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From Healing To Living · The Spiritual Shitshow Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: Hello and welcome back to the Spiritual Shit Show.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_01: My name is Julie Wynne, and I don't know about you, but I am definitely feeling the speed of the energy that is already 2026.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_01: So, with that in mind, I will continue to share what I am processing and what is being revealed to me in my own healing uh journey in the hopes that it supports you wherever you are in life.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: And we may be dropping these a lot quicker because things are moving quickly.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_01: Every morning I have my morning ritual and I meditate and I breathe and I consciously connect into the frequencies that I want to bring in for my day.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_01: So my magic morning rituals.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_01: We'll talk about that on another podcast.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_01: And journal.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_01: And what I'm realizing is, you know, I keep saying it's been my nine years, nine years spiritual shit show, nine years of healing.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_01: And when the nine year cycle closed for 2025, it was this realization of like, okay, if I continue to heal these things, I'm just beating the old drum now.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_01: So what is next?
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_01: And that's what I want to talk to you about today is after the healing, learning to live again.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_01: It's where I am.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_01: And it is, it's interesting.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_01: Every life experience has to be experienced and embodied.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_01: There's so many of us, self-included, that for so many years, I understood everything that I was reading in books.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_01: I could retell the what was happening.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_01: I understood the spiritual teachings, but I didn't yet live it.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_01: And your life is meant to be lived and experienced, not just to acquire wisdom and knowledge.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: It has to be embodied.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: After you've done the work, you've processed the memories, you understand your patterns, you can explain why you became who you became.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_01: And there can still feel like an unsettling.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_01: You're not broken, there's nothing in crisis.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_01: It just all now kind of feels unanchored.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_01: This phase after healing, where the real integration, embodiment, anchored wisdom becomes lived.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_01: Healing and living are not the same thing.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: And it feels like in my own personal journey, I am learning how to live.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: In the healing phase, many of us have gone deep.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: We've done the inner child work, the shadow work, the family constellation work.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_01: And if you're unfamiliar with family constellations, that's the process that helps us to see the emotional roles and loyalties we unconsciously carry within and from our families and ancestry.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_01: It's really cool work.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_01: In the healing phase, we learn compassion for ourselves, self-forgiveness.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, it's really tough.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_01: We realize we weren't crazy.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_01: We were just adaptive.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_01: Healing answers the question: why did I become this way?
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_01: Why did I react that way?
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_01: Why did I think that way?
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_01: And without the shame and the spiritual gaslighting, we learn, whoa, kind of isn't that cool.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not broken.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_01: I wasn't crazy.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_01: I was just learning how to adapt, how to survive.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_01: And then once you move through all of those layers, layers and layers of healing, layers of personal understanding, layers of ahas, layers, healing takes time.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_01: And eventually, love transmutes all of that.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_01: And a new bloom can be bloomed.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_01: A new phase can begin.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_01: And before that, new bloom and exhale and peace can arrive.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_01: There's like a little life review phase.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_01: There comes a time when awareness turns inward in a different way.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_01: And this awareness isn't to understand your wounds, but to see yourself compassionately and lovingly and deeply as a human.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_01: As a human.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: You remember moments you were reactive, jealous, defensive, shut down, controlling, hurtful.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_01: And again, it's not because you were bad, but you were more than likely protecting, surviving, adapting.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_01: When we can review our life this way, and usually people experience a life review at the end of life, it can bring intense feelings.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_01: And again, this is where self-forgiveness becomes necessary.
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_01: And the self-forgiveness doesn't excuse any behavior.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: And again, it's not to bring in more shame for you, but it's all to help you to release the identity, to release the shame that's hidden within the body, to release the guilt that's hidden within the body, to release these subconscious, like, I want to hide my face, and I don't want to talk about that, that's too painful to talk about that.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'm ashamed feelings that are literally still being carried in your body.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: And if you keep carrying subconsciously who you were, your nervous system stays organized around a past that already ended.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_01: What we're looking here is how can I integrate healing?
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_01: How can I embody fully and love fully all parts of myself?
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: Who am I?
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: And what does real freedom look like?
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_01: And then we get to this part where we have to stabilize.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_01: After we do this very shadowy work, you know, and we look back and we're like, gosh, I did that, or I reacted that way, or I withheld love, or I was stubborn, or, and then you practice self-forgiveness and releasing yourself from the old habitual energies.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_01: You release yourself from the shame, the guilt.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_01: And then you have to stabilize it.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: You're not, and in this phase, it's like you're not processing constantly.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_01: You're not having massive breakthroughs every week.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_01: You're not searching for the next realization.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_01: You're not beating the drum of the old drum.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_01: And the mind goes, Am I stuck?
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: Am I avoiding?
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: Am I numb?
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_01: What do I do next?
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_01: Your nervous system has to learn that it doesn't have to scan for danger anymore.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_01: Your nervous system has to feel what it feels like to be safe in the here and now.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_01: Your nervous system has to learn that it doesn't have to fix itself, that there is nothing wrong with you.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_01: You are not broken.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_01: Your nervous system has to learn safety, love, and how to anchor and exist beautifully in the present moment.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_01: I am learning that healing releases the past, and the stage that I am in now is this stabilization and anchoring into the things that are true for me now teaches the body that the present is safe.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_01: This is the bridge from healing to living.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: You teach your body how to live without habitual survival strategies.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: What I am learning is that this happens through repetition, not insight.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_01: I have to create new habits for myself.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_01: I have to create action.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_01: I have to create things that are going to continually teach my nervous system that I'm good.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_01: I'm good.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_01: That the healing work is done.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_01: And the living is what is needed now.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_01: If this makes sense, and you're kind of in that same boat of like, oh, I can really realize I've done a lot of healing work.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_01: I've done a lot of internal work.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: I've done a lot of self-awareness work.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: What's next?
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_01: Here's some things that not only help stabilize the nervous system, but help you to keep yourself anchored into the present moment.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_01: Number one is an orientation practice.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_01: I learned this in somatic therapy course that I was taking.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: And when I was learning this, I was like, whoa, I am really seeing how my nervous system does not like this practice at all.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_01: Everything inside of me wanted to shake and tremble and run.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_01: It's really simple.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: Just sit and let your eyes look around the room and just notice what you see.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: I see the plant sitting on the floor.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_01: I see the TV crooked on the wall.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_01: I see my computer screen.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_01: I see.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_01: Just begin to notice.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: And then pause.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_01: And then what are some things that you can begin to notice that you hear?
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: You don't hear my dog tap dancing in the background.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: And then bring an awareness to your breath.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_01: And where is my breath in my body?
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_01: Is it shallow?
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_01: Is it kind of stuck at the top of my lungs?
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_01: Is it deep?
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_01: And then notice where does my body want to rest?
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_01: Does my body want to kind of pull forward?
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: Is it on guard?
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_01: Can it settle back and relax?
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: And then just remind yourself in this moment I am safe.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: Safe enough.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: And then what this orientation practice does is interrupts the survival brain that keeps searching for problems, that keeps scanning for safety.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: Another thing that you can do is begin to change, reframe, you know, that I don't have to change it, but what happens if I just soften towards it?
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_01: When can I notice in my life that I am really gripping and on guard?
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_01: And what happens if I change my orientation to it?
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_01: If I can look at a situation from a different angle, or simply if I can just with before I react, practice softening my body first.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_01: Before I make a decision, can I soften my body?
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_01: What does this mean?
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe I sit back in my chair, connect into my body before I have a reaction.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe I just pay attention to my jaw and soften my jaw.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_01: Or I can soften my eyes for a minute, or I can, you know, connect into my belly and let my stomach soften.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_01: So this is a gentle embodiment practice.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_01: And when we can get into our body, we can change the habits.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_01: And again, remind the nervous system that we're not changing, we're not fixing, we're not protecting, we're living.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_01: Haha.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_01: And how do you live?
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_01: I live within my body.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_01: This is also such a beautiful practice because the body needs endings to stop carrying weight forward.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_01: When we have the realizations in our mind of like, whoa, I realized or I remembered.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_01: And the work has to travel and integrate through the body.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_01: So the body knows that it's safe, that the body knows that it doesn't have to carry it anymore, it doesn't have to protect you.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_01: We're teaching the body that it's over, and we don't need to hang on to it anymore.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_01: Another practice is in the morning, like, what is it that I want to feel today?
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_01: And really connecting into, and what is it that I need before I get into what the world is requiring of me?
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_01: The things that I have to get done, which we all know you don't really have to get any of it done.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_01: Things, what do I, what do I really need to focus my energy on today?
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_01: Where do I have control in my day?
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_01: But more importantly, how this is so important, listen to me.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_01: How do I want to feel today?
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_01: Period.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_01: And I want to remind you that you have that much control over your day.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_01: How do I want to feel today?
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_01: Do I want to feel productive?
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_01: Do I want to feel alive?
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_01: Do I want to feel happy?
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_01: Do I want to feel at ease?
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_01: Do I want to feel restful?
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_01: Do I want to feel slow?
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_01: Do I want to feel how do I want to feel today?
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_01: How do I want my day to go?
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_01: And again, you have that much power within you.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_01: If I could record this podcast all over, I'd put that number one every morning, hand on heart.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_01: How do I want to feel today?
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: How do I want to feel today?
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_01: You are the co-creator of your life.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_01: You are the one who is the authority of you.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_01: How do you want to feel?
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_01: Beautiful.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: And then I want to leave you with healing helps you understand your life.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_01: And when we can begin to bring in practices that help us not only understand ourselves, but help us remember who we are and what we came here to do, how we came here to be of service to other people, to ourselves, to experience life, to create, to be in joy.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_01: You're reminded you don't need another breakthrough.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_00: You just need practices that help you build safety, creativity, community, love.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_00: So maybe this week, and you can even start today.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_01: What can I recognize within myself that is complete?
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_01: What are the areas within myself that are complete?
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have to ruminate over the past.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have to ruminate over the stories.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have to beat the old drum.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: Where can I just really lovingly hold that and know that it is complete?
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_01: And then how can I bring my awareness and orient to the now and what's inside of me now and what's in front of me now?
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_01: And then how can I soften?
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_01: Soften into safety, reminding self that you are not becoming a new person.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_01: You are allowing the person who no longer has to survive, who no longer has to heal, who no longer has to feel certain ways about yourself.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: You're giving yourself permission to finally arrive.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_01: Whole, complete, lovingly powerful.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_01: And today, let life be lived, practiced.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe just for today.
• 18:40
  SPEAKER_01: You don't have to analyze anything, you don't have to heal anything, you don't have to work so hard to prove your worth.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_01: You can just allow and allow life to take a breath through you.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for being here, sending you so much love.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_01: Till next time.