately, some kids do see that, but then they get to see the example as well of the recovering parent who redirects that strength to the right thing.
• 7:34
  It shows that they're strong enough to get past something that had such a grip on them for so long.
• 7:41
  And even outside of AA, someone that's dealing with mental illness as a whole, and they go get the help they need so they can become a whole individual again.
• 7:52
  You know, spouses and children see that.
• 7:55
  And when they see that, even my children, they've seen their mother struggle through various life experiences.
• 8:02
  And they tell me now, oh, we know you're happy.
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  We know what happiness looks like on you.
• 8:08
  So that within itself lets you know that, yeah, there's growth and that I'm using my strength now in a good way.
• 8:18
  And they have said to me, yeah, finally, you've allowed a man to lead you.
• 8:27
  Finally, you've allowed a man to come into your life and compliment your life and you're not trying to overtake.
• 8:34
  So even my own children saw that and they see the difference now that I finally let down my guard and of redirecting my strength.
• 8:45
  Now, don't let it be confused.
• 8:48
  They admired that strength because it allowed me to get through things and propel forward and even propelled them forward.
• 8:55
  But now they realize I don't have to have that guard up.
• 8:58
  I don't have to use that strength all the time.
• 9:01
  I only have to use it when it's absolutely necessary and when it's called for.
• 9:05
  Is that because I have maintained proper control of my woman?
• 9:11
  Is it where we end the podcast?
• 9:13
  No, I'm trying to make a point here.
• 9:15
  That was a serious question.
• 9:17
  Because, you know, you've talked about that a couple of times now about, you know, being the helpmate and about learning.
• 9:25
  And really what you've been getting around is the concept of submission, as it's worded in the Bible, at least from your perspective.
• 9:34
  But that's a two-way street as well, because there's also certain requirements in Scripture for me as the husband.
• 9:40
  Most definitely.
• 9:41
  And one of those requirements is not to control your woman.
• 9:45
  You better believe it, because if you did, we wouldn't be sitting here together.
• 9:49
  That's why before this turns into the conservative caucus women of America, you know, podcast, I wanted to make sure that it was clear that it's not because I don't know.
• 10:01
  It sounds stupid.
• 10:02
  He was saying it, but rule the house with an iron.
• 10:04
  Yeah, it's not that.
• 10:06
  Hopefully.
• 10:07
  And fear driven.
• 10:08
  Hopefully people can hear and understand that I'm not the type of woman to be controlled.
• 10:14
  I tried.
• 10:15
  Okay.
• 10:16
  Yeah, I'm not that word.
• 10:18
  I'm not that woman by any stretch of the imagination.
• 10:22
  But instead, the way he leads is by example.
• 10:27
  It's not by words.
• 10:29
  It's by example.
• 10:31
  If you have a man that doesn't have to say, I'm the head of the household.
• 10:36
  I had someone that said that to me.
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  If you have to say it, you've already lost.
• 10:42
  It's the leading by example.
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  It's I follow you because I've seen you do it.
• 10:50
  I've already you've already laid the path.
• 10:53
  So all I have to do is walk.
• 10:55
  So that's what makes it easy because you are leading by example.
• 11:00
  You talked about it.
• 11:01
  You know, the stubbornness and drive are transformed into perseverance and faithfulness.
• 11:06
  Yes, that's I've definitely seen that in you.
• 11:08
  And that's been a good example for me, you know, especially over this past year, just being steady and being there.
• 11:16
  for me in a time of turmoil, just like we talked a little bit yesterday and today with
• 11:23
  mental health struggles and some transitions that I didn't expect or didn't account for,
• 11:28
  just being there, almost kind of like my little Peter.
• 11:36
  But don't turn around and deny me three times tomorrow morning, if you would.
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  You've been my rock is what I'm trying to say.
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  You've been my rock.
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  Okay.
• 11:44
  Not my salvation, because that's Jesus.
• 11:46
  I just don't want to cut your ear off.
• 11:48
  Yeah, we don't.
• 11:50
  That turned viral quickly.
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  Y'all see what I'm dealing with or hear what I'm dealing with.
• 11:55
  I needed them to really understand that I'm not a woman to be controlled.
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  And you immediately go to the sword.
• 12:00
  Well, now they know I'm not a woman to be controlled.
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  On that note, we will have hopefully one more day with Cristi here with us on the podcast.
• 12:13
  but we're going to close out today's with our prayer for today.
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  Father, take what you have already placed in me and give it direction.
• 12:21
  Through Your Spirit, guide my will so that my life reflects Your purpose.
• 12:26
  Amen.
• 12:26
  Amen.