Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / 5-MINUTE FRIDAY: The 2 Strategies I Use To Beat Overwhelm
Transcript
- 0:20Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, Emily Abadi here. You are listening to five
- 0:24Speaker 1: Minute Friday from Hurdle. What's up? It is a hectic
- 0:29Speaker 1: weekend here in New York because it is New York
- 0:32Speaker 1: City Marathon weekend, and I am preparing for all things fun.
- 0:37Speaker 1: I've got my first event. I guess this is last
- 0:40Speaker 1: night by the time that you listen to this Thursday
- 0:42Speaker 1: night at the Old Man Run Club pop up, which
- 0:44Speaker 1: is open through the end of the day. On Saturday,
- 0:47Speaker 1: I'm also hosting a shakeout and hang with the folks
- 0:51Speaker 1: from Strava and Together at the Lot. Radio will be
- 0:54Speaker 1: shaken out at nine thirty am and then we will
- 0:57Speaker 1: be having a panel discussion at eleven. I would love
- 1:01Speaker 1: to see you there, and of course cannot forget the
- 1:03Speaker 1: Hurdler Huddle. It is this morning if you're listening to
- 1:06Speaker 1: this in real time at eight thirty am in Flat
- 1:10Speaker 1: Iron at Athleta, So come hang, eat a bagel. Top
- 1:14Speaker 1: of mind right now. What I want to talk to
- 1:16Speaker 1: you about for five Minute Friday is navigating overwhelm Let's
- 1:22Speaker 1: let's be real. I get overwhelmed fairly regularly, but these
- 1:26Speaker 1: days I have strategies in place that help me navigate
- 1:31Speaker 1: this feeling of being out of control. There's a lot
- 1:35Speaker 1: going on. Everything that's happening feels really heavy, I feel anxious,
- 1:39Speaker 1: et cetera. One of these strategies is proactive, and one
- 1:44Speaker 1: of these strategies is reactive. The proactive strategy I have
- 1:48Speaker 1: for navigating overwhelm is starting days that feel like everest,
- 1:53Speaker 1: that feel heavy and like a lot with movement. Now.
- 1:57Speaker 1: Of course, simply lacing up and heading out for a
- 1:59Speaker 1: walk or run is a great thing to do, but
- 2:03Speaker 1: on these days that feel really overwhelming, I almost find
- 2:06Speaker 1: it more helpful to schedule in some sort of group
- 2:11Speaker 1: fitness situation. Maybe that is an actual workout class like
- 2:15Speaker 1: going to a Berry's boot camp, or an Orange Theory
- 2:18Speaker 1: or a hot yoga class, or perhaps it's simply scheduling
- 2:23Speaker 1: a sweat date. But by giving myself a specific time
- 2:27Speaker 1: that this movement needs to happen and then adding an
- 2:30Speaker 1: extra layer of accountability, whether it be because I paid
- 2:34Speaker 1: for a class or I know that someone's relying on
- 2:37Speaker 1: me to do this thing at this time, it guarantees
- 2:41Speaker 1: that I won't shove this off because of my overwhelm.
- 2:45Speaker 1: I know, without a doubt for a fact that I
- 2:48Speaker 1: will feel better after moving my body and getting those
- 2:52Speaker 1: endorphins first thing in the morning. It really lays the foundation.
- 2:56Speaker 1: It's a keystone habit for me to feel better in
- 2:59Speaker 1: my body as the day goes on and that inevitable
- 3:02Speaker 1: overwhelm kicks in. Now. The second thing that I do
- 3:05Speaker 1: when I am struggling with overwhelm, the reactive thing, is
- 3:11Speaker 1: I take to my notes app even better if I
- 3:13Speaker 1: can take to an actual piece of paper and a
- 3:15Speaker 1: pen right, and in the exercise that I do, I
- 3:19Speaker 1: write down all the things that I'm thinking and feeling. So,
- 3:23Speaker 1: say it's one o'clock in the afternoon, I feel like
- 3:26Speaker 1: my to do list is a mile long. By writing
- 3:29Speaker 1: down where I'm at and being able to look at
- 3:33Speaker 1: my thoughts and feelings on paper, I am then able
- 3:36Speaker 1: to tackle one thing at a time to see what
- 3:39Speaker 1: is fact what is fiction. It's an important opportunity to
- 3:43Speaker 1: then go through the reframe. Rather than saying the sentence
- 3:48Speaker 1: I am overwhelmed, shift it to I feel overwhelmed, passing
- 3:53Speaker 1: through me right, knowing that it is not a permanent state,
- 3:58Speaker 1: that it is temporary, and then you have the opportunity
- 4:02Speaker 1: to decide how you are going to act and move
- 4:07Speaker 1: through that state of overwhelm. So my two strategies again
- 4:11Speaker 1: moving my body first thing in the morning, ideally a
- 4:14Speaker 1: committed movement, whether with a friend or a dedicated class.
- 4:18Speaker 1: And then the second strategy writing things down, doing some
- 4:22Speaker 1: sort of a brain dump, having a moment to let
- 4:25Speaker 1: go of everything without judgment whatsoever, separate the facts from
- 4:29Speaker 1: the feelings, and then come up with some sort of
- 4:32Speaker 1: an action plan on how I can move forward and
- 4:34Speaker 1: have grace with myself. Something else that I've spoken about
- 4:38Speaker 1: on the pod, and I'll throw this in kind of
- 4:40Speaker 1: as a cherry on top to navigating overwhelm is a
- 4:43Speaker 1: breath work exercise. So I'm a huge fan of the
- 4:47Speaker 1: box breath that's inhale for four, hold at the top
- 4:50Speaker 1: for four, exhale for four, hold at the bottom for four.
- 4:55Speaker 1: I'll do a box breath for one minute. I'll send
- 4:57Speaker 1: a timer on my iPhone. And as much as I
- 4:59Speaker 1: love using the open app, just doing this format it
- 5:04Speaker 1: takes out the guesswork for me, especially when it feels
- 5:08Speaker 1: like if I have to add one more thing into
- 5:10Speaker 1: the mix, if I have to tap one more icon,
- 5:13Speaker 1: or do one more thing, or do one more scroll
- 5:15Speaker 1: that I'm going to lose it. You don't need to
- 5:18Speaker 1: lose it. You've got this. And remember again I said this,
- 5:21Speaker 1: but overwhelm is just something that passes through you. It
- 5:26Speaker 1: will pass. I cannot emphasize that enough. So know that
- 5:31Speaker 1: you are capable of handling whatever's on your to do list,
- 5:34Speaker 1: whatever is in front of you, wherever you're at. Know
- 5:37Speaker 1: that you will be able to get over this hurdle.
- 5:42Speaker 1: My question for you this week, and I'm really curious
- 5:45Speaker 1: about this. I would love it if you tag me
- 5:47Speaker 1: with your responses over on social How do you navigate overwhelm?
- 5:51Speaker 1: What do you do when life feels heavy? And now
- 5:55Speaker 1: a listener question.
- 5:56Speaker 2: Hy Emily often talk about your community, your friends, and
- 6:00Speaker 2: the people that keep you going, But I was wondering
- 6:03Speaker 2: if you ever had a friendship breakup intentional or unintentional,
- 6:07Speaker 2: and have you dealt with it?
- 6:09Speaker 1: Thanks oh Man. Friend breakups are really challenging. I would
- 6:13Speaker 1: argue that they're more difficult than romantic breakups. I had
- 6:17Speaker 1: my first friend breakup, I would say about eight years ago,
- 6:20Speaker 1: when I found out that someone that I really trusted
- 6:23Speaker 1: and was a close friend of mine at the time
- 6:26Speaker 1: was seeing the same person that I was seeing and
- 6:29Speaker 1: didn't tell me. I had absolutely no idea. It was
- 6:33Speaker 1: truly truly wild in that experience. I just let her
- 6:38Speaker 1: know that I was really hurt and I was incapable
- 6:43Speaker 1: of continuing on in a relationship with her. And despite
- 6:46Speaker 1: being really hurt and also knowing what I needed to
- 6:49Speaker 1: do for myself, it didn't make the breakup any easier
- 6:52Speaker 1: because I missed her in my life. I knew, however,
- 6:55Speaker 1: that there would be and that there are people that
- 7:00Speaker 1: value me and everything that I bring to the table,
- 7:03Speaker 1: and those are the people that I want to pour into.
- 7:06Speaker 1: Those are the people that deserve my energy. I have
- 7:10Speaker 1: since that first friend breakup had less dramatic friend breakups.
- 7:15Speaker 1: Let's say, whether it be that two people just kind
- 7:18Speaker 1: of grow in different directions, or perhaps you start to
- 7:22Speaker 1: realize that maybe you have different values or priorities than
- 7:26Speaker 1: you once did, that the way that you are moving
- 7:29Speaker 1: forward is a little bit different now, and that's okay.
- 7:33Speaker 1: Know that it can be both. You can mourn the
- 7:36Speaker 1: ending of a relationship and also know that it is
- 7:40Speaker 1: the right thing for you to do. There are different
- 7:43Speaker 1: ways to approach a friend breakup. You can either address
- 7:46Speaker 1: it or if you feel as though you're simply growing
- 7:49Speaker 1: in different directions. Maybe there doesn't need to be some
- 7:52Speaker 1: sort of big conversation. If you do feel as though
- 7:57Speaker 1: you need to step away from a friendship, I would
- 8:01Speaker 1: do it in the way that you would hope someone
- 8:03Speaker 1: would do it for you, which means that and I
- 8:06Speaker 1: have done this in the past. I have said something like, listen,
- 8:10Speaker 1: I have to exercise my boundaries right now, and I'm
- 8:13Speaker 1: just going through a lot in this moment, and this
- 8:18Speaker 1: relationship isn't one that I can really pour into at
- 8:22Speaker 1: this time. I know that's not easy to hear, and
- 8:25Speaker 1: it hasn't been an easy thing for me to say.
- 8:28Speaker 1: But as difficult as that initial breakup period has been
- 8:32Speaker 1: for me in the past, I can say for certain
- 8:36Speaker 1: that I am better for trusting my gut and moving
- 8:38Speaker 1: forward in a way that is best for Emily. That
- 8:41Speaker 1: is the you know, the sentence that I've been working
- 8:43Speaker 1: on this year, the question that I keep asking myself
- 8:46Speaker 1: what is best for Emily? What is the thing that's
- 8:50Speaker 1: going to make me feel better? Sometimes we get wrapped
- 8:52Speaker 1: up in relationships because we feel as though we should
- 8:56Speaker 1: be doing something, we should be showing up for someone,
- 8:58Speaker 1: we should be the person that they can call, even
- 9:01Speaker 1: when doing those things doesn't make us feel good, that
- 9:05Speaker 1: time has passed, that friendship has perhaps run its course.
- 9:09Speaker 1: And so I tell you that, yes, friendship breakups are hard,
- 9:14Speaker 1: and yes, you are worthy of people that make you
- 9:17Speaker 1: feel full and excited and good and that build up
- 9:20Speaker 1: your energy, and that with time, no matter how difficult
- 9:24Speaker 1: a friend breakup is, you will recover and you'll be
- 9:28Speaker 1: better for it. That's it for this week. Make sure
- 9:31Speaker 1: you're following along with Hurdle over on social It's at
- 9:33Speaker 1: Hurdle Podcast. I'm over at Emily Abody. I'll see you
- 9:37Speaker 1: out there this week in New York, another hurdle conquered.
- 9:40Speaker 1: Catch you guys next time