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Cinderella II: Dreams Come True · The After Ever After Podcast

• 0:17
  Hello everyone and welcome to the After Ever
• 0:19
  After podcast, the show where we take a look
• 0:21
  at Disney sequels to truly see what life is like
• 0:23
  after Ever After. My name is Andy and I'm joined,
• 0:26
  as always, by my co -host James. Hello, how are
• 0:29
  you? James, I'm pretty good. I'm excited to talk
• 0:33
  about Cinderella. It's been a stressful week,
• 0:35
  to be honest, and I'm excited to decompress with
• 0:38
  what could be one of Disney's greatest or maybe
• 0:42
  worst films ever. We'll have to find out. Who
• 0:44
  knows? We'll have to see when the ranking, when
• 0:47
  we've talked about it and the ranking comes about.
• 0:50
  I'd also like to say, Andy, you sound delicious
• 0:54
  today. thank you uh i've borrowed i've borrowed
• 0:58
  a real mic from someone um no way so anytime
• 1:02
  we ask anyone about feedback for the podcast
• 1:04
  uh we usually get like it was pretty good yeah
• 1:07
  like uh your audio sounds like crap though so
• 1:10
  i'm on my third microphone of the podcast and
• 1:14
  we're also on the third episode so hopefully
• 1:16
  this is the final time i think you should just
• 1:19
  get a new microphone every episode i think it
• 1:21
  would be a good running bit yeah i think i've
• 1:25
  maybe shot us in the foot a bit by doing a jump
• 1:28
  to better audio like really fast like i think
• 1:31
  i should have incrementally just slowly got better
• 1:33
  yeah because now if you ever go back it's gonna
• 1:36
  be like why is andy recording on a potato again
• 1:40
  i don't understand a lot of people say it sounded
• 1:42
  like you had a radio show and i was calling in
• 1:44
  like for the full show Oh, I love that. That's
• 1:49
  great. So you're good as well? Yeah, I am good.
• 1:55
  I have been busy doing some little bits for the
• 1:58
  pod, actually, which will be revealed in due
• 2:01
  time once I've got some more. But keep an eye
• 2:04
  out on the socials because there might be some
• 2:07
  little bits going up there. Yes. So if you are
• 2:11
  a fan of us and stuff... Just keep an eye out.
• 2:18
  You're in the right goddamn place. You like some
• 2:22
  things and some stuff. Goddamn, I've got you
• 2:25
  covered. But yeah, other than that... I went
• 2:29
  down to Bristol, which was lovely. Nice, nice.
• 2:32
  And went to Cheddar Gorge for a couple of days.
• 2:36
  That is beautiful. Very, very nice. So it's been
• 2:40
  nice and chill. Nice. Over the past few days,
• 2:43
  yeah. And now we've got to culminate it all as
• 2:46
  we finally talk about Cinderella 2, Dreams Come
• 2:50
  True. But not just yet. No, no, no, no. Because
• 2:55
  we have to go. Before we go to After Ever After,
• 3:00
  we have to go to Before Ever Before. I love that
• 3:07
  name. I'm so proud of you. I'm so proud of you
• 3:11
  for coming up with that, especially on the spot
• 3:13
  as well. It was amazing. So essentially when
• 3:18
  we go through our Disney sequels, we like to
• 3:20
  do it in order of the way the original classics
• 3:22
  came out. Sometimes we'll pass a classic that
• 3:25
  didn't get any sequels. So before we do go on
• 3:28
  to the one that did get a sequel, we'd like to
• 3:30
  take a look back and just have a little wave
• 3:33
  out the window of the train at the classics that
• 3:35
  didn't get any continuations officially and see,
• 3:37
  did they continue in any other way? So last time
• 3:40
  we spoke, we were speaking about Bambi 2. And
• 3:43
  Bambi came out in 1942 and then Cinderella came
• 3:47
  out in 1950. So we have a fair whack of movies
• 3:51
  to look at here. Little eight year gap. Yeah.
• 3:55
  My goodness. Most people you speak to, if you
• 3:58
  said like, what's your favorite period of Disney?
• 4:00
  They'd say this. They'd say the Salados, the
• 4:02
  Three Caballeros, the Make Mine, whatever this
• 4:06
  one's called. Make Mine Music. Yeah. They'd always
• 4:09
  go on about this. That's all I hear. honestly
• 4:14
  but in all seriousness uh i know like uh when
• 4:17
  i watched cinderella i watched it on blu -ray
• 4:18
  and i had an intro from diane disney miller who's
• 4:21
  like disney's niece or something and she was
• 4:23
  even saying on that like yeah cinderella was
• 4:26
  coming off a bit of a whack period bro like even
• 4:30
  a relative was just like this fuck it sucked
• 4:35
  and to be fair yeah not wrong because some of
• 4:40
  the stuff that comes after this God damn. It's
• 4:43
  kind of like Cinderella set off a little bomb
• 4:46
  for Disney. This is definitely a forgotten sort
• 4:48
  of period. There's reasons for it. Like we said,
• 4:51
  Bambi was 1942. If you know your history, there
• 4:54
  was big stuff going on in the world around that
• 4:56
  sort of time. Might not have had a lot of money
• 4:58
  to just make silly little cartoons. But let's
• 5:00
  run through them. So first after Bambi, we had
• 5:03
  Salados Amigos. I don't know what this... No,
• 5:07
  I'm genuinely... Play the clip. i haven't seen
• 5:12
  i haven't seen this what is i've i've heard of
• 5:16
  some of these i'm gonna open each of them as
• 5:19
  we go a box now yeah um so salados amigos was
• 5:23
  um i haven't seen any of these by the way either
• 5:26
  i've just done like the research but uh salados
• 5:29
  and all of these are pretty much like this they're
• 5:31
  little like segments so they've made like little
• 5:33
  shorts and they've stitched them together because
• 5:34
  um the world is at war money's tight half your
• 5:39
  anime is up in the trenches we get what we can
• 5:42
  Salados Amigos is probably most famous for an
• 5:47
  iconic image of Donald Duck where he looks absolutely
• 5:50
  furious but he has like the biggest erection
• 5:53
  you've ever seen it's one of my favorite pictures
• 5:57
  uh it comes from this i don't know what the context
• 6:00
  is i don't need to know the context i'm glad
• 6:02
  that we we will never we'll probably never know
• 6:05
  that context i'm probably never gonna see this
• 6:07
  in my life other than the fact that it stars
• 6:10
  donald duck and goofy and stuff there's not really
• 6:13
  anything that continues from this some people
• 6:15
  credit it as solidifying donald duck's like popularity
• 6:19
  i mean i doubt it if it wasn't this it would
• 6:22
  have been something else there's not really much
• 6:24
  to talk about with this to be honest it came
• 6:26
  out and it went and then following that immediately
• 6:29
  after was another donald duck kind of thing where
• 6:33
  it's uh short movies this one's called the three
• 6:36
  caballeros now this one i never actually seen
• 6:38
  i'm sure my sister had this on vhs for some reason
• 6:40
  this is uh The second of the six package movies,
• 6:45
  as they called it, where it's just like a bunch
• 6:47
  of little clips, short films strung together.
• 6:51
  And this one didn't really continue that much
• 6:53
  either. I think the Caballeros themselves have
• 6:55
  made appearances in other things, like a House
• 6:58
  of Mouse kind of thing and stuff like that. But
• 7:00
  there's not like any instance where anyone has
• 7:04
  looked at this and been like, I want to continue
• 7:06
  the stories. Like, you know what I mean? It's
• 7:08
  just the characters might show up again and that's
• 7:10
  about it. I mean, it looks like one of the characters
• 7:14
  was in Saludos Amigos. Oh, I think that's some
• 7:18
  continuity. I could be wrong. I'm going off the
• 7:22
  image on the Letterboxd banner, so I could be
• 7:26
  completely wrong. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised.
• 7:28
  I think as well, there's that thin line of like,
• 7:31
  are they reusing characters in this time period
• 7:33
  because they don't have money? Or are they kind
• 7:35
  of like setting up these legacy characters? It
• 7:38
  could fall on either side, I guess. Yeah, true.
• 7:41
  True. following that was make mine music uh it's
• 7:46
  a bit more musically focused as you can probably
• 7:47
  tell from the title but not to the degree of
• 7:50
  like a fantasia or anything like that right there's
• 7:53
  no continuation of this either uh in fact one
• 7:56
  of the critiques that many critics had of it
• 7:58
  was like it's no fantasia um so there's not really
• 8:03
  much to say about this one either put it in the
• 8:05
  put it in the bargain bin yeah let's just whiz
• 8:09
  past that one next we have fun and fancy free
• 8:11
  which is a cool name this one is only two clips
• 8:15
  and i don't know if i'm right or wrong about
• 8:18
  this but i think this is one of the first instances
• 8:21
  where disney took jiminy cricket from pinocchio
• 8:23
  and they kind of just made him like a generic
• 8:25
  disney character like oh you'd show up here and
• 8:27
  here and here and do whatever he's just one of
• 8:29
  our boys But then this one's basically Mickey
• 8:32
  and Donald and Goofy in Jack and the Beanstalk.
• 8:36
  And then there's another one about a circus bear
• 8:39
  who wants to be free. Oh, lovely. Very nice.
• 8:43
  This one didn't really get any sort of continuation
• 8:45
  again. Obviously, Mickey and Donald and Goofy
• 8:49
  are iconic characters still. Did the bear escape?
• 8:53
  Did he escape into Mickey Mouse's mouse house?
• 8:56
  I don't know, actually. I didn't check. I imagine
• 8:59
  so. It's wartime. We need to feel good. He fell
• 9:02
  off the beanstalk. I think the bear's elsewhere.
• 9:06
  It's two separate shorts and the bear's one story
• 9:08
  and the beanstalk's the other. I don't think
• 9:10
  they have a crossover moment. Maybe afterwards
• 9:14
  he went up the beanstalk and fell off. I hope
• 9:17
  not. And then following Fun and Fancy 3 is Melody
• 9:21
  Time. This one is, you guessed it, more short
• 9:27
  films tied together. Hooray! So they were trying
• 9:30
  to do another Fantasia, but seven times in a
• 9:35
  row. Yeah, and this one and Make My Music, those
• 9:38
  focus a lot on the music side of it. Trying to
• 9:42
  recapture that kind of Fantasia delight, but
• 9:45
  the other ones are kind of just like... uh not
• 9:48
  looney tunes obviously because it's disney but
• 9:49
  yeah it's just basically that thing like here's
• 9:51
  some fun little adventures that mickey goes on
• 9:53
  um yeah stitch mckeven put in the cinemas because
• 9:56
  yeah nothing else guys just just leave it until
• 10:00
  until 1999 it'll all come together well you'll
• 10:07
  be dead by then I don't care. Freeze me. That's
• 10:11
  exactly why he did it. Shove me in the freezer.
• 10:16
  Fun fact, this Melody Time actually has an entire
• 10:18
  segment on Wikipedia called Controversy, and
• 10:22
  I got really excited, but it was pretty boring
• 10:25
  because it was just about a character who smokes
• 10:26
  a cigarette. I was very excited to dive into
• 10:30
  some dirty little secrets. and then following
• 10:37
  melody time finally we have the last of these
• 10:41
  little horrible wartime movies um i mean these
• 10:45
  we're past the wartime now it's 1949 but obviously
• 10:47
  like the war didn't just end and america's like
• 10:50
  oh we're back baby there's ramifications so this
• 10:56
  one's called the adventures of ichabod and mr
• 11:00
  toad um One is The Legend of Sleepy Hollow with
• 11:04
  Ichabod Crane and then one is The Wind in the
• 11:06
  Willows with that horrible little toad man. And
• 11:10
  this is the last of these quote -unquote package
• 11:13
  films that they did until Winnie the Pooh, like
• 11:16
  many adventures of Winnie the Pooh. And I think
• 11:18
  you could give that a pass because it's not like
• 11:20
  this where it's like two completely unrelated
• 11:22
  stories. So again, there's not much to talk about
• 11:26
  with the like... continuation of this some of
• 11:30
  this stuff appears in rides um the only thing
• 11:32
  i did notice is that a lot of these characters
• 11:35
  i don't know why appear in have you ever seen
• 11:38
  mickey's christmas carol with scrooge mcduck
• 11:40
  no uh a lot of the characters from this are in
• 11:44
  that like mr toad the rats the weasels um and
• 11:49
  when i was looking at it i was like oh it must
• 11:51
  have been just after uh no mickey's christmas
• 11:54
  carol was 1983 so Whoa. They had banked these
• 12:00
  characters for like nearly 40 years and then
• 12:04
  they were like, who can we wheel out of the retirement
• 12:08
  home? Oh, I know. It's for the fans. It's like
• 12:14
  when the leader showed up in Captain America
• 12:16
  4. Just as much acclaim. It's for the fans, baby.
• 12:24
  I don't know if this is like, Like, this sounds
• 12:27
  so cynical, but I don't know if it's a thing
• 12:28
  of, like, maybe, like, Mickey's Christmas Carol
• 12:30
  was, like, pushing the budget, and they're like,
• 12:32
  we need to reuse some assets. What has nobody
• 12:35
  seen? Oh, the Adventures of Ichabod and Toad.
• 12:38
  We'll just grab some things from that. Here we
• 12:39
  go. Pop it in. Do the old Bambi rain scan again,
• 12:43
  but with an entire film. Get the Toad from Ichabod.
• 12:47
  Get the rain from Bambi. Just get whatever you
• 12:49
  can. Just shove it all together and hope it makes
• 12:52
  a film. I actually like, um... the christmas
• 12:56
  carol one like it was one of my favorites as
• 12:58
  a kid so i don't know any you know it's so weird
• 13:01
  they just there's no relation between the wind
• 13:04
  in the willows and christmas carol as far as
• 13:06
  i know it's not yeah the same right yeah very
• 13:09
  very interesting and very weird um oh the only
• 13:15
  thing i know is that it's not really a continuation
• 13:17
  but a lot of these they'd sometimes split them
• 13:19
  up um so sometimes they'd release like wind the
• 13:23
  wind in the willows bit what like is a cinema
• 13:25
  short or something like that uh okay but yeah
• 13:28
  none of them really continued and man what a
• 13:31
  miserable looking period of disney yeah genuinely
• 13:33
  it just looks so dire it's just i mean maybe
• 13:40
  we're being harsh because neither of us have
• 13:42
  watched any of these but i don't want to watch
• 13:44
  any of these no they none of them appeal to me
• 13:47
  um And I can't be bothered. It's too much. I
• 13:53
  mean, I don't know. I guess they tried. No, don't.
• 13:58
  Just don't bother. It'll be fine. I don't think
• 14:02
  you're going to lose out on not watching Melody
• 14:07
  Time. Yeah. Well, I hope this is the most depressing
• 14:12
  before we ever have to do because not even a
• 14:16
  single silly symphony, James. No silly symphony
• 14:19
  Sundays. Oh, sorry. Silly symphony Sundays. Sundays
• 14:27
  are very serious in wartime. Well, now we've
• 14:33
  got past that. Mom's drop on Sundays. Well, we've
• 14:40
  got to ask a little horrible patch of... crap
• 14:43
  i guess we can get on this cinderella uh but
• 14:48
  before we do the sequel we always like to have
• 14:51
  a quick chat about what we think of the original
• 14:54
  film so cinderella this one came out in 1950
• 14:57
  um you said on the last episode that you think
• 15:02
  you've seen it and then you messaged me a couple
• 15:03
  days ago said you definitely haven't seen it
• 15:06
  Uh, yeah. I messaged you and I said, I swear
• 15:11
  I've seen a cut of this that just removes all
• 15:14
  the mice from it because I could not remember
• 15:18
  any of the mice. So I feel like either I've seen
• 15:23
  just clips of Disney stuff where they've put
• 15:27
  the part where she gets the dress and the dance
• 15:31
  and all of that and the glass slipper stuff.
• 15:35
  And that's all I've seen. Right. Because this
• 15:38
  should not be called Cinderella because it's
• 15:41
  about the mice. Yeah. And it's mostly just a
• 15:45
  Tom and Jerry show. And then they were like,
• 15:48
  we need an overarching story here. Glass slipper,
• 15:51
  do it. Cinderella time. The weird thing is, because
• 15:55
  I was going to ask you to describe the plot.
• 15:57
  I think if I asked you to describe the plot,
• 15:59
  I don't think you'd mention the mice because...
• 16:02
  They're pretty inconsequential as far as what's
• 16:05
  actually happening. But when you watch the movie,
• 16:08
  it is weighted very much towards them. Yeah.
• 16:13
  Before watching it, I would have been like, oh,
• 16:18
  Cinderella. She's got the stepsisters and a stepmom.
• 16:22
  They're all mean to her. there's a ball, and
• 16:26
  she really wants to go, but she doesn't have
• 16:28
  a dress. She makes a dress, it gets ripped up,
• 16:31
  blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 16:33
  No time in that does a mouse appear in my description
• 16:38
  at all. A fairy godmother appears, and she turns
• 16:41
  some pumpkins into carriages and stuff. And she
• 16:44
  also decides, instead of turning a horse into
• 16:48
  a nicer horse, she just transmutates a... bunch
• 16:54
  of mice into horses would that hurt i was i was
• 16:58
  thinking the same thing uh because they're making
• 17:00
  loads of these uh like winnie the pooh blood
• 17:02
  and honey and stuff like there's got to be a
• 17:03
  body horror cinderella somewhere right well oh
• 17:08
  what have you done to me and then the same thing
• 17:11
  happens to the dog and the horse they both get
• 17:14
  turned into humans that cannot be comfortable
• 17:16
  yeah the horse is is mass shifting so much like
• 17:22
  It's losing so much of its mass. It's like Megatron
• 17:25
  turning into a handgun in the old Transformers
• 17:28
  comics. A little teeny weeny handgun. Where did
• 17:31
  the rest of him go? I think you mentioned before,
• 17:34
  like, you didn't remember any of the Mai stuff,
• 17:36
  but you remember the rest. Kind of jumping ahead
• 17:39
  a bit, but not really. I've been watching these
• 17:42
  on Blu -ray, as I've mentioned. And when I pop
• 17:44
  the Cinderella 2 Blu -ray in, it gives us a trailer
• 17:46
  for Cinderella 1, just in case. It's like, hey,
• 17:48
  asshole, you know this is a sequel, right? The
• 17:52
  trailer's basically like her at the ball, she
• 17:55
  leaves the slipper, they go to the house. The
• 17:58
  prince wants to try the slipper on everyone.
• 18:00
  It fits Cinderella. The trailer's just that.
• 18:03
  It's like the back half of the movie. It's the
• 18:05
  ending of the movie. Yeah, exactly. And that's
• 18:08
  all the marketing for it. I wouldn't be shocked
• 18:10
  if you've not seen it, but you've just seen the
• 18:12
  marketing. And because the marketing's the end
• 18:15
  of the movie, there's nowhere in your head you're
• 18:16
  like... I've just seen the trailer. No way. I
• 18:19
  couldn't have seen that. It's the end of the
• 18:20
  movie. But no, they just show you the ending.
• 18:23
  Yeah, that's wild. Because when it started and
• 18:27
  the birds were chirping and they were coming
• 18:29
  in and they were helping Cinderella, that's Snow
• 18:32
  White's thing, isn't it? I was like, there's
• 18:34
  animals helping out in this film as well. What's
• 18:37
  going on? I think Snow White's friends to all
• 18:39
  the animals and Cinderella's got these specific
• 18:41
  mates. Right, okay. That makes more sense. But
• 18:44
  it also was not what I was expecting when that
• 18:48
  happened. I was like, hang on a second. So speaking
• 18:50
  of, just while we're on the mics, I did actually
• 18:53
  look it up because I was wondering, like, Cinderella's
• 18:55
  barely in this for, like, the first 40 minutes.
• 18:58
  Yeah. Cinderella is actually the Disney princess
• 19:01
  with the third least amount of screen time. So
• 19:04
  she has 26 minutes and 4 seconds. I didn't get
• 19:08
  the time for these other two. In the first one?
• 19:12
  In the first one, yeah. Why is this called Cinderella?
• 19:17
  It's like 70 minutes long. It's not a Cinderella
• 19:19
  film. That is absolutely insane. This is breaking
• 19:25
  my brain. I don't understand. Why? Have you got
• 19:28
  any guesses on the two Disney princesses she
• 19:31
  could have beaten in screen time? You've gotten
• 19:36
  every Disney princess right now, haven't you?
• 19:40
  yeah um i want to say sleeping beauty yes asleep
• 19:44
  yes you got it let's go she managed to beat the
• 19:50
  one that's not conscious for the entire movie
• 19:52
  and then oh i can give you a hint for the other
• 19:54
  one is it more modern it's more it's more modern
• 19:59
  but the movie's not named after the princess
• 20:01
  so princess aurora who is sleeping beauty she's
• 20:05
  the bottom and then there's this next one Question
• 20:08
  mark, question mark. And then there's Cinderella.
• 20:11
  Oh, no. I was going to say Thingy from Frozen.
• 20:17
  Nah, she's in it like a lot. Yeah, because it
• 20:20
  kind of goes to the other one. And then I was
• 20:22
  like, oh, well, never mind. She has a pet that
• 20:26
  belongs to the feline family. Who has a cat?
• 20:30
  I never said cat. Jasmine. Yeah. Oh. shit no
• 20:37
  way yeah so she beats jasmine but in all fairness
• 20:40
  jasmine's not the main character of aladdin um
• 20:43
  that belongs to that other guy i can't remember
• 20:46
  his name no but um genie yeah robin williams
• 20:50
  yeah uh but yeah that's that means that like
• 20:55
  you've got excuses for your two and then this
• 20:57
  is just like we want to look at the mice bro
• 20:59
  yeah it's there's oh god It's so weird. I don't
• 21:04
  understand. This is a mouse film. But other than
• 21:09
  that, what did you think about it? Yeah, it's
• 21:11
  an interesting one. I think it not being about
• 21:16
  Cinderella really kind of threw me off. And I
• 21:20
  was a bit confused and just like, what's going
• 21:23
  on? Also, I forgot it was a musical or it had
• 21:26
  musical numbers, which was kind of a nice surprise.
• 21:31
  The songs are great. Oh, yeah. Shout out to all
• 21:36
  of the mice making the dress. Lovely. Really,
• 21:40
  really, really nice scene. I think, yeah, animation
• 21:43
  was really good. One thing that I didn't like,
• 21:47
  and I'm curious on your thoughts, I really did
• 21:50
  not like the kind of sped up voices for the mice.
• 21:56
  i thought it found sounded really stupid at first
• 22:00
  and then they were all like what do they say
• 22:02
  or whatever i mean it worked enough for me if
• 22:07
  they were like supporting characters but when
• 22:10
  it's so much when when you're with them for the
• 22:13
  entire time and they're just like It's like,
• 22:16
  come on, chill. Let's just talk normal for a
• 22:20
  bit. I want to send you a video that I thought
• 22:22
  would be funny to do of me watching the mice
• 22:25
  singing stone faces if I was watching like Schindler's
• 22:28
  List or something. And I lost my mind during
• 22:31
  that. I broke down and I was in tears and I thought
• 22:33
  I was going to pass out laughing because it is
• 22:35
  just so weird. Just this five minute song of
• 22:39
  the sped up voices and super high pitch of these
• 22:42
  mice. Yeah. It was so strange. It's another one
• 22:47
  of those things where score is quite a lot of
• 22:51
  the sound effects. However, we are starting to
• 22:54
  see more sound effects come in. So I'm wondering
• 22:56
  which classic it's going to be that just kind
• 22:59
  of abandons that. And then we've got full sound
• 23:02
  effects with score kind of. I think it'll be
• 23:05
  a while. Yeah, with score. what's the word, like
• 23:08
  emphasizing some of those sound effects as well.
• 23:11
  The stepsisters in them, stepmom are horrible,
• 23:15
  aren't they? Yeah. Cinderella! i thought she
• 23:19
  felt like it's so it's weird to say because like
• 23:22
  you think of disney villains you've got like
• 23:23
  evil sorcerers and people taking over the world
• 23:26
  and people who kill their own brothers and all
• 23:27
  this stuff but like this feels like one of the
• 23:29
  nastiest disney villains because she's just so
• 23:32
  real nothing she does is over the top or yeah
• 23:36
  even animated weird she's just cold and calculating
• 23:39
  and horrible horrible i i genuinely wrote this
• 23:44
  is for the sequel, but stepmother should be in
• 23:47
  that Disney villains game. Like 100%. Oh yeah.
• 23:51
  Take out that other guy. Yeah. And she would
• 23:55
  just be. she'd just stand there while all the
• 23:58
  other villains are like doing stuff and she'd
• 24:00
  just be silently judging all of them yeah you
• 24:04
  know some of the animation on her like just stand
• 24:06
  it's like sternly staring with like the shadows
• 24:09
  on her and stuff it's like oh god i hate unreal
• 24:11
  it gives like phil really like film noir kind
• 24:16
  of um yeah like not necessarily but like some
• 24:19
  of those reaction shots of her with the shadows
• 24:23
  oh It's really good. Really good. She is for
• 24:28
  someone that doesn't do that much. Like she does
• 24:31
  a lot of evil, but it's very low stakes evil
• 24:34
  kind of thing. Yeah. And she's played by Eleanor
• 24:37
  Audley, who went on to play Maleficent for Sleeping
• 24:39
  Beauty. So she did actually end up playing like
• 24:41
  a super big evil. That's cool. Yeah. It was one
• 24:45
  point halfway down the page. I just put, God,
• 24:47
  this is slow. So I don't know what was happening
• 24:51
  there, but I was bored. Straight after that.
• 24:54
  oh, this dressmaking is lovely, and then I just
• 24:56
  wrote in big letters when Gus says, happy birthday!
• 25:04
  Because I laughed a lot. I love that big doofus.
• 25:09
  He's great. Yeah, at first I was like, oh, this
• 25:13
  guy's going to be annoying, and then they called
• 25:16
  him Octavius, and I was like, Otto! Dad's self
• 25:21
  -sustaining now! the power of the dress on the
• 25:27
  palm of my hand i thought cinderella cinderella
• 25:32
  yourself was such a lovely character and i think
• 25:35
  like because i know that walt disney apparently
• 25:37
  he did actually really like cinderella um this
• 25:39
  is a bit of a side note but they did do cinderella's
• 25:41
  short in 1922 i've not actually watched that
• 25:43
  yet but oh wow they were going to come back to
• 25:46
  cinderella as a silly symphony in 1933 no way
• 25:50
  and it slowly just evolved into this because
• 25:53
  they were like oh we can't really do this justice
• 25:55
  in a shot and i guess you could argue they could
• 25:58
  take the mice out and they can do this justice
• 25:59
  as a shot yeah but have this as like a part in
• 26:04
  fantasia 3000 but cinderella feels like such
• 26:09
  a good character for that kind of time period
• 26:11
  of the 1950s she's a character that goes through
• 26:13
  hardship every day but she faces it like really
• 26:15
  happy and optimistic and like you just gotta
• 26:18
  like plug in and dream and hope and i guess that
• 26:22
  was probably like good for kids at that time
• 26:23
  yeah she's on that grind set yeah she is yeah
• 26:27
  but but all of that niceness she exudes is like
• 26:31
  it really makes that scene where the stepsisters
• 26:33
  rip her dress up like so heartbreak and like
• 26:36
  she finally just breaks down and cries like like
• 26:39
  oh man you broke her she was so nice and happy
• 26:43
  i'll tell you what the first half of this film
• 26:46
  is i think that's where i was like this is slow
• 26:48
  yeah and then like you got the dressmaker scene
• 26:51
  amazing love it the rest of it God damn, it's
• 26:55
  a good film. It's a really good back end of it.
• 26:58
  I think the start just kind of... It's just a
• 27:01
  lot of mice and annoyingness. And as soon as
• 27:04
  it gets back into the Cinderella story, I really
• 27:07
  liked the end part of it. Oh, yeah. But enough
• 27:11
  of James Oglen over Cinderella's back end. Speaking
• 27:14
  of back ends, actually. The asses of the stepsisters,
• 27:19
  Jesus Christ! Oh, I thought you were going to
• 27:21
  mention the scene where... They get all the beads
• 27:24
  and they start putting them on Gus's tail. But
• 27:28
  it very quickly starts looking like he's just
• 27:30
  got anal beads coming out of his ass. Oh my god.
• 27:34
  I didn't like that. I feel like I looked away
• 27:38
  from the screen for like two seconds and missed
• 27:40
  that. Otherwise I would have written that down.
• 27:43
  The only thing I want to touch on before we move
• 27:45
  on quickly is just that I hate that cat. It's
• 27:47
  literally called Lucifer and I want to watch
• 27:48
  it drown in cement. It was like the worst cat.
• 27:52
  It was like the most evil cat. He's got a proper
• 27:55
  like Cheshire Cat smile as well. Oh, he's horrible.
• 27:58
  They definitely like for Alice in Wonderland
• 28:00
  must have taken inspiration from... Wait, which
• 28:03
  came out first? It was this, wasn't it? Alice
• 28:05
  in Wonderland's literally the next one. Oh, interesting.
• 28:09
  So yeah, they must have had the cells of Lucifer
• 28:12
  and just shoved them on the Cheshire Cat kind
• 28:14
  of thing. Because they look really similar. Spoilers
• 28:18
  for the end of the film, it looks like Lucifer
• 28:20
  died. Like he falls out a window and they just
• 28:23
  do like a really long like... As he falls out
• 28:28
  the window. However... He lives. uh just one
• 28:39
  quick note before we move on because i thought
• 28:40
  this was like i don't know if it is sad or not
• 28:42
  i don't know anything about her life cinderella's
• 28:44
  voiced by eileen woods and she had no other leading
• 28:48
  roles other than this she was an extra in one
• 28:50
  film and two tv shows one of which was uncredited
• 28:54
  she had her own radio show she had one album
• 28:57
  in 57 she did like a disney album in 49 when
• 29:00
  she played snow white but really nothing going
• 29:03
  on there i say it's sad maybe she'd you know
• 29:06
  maybe she liked that maybe she didn't want this
• 29:08
  big life but i thought she was brilliant in this
• 29:11
  and her singing voice is fantastic on that dream
• 29:13
  is a yeah wish your heart makes and uh yeah i
• 29:16
  was shocked she didn't get like a big career
• 29:18
  i mean we say it's a shame but that might have
• 29:22
  been what she wanted but yeah it's exactly i
• 29:25
  hope it's a shame for it's a shame to kind of
• 29:28
  not waste her talent By her not doing it. If
• 29:33
  she did want to continue, that's a shame. Exactly.
• 29:34
  But if she didn't want to continue, she just
• 29:37
  robbed us of all that talent because she was
• 29:39
  excellent. She was really, really good. And she
• 29:42
  brought a lot of love and life to Cinderella.
• 29:46
  And she's lovely in the first film. She's absolutely
• 29:49
  great. Just a lovely character. through and through,
• 29:54
  as you were saying before. Yeah. I don't know
• 29:56
  if there's much more to say about the first one.
• 29:58
  Good film. It's pretty good. Do you reckon it's
• 30:02
  time for a dream to come true? I think it's time
• 30:05
  to make a book. Okay, so Cinderella 2. Anyone
• 30:10
  who hasn't seen the film is going to be so confused
• 30:13
  by that. Let's make a book. What are you talking
• 30:16
  about? Watch the film. Oh, we will get into it.
• 30:20
  Oh, firstly, just really quickly on the first
• 30:24
  one. How did they do? I was wondering if you'd
• 30:27
  had a look at any trivia or behind the scenes.
• 30:31
  How did they do the book opening shot? Because
• 30:33
  it looks like it's 3D animated. With the book
• 30:36
  openings, they usually... did those live action
• 30:39
  i don't know about this one specifically didn't
• 30:41
  look live action it looked like slightly 3d animated
• 30:44
  so i don't know if they did some weird cell shading
• 30:47
  or something it was cool i really liked it and
• 30:50
  so much so i wrote it down because i was like
• 30:53
  that is crazy how much that looks like not even
• 30:57
  early 3d animation it looked like newer 3d animation
• 31:00
  i was like what did they do we'll come back i
• 31:04
  don't know don't worry about it we'll come back
• 31:06
  to it let's go on to the second one because uh
• 31:08
  i'm distracting us yeah actually i'm gonna tell
• 31:12
  you because i did look up trivia there just trying
• 31:13
  to see if i could quickly find it couldn't but
• 31:16
  um turns out eileen woods suffered from alzheimer's
• 31:19
  in the later years of her life and she couldn't
• 31:21
  even remember that she played cinderella oh maybe
• 31:24
  that's why she didn't that might be it don't
• 31:26
  make me cry that's really sad Yeah, but apparently
• 31:30
  she found she really liked the song A Dream Is
• 31:32
  A Wish Your Heart Would Make, despite not knowing
• 31:35
  that it was her. Oh, God. Anyway. Onto something
• 31:40
  else. Let's cheer ourselves up by looking at
• 31:44
  a film that's probably going to be really good.
• 31:47
  Cinderella 2, A Dream Come True. I'm so excited.
• 31:51
  Yay. So let's get some quick facts on this one.
• 31:55
  Cinderella 2 came out in 2002. Yep. So that's
• 31:58
  52 years after the first one. Not quite the Bambi
• 32:02
  gap, but pretty, like half a decade, half a century
• 32:05
  even. Still a very, very long gap. Have you got
• 32:10
  the director in front of you? Because I've got
• 32:11
  some stuff written down. I do. John Kafka. He
• 32:16
  didn't work on anything else. I was going to
• 32:18
  say, I could not find if he had done anything
• 32:22
  else. So I think... John Lasseter's guillotine
• 32:26
  actually killed him. So John Kafka directed this.
• 32:31
  He works a lot in other animated stuff in just
• 32:33
  like a smaller capacity. He's done some directing
• 32:36
  for small TV shows that we probably haven't heard
• 32:39
  of. I mean, I hadn't heard of them and I can't
• 32:41
  imagine you would have. All right. I didn't even
• 32:43
  write them down. Came out February 2002, The
• 32:47
  Year of Our Lord and Savior, Spider -Man by Sam
• 32:49
  Raimi. This somehow... got a cinema release in
• 32:53
  eight countries, including the one we're in right
• 32:56
  now. I was looking that up and I could not find
• 32:58
  that, so I don't know where you found that, but
• 33:00
  that's fascinating. It is. What's even more fascinating
• 33:04
  is I went on Box Office Mojo because I was like,
• 33:07
  what did it go up against? Box Office Mojo tracks
• 33:10
  the box office so deeply that you can go to the
• 33:13
  weekends of like the early 2000s and see. Wow.
• 33:17
  And I was going through the weeks of 2002 and
• 33:20
  there was data for every single week for the
• 33:22
  UK. And then I got to this week and it was gone.
• 33:26
  It's from the records. That is unreal. So, yeah.
• 33:33
  Wow. God knows what happens. Who knows? We have
• 33:36
  no idea. We would love to tell you, but we don't
• 33:39
  know. Wikipedia thinks it made $120 million,
• 33:43
  but there's no source. So do you know that the
• 33:45
  estimated budget as well was $5 million? So they
• 33:51
  made bank if that $120 million. But to be fair,
• 33:56
  Bambi 2 made a... shitload and sold however many
• 34:00
  i would not be surprised audience yeah and that
• 34:04
  i just remember there's not really any big stars
• 34:07
  in this there's no patrick stewart dear to pay
• 34:08
  for there isn't however jennifer hale as cinderella
• 34:12
  who yeah loads of people like might not know
• 34:17
  the name but you've definitely heard her in so
• 34:21
  much stuff she's in everything sod's law didn't
• 34:25
  write any of it down but i know she's in bioshock
• 34:27
  infinite female commander shepherd in mass effect
• 34:30
  she's naomi hunter in metal gear solid as well
• 34:33
  she is she's also in metal gear solid 2 as a
• 34:36
  different character she's all over the place
• 34:39
  she's jean gray in x -men 97 like the new ones
• 34:43
  not the original release yeah this is my favorite
• 34:46
  one though she was black cat in the 90s spider
• 34:49
  -man cartoon hell yeah you know who played the
• 34:51
  prince Goddamn fucking Spider -Man. It's Christopher
• 34:54
  Daniel Barnes. I lost my mind. I have normal
• 34:57
  notes on my page. Like, logo transition was cool.
• 35:02
  There's another cat now. And then the rest of
• 35:04
  the page just has, in capital letters, Spider
• 35:07
  -Man, Spider -Man, radioactive Spider -Man. Because
• 35:11
  I heard his voice. I got so excited. I love that
• 35:15
  boy. Oh, that is so great. Oh, I'm so happy for
• 35:23
  you. And then he's barely in it. Yeah. The first
• 35:27
  thing that happens is he gets a few lines and
• 35:32
  then he fucks off. yeah firstly let's go over
• 35:35
  the story yeah good luck i thought this was going
• 35:38
  to be a proper sequel yeah this is not a proper
• 35:43
  sequel no which means we're three episodes into
• 35:45
  this podcast and we've never had an actual sequel
• 35:47
  where one story follows another story i had been
• 35:53
  making my notes and i'm sorry that i keep saying
• 35:55
  this is what i wrote down making my notes downtown
• 36:02
  I just wrote, huh? Question mark. Short stories.
• 36:07
  Was this a TV show? So this was created by Walt
• 36:13
  Disney Television Animation. Now, it's not rare
• 36:17
  for them to do some of the straight to DVD stuff
• 36:21
  or the straight to VHS stuff. However, yes, this
• 36:25
  used to be. Part of a TV show. So a lot of people
• 36:29
  think that this was a TV show that just failed
• 36:32
  called Cinderella Stories, which was going to
• 36:35
  be episodes of, you know, Cinderella based adventures,
• 36:39
  which is exactly what this feels like, what this
• 36:42
  film is. There's also a complete storyboard for
• 36:47
  what? I don't know if it was the first ever episode
• 36:51
  or if it was going to be a future one. But yeah,
• 36:54
  really interesting. that we've essentially got
• 36:58
  the dregs of a cancelled tv show shoved together
• 37:02
  into this film how long did it take you to find
• 37:06
  that did it take you a while it felt to me like
• 37:08
  it had been buried yeah so i like i was looking
• 37:12
  on wikipedia didn't have anything on wikipedia
• 37:14
  and then i started going like digging a little
• 37:17
  deeper because i was like why does it feel like
• 37:19
  a tv show and just kept looking looking through
• 37:22
  and then i think it was just on like Can't remember
• 37:25
  where I found it. But yeah, then it came up and
• 37:28
  it said that... But it's not like an official
• 37:30
  one. Yeah, it was. It was the fandom Disney wiki.
• 37:33
  Yeah. And it came up and it had all of the stuff
• 37:36
  for Cinderella stories on there, including those
• 37:40
  extra storyboards and stuff like that. It's crazy.
• 37:44
  Yeah, because when I first read it, it didn't
• 37:45
  have a source. So I was like, it sounds like
• 37:47
  they're just maybe like, you know, spitballing.
• 37:49
  But then you see all the storyboards like, no,
• 37:51
  this exists. i guess disney just buried it yeah
• 37:55
  it's very strange they buried the box office
• 37:58
  they buried the tv show they're like no one must
• 38:01
  know what we created here yeah i'm not surprised
• 38:04
  yeah yeah this was a slog to get through do you
• 38:08
  know what in the back end of it i was laughing
• 38:10
  quite a lot but tragic yeah it's not great is
• 38:14
  it uh so we should probably just hit this like
• 38:18
  we did fantasia and just go through the show
• 38:19
  i reckon i was gonna say yeah let's let's do
• 38:23
  that well how is that what's the setup what's
• 38:25
  the glue that keeps all these stories together
• 38:27
  the glue the glue that's very apt that you said
• 38:32
  that because there's a lot of glue used to make
• 38:34
  this book to trap the mice in the walls this
• 38:40
  starts off straight away i've written mice voices
• 38:43
  are insanely close to the og because they literally
• 38:46
  sound the same it's crazy i don't agree i think
• 38:51
  this sounds the same but i think jack sounds
• 38:54
  horrible like he sounds i can't i can't do an
• 38:58
  impression of a mouse but in the first one he
• 39:00
  sounds a bit more mousey he sounds like but in
• 39:02
  this one he just sounds like an annoying human
• 39:04
  like Where is Cinderella gone? I can't do an
• 39:07
  impression of this guy because he's just out
• 39:10
  of my element. What I feel like it is, is it's
• 39:14
  going to be a TV show. One of these mice you've
• 39:16
  got to be able to hear and actually understand.
• 39:18
  This one. And he's going to be the main character.
• 39:20
  Yeah. Because the guy's a talented voice actor.
• 39:24
  But he sounded horrible to me. And this one particular
• 39:28
  character. Anyway, so the story is... They've
• 39:33
  all moved into the castle. Cinderella's brought
• 39:36
  everyone over. So she brought all the mice. She's
• 39:39
  brought all the birds. Imagine being the king.
• 39:44
  You'd be furious. Just like rocking up with like
• 39:48
  17 animal carriers. Do you mind if I bring my
• 39:53
  pets? Yeah, no, that's fine. Why is a goddamn
• 39:55
  rat in my teacup, Cinderella? You fuck. this
• 40:01
  is a health and safety hazard i'm an old man
• 40:04
  oh dear so cinderella's moved everyone into the
• 40:09
  um into the house including the mice and the
• 40:12
  fairy godmother as well yeah that's not her authority
• 40:16
  like i didn't get that i'm pretty sure that she
• 40:19
  just appears when she wants to um but for some
• 40:24
  reason she's moved in because cinderella's moved
• 40:26
  in so yeah i don't know what's going on there
• 40:28
  does she own her well i think my game theory
• 40:30
  is because in the first movie she kind of appears
• 40:33
  as if like The same way a normal fairy godmother,
• 40:36
  you know, like Cinderella's desperate. She's
• 40:37
  broken down. She appears. She makes a wish come
• 40:39
  true. They're not mates. They've never met. They're
• 40:42
  not going to hang out after. But I feel like
• 40:44
  this was like the Aladdin show worked and that
• 40:47
  had the genie. She'll be our genie. And she's
• 40:49
  also iconic. So I guess they just couldn't think
• 40:51
  of a reason and they just shove her in. But it
• 40:54
  doesn't feel, it feels weird that it's like in
• 40:55
  her off hours when little girls aren't having
• 40:58
  crises. She's just hanging out with these mice.
• 41:01
  The fairy godmother is like, oh what do you want
• 41:05
  to do mice and they're like tell us a story about
• 41:08
  cinderella please well she's like ah sorry lads
• 41:11
  we haven't got one we haven't got another one
• 41:14
  we've finished it yeah gus was coming over and
• 41:16
  they literally just finished the book about cinderella
• 41:18
  and he says because i wrote this line down it's
• 41:21
  my favorite line he goes though what if we just
• 41:23
  made another book which is like probably what
• 41:26
  if we just made another film exactly It's just
• 41:29
  a quote from the executive boardroom. Ah, it's
• 41:33
  a shame Cinderella's not making more money, boys.
• 41:35
  Duh, what if we just made another movie? Excellent.
• 41:41
  You're hired and you've got a promotion. So yeah,
• 41:45
  they tell some little stories about... About
• 41:48
  Cinderella and half of them aren't really about
• 41:51
  Cinderella. Yeah. Well, I mean, the first one
• 41:55
  is... is what's this one called james aim to
• 41:59
  please so aim to please is like kind of what
• 42:03
  you'd think a sequel to cinderella 2 would be
• 42:05
  right it's like cinderella's moved into the castle
• 42:07
  and she as a person who's lived as a basic she's
• 42:12
  basically been like a slave maid for the stepmother
• 42:15
  she has to become a customer of royalty and but
• 42:18
  there's nothing there's nothing interesting about
• 42:21
  it the prince instantly um and my thought is
• 42:24
  if i was If someone came to me and said, right,
• 42:27
  a Cinderella sequel, and I watched the first
• 42:29
  one, I was making notes like, where do we go
• 42:31
  with this? The prince is not a character in the
• 42:33
  first one. He's a goalie. He's just a visual.
• 42:36
  Oh, it's a pretty prince. It's the escape. He's
• 42:40
  literally called Prince Charming. yeah that's
• 42:42
  fine for the eighth time but if you have to expand
• 42:45
  upon it i would probably choose him and be like
• 42:48
  let's flesh him and make him a character and
• 42:49
  they don't they go prince is gone now cinderella's
• 42:53
  hanging out in the castle and everyone wants
• 42:55
  her to be posh but she's not and but what if
• 42:58
  what what if everyone does it her way and that's
• 43:00
  it And that's the end. Yeah. That's the movie.
• 43:04
  That's where I wrote, huh? Because I was like,
• 43:07
  literally just before the conflict disappears
• 43:10
  because suddenly the sort of stepmother equivalent,
• 43:15
  or what I thought was going to be the stepmother
• 43:17
  equivalent for the entire film. Prudence. Just
• 43:20
  goes, yeah, just goes, oh. Maybe we should have
• 43:25
  done it Cinderella's way. So essentially what
• 43:28
  happens in this one is Cinderella moves in. And
• 43:33
  like Andy said, everyone wants her to behave
• 43:37
  like royalty kind of thing and be prim and proper.
• 43:41
  She can't do anything. She just has to sort of
• 43:44
  be there, make the correct decisions. Which she
• 43:50
  keeps getting wrong. And everyone's like, oh,
• 43:53
  why would you choose cream over apricot or whatever
• 43:57
  it is? Yeah. Like for napkins and stuff like
• 44:00
  that. And then Cinderella gets sad and she wants
• 44:05
  to reject her royalty and embrace being a serf.
• 44:09
  A what? A serf. Like a peasant. All right. Okay.
• 44:13
  That's a good word. I like it a lot. There's
• 44:16
  a part that I just wrote down. a princess does
• 44:21
  not woohoo which it wasn't it wasn't necessarily
• 44:27
  that but it was a princess does not da da da
• 44:30
  da da yeah like it's jasmine right like from
• 44:34
  elad yes we've seen this exactly there's also
• 44:39
  a weird animation glitch where they animated
• 44:43
  it really weirdly where you know when she's got
• 44:46
  the the big metal so she's getting dressed up
• 44:49
  to go to the down to practice the banquet or
• 44:53
  something like that um and they put some shoes
• 44:57
  in front of her and she ends up putting her right
• 45:00
  leg into the left foot and the left leg into
• 45:03
  the right foot but then her legs are normal it's
• 45:06
  really weird and i just noticed it for a split
• 45:08
  second and i was like i sure hope someone got
• 45:10
  fired for that blunder so uh she gets really
• 45:16
  sad and then she's like no way i'm gonna do things
• 45:20
  my way as angry old lady is is off doing other
• 45:24
  things she kind of turns everything around she
• 45:27
  does it her way she makes chocolate pudding blah
• 45:29
  blah blah blah blah uh everyone loves her uh
• 45:32
  cinderella is princess diana oh you could just
• 45:37
  watch spencer She comes in and she's a lady from
• 45:46
  a... She's a scullery maid from a poorer background
• 45:49
  and she gets into royalty and everyone loves
• 45:53
  her. She is Diana. Thank God this was set before
• 45:56
  the automobile was invented. I... Oh, man. It's...
• 46:02
  There's nothing. There's nothing to it. It does
• 46:06
  the day and then... All the conflict disappears
• 46:10
  because the grumpy old lady gets put into the
• 46:14
  arms of the grand duke. Yeah, it's the guy from
• 46:18
  the first one who's the one who puts the slipper
• 46:21
  on people's feet. They have a little waltz and
• 46:25
  then she's like, oh my god, maybe Cinderella
• 46:28
  knows what she's doing after all. And then it
• 46:31
  ends. And I was like, what? What? there's a line
• 46:37
  in this bit as well where she says um i am who
• 46:39
  i am and the prince loves me for who i am it's
• 46:41
  like does he We've never seen you interact. It
• 46:45
  would be nice to find out. I've seen you kiss
• 46:48
  at the end of the film and then kiss at the end
• 46:51
  of this party and that's it. All the interaction
• 46:54
  that you've had. It's so generic and so nothing
• 46:57
  and you've seen this so many times. It's the
• 47:00
  same as the first one. It's the same thing but
• 47:03
  from a different point of view. It's getting
• 47:06
  used to being rich and it's the same thing. You've
• 47:09
  got the... the stepmother again you've got the
• 47:13
  two angry stepsisters apart from one of them's
• 47:15
  not angry the other one is um and then they kind
• 47:18
  of get turned around and it's like there's it's
• 47:21
  the same thing yeah it very much felt like an
• 47:24
  episode of a cinderella tv show that got cancelled
• 47:26
  it really did and it sucked it it's just whatever
• 47:32
  well Should we move to the next segment? I really
• 47:35
  don't know what else to say about this. No, it's
• 47:38
  just... It's not very good. What's this next
• 47:41
  one called? Tall Tale. Just before... Just before
• 47:43
  we go on to Tall Tale, as they're making the
• 47:46
  book, so the making of the book is like the intercutting
• 47:51
  parts of the story. So that's where the fairy
• 47:53
  godmother and the mice are kind of filling this
• 47:56
  book with stories about Cinderella. And they
• 47:59
  do a scissors recreation. So you know where they're
• 48:03
  chopping the fabric in the first one and Gus
• 48:07
  is on the scissors. It's animated beautifully.
• 48:11
  They do a recreation. It looks fucking dog shit.
• 48:16
  It looks so bad compared to the original. And
• 48:20
  at that point, if you're going to do a reference
• 48:22
  like that, maybe just go and get the original
• 48:25
  and just like draw over it or something. Put
• 48:28
  the Bambi Reign over the top. Make him the Cheshire
• 48:33
  Cat. that's probably a good point to mention
• 48:37
  as well that like in bam we're going to mention
• 48:39
  this a lot obviously because he's a director
• 48:40
  dvd and the first ones are beautifully hand -drawn
• 48:42
  and painted and then this is digital art and
• 48:45
  stuff but we mentioned in bambi too we were both
• 48:47
  quite impressed that they had that limitation
• 48:49
  but they still put loads of effort into the styling
• 48:51
  and the colors and stuff and this one doesn't
• 48:53
  have that but then again this isn't a film this
• 48:56
  is three episodes of a tv show so it is yeah
• 48:58
  um the the one thing that they do keep is the
• 49:02
  style they do like me and my partner were talking
• 49:06
  about this when we were watching it and yeah
• 49:08
  they do keep quite well to the style of cinderella
• 49:12
  there's a couple of things that have changed
• 49:13
  and one of the things that i don't know if this
• 49:16
  is from and this is just a weird thing that i
• 49:18
  um noticed cinderella does unless she's in profile
• 49:23
  she doesn't have a nose oh yeah what i mean yeah
• 49:26
  that's like an old i think that's a carryover
• 49:28
  from the old lot style but then there's so many
• 49:30
  other people in this film who have nose and it's
• 49:34
  just it's such a weird like thing to keep and
• 49:37
  i get i get it if you you know gave cinderella
• 49:41
  a big old schnoz or or whatever it would it wouldn't
• 49:45
  look like cinderella but it's it's just an interesting
• 49:47
  like hangover I just want to out you here as
• 49:50
  well, because you mentioned you watched this
• 49:51
  with your partner. I feel like one of the things
• 49:54
  that if Cinderella was in the modern day, you
• 49:56
  might have seen the evil stepmother and the evil
• 49:58
  stepsisters watch Cinderella 1 by themselves
• 50:01
  and then force Cinderella to watch Cinderella
• 50:03
  2, which is not fun. Which is what you did to
• 50:06
  your partner. I can't imagine a fate that I want
• 50:08
  less than that, watching this piece of shit with
• 50:11
  no context. I was like, you've seen the first
• 50:15
  one, haven't you? And she was like, yeah. And
• 50:17
  I was like, you remember it, don't you? And she
• 50:19
  was like, no. Are you sure? Because there are
• 50:21
  a lot of mice. Well, I started talking about
• 50:24
  this and she was like, yeah, of course there
• 50:26
  are. And I was like, what do you mean? Maybe
• 50:29
  it's just us. I mean, I've actually rewatched
• 50:32
  this recently, but I watched it a couple of years
• 50:36
  ago when it came out in 4K. But when I watched
• 50:38
  it then, I was like, the fuck is this mice shit?
• 50:42
  Yeah. I just had no idea there were that many
• 50:45
  mice. And I feel like that's just going to be
• 50:47
  a thing that we keep circling back to. There's
• 50:50
  so many mice. Especially now. Because the next
• 50:52
  section is called Tall Tale. Tall Tale. This
• 50:57
  is an excellent story about Jacques, the little
• 51:01
  mouse that wears a red goblin hat. He wants to
• 51:03
  help Cinderella out. But he can't because he's
• 51:06
  a little mouse. So he's like, God damn it. I
• 51:08
  wish I was a goddamn human. And the fairy godmother
• 51:11
  turns and she's like, Oh, I do that shit. That's
• 51:13
  my entire thing. You'd be a human right now if
• 51:16
  you want to be. He's like, yeah, all right. So
• 51:18
  he turns into a human. And then he helps Cinderella,
• 51:22
  quote unquote, maybe. He just kind of hangs around
• 51:25
  and acts like a buffoon. He's not trying to trick
• 51:31
  her. He was going to go tell Cinderella like,
• 51:33
  Oh. I'm a human now, by the way, if you need
• 51:35
  any shit done. But then he gets distracted and
• 51:38
  then just never tells her and just starts lying
• 51:41
  to her for no reason, saying he's a different
• 51:42
  guy. Well, so the reason for that is because
• 51:46
  he gets a bucket dumped on his head and then
• 51:48
  that Grand Duke kind of is like, oh, what's your
• 51:51
  name? And he's like, huh? And he's like, huh?
• 51:53
  Oh, is that Belgian? Kind of thing. Everyone
• 51:55
  keeps misinterpreting and not letting him finish
• 51:59
  what he's saying. Yeah, but they act like there's
• 52:01
  no way out of that now. Like, no, you could just
• 52:04
  be like, oh no, by the way, that's not my goddamn
• 52:05
  name. Of course it's not, you fucking idiot.
• 52:07
  My name is Jacques. I'm a mouse. I'm a mouse
• 52:10
  that's now a man. Again, did it hurt turning
• 52:14
  into a man? Probably. But he just doesn't. He's
• 52:18
  just like, oh, I guess they... They think that's
• 52:21
  my name now, so I guess I just have to lie to
• 52:22
  my best mate for the entire episode. Very strange.
• 52:27
  Yeah, very easily fixable as well. The amount
• 52:31
  of time that Cinderella spends just plodding
• 52:34
  around doing nothing is crazy. Just go up to
• 52:39
  her and be like, hey, Cinderella, it's me, Jacques.
• 52:43
  I'm a guy now. So if you need any things or whatever...
• 52:48
  Just let me know and I'll help you out. Because
• 52:50
  that's all he wants to do. He just wants to help
• 52:51
  her out. I don't know why anyone would want this.
• 52:54
  This was such a waste of time. Like, I mentioned
• 52:57
  the first one was nothing. But this was such
• 52:59
  a dog shit story. It was so boring. It's just,
• 53:02
  it doesn't have any, like, I guess the moral
• 53:04
  is, like, be happy you're a mouse. Because by
• 53:07
  the end of it, he's like, oh, my mouse mates
• 53:08
  are scared of me now because I'm a big, freaky
• 53:10
  human. And for some reason, I won't tell them
• 53:12
  who I am. Like, all right, I'll just turn you
• 53:14
  back into a mouse then, bro. um that's the it's
• 53:16
  jesus it's really weird the cat witnesses a mouse
• 53:21
  turn into a fully grown man like she sees oh
• 53:24
  this isn't um yeah this isn't lucifer the evil
• 53:27
  cat from the first no sorry there's there's a
• 53:30
  goddamn new cat in town and it's a white cat
• 53:33
  it's the same cat pretty much but it's exactly
• 53:37
  the same cat um i yeah they whitewashed uh lucifer
• 53:42
  by making him a white female cat it's just it's
• 53:48
  lucifer too and she's the exact same uh but yeah
• 53:53
  she sees a mouse turn into a fully sized human
• 53:57
  and then decides oh hang on that's like 50 mice
• 54:03
  in a in a body i could eat that what that that
• 54:10
  cat is gonna get like put down if it bites a
• 54:13
  human you know what i mean as it should it should
• 54:21
  be put down for thinking that this is this is
• 54:23
  50 mice in a human suit does it now like associate
• 54:27
  it's like hang on cinderella is also a human
• 54:31
  so she must be made of like you know 25 mice
• 54:34
  does she think this is pacific rim of human mech
• 54:43
  suits. What is the understanding of this world?
• 54:51
  Now, we already mentioned we don't really like
• 54:52
  this story and we think it's dog shit, but just
• 54:55
  to really grind it down, the Disney wiki does
• 54:57
  also note that Cinderella's sit in 1870 or 1880,
• 55:02
  but this has a Ferris wheel, which wasn't invented
• 55:04
  for at least a decade, so unwatchable. I hope
• 55:09
  someone got fired for that blunder. There's also
• 55:14
  a weird Tiananmen Square moment. What? Where
• 55:19
  the elephant's coming towards him and he sticks
• 55:22
  his hand up to stop him. Oh my god. Oh god. And
• 55:35
  then he gets turned back into a mouse and he
• 55:37
  wins. Better outcome, yeah. Jesus. Also, does
• 55:45
  the fairy godmother have Alzheimer's? Well, Cinderella
• 55:48
  did. What? Did she? The actress did. Is it infectious?
• 55:52
  Oh, no. Why does the fairy godmother have Alzheimer's
• 56:03
  now? keeps forgetting bippity boppity boo how
• 56:07
  is that hard to remember every single time honestly
• 56:11
  every time she's like about to do bippity boppity
• 56:15
  boo even in the first film she's like oh how
• 56:17
  does this go again uh it's charming and lovely
• 56:20
  in that one but then in the second one she oh
• 56:23
  my god be a dead horse like holy shit she just
• 56:27
  like I just did this about 17 minutes ago and
• 56:31
  I can't remember. Boppity, bippity, bip. I don't
• 56:35
  know. But yeah, she just can never remember the
• 56:38
  three words. Bippity, boppity, boo. Come on.
• 56:41
  What's the last one called? All right, it's Uncommon
• 56:44
  Romance time, isn't it? I feel like this is probably
• 56:46
  the one I got most to say about. So before we
• 56:48
  jump into Uncommon Romance, what did you think
• 56:50
  of the songs in this? I hated them. Yeah? I hated
• 56:54
  them. You hated them? They were terrible. Would
• 56:57
  you say they were like, awful and dog shit. They
• 57:01
  were dog shit. They were dog shit. They were
• 57:04
  so bad. I really did not like them. So you think
• 57:07
  the songs were dog shit? Yes. What are you setting
• 57:12
  me up for? I just thought that was a big thing
• 57:15
  considering they were written by a 16 year old
• 57:19
  girl. I thought she did her best, James. What
• 57:25
  the hell? They were written by a 16 year old.
• 57:28
  What the hell? Yeah, they're written by the 16
• 57:30
  -year -old, one of, like, the Disney Channel,
• 57:32
  like, you know, like, their little court of jesters
• 57:34
  with Miley Cyrus in that and Selena Gomez. This
• 57:37
  one was called Brooke Allison. She wrote these.
• 57:39
  No, no, no. Do not trap me in this because I've
• 57:42
  written about this and it's very sad. Oh, James,
• 57:45
  you think Brooke Allison's dog shit? No, no,
• 57:49
  I do not because she didn't do the other ones,
• 57:51
  did she? Did she do all of the songs? She did
• 57:54
  all the ones you just said were dog shit, yeah.
• 57:56
  well i've dug myself a hole here here we go so
• 57:59
  um reveal what happened make everyone sad so
• 58:03
  uh the songs were created by this lady called
• 58:05
  brooke allison who was 16 at the time uh she
• 58:08
  gave her a role i mean the songs don't really
• 58:09
  fit to be fair they're not like they're not good
• 58:11
  they don't fit with the original aesthetic they're
• 58:14
  kind of like poppy 2000 songs just kind of dropped
• 58:16
  in James thinks they're dog shit and James thinks
• 58:19
  that the person who made them is a dog shit person.
• 58:21
  I did not say this. This is slander. I will sue
• 58:25
  you. Following the release of this movie, Brooke
• 58:27
  Allison actually had a horrible health -related
• 58:32
  incident where she fell into a coma and never
• 58:35
  quite recovered and to this day is in a vegetative
• 58:37
  state. But that's alright by James' standards.
• 58:41
  Fuck you. I can't believe you did this to me.
• 58:47
  I wrote about... I was going to bring this up
• 58:49
  at the end because I was going to talk about
• 58:51
  the end song. It's not funny. I don't think it's
• 58:55
  funny. I'm not laughing either. I think it's
• 58:57
  very serious and there was a GoFundMe that you
• 58:59
  should go put your money in, Jims, for what you
• 59:03
  just said. It's genuinely horrible. I did not...
• 59:05
  no right i've taken i've taken andrew we are
• 59:09
  going to have words after this podcast you piece
• 59:12
  of shit i've taken the mic but like i was shocked
• 59:16
  when i read that like what the hell like horrible
• 59:18
  my partner um yeah we we looked up the end song
• 59:22
  um was that the bibbidi -bobbidi remix thing
• 59:26
  yeah yeah um it feels like kind of they were
• 59:31
  trying to get that shrek vibe and i got it It
• 59:36
  worked. It was all right. But yeah, then my partner
• 59:41
  looked at what happened to this poor girl. And
• 59:47
  yeah, it's genuinely horrific. Yeah, you wouldn't
• 59:52
  believe this. Like 2025 has only just been confirmed
• 59:57
  to be in like a vegetative state. It's horrible.
• 1:00:00
  It's awful. Which is really, really sad. and
• 1:00:05
  very very harrowing yeah like what like i okay
• 1:00:10
  mask off i agree the songs are not good and i
• 1:00:14
  think the main problem is like i wouldn't even
• 1:00:16
  blame her she's like a 16 year old pop star no
• 1:00:19
  not at all her music um the talent is there like
• 1:00:23
  she's yeah she's she's able to sing them i think
• 1:00:28
  the production of them isn't very good and i
• 1:00:30
  think that there's i totally agree the the kind
• 1:00:35
  of genre mismatching is like really heavy because
• 1:00:40
  it just does not fit what's going on kind of
• 1:00:43
  thing all the music in the first one is like
• 1:00:46
  part of the character like cinderella's actually
• 1:00:49
  singing the songs and like i think the only one
• 1:00:52
  where it's like almost not actually there is
• 1:00:54
  like so this is love at the end but then that
• 1:00:57
  is actually confirmed to be something everyone
• 1:00:59
  hears because the stepmother hears her singing
• 1:01:01
  that and then she like locks her away like the
• 1:01:03
  horrible cow she is um whereas in this one it
• 1:01:06
  does feel like here's a song it's completely
• 1:01:08
  separate what's going on and we dump it over
• 1:01:10
  the top of a montage like every time which is
• 1:01:12
  a bit disappointing but i just wanted to be a
• 1:01:15
  little rascal and trap you in your horrible little
• 1:01:18
  trap i'll kill you you'll put me in a vegetative
• 1:01:24
  snake james no put you in a mousetrap like i
• 1:01:27
  said i was gonna do last time so yeah that was
• 1:01:32
  probably a really dark thing for us to do but
• 1:01:34
  yeah but the feel bad feel bad uh i i said i
• 1:01:40
  said i liked her and you said you didn't so um
• 1:01:43
  and then you and then you took your mask off
• 1:01:45
  and you said you didn't so i don't like yeah
• 1:01:47
  that's true i did do that I like her. You can't
• 1:01:52
  win. Okay, let's move on, because I'm just going
• 1:01:55
  to keep digging this horrible little grave. I
• 1:01:57
  know. The next one's called An Uncommon Romance,
• 1:02:01
  and my God, this is what the goddamn movie should
• 1:02:04
  have been. What is going on? It really should
• 1:02:06
  have been just a longer version of this. Yeah.
• 1:02:09
  It was the best one, 100%. I mean, it's still
• 1:02:14
  not great, but it was way better than the other
• 1:02:17
  two. Yeah. So this is basically the stepsisters
• 1:02:21
  who have names, apparently. One's called Anastasia
• 1:02:25
  and this is about her. She's the redhead one.
• 1:02:27
  She meets a baker and she kind of like falls
• 1:02:31
  in love a bit. But the stepmother's like, she's
• 1:02:33
  beneath you. No, the other way around. He's beneath
• 1:02:36
  her. But she's like in love and Cinderella's
• 1:02:40
  like just such a nice person. She's like, I'll
• 1:02:42
  help you get with this guy. It's such a humanizing
• 1:02:44
  thing. And I think there's a fascinating story
• 1:02:47
  there of like, the stepsisters may not inherently
• 1:02:51
  be evil they've just been raised by this horrible
• 1:02:52
  monster yeah it's like a nature versus nurture
• 1:02:55
  kind of story yeah that we get to see for fucking
• 1:03:00
  20 minutes or whatever it is when it could have
• 1:03:03
  had the whole film as that there's almost an
• 1:03:06
  interesting idea there as well of like what happens
• 1:03:08
  when an abuser loses their victim like cinderella
• 1:03:12
  leaves she's safe now like lady tremaine kind
• 1:03:15
  of yeah she's not just gonna be like oh that
• 1:03:18
  sucks i guess i'll be a normal person now like
• 1:03:20
  she's gonna treat your daughters like shit now
• 1:03:21
  exactly and that's what we start seeing happening
• 1:03:25
  yeah yeah it's sad that this one wasn't longer
• 1:03:28
  yeah But then, even having said that, they didn't
• 1:03:32
  manage to fill the 20 -minute slot of this without
• 1:03:35
  having goddamn cat capers. They do an entire
• 1:03:39
  story where it's like, and Lucifer may get redeemed
• 1:03:41
  too because he fancies the white cat. And it's
• 1:03:43
  like, I don't care about this goddamn cat. I...
• 1:03:47
  I kind of liked it. No! Oh, no! I kind of enjoyed
• 1:03:52
  it. I thought it was really funny. I like the
• 1:03:55
  part where he comes into the room and he's all
• 1:03:58
  dressed up and he goes, Wow. It made me laugh
• 1:04:03
  a lot. No. I thought it was fun. I thought it
• 1:04:08
  was very harmless. This is even worse betrayal
• 1:04:11
  than what you said about Brooke Allison. Oh,
• 1:04:13
  come on. No, I can't believe that. Oh, my God.
• 1:04:18
  I hated it. I thought it was really cute and
• 1:04:21
  quite funny, actually. Oh, man. I liked it. Also,
• 1:04:25
  towards the end of his story, the mice do him
• 1:04:32
  a deal they're like oh yeah we'll we'll basically
• 1:04:35
  do what cinderella is doing to her step sister
• 1:04:38
  they'll teach you and yeah yeah exactly um and
• 1:04:43
  it only if you promise not to chase us again
• 1:04:46
  and he's like oh yeah yeah sure man sure man
• 1:04:48
  yeah yeah i'll do it and as soon as he gets what
• 1:04:51
  he wanted the little fucking rascal turns against
• 1:04:55
  them he's evil he needs to be put down he's called
• 1:04:59
  lucifer put him down i didn't get the bit where
• 1:05:04
  um so he he succeeds in getting with the cat
• 1:05:07
  and then they're like all right let's get these
• 1:05:08
  fucking mice the white cat gets like water poured
• 1:05:11
  on her head and she's just like annoyed and it
• 1:05:14
  wasn't even him yeah that pissed me off there
• 1:05:17
  was no possible way it could have been him she's
• 1:05:19
  just like I got wet now, so you can go fuck yourself.
• 1:05:22
  Yeah, he had another mouse in his hand. She was
• 1:05:25
  all the way on the other side of the table. I
• 1:05:26
  have no idea why it ended like that. But it did.
• 1:05:29
  It ended into a horrible story. But you liked
• 1:05:33
  it. That's fair enough. It was just fun. It was
• 1:05:35
  funny. I was laughing. I hated it. But I really
• 1:05:38
  liked the Anastasia stuff. Yeah, I think it was
• 1:05:41
  really nice. There's a part where it looks like
• 1:05:43
  Anastasia has... ariel's hair as well it's very
• 1:05:47
  yeah i noticed that it literally looks exactly
• 1:05:50
  the same but yeah it was lovely uh really nice
• 1:05:53
  kind of simple our first meeting kind of thing
• 1:05:57
  oh this is lovely kind of you know it sets up
• 1:06:00
  a bit of exposition of like the flowers in the
• 1:06:02
  market and she goes over she's like do i need
• 1:06:05
  these or maybe not and then she finds the baker
• 1:06:08
  she wants to fall in love like she's longingly
• 1:06:11
  looking at like a little like music box and all
• 1:06:14
  this stuff like yeah and it's very nice and it's
• 1:06:17
  lovely um i think in a longer version of this
• 1:06:21
  like you could get more into like their relationship
• 1:06:23
  because like i think it is in character for cinderella
• 1:06:25
  to be like okay you abused me for decades but
• 1:06:28
  i'm not gonna hold that against you i'm gonna
• 1:06:31
  put that one side i'm gonna help you be better
• 1:06:33
  That's in character, but for them to not have
• 1:06:36
  any conversation at all about, like, oh, yeah,
• 1:06:39
  I abused you for years, why are you doing this?
• 1:06:41
  Oh, yeah, man, I'm really sorry that that happened,
• 1:06:44
  kind of thing. It's like, no. But, again, it
• 1:06:47
  could be... No, I was going to say it could be
• 1:06:50
  quite heavy for a kids' film, but there's films
• 1:06:53
  that deal with a lot worse than that. Not a lot
• 1:06:56
  worse, you know what I mean, like, the higher
• 1:06:59
  kind of... I think, like, even just, like, if
• 1:07:03
  you don't get to like it's abuse and all it's
• 1:07:05
  like even if you just go like i bullied you for
• 1:07:07
  all these years that wasn't on yeah i think that's
• 1:07:09
  a good message for kids but they sorry but that
• 1:07:11
  was that was yeah that was the stepmother that
• 1:07:14
  you know i had to do it otherwise i was going
• 1:07:17
  to get bullied kind of thing blah blah blah yeah
• 1:07:19
  there could have been a nice rounded story in
• 1:07:23
  there and it's what it should have been but no
• 1:07:26
  we got Whatever that was. Yeah. We also get a
• 1:07:29
  cheeky little bit of false conflict again that
• 1:07:32
  resolves itself within 20 seconds. I hate these
• 1:07:36
  misunderstandings, which is like... Pisses me
• 1:07:39
  off. Yeah. What I'm assuming, he couldn't leave
• 1:07:43
  the shop because he had some bread in the oven,
• 1:07:45
  so he got someone to go and get the roses or
• 1:07:49
  the flowers that he was going to give to Anastasia.
• 1:07:52
  She saw a woman giving... him flowers or what
• 1:07:58
  looked like him giving her flowers kind of thing
• 1:08:00
  she doesn't even question it she's just like
• 1:08:03
  i'm out of here i'm running to the fountain where
• 1:08:05
  i was crying before it's so short as well where
• 1:08:08
  it's not like um like they hug and embrace like
• 1:08:11
  oh you're a good friend for doing this like There's
• 1:08:14
  one second where they're passing the flowers.
• 1:08:17
  That's when she looks. She turns around and in
• 1:08:19
  the background, you can see like her just walking
• 1:08:21
  away. It's like, if you just look. Yeah, exactly.
• 1:08:24
  It's such lazy script writing. Like if it was,
• 1:08:28
  if there was something like, oh, this had happened
• 1:08:30
  to her, something similar had happened to her
• 1:08:34
  in the past. Yeah, maybe. Like, yeah, it could
• 1:08:37
  have, like if they had explored that before,
• 1:08:40
  yeah, maybe that really quick glance. and seeing
• 1:08:44
  that could have worked for like a for like that
• 1:08:47
  false conflict but it just didn't work because
• 1:08:49
  it was literally huh what's happening oh no bye
• 1:08:53
  and then and then he walks up anyway and he's
• 1:08:56
  like oh that's fine like walks up he's like you
• 1:08:59
  really have to pad this out it's 20 minutes yeah
• 1:09:02
  it's less than 20 minutes because you got the
• 1:09:04
  cats doing their shit over there it's like 10
• 1:09:06
  minutes yeah and then wait what does it go back
• 1:09:10
  to after that i think that's it there's the the
• 1:09:12
  stepmother comes out and she's like you're dating
• 1:09:14
  a commoner and then she stands up for herself
• 1:09:16
  she's like oh i like this actually it looks like
• 1:09:19
  also when when lady tremaine the stepmother comes
• 1:09:22
  out cinderella's kind of like eavesdropping and
• 1:09:24
  watching not in a nice way she's making sure
• 1:09:27
  it's going all right looks like she's just gonna
• 1:09:29
  she's off like you're not gonna help your royalty
• 1:09:34
  Arrest her! I could arrest her! Yeah, put her
• 1:09:36
  in a bin! Shoot her or something! Just do anything!
• 1:09:41
  She's not the same in this either. Like, she
• 1:09:43
  goes from, like, this, like, real malicious villain
• 1:09:46
  to just kind of, like, a bit of a fuddy -duddy
• 1:09:48
  stick in the mud, like, I gotta do what mother
• 1:09:49
  says. It's like... Yeah. It's more like Principal
• 1:09:52
  Skinner's mother than, like, this horrible, cruel
• 1:09:55
  force. It does feel like an episode of a goddamn
• 1:09:59
  TV show that was cancelled because it wasn't
• 1:10:01
  good enough to make it to air. Yeah. But this
• 1:10:05
  is the only one, I would say. The first one's
• 1:10:07
  nothing, the second one's dog shit, and this
• 1:10:08
  one's the only one that has an inkling of a good
• 1:10:11
  idea. Yeah, it's got a redeeming kind of beginning
• 1:10:16
  of an idea, but it has not been fleshed out at
• 1:10:19
  all. It's a great idea to want to take a quote
• 1:10:22
  -unquote villain from the first one and actually
• 1:10:25
  kind of examine that. But it doesn't want to
• 1:10:28
  examine it. It wants to do this one little thing,
• 1:10:30
  and that's kind of depressing. So after that,
• 1:10:34
  Anastasia goes to the ball. She's very happy.
• 1:10:38
  And yeah, that's it. We cut back to the mice.
• 1:10:45
  They finish their book. They start running around
• 1:10:48
  to a high -pitched version of Bippity Boppity
• 1:10:51
  Boo. Bippity Boppity Boo! Bippity Boppity Boo!
• 1:10:55
  And they... the mice run down and they're like
• 1:10:58
  cinderelly cinderelly we made you a book and
• 1:11:00
  then she's like oh sick i love it i love it so
• 1:11:03
  much she hasn't even opened the book to even
• 1:11:07
  read it i love it i don't mind she's a she's
• 1:11:11
  a lovely person i love that you made me a book
• 1:11:13
  actually she's yeah it's very yeah as much as
• 1:11:16
  i want to rag on this i love that character she's
• 1:11:18
  just so sweet Yeah, dreams do come true, and
• 1:11:21
  they all sit down. Dreams come true because it's
• 1:11:24
  fucking nightmare ends. And they start reading
• 1:11:28
  the book, and Cinderella opens the book, and
• 1:11:30
  she's looking, and she's like, oh, wow, the book
• 1:11:34
  is fucking blank. Like, they didn't even bother
• 1:11:37
  putting any, like, a tiny bit of scribble in
• 1:11:42
  the book. She opens the book, she's like, wow.
• 1:11:48
  And it's fucking blank. It'd be really great
• 1:11:52
  if they put those lost storyboards in the book.
• 1:11:56
  Wow, this looks like dog shit. This looks like
• 1:12:01
  a cancelled TV show. Anyway, that's fucking...
• 1:12:07
  whatever it's called. Cinderella 2, dreams come
• 1:12:09
  true. Dreams come true. And that's the end of
• 1:12:13
  it, and I don't want to talk about it ever again
• 1:12:15
  in my life. I... don't like this movie. I fucking
• 1:12:20
  do not enjoy this. Should we get this ranked?
• 1:12:25
  Should we plug it into the ranking? I reckon
• 1:12:29
  so. So, James, with our ranking system, we have
• 1:12:42
  four tiers. We start at the very top. We call
• 1:12:44
  this one Disney Classics. This is something that
• 1:12:47
  would meet the original, if not exceed it. Something
• 1:12:54
  that should be on the shelf next to the original.
• 1:12:57
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. It currently has one occupant,
• 1:13:00
  Fantasia 2000. Yeah, baby. Let's go. Next, we've
• 1:13:05
  got Diamond Edition. Now, this isn't technically
• 1:13:07
  just one of their... creme de la creme movies
• 1:13:10
  but this is something that like you get a nice
• 1:13:13
  little collector's edition of like oh that's
• 1:13:14
  good oh nice little slip cover um by the way
• 1:13:20
  speaking of which this had absolute dog shit
• 1:13:22
  special features it was like nothing on the disc
• 1:13:24
  oh really so it tells you where they think it
• 1:13:28
  should go next we have straight to video which
• 1:13:33
  is uh we've made a thing it's on video Buy it
• 1:13:36
  if you want to. Maybe your kids will enjoy it.
• 1:13:39
  That has one occupant now as well, Bambi 2. We
• 1:13:44
  have the bottom tier, which is Bargain Bin. They've
• 1:13:46
  made it. It's on straight to DVD, but you don't
• 1:13:49
  even buy it. It's not been on the shelves for
• 1:13:53
  five minutes before it's put into the Bargain
• 1:13:56
  Bin because they know it's going to fucking fail.
• 1:13:58
  They know that there's no point in even making
• 1:14:01
  this. It's a tax break. Yeah. so with that bargain
• 1:14:07
  bin put this film bargain bin put it in the fucking
• 1:14:12
  bargain bin this sucks yeah i i really fought
• 1:14:17
  for a little bit in the third one like oh this
• 1:14:19
  might be complicated if this is a really great
• 1:14:21
  shot but they failed to get any of the like it's
• 1:14:25
  still quite okay like i guess like as its own
• 1:14:28
  thing it's fine but it's not as interesting as
• 1:14:31
  it should have been and Any of the deliberations
• 1:14:34
  I thought I was going to have about this is gone.
• 1:14:36
  I agree. Bargain bin. Absolute dog shit. It sucks.
• 1:14:42
  It sucks. And it's so annoying how much Disney
• 1:14:46
  do this as well. They're like, oh, we've got
• 1:14:47
  to put tape fucking three episodes of a TV show
• 1:14:50
  and put on a DVD and those goddamn idiot kids
• 1:14:52
  will buy it. What's really weird about this,
• 1:14:55
  and this is jumping ahead quite a bit, so I won't
• 1:14:58
  get too into the weeds on this one, but the first
• 1:15:01
  of these directed DVD things was Return to Jafar.
• 1:15:05
  That's like the Kickstarter thing. And when that
• 1:15:08
  was getting made, like, the guy who was, like,
• 1:15:10
  making the show, like, he kind of had a fight
• 1:15:12
  for that. Like, Disney were like, nah, this is
• 1:15:13
  going to cheapen the brand. He's like, no, this
• 1:15:14
  is a story I really want to tell. I think it
• 1:15:16
  should be this. And they did test footage in
• 1:15:18
  that. And that was eight years before this. So
• 1:15:20
  I think it's mad that you go from, like, within
• 1:15:22
  eight years, like, and I'm not saying Return
• 1:15:25
  to Jafar is great. But it's a story. It has a
• 1:15:28
  beginning. It has a middle. It has an end. Within
• 1:15:32
  eight years, you go from having to convince Disney
• 1:15:35
  to release this. to you just sticking three cancelled
• 1:15:39
  episodes of a terrible tv show onto a goddamn
• 1:15:43
  dvd you have the nerve to come into my goddamn
• 1:15:46
  country and put this in the goddamn cinema how
• 1:15:50
  dare you imagine being the person that was so
• 1:15:53
  excited for this and you just got like a polished
• 1:15:57
  turd slammed in between a book cover like This
• 1:16:04
  sucks. It does. It really does suck. If it's
• 1:16:09
  not good enough for the TV, bro, it's not going
• 1:16:11
  to be good enough for the movies. I got a couple
• 1:16:13
  of Letterboxd reviews. You guys can follow us
• 1:16:17
  on Letterboxd. which we will give you our ats
• 1:16:23
  at the end. But this is from Robin, who rated
• 1:16:27
  it two and a half stars and said, I think we
• 1:16:30
  can all agree, why wasn't the Anastasia story
• 1:16:34
  just the plot for the full film? Which is exactly
• 1:16:36
  what we think. Yeah. It's so obvious to everyone
• 1:16:42
  except for the guys who made this. Shafralas
• 1:16:44
  says, I think this follows on from his Cinderella
• 1:16:48
  1 review, which I saw, saying that he was glad
• 1:16:52
  that Lucifer died at the end of this. And he
• 1:16:56
  says, two and a half stars was disappointed to
• 1:16:58
  find out that Lucifer was not canonically dead
• 1:17:00
  after his fall at the end of the first movie.
• 1:17:05
  There's a few, like... five -star reviews that
• 1:17:09
  are just people being like hell yeah this is
• 1:17:12
  my like childhood yeah my black panther that's
• 1:17:19
  fascinating to me like i i would actually love
• 1:17:22
  to like hear more for like i know they're not
• 1:17:24
  gonna put it in the letterbox but like no but
• 1:17:26
  i wanna i wanna talk to someone about why this
• 1:17:29
  film like slaps for them yeah because this sucks
• 1:17:32
  yeah Two stars from Austin278 that says Cinderella
• 1:17:39
  cross Cinderella tick. I do like Cinderella.
• 1:17:46
  I do like Cinderella. I wrote Cinderella in the
• 1:17:49
  note. Yeah. I wrote it as if it was Beetlejuice.
• 1:17:53
  I wrote Cinderella for the first note and then
• 1:17:54
  Cinderella, Cinderella for the second note. One
• 1:17:59
  star by Terminal. The first movie to be written
• 1:18:04
  by literal mice. One star from Jack King. There
• 1:18:09
  were two funny moments, but this was mostly really
• 1:18:11
  bad. Completely pointless in every regard, and
• 1:18:14
  beyond that, it's incredibly dull. The songs
• 1:18:16
  aren't good. Yeah, it's all Lucifer's parts in
• 1:18:19
  the end. Does he actually say that? No. He doesn't
• 1:18:26
  actually say what they are. He won't play his
• 1:18:29
  cards. He's keeping them close. He's keeping
• 1:18:33
  his one -star review very close to his chest.
• 1:18:35
  He also says, the songs aren't good either, and
• 1:18:38
  most everything that happens is quite corny.
• 1:18:40
  Couldn't bring myself to enjoy it. I'm not going
• 1:18:43
  to lie, I can't be bothered to look at it anymore.
• 1:18:45
  That's fair. I think that's a decent mix. It
• 1:18:48
  sounds like the only people that have love for
• 1:18:50
  this is because of nostalgia, which is fair.
• 1:18:52
  I'm not going to criticise anyone who has nostalgia,
• 1:18:55
  but... We all have nostalgia for different things,
• 1:18:58
  don't we? Yeah. I wonder if it is just like,
• 1:19:00
  I like these characters and I like being in this
• 1:19:02
  world, but I can't imagine you watching this
• 1:19:05
  as a 30 -year -old man as we are and finding
• 1:19:10
  anything but misery and pain. Oh, God. Well...
• 1:19:14
  I tell you what, Andy, I'm glad to be leaving
• 1:19:18
  Cinderella behind. It's going to be nice to get
• 1:19:21
  away from this kingdom and, you know, jet off
• 1:19:26
  somewhere else. Jet off far, far away from here.
• 1:19:30
  And, you know, not have to... What are you saying?
• 1:19:34
  What's wrong? They made a third one. And we'll
• 1:19:41
  be right back next week. or in two weeks with
• 1:19:45
  Cinderella 3 a twist in time woo it's Cinderella
• 1:19:50
  month baby oh a twist in time there's time travel
• 1:19:56
  so I don't know much I haven't seen this one
• 1:19:59
  again I will tell you this I hope it gives you
• 1:20:03
  something because you don't sound well thanks
• 1:20:06
  man thanks man I mean, you don't sound well.
• 1:20:12
  I was not enjoying the last of this. You don't
• 1:20:15
  sound like this has been a good experience for
• 1:20:18
  you. But I will give you this. I've heard that
• 1:20:23
  this is a banger. Okay. As far as Disney's traded
• 1:20:27
  DVD sequels go, it's not going to be like fucking
• 1:20:29
  No Country for Old Men, but it's going to, as
• 1:20:32
  far as these go, apparently it's quite good.
• 1:20:35
  so we'll see if they can make up for this absolute
• 1:20:38
  goddamn hellscape but maybe they just maybe they
• 1:20:41
  just you know they go back in time and they fix
• 1:20:44
  the fucking anastasia story in the last one and
• 1:20:47
  then they just you know release that uh i mean
• 1:20:51
  i don't want to spoil anything but from what
• 1:20:52
  i understand we have a very cause kind of situation
• 1:20:55
  where you know like cause one was kind of cool
• 1:20:57
  and then cause two was like a spy thing it's
• 1:20:59
  like what the fuck is this and then cause three
• 1:21:01
  doesn't even acknowledge it happened Oh, interesting.
• 1:21:05
  I think they're just like, move on. Yeah, they're
• 1:21:08
  just like, that didn't happen. Don't worry about
• 1:21:10
  that book. That book went onto the fire. The
• 1:21:13
  mice went in it. And so did Lucifer. I've just
• 1:21:18
  seen that this has a post -credits scene. Wait,
• 1:21:21
  what does? It's a trailer three. Oh, I'm fine
• 1:21:26
  with that. Like, oh God, I thought you meant
• 1:21:28
  Cinderella 2. I thought we had to pause the podcast
• 1:21:31
  and go and watch it. Oh my God, you scared me.
• 1:21:35
  It won't hit as well if we don't watch it with
• 1:21:37
  the full context of the movie. Oh God. No, yeah,
• 1:21:41
  this one's done. Thank God. We're not quite out
• 1:21:44
  of the woods yet with Cinderella, but it can't
• 1:21:48
  get worse. Famous last words, but yeah, we'll
• 1:21:50
  see. Anyway, that about wraps it up, doesn't
• 1:21:54
  it? It does, yeah. Well, what a week. What a
• 1:21:59
  time. What a time. Oh, man, I just realised next
• 1:22:03
  week could be our first actual sequel where a
• 1:22:06
  story with a beginning, middle and end follows
• 1:22:08
  the events of the first movie. Oh, that's a knee
• 1:22:12
  slapper right there. That's crazy. I can't believe
• 1:22:15
  it. So, folks, if you want a sequel, if you actually
• 1:22:20
  want a proper, you know, dictionary definition
• 1:22:24
  of a sequel join us next week baby as Harry Styles
• 1:22:29
  would call it it's a movie film but I guess we'll
• 1:22:34
  have to put a cork in it right now and come back
• 1:22:36
  to Cinderella in the meantime James where can
• 1:22:38
  the folks find you You can find me on Instagram
• 1:22:42
  at Jimmy Smerds. You can find me on Letterboxd.
• 1:22:48
  My name is Narumph on there. N -A -H -R -U -M
• 1:22:52
  -P -H if you also search James Smerden. I'll
• 1:22:55
  probably come up. Am I on anything else? I don't
• 1:22:58
  think so. What about you, Andy? You're on a goddamn
• 1:23:00
  watch list. I'm on... Instagram at Oatmansmovies.
• 1:23:05
  That's O -A -T -M -U -N -S movies. I'm also on
• 1:23:09
  Letterboxd at Odie Boat. And, of course, the
• 1:23:11
  podcast itself has its own Instagram. We're following
• 1:23:14
  because James is cooking up some fire stuff for
• 1:23:16
  that right now. That's at AfterEverAfterPod.
• 1:23:20
  Yeah, and if you've got any lovely correspondence,
• 1:23:23
  please email us at AfterEverAfterPod at gmail
• 1:23:28
  .com. Where's our cinder heads? Yeah, come on.
• 1:23:32
  Where are you guys? Get in here, because we're
• 1:23:35
  about to do Cinderella 3. We know you've seen
• 1:23:35
  this movie. Yeah, and we need to hear from you,
• 1:23:38
  and we need to hear if you like this film. And
• 1:23:41
  we also would like to thank Joe Turone for our
• 1:23:44
  fantastic music. He did the intro theme, he did
• 1:23:46
  the sting theme, and we've got Jordan, who is
• 1:23:49
  our producer, and he has pretty much designed
• 1:23:52
  the artwork. We love you, Jordan! And then a
• 1:23:56
  big thank you to you, Andy, for editing the podcast
• 1:23:59
  together. Oh, it is always a complete pleasure.
• 1:24:04
  I'm sure. Especially with this one. Hell yeah.
• 1:24:08
  I'm so excited. And thank you, James, for all
• 1:24:12
  the work you're doing on the Instagram. I'm very
• 1:24:14
  excited to see that coming through because you've
• 1:24:15
  sent me one and it was hilarious. i'm excited
• 1:24:19
  for more to come so i'm gonna get a nice little
• 1:24:22
  backlog of them and then uh we'll be posting
• 1:24:26
  those uh over on instagram uh youtube shorts
• 1:24:30
  and we're gonna make a tiktok as well which hopefully
• 1:24:33
  if it's taken if it's not taken it'll be after
• 1:24:37
  ever after pod if anything changes we will put
• 1:24:40
  it in the description so just keep an eye out
• 1:24:42
  um it will be coming soon yeah Lovely. All right.
• 1:24:48
  Andy, we've done another one. Another one in
• 1:24:51
  the bag. Good job. Yeah. And each of our four
• 1:24:55
  quadrants, well, never mind. Three of our four
• 1:24:58
  quadrants have an inhabitant now at Disney Classics
• 1:25:02
  straight out of the bargain bin. I wonder if
• 1:25:04
  that means Cinderella 3 is going to be Diamond
• 1:25:06
  Edition or not. We'll have to find out. I hope
• 1:25:11
  so. I can't do another one of these. That was
• 1:25:12
  goddamn painful. yeah i'm i'm not looking forward
• 1:25:17
  to another bargain bin this was not fun hey andy
• 1:25:21
  yes i'll see you after ever after i'll see you
• 1:25:24
  after ever after take care see you next time
• 1:25:27
  bye love you bye