Latest / Voices for Voices® / Beyond the Battlefield: PTSD Affects Us All | Ep 267

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Beyond the Battlefield: PTSD Affects Us All | Ep 267 · Voices for Voices®

• 0:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Hey everyone, welcome to another episode of the Voices for Voices TV show and podcast.
• 0:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm your host.
• 0:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Founder of Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes.
• 0:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thank you so much for joining us on this episode.
• 0:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We are now at 267 episodes overall in studio out of studio episodes overall in studio out of studio Just incredible feat to hit as a milestone.
• 0:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Thank you for watching, for listening, for being supporters of Voices for Voices.
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• 0:54
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• 1:02
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• 1:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Click on the link.
• 1:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Support our show and our organization and that will get you to where you need to be.
• 1:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Ptsd PTSD stands for Post-traumatic stress dysfunction and we're going to get into some of the specific post-traumatic stress disorder.
• 1:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There we go.
• 1:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Third time's the charm.
• 2:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So PTSD, ptsd I'll talk about what it is and how.
• 2:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It doesn't always have to relate to military service has tended to be in the past, the biggest contributor being in and around war.
• 2:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Loud sounds, fighter jets, ammunition shooting, missiles all these things seeing casualties, seeing people injured and gravely injured, and that can carry a heavy burden to any and all individuals that are involved, not just the military members themselves, but when they come home, the families, the friends.
• 3:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It all gets connected.
• 3:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we're bringing PTSD up in this show because on this Friday, if I have my calendar correctly here so I'm just going to double check I believe it's Friday.
• 3:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So this Friday is what we call here in the United States the 4th of July, independence Day, and one of the big things that tends to get associated with Independence Day, the 4th of July, the 4th, are fireworks, and fireworks, by their very nature, while they are colorful, they let off a sound, and some of the sounds are really loud, some of them are really in succession that might sound like gunfire.
• 4:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody was in the military or is in the military, and so they can bring back some of those, some of those memories that are embedded in our mind Before we get there.
• 4:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I want to just go into a little bit of a history lesson for me and for you about what is the Fourth of July, what is Independence Day First off.
• 5:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Here in the United States the 4th of July is a, and so I'm referring to Wikipedia.
• 5:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So there'll be times I'll be reading directly from there.
• 5:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm not claiming that this is my own information.
• 5:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: A lot of it's coming from Wikipedia.
• 5:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: When we get to the PTSD and that and kind of the second half of our show, that won't be Wikipedia, That'll be lived experience from me and others, lived experience for me and others.
• 5:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So the fourth is a federal holiday, which basically means that any organization you know court, the post office they observe that day as a holiday.
• 6:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And it was that day as a holiday and it was established in July 4th, 1776, which actually is when the United States of America was established.
• 6:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So let's get into some background.
• 6:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So Independence Day can be associated with fireworks, as I mentioned, parades, barbecues, cookouts, picnics, fairs, carnivals, baseball games, family reunions, political speeches, ceremonies and other various public and private events, and so we would get to a little bit closer to that PTSD.
• 7:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we talk about the observance of the Fourth of July.
• 7:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So 1776 is when it started.
• 7:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: In 1777, 13 gunshots were fired in salute, once that morning and once in the evening, as evening fell on July 4th in Bristol, rhode Island, and there's a similar celebration in Philadelphia 13 gun salutes, speeches, prayers, music, parades, troop reviews and fireworks.
• 7:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Ships were, if they weren't on a mission, they were at port and they're decked in red, white and blue.
• 7:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And 1781 is when the Massachusetts General Court became the first state legislature to recognize July 4th as a state celebration.
• 8:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And we talk about different customs of July 4th as a state celebration and we talk about different customs of July 4th.
• 8:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's marked by patriotic displays.
• 8:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Again, federal courts, postal service, all non-essential federal institutions.
• 8:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's a holiday, it's a federal holiday, it's a federal holiday, and so the legal holiday does remain on July 4th.
• 8:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But if that date right, we have seven days of the week, and if July 4th falls on a Saturday or Sunday, then the federal government, employees and organizations that observe the 4th will instead take the day off on the adjacent Friday or Monday.
• 8:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So if the 4th falls on Saturday, friday would be that day.
• 8:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If it falls on Sunday, then Monday would be that day, then Monday would be that day.
• 9:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, we as families, we often have celebrations, picnics, barbecues, long weekend of just hanging out and lots of parades.
• 9:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: In many towns, many cities, the night before the 4th was once a point of celebrations marked by raucous gatherings, often incorporating bonfires as their highlight.
• 9:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Independence Day, the 4th of July, fireworks are often accompanied by patriotic songs, like our national anthem, the Star-Spangled Banner.
• 9:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: God Bless America.
• 9:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: America the Beautiful, my Country, tis of Thee, this Land is your Land, stars and Stripes Forever, yankee Doodle.
• 10:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: God Bless the USA, among many, many others.
• 10:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Fireworks shows are held in many states.
• 10:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: As far as celebrations, wherever you know, a city, a town you know would have a particular time to gather for those fireworks displays.
• 10:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But also fireworks are also sold for personal use or other than a public show, and so when we get to that point, right, so we're taking it down a level, and so there are safety concerns that come with that.
• 10:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's led some states to ban fireworks outside of public shows or to limit the sizes and the types allowed, and so that's important.
• 11:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some occasions, mostly close to the fourth, the public may be prohibited from purchasing or discharging fireworks, but again, the public displays, the professional displays, like those at sports events, may still take place.
• 11:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: A salute of one gun for each state in the United States is called a salute to the Union, and it is fired on the 4th of July, independence Day at noon by any capable military base.
• 11:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If we talk about size of gatherings and firework displays public displays it appears that New York City has the largest fireworks display in the country and it's sponsored by Macy's, and this is just mind-blowing that with that, there are 22 tons that exploded, and this is in 2009.
• 12:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we're what?
• 12:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: 16 years removed from that.
• 12:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That number probably has grown.
• 12:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Generally, we're talking about this in New York, the largest display is generally held over the East River and it is Independence Day, which, july 4th, the first week of July, is one of typically the busiest United States travel periods, as many people use what we call, by having a federal holiday on Friday or Monday, a three-day holiday weekend for extended vacation trips.
• 13:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Getting that extra day can help with the travel, help with the travel, and it is it actually.
• 13:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The Philippines also celebrates July 4th as its Republic Day to commemorate the day in 1946 when it ceased to be a US territory and the United States officially recognized Philippine independence.
• 13:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And July 4th was intentionally chosen by the United States because it corresponds to its Independence Day, and so this day was observed in the Philippines as Independence Day, and so this day was observed in the Philippines as Independence Day until 1962.
• 14:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then, in 1964, the name of July 4th.
• 14:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The July 4th holiday was changed to Republic Day.
• 14:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Rebuild National Park in Denmark is said to hold the largest July 4th celebrations outside of the United States.
• 14:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's a little bit of history to talk about Independence Day, july 4th, and so we transition into PTSD, into PTSD.
• 14:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And PTSD again doesn't only happen to, cannot only happen to service members of the military past, present and future that enter, but it can happen, being the trauma which is post-traumatic stress disorder.
• 15:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It can happen for various reasons.
• 15:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Maybe we trip and fall and we'll get bad cuts on our arms and our legs, and maybe we have to go to the hospital and get treated and maybe that's a point of trauma.
• 15:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, yeah, that's not being at war, hearing that you know gunfire and that.
• 15:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But in our mind, our mind, our mind doesn, our mind, our mind doesn't, as I put this way, as strong as our mind is, our mind is not able to disassociate one point of trauma with another.
• 16:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: All trauma goes together, just like stress, bad stress or negative stress, or good stress of wow, I'm going to start a new job and I'm going to get paid extra and then get a bonus and go on family vacations or go into the zoo, whatever that may be, stress is stress in our body.
• 16:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: On family vacations or going to the zoo, whatever that may be, stress is stress in our body and trauma is trauma.
• 16:32
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's different types of trauma and so, with the Fourth of July coming up and we talk about fireworks being one of the big things that's associated with the Fourth of July.
• 16:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Public shows, you know, usually are much larger, the show lasts much longer, gunfire and the like, which can take our minds back to a point in time when we may have heard that and we don't have to just be in the military again.
• 17:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It could be somebody who unfortunately faced a crime and there were gunshots.
• 17:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Even they weren't gunshots, any sense of trauma.
• 17:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Trauma take the toll on our body.
• 17:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So fireworks is just a good way to, given where we're at in the year, is just a good way to transition and talk about PTSD.
• 17:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I have it from a lot of things and a lot of the things are things that I did myself and so that can happen, bringing things a little bit closer.
• 18:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: One of our mission trips that we hold from time to time with Voices for Voices, we went to Ukraine a couple of years ago to be with the people who we were able to interview, a couple of folks, one in the legislature, ina Susan and we really appreciate her time and the work that she does in the Ukrainian parliament and so we were able to sit down at a coffee shop and talk.
• 18:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That episode is within our 267 episode catalog library.
• 18:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You scroll through on your favorite platform and watch or listen to that episode.
• 18:54
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It was very moving, very powerful.
• 18:56
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was very nervous, I was on edge, and that was because, at that point in time, russia had a continuous barrage of firing missiles many of them and drone attacks during the evening hours, when, when that's usually resting time.
• 19:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I can remember one distinct example, and that is actually my last night that I was there in Kiev and there was a missile that was shot into Ukraine and it was intercepted, thank goodness, but the sound was like one of the loudest sounds I've ever heard.
• 19:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It sounded like gunfire on a, on a level of a hundred times what that sound like.
• 20:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so that was a point of it woke me up in the middle of the night and not in a dead sleep like that.
• 20:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But you know, I was, I was out, I was sleeping and it takes a lot to wake me up.
• 20:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That just has any money in my family.
• 20:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I like my sleep, I love my sleep, I love my rest.
• 20:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Um, and instead of wake me up, it takes quite a feat to do that.
• 20:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And and so when I heard that, I was like, oh my gosh, is where I'm staying.
• 20:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Was that hit?
• 20:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Is there somewhere nearby?
• 20:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then come to find out that the missile was intercepted and so I'm not in the military.
• 20:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I was never in the military.
• 20:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: My father, my grandfathers, both served in the military and we thank everybody past, present and if you go in in the future, thank you for your service to our country.
• 21:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And whatever country you're from, you're not from the United States.
• 21:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know we value that as humans.
• 21:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so at that time I took that sound and that experience and when I arrived back here at the United States and not just the public the 4th of July, because I went, I believe it was in June, I believe it was in late May.
• 21:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Early June is when I went.
• 21:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I believe it was in June, I believe it was in late May.
• 21:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Early June is when I went to Ukraine.
• 21:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So the 4th of July was right around the corner, and so it was very fresh in my mind.
• 21:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so, yeah, there were public displays, public shows, and so we could hear at our house some, and so we could hear at our house some and I kind of, when I would hear the sounds and the explosions of the fireworks, the sounds that they make, I would jump in any war.
• 22:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I wasn't in the service.
• 22:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And then we have what I explain here towards the end of our little history lesson on Wikipedia about independence in the United States.
• 22:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so we know right that sometimes the laws are followed, sometimes they're not, and even if they are, you know individual people in the neighborhood or nearby.
• 22:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know they set off their fireworks that they bought, they purchased, and what ends up happening, at least is my experience.
• 23:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we have July 4th this year in 2025, on a Friday.
• 23:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, this past Saturday and Sunday started to hear hear in there fireworks and sounds, and I know that you know once, once, once it gets dark a little bit later in the evening tonight and tomorrow and Wednesday and Thursday and obviously Friday, and then some public shows also go on Saturday and Sunday and some could go on other days as well.
• 23:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I would say maybe you know, a two-week period where you know hearing the explosions, lord, right now that we don't have a conflict here on our soil, that other areas of the world that they do have, and I thank God for that.
• 24:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so here's two weeks that I could be put off kilter a little bit and it's one of these things that it's not.
• 24:25
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's not like it's hard to talk about, because when we share this type of information, if we have a counselor, a psychiatrist, like I do, I share and talk about things like this To somebody that may not have those experiences, it doesn't necessarily mean they don't understand per se, necessarily mean they don't understand per se.
• 25:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It just means that a little more understanding of like, okay, if my family member, my significant other, if some bother my significant other, if you know sounds, you know like, bother, bother the individual, then we just need to respect that and be okay with it.
• 25:28
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It doesn't mean we don't want to spend time with family and that, but there's a lot of times where I don't.
• 25:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: When it comes to fireworks and that, where I enjoy seeing them, I enjoy, I'm blessed to be able to have my eyesight and I love seeing the colors and the different patterns, but the sounds make again make me more alert, and it kind of takes me back to that time when I was in Ukraine.
• 26:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But then also there's other points of trauma in my life that you know.
• 26:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: A lot of them I've talked about here on our show from time to time, and you may have trauma as well, and it doesn't make us any less of a person.
• 26:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It doesn't mean that we have anything wrong with us.
• 26:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: All it means is we're affected in different ways than some others and some of the other people.
• 26:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There may be other things that bother them and cause them additional stress and additional anxiety that aren't related like that.
• 27:02
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I wanted to talk about PTSD post-traumatic stress disorder.
• 27:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We've talked about it a little bit before on different shows, about a little bit before on different shows.
• 27:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But because we are in the week of Independence Day, the 4th of July, we're with you.
• 27:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We remain with you.
• 27:30
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If fireworks and sound transport you back to another point in time, it's okay.
• 27:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's okay.
• 27:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We can talk to people, we can talk to professionals.
• 27:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm going to plug going and visiting a therapist or psychiatrist.
• 27:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're so past the point of having that bother us and to feel like others are judging us.
• 28:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Maybe they are.
• 28:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So what Therapy helps me get through a lot of life.
• 28:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Maybe you have to take medication, like I do.
• 28:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's nothing wrong with that and don't let anybody tell you that there's anything wrong with that, because there's not Because you are standing up for yourself.
• 28:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You're standing up for your health, your mental health, your physical health, and so if somebody goes and gets blood drawn to have different tests run, that person is going to a doctor to have a test done.
• 29:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's no different than going to a psychiatrist or a therapist and having a visit, or many visits like me since 2017 that I've lost count.
• 29:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But it's one of those things that, no matter where I am in life, no matter how, maybe I'm going through a good spell where things aren't as stressful and aren't affecting me as much, and then there's times when I'm ultra stressed, and so I'm able to reach out to my therapist, my psychiatrist, to be able to talk through what's happening.
• 30:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yeah, we can have standing appointments where every three weeks or every four weeks or every week or every other month, we might have an in-person, or a other month we might have an in-person or a Zoom meeting.
• 30:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But life doesn't only just happen on those days and times.
• 30:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Life happens 24-7.
• 30:43
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The clock keeps ticking, tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, and there's going to be things that we're going to be able to handle better than others, and all we're doing is asking for a little bit of help.
• 31:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: When my car needs an oil change, I go get the oil change.
• 31:06
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't go.
• 31:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh my gosh, what am I going to do?
• 31:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: What's somebody going to think?
• 31:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I just go get the oil change?
• 31:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I don't go.
• 31:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Oh my God, what am I going to do?
• 31:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: What's somebody going to think?
• 31:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Let's go get my oil change?
• 31:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody wants to judge that.
• 31:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Okay, they can do that.
• 31:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Same thing with the mental health.
• 31:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Somebody might judge me Okay, but I need to do what I need to do and I need to give myself self-care, self-love, because I'm not able to give anything if my cup isn't even a drop or two full.
• 31:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's not just a cliche, it's the real deal.
• 31:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We can't do things, we can't spend time in groups and with loud music or fireworks.
• 32:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We can't do that if we don't take care of ourselves.
• 32:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And for that person that goes and gets a blood draw, check for cholesterol or what have you, that person's no different than me or you, where we say you know what, I'll get checked out and be okay with it, not worry what the result is, not worry about people say I've been there, done that, I've gone through those phases and they're hard right.
• 32:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You're trying to in a way, hide the fact that you know you have a therapy appointment or a psychiatrist appointment or they're taking medication and then all those things.
• 33:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then they're done that.
• 33:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Is it uncomfortable at first?
• 33:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yeah, a little bit.
• 33:17
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: The other first time I was in a club where I, in my earlier years I would be consuming a lot of alcohol, and so that first time I was in an environment like that, with the loud music and the drink flowing, I very easily could have fell off the wagon and started drinking and I'm like, well, I'm just going to have one.
• 33:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But that's not how my mind works, that's not how all Justin works, and I had to learn that.
• 33:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It took a lot of time.
• 33:59
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But once I got through that that time, then it made the second time and the third time and the fourth time, et cetera made it much easier.
• 34:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I was like what are you drinking?
• 34:16
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm drinking water, I'm drinking club soda or sparkling water, and be okay with that.
• 34:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yeah, nobody going to love you, if you don't have that love for yourself and you may think it's cliche or what it's the truth, just like everything else that we talk about that if we don't believe in what we're doing, if we don't believe in the mission, the vision, if we don't, how are we going to lead and rally people together to join us together as one, one human being family with voices for voices?
• 35:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so that's why I'm passionate.
• 35:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: One of the big reasons I'm passionate Because I believe in myself.
• 35:40
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yes, there's days where I don't, and they're hard and I don't want to do anything and I question are we making a difference?
• 35:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Are we really helping people?
• 35:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And you know, look at some, you know analytics and just go oh, justin, you know, here's where we're at.
• 36:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so, yeah, I have a lot of down days and it takes a heck of a lot to get out of those days and it takes a heck of a lot to get out of those.
• 36:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But by having a team, having a therapist, having a psychiatrist, being able to cope as much as I can with strategies I've learned through therapy over the years, I'm able to cope much better, much safer than if her then I didn't have that team together.
• 36:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I'll talk about the sport of baseball.
• 36:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Right, you have the pitcher, and it was just the pitcher pitching to a batter.
• 36:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It was just the pitcher pitching to a batter.
• 36:52
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It'd be hard to field and catch the ball and run to the different bases to record an out, get three outs so you can come to bat.
• 37:03
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so I picture the team behind him or her, and so I picture as a team behind them or her catcher first base, second base, shortstop, third base, left field, center field, right field coaches, pinch hitters, defensive specialists.
• 37:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so have that team, your experience in PTSD, defensive specialists.
• 37:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so have that team, your experience in PTSD, whether that's related to military service or whether it's not, whether it's a relationship.
• 37:46
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We've had a hard time getting over and we just need somebody to talk to.
• 37:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We all, majority of us have these phones that we text, we call, we email, we instant message.
• 38:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We do all these things, we do all this communication, and some of that can be detrimental.
• 38:24
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So why not have outlets that you can reach out to, and I can reach out to, and this isn't me just preaching of?
• 38:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Well, you should do this.
• 38:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm living it.
• 38:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm living what I'm saying.
• 38:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm on medication.
• 38:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do I want to be?
• 38:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No, do I wish I could go back to that lifestyle partying and that some days?
• 38:58
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Yeah, but I'm content.
• 39:01
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Do I wish I didn't have to go to a psychiatrist or therapist at this point?
• 39:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No, because I know I need them so much.
• 39:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: At the beginning, at my bottom, at my lowest, yeah, I was like I don't even talk to these people.
• 39:15
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If people don't know me, they can't help me.
• 39:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I can help myself, I can.
• 39:19
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You know, I can do a search online on my phone.
• 39:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I can.
• 39:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Whatever I, I can do all that and while there's things that we can do to have a little bit of reassurance isn't a bad thing, yeah, you're on the right track.
• 39:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Or maybe you should think about this or that.
• 39:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Again, we're just accumulating information and at the time we need to, we make the best decision we can at that time.
• 39:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Autism, whatever that, whatever those challenges are, those disabilities are if you're given the opportunity, take it Because, like me, I was given an opportunity.
• 40:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: No, I was given two choices.
• 40:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: After multiple emergency room visits in November 2017, I was given two choices.
• 40:44
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: One was continue on living in fear and panic and not sure if I would still be here once I left the hospital or do what I didn't want to do.
• 41:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I didn't want to be admitted to a psych ward.
• 41:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I didn't want to do.
• 41:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I didn't want to be admitted to a psych ward.
• 41:10
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I didn't want to be a person that some people call, oh you're going to the nut house, and all these things.
• 41:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: At that moment, it didn't matter what all those people thought, it mattered what I thought and what I needed.
• 41:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And I took it upon myself finally, finally, to ask for help, that I couldn't do everything myself.
• 41:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And that's what it is.
• 41:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And like that, medically I don't have that background, I don't.
• 42:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so when I was given that opportunity, after all those visits, all those days, all those months crying and being in fear and feel like I'm blacking out and feel like I'm allergic to eating everything except carrot sticks and plain hummus, that just that weight, those weights were just taking me to the ground.
• 42:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I couldn't carry them anymore.
• 42:35
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I couldn't carry them on my own.
• 42:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I wanted to, I tried to, but I couldn't.
• 42:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And so that's when I made a hard decision I admitted myself voluntarily, and while it was one of the lowest days of my life, it was one of the best days of my life, because I started to learn that I needed help and that I didn't care what other people thought, I didn't care what other names or judgments people would make against me, towards me, to my face or behind my back, and so that's a huge reason why I'm here today because of God and because of these medical folks, that I finally made a decision that Justin can't, I can't, fix everything, nobody can.
• 44:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So don't be a stranger, don't, don't get caught up in social media and labels and all that.
• 44:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: All that stuff's going to be there and, plus, it's not going anywhere.
• 44:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But we might be going somewhere, not in a good way.
• 44:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I just ask I've given that opportunity.
• 44:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: You don't have to keep putting ourselves on these pedestals and feel like we're unshakable.
• 45:08
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We can ask for help, because if I wasn't here, if I'm not here today, then I'm not able to help anybody.
• 45:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Then I'm not able to help anybody, and not only help somebody like yourselves or other viewers and listeners, but I'm actually helping myself too, because I'm able to share and talk through things.
• 45:45
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Some things get repeated over and over again.
• 45:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's what, at the moment, I feel I need to talk about and what I need to share about, and I have that avenue and I also have the therapist and the psychiatrist and the medication and the medication and different coping mechanisms.
• 46:11
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I have that.
• 46:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I'm lucky.
• 46:14
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I think I'm lucky because these resources are there for everybody 988 hotline call text head over to 988 lifelineorg.
• 46:34
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: They can chat.
• 46:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you're in a crisis, you know somebody.
• 46:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That is that's why we end our shows most of the times when I remember asking you to be a voice for you.
• 46:55
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's somebody in need.
• 46:57
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There may be somebody in need and we don't need to share names, we don't need to share all that, but there might just be somebody that could use a lending ear, say, yeah, I understand as much as I can, and so that's why I say here's what I'm doing, here's how I'm managing my mental health.
• 47:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Managing my mental health.
• 47:31
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It might resonate with you, it might not, but I know it's resonated with at least one person.
• 47:42
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There's probably a whole lot more that I don't know about and I'm okay with that.
• 47:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I just want to be a light where there is none, or the light is just barely flickering, or the light needs, the light bulb needs changed out.
• 48:04
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's a Voices, for Voices is about it's being a light, it's helping, it's being transparent.
• 48:21
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's talking about real issues, real topics that not a lot of people want to talk about, and I'm okay with that.
• 48:29
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But that's the only way I know how to help.
• 48:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That's the only way I know how to share and alert people, the general public and, depending on what the topic is and I know there's a lot of people hurting out there I'm one of those but just know that you are not alone.
• 49:05
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There is help.
• 49:07
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: There are people that genuinely care.
• 49:13
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you've had a bad experience with a therapist, talk to another one.
• 49:18
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If you have a bad experience, talk to another one.
• 49:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Find one that clicks with you, that understands you.
• 49:26
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Find one that clicks with you, that understands you.
• 49:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Don't give up on yourself.
• 49:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're mighty, we're strong, we're loved.
• 49:39
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I love you, I love you, I love myself, and you can love yourself too.
• 50:00
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So I want to wish everybody here in the United States a safe, happy 4th of July, independence Day.
• 50:12
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: And if the sounds of fireworks explosions bother you, find a way to.
• 50:22
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Maybe it's listening to music, maybe it's watching a movie, I don't know.
• 50:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: But don't be afraid.
• 50:37
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Don't feel like you're alone.
• 50:41
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Don't feel like nobody understands you, because guess who's been there?
• 50:47
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: This person right here that's talking.
• 50:49
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Nobody understands you Because guess who's been there, this person right here.
• 50:51
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: It's talking, and I had to give up my ego, my pride, before I could ever get to this point to be sharing as much as I do and as much as we do and to talk about as the topics we talk about, because I like to think of it.
• 51:23
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: If I don't talk about it and nobody else is talking about it, then there's a lot of people that we're letting down and I'm letting down and I want to help.
• 51:36
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: I want to help those 3 billion people over the course of my lifetime and beyond, and the only way to do that is to do it.
• 51:48
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: That takes exposing some nefarious activity, putting people in danger, or just saying you're not alone, I'm not alone, none of us are alone.
• 52:09
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Care less about what others think and care more about what you think.
• 52:20
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So thank you so much for tuning into this episode.
• 52:27
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We're grateful, we're humbled to have this be episode number 267.
• 52:33
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Have a great day, have a great evening.
• 52:38
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: We value you, we believe in you, we love you and we are not alone Not a one of us.
• 52:50
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: So we'll see you on the next show.
• 52:53
  Voices for Voices, Justin Alan Hayes: Bye for now.