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5-MINUTE FRIDAY: It's OK To 'Go Slow' & Be A Beginner · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:21
  Speaker 1: Hey, Hey, Emily, A body here coming to you from
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: my hotel room in Shamani in France. I have been
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: here all week for ut MB, which stands for the
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: Ultra Trail Dumont Blanc. It's a single stage mountain ultra
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: marathon and no I am not here to run it.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: I was invited to come out by the good people
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: at Strava, and we have had ourselves quite a time.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: Aside from doing all of the touristy things like eating
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: baguettes and raclette and fun too and gelato oh aka,
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: just eating my way through this adorable little town, I
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: also went paragliding yesterday, which was absolutely phenomenal. A huge
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: thank you to my friends that work at Hoka for
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: inviting me to come and do that. And I also
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: went on a very technical They called it a trail run,
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: but I would beg to differ. I would say it
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: was certainly a hike. We went on a really beautiful
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: trail run slash hike this morning in which I was
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: actually like hiking up the mountain aside next to Michael Horbath,
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: who is the CEO and co founder of Strava. It
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: was me and him tag teaming our way up there.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: It was super challenging, and that's exactly what I want
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: to talk about for five Minute Friday this week. There
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: were so many times during the hike on Thursday that
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: I just felt so like, what am I doing here?
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: I looked around me, and it seemed as though everyone
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: else was very comfortable, almost as though hiking is clearly
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: a part of their regular routine. Now, it's not so surprising.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: I would think that you know me pretty well by
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: now for listening to the show. I am not an
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: avid hiker, and I went out onto these trails literally
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: thinking you were going to do like a trail run. Well, no,
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: I mean we gained over I think it was thirteen
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: hundred feet of elevation, which some people listening to this
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: might be like, Oh, that's not too bad. It felt
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: like summoning Everest to me and literally at times like
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: scaling rocks with holds that had been put there by
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: hikers before us, and really really challenging. At times. I
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: looked around me and I was like, I need to
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: be the person that like steps off to the side
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: so that someone else who may be more well versed
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: in this type of terrain and if they want to
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: like move a little bit faster than me, I should
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: let them go by. So we're on the descent. So
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: we made it to the top. We stopped at this
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: beautiful lake and we're on our way down, and I
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: noticed that the guide who I am following, he is
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: kind of running down this like winding path which is
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: super rocky. And for me, as I'm trying to make
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: sure that I'm taking care of my feet, my prime
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: goal right now is to make it to the starting
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: line of my marathon in October, I didn't want to
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: be too risky, so I was just trying to move
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: a little cautiously, and I noticed that he was moving
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: at a faster clip than I. So I went to
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: go step to the side and I turned back and
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: there were two women coming up behind me, and I said, hey,
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: if you want to go ahead, I'm just going to
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: take a second. And she said to me one of them,
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: she said, well, are you taking a second because you
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: feel like you're not going fast enough? Because if that's
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: the case, you are doing just fine and keep going
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: at your own pace. She continued on and said, I
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: have felt that way before. I can totally relate. I
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: really needed that because that's exactly why I was pulling
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: off to the side. I felt as though I was
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: holding others back, and I didn't want to be that person.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: And it made me think about how often like that
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: was the story that I was telling myself. The story
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: that I was telling myself was that I was inconveniencing
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: everyone around me. But the reality was is that no
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: one was paying attention to how I was making my
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: way down the mountain, and I wasn't inconveniencing anyone around me.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: But it's a prime example of me being my own
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: biggest critic and me assuming that because I'm not a veteran,
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: because this isn't something I'm doing frequently, that I'm not
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: doing it good enough. It was a reminder for me
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: that whatever you have to give any certain task in
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: the moment, that is good enough, and that showing up
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: within itself was a victory to begin with. And so
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: I did it. I climbed the mountain, I submitted the mountain,
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: and I made it way back down and I had
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: an apparel sprits which tasted extra lif and that was that,
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: and I felt really accomplished and really proud of myself.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: It is so easy to be your own biggest critic,
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: But don't let that little voice in your head prevent
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: you from doing things at your own pace, going after
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: your potential on your own timeline. And maybe most importantly,
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: don't be afraid to be a beginner, because really you
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: only get to be a beginner once, and everyone around
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: you is a beginner at something. So maybe my prompt
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: for you this week, in fact, this is it. What
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: is something that you have wanted to begin. Maybe it's
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: a new hobby, a new activity, and maybe that little
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: voice is the thing that's holding you back. What is
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: something that you want to begin? And maybe that little
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: voice has been the thing that's holding you back, And
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: now is your opportunity to say ssh not now? All right,
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: all right now.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: A listener question, Hi, Emily, I've heard you mentioned on
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: the podcast a couple times that you're working with a
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: life coach, and I was wondering if you would be
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: willing to talk a little bit more about it. How
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: did you decide that you wanted to work with a
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: life coach, How did you find a life coach, what
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: qualifications did you look for, and just what your overall
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: experience of life coaching has been, Like I know you've
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: seen a therapist in the past, so I'm curious to
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: know how it compares to therapy and what advice you'd
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: give to someone if they're wondering whether they should find
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: a therapist or find a life coach. Anything you'd be
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: willing to share about the experience would be really appreciated.
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: Thanks so much. Let the podcast.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: Hey, Hey, good question. I have been getting many messages
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: and a few emails about this, in fact, so I'm
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: happy to differentiate between a life coach and a therapist
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: properly here. So the biggest difference between therapy and life
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: coaching is really the focus of the work. Therapy focuses
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: on mental health and emotional healing, so you're probably going
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: to talk a lot about things that have happened in
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: the past and traumas and how those impact the way
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: that you go about your life right now, whereas life
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: coaching is really really homed in on setting and achieving goals.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: I found my life coach through a referral from a
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: good friend, and I am super satisfied with the work
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: that we've been doing. I do feel, as a goal
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: oriented individual that this really ties together the emotional and
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: mental support that I'm looking for, while also helping me
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: think ahead and focus on the goals that I am after.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: A really big focus for me when I started seeing
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: my life coach, and this is something I hear often,
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: is that I wanted to get unstuck in some of
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: the different aspects of my life, both personally and professionally,
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: and so working with her has really helped me to
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: do that, has really helped me get out of my
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: own way in pursuit of the things that excite me
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: and light my soul on fire a little bit. Typically speaking,
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: therapy often doesn't have a set end date, so it's
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: not a time limited process, whereas a lot of coaching
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: clients work with a life coach for a certain duration
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: of time to work on a specific goal. Again, to
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: reiterate kind of the point of life coaching, coaching really
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: focuses on improving the here and now, let's say it.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: So the goal in coaching, as opposed to therapy isn't
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: really to go back and address it or heal it
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: or change it. Instead, some past things are just referenced
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: in relation to what you are trying to implement moving forward. Lastly,
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: on what to look for in a life coach is
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: that if that is something that you are interested in.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: There are so many different educational avenues that one can
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: go down to pursue working as a life coach. There's
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: no one governing body that says this is a good certification,
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: this isn't a good certification. I really liked that the
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: individual that I work with went through the IPEC program,
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: which is one I've mentioned here before. It is the
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: one that I am currently enrolled in myself at the moment.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: It wasn't and is not a I'm going to go
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: take a course for a weekend and suddenly I'm a
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: life coach thing. It's actually, you know, between seven and
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: eight months of coaching work involving tons and tons of
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: hours of practice and schooling. And that makes me comfortable
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: knowing that I am working with an individual who has
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: that next level skill set and has really put in
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: the time and effort to understand how to help others
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: level up to their own potential. And so aside from
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: checking into what credentials they may have and where they
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: studied or learned their skill set, I also would just
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: say that the right fit for you is really going
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: to be also based on personality. So find someone that
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: makes you feel comfortable, that makes you feel empowered, and
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: that makes you feel as though you are ready to
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: tackle the things that are ahead of you. I think
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: that's it for this week. Another hurdle conquered. I'll catch
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: you guys next time.