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Transcript

We've Been Dating Wrong · We Talk Back

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: talk back.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: What's up, y'all? Thank you for tuning in for a
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: new episode of We.
• 0:13
  Speaker 3: What? What?
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: You need something warm on your throat.
• 0:16
  Speaker 3: Ain't nothing I can do. Ain't nothing I can do.
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: It's 9-0-8. This is the voice they gonna get. Okay. Everybody,
• 0:24
  Speaker 3: it's me, AJ Holiday.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: Thank you for tuning in.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: Bitch, that's your regular voice, granny. miss helen i was
• 0:33
  Speaker 3: just talking about talking about your voice uh my girl
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: scouts lady her name was miss helen y'all sound exactly
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: alike miss helen i'm gonna call you miss helen going
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: for it bitch don't do that hey y'all tell me
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: talk about my morning voice she got me up early
• 0:52
  Speaker 3: as fuck so here we are okay So thank you
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: guys for tuning in for a new episode of We
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: Talk Back, a show dedicated to you niggas and these hoes.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: It's your co-host AJ Holiday. I say good morning to you.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Y'all, this bitch, it's nine o'clock, y'all. This bitch talking
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: about it's early as fuck.
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: I don't be talking this early in the morning. I
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: be up, but I don't be talking. You know how
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: that go. She got me up early as fuck. It's
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: all nine o'clock. About to be lunch in a little while.
• 1:25
  Speaker 3: I had a damn frog in the.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: Throat, man. Hey, y'all. It's me, Tam Bam. I love y'all.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Thank y'all for tuning in again. AJ, thank you for
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: joining me so early in the morning.
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: Whatever. How was your weekend? How was our weekend, bitch?
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: What you mean? We was together. I know.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: We was together again.
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: The last couple weekends.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: Y'all, we went to see, it was Dave Chappelle and
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Chris Rock and Donnell Rollins. Niggas was so funny. It
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: was so hilarious. I wish I could have recorded it
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: by my phone, but they took my phone and made
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: us put it in a little case that was locked
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: so I couldn't record the footage because I swear I
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: probably would have recorded the whole show and posted it
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: to my social media.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: Right. The funniest part is when Donnell Rollins, that nigga
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: was like, and I had just said this shit. I
• 2:13
  Speaker 3: leaned over to my homegirl. I was like, um, shit,
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: everybody phone lock up. Now this nigga be talking hella shit.
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: Soon as I said that shit, that nigga say, yeah,
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: y'all crackers.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: Phone locked up.
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: Cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: He started fucking cutting up.
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: He said some other words. Yes. He was definitely cutting up.
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: I love them guys.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: He was saying a lot of shit. Yeah, everybody was funny.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: I can't, it's smart to make us lock our phones
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: because I can't remember not a single joke. That I
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: laughed at. I know I was like holding my gut laughing,
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: but I can't remember nothing them niggas said. Me either.
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: I couldn't retell they joke right now for you at all.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: But just know that Chris Rock went in on Will Smith.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: Oh my goodness. He did about 25 minutes. If y'all
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: have an opportunity and you see this tour coming through
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: your city, you probably should.
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: Go check it out.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: Charleston was the last stop. It was only a five
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: show tour.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: Oh, never mind.
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: Y'all got to catch it on, I don't know, HBO
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: Max or some shit.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: They was recording it, so it's probably going to become
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: available to you soon.
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah. That was a good weekend. I literally was outside
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: from Thursday to Sunday. My body is going through something, bitch.
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: It wasn't even karaoke night. I was grabbing the mic
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: in them people club. Every time I go to the club,
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: I'm like, man, let me get the mic. This is
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: why I travel with one, because motherfuckers be stingy with
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: the mic.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: I don't care that you DJing.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: Sunday, my best friend had her gender reveal for my
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: new guy baby. And it's a boy, y'all. So I
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: put a little baby. If y'all come to my Instagram,
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: y'all see that picture. Just put a little baby, a
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: blue baby. Not a blue baby. A blue heart and
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: a baby in there. Show me some love for my
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: new guy baby. This probably might be closest I get
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: to having babies, I think. So I'm grateful for them.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: I'm grateful for her. So that was my Sunday. Oh, no, no, no.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: That's not all. Then after the gender reveal, we went
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: to see Oots. Oots had a comedy show. I don't
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: know if y'all are familiar with him. He's really funny.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: Went to see him in Charlotte. And he's done quite
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: a few things. So y'all look for him.
• 4:18
  Speaker 3: My boy, Oots.
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: That was my weekend.
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: Let's get into stupid internet news.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: What is the sins of this past week?
• 4:25
  Speaker 3: Well, the biggest sin, the unfortunate... you know, passing of
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: Tyree Nichols. The incident actually took place on January the 7th,
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: I believe, but he actually passed away.
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: On January the 10th.
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: And since then, there's been five officers arrested, and I
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: think they're contemplating arresting a sixth officer. The five black
• 4:52
  Speaker 3: officers arrested essentially for the lynching of Tyree Nichols. I
• 4:59
  Speaker 3: don't know what they thought the outcome was going to be.
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: I didn't watch the video. Did you?
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: No, I don't. I don't like to consume things of
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: that nature.
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: No, it's not a movie. This is a real person.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: I don't want to see that.
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: And I'm blocking anybody that sends that shit to my
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: phone or Instagram.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: I swear for God.
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: I don't block you, but I'll let you know. Like,
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: that's just not my particular aesthetic that I like to consume.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: So please don't send me that because. I'll carry it
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: with me forever, so I can't handle it.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: So police on Friday, this past Friday.
• 5:34
  Speaker 3: Released more than an hour worth of footage showing the
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: deadly confrontation on January the 7th between 29-year-old Tyree Nichols
• 5:44
  Speaker 3: and the officers of Memphis Police Department. He died three
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: days later after just a normal traffic stop that turned
• 5:52
  Speaker 3: into a homicide, essentially. And to me, it took no
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: time for these guys to be arrested, lose their jobs,
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: all that shit. Whereas we have to march through the
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: streets when it's a white officer and a black victim.
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: But this is two birds, one stone at this point.
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: I find it kind of awkward that five, excuse me,
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: four of the five officers are Q-dogs. So the thing is,
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: is that you ever heard of mob mentality?
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: Like it only takes one out the bunch to activate
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: the others. So like just think of a pack of wolves.
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: They have a leader. So when the leader does something,
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: it's like something happens in the rest of these.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: It's triggering.
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: Yes. So it's not like somebody has to even verbally say, hey,
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: beat his ass. It's like some type of, I don't know, possession, essentially.
• 6:46
  Speaker 3: Because what would possess y'all? to do this horrific crime
• 6:50
  Speaker 3: to another black man.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: To your brother. To your brother. And that's the thing,
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: because there's a Tyree Nichols in every neighborhood every day.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: When are we going to start seeing each other as,
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: see you as my brother, see you as my sister?
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: What happened?
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: And there was a white officer on site, so were
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: y'all showing off for him?
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: And, you know, they locked him up fast, but I'm
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: okay with that. I'm not okay with them not locking
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: up the white officers quickly. Do the same. Keep that
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: same energy. But y'all beat the dog shit out of
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: your brother on the street to death. Lock him up.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: So each was charged with one count of second-degree murder,
• 7:33
  Speaker 3: two counts of official misconduct, one count of official oppression,
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: one count of aggravated assault while acting in concert, And
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: two counts of aggravated kidnapping and the death of Nichols,
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: according to Shelby County Sheriff's Sheriff's Office. So he tried
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: to run like your body is going to kick into
• 7:55
  Speaker 3: fight or flight. Right. You physically one black man, 145 pounds,
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: six foot cannot beat these big football player looking dudes.
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: It's impossible. So he ran. And you can hear them.
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: I did hear some of the audio saying, don't make
• 8:11
  Speaker 3: us chase you. So y'all mad y'all had to do
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: some physical activity on the job? I don't understand. And
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: then so now, the next thing that pissed me off
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: involving this case is Jason Whitlock. He's a media commentator.
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: He used to work for Fox Sports, MSNBC, I believe, also.
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: Black man. Okay? That's all. So... The things that he
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: had to say about this case and black women, because
• 8:39
  Speaker 3: for whatever reason, this day and time, we get blamed
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: for every fucking thing. So the disparaging things he had
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: to say about black women, like, I wish I could
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: smack his ass.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: I swear to God.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: His face or his ass?
• 8:55
  Speaker 3: I'd probably shoot him in the ass.
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: How about that?
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Don't shoot. See, that's the problem. Black on black violence
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: is the problem that we're talking about right now. No violence.
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: We just need to educate each other. Listen, violence is
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: necessary sometimes. You know what I'm saying? Violence is necessary sometimes.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: A lot of times change don't come without violence. Unfortunately,
• 9:17
  Speaker 3: on this realm, it's necessary sometimes. I don't think that
• 9:22
  Speaker 3: people should be able to say and do what the
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: fuck they want to do. Period.
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: There has to be law and order.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: Right, I agree.
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: And as a black man to publicly disparage black women,
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: I'm sick and tired of that shit. I'm sick and
• 9:33
  Speaker 3: tired of it. So he was like, there's a racial
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: element in this story about young black men and their
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: inability to treat each other in a humane way.
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: I agree with.
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: Everybody involved in this on the street level was either
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: 24 to 32 years old. Everybody.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: It was a group of.
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: Young black men, five on one, looked like gang violence
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: to me. I can agree. Yeah, it did.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: From what I saw.
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: So he goes on to say, it looked like what
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: young black men do when they're supervised by single black women.
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: And that's what they got going on in Memphis, in
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: the Memphis Police Department. They've elected some or put some
• 10:14
  Speaker 3: black woman in charge of the police force.
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: And we're getting the same kind of chaos.
• 10:19
  Speaker 3: And disunity and violence that we see in a lot
• 10:22
  Speaker 3: of our cities ran by single mothers.
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: Black man, black man, black man.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: That is so unfair. That is so unfair to put
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: all of this on black single mothers. Wow. Because we
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: make ourselves single mothers.
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: You know, black men are literally out here creating single mothers.
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: And I'm not going to say all, because I'm coming
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: to find that there's a lot of black men that.
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: Don't have children. So.
• 10:46
  Speaker 3: It may be that women are having children with men
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: who already have children. Right? Because there are a lot
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: of single black men who don't have kids. But to
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: put the onus on black women alone as if we're
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: making ourselves baby mamas. I understand baby mama culture is
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: a nasty thing. And it's something that's almost damn near
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: celebrated in the black community. I wish it would be abolished.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: But we are having these children by ourselves.
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: Like, women... are choosing to stay in the homes. Men
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: make the choice to leave the homes. It's not the women.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: I don't even think the women have much of a choice.
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: Yes, mama, baby, daddy, maybe.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: Right, what they gonna do?
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so Ciara took to Twitter and she added him.
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: It says, as a black man to get on national
• 11:38
  Speaker 3: TV and say something like this is irresponsible. A lot
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: of amazing kids have come from single mothers. For you
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: to also undermine single black women in the midst of
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: a tragedy is so sad. This woman just lost her son.
• 11:51
  Speaker 3: Do better.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: He responds to Sierra. Jason Whitlock responds to Sierra and says,
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: appreciate the feedback, Sierra.
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: But at some point, we are going to have to
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: deal with the negative impact of baby mama culture. It's
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: destructive and unsustainable. Come up out of denial. Denial won't
• 12:08
  Speaker 3: fix the problem.
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: Thanks.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: But first of all, how do you know that these
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: men come from single mothers? You don't know.
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: Exactly.
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: He's literally talking about the chief of police being a woman.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 12:19
  Speaker 3: That's what he's saying, essentially. You don't know these people's backgrounds.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: If they're cute dogs.
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: They went to college, okay? Right. They're college educated black
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: men who still chose to do this stupid shit.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: You don't know what type of household they came from.
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: And that's the woman who runs the police force is
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: not their mother. That's not their mama. She's doing a job.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: And that doesn't make her incapable because she is a woman.
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: That's what it sounds like to me. As if this
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: shit doesn't happen under the watch of black men, white men.
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: Or white men or anybody. Like, what are you talking about?
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's ignorant.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's very ignorant.
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: I just wish that if you don't have anything encouraging
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: to say, stay the fuck off TV.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: And then you having this conversation in mixed company is
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: wild to me.
• 13:06
  Speaker 3: It sends a message like everything bad in the black community,
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: blame black women. Right. And I feel like we get
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: blamed for the majority of the things that happen in
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: our community. And some of the stuff I can agree
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: with because women do set the standard. And you have
• 13:21
  Speaker 3: children out here being raised by the unraised. it still
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: boils down to just broken families. Where are the black men?
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: Where are the black men? And y'all supposed to be
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: the leaders? Where y'all at? Why y'all ain't staying at
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: your homes and leading your family?
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: Leading your woman, leading your children. You make a choice
• 13:42
  Speaker 3: to leave and now it's still mama's fault. And I
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: feel like a lot of that shit even plays out
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: in relationships between black men and women, like intimate relationships.
• 13:51
  Speaker 3: You got all this, um, All this disdain for your
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: mama because your daddy made a choice to leave.
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: You don't even realize that the real problem is with
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: your daddy.
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: It's not even with your mom. Right. Your mama was
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: there and she did the best she could, oftentimes with
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: multiple children. And she could have been married and ended
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: up a single mom. That's my mom story.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: Right. Mine too. Mine too.
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: So it's no accountability for black men. No account. I,
• 14:22
  Speaker 3: I never hear accountability come from them.
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: Not.
• 14:24
  Speaker 3: And I know for a fact that black women do
• 14:26
  Speaker 3: have a problem accepting accountability. I know that I'm a
• 14:29
  Speaker 3: black woman. Okay. Right. But we are not about to
• 14:32
  Speaker 3: put the issues of our entire community on black women.
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: That is fucking disgusting. You know, they told us to
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: hate the man, hate the white man. And somehow now
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: black women are the white man.
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: I want to do episode on that.
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: Are we the black?
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: Are we the white man now?
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: Um, I ain't no white man.
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: Me? Definitely not. But in their eyes, it's like we're
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: being put up on a pedestal above them and all
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: this other shit. And I mean, it's a certain demographic
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: of black men who think this way. I'm not saying
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: it's all of them, but it's a good bit.
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: We need to get one of them on so we
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: can have the conversation, the necessary conversation.
• 15:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I would love to.
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: I would love to do that.
• 15:13
  Speaker 3: And hopefully it wouldn't turn into an argument. I think
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: I can have a conversation about that shit. I get
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: real personal about black women. Real personal.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: Because I'm a black woman.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: Because we are one. Yeah. We are and they are us.
• 15:27
  Speaker 3: I just want to send my condolences to the family
• 15:30
  Speaker 3: of Tyree Nichols, man.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: This shit is disgusting.
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: Moving on. This next story is just something I agree with.
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: So the Surgeon General, U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy. Says
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: he believes 13 is too young for children to be
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: on social media platforms because all those sites allow children
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: of that age to join. Kids are still developing their identities.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: I agree.
• 16:01
  Speaker 3: So I know like Twitter, TikTok especially, that was a
• 16:04
  Speaker 3: kid's app initially. Somehow adults got their ass up on
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: there and turned it out a little bit. TikTok is
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: supposed to be banned soon, I believe, also in the U.S.
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: because it is a Chinese-ran application.
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think 13 is, he says not until 13.
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: No, he says it's too early. He said parents need
• 16:25
  Speaker 3: to get together and decide what's the best age for
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: their children.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: 16, 17, 18.
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: He doesn't know what the age is, but he's just
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: saying that 13, which is the age that most of
• 16:34
  Speaker 3: these platforms allow people to join, is just too young.
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I can agree with that just because it's almost
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: impossible to monitor what they're consuming, you know?
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. And he says he's based this off of
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: data he's actually seen. And 13 is just too early
• 16:51
  Speaker 3: because these kids are having like identity crisis. And then also,
• 16:55
  Speaker 3: if you feeling just a little bit like a boy
• 16:58
  Speaker 3: or a little bit like a girl, like, you know
• 16:59
  Speaker 3: what I'm saying? Like you have all these different outlets
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: online to help, you know, sway. Yeah. Push those those
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: thought processes. And it's fucking dangerous because it's adults who
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: probably have mental health issues who are on these apps.
• 17:16
  Speaker 3: soliciting the kids.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: In all different facets not just like your sexuality but
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: you know a lot of different things so I agree
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: with that 13 is rather young but I mean it's
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: up to the parents to rear your children.
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: And regulate what they're watching like is it too early
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: for a 13 year old to have a cell phone
• 17:38
  Speaker 3: I would say not you know because you know your
• 17:40
  Speaker 3: kids are going to school and shit like that I
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: feel like if we you know back when we were
• 17:43
  Speaker 3: in school If we could have a cell phone, our
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: parents probably would have had us one because shit is
• 17:48
  Speaker 3: getting way more dangerous out here now than anyway. So
• 17:53
  Speaker 3: you need to be able to contact your kids. Things
• 17:55
  Speaker 3: are happening at schools, shootings, and all that type of
• 17:57
  Speaker 3: crazy shit. Your kids need a cell phone. But I
• 18:01
  Speaker 3: know they have the parental guide stuff on phones where
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: you could block certain apps, block certain websites. I think
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: parents need to be knowledgeable and implement those things. If
• 18:12
  Speaker 3: you're paying a bill... who would fuck arguing with a
• 18:14
  Speaker 3: 13-year-old about an app?
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: But here's the thing. I feel like oftentimes, and y'all
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: might get mad at me as parents, I'm not a parent,
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: but I see a lot of parents letting social media
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: raise their kids because they don't want to be bothered
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: with them. When they come in, get your tablet. Go
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: get your tablet. Didn't I buy you a tablet? Go
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: get it. And that's their way of not having to
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: deal with their ass.
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: That's a problem.
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're not really an active parent.
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 18:43
  Speaker 3: I think kids should have a certain amount of time.
• 18:45
  Speaker 3: They have access to electronics and social media and shit
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: like that, like maybe an hour or two a day.
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: You have to monitor as a parent.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: Kids are going to do what they want to do,
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: but you have to have some type of guidance skill.
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: Ain't no way you just let your kid run amok
• 19:03
  Speaker 3: like that because you don't feel like dealing with them. Oh,
• 19:05
  Speaker 3: there's a lot of dads on there. See the McDonald's.
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: McDonald's every day.
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: Where your tablet at?
• 19:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree with the Surgeon General, though. I just
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: want to talk about that briefly.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: I'm scared of what the world is going to be
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: like when we're elderly, you know?
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: Well, I know we're going to be some broke back,
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: tatted up, fake booty, fake titty bitches in church.
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: Sexy tattoos on your neck. That's fine. But will the
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: kids care for us and respect us? Probably not.
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: It depends on how you raise your kid.
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: Probably not. You better have some money in the bank.
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: Tell me what you think.
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: They already beating the fuck out of their teachers now.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: you know did.
• 19:46
  Speaker 3: You see that video it was a black girl she
• 19:50
  Speaker 3: basically attacked her teacher and looks like the teacher was
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: trying to call for help on the cell phone she
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: knocks the cell phone out the teacher's hand then like
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: they end up at the door she's trying to push
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: the teacher out the door and close the door and
• 20:02
  Speaker 3: the teacher's like stop putting your hands on me see
• 20:05
  Speaker 3: me personally I would clean every classroom with that little
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: girl ass Mm-hmm. There's no way. You know, like parents,
• 20:12
  Speaker 3: y'all sending out kids to school and they're terrorizing the
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: fucking teachers. Right.
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: No home training. No. No respect.
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: And then you come up there and you get mad
• 20:21
  Speaker 3: with the teacher, too. And know damn well you be
• 20:23
  Speaker 3: having to beat her ass at home, too. But you
• 20:25
  Speaker 3: mad because another adult outside of you put their hands
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: on her.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: Trying to teach her some respect.
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm trying to figure out, like, how do you
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: get to that point? How do you get that fucking
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: mad that you attack a teacher?
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: That you have no respect for authority or adults.
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: You know, I would love... I want to build a school.
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: I was thinking about prisons, hospitals, schools. They all look alike.
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: What if you had a glass dome with a lot
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: of greenery, a lot of sunlight, so kids can actually grow?
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying? Right. You're in school all day.
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: You come out at sundown and they're going... Like, kids
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: are not even getting the vitamin D, the sunlight they
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: need to just grow properly. It's depression. Then you got
• 21:13
  Speaker 3: to throw social media on top of that and throw
• 21:15
  Speaker 3: McDonald's on top of that. Anyway, dealing with a lot
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: of social issues, y'all. We're done. No, we're not. We're
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: going to be good. It's just going to get bad
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: before it get better. Oh, goodness, Lord. I don't know.
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: Bless us. Take care of us. That's all I can say.
• 21:30
  Speaker 3: So last week, we talked about breaking up. This week,
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: we want to get into dating. Like, how do you
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: actually date? What's the process of dating? Is there a
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: process for dating? Is there some extra steps? That we
• 21:44
  Speaker 3: ain't doing?
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: Situationships?
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: All that shit? We'll see. We'll talk about it when
• 21:49
  Speaker 3: we come back from this break. All right, so we're back. So, Tam,
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: what's your definition of dating?
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: My definition of dating... Hmm. It's going out with someone
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: with the intention of getting to know them in a
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: more intimate way and potentially fucking after the third date.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: I don't know, bitch.
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: That sounds about right. You know, I think we skip
• 22:28
  Speaker 3: some steps sometimes, though. So the Cambridge Dictionary definition says,
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: says to regularly spend time with someone you have a
• 22:38
  Speaker 3: romantic relationship with. When people say they're dating, a lot
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: of times, I would think you're dating more than one person, right?
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: So do you have a romantic relationship with multiple people?
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: I think that's like the general definition, but is that
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: really what we believe dating is?
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: Well, romance doesn't have to be physical.
• 22:56
  Speaker 3: You're right.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: It could be platonic, I guess.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: No, no, it doesn't even have to be platonic, but
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: it doesn't have to be like, Romance doesn't have to
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: be like we have sex at the end of the night.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: Romance can be like someone taking you on a nice
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: date somewhere quiet and quaint and sexy, you know? And
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: then on Tuesday, you go to the same place with
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: a different person. That don't mean, you know, they're still dating.
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: But that doesn't mean you're sleeping with everybody. You just
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: have romantic intention, you know?
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: Look, I got a disclaimer for men that I'm dating.
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: Mm-hmm. Men oftentimes don't have like the go-to spots.
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: They don't know.
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: Women be like yelping and figuring out like places. If
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: I catch you at a place that I introduce you
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: to with another bitch, I'm flipping the table over. I'm
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: clearing it with my forearm. And if you or that
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: bitch got something to say, I'm kick sweeping y'all. Because
• 23:58
  Speaker 3: why are you in my spot? Like you own the place.
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: This is my place. You didn't know about this place.
• 24:03
  Speaker 3: This is not your place.
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: It does not belong to you.
• 24:06
  Speaker 3: You didn't even know this place existed and now you're
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: showing it off to another bitch.
• 24:10
  Speaker 2: I'm mad.
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: And I don't even care if I'm in there with
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: another nigga. Because it's my place.
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: So you can take all the niggas there, but I
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: can't take nobody else?
• 24:20
  Speaker 3: I take all my niggas to Pearl's Oyster Bar. I
• 24:25
  Speaker 3: love Pearl's. Not all my niggas. Only a couple people
• 24:28
  Speaker 3: I've been there with, but That's like my go-to spot,
• 24:31
  Speaker 3: even with friends in town and shit like that.
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: I love Pearl's Oyster Bar.
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: So if I catch you there with somebody else sitting
• 24:36
  Speaker 3: at my goddamn bar, like walk on the bar.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: You don't own the bar. You don't own the bar.
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: You don't own the restaurant.
• 24:42
  Speaker 3: Bitch, I'm Pearl.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: I get.
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: I'm Pearl.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: I get what you're saying, but you don't have that
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: right at all. I do. I don't have a spot.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: When I was living in Columbia, South Carolina, I used
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: to have a spot that I would take everybody. I
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: don't have that in Charlotte. I don't have that type
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: of space. I guess Capitol Grill, if I had to
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: pick one. But they kind of falling off lately, honestly.
• 25:14
  Speaker 3: That food isn't good to me.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: It used to be.
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: They have a great, dirty martini.
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah. I don't know what to eat.
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: From there, for real. Some oysters.
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: And fish, they got fish, but it's not that good.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: I'll go on like maybe two dates in a week
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: with different people.
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: Are you having sex in any one of them?
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: No.
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Are you sexually active right now, Tam?
• 25:41
  Speaker 3: No.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: Not for 2023. Not yet. It's only January, you know. Oh,
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: it's about to be February. I haven't found nobody yet.
• 25:52
  Speaker 3: I want somebody. Really?
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: I know, Valentine's Day coming, I ain't got no nigga.
• 25:58
  Speaker 3: Right. I wasn't supposed to be active this year, but
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: something happened anyway.
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: Well, that was like at the beginning of the year,
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: you told us.
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: Right, and yeah.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: It kept happening? Mm-hmm.
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: I already don't have sex that crazy, not that often anyway,
• 26:17
  Speaker 3: so it's still like at a minimum, essentially.
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: Is first date sex okay? Okay.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: I have had sex one time first date.
• 26:28
  Speaker 3: Mm-hmm. Two times. Like, that I can really remember. No, twice.
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: And I'm still, like, good friends, you know, like, cool
• 26:36
  Speaker 3: with the people. So it's not like it was, like,
• 26:39
  Speaker 3: a real, like, one-night stand. I don't think I've ever had...
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: I've never had a one-night stand before. Have you?
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm.
• 26:46
  Speaker 3: Like, just fuck on a nigga and never talk to
• 26:48
  Speaker 3: them again?
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: Interesting. Tell us about it.
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: This was.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: Listen, all my whole stories come from college, y'all. All
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: of them come from way back a long time ago.
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: It was just like we had fun. I got, it
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: wasn't even a date that we were on. We met
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: at the club. I was drunk and shit happened. But
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: I was like super drunk. I probably like, he probably
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: shouldn't have even wanted to do it to me, honestly.
• 27:17
  Speaker 3: But he probably was drunk too. Like who's the onus
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: on when both parties are drunk? Like get goofy on men. Right.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: Shit, you probably was taking his clothes off.
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: I was like, just.
• 27:30
  Speaker 3: That. No, I ain't had no one night stands.
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: And he was older. He was an older guy. He
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: was in town from New York. I think he like
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: worked in like, he was like a New York trash man. Yeah.
• 27:51
  Speaker 3: Yo, what? That's a good job in New York. He
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: probably was making money.
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: He was making money. He was young, but he was
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: older than me. And he was swaggy. And he said
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: that's what he did for a living, girl. I don't
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: know what happened to that man.
• 28:09
  Speaker 3: That nigga's a city worker. He was getting that check. Okay,
• 28:11
  Speaker 3: in New York, that's the job to have.
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: City worker.
• 28:17
  Speaker 3: Not you fucking on rock.
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I couldn't.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: Have been no more than 20.
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: Every time. None of that shit count. Middle finger tall,
• 28:32
  Speaker 3: old life. Yeah. Okay.
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: That's the bullshit. Right.
• 28:35
  Speaker 3: So this article I read, it said, dating someone is
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: not considered as being in.
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: A relationship with them.
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: Like the current definition of dating, right? Dating is really
• 28:44
  Speaker 3: more of a stepping stone to get into a relationship
• 28:47
  Speaker 3: where one gets to know someone romantically.
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: Being in a relationship comes much later.
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: Where, excuse me, Being in a relationship comes much later
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: where the dating partners do not wish to date other people.
• 29:05
  Speaker 3: They have now committed to each other and intend on
• 29:08
  Speaker 3: cultivating their shared connection. I think when, and I always
• 29:13
  Speaker 3: say this, I don't think that black women, we were
• 29:16
  Speaker 3: ever like able or even taught to date. You know,
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: like your mom be like, you better get your work,
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: stop worrying about those boys. Then you go to college.
• 29:27
  Speaker 3: Worry about your career because you can't, ain't nobody going
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: to take care of you. Whereas our white counterparts, white women,
• 29:34
  Speaker 3: you know, oftentimes they meet their husbands in college and
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: they go from their daddy house to their husbands house
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: you know meanwhile black women out here buying their first
• 29:45
  Speaker 3: homes by themselves.
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: But why do you think our parents were teaching us
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: that based on their experiences and they don't want us
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: to be out here fucked up you know there is
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: a culture of us ending up by ourselves, you know?
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: So mama's just preparing us for the harsh reality that
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: that could possibly, potentially happen to us.
• 30:07
  Speaker 3: Be able to take care of yourself. That's what my
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: mom ever said. And this even goes back to the
• 30:12
  Speaker 3: Jason Whitlock guy. Man, black women have been conditioned, like,
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: we gotta survive. What would y'all have us do? You
• 30:21
  Speaker 3: talk shit when we in the projects. You talk shit
• 30:24
  Speaker 3: when we're in the corporate setting. You talk shit when
• 30:27
  Speaker 3: we're the chief of police. Like, when is enough enough
• 30:31
  Speaker 3: for black women?
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: And you talk shit when we waiting on a nigga
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: to take care of us.
• 30:35
  Speaker 3: Exactly. But it's okay for any other group of women.
• 30:39
  Speaker 3: It's okay for any other group of women to depend
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: on their men.
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: And they're actually taught that.
• 30:46
  Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying? And if they can't depend
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: on the man they're with, they still can at least
• 30:49
  Speaker 3: depend on their daddies.
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: A lot of us don't even have that.
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: Right. The next part of this thing, it says the
• 30:54
  Speaker 3: exhausting part of this, however, is the stage where one
• 30:58
  Speaker 3: does not know what is going on and is not
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: sure when or how to ask. And I think a
• 31:04
  Speaker 3: lot of women end up in limbo in this little purgatory, essentially.
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: What are we?
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah. It says, first, it's very difficult to find someone
• 31:16
  Speaker 3: you actually like and are attracted to. And then if
• 31:19
  Speaker 3: you've been on a few great dates, you don't know
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: how or if you're exclusively dating each other. Often when
• 31:26
  Speaker 3: one partner does bring up the fact that they are
• 31:30
  Speaker 3: not dating other people while dating each other, they are
• 31:33
  Speaker 3: met with an unexpected reaction. Like, oh, I didn't know
• 31:37
  Speaker 3: we were supposed to be exclusive or something. I think
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: it's too soon to go to that direction or even worse,
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: getting ghosted. I feel like that's why a lot of
• 31:46
  Speaker 3: women don't even ask or they don't feel comfortable enough
• 31:50
  Speaker 3: asking a man, like, what's next?
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: Where are we?
• 31:54
  Speaker 3: Having like a temperature check of the relationship because here
• 31:57
  Speaker 3: we are, we've dated, right? Third, three, four dates, might
• 32:00
  Speaker 3: start having sex. And every man you date isn't your husband.
• 32:05
  Speaker 3: I think that women oftentimes fantasize about men immediately. Like, damn,
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: I could see myself being with him.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: Especially after a certain age.
• 32:13
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: Because we're dating with intention, you know, typically for husbands
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: after a certain age. I think most of us anyway. Yeah.
• 32:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah. And I want to get into what is dating
• 32:24
  Speaker 3: with intention also. Because I think like that's the new thing,
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: dating with intention. But do we really even know what
• 32:31
  Speaker 3: that is? Because oftentimes you got to be honest with yourself.
• 32:34
  Speaker 3: Do you even want a relationship for real? Because the
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: right guy that you thought you wanted may very well
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: come along and you'll pass up on him because really
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: you aren't ready for him.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's me. Well, I feel like I'm more ready now,
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: but during pandemic, I just didn't want to be in
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: the house by myself.
• 32:54
  Speaker 3: A lot of people ended up in relationships or ended
• 32:58
  Speaker 3: relationships in the pandemic. I think if you were in
• 33:01
  Speaker 3: a relationship and you made it through, Y'all supposed to
• 33:03
  Speaker 3: be together.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, y'all solid. Y'all solid than the motherfuckers y'all lasting through.
• 33:16
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: So how do you generally meet men, Tam?
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: I meet a lot of men on social media.
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: Okay, so social media.
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: So my DM box be quaking. But here's the thing.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: But it's hard to, you know, filter through those people, honestly. So, yeah,
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: I have trouble with that. Because a lot of, oftentimes,
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: it feels like everybody's just the same robot, right? With
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: a face, with an avatar.
• 33:46
  Speaker 3: Right. I prefer to meet people in, like, social circles
• 33:50
  Speaker 3: or social, like, settings. Me too. Like, out.
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: That's better to me. Because you really get to experience them,
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: even just a little bit, versus social media.
• 33:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: Social media, everybody's presented themselves like a resume, you know?
• 34:03
  Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: They only got their highlight reel up. You know, all
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: you see is the best of what they got to offer.
• 34:09
  Speaker 3: Exactly. Right.
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: And it don't even be real half the time, you know? Like,
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: they'll have a picture of a room and it look nice,
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: but if you were to actually walk in that room,
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: that motherfucker is dirty as hell. The only spot that's
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: clean is the spot where they taking that picture at.
• 34:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah. No headboard, flat pillows. This you? This where you
• 34:30
  Speaker 3: live at?
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: So I prefer organic interaction, honestly.
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, me too.
• 34:38
  Speaker 3: I've never really gotten into the online dating. I met
• 34:41
  Speaker 3: one man on online dating. We're still friends to this day.
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: When I first moved to St. Louis, I intentionally got
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: on pieces of fish. Either it was Pieces of Fish
• 34:52
  Speaker 3: or Bumble.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: That's not what it's called.
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: I know, but it's a fucking feeding frenzy on plenty
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: of fish. You know what I'm saying? It's a feeding frenzy.
• 34:59
  Speaker 3: It's like most of those guys are on there looking
• 35:01
  Speaker 3: for somebody just to smash. They're not really looking for relationships.
• 35:05
  Speaker 3: But I've actually known a couple people who ended up
• 35:07
  Speaker 3: in relationships off of dating apps. Plenty of fish. Bumble.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: I have a homegirl who got married.
• 35:13
  Speaker 3: Off of Bumble. Hinge.
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Hinge. I'm trying to get on Rhea.
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: Right. Me too, bitch. I've been trying to get on
• 35:20
  Speaker 3: Rhea for two years.
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: They won't let me on that motherfucker.
• 35:23
  Speaker 3: I don't think it's for us anyway. Not the black girls.
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: So the five steps online, the five steps to dating,
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: pretty general. Okay. So there's the initial attraction. What attracts
• 35:39
  Speaker 3: you to a man? Like what's your initial like attraction
• 35:43
  Speaker 3: to a guy? Teeth.
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 35:45
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: Bitch I'm a big smile yes I'm a big teeth
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: person I was telling one of our mutual friends I
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: won't say their name I was like bruh if you
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: just go fix your teeth your pussy stock is gonna
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: go up way up you gotta go fix it right
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: but everybody don't care about that.
• 36:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah I think teeth is like definitely top of my
• 36:08
  Speaker 3: list because um and I mean they could just be
• 36:10
  Speaker 3: fucked up teeth that doesn't mean your mouth is nasty
• 36:13
  Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying But I think as adults,
• 36:16
  Speaker 3: we should definitely be taking care of our teeth with
• 36:19
  Speaker 3: everybody out here getting. I'm not saying for you to
• 36:21
  Speaker 3: go get veneers and nothing like take care of your
• 36:23
  Speaker 3: current teeth. Like I'll get veneers when these ones drop out.
• 36:27
  Speaker 3: Like motherfuckers, these. If me and Tam don't got shit else,
• 36:30
  Speaker 3: we got fucking perfect teeth. Right.
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: Out this bitch. I'm on my way to the motherfucking
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: dead as soon as we finish recording. That's why we
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: had to get up and do it so early. It's
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: just important.
• 36:43
  Speaker 3: Yes like so teeth um for me uh physique I
• 36:51
  Speaker 3: like bodies it don't have to be like a muscle
• 36:53
  Speaker 3: up body but I like nice looking fit looking men
• 36:59
  Speaker 3: is what I like I like backs I like backs.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: They ain't gotta be my niggas ain't gotta be fit
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: just you gotta be clean smell good.
• 37:08
  Speaker 3: And dress nice a nice watch You can have a
• 37:11
  Speaker 3: little belly.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: I'm okay with that, baby. I rub all over that
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: little gut.
• 37:16
  Speaker 3: Little fupa. Little man fupa.
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't mind.
• 37:20
  Speaker 3: It got to be a dope boy belly. It can't
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: just be like a nigga with a big belly and hips.
• 37:25
  Speaker 3: Come on, man.
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 37:27
  Speaker 3: You got to be fat to fuck up.
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't like too fat, but a little extra cushion,
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: that's okay. I don't care about that.
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: I like beards.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: I love a beard. Yes.
• 37:40
  Speaker 3: I went through just looking at men that I've actually
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: dated and shit. Everybody got a fucking beard down there.
• 37:47
  Speaker 3: I love a beard.
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: I love a beard. So a nice manicured beard.
• 37:52
  Speaker 3: Smells good.
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: I don't like them beards with them long strings hanging
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: off the bottom. Stop doing that. Cut that piece.
• 38:00
  Speaker 3: I don't like them fucking chin strap looking beards. Nigga,
• 38:04
  Speaker 3: if you don't let that shit grow a little bit
• 38:06
  Speaker 3: more underneath the neck, what are you doing? He trying.
• 38:10
  Speaker 3: Your barber fucking you up. I'm going to make you
• 38:14
  Speaker 3: change your barber, dog. I'm going to call him and
• 38:16
  Speaker 3: be like, listen, if you take more hair off my
• 38:17
  Speaker 3: nigga neck, we're going to fight.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: I'm pushing that hairline back. I hate when a barber
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: do that. Like, stop pushing my nigga hairline back.
• 38:25
  Speaker 3: Right. All right, so now it's the initial attraction. The
• 38:29
  Speaker 3: next comes reality. Like, now you get to know the person.
• 38:33
  Speaker 3: Aside from the looks.
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you get to see. That room was dirty. It
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: looked clean in that picture.
• 38:40
  Speaker 3: You get to see all the fucked up shit about
• 38:41
  Speaker 3: each other.
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying?
• 38:43
  Speaker 3: Like, women, oftentimes, we think, like, we don't come with bullshit.
• 38:46
  Speaker 3: We don't have nothing wrong with us.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 38:49
  Speaker 3: And, you know, we probably point shit out to men more,
• 38:52
  Speaker 3: and they just, like, either they'll just suddenly go the
• 38:54
  Speaker 3: fuck away from your ass, Or, you know, when they
• 38:57
  Speaker 3: say something to you, you feel some type of way,
• 39:00
  Speaker 3: but you have no problem telling them what their issues are.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: I snore so bad. I think I need to, like,
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: go to see somebody. Bitch, you was snoring this weekend.
• 39:08
  Speaker 3: Talk about I slept in late. I wouldn't wake up. Bitch,
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: it took me a while to go to sleep because
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: your ass was fucking snoring.
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: First of all, bitch, you was asleep before me, so
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: how is that possible?
• 39:17
  Speaker 3: But then I woke up. I woke up and I
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: couldn't go back to sleep. Yes, bitch.
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: It was loud.
• 39:22
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: I know it's a problem. I don't know what to do.
• 39:26
  Speaker 3: When I finally went to sleep, I overslept because my
• 39:29
  Speaker 3: body reset. Bitch, you snored. I never knew.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I snore.
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: I feel like all my friends snore loud.
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like a train. I'm going to get one of
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: them shits to go over my face so I sleep.
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: A little breathing math.
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: And then when I have a nigga come over, I'm
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: going to be like, you like astronauts, nigga?
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: You like Dark Vader?
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: That's what this shit about to turn into.
• 39:53
  Speaker 3: Shame.
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: Put that motherfucking ass in that shit on my face.
• 39:56
  Speaker 3: You got to go to sleep first before them goddamn snores, man.
• 39:59
  Speaker 2: That shit can get, you ain't going to be able
• 40:01
  Speaker 2: to sleep.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: I think once I drop 30 pounds, maybe the snores
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: will go away. So we're going to see.
• 40:07
  Speaker 3: I think with a lot of men, when they lose
• 40:11
  Speaker 3: that weight off their chest, like they do stop snoring.
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: Do you sleep on your back? I sleep on my stomach.
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: I can't sleep on my back.
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: I feel like you was laying on your side and
• 40:22
  Speaker 2: you was snoring like that.
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: I was on my stomach, for sure.
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: I used to be so afraid to sleep on my back,
• 40:29
  Speaker 3: but it's like the most proper way to actually sleep.
• 40:32
  Speaker 3: It used to remind me of laying in a coffin,
• 40:33
  Speaker 3: so I would avoid sleeping on my back.
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: Now I don't give a fuck about dying.
• 40:37
  Speaker 3: So I try to go to sleep on my back
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: because it is like your body's aligned. Like, who body?
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: My booty be making my back, like, it's a big
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: space in between the top of my back and my butt. Like,
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: that make it uncomfortable laying on my back.
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: But your back don't be hurting when you sleep on
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: your stomach?
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: Mine does.
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, my shit hurt right now.
• 40:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you got to probably try sleeping on your back.
• 41:00
  Speaker 3: You think it's going to be, like, uncomfortable. But what
• 41:03
  Speaker 3: I do, I set my pillows up in a certain way.
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: I would have to put a pillow in the small
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: of my back area. Yeah, try it.
• 41:10
  Speaker 1: To, like, balance it.
• 41:11
  Speaker 3: Or sleep on your side with a pillow in between
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: your legs, like pregnant ladies.
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: That keeps everything in line, too.
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: I don't see what we can do.
• 41:20
  Speaker 3: Anyway, commitment come next, y'all. Commitment is the third step
• 41:25
  Speaker 3: in dating. So now you guys have said, okay, we're
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: just going to be dating each other.
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: If it goes this way, we know like in real relationships.
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: So that's dating exclusively. Yes.
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: So dating and then dating exclusively.
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: So I went on, like, I was talking to a guy.
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: We went on, like, one real date. He didn't live
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: in my city, right? So he flew in. We went
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: on a date. It was meh. But, you know, he
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: had potential to me. So I wanted to see him again.
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: And he said that we needed to start dating exclusively
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: at that point. And I was like, uh... We've been
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: on one date. I'm not ready to date you exclusively.
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: And he was like, well, I don't want to date
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: you if you're going to be dating other people at
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: the same time. I feel like that was unfair.
• 42:19
  Speaker 3: Well, I don't think that you can date with intent
• 42:23
  Speaker 3: and dating multiple people.
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: How? Well, we just said in the beginning, the first
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: thing we said was date multiple people at one time.
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: Right, but that's just regular dating.
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: If you're actually trying to date with intent, how do
• 42:35
  Speaker 3: you date multiple people with intent?
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: I feel like that has to be done one person
• 42:39
  Speaker 2: at a time.
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: I intentionally want to decide which niggas you I want.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: I haven't decided that you're the one that I want
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: to date.
• 42:45
  Speaker 3: But he decided that you were the one.
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 42:49
  Speaker 3: You have to have a mutual agreement. You can't just
• 42:51
  Speaker 3: decide that for somebody else.
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: We went on one date. We live in a different city.
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: I can't decide I want to date you exclusively after
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: one encounter.
• 42:59
  Speaker 3: Right. And y'all, you don't know what the dick like?
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: No, not even, I don't even know what the dick
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: like yet.
• 43:08
  Speaker 3: It's too fast.
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: You're moving too fast.
• 43:12
  Speaker 3: Right. And then comes intimacy. So, you know, if we're
• 43:16
  Speaker 3: going there, the real steps, this should be when sex
• 43:19
  Speaker 3: comes in, I assume. Reality intimacy continues. And commitment all
• 43:23
  Speaker 3: go together. I don't know why that would be three
• 43:26
  Speaker 3: different steps. Because in order to get to know somebody, like, realistically,
• 43:32
  Speaker 3: you'd have to have those.
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: Intimate conversations with them. I don't know.
• 43:38
  Speaker 3: This is just a week of online dating, wikiHow.com. And
• 43:43
  Speaker 3: then engagement and then hopefully marriage is the steps. So
• 43:48
  Speaker 3: five steps to dating. Five steps.
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: I try to do like a realistic list.
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: So again, there's the initial attraction. I can agree with that.
• 44:00
  Speaker 3: Then sex. Courting, couples date, a couple dates or whatever
• 44:06
  Speaker 3: it is. But I think that sex comes too early sometimes.
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 44:13
  Speaker 3: And then that's when the lines get kind of blurred.
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: I don't like, sex don't come early for me no more.
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: Like it come real late and I think niggas get tired.
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: The right one ain't going to get tired, though. That's
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: why it's important for women to give up now. And leave,
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: because I don't give up now. And then I'll be like,
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: that's why I didn't give you nothing now, because you
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: don't have no patience.
• 44:33
  Speaker 3: But that's why it's important to make men wait, because,
• 44:35
  Speaker 3: you know, they come up with their representative first. You
• 44:38
  Speaker 3: don't meet the real nigga until after you done have,
• 44:40
  Speaker 3: you know, sex. Now it's like, oh, that's you?
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: Nigga's like, damn, you was... Fucking the trash worker on
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: the first night. Now I got to wait.
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: Fuck this shit. I'm out. Bye, niggas.
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: That was 10, 15 years ago. I'm on a different plane.
• 44:59
  Speaker 3: Right. I got higher standards now. People are allowed to change. Oh, shit.
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: So then on my list, I have situationship.
• 45:09
  Speaker 3: So you're in that stage for about a year. And
• 45:12
  Speaker 3: this is when you're like, damn, are we together? Are
• 45:15
  Speaker 3: we not together? I feel some type of way when
• 45:17
  Speaker 3: he don't call me back or don't answer the phone.
• 45:20
  Speaker 3: Like it's this gray area that can last for a
• 45:25
  Speaker 3: long time if you let it. And I think that
• 45:27
  Speaker 3: if women don't pull themselves out of that area, a
• 45:30
  Speaker 3: man will stay there as long as you let him.
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: His whole life.
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: Yes, you better learn how to use your goddamn words.
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: Masturbate before you go on your date so you won't
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: be so horny.
• 45:41
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: Seriously.
• 45:44
  Speaker 2: I don't think a lot of women are.
• 45:46
  Speaker 3: I know one of my friends, like, I remember the
• 45:48
  Speaker 3: first time she called me. She was like, bitch, I
• 45:51
  Speaker 3: bought a vibrator. Like, why ain't nobody ever tell me? Like,
• 45:55
  Speaker 3: some people just don't know that. Yeah, you could come
• 45:59
  Speaker 3: for real.
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: We could have a real orgasm. Right, and come to
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: your senses.
• 46:03
  Speaker 2: Exactly. And go on your date and have a good night. Like,
• 46:05
  Speaker 2: and you're not, you know, hot and bothered.
• 46:07
  Speaker 3: The whole time. I feel like I have still been
• 46:10
  Speaker 3: hot and bothered. If I want to fuck you, I
• 46:12
  Speaker 3: want to fuck you. I don't give a damn if
• 46:13
  Speaker 3: I just played with my pussy before I came out
• 46:15
  Speaker 3: the house.
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: You was just a hoe though, so it's different.
• 46:18
  Speaker 3: I'm not a hoe, girl.
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: I'm just joking.
• 46:21
  Speaker 3: I'm just joking. I haven't been a hoe in over
• 46:23
  Speaker 3: two decades. The fuck?
• 46:27
  Speaker 2: A decade and a half. I'm exaggerating with that over two.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: By the decade and a half, you ain't even old
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: enough to not have been a hoe two decades. If
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: you went to college, you a hoe.
• 46:36
  Speaker 3: All right, so after the situation shit for a while,
• 46:42
  Speaker 3: then you may get to commitment, right?
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: Even if somebody's still cheating, that's your man now.
• 46:47
  Speaker 3: That's your woman now. People may still be doing a
• 46:50
  Speaker 3: little whatever.
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: But what does that look like? Because- Do you have
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: a conversation like, hey, we together? Nobody has a real conversation.
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: They just fall into we're together.
• 46:59
  Speaker 2: I've never had a conversation.
• 47:00
  Speaker 3: It's like I meet a nigga and we together.
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: I've never actually had a conversation. That's why I be
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: fucking up at.
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: Let me tell you, every relationship I was in, I've
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: been given an ultimatum. That's how I ended up in
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: the relationship.
• 47:15
  Speaker 3: What? You in band.
• 47:16
  Speaker 2: I know it.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: Swear to God.
• 47:17
  Speaker 3: Swear to God.
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: Take that motherfucker away, God.
• 47:19
  Speaker 3: Let me see something.
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: Because ain't no way. Every single relationship, I was given, like,
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: an ultimatum.
• 47:27
  Speaker 3: Like, Tammy, I'm about to play with you no more, man.
• 47:30
  Speaker 3: Either we gonna be together.
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 47:32
  Speaker 3: So you get the ultimatum? Yeah. Yo, this is wild.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: Swear to God, every time. Commitment is like, ew.
• 47:46
  Speaker 3: It's scary.
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: Not anymore. Yeah, it's scary. You know, for me, I've
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: always been a commitment-phobe, like, Why do we need that?
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: Why do we need to do that? Everything is fine
• 47:55
  Speaker 1: how it is. You know, why do we have to determine, like,
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: what this is? It's good, ain't it? You happy? I'm happy.
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: Why we got to put labels on it? That was me.
• 48:07
  Speaker 3: Shame. That's a grown man, okay? I don't like feeling confused.
• 48:13
  Speaker 3: I don't like it.
• 48:14
  Speaker 2: I don't like it.
• 48:14
  Speaker 3: I don't like it. And I'm at a place now,
• 48:16
  Speaker 3: I'm not waiting in no situationship for no long-ass fucking time.
• 48:23
  Speaker 3: If I'm fucking with somebody now, I don't have no
• 48:25
  Speaker 3: expectations of them. I don't.
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: No?
• 48:29
  Speaker 3: No. I expect you to be exactly who you are, right?
• 48:32
  Speaker 3: Because you probably already did some shit for me to
• 48:35
  Speaker 3: side-eye you anyway. So now I'm looking forward to the
• 48:39
  Speaker 3: next bullshit. But in the meantime, I'll still say, especially
• 48:43
  Speaker 3: if we have good times together, we're good friends and
• 48:45
  Speaker 3: shit like that, but I can't have expectations for.
• 48:50
  Speaker 3: A man who doesn't want kids.
• 48:52
  Speaker 2: What am I supposed to do? I don't have any kids,
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: but you do.
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: But here's the thing. Why do you still entertain them
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: if you have no expectations at that point?
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: Because it's like, it's no pressure.
• 49:05
  Speaker 3: It's no, like, maybe I don't want to be in
• 49:06
  Speaker 3: a committed relationship right now. You know what I'm saying?
• 49:09
  Speaker 3: I feel like if I get to that point to
• 49:10
  Speaker 3: where I'm ready for that, then I would probably just
• 49:13
  Speaker 3: be by myself for a while. And that just means
• 49:16
  Speaker 3: I wouldn't be having sex with anybody. Because, I mean,
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: the person I'm having sex with like, we go out,
• 49:20
  Speaker 3: we do things. But could we ever be in a
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: committed relationship?
• 49:26
  Speaker 2: I don't think so.
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: No.
• 49:29
  Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't think so.
• 49:31
  Speaker 2: We probably have two different life paths at this point.
• 49:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I want a boyfriend now, though. I think I'm
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: in a space where The next guy that I date
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: seriously would not have to give me an ultimatum for
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: a relationship.
• 49:45
  Speaker 3: Right. Growth.
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: Look at that.
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: Look at that. Bitch.
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: Almost in her mid-30s, finally ready to get serious with
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: a nigga.
• 49:59
  Speaker 3: Shame.
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: Shame, shame, shame.
• 50:02
  Speaker 3: All right, y'all. So after this break, I want to
• 50:05
  Speaker 3: get into what black men dislike the most about dating.
• 50:09
  Speaker 2: All right. And some of you ladies, this might be you.
• 50:18
  Speaker 3: So this is from Essence, you guys, an article about
• 50:24
  Speaker 3: what black men dislike the most about dating. So it
• 50:28
  Speaker 3: lists a few things from black men between the ages
• 50:32
  Speaker 3: of like 35 and 40, different walks of life, essentially.
• 50:37
  Speaker 3: So one of the things that black men don't like
• 50:41
  Speaker 3: is women changing after becoming exclusive. So this guy says,
• 50:46
  Speaker 3: don't change once we become exclusive. The dating period is
• 50:51
  Speaker 3: a time for evaluation. It's a chance for us to
• 50:53
  Speaker 3: get to know each other and decide whether or not
• 50:56
  Speaker 3: we want to take the relationship to another level. If
• 50:58
  Speaker 3: you were okay with me going out with my boys periodically,
• 51:03
  Speaker 3: enjoyed physical fitness and cooking meals, and kept yourself well-premped
• 51:08
  Speaker 3: throughout the dating period. Don't change those things once we
• 51:11
  Speaker 3: become exclusive. I think that that's probably one of the
• 51:14
  Speaker 3: number one complaints for men is that women change after
• 51:16
  Speaker 3: they actually get into the relationship.
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: That's fair. I feel like that's fair.
• 51:22
  Speaker 3: They change too, though. I don't think they recognize it.
• 51:25
  Speaker 3: Everybody changes. Some men don't transition from single to in
• 51:29
  Speaker 3: a relationship, so they think they can still do the
• 51:31
  Speaker 3: same things that.
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: They did while single. Some things are supposed to change. Right.
• 51:36
  Speaker 3: Exactly. You know, so you want me to be, you
• 51:39
  Speaker 3: want me to be your wife or your homie, lover, friend,
• 51:41
  Speaker 3: which one?
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: Because that looks different.
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: And then when a woman has a baby, it's hard
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: to get that weight off. Don't judge her, help her.
• 51:50
  Speaker 2: Well, we ain't even talk about kids. We talk about
• 51:52
  Speaker 2: the dating shit.
• 51:53
  Speaker 3: But that happens.
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: They like physical fitness. Typically that's what they, you know,
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: talking about when a woman.
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: I don't think so. I always gain relationship weight. Oh really? Like, yes. Like,
• 52:05
  Speaker 3: laying up, eating, y'all eating out more, you have a
• 52:08
  Speaker 3: partner to eat out with all the time. Like, you
• 52:10
  Speaker 3: start getting a little bit plump.
• 52:12
  Speaker 1: Oh, that happy weight.
• 52:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah. It happens to women a lot. So we have
• 52:17
  Speaker 3: to find a balance. Usually we get fit after we
• 52:22
  Speaker 3: get hurt. Yeah. Like, fuck this nigga, I'm about to
• 52:26
  Speaker 3: get my body back.
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: I've been single so long now, I don't even know what, like,
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: I don't know what my weight I can attribute it to.
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: Just eating by.
• 52:33
  Speaker 3: Myself, I guess. Dating. Still dating. The next thing, having
• 52:42
  Speaker 3: expectations you don't meet yourself. I get discouraged a lot
• 52:47
  Speaker 3: when I hear women say what they are looking for,
• 52:50
  Speaker 3: but not truly meaning it. You want a business owner,
• 52:53
  Speaker 3: you want a go-getter, but upset when he is working
• 52:57
  Speaker 3: to go get it. You want someone who is financially stable,
• 53:00
  Speaker 3: but your spending habits are terrible. Know that if you
• 53:04
  Speaker 3: want a business owner, you may have to bring dinner
• 53:07
  Speaker 3: to the office because true business owners work late hours.
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: So you want this man who's getting to the bag,
• 53:13
  Speaker 2: y'all getting to the bag.
• 53:15
  Speaker 3: That looks different, you know, as opposed to a nigga
• 53:18
  Speaker 3: who's not working anywhere. Right.
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: What do you really want? But we want it both.
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: We want a man who got money and can be
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: at home all the time.
• 53:30
  Speaker 3: Nah, you don't want a man that can be at
• 53:31
  Speaker 3: home all the time. You don't get sick of seeing him.
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: Like, you don't want no place to be? Not all
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: the time, but you know, like, when we want it.
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: When we want them there.
• 53:42
  Speaker 3: Is that realistic?
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: It's not. But that's what we want.
• 53:46
  Speaker 3: But that's why you have to have some business about yourself.
• 53:49
  Speaker 3: Then that way you're not concerned about what he's doing
• 53:51
  Speaker 3: all day long with his time. You got shit to
• 53:53
  Speaker 3: do too. And then we all come together. Everything is copacetic.
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 54:00
  Speaker 3: Next thing, having parameters around sex, especially if you want
• 54:04
  Speaker 3: it to. That one's kind of sketchy because.
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: What.
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: Do they mean by parameters around sex?
• 54:13
  Speaker 3: So it says, sex should not be a reward in
• 54:16
  Speaker 3: a relationship. This is what the guy says. Not saying
• 54:20
  Speaker 3: that if you're not in the mood, it isn't valid.
• 54:23
  Speaker 3: It is. However... If it's a simple argument or misunderstanding
• 54:28
  Speaker 3: that you know is not a deal breaker, don't lay
• 54:30
  Speaker 3: on the other side of the bed or in another
• 54:32
  Speaker 3: room when you know sex has nothing to do with
• 54:37
  Speaker 3: the issue. I gotta be happy.
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: To have sex. Yeah, how am I gonna want to
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: have sex with you if I'm mad at you?
• 54:43
  Speaker 3: Nah, I gotta be happy to have sex. Otherwise, it
• 54:45
  Speaker 3: feels like rape. I'm sorry.
• 54:47
  Speaker 2: That's just how I feel.
• 54:48
  Speaker 3: If mentally I'm not there, my pussy is not gonna work. Yeah.
• 54:53
  Speaker 3: It's not going to work.
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: And I just don't feel comfortable just doing it because
• 54:55
  Speaker 2: you want to.
• 54:56
  Speaker 3: Do it too.
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: Because then it's going to be, you ain't even going
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: to want none of my pussy if I'm mad. Because
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: it's not going to be good.
• 55:00
  Speaker 3: Hurry up. Hurry up, Lucas. Just looking like. That's how
• 55:07
  Speaker 3: I'm going to sound.
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: Do that sound good? Your dick going to go down quick. Right.
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: Hurry up.
• 55:11
  Speaker 3: I can see a nigga just pushing my leg over like, mad,
• 55:14
  Speaker 3: get out the bed. Like, I told you I didn't
• 55:15
  Speaker 3: want to do it.
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: No, but they'll still get it. They'll still get it though.
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: They still take it.
• 55:19
  Speaker 3: That's terrible.
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: That is terrible.
• 55:21
  Speaker 3: Why would you want it?
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: Hurry up, pull your dick out. Get on my fucking nerves.
• 55:27
  Speaker 3: Here's a big one, y'all. And this is a lot
• 55:28
  Speaker 3: of women's issues. Not mine, because I don't do the
• 55:30
  Speaker 3: social media shit like that. But letting social media control
• 55:33
  Speaker 3: your expectations.
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: Posting.
• 55:36
  Speaker 2: You got to post your relationship. You got to post
• 55:38
  Speaker 2: every place y'all go.
• 55:40
  Speaker 3: Like, you're letting social media solidify your relationship with your partner.
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: That shit is very dangerous.
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that is stupid too.
• 55:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so men have a problem with that. This guy says,
• 55:52
  Speaker 3: I hate the constant need to be seen and trying
• 55:54
  Speaker 3: to live up to celebrity relationships instead of building one.
• 55:58
  Speaker 3: I understand that everyone wants to be noticed, but I
• 56:00
  Speaker 3: feel as though women have taken that to another level
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: with social media being your biggest influences. In my relationships,
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: I've only had one public relationship on social media. Well,
• 56:12
  Speaker 3: I'll say two. But I never initiated the postings. and
• 56:16
  Speaker 3: stuff like that. Like if they started it, I might
• 56:18
  Speaker 3: post a picture or two. I got off of social
• 56:22
  Speaker 3: media in 2012 because my ex started the posting shit, right?
• 56:28
  Speaker 3: And then he took all, just abruptly, took all our
• 56:32
  Speaker 3: shit off of his social media. So I was like,
• 56:36
  Speaker 3: what the fuck you got going on? Mind you, I
• 56:38
  Speaker 3: only had like a couple shit posted on mine. So
• 56:39
  Speaker 3: I'm like, what is your, why are you deleting memories
• 56:43
  Speaker 3: from your social media?
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: What's up with that? Just don't post no more.
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: So mine would be the exact opposite, would be like,
• 56:50
  Speaker 1: we together, but you only posting pictures of you. Like,
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: we not together.
• 56:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so.
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: I'm like, why? This is my social media about me.
• 57:02
  Speaker 3: That's what you were saying? Yo. I mean, I never
• 57:06
  Speaker 3: got into that because I don't like people in my
• 57:08
  Speaker 3: business like that. That's what I.
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: Don't like either. Like, if we together, why do everybody
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: need to see it?
• 57:14
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: We're together. If they see us outside, they see us outside.
• 57:18
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 57:19
  Speaker 1: Guys would assume I would be just trying to make
• 57:22
  Speaker 1: myself more available to other men because I didn't post them.
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: Do you feel like that?
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: I feel like they trying to use your social media
• 57:29
  Speaker 2: for their promotion.
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 57:33
  Speaker 3: I felt like that in a relationship. Like, why are
• 57:35
  Speaker 3: you pressing me to post you on my page? You
• 57:38
  Speaker 3: know what I'm saying?
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: You barely have anything of me on your page. That's
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: a different relationship.
• 57:42
  Speaker 3: But the original one where there was, like, a lot
• 57:44
  Speaker 3: of posting and shit like that, once he deleted all
• 57:47
  Speaker 3: those pictures off his social media, and I, like, I
• 57:49
  Speaker 3: started deleting pictures off mine. And it shit hurt my
• 57:51
  Speaker 3: feelings so bad to delete the pictures. I just deleted
• 57:54
  Speaker 3: social media. Like, I don't even want to be on
• 57:56
  Speaker 3: social media now. You can have it.
• 57:58
  Speaker 2: Nigga, do what you want to do online. I'm not online.
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: So you don't got to worry about me.
• 58:03
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying? The next nigga I post
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: is going to be in my wedding dress.
• 58:07
  Speaker 3: Right. I ain't posting niggas.
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: Exactly. Issa Rae didn't post a nigga until they got married.
• 58:12
  Speaker 3: That's only right. That's only right because essentially you're single
• 58:16
  Speaker 3: until you get married, man. Anything can happen in between time.
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 58:20
  Speaker 3: Yep. So the next is dependency without support. This is
• 58:26
  Speaker 3: a good one. So this guy says, I believe my
• 58:28
  Speaker 3: biggest complaint would be dependency displayed by women updated. Traditionally,
• 58:33
  Speaker 3: men assume the role of the provider. Although that isn't
• 58:36
  Speaker 3: an issue, it becomes one when I become a sole
• 58:40
  Speaker 3: provider for a relationship only for purposes of living. to
• 58:43
  Speaker 3: expectations of social media. This includes lavish vacations, expensive dinners,
• 58:48
  Speaker 3: and other things they like to pose for the world
• 58:50
  Speaker 3: to enjoy. That in of itself is not a problem. However,
• 58:55
  Speaker 3: if it's expected for us to live this lifestyle, plan
• 58:57
  Speaker 3: to support me and see how you can help so
• 59:00
  Speaker 3: we can feel like we've arrived together. So that was
• 59:03
  Speaker 3: kind of sad to me. So it says dependency without support.
• 59:08
  Speaker 3: So now you're a dependant. on this man to do
• 59:11
  Speaker 3: all these things. But what are you doing to support
• 59:14
  Speaker 3: the relationship? What are you doing to support your goals? Right.
• 59:20
  Speaker 3: Everything can't be on a man. I feel like that
• 59:22
  Speaker 3: could be an unrealistic thing women do.
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: That's fair. I receive that. I don't feel like I
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: go into relationships like... Codependent. Yeah, me, me, me, me,
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: give me, give me, give me.
• 59:36
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: But I am that kind of way when it comes
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: to affection. Like, I'm clingy. That run niggas off too. Bitch,
• 59:47
  Speaker 1: get off of me.
• 59:50
  Speaker 3: I like intimacy more than sex. Like, I just want
• 59:52
  Speaker 3: to lay up. Yeah, me too.
• 59:53
  Speaker 1: Watch TV. Yeah, I want to cuddle.
• 59:55
  Speaker 3: Touch on each other.
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: Let's watch the 1619 Project cuddled on the couch, you know?
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Ain't nothing wrong with that. Ain't nothing wrong with that.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 3: I guess dating is different for everybody.
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: It is.
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: Is what this episode is about, essentially. It just looks different.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 3: It's not no one set definition of dating. But women,
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 3: we definitely... have to start putting the expectation out there
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 3: before having sex if you're actually dating with intent and
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 3: we didn't even get to that um because it's about
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 3: knowing yourself first if you're actually dating with intent knowing
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 3: what you want what you want out of out of
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 3: a relationship what goals things like that instead of just
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 3: jumping off a ledge and dating a bunch of niggas
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 3: and And men also, if you dating with intent, you
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: won't be complaining about dates and how much they cost.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: Right, that part.
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 2: And your budget for them. Because you would have selected.
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 3: Like one or two women that you don't mind being with.
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 3: You're going to eat anyway.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 1: Right, and you won't feel slighted. Because I think a
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 1: lot of times, oftentimes men feel slighted because they spend
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 1: so much money on a date and the outcome doesn't
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: go exactly how they intended.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because... they should get a prostitute instead of trying
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 3: to get regular women to do whole shit. Yeah.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: Stop thinking that your girl owe you some coochie cause y'all,
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: you took, you spent a couple of dollars on a date.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: That's so dumb.
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah. And that's why they be mad instead of dating with, uh,
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 3: intentions and actually dating people you like and who like
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 3: you and who already want to fuck you after the date.
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 2: You are basically, we got to pay for a dinner with.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 3: Pussy and you're paying with money.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 2: That's basically what's happening. That's not an even exchange.
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 3: It's just not.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: It's just not.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 3: Because you could just get a hoe, pay her, and
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 3: you don't got to worry about none of this shit.
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 3: But y'all want hoe shit.
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: And regular women. Where do you find hoes at now, though? Like,
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: what is the forum?
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: They online, too. What you talking about?
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: But I mean, like, the type of hoes that you can, like,
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: just pay to have sex.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 3: We had one on the show before. Like, they are
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 3: on social media. They are on OnlyFans. Like... It's the
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 3: same hoes. Instagram is a whole hoedex. It's somebody out
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 3: there that's going to bust it open, but that's not
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 3: what they want. Men don't like to feel like they're
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 3: paying directly for coochie.
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 2: A lot of them. They still want to do it indirectly, discreetly.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: Because they don't want to feel like they have to
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 1: pay for it. Yeah, they don't want to feel like
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 1: they're tricking. But, I mean, essentially that's what it is.
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 2: So the same way I understand men.
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 3: Men are concerned about their wallet the same way we're
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 3: concerned about a man taking advantage of us sexually.
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 2: It's understandable. Make better choices.
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Make better dating choices.
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 1: No more pussy mismanagement 2023.
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 3: Or, you know, you could do what you want to do,
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 3: but you have to understand, like, the outcome might be
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 3: a little bit different. If you actually want to be
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 3: in a relationship with a man and your goal is
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 3: to be married, You need to state that early and soon.
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 3: Usually on the first date.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 2: First date. Even if you're dating multiple men.
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 3: First date.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: You also don't want to come off as thirsty.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 3: You can't be concerned about how you look into somebody.
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 3: Because the right person is going to receive it the
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 3: exact way.
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: You're saying it.
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 3: It's true. What's thirsty?
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: I want to be married in a year. I want
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 2: to be married in two years.
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 3: How is that thirsty?
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 1: No, not that. But I mean, I'm just saying if
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: you go on and on and on about it, it
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 1: will scare a nigga off.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 3: And nobody's saying on and on and on about it. See,
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 3: the thing is, you be thinking like a nigga. No,
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 3: that's what I'm just saying. You thinking like, oh, this
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 3: bitch nagging me. That's how you thinking. The right man
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 3: who's ready for marriage, he'll receive it the way you're
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 3: saying it. Not on and on and on, but.
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I'm saying. State your intentions, but don't
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 1: go crazy with it. That's all I'm saying.
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 2: How does that look, going crazy with it?
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 1: If you get in there talking about, like, you already
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 1: picked wedding colors and you know what your wedding dress
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: is going to look like.
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 3: Be fucking realistic. Come on, man. Bitches be like that.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 1: Bitches be out here like that.
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 3: I've been wondering.
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: I got a scrapbook from when I was five.
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: I brought it with me.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 3: Do you like these colors? That does not fucking happen
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 3: in real life. But just put your expectations out there
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 3: so there's no confusion. You know what I'm saying?
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: Girl, there'll still be some fucking confusion. A man will
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 1: know you're ready for marriage and still play with you.
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: Is he playing with you or are you playing with yourself?
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 3: Well, I ain't ready for that. But still dating you,
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 3: knowing that you're not ready. And see, this is why
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 3: I do reverse psychology on him. The same way you
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 3: can tell me what you're not ready for and you
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 3: continue to fuck with me, well, I continue to fuck
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 3: with you, right? And I'm telling you, this is what
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 3: I want. And you continue to fuck with me? How
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 3: is the onus only on me at the end of
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 3: the day? Oh, you knew what it was, nigga.
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 1: So did you.
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 3: You knew what it was. You knew I wanted a baby.
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 3: You knew I wanted a relationship. Why is it only
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 3: on me?
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 3: Don't let these niggas handle y'all, ladies. Don't do it.
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: I told you I didn't want that. I told you
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 1: I did.
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 3: Period. And you stayed. Right.
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 1: So clearly you wanted to, clearly you wanted to.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 3: Hey, you've been coming to me.
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: So clearly you wanted to. You the pappy. You're not
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 1: coming to me though. Cause I'm using a condom every time.
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 1: I'm watching my ovulation every time.
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 3: All right, y'all. I don't know. I hope this was
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 3: helpful for 2023 dating and summer games, 2023. I really
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 3: hope this was helpful. Make better choices, ladies and gents.
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 3: And hopefully we'll have more marriages. A lot of breakups
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 3: during the pandemic. But maybe people will start getting married again.
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 3: I thought Gucci Mane and Keisha K. Orr was going
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 3: to up the marriage rating for black people, but it
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 3: didn't work.
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 1: I don't think it's going to work like that. Not
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 1: when you still got future doing numbers.
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 3: Shay, I'm future at heart a little bit. I be
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 3: giving future a hard time, but I could be future sometimes.
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 2: I understand now.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 1: I don't think I'm future. Never mind. Let's just hang up. Wait,
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 1: before we go, it is February. It is Black History Month.
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 1: It's Black History all year long. But in the month
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 1: of February, we love to observe and celebrate our Black
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 1: baddies who talk back. And for this week, I have
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 1: to start with Diane Nash. Of many accomplishments, Nash has
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: made in her lifelong commitment to civil rights activism. Her
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 1: most famous contributions include her work organizing and leading Freedom
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 1: Rides and sit-ins. Nash, who was born in Chicago, got
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: involved with the civil rights movement when she enrolled at
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: Fisk University in Nashville, Tennessee in 1959. In April 1960,
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: She helped found the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee. Nash also
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 1: coordinated the Nashville Student Movement Ride, which was part of
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 1: the Freedom Rides in 1961. Coordinating between her fellow students,
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: the media, and the Department of Justice, she engaged in
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: sit-ins herself, even spending time in jail in February 1961
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 1: in solidarity with the Little Rock Nine. Now, if you
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 1: don't know who that is, you need to get your
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 1: ass up and Google this free. But anyway, there are
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 1: nine students that were imprisoned after a sit-in in Rock Hill,
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 1: South Carolina. Nash also coordinated the Nashville Student Movement Ride,
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 1: which was part of the Freedom Rides in 1961, coordinating
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 1: between her fellow students, the media, and the Department of Justice.
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 1: She engaged in sit-ins herself, even spending time in jail
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 1: in February 1961, in solidarity with the Rock Hill Nine,
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 1: nine students that were imprisoned after a sit-in. Nash also
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 1: played a crucial role in the desegregation campaign in Birmingham
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 1: in 1963. She also received a Rosa Parks Award from
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 1: the SCLC along with her husband in 1965. Diane Nash,
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 1: we salute you, girl. You are a baddie who talks back.
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for your contribution.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 3: If you enjoyed this episode, please tune in every Thursday
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 3: on the iHeartRadio app or wherever the fuck you get
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 3: your podcast at. This is your co-host, AJ Holiday. Y'all
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 3: follow me on Instagram. It's AJHoliday2. 0 because some white bitch
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 3: took my AJ Holiday.
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 1: Y'all, I'm official tan bam on instagram y'all follow me
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 1: i love y'all thank y'all for tuning in and we
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 1: will see you next week god willing remember to speak
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 1: now
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 2: And never hold your peace deuces