Latest / Reality TV Cringe / 122: Vanderpump Rules Rundown / 90 Day Fiance - From This Day Forward (S10E14)

Transcript

122: Vanderpump Rules Rundown / 90 Day Fiance - From This Day Forward (S10E14) · Reality TV Cringe

• 0:09
  Hello, and welcome to Reality TV Cringe. I am one of your hosts
• 0:15
  and I'm here with my real tight home girl of Beatrice. How you doing
• 0:19
  tonight, Beatrice? Everybody, I'm ready to party. I'm ready to party
• 0:23
  too. Yeah, because we're gonna be talking in this podcast about ninety day
• 0:28
  fiance making the most out of it yep. And then we're going to be
• 0:33
  getting into the cast of characters of vander Pump Rules because of course that starts
• 0:39
  next Tuesday. Nay, I know, bitch, I'm excited for it.
• 0:42
  Actually, I'm excited too. So we're gonna go over the cast involved with
• 0:46
  vander Pump Rules. You're gonna be talking about astrological signs, which I know
• 0:50
  make half of you grown because you think it's bullshit, and that's fine.
• 0:53
  It probably is, but we like to talk about it. Yeah, And
• 0:56
  then I'm going to give you the lowdown on who these people are and what
• 0:58
  is going on with the French all right. Before we get into any of
• 1:03
  that, I just want to remind you please hide your wife and hid your
• 1:06
  kids up. Warning you, yeah, this is a politically incorrect podcast.
• 1:11
  We are not here to massage your feelings and validate your opinions. We're just
• 1:15
  here to get into the trash and so if you're down with that, welcome
• 1:19
  to the dumpster. Yes, and if you are down with us, go
• 1:23
  follow us on Instagram at Reality tv Cringe and join us on Patreon, Patreon,
• 1:26
  dot com, slosh Reality TV Grunge. We have so much bonus content
• 1:32
  up on their bonus podcast episodes, bonus video reactions, uncensored versions of these
• 1:37
  podcast episodes. It's lit over there, it is. And if you are
• 1:41
  watching on YouTube, please don't forget to like and comment and share and subscribe.
• 1:46
  Every single thing that you do, every click, every comment helps us
• 1:49
  to grow the community, and we thank you in advance. Thank you so
• 1:55
  much. Okay, well, before you start us off on ninety dance,
• 2:00
  I just have to tell you I'm reading so much smart God. She texted
• 2:05
  me today being like it's three pm and she's like, I haven't even watched
• 2:08
  ninety Fiance because she's been in bed all day reading. Poor God. Here's
• 2:13
  the thing. In December, I was thinking to myself self, you're dumb.
• 2:17
  All you do is watch reality television, Like where's the literature, you
• 2:22
  know, where is the brain bettering content like feeds your soul in your brain.
• 2:27
  Yeah, and so I'm like, I'm gonna start reading. And so
• 2:30
  my entree into reading was romance. I love romance, very romantic person.
• 2:37
  Actually you are you wear a sap. And so I have read in the
• 2:40
  last less than thirty days, I've read thirteen books. Oh my god,
• 2:45
  and they all have sex scenes. Ye good Reads. Oh yeah, I'm
• 2:50
  up on Goodreads, honey, and I'm just like, woo, you bet
• 2:52
  a family. The book I read, the book I read yesterday was to
• 2:58
  Die For And then the book that I read today, oh, to be
• 3:02
  young Again. I just fall in love with somebody and feel all those butterflies
• 3:07
  and COUCHI tingle. Do you know what I'm saying? And then the grand
• 3:10
  misunderstanding where you have to run away and then he has to chase you.
• 3:15
  Oh god, that is what I've been doing with my time in this winter.
• 3:17
  And I've been just enjoying myself so much. Yeah, and riching your
• 3:22
  brain with all of the vocabulary, our bits and stuff. Yes, So
• 3:25
  it's helpful. It's part of like providing a better podcast. Sure, and
• 3:30
  I'm trying to get you on board so you can read some books too.
• 3:32
  But like they are men and women, And I know you're a big holy
• 3:38
  I mean I can do man and women. I just can't sexy to you.
• 3:40
  Yeah, yeah, really like gets your Yeah right, yeah it's cool.
• 3:44
  But I mean I don't want to read verbiage that's like dewey folds,
• 3:49
  like in Her dewey Folds and her see you next Tuesday, Like I don't
• 3:53
  want to read that. No, then you don't want to read any of
• 3:55
  these books because it's all about the glistening of it all. It's all about
• 4:00
  the big pillar of his cock and oh to die for. And I'm like,
• 4:09
  are you away, husband, because Mama's got something for you. Yeah,
• 4:13
  your father in law's a happy one. You need to read more anyway.
• 4:16
  You don't read anything. I know, I really don't about dumb.
• 4:21
  Are you literate barely? Yeah? You need to be literate. This is
• 4:25
  a great gateway into actually reading good books. All these are Yeah. I
• 4:32
  know you keep talking about it. We'll hook you up. If you're okay
• 4:34
  with heterosexical sex scenes. I can deal with it. I can hang.
• 4:39
  I got your number, I got something for you. All right, all
• 4:42
  right, well let's get into I guess we're gonna talk Vander Pump rules first.
• 4:46
  Yeah, okay, so let's go through the cast. All right.
• 4:48
  I don't know shit about this show. Why because we've been telling you for
• 4:53
  literal months that we are going to be covering this show, and I'm like,
• 4:57
  at least watch the No, at least I used to watch the last
• 5:00
  season so that you can become acquainted with what the fuck is going on,
• 5:04
  because last season was the biggest deal in vander Pump history. Honey, it
• 5:09
  was this gandival. I know. I watched the reunions. Oh I watched
• 5:14
  two of the reasons two out of how many four? Three? But the
• 5:17
  reunions are fucking lit. I was posting it up on ig yesterday. I
• 5:21
  was like, this is awesome because James calling Tom what's his face? A
• 5:27
  worm with a mustache? Yeah, amazing, peek James. So great.
• 5:31
  Yeah. No, the reunions were great. Ariana's dress was killers, and
• 5:38
  that was all great, But you really need to watch the season in our
• 5:42
  entirety. Are you going to do that? Yeah? So you're not.
• 5:45
  You're not going to do watch it. I'll watch it, okay, So
• 5:47
  I will do the best that I can in this conversation to sort of flesh
• 5:51
  out what's happening and who these people are? Because despite James really showing out
• 5:56
  and doing a great job in the reunion, he is a call lossal piece
• 6:00
  of shit. What I was liking him called loossal piece of shit? All
• 6:03
  right, misogynist, he's spit on one of the cast members, a female
• 6:08
  before like he's what he's bad? Okay, But well I don't like he
• 6:12
  was great in the reunion all right? Well, I mean I thought it
• 6:15
  was. His comebacks were really funny. Calling Sandoval a fucking uh pussy ass
• 6:18
  bitch. Yeah, I mean, which is with his fucking thin little mustache
• 6:25
  in nineteen twenties, like fucking whipping a time? What a loser? He's
• 6:29
  a loser? Oh my god? And he has a cover band did you
• 6:31
  know that? Stop? Yeah? What is it? Tom Sandoval and the
• 6:34
  most Extras? What? And that would be cool if he could actually sing,
• 6:43
  but he well no, I mean he can. He has a serviceable
• 6:46
  voice, but he goes off key. He's very pitchy. He's just such
• 6:50
  a fucking narcissist and he just sings other people's songs. What. Yeah,
• 6:56
  Well, of course he's a cover band. He doesn't write anything. He's
• 6:58
  not original. He doesn't have actual talent. Stop. Yeah, I'm sorry,
• 7:01
  I'm going off before I get their loser. Yes, So what we're
• 7:04
  gonna do is you're going to just read off the cast. You're gonna first
• 7:09
  and foremost tell us their astrological signs. We're gonna do sun and moon.
• 7:15
  Yeah, and then I'll share with you what I know about them. All
• 7:18
  right, Well, first up, we have Sandoval. Yeah, so what's
• 7:20
  the sign? So he's a cancer Sun Aquarius moon, Oh, which would
• 7:25
  be cool. That's very cool. But cancers are also they can be crazy
• 7:30
  and overly emotional, very much emotional, lots of feelings that are happening,
• 7:34
  can become overwrought in their feelings. But the Aquarius moon, Yeah that so
• 7:40
  the moon is your emotionality, yeah, and your feelings dreams. So what
• 7:44
  does that say about him? So he's got kind of a high minded maybe
• 7:46
  lofty, yeah, heady, maybe even spiritual side to his feelings, maybe
• 7:53
  airy too, like maybe not like a lot of substance if he's in his
• 7:56
  shadow side of it all, because it seems like he's a narcissist, right,
• 8:00
  So yeah, I mean I feel like if I looked at that just
• 8:03
  without knowing him. I'd be like, that's kind of cool placement though,
• 8:05
  but he's an asshole. Well, but truth of the matter is, like
• 8:11
  I liked Sandoval for the entire series, and I've been watching from season one.
• 8:16
  Really he was with this girl named Kristen and she was a complete trash
• 8:20
  bag basket case. She's now forty years old and she's come out of that.
• 8:24
  But like he was cheated on her, I think with Ariana, oh,
• 8:28
  which they denied, but it comes out that it's true. Ariana has
• 8:31
  ultimately admitted that, which drove Kristin crazy and he was gaslighting her about it.
• 8:37
  But Kristin was crazy and everybody wanted Tom to get away from her,
• 8:41
  so he ended up with Arianna and their relationship actually was kind of a cool
• 8:46
  anchor to the show because she's just got a good head on her shoulders,
• 8:50
  which Yah got to when we get to her, and I think she really
• 8:54
  shone a nice light on Tom. Made him look a lot better as a
• 8:58
  person. Wow, until last season he cheated on her. Yeah, yeah,
• 9:05
  until like we learned a lot more about like his character and integrity,
• 9:07
  which is he's got none. Wow. Yeah, unfortunately a piece of shit.
• 9:11
  Well then next we have Ariana, and she's also a cancer son.
• 9:15
  Really but virgo moon? Oh like you? Well, I'm a Virgo rising,
• 9:20
  you're a Virgo rising. Okay, what's your moon? Ariesman? Okay?
• 9:22
  Oh god, yeah, oh Jesus, So she's a Virgo moon.
• 9:26
  That's interesting that she's got a very organized way of thinking, fractory, methodical.
• 9:33
  Interesting, but she's a cancer yeah. Yeah. And I like Ariana.
• 9:37
  I have a feeling we're not gonna like her in this season because after
• 9:41
  last season, she got a lot of brand deals. She was on Dancing
• 9:46
  with the Stars, truly, the entire nation and I would even say the
• 9:48
  world was like in Ariana's corner and was on her side. But it kind
• 9:54
  of feels a little bit like we got oversaturated with Ariana. And I don't
• 9:58
  know if she got a big head about it, but there was some online
• 10:03
  gossip that indicated we're not going to really like her after this season because I
• 10:07
  think she's going to be a total flaming bitch to Tom Sandoval and anybody associated
• 10:13
  with him. Which the problem with that is is that they're all together trying
• 10:18
  to do a show, right, and they all work together, don't they.
• 10:20
  Yeah, so they have to be together, and I think she's gonna
• 10:24
  hate all of her friends who hang out with Tom, and one of her
• 10:28
  very best friends, Sheena, will get to her, I think, has
• 10:31
  been hanging out with Tom. So I think there's a lot of drama oh
• 10:33
  coming up for Ariana. But what I liked about Ariana was when she first
• 10:39
  came on the show, she wasn't afraid to show her insecurities and her vulnerability.
• 10:45
  She talked about an ex boyfriend that she had who nagged her all the
• 10:48
  time and like shamed her body in specific, like her punani her wet folds,
• 10:54
  her glistening folds, said it was ugly, and so she had like
• 10:58
  a she had dysmorphia about herself. And she's fucking gorgeous. Yeah, out
• 11:03
  of the entire cast, she's definitely will Laala's beautiful, but she's definitely I
• 11:07
  think the most beautiful. But she was pretty broken. Wow, And so
• 11:11
  we're watching this arc from this broken young girl to this powerful woman who fucking
• 11:18
  hates Tom Sandoval and I live. I mean, so, I loved all
• 11:22
  of her comebacks on the reunion so far that I've watched, but I kind
• 11:26
  of sensed like that there's gonna be some tension with some of the people because
• 11:28
  Lisa vander Pump is like sucking Tom's dig basically. I mean, she's just
• 11:33
  like she's got some inner misogyny. She's from like the boomer generation. I
• 11:37
  don't know. She gives I think automatic deference I think to men sometimes.
• 11:41
  That's just my personal opinion. But at the same time, she's been on
• 11:45
  the show for I don't how long has it been on guys, like ten
• 11:46
  years or something like that. She's watched these kids grow up from like early
• 11:52
  twenties or mid twenties to now almost forties, and so she loves them,
• 11:56
  and I think she has a love for Tom sand who she knew before Ariana,
• 12:01
  Yeah, by years, and she's very motherly. She's much more likely
• 12:07
  to forgive than the other people, namely Ariana. Interesting, but yeah,
• 12:11
  I think she's going to come under fire for that. Yeah, because it
• 12:13
  seemed like there was some of that going on in this in part two of
• 12:18
  the reunion, because I think I think it was Lala or Ariana had said,
• 12:22
  well, if Lisa's going to continue being friends with Tom or like try
• 12:26
  to support him or whatever, then we're going to have to reevaluate our relationship,
• 12:31
  and Lisa was like, what why why can't we be friends? Like
• 12:35
  why can't we all be friends? Yeah? And so I think the part
• 12:37
  that they're not saying out loud is that this is a friend group, yes,
• 12:41
  but it's also a business thing. First of all, it's Lisa's businesses
• 12:45
  that they're involved in to some extent, although I don't think Ariana or Tom
• 12:48
  are involved while Tom is with one of her ventures. But that's just kind
• 12:52
  of what happens, like when two people divorce, Like maybe I get these
• 12:58
  friends, he gets those friends, And that's just the way that it is.
• 13:01
  So I think it's going to be very interesting to see what happens in
• 13:05
  this friend group because I think some lines are going to be drawn, and
• 13:07
  I think Ariana is just gonna be like, fuck all of y'all. If
• 13:09
  you're not team Ariana, then I can't see you. Oh my god,
• 13:13
  I can't wait for this season. You have to watch the full season.
• 13:18
  Promise us that you will promise okay by next week? Right? Yeah,
• 13:22
  Okay, I trust you. You're you're making a face like are you lying.
• 13:26
  I'm gonna work on it, Okay, I need you to do it.
• 13:28
  I will, I will take it seriously. I use anyway, we
• 13:37
  have Schwartz, who's the other Tom right, right, So then he's a
• 13:41
  Libra son and Libra moon. Oh god, that kind of makes sense.
• 13:46
  Yeah. Why, Well, for me, a Libra is somebody who is
• 13:52
  looking at potentials, They're weighing their options. They are frequently of two minds.
• 13:58
  They're also, i say, very playcating and kind of companionable people.
• 14:03
  Yeah, my brother's a Libra and I love him. Solama, Yeah,
• 14:05
  Ethel's a Libra. Yeah, I love her. Yeah, But I mean,
• 14:09
  at the same time, Robin Brown is a Libra. I want to
• 14:11
  know, No, I want to know what her moon and her rising is.
• 14:15
  But that's interesting. Yeah, that is really interesting. And I think
• 14:18
  when I was reading this article about the astrological signs, I think I went
• 14:22
  and looked at Schwartz because I was like, it says that he's a Libra
• 14:26
  pretty much across the board, but he's got like a Sagittarius marsh and that's
• 14:30
  crazy. So what does the mars indicate? Because it's all about like your
• 14:33
  anger and how you handle conflict and stuff like that. So so he's a
• 14:39
  sad anger. Okay, yeah, you see that though, when you watch
• 14:43
  last season, you're going to see him because he's going through a divorce currently
• 14:48
  final with Katie, okay, and so last season we're kind of watching them
• 14:52
  split up. They're not formally divorced yet, I don't think. But he
• 14:56
  digs at her and he he goes out of his way to try to trigger
• 15:01
  her. And he's got this kind of like aw shucks personality. So he's
• 15:07
  very likable, but underneath that he's shady. He's kind of shady. He's
• 15:11
  petty. He's like a little petty guy. But I just can't help but
• 15:13
  like him, you really, I can't help but like me some schwartzy Why
• 15:16
  because you think he's cute? No? And also his dick doesn't work.
• 15:20
  Oh Katie, when they were dating and fighting one time called him out and
• 15:24
  said, and I don't fucking like your broken dick either, or something like
• 15:28
  that. Just like girl, you cannot call out your men's dick problems on
• 15:35
  national television. And he's never lived it down. Oh my god, that's
• 15:37
  sad. It is. It is very sad. She emasculated him all the
• 15:41
  time. I don't really like Katie, oh okay, because I thought she
• 15:43
  was really pretty. She's very pretty, and I think she's Oh no,
• 15:46
  it's not next, Shina is next. So she's a Taurus son and Sagittarius
• 15:50
  moon. Oh so she's a Taurus like me and a Sagittarius moon. Well,
• 15:54
  my little sister is a Sagittarius moon. Okay, Well, so what
• 15:58
  does that say about her? You're the expert in the professional I am all
• 16:03
  my friends calling it their personal astrologer because I'm a nerd. But Sagittarius moon
• 16:07
  would mean that, like, her emotions are big and deeply felt and maybe
• 16:14
  sometimes not able to be contained because there's so like, there's so much kind
• 16:18
  of overpower her a little bit. So she probably just feels really big,
• 16:22
  maybe comes off really strong in how she expresses her emotions. Maybe that might
• 16:26
  be off putting for people, or that they might think she's intimidating. So
• 16:30
  I don't know, but I don't know much about her. I saw her
• 16:33
  on the Reunions. She didn't talk too much except for criticizing Tom Sandoval right,
• 16:37
  which I appropriately so. So Shina has been around since season one,
• 16:42
  but she has an interesting tie into the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills because she
• 16:48
  actually cheated with the husband of one of those housewives. Her name was Brandy
• 16:53
  Glanville. Have you ever heard of her? Uh? Uh, girl,
• 16:56
  I haven't been in the Brava world. How do you not know what big?
• 17:00
  Anyway, So Brandy Glanville and Lisa vander Pump were very good friends.
• 17:04
  At one point they fell out, but so Brandy would have to come to
• 17:10
  Lisa's restaurants and she would see Sena because she was a server there and it
• 17:14
  really triggered her. Obviously, So that was from Beverly Hills. But then
• 17:18
  we start with vander Pump rules and Sin is an interesting character because she's an
• 17:22
  arc like she just wants to be I'm surprised she's not a leo. Honestly,
• 17:27
  she wants to be in the limelight star. She wants to be in
• 17:30
  the limelight. She wrote and performed a song called Good as Gold, which
• 17:37
  is super cringe and terrible. She wants to be a star by any means
• 17:41
  necessary. But at the same time, I think she has a really good
• 17:45
  heart, and she tends to be the outlier in friend groups like the cool
• 17:49
  Chicks or the mean Girl's table, like never let her sit there kind of
• 17:53
  a thing. While at the same time she's probably objectively prettier than all of
• 17:57
  them except for La La Yeah, and sweeter than all of them. But
• 18:03
  she's gone toe to toe with some of the big mean girls and she doesn't
• 18:07
  always lose. Sometimes she wins. Interesting. But she met this guy named
• 18:11
  Brock. Yeah, he's from Australia. Okay, I think she thought he
• 18:15
  looked like Jason Momoa or something, but I'm like dollar storage for sure,
• 18:21
  like longer hair. He's weird because he's got kids in Australia that he doesn't
• 18:27
  pay child support for or now he does, he doesn't see them, and
• 18:32
  he's got like a domestic violence offense against him, like he hit his ex.
• 18:37
  And Shina is just unlucky in love, like she picks the wrong people.
• 18:41
  She was married to this other guy before on the on the show,
• 18:45
  and he was into drugs and like she had to leave him, Like she's
• 18:48
  unlucky in love. She's picked this new guy, Brock, but he really
• 18:52
  feels like an opportunist and recently somebody called him a payroll husband, which she's
• 19:00
  went on her podcast which is I don't even know the name, but it's
• 19:03
  very popular and said, well, who cares just because he's on my payroll
• 19:07
  and I make more money, Like, this is twenty twenty four. Women
• 19:10
  should be able to make. That's not what a payroll husband is. Payroll
• 19:15
  husband is, like I believe somebody who's just there for the money. Yeah,
• 19:18
  just there for the clout. He's I would say, a cloud goblin
• 19:22
  and he's just been trying to warm his way onto the pantheon of characters on
• 19:27
  Vanderpump Rules stop it. Yeah, and I feel bad they had a child.
• 19:32
  Her name is Summer. She's very cute. That's a cute name.
• 19:36
  But I think in this upcoming season, as I said, I think she
• 19:38
  is going to talk to Tom and try to be Tom's friend. And I
• 19:45
  think that's and she is Arianna's bestie. Oh so I think that's going to
• 19:49
  cause some problems the him here for it. Oh another best friend from Marianna
• 19:55
  betraying her with her yes, yes, oh my god. Well the next
• 19:59
  we have So she's a Capricorn sun and Leo moon, which is interesting.
• 20:06
  Capricorns again the inscrutable sign to me, like, I don't know what that
• 20:10
  means. I can't feel what a Capricorn is. What's the Capricorn? Well,
• 20:11
  they're Earth signs and they're like often regarded as one of the older like
• 20:17
  sign astrological signs of the zodiac because they're close to the end of the the
• 20:22
  wheel and everything. They're very practical, very like, very down to earth,
• 20:26
  but also stubborn, like they're very stubborn Earth sign like some of y'all
• 20:30
  Earth signs are. Okay, don't look at me, like, I'm just
• 20:33
  saying, do you think I'm stubborn? I think I'm yliatory you stubborn sometimes.
• 20:38
  So Katie is an interesting one because like some seasons I like her,
• 20:42
  some seasons I absolutely hate her. She was definitely at the cool girl's table.
• 20:48
  She was one of the mean girls. She was the sidekick to a
• 20:52
  former star on this show named Stossy Okay, Stossy Schroeder, who was the
• 20:57
  breakout star along with Jack's who is warfriend at the time, and then she
• 21:00
  became a Nazi, so we don't talk about Stossy anymore. But Katie continued
• 21:06
  on with the franchise and she's just fucking mean. Sometimes I recall her body
• 21:12
  shaming some of the other girls. She was exceptionally mean to Shina made her
• 21:18
  feel like trash what But then like sometimes she'd be on the right side of
• 21:23
  history. James like body shamed her. The thing about Katie is that she's
• 21:30
  got an interesting past. At some point when she was younger, I think
• 21:34
  she fell through like a glass. You know, in buildings they'll have like
• 21:40
  ceilings, but they're there glass And I think she fell through one of those.
• 21:44
  And so if you watch pretty closely, you'll see some scars on her
• 21:47
  face. Oh. I think this injury really fucked her up and her also
• 21:51
  her perception of herself. She's got some inner wounds around that. But at
• 21:56
  the same time, she's been a terrible person. So we saw in the
• 22:00
  earlier seasons of vander Pump Rules her love story with Tom Schwartz. They were
• 22:04
  together when the whole franchise started, but we were really seeing them in the
• 22:10
  beginning of their relationship, and she was crazy, dude. We call her
• 22:15
  Tequila Tequila Katy because when she drinks, she becomes I would say, abusive
• 22:21
  and like, so she fucking text Schwartz these all night texts, being the
• 22:26
  most absolute person. I mean again, she called out his dick. She
• 22:29
  wasn't drunk then though, just a very mean streak and I think she frequently
• 22:33
  probably emasculated Tom Schwartz, which maybe lends itself to kind of how he presents
• 22:41
  now, which is a little more sheepish and such. But they were not
• 22:45
  a good match together. And I think that, you know, when we're
• 22:49
  younger, we're all crazy, and I think she was crazy. She's now
• 22:52
  in her mid thirties, she's got a divorce under her belt, she's living
• 22:56
  her best single life. She's fucking younger men. But at the same time,
• 23:00
  she doesn't have a family, and I think she's trying to consider what
• 23:03
  she wants. She went into business with Arianna. They are in the process
• 23:10
  of opening a little sandwich shop, and that's because Tom and Tom So Schwartz
• 23:14
  and Sandoval they started a business together too. They opened a bar. Yeah,
• 23:18
  they were talking about that in the reunion, right, And Katie at
• 23:22
  the time was married to Tom, was like, well, I thought we
• 23:23
  were going to open a shop together, and I've been waiting for us to
• 23:27
  do something because Tom Schwartz is always up Sandoval's ass. Yeah, anything Sandoval
• 23:33
  wants he will give him. And so Katie was always on the back burner.
• 23:37
  And so Ariana turned to her and she's like, oh, open one
• 23:38
  with you. You know, and then one or two years later, both
• 23:42
  of them are out of their relationships and these two girls are friends. It's
• 23:47
  interesting because Katie used to be very close to Kristin remember Kristen with Tom Sandoval
• 23:53
  and hated Ariana because Kristen maintained Arianna cheated on top, cheated with Tom on
• 24:00
  her, so she hated Arianna. But it's been very heartening to see how
• 24:06
  they've come to be friends and are now sticking up for each other because now
• 24:10
  they're single ladies around the same age and they have pieces of shit for exes.
• 24:14
  Interesting because I was kind of digging her vibe low key on the reunion.
• 24:18
  I think I thought she was really pretty. I thought she looked cool.
• 24:19
  But that Leo moon, though, that's the kind of the curve ball
• 24:23
  right there. Why because it's a fire sign again with a moon, you
• 24:26
  know, with your emotion, so your big, bold kind of a us.
• 24:30
  Leos can be kind of abrasive. Sometimes we're not considerate of other people's
• 24:33
  feelings. We just fucking go ball on the wall. Yes, and especially
• 24:40
  when you throw alcohol into the mix. Yeah, she yeah. So next
• 24:45
  we have Laala, who is a Virgo sun Aquarius moon, which I just
• 24:49
  love. I think that's cool. Tell us why, Well, because virgos
• 24:52
  are cool, Well, they can be cool. Sometimes they can be crazy
• 24:55
  and way too critical. But I'm a Virgo rising, so I vibe with
• 24:59
  a because virgos are just like down to earth, also like very practical,
• 25:03
  logical, like very cool people. And then Aquarius moon, I mean that
• 25:07
  can be really cool. Yeah, but like we saw with what's his face,
• 25:11
  standable with the Aquarius moon as well. I mean you can probably be
• 25:15
  two up in space or two area or two in your ego as opposed to
• 25:19
  like bringing it back down to reality. Yes, we are in this dimension.
• 25:23
  Stay here with us, thank you. So La La also known as
• 25:27
  Lauren from Utah because she's from Utah, but she puts on this big leg
• 25:32
  Hollywood air, so she Mormon. I don't know if she was. She
• 25:36
  came into vander Pump rules I think midway, so some of the early people
• 25:41
  were around, not everybody from the later seasons was around, but so she's
• 25:45
  kind of in the middle. Gorgeous, yeah, toxic af Oh. She
• 25:49
  is currently sober, which means that she had a problem before and anytime she
• 25:55
  drank, she just fucking popped the fuck off. Sometimes that would amount and
• 26:00
  definitely a lot of times verbal fucking aggression. What the heck, stink fucking
• 26:06
  mouth. But there's a very lovable side to her as well. So when
• 26:10
  she came on, she was by far, this is my opinion, by
• 26:12
  far, the most beautiful girl in the bunch, immediately garnering her a lot
• 26:18
  of side eyes from people like fucking Gaety and Stossy and Kristin. And so
• 26:23
  she kind of fell into a different crowd. She didn't fall in with the
• 26:26
  girl. She's kind of a guy's girl because she's hot. The guys will
• 26:30
  take her. At any point. She fell in with James. She ultimately
• 26:33
  had a relationship with James somewhat. James also had a relationship with Kristin.
• 26:38
  Kristin is the girl that James actually spat on. Oh, but she continues
• 26:45
  to have a good relationship with James to this day, although sober now,
• 26:48
  she's the one who's constantly telling James like, fucking cool it, you're drinking
• 26:52
  all the fucking time, you're a mess, you're a free radical, you're
• 26:55
  hurting people out here just like I did. And so she has kind of
• 26:59
  an interestingship with him. She can be very mean, oh, very petty,
• 27:03
  but at the same time very lovable sometimes as well. So a few
• 27:08
  years ago she started arriving to vander Pump to work as a hostess venomun Brules
• 27:14
  whatever, Vena Pump to work as a hostess. And she was in a
• 27:18
  range Rover, and everybody knew she didn't buy that range rover. And as
• 27:22
  it turns out, she had a sugar daddy, and she wouldn't tell anybody
• 27:25
  about it, and she wouldn't let anybody talk about him. But it turns
• 27:29
  out to be this guy named Randall Emmett, who's old. Yes, So
• 27:32
  she is like at the time that he comes into the scene, she's probably
• 27:37
  twenty six, twenty seven. He's in his forties, he's married, he's
• 27:40
  got two children, and she's fucking him. She's a fucking mistress now,
• 27:44
  she will say till she's red in the face. I didn't know. He
• 27:47
  told me they were separated, okay, but I don't believe it. Yeah,
• 27:51
  And I think that's why she hid him. And she would talk all
• 27:55
  the time about how her man lets her ride on the PGA, the private
• 27:59
  jit gave her that range Rover, and she would flaunt his money in front
• 28:03
  of everybody else, and I just want you Beatrice, Okay, when you
• 28:06
  have a moment to look up a picture of Randall Emmett because he looks like
• 28:10
  one of those fucking bullfrogs who was like fucking necks expanse Stopconnell level of not
• 28:18
  attractive. And when you compare and contrast with how gargeous Lalla is, I'm
• 28:23
  like, she's only with him for the money. Well, he ends up
• 28:26
  cheating on her. So this happened the sugar daddy. Yeah, of course,
• 28:30
  because how you get him is how you lose him. So he ends
• 28:33
  up cheating on her, even though he looks like a fucking toe and she's
• 28:37
  a goddess and she never thought it would happen to her, even though she
• 28:41
  did it to another woman, And so now she's in a battle, a
• 28:44
  custody battle, and she is heartbroken. They had a child together named Ocean,
• 28:49
  which I think, I can't that's cringe. Why I love that Ocean.
• 28:53
  That's so hippy dippy, I mean, but it's pretty. And then
• 28:56
  Sheena has a baby named Summer, so it's Summer and Ocean. They had
• 29:00
  him around the same time. They've also become pretty close Shay Sheena and Lava.
• 29:06
  So this baby that Laala had was with her sugar daddy with Toad guy
• 29:08
  yep, before they were ever married. So she never was married to him.
• 29:12
  And now she's just on a campaign to drag him, which appropriately so,
• 29:18
  but like she was, she was fucking around with some other woman's husband,
• 29:23
  whether she knew it or not, that's what she was doing. And
• 29:26
  so now she has all this fucking fire for tap Tom sand of All cheating,
• 29:30
  and I'm like, Okay, sit down. And that's the thing about
• 29:33
  this cast. Every single person on this cast has been a cheater. Yeah,
• 29:37
  Sheen, it fucked Brandy Glans Glanville's husband, Arianna was fucking around with
• 29:41
  Tom Katie. I don't know if I mean, I don't know if Katie
• 29:47
  ever cheated, but Tom Schwartz has cheated. Tom sand Of James has cheated.
• 29:52
  Everybody has done it, and so it's kind of rich to me that
• 29:56
  they are really going for Tom sand of All. Yeah. I don't know
• 29:59
  why it's that different than the shit that they did, but I guess that
• 30:03
  it is well gathering from what I my limited knowledge from watching the reunions.
• 30:07
  When Andy Cohen called them out, I loved Andy Cohen on these reunions.
• 30:10
  He's like telling James to sit in the fucking chair, right, not get
• 30:12
  the fuck upp I'm like loving that. Yeah, but he's straight up calling
• 30:17
  them out. He's like, well, you're all cheaters, so like,
• 30:18
  why do you even fucking care? And their whole reasoning, I guess is
• 30:22
  that it was a long relationship that he had with Ariana Sandoval and Ariana had
• 30:27
  a long nine year relationship or something like that, and that's why. And
• 30:30
  it was because he was fucking her best friend, yes, lying about it,
• 30:33
  right, which I mean that's bad. Yeah, Like if y'all are
• 30:37
  all a bunch of cheating hosts too, then I mean it is bad.
• 30:41
  Like it's the difference of like cheating when you're in high school or college for
• 30:45
  cheating when you're married. And Tom and Arianna owned a home together, they
• 30:48
  still do. She's trying to compel him to sail, oh wow, because
• 30:51
  he doesn't want to. He doesn't want to leave the house, of course
• 30:53
  not so they live together right now one year later in the same house because
• 30:57
  he won't leave because he's such a fucking dick bag in the Year of Our
• 31:00
  Lord. Yes, wow. So she hired an attorney, and she's trying
• 31:03
  to either get him out of the house so she can have it and she'll
• 31:07
  pay him off, or he can pay her off but he doesn't want to
• 31:08
  pay what she thinks it's worth, and or sell the place. So well,
• 31:12
  and I heard his career has been incredibly damaged because of all of this.
• 31:17
  Yeah, he's lost all of his brand deals and stuff. Let's just
• 31:18
  say he wasn't invited on Dancing with the Stars. He still has his Tom
• 31:22
  Sandoval and the most extras which people still go to. But it's a lot
• 31:26
  of times to hold up signs that say you're a fucking cheating dick bag and
• 31:32
  so god, Yeah, I think we're going to see in the next season.
• 31:34
  This season we start next week, him trying to carve out some kind
• 31:40
  of a redemption art okay, to somehow rehabilitate his image. I don't know
• 31:45
  if he's going to be able to do it. I think Arianna is going
• 31:48
  to be shitting on him so hard the entire time. Stop are him and
• 31:52
  Raquel still fucking no? Okay, So Raquel, which we don't need to
• 31:57
  get into because I don't think she's going to be on this season. She
• 32:00
  is looming in the background and she was with James. They were engaged.
• 32:07
  Tom Sandoval was James's best friend, according to James, helped helped James actually
• 32:15
  fund the proposal, like put twenty five thousand dollars into this grand proposal James
• 32:21
  to Raquel. Yes, So it was particularly stinging for James when he found
• 32:25
  out, even though by then Raquel and him were broken up, that Tom
• 32:29
  was banging his ex that he loved very much. So that's why he's going
• 32:32
  off. And yeah, that's why he's popping off, because he's trying to
• 32:35
  say I don't love Raquel anymore because he's with this new chick and she's boring,
• 32:38
  but he does he does probably still have feelings for Raquel. Wow.
• 32:44
  Yeah, yeah, because I saw his new chick on the show Alley or
• 32:47
  whatever, and she looks very pretty and very nice, very much so,
• 32:51
  and she's good for James, but he's gonna fuck it up. Yeah,
• 32:52
  And that's what everyone was kind of insinuating because they're like, well, you're
• 32:55
  drinking again, James. He's like, yeah, but it's different this time.
• 33:00
  Like Okay, that's what they all say. Yep, that's what they
• 33:01
  all say. Yes, well, speaking of him, he's the last one.
• 33:05
  He's an Aquarius sun and Libra moon, which again is a cool placement.
• 33:08
  There's a lot of Aquarius. Yeah, it's just me. No,
• 33:12
  there's a lot of Aquarius coming up. Interesting, and I love what I've
• 33:15
  never met an Aquarius. I don't like. I love Aquarius. Yeah,
• 33:17
  they're really cool. So he's an Aquarius sun and a Libra moon. Very
• 33:22
  interesting. I think you're a liber moon too, Actually, yes, I
• 33:25
  am. Yeah, So that would mean to me that he is probably living
• 33:30
  in the shadow of his potential in terms of his son sign Like yeah.
• 33:35
  For me, when I think of an aquarian, I think of like,
• 33:37
  uh, this is the dawning of like a high minded I'm thinking about fucking
• 33:40
  world peace. I'm a humanitarian. My life has a purpose, Like I
• 33:45
  feel like that's an aquarian and he's not living that way now, although he
• 33:49
  does have like a drive for his own purpose. He's a DJ. He's
• 33:52
  a hustler, but he's pretty. Is he actually good? Yeah? Kind
• 33:55
  of like what's his name, Polly DJ poly No, but he's a fucking
• 34:01
  multi millionaire due to his DJing, And of course Jersey Shore and James is
• 34:06
  kind of going along the same track. He's becoming very popular. He's a
• 34:09
  DJ, he hustles, so he has a vision for his life. But
• 34:13
  he's also a substance abuser. And he's also a really mean drunk, a
• 34:17
  really fucking mean drunk. So this is when he had a fight with Kristen
• 34:22
  and he spit on her, which, by the way, that's assault.
• 34:24
  You shouldn't do that. Last season, what did he do to Tom Schwartz.
• 34:30
  I think he threw a drink in his face and he just pops off.
• 34:34
  He doesn't have a filter at all. He's like scary like that to
• 34:37
  me, Like he will say the meanest. He goes for the fucking sweet
• 34:42
  white meat, he goes for the jugular. Yea, he's mean. Well,
• 34:46
  him calling him, calling Tom sanderbal all these names on the reuna.
• 34:50
  I was laughing, and he deserved that because it was hilarious. Yes,
• 34:52
  and he was just going bal to wall and like getting up in his face,
• 34:55
  going to fight him and everything. But I could kind of sense that
• 35:00
  when they talked about his drinking and I was like, oh, you're one
• 35:02
  of those guys. Yeah, Like he was one of the folks who was
• 35:06
  body shaming Katie because there's a couple of seasons where she's put on weight and
• 35:09
  she's very you know, self conscious about it, and he would just call
• 35:14
  her fat and make fun of her, and so he's just a piece of
• 35:17
  shit. Well bummer, Yeah, I need him to become conscious and become
• 35:21
  a better person. I'm very curious to see what life with his new girlfriend
• 35:25
  is going to be like if he's drinking, because she I forget her name,
• 35:29
  Ali, Sorry, she has a level head on her shoulder. She's
• 35:32
  young, but she's beautiful. Yeah, she's way out of his league if
• 35:37
  you ask me, with his weird head, and I'm sorry, I just
• 35:40
  don't think he's attractive whatsoever. But she's, you know, trying to manage
• 35:45
  him as best she can, and she's not going to be able to do
• 35:49
  it, and he's going to break her heart. Yeah, which is going
• 35:52
  to be sad, because even everybody on the cast in the reunion was like,
• 35:54
  no, I think Allie's really good for you, and she's actually trying
• 35:58
  to change you and to be a better man. He acknowledged that, but
• 36:00
  then talked about how he was drinking again, and I think Lala said she
• 36:05
  was four and a half years sober, which is really cool. So that's
• 36:07
  good that she's continuing to do that. But she still works at Lasser or
• 36:10
  whatever this, yes, sir, which is selling alcohol. Yeah, I
• 36:15
  don't think she works there anymore, okay, And that's kind of an interesting
• 36:20
  part of this is because when we started vander Pumperules, everybody worked there.
• 36:23
  They were waitresses, they were servers, they were working in the restaurant.
• 36:27
  So that made it really interesting. But now they're almost like fucking all thirty
• 36:30
  two to forty years old. They've made a lot of money from the show.
• 36:34
  They've gone on to invest in properties, and so they don't really work
• 36:36
  at the restaurant anymore except for camera time. And so I'm not sure what
• 36:39
  Laala is doing, but yeah, she doesn't work there anymore. Interest,
• 36:45
  yes, and so some predictions for this next season would be what I've heard
• 36:51
  is that and I can't believe it. But Laala like takes Tom Sandoval back
• 36:59
  into the friend group, which is rich because she told everybody in the friend
• 37:02
  group, if you side with my guy who I'm divorcing or I'm no longer
• 37:07
  with, and I'm I never want to talk to you again. Yeah,
• 37:08
  so she put that boundary out there, but Arianna, who's her friend,
• 37:13
  Like, she's gonna go and hang out with Tom Sandoval. Also we hear
• 37:16
  that Shena hangs out with Tom Sandoval, who you know by the way,
• 37:21
  Again, Sena is Ariana's like very best friend. So I'm wondering why,
• 37:24
  Like I'm wondering what's Ariana doing because my sense with her is she also can
• 37:30
  be very mean and you're gonna see it because you're gonna watch the season.
• 37:35
  Yeah, when she fucking finds out because the cameras were already off at the
• 37:38
  time that the affair came out, So Bravo picked up the cameras after I
• 37:44
  want to say, what a few weeks maybe a month that they hadn't they
• 37:46
  were not shooting at the whole thing was post production. Oh wow. So
• 37:50
  they pick up the cameras and they go back and they start filming and Ariana
• 37:54
  has just found out. And you see this scene with her on the couch
• 37:58
  honey when he's trying explain himself and she looks like a fucking Viking warrior bitch
• 38:04
  and she's just like, I don't want to hear about Ruckal. I mean,
• 38:07
  she's crazy and so I'm wondering that energy that she's got so fucking mad.
• 38:13
  Yeah, how is that going to show up in this show. One
• 38:16
  of the things that bothers me a great deal, and I think it's because
• 38:21
  of the privilege of a lot of these Bravo housewives and cast members is they
• 38:25
  tell themselves, well, I don't have to film with them, like I
• 38:29
  don't like them, and if you talk to them, I'm not gonna film
• 38:31
  with you, to which I say, this is your job, you literally
• 38:36
  Yeah, So if you don't want to film, quit then but if you
• 38:37
  want the fucking paycheck, which by the way, has got to be huge
• 38:40
  for Tom Sandeval and Arianna. If you want that paycheck, show up to
• 38:45
  work, bitch and shut your fucking mouth. So I'll be very curious to
• 38:47
  see how she handles that, because I think she's very mad. Oh shit,
• 38:52
  Well, and do you think that's gonna reflect negatively on her? Like
• 38:54
  she's just gonna be a bitch and push people away. That's what the rumors
• 38:58
  are saying, that she's going to like the audience, who is so pro
• 39:02
  Ariana and we all hate Tom. Yeah, I think the audience is going
• 39:06
  to start to turn a little bit oh shit, Yeah, I'm excited for
• 39:09
  that. Yes, I think it's great drama. I was like hesitant to
• 39:15
  start this because I don't watch Bravo stuff and sometimes like the house is wild,
• 39:17
  well like sometimes the Housewives shows are like so produced and I'm just like,
• 39:22
  this is stupid, you know, but this, I was pleasantly surprised
• 39:25
  when I was watching, like the beginning. I have watched the beginning of
• 39:28
  the season, I just haven't finished it finished. And then I watched the
• 39:30
  I skip to the reunions, but the reunions, I was like, give,
• 39:34
  this is what I want the Sister Wives reunions to be like. And
• 39:37
  that's why I wrote hosting it the Sister Wives franchise, not Sister Wives.
• 39:43
  Is that what you said, sister Wi? I was talking. I'm sorry,
• 39:45
  I was thinking of the Real Housewives. So I think that's why the
• 39:46
  Real Housewives are failing, because they are so fucking produced and scripted. It's
• 39:52
  like, we don't want that. I don't want that. I want visceral,
• 39:54
  actual, authentic lives and conflict. Like if it's not that, I
• 39:59
  don't I don't want it. And Sister Wives the same thing, yes,
• 40:01
  because they all go through the same bullshit in our own personal life. I
• 40:05
  don't want to watch somebody just getting clout on TV. It's kind of like
• 40:08
  with ninety fiance Like some of these people are obviously on it, creating bullshit
• 40:13
  just to get a clout. Yeah, I don't care. No, Yeah,
• 40:15
  So I'm looking forward to it, honey. Yes, it's gonna be
• 40:19
  a great season. I'm gonna like Quizzy next week to make sure you watched
• 40:22
  it. It's your raccoon homework some school. Well you're a nocturnal raccoon,
• 40:29
  so you'll make time. I will, you will make time. I'll watch
• 40:31
  it on my off time. All right, we're back, and now we're
• 40:37
  gonna be talking about ninety day Fiancee. Yeah, this horseshit of an episode.
• 40:42
  Well, don't be a hater. I'm not a hater. I'm just
• 40:45
  like, give me more substance, you know, I want the drums.
• 40:49
  Yeah, this is it's it's unfortunate. Yeah, I mean a lot of
• 40:52
  the entertainment value that I'm deriving from our podcast episodes. Yes, not necessarily
• 40:59
  funny, right, it's not necessarily from the show, but like, some
• 41:02
  interesting things happen. So I'm excited to get into it. All right,
• 41:07
  bitch, Well, we're just gonna be loosey goosey about it. Okay,
• 41:08
  there's no structure here. We're in a dump, sit talking, just deal
• 41:12
  with it, partying. So we're gonna start with Robin Sophie, who were
• 41:15
  a boring nothing burger. This episode, essentially, Sophie's mom is telling her
• 41:20
  leave this dude. Why wouldn't you? Why are you with? What are
• 41:22
  you getting from him? It is the worse magical dick does. It's got
• 41:29
  a magical but does he? But yeah, from Jesus, I had already
• 41:35
  blotted that from my consciousness. I had forgotten that we had found his only
• 41:38
  fans and some pictures of him spreading his sweet cheeks apart so we could see
• 41:44
  his booty. Old did you hear about that? Yeah? Okay, stuff.
• 41:46
  If you're on Patreon, we did post the picture, Yes we did.
• 41:50
  Sorry, it's pretty funny. You can find it on Reddit though,
• 41:53
  Yeah, you don't have to do all that. But yeah, so Sophie's
• 41:57
  mom's just telling her basically to leave him. Sophie's like, yeah, now
• 42:00
  I have doubts. I'm like, okay, finally, yeah, like good,
• 42:02
  We've been doubting this for you. Yeah, she's very impressionable, like
• 42:07
  very Before mom gets there, she seems to be okay with Rob. She's
• 42:10
  sitting at some fucking little table making him a meal in a hovel that doesn't
• 42:16
  work for anybody hostel. But then as soon as her mom gets there and
• 42:21
  lends a critical eye to everything, she's like, yeah, fuck him,
• 42:24
  he's wrong. He's not a real man to meet hill apologize. I'm like,
• 42:29
  well, take some responsibility for the bad joyses that you are in the
• 42:31
  process of making, for real. And then we have Rob at the laundromat
• 42:37
  talking shit without hair. I don't know, honey, Cotton can't. I
• 42:44
  mean, it's ridiculous, and he's just saying the same bullshit over and over
• 42:46
  again. Claire's disrespecting him. I'm a real man, even though I don't
• 42:52
  have a job and I don't want to get one, and I spread my
• 42:55
  asshole open on right, and I'm hoping that you and your rich family can
• 43:00
  fund my vagabond lifestyle for real. Though he's totally like hopeing for a shore.
• 43:07
  I'm not saying he's a gold digger. I mean, come on,
• 43:09
  he is totally a gold digger and one of his friends I forget which one
• 43:14
  is like, I don't think they're gonna get married, but the other one's
• 43:15
  like, no, I think they're gonna get married and get divorced, which
• 43:19
  I think probably tracks. I wonder if they're going to actually get married this
• 43:22
  season already talked about that, if they're gonna see we talked about that.
• 43:24
  Well, we'll see, and I told you what happens. I feel like
• 43:27
  it goes up and down. I feel like teal objectively, we have an
• 43:30
  outcome. I told you about that. Well, yeah, they go to
• 43:31
  Austin stuff, but that's after filming. That's what I'm saying. I wonder
• 43:35
  if we're going to see a fake wedding okay on this season. I don't
• 43:38
  think so. Well, we'll see. Next we have Nikki and just An
• 43:42
  Igor who are going horseback riding. This is all their relationship is. There's
• 43:47
  no fucking nuance. No, there's no aspect. There are no like enriching
• 43:52
  conversations about philosophy or science or the maths. No, there's nothing between these
• 43:59
  people except for are you gonna go to Poundtown tonight? For real? Do
• 44:02
  you love me or not? And if you love me, then you're gonna
• 44:06
  fuck this pussy get up in that multiple times a day or put it in
• 44:12
  their igor. My lady, I'm sick of you. Yeah, I'm sick
• 44:15
  of you. I will say though that on the road to horseback riding or
• 44:21
  whatever, like all of these produced moments and events like, oh, I'm
• 44:25
  so sick of it. She looked pretty because she wasn't wearing a ton of
• 44:30
  makeup and she had freckles. Yeah, skin looked really pretty. I'm like,
• 44:34
  oh, you know, Nick, if you just calmed down, you
• 44:37
  don't need all that. Yeah, you really don't need all that. You're
• 44:38
  very very pretty. Yeah. I thought that scene was interesting because of course,
• 44:44
  last week we have Igor out with his uh, misogynistic, sexist moldovan
• 44:50
  friend was like, you need to be a man, you need to be
• 44:52
  your masculine energy, and so we see him trying to do that in the
• 44:58
  car ride and he's like, no, you focus, you focus on me
• 45:04
  on our relationship, bakfast cleaning. Be a woman, And of course Nikki's
• 45:09
  like, I'm not that kind of woman, Like he wants a mold oven
• 45:13
  girl and I'm not like that. I'm not traditional. Yeah we know,
• 45:15
  yeah, we get it, but I felt personally like she was cowed by
• 45:20
  that, like meaning that I felt like she was a little surprised, oh
• 45:23
  by his energy, because she kind of shut the fuck up a little bit.
• 45:27
  She did argue a whole lot back. She did a little bit,
• 45:30
  Yeah, but she kind of just took it and almost submitted. I kind
• 45:34
  of submitted to him being a complete monster, being crazy, no more negative.
• 45:39
  It's like he doesn't know how to be the manist make fire fleets.
• 45:47
  It's so ridiculous. I dare my husband to talk like I would laugh,
• 45:52
  yeah, and then it would squirt him with a water bottle like you do
• 45:55
  a cat, like shut the fuck up. But you let him call you
• 46:00
  my six center about wife though, because that's true. Next we get to
• 46:06
  Manuel and Ashley, who are yet are boring because they're at Niagara Falls.
• 46:09
  I can't take this and they're having the same conversation over and over again.
• 46:17
  To die, shut up, cant with these people. All we do is
• 46:22
  argument. We're taking the same argument and moving it and moving it from a
• 46:27
  restaurant with your freaking friends to another fucking cafe where you're fucking in the bathroom.
• 46:30
  Now we're in you're on a beach, fucking talking the same argument.
• 46:34
  Now we're at Niagara Falls. Ye, I don't care, Ashley. There's
• 46:37
  nothing he can do, nothing that would cause you not to marry him.
• 46:42
  No, you're gonna marry him in the middle of a hurricane, which we
• 46:45
  have yet to see. Mm hmm. I'm waiting for it though. I
• 46:49
  am as well well. And she said they're cancer risings or something though at
• 46:52
  some point, because she's like it's so great, like the vibe is so
• 46:55
  awesome at Niagara Falls because of the water and the rainbows, and we're cancer
• 47:00
  risings and I don't know what that means. Well, they both have cancers,
• 47:04
  but they're both cancers signs. Well, then that's why they have a
• 47:07
  hurricane at the way, that's the shadow side of the cancer. Yeah,
• 47:12
  don't do it. God literally being like, don't marry each other. So
• 47:15
  they go to Niagara Falls and I'm like bored a b I'm like to my
• 47:22
  husband, I'm like, is that a man made waterfall? What did you?
• 47:28
  Literally were you actually thinking that I was mistaking it with like hoover down,
• 47:31
  stop it. And he looked at me and he's like, excuse me,
• 47:36
  Like, is that like a man made waterfall? Oh? My god?
• 47:39
  And You're sitting there talking shit, being like I'm dumb. I need
• 47:42
  to read books. Now I'm smart, and you think I'm getting smarter.
• 47:45
  I just didn't. I was like, wow, that's really incredible. Did
• 47:51
  men make that? That's amazing? So dumb. My husband is just like,
• 47:55
  I can't with you. That's kind of cute. Some things I'm very
• 47:59
  intelligent about, like you cannot touch my fucking vast knowledge on Yeah, but
• 48:04
  most things not so much. I'm actually the same way. I make dumb
• 48:07
  stupid comments like that. Your daughter's like, are you dying? Who did
• 48:12
  I marry? It's like my cousin when we were fourteen, were in the
• 48:15
  car going to the beach and at some point she just randomly said to my
• 48:17
  brother, Hey, Lloyd is the sun of star? And my brother's just
• 48:23
  like, are you fucking kidding me? Just like, no, is the
• 48:25
  sun a star? Woweah? I come from a long line of dumb people.
• 48:31
  That explains a lot. Yeah, now we know, now we know.
• 48:35
  Oh my god, I can't Niagara thinking Hoover, Damn, I don't
• 48:40
  know. It's one of the seven Natural World Natural Wonders of the World.
• 48:44
  We should go there. I would love to. I would actually really like,
• 48:46
  I'm the Grand Canyon. I've never been there, You've never been I've
• 48:49
  been up around there, but I've never been there. Oh the Grand Canyon
• 48:52
  is beautiful. Yeah, I'd like to do that too. Yeah was that
• 48:54
  man made? No? Yeah, they can't carved it out, just like
• 49:00
  Mount Rushmore, which is also a natural. Yeah. Yeah, all right,
• 49:10
  next week, get too. Gino and Jasmine, who are fucking safe?
• 49:15
  I just it's a roller coaster whirlwind of an experience watching those two up
• 49:22
  and down. So they're cutting vegetables in Gino's kitchen and at some point it
• 49:27
  gets brought up, like Jasmine's like, what's what's wrong, gin know your
• 49:30
  vibes off vibe check, And Gino's like, well, I'm still kind of
• 49:34
  upset because your ex that you bring up in every single argument that we have,
• 49:37
  that he fucks you better and he's got a big dick and you love
• 49:40
  him or whatever. He paid for your implants and you didn't tell me.
• 49:44
  And she's like, well, he's my friend though it was a gift,
• 49:47
  And what about Gino, when you sent my nudes to your ex gray friend
• 49:52
  who then I didn't know this ye blackmailed? Jasmine like literally sent her nudes
• 49:59
  to jasmine employer because she was working at like a university or something, and
• 50:01
  she got fired for it. She lacked to her or did she just revenge
• 50:06
  porn her? She just sent the notes to her employer in yeah, right.
• 50:09
  So the first part is bad though, because instead of just taking responsibility
• 50:15
  for the really shitty thing that Jasmine did and then she lied about it and
• 50:19
  held it from him, she what abouts him and says, well, what
• 50:22
  about you though, and your ex and all the shit that that person did,
• 50:24
  and then takes the light off of her puts it on him. He
• 50:29
  doesn't react, well, no, And the first thing he says, which
• 50:31
  is a really motherfucking thing to say, is well, did you provoke her?
• 50:36
  Yeah, as, what did you do anything you can do that would
• 50:38
  provoke somebody doing revenge porn on you? Right? Like what kind of comment
• 50:44
  is that? So that sets Jasmine off. She pops off with her knife
• 50:47
  with her knife in her hand, screaming at him, and she's like,
• 50:52
  you know what, I'm just gonna go fuck Dane. My ex immediately goes
• 50:55
  to the one thing that would cause the insecurity in the first place, that
• 50:59
  would make it said that he took two thousand dollars from him. Why is
• 51:02
  this mystery to you? Job me realize. So she screams and she says
• 51:07
  I'm not gonna marry you because you're a fucking idiot, and goes upstairs to
• 51:09
  cry, and Gino's like, I'm just gonna give her some dome let her
• 51:14
  cool off, because usually when she does that, I'm able to talk with
• 51:16
  her. So he's learned his lessons a little bit. He's learning some stuff.
• 51:20
  So he sits down stairs in place with their weird dog that's always dressed
• 51:23
  in some baby clothing, and then after like thirty minutes, he goes back
• 51:27
  up there and she's cooled down and they talk about it, and he's like,
• 51:30
  well, you should stop talking about talking to Dane, like you should
• 51:35
  stop having a relationship with him. If I can't have a relationship with my
• 51:37
  ex rightfully, so then you shouldn't have a relationship with Dane. Yeah,
• 51:42
  and so you need to break it off. And Jasmin agrees to do this.
• 51:45
  Right but she pulls up her phone, her WhatsApp, and the first
• 51:49
  message that she has from Dane is hey babe, which means really, oh
• 51:52
  yeah, I didn't even see that I saw there was something, but I
• 51:55
  didn't like you did. I'm sleuthin you like zoom raccoonum for bitch. No,
• 52:00
  I saw it like they showed it. The producer showed it, and
• 52:04
  I said, hey, babe, And she had deleted all of the previous
• 52:06
  messages. So I'm like, bitch youse a cheeto, she's a home she's
• 52:10
  a cheeta, and she's a hope for real. Like, and she had
• 52:16
  mentioned in this argument with Gino that she shouldn't have gone to like a goodbye
• 52:22
  dinner with Dane, and I'm like, okay, a goodbye fuck. Yeah.
• 52:24
  Yeah, she's been fucking him on the side for sure. But anyway,
• 52:28
  So she sends Dane o WhatsApp message, which I thought was kind of
• 52:31
  funny because she's like, you know, you're such an amazing guy and like
• 52:36
  so awesome, and like I love you and I value our relationship a lot
• 52:38
  because you're just so amazing and so great. But I have to prioritize Gino
• 52:45
  and our relationship because I'm gonna get married him. He's my future husband,
• 52:49
  and so we can't talk anymore. Okay, thank you by I thought her
• 52:53
  message to Dane was really sweet. Yeah, and I thought it well except
• 52:59
  for her being like, you're so amize well, but I mean, I
• 53:00
  just I feel like she has probably cheated with Dane on Gino, and so
• 53:07
  she's trying to be as conciliatory and complimentary as big words, complimentary as I'm
• 53:13
  reading again, complimentary as possible, so that he doesn't put up a fuss,
• 53:17
  yeah, and make any trouble for her. Yeah, And I think
• 53:21
  it was a sweet message personally, and I'm really proud of her for doing
• 53:23
  it, especially after she had that fucked up argument with Gino where Gino was
• 53:30
  one hundred percent out of line for asking her whether she asked for it,
• 53:34
  Yeah, she provoked. He's terrible. And then they show the flashback from
• 53:37
  the previous season, which I conveniently forget all the time, where he actually
• 53:43
  sent her nudes to his ACTX like what I got now, and she finds
• 53:46
  out and she freaks out and she assaults him because they're crazy. But I'm
• 53:51
  like, he is such a dick bag, he's scummy, he's a fox
• 53:54
  stick. Yes, it's a terrible person, he totally is, And you
• 53:58
  made the decision to stay with him him, Jasmine, And so I don't
• 54:00
  here where we are. Why, I really don't. He got no money
• 54:05
  and got job on. You got to take the piano. Somebody got to
• 54:12
  take the blue pill to even approach your punani. Yeah, he doesn't have
• 54:15
  any communications style, although in Miami he was sweet in the last episode,
• 54:22
  so right, but is that enough? I don't know. I hate that
• 54:24
  after she sends that message and they hug or whatever. I caught this comment.
• 54:30
  I don't know if you caught it, but she knows, like he
• 54:31
  gives her a kiss and he's like, okay, do baby talk now?
• 54:35
  What? Yes, he literally said okay, do baby talk now? And
• 54:38
  she's like, no, you don't deserve it, and he's like, why
• 54:43
  not, that's interesting baby talk? So she peas on him. She wears
• 54:47
  nurse outfits and she baby talks him. Does he wear a diaper? Is
• 54:52
  he one of these adult diaper fetish people? Is he wearing a diaper?
• 54:57
  In this scene? Does he have the panthers? Think he wears diapers?
• 55:02
  They wear diapers? That makes perfect sad, I know, Oh my god,
• 55:07
  it makes sense with how like abusive Jasmine is like maybe it's like a
• 55:10
  weird Dominatrice Snabe, but they have like a weird kink where she abuses him
• 55:15
  and dominates him and talks to him like a baby. I guess we're not
• 55:20
  going to kink shame. That's one thing we're not going to do, Beatrice.
• 55:23
  I'm not king shaming, but I'm judging. I'm judging it a little
• 55:27
  bit. I mean, I think it's just crazy that I said that.
• 55:30
  It's kind of I totally missed it. Wasn't paying attention. He I had
• 55:35
  to rewind. I was like, I did not just hear that. And
• 55:37
  wearing diapers, yes, baby talk, he's peeing in his diapers? Pop?
• 55:43
  Is it poop a dippy? I don't know. Maybe she lay dipy,
• 55:45
  Maybe she feeds him bottles and stuff. Oh my god, this is
• 55:50
  the only way we make ninety day interesting is through our conspiracies and our theories.
• 55:54
  For real. Oh my god, he's a diaper wearing sting dog peepee
• 55:59
  baby in great. Next, speaking of pep baby man, we get to
• 56:04
  Clayton and Annaly and his racist mom. God, so fucking raiz boomer,
• 56:14
  fucking bitch cook me American food. Can't she speak English because she's not from
• 56:22
  here? Bitch? God, why don't you go there and speak Spanish well,
• 56:24
  but in all fairness though, there's no fairness. I hate her.
• 56:28
  In all fairness though, Clayton learned Spanish or whatever to speak with her,
• 56:32
  and she's supposed to learn English because they met on a translating app So I
• 56:37
  mean she should be speaking more English. I don't know about more English.
• 56:40
  I think she. I mean, I don't think she's trying. I don't
• 56:44
  is she. I think she's probably trying. It's going slower than maybe.
• 56:47
  Maybe she's not putting all of her forces behind her learning of a second language.
• 56:52
  But his mom's a fucking toad. Facts, bitch, I'm sick chicken.
• 57:00
  My son likes baef. Oh my god, Like shut up. And
• 57:04
  then she's bitching about how they interact in the house. She's like, I'm
• 57:07
  trying to sleep and you got lights on and you're making noise. You sleep
• 57:10
  in the closet, in a closet sleep. I just know you're gonna ask
• 57:15
  me to leave. Yes, you should get out. Your son is trying
• 57:20
  to get married, he's trying to start his life. He wants to take
• 57:22
  a wife. He wants to fucking have a family. Yeah, which would
• 57:25
  be a very weird looking family. I mean, and get out of his
• 57:29
  fucking closet. Lady, Yeah, I'm sorry. You hoarded your way out
• 57:31
  of your uh fucking ranch with three bedrooms fucking two baths, and you don't
• 57:36
  have anywhere to go go live in your storage unit. You leaves a shit
• 57:39
  tired of Peruvian chicken. Of all things, I wish my daughter in law
• 57:44
  would make me. I'll have to learn, I'll have to hear. It's
• 57:47
  really good. It sounds every night, it sounds delicious. If I could
• 57:52
  only eat that shit every night. I know this woman, I know.
• 57:55
  Could you imagine if we live together, I'd be cooking for y'all all the
• 57:58
  time, so much batter her for real, you and your husband. But
• 58:01
  I'd be making so much food for the family up in here. Yeah,
• 58:05
  I would just be like, but you'd be happy, gooty puffing around and
• 58:08
  be like, where's my fucking cookies? And I dare you if we lived
• 58:13
  together and you were complained about what I was cooking for y'all, I would
• 58:15
  love her. I would never I am. I'm You're lucky to have a
• 58:19
  mother. I'm such a fucking gem. I have gotten the privileged, so
• 58:23
  privileged, don't even know. I'd be so grateful. But this bitch ain't
• 58:27
  grateful. Now, Annaly is never happy. Annilee has always got the fucking
• 58:31
  stink face. But if Annie is up in that kitchen making you Peruvian chicken,
• 58:37
  I wouldn't be bitching about the dishes. I'd be like, can I
• 58:38
  help let me do the dishes. Thanks for cooking this entire beautiful meal for
• 58:43
  me. Let me lean the kitchen. Get out of your fucking closet.
• 58:45
  I know you fucking had, Like, what are you doing all day?
• 58:51
  For real? She's fucking reading xenophobic comics. Maybe she's reading smut. Now
• 58:58
  that's rude. My smut is not xenophobic. No, I'm saying, but
• 59:02
  maybe she's reading smut in there because she's doing nothing. She's I mean,
• 59:07
  what does she do? She lays on a mattress in the closet, She
• 59:08
  has a full on like TV in there, She like maybe just an eye,
• 59:13
  she's like a tablet or something, and then she cuddles and works with
• 59:15
  a guinea. Sorry, but you are a pox on his house. You
• 59:19
  are a fucking dark cloud of doom. Get out of fucking closet. Don't
• 59:22
  be coming up here. Why can't she speak English bitch, get out of
• 59:27
  here. This woman I know. And then Clayton even talks about how he
• 59:30
  has dealt with the treatment from his mom. His mom's super passive, aggressive,
• 59:35
  she always makes comments and he just ignores it. But now that Anna
• 59:37
  Lee is around, he's gonna have to call her out on this stuff.
• 59:40
  And I'm like, okay, mama's boy, Yeah, let's talk about that
• 59:43
  toddler bit. Yes, because the moment one of my family members starts maligning
• 59:47
  my husband, you are gonna have a problem with get me here. I'm
• 59:51
  not gonna live into that, and you can't stay in this fucking house.
• 59:52
  Get your fucking fat ass out of here. That is what I would be
• 59:55
  doing. Yeah, that is who I am. But I mean, like,
• 59:58
  why aren't you doing that? You're allowing your dumb ass, horder ass
• 1:00:01
  mom to say this ship, which is I think pretty racist xenophobic. Ye
• 1:00:07
  mean about your wife who can't speak English or understand a lot of English,
• 1:00:13
  and you're talking to her about it, like, yeah, I wish she'd
• 1:00:15
  speak English or whatever, learn English so she could take care of some of
• 1:00:19
  this wedding planning. Oh my god, let's get to the wedding planning ship.
• 1:00:22
  Though, because this is ridiculous. It's three days to their wedding and
• 1:00:25
  they've barely got anything planned. Annily's like, Clayton, what have you gotten
• 1:00:30
  done? And he's like, I got plates with his little fingers. I
• 1:00:37
  don't know. I don't know. I've been playing World of War grounds.
• 1:00:42
  I just can't not see them. I know. Anytime he gesticulates, I'm
• 1:00:45
  just like, oh my god, I can't imagine, like you're being touched
• 1:00:51
  by a toddler's crime. I've got small ass hands. His hands are probably
• 1:00:58
  like smaller than I'm so white, pale god and gelatinous god. He's terrible,
• 1:01:04
  no for real, but like so Anilely's asking him, like what do
• 1:01:07
  you have planning? He's like, I don't know. Brandy's supposed to do
• 1:01:08
  stuff, and like what have you done? Annie? And she's like,
• 1:01:12
  I can barely speak English. It's like, what do you mean? What
• 1:01:15
  have I done? Yeah? But did you catch how She's like, I
• 1:01:16
  should have my makeup done and my hair done. I'm like, just go
• 1:01:20
  to the courthouse like I had to do for at least five of my own
• 1:01:22
  marriages. Get married on your own fucking dime. Take care of yourself.
• 1:01:25
  To your own makeup. You don't need a fucking glam squad. No,
• 1:01:30
  not everybody needs a glam squat or your lamas and alpacas and bullshit. I
• 1:01:36
  can't fuck out. And if you're all pack of bullshit, it's for her
• 1:01:39
  culture though, Okay, make your Peruvian chicken. I'll eat the fuck out
• 1:01:43
  of that. I do not need an help packup. By the way,
• 1:01:45
  I think they're mean. Oh yeah, they spit. They spit, and
• 1:01:47
  they mean no thanks. No I need an alpaca spitting on my Peruvian fucking
• 1:01:52
  chicken. Absolutely not. I do not want that. No thank you.
• 1:01:54
  And so they pack up their small car and they drive up to Indiana to
• 1:01:59
  go hang out with brands, which is the worst state in America. I
• 1:02:02
  think Ohio is the worst state. I've been to both, and I've been
• 1:02:06
  to Indiana quite a few times. I feel like Ohio's nothing good happens in
• 1:02:09
  India. Oh my god, I don't know. There's something just very depressed.
• 1:02:15
  Oh my gosh, some about it. I don't like. No offense.
• 1:02:19
  If you're from Indiana, maybe help me to see the light. But
• 1:02:22
  oh god, let's go to Indiana for a fucking bachelorette. Why no,
• 1:02:27
  thank you. I don't know. It seems very dingy. But they go
• 1:02:30
  up to Indiana. They go and hang out with Brandy and Clayton's like,
• 1:02:35
  yeah, so what have you got planned? And Brady's like, well,
• 1:02:37
  I have a list for you of shit that needs to be done. Yeah,
• 1:02:39
  I'm not your bitch. Yeah, And I think she said, like
• 1:02:43
  she was asking Clayton, like what have you got done? And he's like,
• 1:02:45
  I've got plates and like banners or something like their plastic all that's all
• 1:02:51
  they have. They don't have anything planned, they don't even have a He's
• 1:02:53
  expecting his sister to do all of this ship did she volunteer at some point?
• 1:02:58
  And we dis missed it? But like I dare my brother to tell
• 1:03:00
  me that I got to set up his whole life. I'm just like,
• 1:03:04
  okay, I'll be there right on time. And I would never go no,
• 1:03:07
  I know. And that kind of explains Brandy's personality a little bit,
• 1:03:09
  like we thought she was kind of being a bitch a few episodes ago.
• 1:03:13
  A fucking racist mom and a toddler baby pamper boy for real brother, And
• 1:03:17
  she even says She's like, I don't think Clayton ever does anything on his
• 1:03:21
  own because he's always lived with her mom and like never does anything and so
• 1:03:24
  and he's lazy, so he expects everybody else to take care of it because
• 1:03:28
  he doesn't want to be the man like Igor is trying to be and actually
• 1:03:31
  take care of it. Focus. It's three days to their wedding, and
• 1:03:37
  I think they cobbled together some kind of bachelorette party or bachelor party. Honey,
• 1:03:43
  I can't wait. And he's like telling only no strippers, okay,
• 1:03:46
  and what does she do? She gets strippers? I know, I love
• 1:03:50
  it. I can't wait. I can't wait. I just want to see
• 1:03:52
  Clayton in his toddler baby baby body, trying to set down the law,
• 1:03:58
  laid down the law. Okay, all right, okay, sweetheart, AKA
• 1:04:04
  no big dicks, no dicks bigger than mine. That that is a possibility
• 1:04:10
  that there are other dicks out there that could actually please you. Maybe she's
• 1:04:15
  got you know, a short serfax or something. Maybe it does please her.
• 1:04:19
  No, so terrible. And then, last but not least, we
• 1:04:24
  get to Sam and Citra, and Sam is taking Citra's dad and two sisters
• 1:04:30
  over to his family's house to meet his weird dad and have American food aka
• 1:04:39
  KFC. Right, it looked really bad, and so they go to sit
• 1:04:45
  down to have dinner and like Citra and her sisters and her dad get like
• 1:04:51
  one thing of chicken because they're like, look at all these carbs. You
• 1:04:55
  Americans are fat. That's what they're thinking. They eat chicken. They eat
• 1:04:59
  the chicken. They hate it. But they eat chicken in Indonesia, but
• 1:05:01
  not the batter. No, but they're eating the chicken. It's like pure,
• 1:05:05
  this is what they used to. It is absolute prison food, unseasoned,
• 1:05:11
  terrible, which I thought was hilarious because Americans always think that we have
• 1:05:15
  the best country and the best food and shit. I'm like, no,
• 1:05:16
  we don't. Secondarily, I would eat the shit out of that. I
• 1:05:19
  mean, if it was good for chicken, I would always. I will
• 1:05:25
  tear into some cans honey, and I don't deny it. My issue with
• 1:05:29
  KFC. I like their chicken because it's salty, but the crust is not
• 1:05:31
  crispy. I want a crunch the crispy one. There's the original one,
• 1:05:36
  which is not crunchy, and then there's the extra crunchy. Oh I didn't
• 1:05:41
  know that. Oh, yeah, honey, I don't get to do some
• 1:05:43
  investigation. But that is so shameful to serve your Indonesian guests who spent thirty
• 1:05:49
  hours on their fucking legs to Missouri. Can't bump free Missouri. Yeah,
• 1:05:56
  kfc, you couldn't, sucking cook, I know he can't. Didn't throw
• 1:06:00
  something together with a little flavor in there are the worst. They're terrible,
• 1:06:06
  And this whole time they're eating this food and they're trying to socialize with Citrus
• 1:06:11
  family and everything, and Sam's just got this looming secret over his head that
• 1:06:15
  he's got to break it to Citru's dad. I hate him so much.
• 1:06:18
  He's absolutely yes, he is so terrible. His dad throws him under the
• 1:06:23
  bus, like, yeah, like he used to. He used to really
• 1:06:25
  fucking suck. Now he doesn't suck as much. He's like sort of maturing
• 1:06:29
  a little bit, but yeah, he used to be very irresponsible. That's
• 1:06:33
  just what Citru's cop dad wants to hear. His uh, Citrus dad is
• 1:06:39
  like already sussing it out. Yeah, I mean he's looking at this house,
• 1:06:43
  which is a it's a fine house, but I mean fine, it's
• 1:06:46
  good, And he's looking at Sam's weird dad and the weird food, and
• 1:06:50
  he's just like my daughters, living too far from the face tree. Which
• 1:06:58
  have we talked about that, Sam, I'm talking about his jaw. Yeah,
• 1:07:00
  We've talked about that. So I'm trying to be rude. I'm not
• 1:07:03
  trying to be rude, but I'm just like, I mean, very strong
• 1:07:06
  genetics. Yeah, very strong, very strong. And at some point they
• 1:07:12
  ultimately have the conversation where Sam and Citra talked to her dad. I hated
• 1:07:17
  him so much in this conversation, Sam, Yes, because he wouldn't even
• 1:07:20
  look at him. No, he's too ashamed. He looked at Citra.
• 1:07:24
  He made Citra tell him he came up with his dumb as fuck subox.
• 1:07:28
  In the story, he failed to mention that he was also caught with fucking
• 1:07:30
  cocaine. Yeah, and paraphernalia, which we discussed in the last episode.
• 1:07:34
  Yep. So he's a lying liar who lies and he's making his wife,
• 1:07:38
  well he can't speak the language, but he's making his wife say these things.
• 1:07:41
  And he won't even look at the man in the eyes. Nope,
• 1:07:43
  like, at least as she's saying the shit, look at him in the
• 1:07:46
  eyes, right, Mab not a little bit. No, he can't because
• 1:07:49
  he's ashamed of his choices and he should be. Yeah, he definitely should
• 1:07:53
  be, and like, just own up to it. That would speak volumes
• 1:07:56
  as opposed to not giving eye contact and looking ashamed by your actions, which
• 1:08:00
  you're dumb about because you had Sebasa in an unmarked prescription bottle and cocaine and
• 1:08:05
  shit, like what are you doing? That's stupid. And then you couldn't
• 1:08:10
  even file the diversion paperwork on time, and so now you have the possibility
• 1:08:14
  of going to jail, which is ridiculous. It's absolutely more important than that
• 1:08:17
  you're bringing in this girl from Indonesia to marry her and you might have to
• 1:08:21
  go to jail if you don't file this paperwork. And so opes, I
• 1:08:24
  missed my deadline. Yeah, oh you're a fucking loser. Citra deserves so
• 1:08:28
  much. Why does Citral like him? I along with Citra though, because
• 1:08:31
  she's a beautiful girl, a beautiful place, she's got a great family.
• 1:08:34
  Why does she want to move into the middle of bump Buck, Missouri and
• 1:08:38
  live with this guy? The way he carries himself as he's walking around like
• 1:08:42
  he's a fucking Marionette on strings why I just can't take it, I know,
• 1:08:45
  and he's going to start doing drugs immediately, and Hermann the whole entire
• 1:08:51
  time is like, do you even know who the fuck I am? Like,
• 1:08:54
  I'm a fucking cop. Don't bullshit me, Like, don't try to
• 1:08:58
  skirt around the severe of this, Like, tell me how long you're gonna
• 1:09:01
  have to be in jail if you have to go to jail, and Sam's
• 1:09:03
  like, oh, six months to a year, which is insane. So
• 1:09:06
  you expect Citra to deal with that if you actually go to jail to hang
• 1:09:10
  out with your weird, creepy dad and your horn dog brother. Okay,
• 1:09:14
  weird fucking house cocaine and food. Well, but ultimately, spoiler alert,
• 1:09:17
  Henry let Citrus stay. They end up getting married, and so he and
• 1:09:21
  Herman Henry Okay, so Herman ends up letting her stay. He does get
• 1:09:27
  his diversion so he doesn't go to jail. Yes, but I'm just like,
• 1:09:30
  it's just a matter of time that he before he does drugs. And
• 1:09:33
  Herman even says to him, no ilicit goddamn drugs. If I find out
• 1:09:39
  that my daughter is living with somebody who's doing drugs, Like that's the fucking
• 1:09:42
  end. Absolutely not. Yes, oh, okay, matter of time.
• 1:09:45
  I know it's at least Citra has a good family that would fly her back
• 1:09:49
  out home if shit goes astray. But I'm like, would Citra even tell
• 1:09:55
  her family that? Right? That is the question. I mean, you
• 1:09:57
  didn't tell your family about this man at all when you flew over here,
• 1:10:00
  so like you're just expecting your family to be okay with it, and they
• 1:10:03
  love you and they're gonna try and trust you, but they're looking at this
• 1:10:06
  dude that you picked, and they're like, why literally why she could get
• 1:10:13
  like a well off American man who would support her and live like a good
• 1:10:17
  life, but she chose this bump? Fuck why? From Cameron, Missouri.
• 1:10:21
  We can't help who we fall in love with. I guess I women
• 1:10:24
  put on those rose colored glasses, honey. I don't know how she puts
• 1:10:28
  those glasses on and looks it sad. I don't get it, or she's
• 1:10:30
  surprised or even with Jasmine and Jeem No, like, how does she actually
• 1:10:34
  love him? Why does he love her? He loves her? She peas
• 1:10:39
  on him and talks Yes, I don't know all these people are crazy.
• 1:10:44
  They are insane. But that's basically where we leave off with them. And
• 1:10:48
  then we get to the preview where Ashley and Manuel are working on a boat,
• 1:10:51
  and then men Will starts crying because he misses his family, which I
• 1:10:55
  love to see somebody's heart and vulnerability children, even though she doesn't know his
• 1:11:00
  children right or his family. Nicki and Igor have some kind of weird party
• 1:11:05
  and then she starts singing. She starts She's like, oh no, I
• 1:11:12
  can't, and then suddenly there's a microphone, as if she didn't make sure
• 1:11:15
  that it was there in the first place, and then she's singing in front
• 1:11:17
  of all of these horrified people because her voice is absolute trash. It's it's
• 1:11:21
  not what you think it is, Nicki. It's really bad. It's like
• 1:11:25
  her whole dream for her life is to first bag a Moldovan man and second
• 1:11:29
  to be a rock star, a pop star. Nicki exotka, no,
• 1:11:32
  yeah, it's just never gonna work. She needs your father when you're nine
• 1:11:36
  years old telling you you're never gonna be a pop star. Fucking stop.
• 1:11:40
  It ever gonna be embarrassing made she is so embarrassing. And then Sophie comes
• 1:11:46
  out as bisexual to her mom. Yeah, which I'm just like, why.
• 1:11:50
  I guess that's the only interesting thing about their whole storyline is her bisexual
• 1:11:55
  bisexuality and him being jobless. Bisexuality is valid, Beatrice, it is,
• 1:12:00
  but I'm just like, this is such a production for no reason, you
• 1:12:03
  know. And then Claire her mom is like, well, but have you
• 1:12:06
  not been with a girl yet? Well you should, so you should break
• 1:12:09
  up. That is one hundred percent me. Yeah, my child came to
• 1:12:12
  me and she was betrothed or going to marry some dude please, Okay,
• 1:12:18
  But and then she says, I'm bisexual. Mom, I'm like, absolutely,
• 1:12:21
  don't get married. Go down on a box, yeah, and let
• 1:12:25
  the person go down on your box and it and see if you can fall,
• 1:12:28
  and like, don't get married until you experience this part of yourself.
• 1:12:32
  And so I appreciate Claire for doing that. Yep. And I think Sophie's
• 1:12:36
  totally going to break up with Rob for that and he's gonna be heartbroken.
• 1:12:40
  Good. I can't wait to see Rob for real. And then Sam's mom
• 1:12:45
  tells him that she doesn't think he should have to convert to Islam to marry
• 1:12:49
  Cintra and he gets all mad about it. She's drunk. Yeah. And
• 1:12:54
  then also herman doesn't really want Cetra to marry Sam, but he's like,
• 1:12:58
  oh, okay, yes I do. Yeah, we're here, this is
• 1:13:01
  happening. Yep. And then Annie has her bachelorette party with strippers after Clayton
• 1:13:05
  told her no strippers. I put my little toddler foot down and I told
• 1:13:10
  you. And yet there's a stripper with a big old deal. It's stuffed
• 1:13:15
  in a sock and he's waving it around and Analie is loving it. Oh,
• 1:13:19
  she's living her best life. She's like, oh my god, yes,
• 1:13:23
  the last for the rest of your life. Because you can't tell Mama
• 1:13:30
  that Clayton has a big, big honey. Maybe it's thick, okay,
• 1:13:34
  one and a half inches and thick does that like four inches? There's no
• 1:13:39
  four inches on that boy. Maybe maybe three inch three three inches in thick.
• 1:13:44
  Maybe he's a grower. I heard that some guys are like that.
• 1:13:47
  I heard some people. Have you seen his hands? Yes, okay,
• 1:13:50
  I'm just saying I think there's something to that. Like if you have a
• 1:13:54
  little baby, tiny hands, yea, you're gonna have a little baby,
• 1:13:57
  tiny Penis. Okay, So I just don't think so. I think Honiley
• 1:14:00
  knows it. She's had sex with him unfortunately no, and he's going to
• 1:14:05
  get all sad about it and then we're going to see it on the Tell.
• 1:14:08
  So next episode is not the season finale, I know. I'm like,
• 1:14:11
  what are we doing? Well? I have to watch these weddings and
• 1:14:14
  stuff. I know it. It's going to be terrible going to it's gonna
• 1:14:16
  be a two parter. We're gonna have to have two parts for each wedding.
• 1:14:19
  Thank you, like married at first Sight? No thanks? Probably,
• 1:14:23
  maybe we'll have to consolidate some of these episodes maybe, but that's it.
• 1:14:27
  Well, I had fun. Yeah, it's not like I didn't good.
• 1:14:31
  Well, what would anybody do without us? Because we make this shit entertaining
• 1:14:34
  and fun. You're welcome, You're welcome. This is what we do.
• 1:14:38
  This is how we we're alchemists. We turned something shitty into something that's goal,
• 1:14:42
  something trashy into gold. That's right, all right, Well, we'll
• 1:14:45
  be back on Monday Slash Tuesday to talk sister wives again, and then next
• 1:14:49
  week we're getting right into Vanda Pump Rules and also Night a Day Fiance until
• 1:14:55
  then, Beatrice, is there anything else that we need to say to these
• 1:14:58
  beautiful raccoons? Well, if you love our podcast, I sure hope you
• 1:15:01
  go on to your favorite podcast platform and give us a glowing five star review.
• 1:15:06
  We really appreciate it. Thank you so much, and until next time,
• 1:15:10
  never forget that we've got nothing but love for you and peace. Oh my,