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Narcissists are Identity Thieves · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on, Beautiful people.
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  Today we're talking about how narcissists and toxic people are
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  identity thieves. If you're new here, my name is
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  Lee Hammond. I'm a clinically diagnosed
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  narcissist and welcome to episode 997 of the Narcissist
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  Code. Boom.
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  Welcome back. Welcome back.
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  Welcome back, folks. Welcome back.
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  Yes. So identity theft is identity
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  theft is a crime gym. Millions of people will suffer
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  every year. Where'd they come from?
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  Where'd they come from? If you if y'all don't know where
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  they'll come from, we can't. Like, look, we can't be friends
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  all here. We can't do it.
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  You know what I mean? Identity theft is a crime gym.
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  Where do they come from? First person that listed is
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  I'll. I'll pin the comment.
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  I'll check the I know I'll check out my comments.
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  I'll check. I'll check in many comments as I
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  possibly can. But yes, narcissistic people are
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  identity thieves. Y'all they will like.
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  One thing that I feel like me myself as a narcissist I lack is
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  for a long time is a true identity.
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  Like I didn't know who I was and then still nowadays do I
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  struggle with that now? Yeah, I still struggle with
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  that. For right now, as I'm speaking
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  to you, you know, as I'm speaking to you right now, I
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  still struggle with my identity. I still struggle with who I am.
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  And you know where I go from here.
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  I still struggle with that type of stuff.
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  Y'all. And that's not me trying to play
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  the victim. Y'all know that's not my style.
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  I mean, I'm not, I'm not victim mode, Lee Hammock, That's not
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  me. But what I struggle with the
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  most is having that mindset that like I don't know who I am.
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  I wake up, don't you know, wake up sometimes don't have a
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  purpose. A lot of narcissists lack
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  purpose, and without that purpose you can't.
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  It's hard to have an identity. Why am I here?
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  What do I, what am I supposed to do?
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  You know, what's the reason for me to get up out of the bed
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  every single day and move forward?
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  I don't know who I am. So what a narcissist does, like
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  a pickpocket, is they still they come.
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  They steal the identity of people around them, or they
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  steal certain personality characteristics and traits of
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  the people that are around them. That happens quite a bit.
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  Y'all narcissistic people will steal the identity and traits of
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  a lot of people that are around them.
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  This happens with this, this, this part of the thing that
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  happens. Y'all like this truly happens
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  quite a bit like this. One of those things that happens
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  all the time. Like, if you've been around a
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  narcissist long enough, you know that a lot of time they will
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  start you acting like you. They will start to talk like
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  you. They will start to walk like
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  you. They will start to, you know,
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  take on your friend groups and have your mannerisms and things
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  like that. You have been around a lot of
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  narcissists that have done this. You know, in this, it could be
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  so subtle, you know, they might start to dress like you.
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  It can be so subtle. You're like, damn, I have those
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  same jeans. I got that same shirt.
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  Damn, dude. I got that same.
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  I got that same hat. Damn, you look like me.
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  You just like me. Look at you.
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  Cool, cool cool guy. Cool guy alert.
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  Cool Guy alert. You know, it seems funny and
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  things like that. It might seem, you know, you
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  might catch you off guard, but that's the mindset of a lot of
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  narcissistic people. We have this dynamic where we
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  don't, like I said, we lack identity, so we take it from
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  other people. Like I said this before, I've
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  said this before in a lot of my videos from when I first got
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  started, that the personality that you see is really just an
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  accumulation of the of the characteristics that I've seen
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  in people, seen in other people that I've either been jealous of
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  or that I admired. If I admire a personality, a
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  personality characteristic of yours, I take it, I add it to
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  myself. If I'm jealous of a personality
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  characteristic of yours or a trait of yours, I take it, make
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  it part of myself. At my essence, at my core, I'm
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  funny. You know, that's my humor is my
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  thing, yo. I'm just a I'm a funny guy.
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  If that's my identity. I'm a funny guy that talks about
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  narcissism online. You see what I'm saying?
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  But so that's that's one thing I haven't taken from other people
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  is the humor. I've added things around it.
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  The humor is at the core, right? The humor, You know, my humorous
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  message is at the core, But everything else is like the
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  shell around it, kind of like a lollipop, you know, like a
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  lollipop, like a jock. No, not like Jolly Rancher.
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  How many lick does it take till you get to the sit up?
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  Yeah, lollipop with the gum in the middle.
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  You know, the gum in the middle is my humor, you know, So I know
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  in my cool heart who I am, but I'm just have added different
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  pieces throughout my life. Like, my friend was a real
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  estate agent, so I became a real estate agent.
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  You know, I had people who started acting.
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  So I started doing acting. You know, I have a lot of people
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  around me to start doing different things.
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  So I started doing different things.
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  Like I I kind of follow, you know, I kind of.
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  I'm not a follower, but I take things.
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  I'm I I became a better real estate agent than them, you
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  know. But I take things that I like
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  and I make them part of me. I I feel like it's in my mind.
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  It's like I see a person. I have the characteristics of
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  yours that makes me envious of you.
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  I take. I feel like.
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  I like why do you deserve that. So I take that from you.
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  I make it myself and I just I'm I refine it to make it a better
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  version of which what I saw in you that's my mind that's how my
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  mind works. So I've always kind of felt like
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  an identity thief. I was just like I'm I really
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  once I became aware, you know, of what I was doing and you know
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  over the years through therapy or what not, I, I kind of
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  tapered off doing that because I had to ask myself why?
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  Why am I taking the identity of these other people?
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  Why am I taking it? Why am I taking their person
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  out? The characteristics and traits.
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  Why am I doing the things that they do.
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  Why am I taking, you know their hobbies and likes and this like
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  why am I doing this? You know I start listening to
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  country music because people listen.
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  I'm I'm gonna fit into this crowd right here.
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  You know a lot of times they do it to blend in, you know,
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  because it's easier to blend in when you have like causes.
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  You know, when you have, like, you know, similar hobbies,
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  similar causes, similar things that get you excited, similar
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  things that upset you, you know? So that's one of the things that
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  a lot of narcissists will take on.
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  Like they don't even believe in certain movements or certain
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  things. They just started to do it
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  because it makes them fit in. A lot of narcissistic people who
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  don't have an identity or who lack identity will start doing
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  things just to fit in, you know. And when they fit into a group
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  or whatever they start to take on, they start to take the
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  characteristics from the people that are in that group.
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  It happens on a it happens on a big on a wide scale.
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  It's one of those things that you, if you dealt with the
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  narcissist, you know, narcissistic Co workers,
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  narcissistic bosses, you know, narcissistic siblings, parents,
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  friends, partners, spouses, whoever it is, you know, you
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  know what I'm saying? Like, they change their hair
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  color to match yours. They grow dreads.
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  You know, like my brother, my twin brother had dreads.
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  I never thought about getting dreads.
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  I had braids, but he had dreads on it.
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  Damn, I like dreads. So I started having dreads.
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  He cut his off a long time ago. I've had my dreads since 2008.
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  Y'all 16 years of dreads. What the hell?
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  What I just. Realized it.
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  Dang this month. Right here will be 16 years of
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  me having dreads. What?
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  Do y'all think it's a time to go?
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  It's a time for the dreads to go.
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  It's a time for them to go. It's been 1616 in them things.
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  I just thought about it. 16 long years of me having these dreads.
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  And the the way I measured that y'all is because I got them like
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  3 months before my son was born. His 16th birthday is in May and
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  I got these dreads 3 months in February of O 8.
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  So yeah, it's been 16 years. Oh my goodness.
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  Oh my goodness. I just thought about that.
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  Y'all y'all. I know y'all like when I'd be
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  having these epiphanies when I'm on, when I'm online with you.
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  So I'm going to do the rest of my video of my hair now.
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  Shout out to 16 years of growth. They're super long too, though
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  off the camera you see. But that's how it goes though.
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  Y'all. So I want, I want people to
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  understand, like if you're dealing with a narcissistic
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  person, you can notice, like if you married to one, like
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  everybody's not leaving a narcissistic person.
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  Like I said, I know everybody can't leave.
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  Some people don't want to leave. But this is my mindset on
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  everything right here. You can't like, and this is what
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  I'll say, you can't like just if you with them, just take a step
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  back and notice what they do, Notice who they You try to
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  figure out who they are. That's like a goal.
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  Just look at them, notice them, analyze them and see who they
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  really are. You know, because that's how
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  love bombing works. They they take all your
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  personality characteristics and they get, they mirror them back
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  to you. Like narcissists walk around.
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  It's like once we become narcissists, they give us like a
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  little mirror and we walk around.
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  We walk around holding, holding it up our life, you know,
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  holding up, holding up a mirror to people to show, to show them
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  back the best versions of themselves or better, you know,
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  things. We are super, we're super
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  interested in the same things that you're interested in.
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  Look, here's a mirror holding the mirror up to you.
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  That's what happens. They hold a mirror up.
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  You walk around with like a little mini mirrors and what not
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  to hold up and hold around, you know, just to hold down and
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  stuff like that. So that happens quite a bit
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  within these spaces. So if you're dealing with a
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  narcissistic person, figure out who they are.
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  See, because like they were. They are not who they were in
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  the beginning. That's not who they were in the
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  beginning of a relationship dynamic with their narcissist,
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  that's not who they really are. You know, That's not who they
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  really are. That's why they a lot of times
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  they want to rush and speed and try to marry you and get into a
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  relationship with you really fast because of that right
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  there. Because of the speed, because of
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  the, you know, because of that right there, they want to rush
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  the relationship space because you might see who they really
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  are because they know they can't hold up this mask.
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  But for so long, like you going to see through who you going to
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  see who you want to see them for who they really are.
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  So they try to rush the relationship, Hey, let's move in
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  quickly. Let's get married.
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  Let's do this, Let's do that. Let's be, let's become official,
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  let's start dating, let you know, meet my family.
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  They want to do that because they know that they're mirroring
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  back personality traits that are not theirs.
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  And once they feel like they have you, that's when the mask
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  comes off and they become who they really are.
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  You know, kind of basically like a blank slate.
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  You see this y'all if you go out into a, if you go with a
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  narcissist onto a crowd of people, watch who they watch how
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  they change, watch how they change.
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  They like they'll change in front of your eyes.
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  Like they're not the the the same person that left the house
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  with you to drive to this event is not the same person that's
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  walking around this event and and it won't be the same person
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  that gets in the car after the event with you and drives home.
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  You'll see. Watch.
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  The person I have to change. Watch how they behave.
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  Watch how they they act. You'll see this in real life, in
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  real time, when you're dealing with a toxic, narcissistic
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  person. It happens all the time.
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  Y'all, so thank you for tuning in.
• 11:03
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• 11:07
  The link is in the the the link is in the description of every
• 11:10
  video and podcast I do. I'm releasing my first video
• 11:13
  series and community here in the next few, like the next week.
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  I just finished right now. I have a video series coming out
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  about the sevens. It's called Understanding the
• 11:24
  Seven Stages of a Narcissistic Relationship.
• 11:26
  Just understanding it, why you were chosen, why you were
• 11:30
  devalued, why you were discarded, why you were or were
• 11:33
  not hoovered. It's got yeah it's it's a really
• 11:35
  good series. So join the newsletter, the
• 11:38
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• 11:40
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• 11:45
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• 11:47
  go miss this out piece. Thank you so much for making it
• 11:49
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• 11:52
  Rockstar and I appreciate you for being here.
• 11:54
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• 11:56
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• 11:58
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• 12:01
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• 12:03
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• 12:07
  I will see you in the next video.
• 12:09
  Peace.