Latest / The Body Pod / Midlife Mind vs. Brain: Dr. Caroline Leaf on Toxic Thoughts, Neuroplasticity & Healing After 40

Transcript

Midlife Mind vs. Brain: Dr. Caroline Leaf on Toxic Thoughts, Neuroplasticity & Healing After 40 · The Body Pod

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: You're not controlled by these intrusive thoughts. You're not controlled
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: by the sensations in your body.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: All of those are simply signals.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: The control is in your mind. So look at those
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: as signals and data, and then you can do the changing. Hi, everyone.
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: My name is Hayley. And this is Laura. And welcome
• 0:17
  Speaker 3: to The Body Pod.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: Dr.
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: Caroline Leith, welcome to The Body Pod.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: Thank you. It's so nice to be with you both.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: And wow, first of all, you're such a powerhouse. We
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: were trying to determine how many books have you written?
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: 19 and actually 20. My 20th one's just gone in now.
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: How old were you when you wrote your first book?
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: Gosh, I'm 63 now.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: I think it was, I was in my late 30s
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: or early 30s, somewhere around there.
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: Well, you've got a lot to say then, which is
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: super exciting for us. So if we start with, the
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: you've spent over 40 years researching the mind and brain connection. Now,
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: this was the first time that I've heard, I blumped
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: mind and brain the same. But are you saying that
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: there is like you kind of separate the mind and
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: the brain? Or is that just the same in conversation?
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: No, they're totally different.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: And this has been that this is the mistake of
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: the modern scientific era is this blending of that is
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: infiltrated into the general media and the general public's understanding.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: So for the last around 50 years, there's been this
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: kind of mix of the two, but they're totally different.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: And it came from.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: The concept of materialism or the current modern version of
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: that is physicalism. And physicalism, in simple language, means that
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: everything is physical. So there was a move in science,
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: and it's one movement in science.
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: It's not different.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: It's not even a very good movement in science because
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: it's pretty much been disproved, but it's very dominant in
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: the current media and the sort of scientific language, the
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: way people describe things. And that move was, if you
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: can see it, touch it, feel it, it exists. If
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: it doesn't, then it's not important. So therefore, the biology
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: or the physical became the most important.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: That's physicalism.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: So what they basically say is that the brain is it,
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: and it generates the mind as an epiphenomenon or a mistake.
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: And that's the message that is brought through to.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: All the media and what most people, the average person, thinks.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: But it's not a scientific theory that was proven. It's
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: very assumptive, and it's actually been disproved for thousands of years.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: From the old mystics, philosophers, et cetera, up in 100
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: years of neuroscience, they've been very clearly telling us that
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: We have a mind, we have a brain, and we
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: have a body. And the brain and the body are.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: A host, quite literally. They're a host. And they host what?
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: They host the mind.
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: Now, you probably also see what's very popular at the
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: moment is the concept of consciousness, which is also old.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: But you'll see it popping up with Apple News and
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: it's all over the place. Consciousness scientists have discovered what
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: consciousness is in the brain and that sort of thing.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: Now, the word consciousness is.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: A big word that is used to represent mind. So
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: mind is who you are. It is your thinking, feeling, choosing, loving,
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: appreciating life, being able to have this discussion.
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: That's mind. The brain doesn't do any of this.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: But the mind needs a substrate, a host that it
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: can work through. And so your brain basically and your
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: body are basically that substrate. So things aren't stored just
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: in the brain, which for years people have thought, oh, well,
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: the brain is the center of everything. I mean, it
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: does a lot, but it's not where everything is stored.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: There's a format of our thought life that is stored
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: in the brain. And then there's a format that's stored
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: through every cell of the body.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: So as your.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: Listeners and viewers are listening to us now, every single
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: word that we say becomes an energetic force that the
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: mind processes and then.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: Puts it into the host.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: It codes fragments of it into the brain in one
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: way and into the body in another way. And it
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: all happens faster than you can imagine, faster than 400
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: million actions per second. So you literally are wiring. this
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: conversation into your brain. You're wiring you with your mind.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: You're wiring life into the brain and the body. And
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: that connection between the mind, which is this energetic consciousness field,
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: it's fundamental to reality. Mind is fundamental, not atoms and
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: not quarks and.
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: All those things.
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: Mind is fundamental to reality. And mind is 99% of
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: who we are. And the mind uses the brain and
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: body as a host. And so when someone dies, for example,
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: as soon as the body starts to disintegrate, within this
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: easy way to understand, within 15 to 20 seconds of
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: the heart stopping, the brain flatlines and every single cell
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: of the body disintegrates. The mind continues on. Consciousness continues.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: And there's so much research confirming that. Not spoken about
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: enough in popular science and popular mechanics and all those things.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: It's not spoken about enough, but there's more science showing
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: that than there is showing that a statin works. I mean,
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: it's crazy, but we hear more about statins for cholesterol
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: than we hear about how important mind is. So for
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: the last 50 years, this has been the sort of
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: thing that the mind and the brain are the same thing.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: And that's why most people, and it's not even any
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: judgment on you or anyone, but that's what you've been told.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: And it's not even correct science. So there's a lot
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: of us scientists that are fighting that and trying to
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: help people understand that there is a huge difference between
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: And the difference makes a huge difference in how you
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: run your life.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: It's enormous.
• 5:47
  Speaker 3: So is mind and soul, where does that play in?
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: We kind of use the same words.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: So if you think of it like this, these are,
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: you know, these linguistics that are coming into play here, semantics.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: So basically mind is consciousness and soul is another word
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: for a part of that. You also get spirit. You know,
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: you'll hear spirit, spirit, soul. Very often in the religious circles,
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: you'll hear spirit, soul, body. In your more science-y circles,
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: you'll hear consciousness to kind.
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: Of incorporate all of it.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: In your more spiritual traditions, you'll hear the spiritual side
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: of you and the physical side of you. Essentially, it's
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: mind being dominant, which is consciousness, soul, spirit, all of that,
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: and then brain and body.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: And brain and body are hosts.
• 6:31
  Speaker 3: Okay, so then that's kind of where religion comes in
• 6:35
  Speaker 3: is people take mind and say, oh, it's spirit. And
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: now I'm going down a rabbit hole. No, no, it's good.
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: You're asking a good question. You're actually asking a very
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: good question.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: So from a religious or sort of spiritual viewpoint, the
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: mind that you could break up into the soul and
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: the spirit. And the soul being what scientifically we call
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: the conscious mind. So consciousness has a conscious mind, a
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: subconscious mind, and a non-conscious mind. And I know it
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: sounds confusing, but it's not that confusing. What one has
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: to do in listening to this is just throw everything
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: out that you've ever heard and just think of it
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: like this. Okay, there's mind and there's brain and body. Now,
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: mind is 99% of.
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: Who you are.
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: Brain and body, 1%.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: Mind has got the eternal value.
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: It goes on and on and on and on and on.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: So you are you, and we have all the mathematics
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: and all the physics to confirm this. In fact, what
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: we have, just to diverse a little bit and to
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: try and make this as simple as possible, we've all
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: heard of Einstein.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: We've all heard of space-time, even if you don't know
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: what it is.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: That basically is saying that that's it. Space-time is fundamental.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: So it kind of says physical is fundamental. Then you
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: get quantum physics. I'm sure you've heard of quantum physics
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: in your listeners and viewers. And that is showing us
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: a deeper level of physics that answers questions that basic
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: physics can't. But that's still stuck in the physical realm
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: with a lot more creativity. Then you get the third advancement,
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: which is called high energy physics.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: And that's what my work falls into. It draws on
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: all the others too.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: And high energy physics shows how Space, time and quantum
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: physics are fantastic, but they're not everything.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: They only explain the physical dimension.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Really well, how our brain and bodies work and how
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: the physical world works around us. But they don't explain
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: the spirit very well, the spiritual side of us, this
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: mind side of us, this consciousness, whereas high energy physics does.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: And it has the mathematics and it's the most advanced,
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: basically the most advanced form of science. And it answers
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: all those questions. For years, people thought science and spirituality
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: were two separate things. And religion is one thing and
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: science is another. And a lot of religious environments would
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: say science is evil. And think of Galileo. I mean,
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: the church locked him in house arrest and eventually was
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: killed because he said that the earth revolved around the sun,
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: not the other way around. And so it's on its
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: axis and it's moving around the sun. And so as
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: we advance, people learn more.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: Look at things differently.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: So yeah, so you can go down that route. So spirituality, soul, mind, consciousness.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: So I always, to make it easy for people, I
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: always just say, think of the word mind. It's the
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: oldest word. And consciousness is a more modern word. And
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: then think of mind as, if you want to look
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: at the religious side, spirit and soul. Spirit being the
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: deepest part, soul being the more surface part. And if
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: you want the science explanation of that, you've got to
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: talk about conscious mind, the subconscious mind and the non-conscious.
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: And I can explain the difference there. This is what
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: I've spent 40 years researching.
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: I'm shook. I feel like I want 12 hours of
• 9:49
  Speaker 3: you to break up everything that is entering my mind
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: right now. Yeah, let's break down the three of those.
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: Fascinating.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, so another thing that people would have heard of
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: is the unconscious. We hear about unconscious a lot. I'm
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: sure you've heard that word unconscious. Now, unconscious is not
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: a mind state. It is a brain state. So when
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: you're asleep or under an anesthesia or you get knocked out.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: By a baseball bat, hopefully that won't happen to you, whatever.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: Body's unconscious. So we go into an unconscious state every
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: time we sleep. But that's what mind, that is just
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: a brain state. Unfortunately, it's got the word conscious attached
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: to it, unconscious, so it confuses a lot of people.
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: People often think the unconscious is the same as the subconscious.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: So it's confusing when you think of consciousness or conscious, consciousness, conscious.
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: Subconscious, non-conscious, unconscious. It's confusing.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: So just take the unconscious out of the picture.
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: That's a brain state when you're asleep.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: Think of it like that. Okay, that's on the side.
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: Then on this side, we've got mind. The other word
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: for mind is consciousness. I don't know why, but that's
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: just the word that's used. Now take that mind consciousness
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: domain and break it up into three parts. The one
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: part is consciousness. The other part's subconscious and the other
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: part's non-conscious. Let's start with the non-conscious. Well, let's start
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: with the conscious because it's easiest to understand. When you're awake,
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: you're conscious.
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: Simple as that.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: So when you're asleep, you get unconscious. So it's a
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: state of mind and unconscious is when you, because your
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: mind never switches off. So that's why when the brain goes,
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: that's why we talk about unconscious when the brain goes
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: to sleep. So the conscious mind is when you're awake.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: It's what you are now.
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: You're aware.
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: You're aware of listening to me and thinking of the
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: thoughts in your head and the questions you're going to
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: ask me and what you did before you came here
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: and the colors around you and the sounds.
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: You're conscious.
• 11:38
  Speaker 4: You're aware.
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: You're aware when you speak. You're awake.
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: So that's what consciousness is. It's your thinking, feeling, and
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: choosing that you're very consciously aware of. Then you've got
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: your non-conscious, N-O-N. That is the biggest part of you.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: It's infinite in size. It is what on a religious
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: level or spiritual level, we would call the spirit. So
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: the non-conscious is the deepest part of you. The most
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: intelligence is where your intelligence resides. It's where your creativity
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: is forever expanding. It's where your things like intuition, insight, wisdom,
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: all that good stuff, that's where it resides. And it
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: is on your side. It never stops working. Your non-conscious
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: mind operates 24-7. It's absorbing your entire environment, everything you're
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: exposed to, processing it, eliminating a lot of the stuff
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: you don't need or that could be disruptive, and it's
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: building solutions to every problem.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: It has all the answers.
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: And what we see from high-energy physics is that this
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: non-conscious mind never ever stops. It's unique to you. Each
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: of us has our own non-conscious, but it is connected.
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: So the three of us are talking, we connect it
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: through the non-conscious. So you have yours, I have mine,
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: you each have our own, but we are connected. So
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: it's like a bubble. Think of the bubble around you
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: and that being your conscious, your mind, okay? And the
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: non-conscious is the deepest part of it. And that circle
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: around you is the conscious, subconscious, and the non-conscious being
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: the deepest.
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: And you have yours, I have mine.
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: So we've kind of got these bubbles that go around
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: us and through us, which is this mind energy. Each
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: of us uniquely have your own unique one. But all
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: of us are connected. And some of us, there's a
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: connection where we really get on and others we don't
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: get on as well.
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: And, you know, that's all.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: But we're all connected. And you've probably heard of things
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: like we're all one and there's a connection. And no
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: one really knows what that means. So I try and
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: put nice, simple terms that we've each got our own bubble,
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: but all of our bubbles are connected. So think of
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: your child blowing bubbles, and you've seen kids blowing bubbles,
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: and all the bubbles kind of pop and become one
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: big watery mess. We're all connected in that way, and
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: it's an eternal connection. So that's kind of heavy stuff,
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: but the simple version is that it never stops.
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: It operates 24-7.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: It's connected to everything else, and it's connected to whatever
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: the source of everything is.
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: That could be, you may think it's God.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: Godness, universe, source, whatever you believe is We all understand
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: a religious, this is a cross-cultural, cross-age concept that everyone
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: literally recognizes that there is something beyond just who we are. Now,
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: there are your atheists and so on that believe that
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: once you do, that's it, there's nothing else. When you
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: really talk to them, you'll see that there is still
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: this awareness. Look at a rainbow. You think, wow, you know,
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: where does that come from? There's something going on. So
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: we've all got that instinct. And that's what our non-consciouses
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: are connected to. And that's where wisdom resides. At our core,
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: we're very wise, eternal beings, but we live in a
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: body for a period of time, and that body has
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: a brain.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: And the body and the.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: Brain host fragments of information. It's like data points, like
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: coding of a computer. A computer doesn't think. When you
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: watch TV, that person isn't in the TV.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: It's a code. That's what our brain and body do.
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: It's codes.
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: But your mind is making sense of the code, if
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: that makes sense, because it built it. So the non-conscious
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: is always working 24-7, whereas the conscious mind goes to
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: sleep when you're asleep. The subconscious is in between the two,
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: and it acts like a filter, and a holding area,
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: or a waiting room, and it holds the thoughts that
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: you need in the moment, because you've got trillions of thoughts.
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: Now, what is a thought?
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: A thought is an experience, and you've been having experiences
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: since you were in the womb, and So by now,
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: whatever age you're at, I'm 63, we've got trillions upon
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: trillions upon billions of experiences. So every experience we ever have,
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: the non-conscious mind processes, filters, sorts, and builds into a
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: little like a cloud of energy. Think of the sky
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: and think of a cloud. That's also a nice way
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: to imagine the mind, the sky. And you think of
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: the sky, it just never goes on and on and on.
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: So it's the universe and galaxies, that sort of good
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: representation of mind. So you've got this, every experience we
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: ever have becomes a little cloud of energy. And your
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: non-conscious mind processes that. So it's first this energy in
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: your non-conscious mind, and then it codes fragments of that
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: as data points into the brain and the body. And
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: that's happening all day long. Then at nighttime, your non-conscious
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: mind's sorting out things. That's why we dream and housekeeping
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: and whatever. Now, our conscious, so then at any one,
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: when we awake, when we're conscious, And the subconscious kicks
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: in because whatever is relevant that you need to get
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: through the day, like you would have discussed what this
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: podcast is about. You've done research on me. So your
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: conscious mind has got that data available. So you need
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: this data available for this interview. I read about your
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: podcast and about the two of you, et cetera, et cetera,
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: and whatever. So that is available. That was information I processed,
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: built into.
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: My mind, me, my mind.
• 16:50
  Speaker 1: When I say, hey, it's my mind. And I have
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: it in my subconscious. And I'm using that now to
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: talk to you. As you're asking me questions, my subconscious
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: is going and collecting from the non-conscious when I need
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: to answer your questions.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: Does that make sense?
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: So it's holding, it holds the thoughts. So thoughts are
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: actually experiences. And every experience is made of lots of information.
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: Like you're asking me, you read lots of stuff, you're
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: asking lots of questions.
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: It's not one word. It's not one thing.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: It's lots of things. So there's lots of words in
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: your questions. There's lots of questions. There's lots of words
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: that I'm saying. There's words you get them. So those
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: are all memories that make up the thought. So experiences
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: have got details. Those details of memories and details make
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: an experience. And those become thoughts made of memories. And
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: the mind does all that work. The non-conscious is doing
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: all of that. The non-conscious and the conscious mind are
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: doing all this building. Or the conscious mind we focus on.
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: So you chose to interview me. So your conscious mind,
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: you chose with your conscious mind. You chose to read up.
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: You chose to make the questions. That's your conscious mind.
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: But as you were doing that, your conscious mind was
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: drawing on information, your own experience, because you're both in
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: wellness and so on. Do you see what I'm saying?
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: So that came from the non-conscious into a subconscious and
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: you use those. Now, the conscious mind.
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: Is limited in its speed and capacity.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: The non-conscious is unlimited. And subconscious is also limited. We
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: can only have about seven to 10 things in there
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: at any one time. And because it's limited because your
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: conscious mind is limited. So your conscious mind is using
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: the subconscious. So therefore, it can't deal with millions of
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: trillions of things at once.
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: We can only have one conversation at once.
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: If all three of us were speaking at the same time,
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: no one would understand what on earth anyone's saying. No one,
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: listeners wouldn't be able to follow. So we speak one
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: at a time. And that's kind of the conscious mind's
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: at that level.
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: It speaks. It's one conversation at a time. So it
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: draws on.
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: You're speaking one conversation, but you're drawing on one thing
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: at a time. You're not going to draw 50 thoughts
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: out of your subconscious at the same time.
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: It's fast. It's going to move between different thoughts.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: That's why you said to me earlier on, there's so
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: many thoughts are coming up. So your non-conscious was placing
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: relevant stuff that my words triggered into the subconscious and
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: you pull those up as you need them.
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: So there's this slower process.
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: Slightly it's likely fostered very fast conscious subconscious non-conscious nighttime
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: only the non-conscious is going the other two go to
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: sleep and there's this cleaning on going up now here's
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: the key thing conscious mind is fantastic you think feel
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: choose you choose to focus but just think about this
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: if i choose to focus on really learning some great
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: information like i hope this information is helpful that people
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: really listen and they'll learn and they'll focus and they'll
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: read more and And the things you teach in your podcast,
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: you're teaching good stuff. You want people to choose to focus.
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: So that means that they're going to build great. Those
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: experiences that they choose to focus on, they're going to
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: build into good memories and that casts into thoughts but
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: i can also choose and that's your conscious mind working
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: with your non-conscious but my with my conscious mind i
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: can consciously choose to focus on i can never get.
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: Anything done and life's.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: So bad and it's everyone else's fault or look what's
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: happening to me again or just whatever You know, just
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: the bad things that happen to us or the negative
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: things that have happened. You can choose to focus on
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: whatever you want to focus on. Now, your non-conscious mind
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: will advise you and it advises you through using the subconscious.
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: So when you start focusing on really negative stuff, you
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: don't feel great. You can feel it in your body. Well,
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: that is the non-conscious saying, you know what, Caroline, don't
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: think about that. It's going to whatever, whatever.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: So what we need to do is.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: Learn to listen to the non-conscious mind. So the conscious
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: mind alone is like a toddler. You leave a toddler
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: to their own devices. I don't know if you've had
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: children or you've got children or you know a toddler.
• 20:43
  Speaker 4: I have a toddler now, so this is very relevant.
• 20:46
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: So you can imagine just letting your toddler run riot
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: in your home. You'll have chaos and your child will
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: be hurt.
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: And that's the conscious mind.
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: The conscious mind was never designed to work alone because
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: it's logical, but its logic is very paradoxical. Now, what
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: I mean is that your toddler will say, Oh, there's
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: a nice doggy. Let me go up to that doggy
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: and let me stick my hand in that doggy's mouth
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: or let me pull.
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: That doggy's tail.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: Now you know that that's X plus Y equals Z.
• 21:15
  Speaker 2: That's logical. There's a doggy. I like it.
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: It's cute.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: It's fluffy.
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: Let me go touch it. But you know that you
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: don't know that dog. It could be that dog could
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: turn on and bite your child or whatever or something.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: So you guide your child. Now that's a silly example
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: translated back into our adulthood.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: And our lives.
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: Now we get triggered by someone at work who says
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: something to us and our conscious mind logically says that
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: person hates me or that person thinks I'm stupid or
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: I'm not good enough, whatever. So that's logic, but it's
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: not good logic. And if I follow that logic and
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: I choose to focus on that logic, whatever I focus on,
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: I then push into the non-conscious mind and the non-conscious
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: mind is saying, don't grow this, rather grow You see
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: that that person is maybe having a bad day or
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: stop and question them. Or if they are, you can
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: put up a boundary. It's got all kinds of great advice.
• 22:08
  Speaker 1: And so the truth is this network. But we put
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: this network on, you start building. And I say network,
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: we literally build.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: Our conscious mind says, no, this person hates me. I'm
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: not good enough. Imposter syndrome, people pleasing, whatever happens.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: Whatever you're thinking becomes a network made out of proteins
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: in your brain. So you wire that on top of
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: the truth. And your non-conscious is saying, that's black prompting,
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: but it's not going to override. You have to choose
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: to find this and get it off and let the
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: truth come through. But we can get.
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: So stuck, whatever you think about the most gross, eventually
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: we can.
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: Layer upon layer upon layer upon layer and we can hide,
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: you know, beauty in the, seeking beauty in the tower.
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: You know, there's all the briars and stuff around it.
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: You know, you have to chop away all of that
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: and get out of the tower. We live like that
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: so often, stuck in a tower. And all of this
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: nonsense is keeping us stuck And it's not nonsense in
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: a negative sense. It's our life experiences that have built that.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: And so we've responded. We've had stress reactions and so on.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: So nonsense is maybe the wrong word, but it's kind
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: of dishonoring. So if we cancel that word and replace
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: it with toxic, so we build up all these toxic
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: memories into the thought that are not truth, then we
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: have to spend the time.
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: Breaking those down.
• 23:21
  Speaker 5: Is that why I was saying to Hayley prior to
• 23:24
  Speaker 5: us getting on with you, why is it in midlife?
• 23:29
  Speaker 4: That all of a sudden we have.
• 23:31
  Speaker 5: This like insecurity and self-sabotage and we don't have that self-confidence.
• 23:39
  Speaker 5: And is it because all the layers and we're not
• 23:41
  Speaker 5: letting the truth come out?
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: Is that what you're saying?
• 23:44
  Speaker 3: Well, and like doubting yourself and like almost coming through to.
• 23:48
  Speaker 4: To foster self-doubt.
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: So it's a great question.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: So in midlife, we have so many things happening, male, female,
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: there's a little bit of difference, a little bit of similarity,
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: but essentially we shift the way that we think about things.
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: So when we look at life, Up until midlife, we
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: go from gathering detail to concepts. When we hit midlife,
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: 50 and up, we are going, so 45, 50 and up,
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: we go in concept to detail. And we see both,
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: so you see it differently. And it should be like
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: that because it's now wisdom of age. You've gathered data,
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: you've accumulated knowledge, and then it shifts over. What often
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: happens is that we have not ever managed, well, not often,
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: what does happen, everyone. is if you don't manage your
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: mind is that you would have built a lot of these.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: I've got an image over here of a toxic thought.
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: There's a thought that's, I use this imagery of unhealthy
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: thought versus a healthy thought just to give people analogies
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: because thoughts that we build into our brain and our
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: body look like tree networks. They look a lot like
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: tree networks, probably closer to the AI. Networks that we've
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: got now is a more closer representation. So everything that
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: happens to you from this, we're not quite sure what
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: age in the womb, but pretty early in the womb, to,
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: as you go through life, build networks. So you're building
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: a combination of these. So if I don't deal with these,
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: I go into middle adulthood. I mean, midlife with these,
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: a lot of these. And these could be, these build
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: around our life experiences.
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: So if it's whatever, if you, all the things from.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: A child to every part of our life, we're going
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: to build responses because every part of our life is
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: processed by the mind to the brain. So it all
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: becomes part of you. But if you don't manage those,
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: they stay toxic. If you manage them, you still remember them,
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: but instead of them being this dominating thing, they shrink
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: and they become a reconceptualized version.
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: So you can't pull something out and throw it away.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: I wish we could, but you can't.
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: But what you can do is recognize what that pattern
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: is coming from, which is the thought. You can then
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: deconstruct to the root and see where did this start.
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: You can't change where that started because it's history, but
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: you can change what it looks like And therefore, how
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: it plays out into your future. Got a fancy science
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: name called retroactive causation. But essentially what it is, is
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: you can change those patterns. That's called directed neuroplasticity. And
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: then what that means is that this will shrink. You'll
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: regrow inside the same tree, but.
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: This becomes just a hint. Stop this anymore.
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: This is then what will dominate. And that requires work
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: and time. But if we don't, this is what we
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: go into adulthood with. So most of us are going
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: into midlife with a bunch of these, a bunch of
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: them looking like sort of half-half and some good ones
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: that become, this is wisdom and experience. I did this
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: and this is what I learned. And this is what
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: you want. You don't want this and you don't want
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: them kind of equal. You want, you know, sort of
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: standing side by side. This happens a lot where people
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: will say, this is how I should be. I know
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: I should be, I've got all the knowledge to be
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: like that, but this is what I'm living under. You know,
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: you want to, no, that's if they've got to do this.
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: And so, yeah, so the more we accumulate, this is
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: also going into old age. People can get, it doesn't,
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: age brings wisdom. But if you haven't dealt with your life, eventually,
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: because the brain is not, and body are not designed or.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: Structured for this. They are structured for this.
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: And the work of taking, we're all going to do this,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: but we're supposed to do this and turn them into this.
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: That's what mind management is.
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: If we don't do that, These eventually create the anxiety,
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: the depression, the breakdowns, the whatever extent. So anxiety and
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: depression are not mental illnesses. They are signals that these
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: have generated. And as they become bigger and bigger and bigger,
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: those signals become louder and louder and louder and incapacitating. Now,
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: this is battering the brain and the body. We're not
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: wired for this. We're wired for this and for this alone.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: And when that happens, I mean, these are amazing. This
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: means you've learned. Do you know what I'm saying when
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: I say that? Okay, so if you have learned and
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: done that, those are the wisdom things that you draw upon.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: And so we've got to.
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: Have the right balance.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: A lot of people are entering into midlife with that.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: So I work with a lot of people. I do
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: a lot of one-on-one work. I don't practice clinically anymore,
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: but I apply all of that into one-on-one work. And
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: a lot of the people in my courses and all
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: this stuff, we've got certifications now as well, where you
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: can learn how to do what I'm telling you with
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: your clients and so on. So what I do with
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: people is help them to recognize. I work with so
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: many people, midlife, men and women. And if you look
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: at it, you see what's, there's an insight that comes
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: with midlife, that concept insight.
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: And you suddenly see, my gosh, look what I've done.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: And it can be quite depressing because you see, I've
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: let that rule my life. And you know, the kids
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: are big or whatever. And you know, there's, you look
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: at life differently. And so you either can take that
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: and grow and the recognition there's something more I can
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: do with my life. I can use this or you
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: can let it crush you. You know, there's, There's two
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: options always to ask you. And at any point, if
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: you need a pressure, you can change it.
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: You always can change.
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: There's nothing that can't be changed, which is wonderful to know.
• 28:54
  Speaker 5: Is this part of your neuro cycle? I know you
• 28:57
  Speaker 5: have a five-step neuro cycle to help you rebuild. And
• 29:02
  Speaker 5: does that help you not get stuck and grow where
• 29:07
  Speaker 5: you need to?
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: Exactly. That's exactly what it is. So the neuro cycle
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: is a formula. It's not a therapy technique. It's not
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: a trick. It's not a.
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: tool in your i mean in this essence possibly you
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: could say it's a tool in your toolbox but it's
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: it's a formula and it's a formula for how we
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: as humans can stand back and observe ourself in the
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: moment and see okay these are the parts of my
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: life that i feel stuck whether it's midlife crisis whether
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: it's a teenager whatever and um it's how you it's
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: how you do that it's how do i stand back
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: and observe myself and then what do i do with
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: that what are the is the process neuroscientifically that I
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: need to go through to get this that I don't
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: like that's shrunk and just reconstructed and then reconstructed into
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: this and then stabilised? Because you can't just deconstruct and
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: reconstruct and not stabilize. And what I mean by that
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: is like if you plant a seed and don't water it,
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: you know, if it starts.
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: Growing, you get to shoot, you've got to keep watering
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: it to let it regrow.
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: It's the same thing here. If you don't, you know,
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: you can get to this point and say, okay, this
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: is what I want to do. But then if you
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: don't stabilize it and you just don't work on it
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: and turn it into a habit, then it'll just go
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: back to this or a version of this. And then
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: you don't apply it. And then that creates tremendous frustration.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: And it's like another layer that you're dealing with and
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: affects mindsets. So that's how people need to learn that
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: the neurocycle covers the timeframe. And that's what I've also
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: spent the last 40 years, 44 actually now, working out
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: how long does it take then? How long do I
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: take to once I know there's something I want to change?
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: And I'm aware because we're pretty good at that. So
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: as humans, we're quite insightful. And also this day and age,
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: you can't look at social media and all the books
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: on self-help and all the psychologists pouring out information on
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: social media. We were all very good at saying, I've
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: got this attachment style, I'm this, I'm that. Psychoanalyzing, tiktokification
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: of mental health, which has had positive and some terribly
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: negative effects. But people kind of then get stuck. Okay,
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: so now I understand, which is great. I have a label,
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: which to a certain extent gives me some kind of
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: understanding of But then what? You can't just breathe it away.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: You can't just meditate it away. You can't just become
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: aware of it. You can do all those things, and
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: that's what I do recommend you do, but you can't
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: stop there because it will just make it worse. And
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: the research shows if I just breathe, meditate, sure, there's
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: going to be physiological changes. I've shown that in my research. Sure,
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: when I become aware, at least I'm now going to
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: start doing something because I'm aware, but it's the doing
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: part consistently over time.
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: That is so important.
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: So the Neurocycle formula is based on the identification of
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: the pattern that you're showing up in, whatever thoughts, in
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: other words, what's keeping you stuck. And then imposter syndrome
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: at work or whatever. And then working to deconstruct down
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: to the thought that it's attached to through the signals
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: that it generates. So whatever the thought is, is going
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: to generate signals. I'm just not good enough as those
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: people at work. They're always going to be better than,
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: that's the thought, imposter, because your imposter syndrome keeps popping up.
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: A lot of that happens in midlife crisis too.
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: Now that's going to generate how you show up. So
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: you look at how you show up and then you
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: track it back. Where does this come from? First of all,
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: what does it look like? What does this look like
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: that's generating? What is inside it? What is all the
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: different parts? How is it showing up in my life?
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: And then why? And then that takes you down to here.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: Where did this come from? And then once you know that,
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: you have power. Because now I say, oh, okay. So
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: I'm not like that. I'm just not.
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: I'm not like that. I'm like that because of. very,
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: very big difference.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: So therefore, okay, there I can't change that because that's
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: other people, that's experiences, that's history that.
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: I can now reconstruct. I can decide how it's going
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: to change out.
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: So the formula follows that right from how I show up,
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: what are the signals to the thought, to the root,
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: then back up again.
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: And out to how I want to be.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: And that takes a daily process of at least 63 days.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: If you're talking about trauma, trauma patterns that have happened,
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: maybe abuse in childhood and marriage and being bullied, it's whatever,
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: any stage of our life we can develop, have trauma.
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: That's not going to go away in one cycle. It's
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: going to take multiple. So how long does it take?
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: Around about 63 days. That's what we're finding from our
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: research and from researchers around the world. We all agree
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: one cycle is around about 59 to 63 days. So
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: we've tracked this quite intensively and the neuropsycho is.
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: Based on that.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: So you need to do it at least every day
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: for around 15 minutes for 63 days. You can do
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: longer and you can do shorter, but I mean, it's recommended,
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: that's sort of the average timeframe. And if you just,
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: most people think, well, to change a habit or to
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: change a sort of problem takes 21 days.
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: We've heard about that for years, but that's a myth.
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: It was a doctor back in the 60s, a plastic
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: surgeon who saw his patients were taking more or less
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: 21 days to heal from the cuts from whatever plastic
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: surgery he did. Now that's correct because stem cells do
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: work in cycles of 21 days, but he applied that
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: to mine, so it became a myth. And so the
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: 21 days is literally a myth. Now stuff does happen
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: in 21 days, but you need three cycles. So what
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: will happen in the first 21 is you'll become aware
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: of your, this whatever thought is that's keeping you stuck.
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: You'll find, and then you'll find the details of that thought.
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: You'll find, be able to track back down to the
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: root or origin, whatever you want to call it.
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: And you'll be able to reconstruct.
• 34:34
  Speaker 1: But that's generally where you get to by day 21,
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: day 21, day 28, somewhere around there. And this is
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: where people often stop because they think, oh, got it.
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: But within the first 21 to 28 days, if you
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: stop there, this starts, it's not strong enough. So the
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: energy is not fixed enough in the mind connection. So
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: they start weakening. And then, so you've got to push through.
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: So the balance of the 42 days, another two cycles
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: of 21, stabilize and give you more insight to keep
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: this moving forward. So this is a lifestyle I'm talking about.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about a mind management lifestyle. So this is what,
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: you know, it's not just, oh, I've done the neurocycle.
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: When people say I've done the neurocycle, I'll say, how
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: many times?
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: I'll say once. I'll say, well, you've only then fixed
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: one thing.
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: You know, we've all got, there's not one of us
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: on this planet that doesn't have multiple issues that we're
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: dealing with. And we're going to be dealing with more.
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: And I think we need to learn how to control
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: our reactivity. We are triggered all the time in our society,
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: quicker than ever before in history because of technology.
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: And we need to.
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: Know how to manage that. And we've got things like AI,
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: which is amazing, but it's also creating, you know, it's
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: changing how people think about things and think, you know,
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: they don't think deeply enough.
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: And eventually it'll flip and it'll.
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: Teach people to think more deeply. But these are all
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: things that have changed how we are processing information. And
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: so we see that the current mental health crisis, that is,
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's worse than it's ever been, is worse
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: because we've dedicated, not we, but the field has focused predominantly,
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: the billions of dollars have focused predominantly on trying to
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: identify the biological source of the brain as the cause,
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: as I said in the beginning. So you're feeling anxious, okay,
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: let's see what's wrong in your brain.
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: No, that's the wrong source. The source is what's happening
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: in your life.
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: And get away from the word what's wrong, what's happening,
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: and then let's, you know, these things we do, yes,
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: these things that we do that are wrong, but we
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: have to come from a, the compassionate viewpoint. And there's
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: reasons why we do things wrong and all that unhealthy
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: stuff and so on. So we can't, it's our life.
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: Now you put your life, as I mentioned, your brain
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: is a host and your body is a host. So
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: it's wired for the healthy. So if I'm constantly doing
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: this to my brain and my body, well, eventually I
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: weaken my brain and my body. I'm battering my brain
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: and my body. And this is why we know from almost,
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: it's actually closer to 150 years of neuroscience. But when
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: we don't manage our mind, We stay in toxic stress
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: and that toxic stress builds those toxic thoughts, which then
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: damages the brain and the body. And over time, that
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: weakens the brain and the body. So therefore, research has
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: shown 95% of illnesses are lifestyle, mind related, which is crazy.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: But you think about it, you batter your brain and
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: your body, eventually they break. And so there's a lot
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: that is reversible. I'm not saying think positive thoughts and
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: you're going to have a healthy brain and body. That
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: is total toxic positivity. Happiness psychology that has got elements
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: that are fantastic, but a little bit misleading because we
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: need all of it. We need the happy, the sad,
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: the anxiety, the depression, all of its data. It's what
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: we do with that data and how we learn and
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: grow from the data. That creates a healthy brain and
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: a healthy body. So any damage we've done to our body,
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: how far down the line it is. Maybe you've been
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: so toxic your whole life that you've landed up with
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: really bad cardiovascular.
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: Issues or something.
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: And you could say, oh, well, now you're saying I've
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: got heart problems because I'm bad. Listen, we all got problems.
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: We've all battled and we all battled our body and
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: we've all got weaknesses. So if you don't deal with
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: our stuff, eventually it happens. Someone in grief, it's not
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: their fault that they're in grief because they lost a
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: loved one, but now they've maybe got high cholesterol. You
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: see a direct link. Someone who never had cholesterol problems,
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: they're grieving heavily.
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: And they suddenly get high cholesterol. Where's the link? Do
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: you think it's food-related?
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: No. It's just that it's so hard to process that.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: And if you don't learn, no, you can't eliminate grief,
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: but you've got to know how to process grief. Otherwise,
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: your brain and body take a battering. So what we
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: know from science is that every second of every single day,
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: you are making 800,000 to.
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: A million new cells.
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: And those cells make up your organs, which make up
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: your body. And the way that you are making your
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: mind is making cells. If you did, your mind's not there.
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: You're not making new cells. So the way that the
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: quality of those cells, and I've done research on this too,
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: the quality of those cells is dependent on how you're
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: managing your mind, your mindset in the moment, that intention,
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: what is going on in that thought. And these, if
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: you're living in this, the 800,000 to a million cells
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: you've just made are toxic, which means that there's a
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: toxic pattern in your brain and your body. Eventually, it's
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: accumulated over time.
• 39:12
  Speaker 5: So obviously, This is why things that go on in
• 39:17
  Speaker 5: our mind show up in our body, like pain, illness,
• 39:22
  Speaker 5: whatever it is.
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: So what are your best tips or ways to help
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: that mind management?
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: The first and most important thing, I've got a holding
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: a brain on my lap here. The first and most
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: important thing is to have this knowledge that we share now,
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: that your mind is dominant. You can't control the events
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: and circumstances of life. And we do try to control them,
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: but we can't. You can't control your child's choices.
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: You can guide them.
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: You can't control your love, your partner. You can't control
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: the government, politicians.
• 39:59
  Speaker 2: You can control, the only thing you can control is
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: yourself and your own reactions.
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: So that's really important to recognize because there's so much
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: that goes into, like in parenting, there's so much pressure
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: in parents to control. create this perfect environment and all
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: these different philosophies. And you can't control your child. You
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: can just, you know, learn as much as you can
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: and recognize their individuality. So therefore, the first and most
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: important thing, you cannot control the events and circumstances of
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: your life, but you can control your reactions.
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: That's mind management.
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: So the key thing is I need to understand my
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: mind is my superpower. My ability to choose what I
• 40:37
  Speaker 1: focus on and focus on that is my conscious mind.
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: When I really listen deeply and get my conscious mind
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: to listen to the non-conscious, the parent guiding the toddler,
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: when I choose to, and how do I do that?
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: I stand back, I train myself to observe myself in
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: the moment. That's the quickest way. So in any one moment,
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: like right now, as you're listening to me, you can
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: observe how you are thinking and reacting. Just me having
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: said that to change your perspective of yourself. You're not
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: just being part of this interview. You're actually watching yourself
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: be part of this interview. That's a very important skill
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: that we have, but we.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: Don't use it.
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: That's one of the first things to observe yourself. Watch
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: in every moment of every day how you are functioning.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: This may sound very onerous.
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: It's not.
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: Once you've done it, once you've got the hang of it,
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: you automatically do it. And that's then, once you've created
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: that awareness, you've then opened the door to the conscious
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: mind working with the non-conscious, the parent listening to the child,
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: the toddler listening to the parent, not the other way
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: around in terms of guidance. And then from there, it's
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: a matter of observing, from that observing, okay, I'm showing
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: up like this in my relationship. I'm showing up like
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: this at work. I'm waking up in the morning with
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: this constant heaviness or I've got this hovering anxiety. So
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: you start identifying the top 10 maybe areas that you
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: know are restricting you in this moment. Whatever, maybe it's
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: eating disorders. Maybe it's shopping addiction. Maybe it's whatever.
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: Those are broad words.
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: So once you've got broad categories, you need to get specific.
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: And so then you put those in order in the
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: top 10, and then you start deciding, okay, I'm going
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: to dedicate the next 63 days, and I'm going to
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: work through one at a time. And as you work
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: through one, you may see in those top 10, some
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: are linked, it may drop down to five, but that's
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: five cycles of 63 days. And then as those come up,
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: you'll see, oh, I've got to work on these. This
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: is the lifestyle thing. And the neuro cycle's got different elements.
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: I mean, we can talk about what those are if
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: you want.
• 42:30
  Speaker 3: I'm like, what book do I start with? Learn more
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: out of the 19. Where do I start with that?
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: That's a great question. Let me show you where I
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: would recommend you start. What is your demographic again? Just
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: remind me.
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: Is it mainly middle-aged parenting?
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: Women 35 to 60, 65.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: Kids, grandkids, transition.
• 42:55
  Speaker 4: All right.
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: So then I would recommend the first place to start
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: is this book, Cleaning Up Your Mental Maze. And then
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: I'd also recommend my app. I have an app called
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: The Neurocycle. It's available wherever you buy apps, and there's
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: a web version. So this has got the science.
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: You can read this in chunks.
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: I explained to you how to read it, but it's
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: got everything that I've just said in there. Plus, it's
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: got how to do the neurocycle, and there's lots of examples. Now,
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: the app is literally me giving you therapy, where you
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: literally walk through. So there's videos explaining the science in
• 43:23
  Speaker 1: little bite-sized chunks, and then I walk you through the
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: five steps, and you follow the system. And there's also,
• 43:29
  Speaker 1: in the app, there's also these little mini-neurocycles. So let's
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: say that you're at work and someone is just so
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: difficult and you just don't know how to calm down
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: in that moment. You can go and select a mini-neurocycle
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: and just listen to that. Maybe you just need to decompress.
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: I've got lots of different ways of doing decompression, et cetera,
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: et cetera. And then there's also a section in there
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: for parents. So there's how to help with child. So
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: if you've got parents, how to help with child cleanup
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: in Necromix. They learn by watching you.
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: This is a great tool.
• 43:58
  Speaker 4: Getting this one immediately also.
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: We have a whole kit thing to spread.
• 44:03
  Speaker 2: We have a coloring book and we have a brain toy,
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: which is for the kids. So we have that little
• 44:08
  Speaker 2: brainy toy.
• 44:09
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's cute.
• 44:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, cute. And brainy is throughout the book. So you'll
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: see this.
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: So with the children's book, you can literally show them
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: the pictures.
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: Brainy is all over the book.
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 44:20
  Speaker 2: So every concept.
• 44:21
  Speaker 1: So everything then is simplified in this. So a lot
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: of adults love this book because it's so simple. It
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: explains the process, but it's geared towards 2 to 12-year-olds,
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: parents or teachers or whatever, grandparents with 2 to 12-year-old children.
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: Then Brandy goes with it.
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: There's also a coloring book. It's a whole kit for parents.
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: So that's something parents, grandparents, teachers, et cetera. So that's
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: where I would start. I would start with these books,
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: the app. If you've got children, the whole kits, they're
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: all available on our website, and books are available wherever
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: books are sold. But the kits, the children's kit, that's
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: only available on our website, the book.
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: And coloring book. I've got a coloring book here. I've
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: ignored it. It's somewhere there.
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: This is my most recent book, Help in a Hurry.
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: And this takes you through the 18 top scenarios that
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: people battle.
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: So we've done surveys and research.
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: And there's 16 top areas that if you're thinking, where
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: do I even start with a toxic thought? This is
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: a great place to start. And it works hand in
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: hand with these. So, for example, help them under pressure.
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: That's one of the top things that we came up
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: number one. I mean, people say, what are the top
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: things that you are fighting with? Help them under pressure
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: came up most. And under that, we've got seven categories,
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: which is very interesting. Things like if people are so,
• 45:30
  Speaker 1: because of our productivity, hustle culture, you know, all that
• 45:33
  Speaker 1: sort of thing that I know you guys also speak
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: about in what's happening around us, is people are very
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: prone to saying, I didn't get X done. And I'll
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: get so, that's a pressure point because instead of saying,
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: I didn't, I got this done, Therefore, I didn't get
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: X done and they become stuck in that.
• 45:54
  Speaker 2: So this book helps with things like that.
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: It helps you identify the area and then gives you
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: information on that plus techniques that you just use alongside
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: the neuroscience. So it kind of gives you the meat
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: for the neuroscience.
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: To not spiral.
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: To not spiral.
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: Yes, to recognize, am I doing that or am I doing,
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: you know, what kind of pressure points am I putting
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: on myself?
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: Whatever. It gives you a breakdown.
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: These other areas, I mean, things like black and white thinking.
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: Which is it? huge in this day and age. And
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: it's very, very often very in the religious environments.
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: There's only this or that way. And even this in
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: the wellness industry is very guilty of this too. You've
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: got to do it this way. You've got to take
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: this supplement. You've got to have this morning routine. And
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: it's not like that because, yes, we all need to supplement,
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: eat healthy. And listen, I teach on that.
• 46:41
  Speaker 2: I agree.
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: But it's not the same for everyone. There isn't a
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: fixed thing. And there's also we're now in a stage
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: where people are so under pressure to to do this
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: wellness routine that they're actually getting worse anxiety because there's
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: too many things that you've got to find work for you.
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: Only one thing works for you, and that's to do
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: whatever it is, then do that.
• 46:59
  Speaker 2: So that's really important.
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: So, you know, the and, or type thinking, I'm tired
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: all the time, another huge one. My intrusive thoughts, I
• 47:08
  Speaker 1: just won't quit. So this is great to help you
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: find the category of the thought. And then from there
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: to hone it down to the specific thought within that.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: So I'm depressed is the big picture. I'm under pressure
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: because every single night I go to bed and I say,
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: I didn't get this done. And it's freaking me out.
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: I don't sleep well. I'm just making something up. And
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: then the next day it carries over. And then that
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: will bring up, you know, I didn't get it. It
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: becomes very viral. It's a very, very difficult regret cycle.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: People spend literally hours of their time replaying scenarios from five, six, seven,
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: eight days ago. We've done some, showed some with some
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: research and with clients and so on. You can have
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: something happen. And in post, you can think, oh my gosh,
• 47:50
  Speaker 1: this would have been so much better if I did
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: it like this. And then you replay that what didn't
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: happen multiple times over and over and over and over
• 47:59
  Speaker 1: and over again. Now, the more you think about something,
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: because you choose with your conscious mind to do that replay,
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: and now you've built it up. So now you're just
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: creating this. And the truth is that, hey, you know,
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: it didn't happen. So what can I learn from this?
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: And what do I get out of this?
• 48:13
  Speaker 2: How do I move forward? You don't spend any time
• 48:14
  Speaker 2: on that. You get stuck in this. And that really
• 48:17
  Speaker 2: cripples people.
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: So this book is great to find your category and
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: then to use this book or the app or both
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: or whatever you can afford to then actually break down,
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: go to the specifics of the category and then break
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: that down. So not just I am in a regret
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: cycle as the category.
• 48:33
  Speaker 2: What is the regret? I'm regretting not saying this.
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: At work and it's been a month now and I'm
• 48:39
  Speaker 1: still stuck.
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: Wishing that that happened.
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: And every single thing that's happened since then is now
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: because of that, which is ridiculous. That's a flood response
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: where everything's got completely distorted. So until you break that,
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: you're going to keep doing that. And that creates so
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: much anxiety. You know, and eventually it just builds. I mean,
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: I'm exaggerating, but that's probably not an exaggeration.
• 48:59
  Speaker 4: I was just going to say, this is not an exaggeration.
• 49:04
  Speaker 3: I want to be in your head where it's probably...
• 49:08
  Speaker 3: All of the systems are set up and I'm here like, okay,
• 49:12
  Speaker 3: how do I learn more about all of the conscious, non-conscious, subconscious,
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: and all of these other tools to kind of head
• 49:22
  Speaker 3: in a different direction. And I think midlife is a
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: great point to re look at a lot of our
• 49:31
  Speaker 3: beliefs and our systems and our patterns. And I like
• 49:35
  Speaker 3: something that you posted on, uh, social, I took a
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: screenshot of it. Um, if you haven't felt like yourself lately,
• 49:43
  Speaker 3: here's a reframe worth trying on that unfamiliar feeling might
• 49:47
  Speaker 3: not always be a warning sign. It might be growth
• 49:49
  Speaker 3: mid process before it has a name yet. Growth rarely
• 49:52
  Speaker 3: feels like an upgrade while it's happening.
• 49:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:56
  Speaker 3: That's where I feel like I've been in the last
• 49:58
  Speaker 3: two years.
• 49:59
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah. That's growth. And that's the thing.
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: We're in a society with this very physicalist, biomedical type
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: model that the minute you feel discomfort, there's something wrong.
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: That's what we automatically think. Meanwhile, if you just sit
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: back and do nothing for a moment, Koreans are incredible
• 50:16
  Speaker 1: at having competitions to see who can do nothing for
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: the longest. What a great philosophy, because in that nothingness,
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: you cut off conscious minds, very, very distractible. You cut
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: off the distractibility of the conscious mind and you start
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: getting your conscious mind to tune into the non-conscious. And
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: in that, you then start finding the source of your
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: wisdom because everything you need is in you, but you
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: can't hear it with the noise. And then you start seeing, okay,
• 50:43
  Speaker 1: I'm at this point in my life. It's really hard
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: to make this change, but I'm actually growing because I
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: wasn't there. But you can't think like that when you're
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: so stuck in the busyness of life and I've got
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: to do this to do this and I've got to
• 50:54
  Speaker 1: take this and I've got to do that and That's
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: why with a neurocycle, you might be saying, well, there's
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: one more thing to do.
• 50:59
  Speaker 2: Once you've mastered it, it's a lifestyle. It's so automatic.
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: And I've worked with millions of millions. And once you've
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: got this flow, it's a formula. You put your life
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: into that. It just comes like this. It just means
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: that you, instead of just reacting, you put everything through
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: a system and that system reorders it and taps into the,
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: gets you into that space where you can then manage
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: this as opposed to seeing, oh, this is, This is bad.
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: I'm stuck. Oh no, it's not.
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: I'm not stuck.
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: I'm in the process of growth. Okay. This is hard.
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: It doesn't feel good, but you look where I was.
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: You can't see that when you're stuck. So you want
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: to always get into that deeply. So yeah, I like
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: that post. A lot of it goes into my posts.
• 51:42
  Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I screenshotted a whole, a lot of them
• 51:46
  Speaker 3: just to bring up, but As we're wrapping this up,
• 51:49
  Speaker 3: if listeners walk away from this conversation remembering just one
• 51:54
  Speaker 3: empowering truth about what you've talked about, about their minds,
• 51:58
  Speaker 3: what would you want it to be?
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: Well, you asked about the different levels of mind, how
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: you can learn more. This book, I really explain it
• 52:05
  Speaker 1: very simplistically. I've also got a podcast.
• 52:07
  Speaker 2: I'm sure you're familiar. And I teach a lot about it.
• 52:09
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah.
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: And I've got certification programs. So people are coaches or therapists.
• 52:15
  Speaker 1: And once you get into this and use it in
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: their practices, they can do the certification track. So that's
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: where people can get more, and obviously social media. In
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: terms of what I'd like to take away is understand
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: that your mind is your superpower. It is, and mind
• 52:29
  Speaker 1: is not the brain. If you get that, it changes
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: your perspective because now you're in control. It's not this
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: elusive brain that, oh my gosh, brain science, neurosurgery, neuroscience.
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: It's like this elusive, unattainable goal.
• 52:42
  Speaker 2: No, not at all.
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: Your brain is a host. You control your brain. Your
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: brain does not drive you. Sure, when it's battered and whatever,
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: and you're feeling awful, your body sensations. But if you
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: know that, right, my brain and my body are going
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: through this because of this, and this is the healing
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: I need to do. So maybe I need to take
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: some time to do some infrared saunas and change this
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: and do that and look after myself and treat myself
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: to this, whatever it is that you need to do.
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: But you can't make those decisions properly unless you realize
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: you're in control. And so many people, I think one
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: of the top questions we get is that I just
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: feel that everything is just so out of control.
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: There's just so much going on, so much chaos. Where
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: can you even begin?
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: And you begin by knowing that that's all external, that
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: internally you or your mind is the thing that's in control.
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: Your mind is just using your brain and your body
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: and all those sensations you feel, if you listen, they're signals.
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: They're not destinies. They're signals telling you, hey, listen, this
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: is pay attention.
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: This is data.
• 53:46
  Speaker 1: And if you look at it like that, instead of
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: being scared and running away from those emotions, the sensations
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: in your body, the perspectives that you have, those thoughts
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: that are coming up, intrusive thoughts are your new best friend.
• 53:56
  Speaker 1: Because if you look at them in the face, you'll
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: find data. And I remember telling this to Mel Robbins
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: and she literally threw something across the room and she said, no,
• 54:04
  Speaker 1: I hate these intrusive thoughts. And then when I explained
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: what it was, you can actually listen to that podcast.
• 54:10
  Speaker 2: She said, I get it.
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: Because intrusive thoughts are data. If you have an intrusive thought,
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: it's your non-conscious mind telling you to pay attention to something.
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: It's one of these coming up that really is destructive.
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: And if you look at it, it'll turn into data.
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: But that's mind work. And that's why I say, mind.
• 54:24
  Speaker 2: Is the superpower.
• 54:26
  Speaker 1: You're not controlled by these intrusive thoughts. You're not controlled
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: by the sensations in your body.
• 54:30
  Speaker 2: All of those are simply signals. The control is in
• 54:34
  Speaker 2: your mind.
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: So look at those as signals and data, and then
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: you can do the changing in the way that you want.
• 54:41
  Speaker 3: We're going to have a six-month recap and come back
• 54:45
  Speaker 3: and tell you everything.
• 54:47
  Speaker 2: I love that. I love that.
• 54:49
  Speaker 3: Where we are and what we've changed. Thank you, Caroline.
• 54:52
  Speaker 3: Thank you for joining us today.
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: My pleasure.
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: Thank you for having me on and your questions were lovely.
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: And thank you for giving me so much time to
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: explain things. Can I say one more thing there? There's
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: so much about nervous system regulation, like so much all
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: over the place, social nervous system regulation, nervous system. It's
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: become such a buzzword. I want people to, it makes
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: you feel like, well, my nervous system runs the show.
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: Nervous system is part of the brain. Your brain and
• 55:19
  Speaker 1: body don't run the show. What your nervous system is,
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: is part of the brain and body network. And it's
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: basically just holding what you've put in. So it's simply responding.
• 55:28
  Speaker 1: So your brain and body are responding. So instead of
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: being scared of nervous and thinking, oh, I'm dysregulated, all
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: these words, buzzwords that are going around, rather see that
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: as a signal.
• 55:38
  Speaker 2: It's talking to me.
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: It's my non-conscious telling me something that you stand back,
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: observe and pay attention. And things like, oh, my amygdala
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: is now in a.
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: Fear circuit and it's stuck.
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: Those words are scary because people don't really understand what
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: they are. So anything that sounds nervous-y, nervous system, brainified,
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: don't let it throw you and think, okay, you're controlled.
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: Remember that those are just posts. They are code.
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: That's where your mind codes. So see them as signals
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: and signals that you can control. Just a little tip.
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's empowering. Then you can take the fear all
• 56:10
  Speaker 3: out of it and... not give it control over you
• 56:14
  Speaker 3: and what you think.
• 56:16
  Speaker 2: Exactly.
• 56:16
  Speaker 3: Well, so your, your social media is Dr. Caroline Leaf.
• 56:21
  Speaker 2: Caroline Leaf. And I'm on all the platforms.
• 56:24
  Speaker 4: Great.
• 56:25
  Speaker 3: Well, we will be looking you up and that book
• 56:27
  Speaker 3: that you've shown. And for those that are not watching
• 56:30
  Speaker 3: the video version here is clean up your mental mess.
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: And then the children's ones, how to help your child
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: clean up the mental mess.
• 56:39
  Speaker 4: I love it.
• 56:40
  Speaker 3: I'm grabbing Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess. Get to a bookstore.
• 56:46
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 56:47
  Speaker 3: Well, thanks so much, Caroline.
• 56:48
  Speaker 2: My pleasure.
• 56:50
  Speaker 1: But my next book coming out on stress, The Truth
• 56:52
  Speaker 1: About Stress, there's so much more information about that. That's
• 56:55
  Speaker 1: terrified people. They will think I'm stressed, I'm going to die.
• 56:58
  Speaker 2: So that's the next one that's coming out on.
• 57:00
  Speaker 4: When is it launching?
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: Next year.
• 57:02
  Speaker 1: Next year, September. So there's still a while. It's still
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: a while. But anyway, there's so much in here that
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: keeps people busy.
• 57:09
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 57:09
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 57:10
  Speaker 3: Well, we'll catch up on those and be ready in
• 57:13
  Speaker 3: 2027 for the new one.
• 57:14
  Speaker 4: Sounds wonderful.
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: Well, thank you so much.
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: I loved your questions and your insights and thank you
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: for having me on.
• 57:20
  Speaker 3: Thank you for joining us. Thanks for listening, everyone.
• 57:23
  Speaker 5: If you enjoyed this episode, please consider giving us a
• 57:26
  Speaker 5: five-star rating and sharing the BodyPod with your friends.