Latest / The Christian Homemaking Podcast: Simply Convivial with Mystie Winckler / My Non-Negotiable Habits That Protect My Sanity as a Homeschooling Mom of 5

Transcript

My Non-Negotiable Habits That Protect My Sanity as a Homeschooling Mom of 5 · The Christian Homemaking Podcast: Simply Convivial with Mystie Winckler

• 0:01
  Speaker: By 4:00 PM, my brain was done.
• 0:04
  I wasn't physically exhausted, but I was mentally drowning.
• 0:11
  Dinner, laundry, homeschooling, errands, the text I forgot to answer,
• 0:16
  the paper I was supposed to sign Why did I come into this room again?
• 0:22
  It felt like my brain was running the operating system for the entire family.
• 0:29
  Kind of it was.
• 0:30
  But here's what surprised me.
• 0:33
  I didn't actually have too much to do, even though that's what it felt like.
• 0:38
  I was just trying to keep it all in my head.
• 0:42
  But when I stopped using my brain as a storage unit, everything changed.
• 0:49
  Today, I'm gonna show you the three ridiculously simple habits that gave
• 0:54
  me back so much mental space, allowing me to be present with my family and
• 1:02
  stay in control of the home atmosphere
• 1:06
  These three habits require no fancy planner, no color-coded binders, no
• 1:13
  waking up an hour before the kids get up.
• 1:16
  All you need is an index card, a weekly review, and a 10-minute family reset.
• 1:23
  These three habits keep my home running without forcing me to carry
• 1:29
  every responsibility and every detail in my head all day long.
• 1:34
  So if you have ever felt mentally behind before lunch, forgotten five
• 1:40
  things before dinner, or laid in bed trying to remember what it was you
• 1:46
  forgot, then this then the re- uh, then these three habits are for you
• 1:55
  Hi, I'm Misty Winkler, and this is the Christian homemaking
• 1:59
  podcast, Simply Convivial.
• 2:01
  Convivial means enjoying life together, and that's what we want to be happening
• 2:08
  in our homes as Christian moms, but it is so easy to lose the plot.
• 2:14
  I wanna help you build a home life that you love, rooted in the Gospel.
• 2:20
  I've been married for 25 years.
• 2:23
  My husband and I have five kids, two grandkids.
• 2:26
  We homeschool, and we live in Idaho.
• 2:29
  I'm author of the book Home Is for Hospitality: Why Your
• 2:33
  Home and Homemaking Matter.
• 2:36
  My mission is to equip Christian women to become capable,
• 2:40
  confident, cheerful homemakers.
• 2:43
  If that's you, then you are going to need these three home habits pronto.
• 2:49
  So grab a basket of laundry to fold, and let's dig in
• 2:54
  So the first habit that you need is an index card, a fresh one every day.
• 3:02
  You're gonna use this index card to do two things.
• 3:06
  You're gonna write down your top three things for the day on one side, and
• 3:12
  then the other side is going to hold whatever notes to self you need that day.
• 3:18
  Write it down right away.
• 3:21
  That is one of my mottos
• 3:23
  You see, the thing is you do not wanna use your brain to keep track of anything.
• 3:31
  So with this index card, where you're going to write the date, and you're
• 3:36
  gonna write your top three things, and then you're gonna have a place
• 3:40
  to keep track of notes to self.
• 3:44
  This puts your priorities in front of your face, and then you're able
• 3:49
  to also have a place to write things down right away, and it can be messy.
• 3:56
  Real life is messy, and your notes to self and your to-do list can
• 4:00
  be messy because you're just gonna toss this at the end of the day.
• 4:05
  You're gonna write a new one for tomorrow.
• 4:07
  Any of the notes to self on the back that apply tomorrow or you need to continue
• 4:12
  to remember, you write it down again.
• 4:14
  And in the process of writing it down, it also sticks in your mind better.
• 4:20
  But also, you don't have that mental load because your mind
• 4:25
  doesn't have to keep track of it.
• 4:26
  The paper keeps track of it, so the burden of remembering the right thing
• 4:32
  at the right moment is not on you.
• 4:36
  It's on your daily card.
• 4:38
  I'll put a link to my best series all about using an index card as a
• 4:44
  planner in the description below.
• 4:47
  Because this one habit alone, keeping an index card planner,
• 4:52
  could be the game changer for you.
• 4:55
  All right.
• 4:56
  So how do you know what these priorities are that need to go on
• 5:01
  your daily card every week, every day?
• 5:06
  Well, you figure it out during your weekly review.
• 5:10
  You make a fresh card every day.
• 5:12
  You don't make these up ahead of time because mom life changes fast enough that
• 5:17
  you need a whole new to-do list every day.
• 5:20
  But once a week, for just 30 minutes, you're going to
• 5:24
  recalibrate your expectations and, more importantly, your calendar.
• 5:30
  So a weekly review is where you will look at your calendar
• 5:34
  and figure out what's going on.
• 5:36
  You mentally prepare.
• 5:38
  You update your calendar and make sure that it really is up to date.
• 5:43
  You know what's on your plate because you're looking at the coming week,
• 5:48
  you're looking a little bit ahead, and you're spending a little bit
• 5:52
  of time thinking about how to go about your responsibilities well.
• 5:58
  I actually have a whole masterclass on the weekly review for moms, and one of
• 6:03
  the things that ladies have said is so helpful is to have the 15 or 30-minute
• 6:09
  video, which is included in this course, which is included in the course.
• 6:14
  I walk through, step by step, a 15-minute version and a 30-minute
• 6:19
  version of a weekly review for moms.
• 6:22
  I'm doing it.
• 6:23
  I have what you're supposed to be doing up on the video screen, along with
• 6:27
  myself doing it, and this acts like a timer, prompting you to move on and
• 6:33
  preventing you from being distracted
• 6:37
  You can find a link to that masterclass in the description of this episode.
• 6:42
  The weekly review is where
• 6:46
  You recognize where you're at in life right now.
• 6:50
  You see what's on the calendar.
• 6:52
  You make a smarter meal plan.
• 6:55
  You recognize that the grocery list has to be updated based on that meal plan.
• 7:01
  And you're kind of just thinking through how the week will flow.
• 7:04
  You're making a strategy.
• 7:06
  You've given it some thought, so when the days roll around,
• 7:10
  you're not caught off guard.
• 7:12
  You're not scrambling.
• 7:14
  And it doesn't take two hours.
• 7:16
  It doesn't mean you get everything all clear and set and pristine and perfect.
• 7:22
  It is a 30-minute strategy session with yourself and your calendar.
• 7:28
  That can actually happen, and it makes a huge difference So that is
• 7:34
  habit number two, a weekly review
• 7:37
  Habit number three is every afternoon, the whole family spends 10 minutes together
• 7:47
  tidying up the public areas of the house.
• 7:51
  I have a friend who calls this a 10-minute tidy, which is a great
• 7:55
  name because it's alliterative.
• 7:57
  But we call it EHAP, which stands for Everything Has A Place.
• 8:04
  And the implication is that you're gonna put things in their place.
• 8:07
  You're not just gonna move the things to a new place.
• 8:10
  You're going to pick up things that are not in their place
• 8:14
  and put them in their place.
• 8:16
  That's what tidying up really means.
• 8:20
  And the key to make EHAP work is that mom and all the kids are doing it together.
• 8:29
  Same room, same goal, same mission, working together.
• 8:35
  The kids need that kind of coaching, and this builds a convivial team
• 8:40
  atmosphere even during a cleanup time.
• 8:44
  One of the things we liked to do when all the kids were little
• 8:48
  was to have a 10-minute playlist.
• 8:51
  The song that started where everyone knew to come to mom, come report
• 8:56
  to the living room to start EHAP
• 8:58
  Was the Beatles' Help.
• 9:01
  Like, I need somebody, help.
• 9:04
  That was a cue that it was time to EHAP.
• 9:08
  And then the song, the playlist was 10-minute long, 10 minutes long.
• 9:13
  But when it was over, we were done.
• 9:15
  No matter how much we did or did not do, everyone was gonna work all together
• 9:21
  on the same team for 10 minutes.
• 9:24
  You will be astonished what can happen in 10 minutes.
• 9:28
  Although some days it might not be enough to get it to the state that you would like
• 9:34
  everything to be, you will keep everyone on board for the long term because
• 9:40
  they're not there until Mom is happy.
• 9:42
  They're there for 10 minutes.
• 9:44
  The house will get messy.
• 9:46
  Your job is not to keep the house looking like no one lives
• 9:50
  there, but to reset the stage.
• 9:53
  Your home is a stage, and you're resetting it it's time for a scene change, and
• 9:58
  you need your stage crew to pitch in.
• 10:01
  This is an afternoon EHAP.
• 10:04
  I have an article and a free guide all about this EHAP habit.
• 10:09
  You can grab that in the description of this episode as well,
• 10:13
  so these are the three habits that make all the difference.
• 10:18
  A daily index card, a weekly review, and a daily afternoon EHAP altogether.
• 10:25
  But actually, there's a fourth secret habit, and that habit is smiling.
• 10:33
  You can have a daily card, you can do a weekly review, you can make all
• 10:39
  the kids clean up every afternoon, and still be tearing down your
• 10:44
  house instead of building it up.
• 10:47
  If you are working these habits with an attitude of manipulative, selfish
• 10:53
  control instead of generous, cheerful gratitude for the life that God has
• 10:59
  given you, then you are tearing down your home instead of building it up.
• 11:04
  Smiling is how we change the atmosphere of our homes and make it convivial.
• 11:11
  So I have a free three-day email mini course that I call Smile and Start.
• 11:18
  This mini course will give you a quick, will give you three quick
• 11:22
  tangible actions that you can take to smile more and get more done at home
• 11:27
  cheerfully without stress or overwhelm.
• 11:31
  Sign up for that at simplyconvivial.com/smile.
• 11:34
  Or you can find the link in the description, simplyconvivial.com/smile
• 11:40
  Because I wanna help you repent, rejoice, repeat