Latest / Start Your Comeback: Rebuilding after Divorce, Empty Nest, and Loss of Spouse / Moving Forward: Strategies for Major Life Shifts

Transcript

Moving Forward: Strategies for Major Life Shifts · Start Your Comeback: Rebuilding after Divorce, Empty Nest, and Loss of Spouse

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Is there a major life transition benching you?
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: I know you may be asking what's next?
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: What's my purpose?
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: What if?
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Because I've asked those too.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Start your Comeback Podcast.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: I'm Toni Thrash, a certified life coach, and I want to share the tools and practical steps to help you create a winning game plan to move into your new adventure.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: Hi, welcome back.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: You are listening to episode 37.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: I wanted to take this week and review and recap the last quarter's episodes.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: You may be new here and wonder what this podcast is all about.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: Well, as someone who has recently walked through a couple of major life transitions, this little podcast is here to give you some tools and helpful things as you foresee a transition in your future.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: I've recently had a couple of major transitions come my way and I'm not quite ready to talk about them just yet.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: But they will be episodes soon and I promise to give you all the details.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: But over the last few months I've talked about divorce, retirement, empty nesting and grief.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: I've talked about divorce, retirement, empty nesting and grief.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: The core stages of shock, limbo and re-entry are attached to all three of these transitions.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: You may find yourself in the limbo stage of one, and then another one comes along unannounced, and now you're dealing with shock as well.
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: This is a lot to deal with and it is hard to process out the emotions and the priority of the one that needs to be dealt with first.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: For me, I was expecting one and, completely blindsided by the other, Grief has felt like a thousand pound rock on my chest, Juggling both.
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: I've had to slow down and not rush anything, Just breathe, Take a nap, Eat when I'm hungry.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: You know the drill.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: I wonder what stage of your transition you are in.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: Are you in the shock phase?
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: Regardless if you've planned the transition or knew it was coming, processing it hits differently.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: There is some shock attached because it is now a reality and you have questions, loads of them.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: Also, it is hard to function during this stage, hard to think and make any good decisions, which is exactly why you don't need to make any major decisions when you're in shock.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: But maybe you are in the limbo, stuck in the middle of your transition and still can't move through all the obstacles.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: You don't know when it will end.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: However, your head is a bit clearer and those decisions that need to be made are a bit less confusing to make.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: You are retired, maybe, but stuck in the middle of not knowing what's next, you could be in the last phase, which I call re-entry.
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: You have come out of survival mode into a world that has changed the rules and forgot to let you in on the changes.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: However, the decisions have been made and you feel confident.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: They are solid decisions and you are ready to move forward.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: There are multiple stages within each phase and lots of emotions and feelings.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: Grief may have set in and you find yourself immobilized from fear.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: Let me tell you I know this firsthand it's hard to breathe, sleep, eat and think.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: Also, there are so many what-if questions.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: I typically find those are best left alone because the answer still eludes us.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: You may be filled with doubt about what's next.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: You have zero clue what to do.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: A life coach can certainly help you build a game plan and sort out what is next.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: I've said this before, but I want you to remind you of the questions you need to ask yourself at the end of each month, or especially if you're in the middle of a big, huge transition.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: But if you don't ask them, then at least touch base with yourself at the end of every quarter.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: Here they are, Number one what is not working for you right now, Be specific and then build a plan to change it.
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: If you need a life coach, that's what we're here for, that's what I'm here to help you build that game plan, to help you figure out what is not working right now.
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: Number two what is working for you right now?
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: Then keep doing it, because it is spilling a need for you right now.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Number three what am I procrastinating?
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: What am I avoiding?
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: These problems or issues will not just disappear.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: What game plan do I need to create?
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: Number four this one's a big one for me.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: What am I afraid of?
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: This is a big component of my life, but I can help you with this one.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: You need to just have some stamina and the C word, which is courage.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: By the way, I tell myself this every single day.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: How do I get it?
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: I make a decision and I do it afraid.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: Number five Am I unmotivated and why?
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: Get real with yourself.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: As you answer this one, I want you to sit with each question and write out the obstacles you are seeing for each question.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Be specific, Hold nothing back.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: Be honest with yourself.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: You may find yourself still trying to build a relationship with your kids post-divorce.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: It's been three years.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: You may be an empty nester and don't know what to do with your time now.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: You may have just retired and are just figuring out what you enjoy doing Now.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: No one can stop you.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: You may be waiting through grief that sits on your chest like a boulder.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: You see, the stages and phases of any life transition contain the same elements to a degree.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: You need a game plan and some soul-searching confidence boosting all along the way.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I'm here to help you uncover the right next step in your life.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: Get ready for clarity and confidence as you implement your game plan.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: The reason you need a coach is that for once in your life, someone will believe in you and what you are destined to be.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: Even if you are not quite sure yourself Yet, a coach will get you off the bench and into the game again.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Coaching is a great tool to help you get unstuck and move in the direction of your purpose.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: In the show notes I have a link to my Calendly to book a discovery call.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: Do it, it's free and it's 15 minutes.
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: You can do anything for 15 minutes.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: Come with your questions ready.
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: That's it for this week.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: Join me next week as I introduce my friend Kim to you.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: She's a book marketing guru and a podcast coach.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: I can't wait for you to meet her and hear her story of one of the biggest transitions that has ever happened.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: You're going to love her.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: I'll see you next time.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: Hey, thanks for listening.
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: I don't take it for granted that you're here.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: You didn't listen by mistake.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: If you want to reach out, you can DM me on Instagram at Tony Thrash Until next week.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: Remember, there's still time left on the clock.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: Let's get you off the bench to start your comeback.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: I want to give a special shout out to Country Club for the original music.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: You can find them on Instagram at Country Club.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: You.