Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / 289. Handling the Hurdles: Natalie Kuhn On How to Conquer Tough Moments & Embrace the Unknown

Transcript

289. Handling the Hurdles: Natalie Kuhn On How to Conquer Tough Moments & Embrace the Unknown · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

0:00
Speaker 1: Choose kind eyes, and so every time I look in
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Speaker 1: the mirror, I'm reminding myself choose to see in a
0:08
Speaker 1: kinder way. And that's my way of strengthening the newly
0:13
Speaker 1: formed lesson.
0:28
Speaker 2: What's going on?
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Speaker 3: Everyone, Emily A Body Here. You are listening to episode
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Speaker 3: two hundred and eighty nine of Hurdle, a wellness focused
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Speaker 3: podcast where I talk to inspirational people about everything from
0:40
Speaker 3: their highest ties and toughest moments to essential tips on
0:43
Speaker 3: how to live a healthier, happier, more motivated life. We
0:48
Speaker 3: all go through our fair share of hurdles. My goal
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Speaker 3: through these discussions is to empower you to better navigate
0:54
Speaker 3: yours and move with intention so that you can stride
0:57
Speaker 3: towards your own big potential and of course have some
1:01
Speaker 3: fun along the way. For today's episode, I am bringing
1:06
Speaker 3: in my girl, Natalie Kune. She is the co CEO
1:10
Speaker 3: and a founding teacher over at the class.
1:14
Speaker 2: This isn't her first rodeo here on Hurdle.
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Speaker 3: In fact, her first episode, which I will link in
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Speaker 3: the show notes, is truly one of my all time favorites.
1:23
Speaker 3: In it, she says something I reference often, how does
1:27
Speaker 3: a muscle strengthen you? Give it something to push up against.
1:31
Speaker 3: How does your will strengthen you give it something to
1:35
Speaker 3: push up against.
1:37
Speaker 2: I think about this all the.
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Speaker 3: Time, and that's exactly what I brought her back onto
1:42
Speaker 3: the show to talk about today, This concept of resilience.
1:47
Speaker 3: How do we make decisions during difficult and turbulent times,
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Speaker 3: as we call on the show, hurdle moments without attachment
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Speaker 3: to outcome? How can we live through these more moments
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Speaker 3: that feel like we are so down and out and
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Speaker 3: know that there is opportunity within them? Natalie knows a
2:08
Speaker 3: thing or two herself about navigating tough times. In today's episode,
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Speaker 3: she opens up about how she has been dealing with
2:17
Speaker 3: gosh a multitude of hurdles in her personal life as
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Speaker 3: her partner Kevin, was diagnosed with cancer during the pandemic.
2:27
Speaker 3: That diagnosis brought the two of them out to the
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Speaker 3: West Coast from Brooklyn, and not only did they uproot
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Speaker 3: their entire lives, but in doing so, she was also
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Speaker 3: taking on new roles professionally. Through it all, she has
2:42
Speaker 3: done her best to keep a positive perspective, and we
2:45
Speaker 3: talk exactly about that.
2:47
Speaker 2: In today's episode.
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Speaker 3: Natalie shares her three helpful pathways to making difficult decisions,
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Speaker 3: and I'm.
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Speaker 2: Going to make a bold statement.
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Speaker 3: The way that you think about challenge after listening to
3:00
Speaker 3: this episode will completely change forever. So grateful for Natalie's time,
3:06
Speaker 3: and truly, I feel so lucky lately that I've been
3:09
Speaker 3: able to reconnect with people that make my soul happy.
3:14
Speaker 3: I've had a hectic a few weeks myself, and so
3:17
Speaker 3: being able to bring up conversations with friends to the
3:20
Speaker 3: feed and have such wonderful feedback and responses from all
3:24
Speaker 3: of you, it makes me feel like I'm doing something
3:27
Speaker 3: right here. Make sure you're following along with the show
3:30
Speaker 3: over on social It's at Hurdle Podcast. I am over
3:33
Speaker 3: at Emily a Body And if you're not yet subscribed
3:37
Speaker 3: to the weekly Hurdle newsletter, I'd love the opportunity to
3:40
Speaker 3: land in your inbox every single Friday for free with
3:45
Speaker 3: the same motivation, inspiration and things you love about the show.
3:49
Speaker 3: The like to subscribe is in the show notes. With that,
3:53
Speaker 3: let's get to it. Let's get to Hurdling.
4:07
Speaker 2: Today.
4:08
Speaker 3: I'm sitting down with the ever lovely Natalie Kune. She's
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Speaker 3: the co CEO and a founding teacher of the class.
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Speaker 1: How are you doing that, Emily, I'm so happy to
4:20
Speaker 1: be on here with you again. I love you, I
4:23
Speaker 1: admire you. I've been looking forward to this all year. Wow,
4:28
Speaker 1: all year A good thing. We're twenty six days in.
4:30
Speaker 1: I understand my enthusiasm for you, and the love is
4:36
Speaker 1: seriously shared. Natalie and I first connected, i'd say about
4:41
Speaker 1: four years ago at the class, and then recorded together
4:45
Speaker 1: the first time in twenty twenty. I'll make sure to
4:48
Speaker 1: link that episode in the show notes. But when it
4:52
Speaker 1: comes to people that I look to for a ray
4:57
Speaker 1: of positivity, like we so often talk about censoring or
5:02
Speaker 1: maybe being a little bit more cognizant of the people
5:05
Speaker 1: that were following on social media. Are they energy faucets
5:08
Speaker 1: versus energy drains? How do you look? How do you
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Speaker 1: feel when you look at their content? When I look
5:13
Speaker 1: at Natalie's content, I'm like, we got this. Oh my gosh,
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Speaker 1: bless your heart.
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Speaker 2: I have to say.
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Speaker 1: I mean, I would love to know what social media,
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Speaker 1: what your relationship to social media is for you, But
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Speaker 1: for me, it's a place where I'm just putting reminders
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Speaker 1: for myself. This is the outlook I want that I'm seeking.
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Speaker 1: I'm draining myself by hopefully showing other people what I
5:40
Speaker 1: want to be thinking about, what I want to be perceiving.
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Speaker 1: And I feel that same way about your entire podcast.
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Speaker 1: I feel like you have the same ethos. How are
5:49
Speaker 1: we going to get over that hurdle? What have you
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Speaker 1: learned along the way, and what does it How can
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Speaker 1: I approach my future in the best way? And you
6:00
Speaker 1: challenge as a gift. So that's something I see in
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Speaker 1: you and.
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Speaker 2: Just a mirror.
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Speaker 3: Wow, honestly, what a great vibe to start this conversation
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Speaker 3: off with. So much has happened understandably so in the
6:14
Speaker 3: past three years since I've had the opportunity to have
6:18
Speaker 3: you on the show, a lot of which wasn't necessarily
6:22
Speaker 3: on your BINGO card for twenty twenty one through twenty
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Speaker 3: twenty three. So catch us up to speed, NAT.
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Speaker 2: And who's was right?
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Speaker 1: I mean? If I I think if anybody listening right
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Speaker 1: now softened their eyes closed and just ask themselves the question,
6:39
Speaker 1: are you the same person that you were in twenty twenty?
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Speaker 1: If I was in real time? Let's see how old
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Speaker 1: was I then? Thirty four? I feel like I'm sixty
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Speaker 1: eight now.
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Speaker 2: You don't look at day over sixty one.
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Speaker 1: Thank you so much, but we really had to learn
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Speaker 1: a lot of lessons, and we had to learn them fast,
7:01
Speaker 1: and we had to learn them in a pressure cooker.
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Speaker 2: And I think that's true for all of us. Obviously.
7:06
Speaker 1: Twenty twenty one and twenty twenty two were this period
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Speaker 1: of time where anyone who saw success during the pandemic
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Speaker 1: was fighting to keep it and anybody who saw a
7:19
Speaker 1: kind of devastation was maybe rebuilding. For me, I stepped
7:24
Speaker 1: into the role of co CEO with Chris Samborn and
7:28
Speaker 1: tearing Toomey is our founder two years ago in the
7:32
Speaker 1: spring of twenty twenty two, And you know, twenty twenty
7:36
Speaker 1: twenty one twenty twenty two were worlds unto themselves. There
7:41
Speaker 1: were three years packed into one in terms of the macroeconomics.
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Speaker 1: Every business was facing the total volatility of whatever industry
7:50
Speaker 1: you were in fill in the blank, you know, and
7:53
Speaker 1: stepping into this role was it really has been such
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Speaker 1: an honor of my lifetime because you know this, Emily,
8:00
Speaker 1: but I'm the first employee of the class ten and
8:04
Speaker 1: a half years ago. Taran was just formulating the website
8:09
Speaker 1: at the time and we hit it off, and we
8:12
Speaker 1: believe in this method and we kept it going with
8:15
Speaker 1: JC Gossitt, going through all of these different life cycles
8:18
Speaker 1: and iterations, and those chapters pre pandemic felt like two
8:22
Speaker 1: and a half years at a time, and then after
8:24
Speaker 1: the pandemic it was like every nine months. The landscape
8:27
Speaker 1: was changing, But probably the most dramatic change in my
8:32
Speaker 1: life was nine months ago. I'm still getting my sea
8:38
Speaker 1: legs in this new form of leadership and in this
8:41
Speaker 1: new role, still facing big challenges as somebody navigating the
8:49
Speaker 1: economic volatility and then trying to figure out what in
8:57
Speaker 1: the world was going on with my fiance's health. And
9:01
Speaker 1: on May fifth, we got the diagnosis that it's stage
9:07
Speaker 1: four metastatic melanoma cancer. It's skin cancer that metastasized in
9:11
Speaker 1: the lung, and very very quickly, we had to make
9:16
Speaker 1: some hard decisions under very difficult circumstances, and it had
9:21
Speaker 1: to be you know, we have a motto at the class,
9:24
Speaker 1: but it's definitely one that all of us take into
9:27
Speaker 1: our own personal lives. It's family first. So we had
9:30
Speaker 1: to shift the ballast from my full concentration going from
9:37
Speaker 1: learning leadership and leading at the same time into how
9:41
Speaker 1: do I do that while my personal life is compounding
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Speaker 1: and the deepest fears that all of us share around
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Speaker 1: mortality are knocking at the door. What does it mean
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Speaker 1: for family? What does it mean for our future? What
10:00
Speaker 1: does it mean for work? What does it mean for love?
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Speaker 1: And that's really where I think I've seen the most
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Speaker 1: growth in myself, and that was barely nine months ago.
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Speaker 3: Yeah, thanks so much for sharing that. I know it's
10:17
Speaker 3: been truly a difficult journey for the two of you,
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Speaker 3: and of course as well as your greater community, a
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Speaker 3: journey that you have very vulnerably shared with that community
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Speaker 3: myself included. And I would be remissive I didn't say
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Speaker 3: that your strength outwardly, at the very least, despite this challenge,
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Speaker 3: has been so awe inspiring to Winnes. You mentioned that
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Speaker 3: a theme for you emerging from this, which is a
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Speaker 3: testament to the type of person that you are, is growth.
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Speaker 3: Talk to me a little bit about that and how
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Speaker 3: you choose consciously to focus on the growth amidst the uncertainty.
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Speaker 2: Yes, that is great.
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Speaker 1: I think you know a lot of the ladies that
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Speaker 1: I've mentored in my life, I've tried to redirect some
11:18
Speaker 1: of the conversations. Most of the time, women who are
11:22
Speaker 1: trying to find their passion, their vocation. Often say you know,
11:27
Speaker 1: what is the job that's going to make me happy?
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Speaker 1: And then I often hear the same thing in relationships.
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Speaker 1: I'm in five years into my marriage, I'm in ten
11:36
Speaker 1: years into my marriage. You know I'm not happy. And
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Speaker 1: I actually don't think that that's the right question, because
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Speaker 1: I do think that happiness is a state of being,
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Speaker 1: and we are meant to move through states of being
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Speaker 1: like weather patterns. There's meant to be a seasonality to
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Speaker 1: our sadness, our grief, our happiness, our joy, our courage.
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Speaker 1: And I think that if we hold our life to
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Speaker 1: the standard of happy, we are doing a disservice to
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Speaker 1: the expansiveness of our human condition. And for me, the
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Speaker 1: better question that's always resulted in something much more invitational,
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Speaker 1: an answer that's much more invitational is am I going
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Speaker 1: to grow? How is this going to evolve me? Can
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Speaker 1: I see this as an opportunity to mature, to develop,
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Speaker 1: to learn and under these circumstances personally and professionally. If
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Speaker 1: I just saw them as happening to me, then I
12:42
Speaker 1: become a victim of my circumstances. If I see them
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Speaker 1: as happening for me, then there's some future vision that
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Speaker 1: I'm holding myself toward on a wider horizon. It's almost
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Speaker 1: like my future self, the one that's up leveled, the
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Speaker 1: one that's more capable, the one that's more and more generous,
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Speaker 1: is calling me forward simply by being able to choose
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Speaker 1: to perceive this moment as its own form of a
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Speaker 1: university like.
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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean so admirable, right, And I'm sure so
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Speaker 3: many listening to these sentiments. They hear what you're saying
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Speaker 3: and think to themselves, well, that sounds ideal. But in
13:25
Speaker 3: the difficult moments, when you're trying to grasp for that
13:30
Speaker 3: perspective and the chaos is in your midst, how do
13:36
Speaker 3: you get to this place where you remember that that
13:40
Speaker 3: perspective that you so beautifully described is one that could
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Speaker 3: serve you versus perhaps the victim mindset alternative.
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Speaker 1: Emily, you are such You're so good at this that
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Speaker 1: thinks such a great question.
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Speaker 2: Thank you for it.
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Speaker 1: I want to just normalize it by saying that the
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Speaker 1: way we perceive things is a practice. So I didn't
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Speaker 1: just wake up one day and it's like, oh great,
14:05
Speaker 1: everything that happens today is going to be a lesson.
14:08
Speaker 1: This is something that I have built muscle around and
14:11
Speaker 1: continue to build muscle around. I did not reach some
14:14
Speaker 1: kind of mountaintop where nothing ever affects me.
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Speaker 2: Ever, again, it's really.
14:18
Speaker 1: It really is practice, And there are a lot of
14:22
Speaker 1: times where a challenge is hitting me personally or professionally.
14:26
Speaker 1: For example, even the one with cancer, it's like, what, why,
14:30
Speaker 1: Why is this happening to him?
14:33
Speaker 2: How are we going to get through? There's just overwhelming panic.
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Speaker 1: That was absolutely the first month after the diagnosis. But
14:42
Speaker 1: I do feel like I've started to distill three tips,
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Speaker 1: three pathways to coming to those hard decisions, to being
14:53
Speaker 1: able to make those hard decisions in a way that
14:57
Speaker 1: feels like growth. And I would say that the first
15:02
Speaker 1: one is, before making any decision, before stepping toward that
15:07
Speaker 1: challenge or that difficulty, get your self in order, not
15:15
Speaker 1: get yourself in order, get yourself in order. What is
15:19
Speaker 1: your state? If you're coming from fear, your decision is
15:23
Speaker 1: going to be rooted in fear. If you're coming from
15:26
Speaker 1: a centered place, so will your decision making. And Kevin
15:31
Speaker 1: and I really had to work through a lot of terror,
15:35
Speaker 1: really truly, the fear of death before we were able
15:39
Speaker 1: to make a clear decision about what type of imminotherapy
15:45
Speaker 1: we were going to attempt, where that was going to
15:47
Speaker 1: take place, you know, And then professionally, what direction is
15:51
Speaker 1: the company going to take? What risks are we willing
15:55
Speaker 1: to stick our necks out for? Right, So the first
15:58
Speaker 1: one is really just get your state in order.
16:02
Speaker 3: For those that are approaching a difficult moment as we
16:07
Speaker 3: talk through these three things, and perhaps they aren't in
16:12
Speaker 3: the midst of this moment with another Perhaps they're braving
16:16
Speaker 3: this hurdle moment on their own, whether it could have
16:20
Speaker 3: been anticipated or it's completely on a whim, regardless of
16:24
Speaker 3: the circumstance, Do you have any advice when it comes
16:28
Speaker 3: to the act of getting yourself together for someone who
16:32
Speaker 3: feels like they're in this one hundred percent solo one
16:36
Speaker 3: hundred percent.
16:37
Speaker 2: This is such a great question. Move your body.
16:40
Speaker 1: This is why I believe in the class so much,
16:42
Speaker 1: because it's a workout that combines fitness with mindfulness. So
16:46
Speaker 1: you're really using the workout not for some optical, you know,
16:51
Speaker 1: cultural idea of perfection, but to understand what emotions and
16:56
Speaker 1: what mental patterns are coming up so that you can
16:59
Speaker 1: work with it in a go. If that doesn't resonate
17:02
Speaker 1: with you. There's a reason why it's called you know,
17:04
Speaker 1: the runners high.
17:05
Speaker 2: You know this better than anybody.
17:07
Speaker 1: Go for a run, shake your body, dance, Move your
17:10
Speaker 1: body so that the stagnant thoughts and the sharp emotion
17:19
Speaker 1: doesn't keep you stuck. So you know, and that's that overwhelmed.
17:25
Speaker 1: That is a paralysis in and of itself. Right, So
17:29
Speaker 1: move your body in order to address your mind and
17:33
Speaker 1: your heart.
17:34
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that tip, and obviously you and I
17:38
Speaker 3: both huge fans of utilizing that as regularly as we
17:42
Speaker 3: can to get through the tough moments. We talk about
17:47
Speaker 3: here getting yourself set in this practice of setting yourself
17:54
Speaker 3: up and kind of practicing perhaps a respond instead of
17:59
Speaker 3: react approach. What would you say is the goal here
18:06
Speaker 3: in that by setting yourself up? What do you want
18:10
Speaker 3: to experience when the act quote unquote is done.
18:15
Speaker 1: Yeah, you'll know that you've gotten yourself in order. You'll
18:19
Speaker 1: know that your state is ready for decision making when
18:25
Speaker 1: the emotional charge of the decision itself has released. So
18:32
Speaker 1: if your decision has to do with like, oh, you know,
18:35
Speaker 1: for example, us, which healing path are we going to take?
18:38
Speaker 1: Because you know, the prognosis was you got two years
18:41
Speaker 1: to live, So it really fucking matters which path you take,
18:46
Speaker 1: you know, And so we had to work through that
18:50
Speaker 1: terror to the point where finally when we were like, okay, immunotherapy,
18:55
Speaker 1: the word doesn't scare me. I've now repeated the word cancer.
18:59
Speaker 1: I'm looking at that and I okay. You know, even
19:02
Speaker 1: things like my meeting with the investor, my entrepreneurship, when
19:06
Speaker 1: I can shake my body free of the emotion that's
19:11
Speaker 1: clouding it or covering it and see it without an
19:14
Speaker 1: emotional sweater tenor charge takes It could take a while.
19:22
Speaker 1: It's it, you know, and it might be a practice
19:25
Speaker 1: that requires discipline.
19:29
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm curious about your experience in the in between,
19:35
Speaker 3: because you gave it a month timeline, right and understandably,
19:41
Speaker 3: so when you're told you have two years, was there
19:45
Speaker 3: judgment about moving before you were ready or feeling as
19:50
Speaker 3: though you were taking too much time to set yourself
19:53
Speaker 3: up to move forward resolutely?
19:55
Speaker 1: It was a ping pong pendulum experience of confus I
20:01
Speaker 1: think the number of times I took the dog on
20:03
Speaker 1: a walk just to clear my head, just to try
20:06
Speaker 1: to work through you know, should we move to la
20:09
Speaker 1: do we go to Boston? There's only four places in
20:11
Speaker 1: the whole world that offer this clinical trial. Which one
20:14
Speaker 1: is going to make sense for him, Which one's going
20:15
Speaker 1: to keep him alive, Which one is going to allow
20:17
Speaker 1: me to keep my job because his insurance is on
20:19
Speaker 1: my company, you know, I mean really it's And the
20:23
Speaker 1: thing is, you don't have to We really ought not
20:27
Speaker 1: to wait to do these practices of turning toward the
20:31
Speaker 1: thing that scares us and moving our body in order
20:35
Speaker 1: to shift the emotional charge to getting centered, finding our breath,
20:41
Speaker 1: all of these things. Because the way that we practice
20:44
Speaker 1: that in real life, the everyday practice of that is
20:50
Speaker 1: you know, your partner wants to watch a movie and
20:55
Speaker 1: you want to go to dinner. There's no, oh, mortality
21:02
Speaker 1: risk in that decision, but how you make that decision
21:08
Speaker 1: sets the tone for how you're going to make a
21:11
Speaker 1: decision for the bigger things. So you want to stay
21:14
Speaker 1: awake and you want to practice these things on the
21:17
Speaker 1: daily so that you have muscle memory, emotional muscle memory
21:23
Speaker 1: the next time you're faced with something big.
21:26
Speaker 3: I love what you said about how you had to
21:28
Speaker 3: build that muscle memory around your perspective to embrace this
21:33
Speaker 3: way of approaching difficult moments and tough decisions. I'll never forget.
21:39
Speaker 3: When I first interviewed you, you said a quote that
21:43
Speaker 3: I still come back to so regularly, and it was,
21:48
Speaker 3: how does a muscle strengthen you give it something to
21:51
Speaker 3: push up against? And then how does your will strengthen
21:55
Speaker 3: you give it something to push up against? And so
21:57
Speaker 3: it really is, you know, the crux, the thesis, the
22:02
Speaker 3: core of the work that I do so much of
22:08
Speaker 3: understanding that these hard moments, while they won't be easy
22:13
Speaker 3: and many of them unanticipated, that doesn't mean that they're
22:18
Speaker 3: not happening for us, and it doesn't mean that you
22:23
Speaker 3: cannot get through them and then be stronger to handle
22:26
Speaker 3: the next one. On the other side, I know you
22:30
Speaker 3: said you had a three things. Oh yes, yes, okay,
22:34
Speaker 3: So I want to get to number two. But I
22:36
Speaker 3: could praise you for hours, So let's keep going. Bless
22:38
Speaker 3: your heart, thank you.
22:40
Speaker 1: The second one is radically simplify, Radically simplify so that
22:48
Speaker 1: you really understand the problem that you're really trying to solve. So,
22:55
Speaker 1: you know, let me explain, because we are often solving
22:59
Speaker 1: a slightly different problem than the one actually at hand.
23:04
Speaker 1: We often choose to solve the problem that we think
23:07
Speaker 1: we have an answer for because it's more relieving, it's
23:11
Speaker 1: more comfortable, it's more familiar, rather than the problem we
23:15
Speaker 1: really don't have an answer for, and that's the one
23:17
Speaker 1: that's actually on the table. So radically simplifying is this
23:23
Speaker 1: practice of breaking down the complex situation into much more
23:27
Speaker 1: manageable components that can be like, the economy is stagnant,
23:32
Speaker 1: why isn't my company growing at the rate that I
23:36
Speaker 1: need it to? And that can be also which clinical
23:40
Speaker 1: trial is going to save my partner's life?
23:44
Speaker 2: But it also starts with the every day.
23:46
Speaker 1: It starts with like Monday morning, you get up, you
23:51
Speaker 1: have your coffee or you know, whatever you do with
23:54
Speaker 1: your lemon water, and then you look at your day
23:58
Speaker 1: and radically simplify it in to what is the real
24:01
Speaker 1: problem I'm trying I'm trying to solve, not the problem
24:04
Speaker 1: I want to solve.
24:07
Speaker 3: Okay, so let's dive into that even more. Then let's
24:13
Speaker 3: peel back another layer of the onion. So when someone
24:17
Speaker 3: is faced with an issue, Let's say the issue is
24:22
Speaker 3: someone spraying their ankle, and maybe they had a plan
24:29
Speaker 3: to do a relay race with some friends in two weeks.
24:34
Speaker 3: This is the most random example I have ever come
24:37
Speaker 3: up with. And they are in this place now where
24:42
Speaker 3: they don't know what to do about their sprained ankle
24:44
Speaker 3: because they were so excited about participating in the relay
24:47
Speaker 3: race with their friends. So how do we simplify this
24:51
Speaker 3: in a radical way?
24:53
Speaker 2: Right?
24:53
Speaker 1: Well, we're so conditioned to have the answer. Right, So, Okay,
24:58
Speaker 1: I've sprained my ankle, and in if I do enough
25:00
Speaker 1: ice packs, then in this amount of day, the inflammation's
25:03
Speaker 1: going to go down.
25:04
Speaker 2: I'm going to take to advil.
25:05
Speaker 1: Well, pause, instead of answering, just setting yourself on an
25:12
Speaker 1: answer course, what's the question? The question is when is
25:17
Speaker 1: this going to be over? Well, can you ask the
25:19
Speaker 1: question in a better way, in a more invitational way,
25:23
Speaker 1: what is best for my healing? Because that's the real problem,
25:27
Speaker 1: the real problem to solve is what is the best
25:30
Speaker 1: course of action for my healing, rather than the one
25:34
Speaker 1: we want to hear, which is how quickly will I heal? Right,
25:39
Speaker 1: that's the question we want to answer, Oh two weeks,
25:42
Speaker 1: I'll be back in a flash.
25:44
Speaker 3: And understandably so, right, because you had this event that
25:47
Speaker 3: this person hypothetically was looking forward to. In these instances,
25:52
Speaker 3: whether it is a hypothetically sprained angle or something else.
25:57
Speaker 3: What is your advice for getting to this place where
25:59
Speaker 3: you feel as though you can get to a radically
26:03
Speaker 3: simplifying mindset, Because this emotion is the problem.
26:10
Speaker 1: This is why we take care of our state first.
26:14
Speaker 1: So we get ourselves grounded. We get ourselves centered. Whether
26:17
Speaker 1: that's meditation or breathwork or the class, or dance or
26:21
Speaker 1: jogging or whatever it is. You get your state together,
26:25
Speaker 1: get centered. Next step, you know, you could get a
26:28
Speaker 1: big piece of paper out and take a pen and
26:31
Speaker 1: just vent about the problem.
26:33
Speaker 2: Write all of it down. Da da da da da.
26:36
Speaker 1: Then pull the piece of paper away from your face
26:38
Speaker 1: so that you have some more distance and start to
26:41
Speaker 1: cross out the extraneous words. We always want the essay
26:45
Speaker 1: to be a little bit longer than it needs to
26:47
Speaker 1: be because we have a fear of beginning, of really
26:51
Speaker 1: facing the true start right, So continue to cross things
26:56
Speaker 1: away until you're whittling down to the essential components. What
27:01
Speaker 1: are the manageable components that speak to the root of
27:06
Speaker 1: the true problem.
27:12
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Speaker 3: any order today. Curious what does journaling and writing look
29:12
Speaker 3: like in practice for you these days?
29:16
Speaker 1: I have one of those journals. It's called one line
29:20
Speaker 1: a day, and at the end of the day, I
29:24
Speaker 1: just write what's top of mind from what happened. And
29:27
Speaker 1: it's a five year journal, so I can sort of
29:29
Speaker 1: see what happened last year. And the reason why I
29:32
Speaker 1: do it like that is because I do feel like
29:34
Speaker 1: Alice in Wonderland. I feel like I've changed ten times,
29:37
Speaker 1: you know, in the last hour, and it's helpful for
29:39
Speaker 1: me to see the progress of my journey to reassure
29:43
Speaker 1: me and validate that I am growing, that I am learning.
29:47
Speaker 1: The other way that I journal is when I'm preparing
29:50
Speaker 1: to teach the class, which again is this combination of
29:54
Speaker 1: mindfulness and strength training. I will journal out it's going
30:00
Speaker 1: on for me, the things that I'm thinking about, the
30:03
Speaker 1: things that I want to create more space for, so
30:06
Speaker 1: that I'm not listening just to my mind, but I
30:09
Speaker 1: can open up into listening to my intuition. And if
30:12
Speaker 1: that word doesn't resonate with you, spirit, God, divinity, creativity, shakdi,
30:16
Speaker 1: you know however your vocabulary feels it. And journaling is
30:22
Speaker 1: one of those things where it takes the thought out
30:25
Speaker 1: of the hamster wheel of my mind and places it
30:31
Speaker 1: literally at a distance from me, so that I remember
30:35
Speaker 1: that I'm not my thought. I'm the one experiencing it.
30:38
Speaker 1: This is you know, spirituality, mindfulness, one oh one. But
30:41
Speaker 1: if I'm writing it and I can see it, then
30:44
Speaker 1: how can I be it?
30:46
Speaker 2: Oh?
30:47
Speaker 3: The power in that statement so so true. And the
30:52
Speaker 3: way that you talked about your process going into what
30:56
Speaker 3: some people think is just a simple act of teaching
31:00
Speaker 3: a class, right, it's really a testament to why I
31:08
Speaker 3: believe your class and the experience within that room is
31:12
Speaker 3: so special, right because it's something that you walk in
31:16
Speaker 3: there and you're not just there to help people move,
31:19
Speaker 3: although of course that's a byproduct, right.
31:21
Speaker 2: You are there to move the energy.
31:23
Speaker 3: You are there to deliver thought and be provoking, and
31:29
Speaker 3: I feel as though there aren't many opportunities like that,
31:33
Speaker 3: And that is also another reason why I look forward
31:36
Speaker 3: to keeping up with you regularly. Aside from again here
31:40
Speaker 3: I am complimenting you time and time again. I appreciate
31:45
Speaker 3: the steps here and the order of the steps right,
31:48
Speaker 3: like coming to sell first and then being able to
31:52
Speaker 3: get radically clear on what has to happen next.
31:56
Speaker 2: So where do we land then with our third thing?
32:00
Speaker 1: The third one is I would distill it down to say,
32:06
Speaker 1: seek input wisely. And here's what I mean by that.
32:14
Speaker 1: If you're only going to the yes men and the
32:17
Speaker 1: yes women in your life, whether that's externalized or internalized,
32:22
Speaker 1: whether that's the people around you that's going to say absolutely,
32:25
Speaker 1: that's great, or the part of you that's going to
32:28
Speaker 1: say the opposite. No, No, don't go there, don't try that.
32:31
Speaker 1: Remember when you failed. If you're only going to the
32:34
Speaker 1: folks who are just giving you one response repeatedly, that's
32:38
Speaker 1: not actual advice. That's getting what you want to hear
32:43
Speaker 1: instead of what you need to hear. So if you
32:47
Speaker 1: get input from different parts of the business, from different
32:54
Speaker 1: sectors of your life. Parent, friend, coworker, you know, therapist,
33:00
Speaker 1: if you get input from different voices within you, different
33:06
Speaker 1: identities that you hold. I have the identity of co CEO,
33:10
Speaker 1: I have the identity of fiance, I have the identity
33:13
Speaker 1: of daughter, a friend of sister, artist, of you know whatever.
33:18
Speaker 1: And can I host a party in which I'm seeking
33:23
Speaker 1: input from different parts of me and getting a different
33:27
Speaker 1: response based on who I'm choosing to share and validate
33:33
Speaker 1: my decision with. You know, you can't see your own eyes, right,
33:36
Speaker 1: we know this, So true objectivity is going to require
33:42
Speaker 1: a combination of outside perspective and that deep inner knowing.
33:47
Speaker 2: So yeah, seek input. Wisely, some people.
33:54
Speaker 1: Aren't aren't going to be listening for the sake of
33:58
Speaker 1: the problem that has to be solved. They're going to
34:00
Speaker 1: be listening according to their own agenda. So you really
34:05
Speaker 1: have to be thoughtful and conscious with who you you know,
34:13
Speaker 1: just like what you were saying, like press up against
34:16
Speaker 1: what do you.
34:17
Speaker 3: Do when it becomes clear that one of your stakeholders
34:22
Speaker 3: may not have your best interest in mind. I know
34:26
Speaker 3: you mentioned the phrase having their own agenda, right, and
34:30
Speaker 3: I think especially when you're in the midst of a
34:33
Speaker 3: difficult conversation a difficult hurdle moment or perhaps.
34:38
Speaker 2: As we age.
34:39
Speaker 3: There's so much conversation about friendships and evolving from friendships.
34:42
Speaker 3: So how do you know when to take the advice
34:46
Speaker 3: to heart versus move forward on your own path if
34:50
Speaker 3: it's different?
34:51
Speaker 2: Mm hm yep.
34:52
Speaker 1: So many things come up for me. One, you know,
34:57
Speaker 1: what's the old adage, if somebody shows you who they
34:59
Speaker 1: are of them the first time, you know. So, if
35:02
Speaker 1: you've got a stakeholder in your life personally or professionally,
35:05
Speaker 1: and you know that you can't trust them, don't trust them.
35:11
Speaker 1: But that takes practice because maybe you've been conditioned to,
35:15
Speaker 1: maybe you've been programmed to. The Other thing that we
35:19
Speaker 1: say at the class when we're developing our teachers is
35:23
Speaker 1: that all feedback is a gift, not all feedback needs
35:29
Speaker 1: to be taken. So the answer and you know, when
35:35
Speaker 1: I was in high school and into college, I have
35:38
Speaker 1: a BFA, I trained as an actor, and one of
35:41
Speaker 1: the things that my teachers used to say all the
35:43
Speaker 1: time is the only response to feedback is thank you,
35:48
Speaker 1: and then you do with it what you will. So,
35:50
Speaker 1: if you've got a stakeholder and you don't trust them,
35:52
Speaker 1: but you have to hear them out because of the
35:55
Speaker 1: nature of the relationship. Then you hear them say thank you,
36:01
Speaker 1: and that is a gift. I'm happy to hear your perspective.
36:05
Speaker 1: And then in the privacy of your own intuition, meeting
36:10
Speaker 1: the validation of the wise inputs, then you decide are
36:16
Speaker 1: you taking it or not?
36:18
Speaker 3: You decide. I love these three actionable tips here. Come
36:21
Speaker 3: back to self. Radically simplify, and then be careful who
36:25
Speaker 3: you seek advice or input from when it comes to
36:31
Speaker 3: then putting these into practice and moving through hard decisions.
36:38
Speaker 3: I know that something that has greatly helped me is
36:44
Speaker 3: doing myself the service of not attaching myself to a
36:50
Speaker 3: specific outcome.
36:52
Speaker 2: Have you experienced that? Oh?
36:55
Speaker 1: I mean the one that we are in is this
36:58
Speaker 1: practice in and of itself. The outcome I seek is
37:02
Speaker 1: for him to live a long life. And honey, I
37:07
Speaker 1: am attached. I am attached to that outcome. But what's
37:12
Speaker 1: been amazing is that Kevin has been a teacher for
37:17
Speaker 1: me in this regard because his relationship to what he's
37:21
Speaker 1: going through is ultimately I have some skin in this game.
37:29
Speaker 1: I have decisions, and I have will. And then there's
37:33
Speaker 1: another aspect of this that's not up to me. So
37:36
Speaker 1: I'm going to do the most that I can and then,
37:39
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know if this language resonates with
37:42
Speaker 1: you or your listeners, but like, but then you have
37:45
Speaker 1: to give it to God or you have to, you know,
37:48
Speaker 1: give it to source, give it to divinity, give it
37:50
Speaker 1: to the unknown, to uncertainty. And that's really really hard
37:55
Speaker 1: when it's something as when the stakes are as high
37:59
Speaker 1: as mortality. But it is that practice of give and take.
38:05
Speaker 1: I can bring myself to this hard decision as fully
38:09
Speaker 1: as I possibly can, and then something else, different power,
38:17
Speaker 1: a different seasonality, a different energy is going to have
38:20
Speaker 1: to meet me there.
38:23
Speaker 3: It's like doing the best you can with what you
38:25
Speaker 3: have in the moment and not judging that decision based
38:29
Speaker 3: on the things that you are without. Clearly, this is
38:34
Speaker 3: really truly a life or death situation for you. Oftentimes
38:39
Speaker 3: we deal with decisions that have less severity attached to them,
38:45
Speaker 3: and in making these difficult decisions, I have found it
38:51
Speaker 3: difficult to not judge myself based on the outcome. But
38:58
Speaker 3: over the years have come to understand that not getting
39:02
Speaker 3: the outcome that I'd hoped for, Let's say, if it's
39:05
Speaker 3: a specific job or it's nailing down a certain rate
39:09
Speaker 3: on a contract, or if it's being able to take
39:13
Speaker 3: a trip at this certain time of year, and then
39:15
Speaker 3: something pops up. I then have the opportunity to take
39:20
Speaker 3: these outcomes, although they are less desirable as information.
39:25
Speaker 2: And oh my God, has not hurts me.
39:29
Speaker 3: As I've moved forward knowing that it doesn't mean that
39:34
Speaker 3: I am one way or another way because I didn't
39:37
Speaker 3: get what I was after. It's just the information that
39:40
Speaker 3: I need so that when I go after the next
39:43
Speaker 3: thing that I'm excited about or try to face the
39:45
Speaker 3: next difficult hurdle moment, that I know what could happen
39:50
Speaker 3: and how I may handle that situation.
39:53
Speaker 1: So good, so good, bold, im talentsized, underscore, double click.
40:00
Speaker 1: But the other thing I would say, Emily that came
40:02
Speaker 1: to me when you were talking was, you know, we
40:05
Speaker 1: can practice in low steaks all the time. And the
40:10
Speaker 1: one the example I just thought of was cooking right. So,
40:14
Speaker 1: if you have a new recipe, get yourself together, If
40:19
Speaker 1: you right so, get yourself in order. If you are
40:22
Speaker 1: in a rush, if you are scared, if you are
40:25
Speaker 1: da da da da, You're probably gonna tip over the pans,
40:27
Speaker 1: the sauce is going to go everywhere. Okay, so get
40:29
Speaker 1: yourself grounded, radically, simplify, make your grocery list, choose when
40:36
Speaker 1: you're going to go to get your stuff, bring it back.
40:39
Speaker 1: What's the first thing you have to do? Boil the water.
40:44
Speaker 1: And once you get to that place where you are,
40:47
Speaker 1: you know, tasting the soup as it were. If you
40:51
Speaker 1: know that the person that you are sitting across from
40:54
Speaker 1: hate salt, and you put a lot of salt in it,
40:58
Speaker 1: well we already know what outcome you're going to. We
41:01
Speaker 1: already know the advice of the person sitting across the way.
41:03
Speaker 1: So see who you're bringing to dinner, you know, wisely,
41:08
Speaker 1: choose who you're inviting to dinner wisely, and then once
41:12
Speaker 1: you taste that soup, learn from what didn't didn't work,
41:18
Speaker 1: too much salt, not enough, and adapt. So that here's
41:21
Speaker 1: number four. Adapt based on your current reality, not your
41:26
Speaker 1: old one. It's not every other time you've made this soup.
41:31
Speaker 1: Based off of this experience of tasting your MINESTRONI learn
41:36
Speaker 1: from it.
41:37
Speaker 2: At first I thought we were making pasta, and I
41:39
Speaker 2: got excited. Well, Minestroni has post.
41:44
Speaker 3: On the note of adapting that also incorporates with who
41:49
Speaker 3: you are now. There are so many things that I
41:52
Speaker 3: go after that I experience, and it is so easy
41:57
Speaker 3: to compare how it feels now now or what's not
42:01
Speaker 3: happening now or xyz based on a previous version of myself.
42:08
Speaker 3: And while that can be frustrating at times, the mindset
42:11
Speaker 3: that I've chosen to adopt is that how lucky am
42:15
Speaker 3: I to be this version of myself now and to
42:18
Speaker 3: be able to then find the joys in a different way,
42:22
Speaker 3: not diminishing my accomplishments or what I am capable now
42:26
Speaker 3: because they capable of now because they look different.
42:30
Speaker 2: Different does not equate too bad.
42:34
Speaker 3: Hard stop, period exclamation point, done.
42:38
Speaker 1: Louder for the back, louder for the back, say it again,
42:43
Speaker 1: put it on a bumper sticker, Let's make t shirts.
42:46
Speaker 2: Different is not bad.
42:48
Speaker 3: And it's so challenging right to learn that lesson, especially
42:53
Speaker 3: when you liked whatever was happening in that previous version.
42:59
Speaker 2: We get attached too.
43:01
Speaker 3: Just because it's different doesn't mean it's bad.
43:05
Speaker 2: I got nothing to adswer that.
43:08
Speaker 3: Period exclamation point in these hurdle moments as we as
43:13
Speaker 3: we face them, and you know, we're putting all of
43:16
Speaker 3: these actionable tips into practice, there will be Trust me,
43:22
Speaker 3: I can promise you this a moment where the hurdle
43:27
Speaker 3: is behind us, or the circumstances have dramatically changed, and
43:32
Speaker 3: maybe the problem that you were trying to solve that
43:35
Speaker 3: the get go from the get go that was at
43:37
Speaker 3: one point so.
43:38
Speaker 2: Clear, isn't the same problem anymore.
43:42
Speaker 3: So once someone is on the other side of this challenge,
43:47
Speaker 3: do you have any advice for then implementing whatever it
43:52
Speaker 3: is that they've learned along the way.
43:56
Speaker 1: That's a great question. I personally have a I have
44:03
Speaker 1: a very unique relationship to the bathroom mirror because you know,
44:11
Speaker 1: one of the things that I really had to work
44:14
Speaker 1: on growing up is a better self image? Right who
44:18
Speaker 1: didn't Who wasn't?
44:20
Speaker 3: You know?
44:20
Speaker 2: Were we all teenagers at one point?
44:21
Speaker 1: Come on, I'm still there, Natalie girl, We're all We're
44:25
Speaker 1: working on it. We're working on it this entire lifetime.
44:29
Speaker 1: But one of the things that I started to do
44:31
Speaker 1: was a I created my own series of mirrors, art
44:36
Speaker 1: mirrors for this whole reason, stemming from this, where I
44:40
Speaker 1: would write the reminder on a sticky note and I
44:44
Speaker 1: would put it on the bathroom mirror, where I see
44:46
Speaker 1: it all the time, so that that thing that I learned,
44:49
Speaker 1: that mantra, that realization, that remembrance isn't it needs repetition
44:56
Speaker 1: in order to strengthen. Right, we say this at the
44:58
Speaker 1: class all the time. What you were eat, you strengthen.
45:02
Speaker 1: So be careful what you're repeating. Be careful, be full
45:05
Speaker 1: of care with what you're repeating. So if I just
45:09
Speaker 1: came into a new revelation, a new muscle was discovered,
45:13
Speaker 1: a new thought pattern that I want to foster and feed,
45:17
Speaker 1: I need to give it the gift of my attention. Well,
45:20
Speaker 1: every single day I look in the bathroom mirror twice
45:23
Speaker 1: a day brushing my teeth. So at minimum, right, so
45:27
Speaker 1: if I put the sticky note on the bathroom mirror,
45:30
Speaker 1: I at least know that there's a minimum of two
45:32
Speaker 1: touch points in my day where I'm strengthening the mantra,
45:36
Speaker 1: the reminder of the invitation, the blessing, whatever word speaks
45:39
Speaker 1: to you. And that's how I developed. It's this mirror series.
45:43
Speaker 1: It's called Make the Sun, and it's these art mirrors
45:46
Speaker 1: that are you know. My favorite one says choose kind eyes.
45:50
Speaker 1: And so every time I look in the mirror, I'm
45:52
Speaker 1: reminding myself choose to see in a kinder way, and
45:58
Speaker 1: that's my way of strengthing the newly formed lesson.
46:04
Speaker 3: That is a beautiful mantra toose kind eyes. And I
46:07
Speaker 3: have a feeling I'll be writing that myself in a
46:11
Speaker 3: what's that type of sharpie that rubs off dry erase, I'll.
46:15
Speaker 2: Be writing, get it in sharpie, girl.
46:17
Speaker 1: Oh.
46:19
Speaker 3: I don't think my rental my rental building would like
46:22
Speaker 3: that so much, but I really appreciate that.
46:27
Speaker 2: And it's a simple step, right.
46:29
Speaker 3: It doesn't need to be a complete life overhaul to
46:33
Speaker 3: integrate these lessons. And the other thing I will say
46:36
Speaker 3: that may have to happen before you even get to
46:39
Speaker 3: this point of taking the sharpie or the dry erase
46:42
Speaker 3: marker to your bathroom mirror is doing yourself the favor
46:47
Speaker 3: and often something that can be very difficult and reflect right.
46:53
Speaker 3: Sometimes when we get to the other side of these
46:56
Speaker 3: hard moments, the last thing that we want to do
46:59
Speaker 3: is go back over things that caused us pain. But
47:03
Speaker 3: in the execution of reflecting, and in the execution of
47:08
Speaker 3: taking the time to think about how you felt, is
47:13
Speaker 3: arguably the hardest part. You can then look at it
47:18
Speaker 3: with less emotion attached to it now that you're on
47:22
Speaker 3: the other side. Again, It's not easy, right, and no
47:26
Speaker 3: one expects it to be. But whether that exercise is
47:29
Speaker 3: done on your own, or with the help of friends,
47:32
Speaker 3: or perhaps with the help of a therapist or a
47:35
Speaker 3: life coach, however you choose to do that reflecting, I
47:38
Speaker 3: encourage you to do it because that is truly how
47:41
Speaker 3: you strengthen, and that is truly how you then take
47:44
Speaker 3: those lessons into whatever it is that you'll face moving forward.
47:49
Speaker 3: You are saying it, you are saying it. I actually
47:53
Speaker 3: cannot sing, Can I tell you that? People ask me
47:56
Speaker 3: all the times when they hear like this voice, they're
47:58
Speaker 3: like 'or.
47:59
Speaker 2: Just thank you? You do as well? I can't sing,
48:04
Speaker 2: not for the life of me. I can't even whistle.
48:06
Speaker 1: Actually, I often say that if I could have one
48:09
Speaker 1: superpower other people want to fly, I want to sing.
48:12
Speaker 2: I think singing as a superpower. I missed out on
48:15
Speaker 2: that one didn't get in that DNA line. Something I want.
48:18
Speaker 3: To double click on from earlier in our conversation was
48:21
Speaker 3: you were talking about, as you were navigating the initial
48:26
Speaker 3: blunt trauma of finding out about your partner's condition, that
48:30
Speaker 3: you were also learning leadership and leading at the same time.
48:37
Speaker 3: Flush that out a little bit for me and what
48:40
Speaker 3: that experience was.
48:41
Speaker 2: Like for you.
48:43
Speaker 1: I was one year into the new role of co
48:48
Speaker 1: CEO when this happened, and admittedly, I think I spent
48:54
Speaker 1: a lot of that first year bullied by my own
48:59
Speaker 1: impossible or syndrome and really had intuitions about things that
49:07
Speaker 1: I let either my mind or different opinions overshadow and eclipse.
49:15
Speaker 1: And it wasn't until this rude awakening of the diagnosis
49:21
Speaker 1: where I had to get strong inside myself and I was,
49:26
Speaker 1: you know, my heart had something to push up against
49:30
Speaker 1: right that I started to find a new level of
49:38
Speaker 1: my voice, of standing up from my voice, of using
49:43
Speaker 1: my voice, of meeting my intuition with data and bringing
49:50
Speaker 1: that to the team, and you know, practicing becoming much
49:54
Speaker 1: more objective, and practicing not people pleasing my way through
50:01
Speaker 1: a hard decision or through leadership, but rather doing exactly
50:07
Speaker 1: what we just talked about, getting centered, radically, simplifying choosing
50:11
Speaker 1: who I'm inviting to the dinner table or the boardroom
50:14
Speaker 1: or the decision or the conference room, and then standing
50:20
Speaker 1: up for that decision and seeing it through, getting behind it,
50:25
Speaker 1: and now you know, two years into it, so much
50:29
Speaker 1: you know, challenge and so much that's been harrowing. I
50:33
Speaker 1: feel more capable and more able to create a good
50:40
Speaker 1: environment for myself and for the team, to get it
50:46
Speaker 1: all out on the table, choose what's most strategic and execute.
50:53
Speaker 3: I want to talk a little bit about leading with vulnerability,
50:57
Speaker 3: truly like the act of leading, not just like starting
51:04
Speaker 3: with And I say this because I feel as though
51:07
Speaker 3: there are multiple perspectives on whether or not it can
51:13
Speaker 3: be a beneficial thing, and that there is such a
51:17
Speaker 3: thing if you choose to be vulnerable in a work
51:21
Speaker 3: capacity as responsible vulnerability, right, Can you share a little
51:28
Speaker 3: bit about what that has looked like in practice for
51:30
Speaker 3: you as you've really adopted and adapted into this role.
51:36
Speaker 2: Yeah.
51:36
Speaker 1: Absolutely, that's such a great question. I think if you
51:40
Speaker 1: are centered in your vulnerability, then your leadership becomes relatable
51:46
Speaker 1: and accessible. If you are caustic in your vulnerability, you're
51:52
Speaker 1: throwing it around, you're not centered in it. It's chaotic
51:56
Speaker 1: in the I don't know, then it's irresponsible vulnerable ability.
52:01
Speaker 1: Now you've just made your vulnerability somebody else's problem and
52:05
Speaker 1: they feel like they have to caretake potentially, And so
52:08
Speaker 1: it's about owning your sense of vulnerability rather than like
52:15
Speaker 1: proselytizing it. So how do you own your sense of vulnerability? Well,
52:20
Speaker 1: this is the same three steps, get your state and order. Okay,
52:25
Speaker 1: So let's drop out of the nervousness, the insecurity, let's
52:30
Speaker 1: drop into the truth is I don't know, let's find
52:34
Speaker 1: out together. But if you're walking around the office with
52:38
Speaker 1: your head cut off.
52:39
Speaker 2: I don't know, I don't know. What are we going
52:41
Speaker 2: to do?
52:42
Speaker 3: Now?
52:42
Speaker 1: You've just injected fear into all of your teammates. Yeah,
52:47
Speaker 1: if you center your feet, you take a deep breath,
52:49
Speaker 1: and you look somebody in the eye and you say
52:52
Speaker 1: with confidence, I don't know, let's find out together, that's
52:57
Speaker 1: entirely different.
53:00
Speaker 2: It is entirely different.
53:01
Speaker 3: And it also beckons the question, are there landmark moments
53:08
Speaker 3: that have taught you this approach previous to the last
53:16
Speaker 3: two years? What has helped you get to this place
53:21
Speaker 3: of radical understanding?
53:24
Speaker 2: Making mistakes?
53:27
Speaker 1: What's helped me get here is falling on my face
53:30
Speaker 1: and having to get back up of being the chicken
53:34
Speaker 1: with the head cut off, being the person who's overly
53:37
Speaker 1: protected intense, being the one who is completely overwhelmed. And
53:46
Speaker 1: it is that process. This is really full circle of reflecting.
53:50
Speaker 1: Once I'm out of the woods and out of the
53:52
Speaker 1: mist and I look back at that, you know, at
53:54
Speaker 1: the forest or the weather system. Wow, Okay, what happened there?
53:58
Speaker 1: Where did I lose myself? Where did I lose myself?
54:04
Speaker 1: And what tools do I have now to relocate myself?
54:09
Speaker 2: Yeah?
54:10
Speaker 1: And I'm grateful that, you know, we've really cultivated a
54:15
Speaker 1: kind and communicative and generous environment behind the scenes of
54:20
Speaker 1: the class because we can have those honest conversations, and
54:23
Speaker 1: I can go to certain teammates and say, like, let's
54:26
Speaker 1: do a Roses and Thorns. Let's go back into not
54:29
Speaker 1: only how that initiative moved through it, but how did
54:33
Speaker 1: we move with that initiative, and how can we get
54:37
Speaker 1: better and stronger and more conscious for the next one.
54:42
Speaker 3: January twenty twenty four, Roses and Thorns, you go first.
54:48
Speaker 1: So in the last couple of weeks, the thorn I
54:52
Speaker 1: would say is that I believed my doubt about myself.
55:00
Speaker 1: I had really a long essay about all the reasons
55:04
Speaker 1: why I wasn't good enough or should be worried. And
55:09
Speaker 1: for a while there I really let that color, my perception,
55:15
Speaker 1: and my rose is that I had pockets where the
55:21
Speaker 1: sun shone through that weather system, and it was the
55:26
Speaker 1: reminder and continually looking for that ray of light, really
55:31
Speaker 1: continually taking my attention and placing it on. I know
55:37
Speaker 1: that's not true. That's my old self realignment. My rose
55:42
Speaker 1: is my ability, my continued practice in realigning myself to
55:46
Speaker 1: what's true instead of what's fictional.
55:49
Speaker 3: Alignment a strong word for twenty twenty four. What about
55:53
Speaker 3: you give me your roses and thorns. My thorn is
55:57
Speaker 3: a little bit more literal. I would say there's a
56:01
Speaker 3: spill that I took running two to three weeks ago.
56:04
Speaker 3: I went flying and really did a doozy on my ribs.
56:12
Speaker 2: I think they're just bruised.
56:13
Speaker 3: Admittedly I didn't get imaging because every doctor and my
56:18
Speaker 3: physical therapist, so doctors and my physical therapists told me
56:23
Speaker 3: that you really do the exact same thing for a
56:25
Speaker 3: bruised rib as you do for a broken one. And
56:28
Speaker 3: I've slowly been healing, but still things like lying down
56:31
Speaker 3: and coughing don't feel stellar, and that in itself is frustrating.
56:37
Speaker 3: I was briefly quite concerned about being able to move
56:42
Speaker 3: forward with my plan to run a marathon not too
56:46
Speaker 3: far from now, and I'm very thankful that my body
56:50
Speaker 3: has enabled me to continue on with that plan. Either way,
56:54
Speaker 3: we certainly would have figured it out. My rose, I
56:58
Speaker 3: would say, has been rerealization of truly how supported I am.
57:06
Speaker 3: Aside from the unexpected trip, fall, whatever, launch into the
57:13
Speaker 3: abyss that we want to call it, I've been dealing
57:15
Speaker 3: with just some other health stuff that has been frustrating
57:20
Speaker 3: at times, in addition to just life is lifing, and
57:24
Speaker 3: I am so grateful for the individuals that are in
57:28
Speaker 3: my corner everywhere I turn, relationships that are so real
57:35
Speaker 3: and so pure and so beautiful. And the older I get,
57:40
Speaker 3: the more mature and wonderful.
57:42
Speaker 2: And deep they get.
57:44
Speaker 3: And for that, I am so so so just blessed
57:49
Speaker 3: to say.
57:49
Speaker 1: Out loud, that's so beautiful. And Emily, that fictional story
57:56
Speaker 1: that you told us about the gal who took a
57:58
Speaker 1: spill just you.
57:59
Speaker 3: Know, asking for a friend, Oh my god, fact versus fiction, right, Like,
58:04
Speaker 3: let's just pretend I drummed that three nights ago and
58:06
Speaker 3: it didn't really happen. I'm reminded of it every single
58:09
Speaker 3: day when I like sneeze or call or try to
58:13
Speaker 3: lay down in Shivasna.
58:14
Speaker 1: Oh well, truly, Emily, you are one of those beacons
58:19
Speaker 1: of light and that support system and that friend. I
58:22
Speaker 1: know that I could knock on your door and you'd
58:24
Speaker 1: give me the real, real And I'm just so grateful
58:28
Speaker 1: to be to have crossed paths with you in this
58:31
Speaker 1: lifetime and to be in conversation with you really truly.
58:34
Speaker 2: Oh wait, I forgot.
58:36
Speaker 1: I wanted to offer your listeners a month on the
58:41
Speaker 1: Class's digital platform if they wanted to try it.
58:44
Speaker 2: What a sweetie, How nice are you?
58:47
Speaker 1: It would be a gift if you care to check
58:50
Speaker 1: it out the class dot com backslash Natalie and at
58:55
Speaker 1: a l I E and.
58:57
Speaker 2: Check it out. Thirty days to practice your practice.
59:01
Speaker 3: You're already doing my job for me here as we
59:04
Speaker 3: wind down, I would be remiss if I didn't ask
59:07
Speaker 3: you how's Kevin doing these days?
59:09
Speaker 2: Oh?
59:10
Speaker 1: Wow, yeah, thank you for tying up that looseen, because
59:12
Speaker 1: that would have been maybe potentially scary. He is healing,
59:17
Speaker 1: his cancer is shrinking, it is retracting, and we have
59:22
Speaker 1: our mind is set on full recovery, full remission, and
59:27
Speaker 1: we're going to get there.
59:28
Speaker 3: And now you have a few thousand understatement, people that
59:33
Speaker 3: are hoping that you get there too.
59:35
Speaker 2: I'm so happy to hear that, Natalie.
59:37
Speaker 3: For those that don't follow along with you just yet,
59:40
Speaker 3: give us your info. How do they do that? How
59:42
Speaker 3: do they keep up with you? How do they follow
59:44
Speaker 3: the class? We want to know it all. Bless your heart.
59:46
Speaker 1: On Instagram at the Class and on Instagram at this
59:52
Speaker 1: is Natalie Beautiful. I'm over at Emiabadi and at Hurdle
59:57
Speaker 1: Podcast Another Hurdle Conquer Catch you guys next time