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5-MINUTE FRIDAY: Intentional Rest Isn't Selfish · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Hey, everyone. Emily Abadi here.
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: You are listening to 5-Minute Friday on Hurdle. I'm having
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: a laugh because you might be listening to this. You
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: might be watching this. And if you're watching this, then
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: you see my background is not my usual situation.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: I am.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: Here in Fiji.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: Wild.
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: Things I didn't anticipate when starting a podcast, recording a
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: podcast from Fiji. We came here, me and my friend Ashley,
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: the day after the Sydney Marathon. I've got a recap
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: coming for you soon, so do not fret. We came
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: here the day after the Sydney Marathon. It was about
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: a four-hour flight from Sydney to Fiji.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: Fiji.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: And when I tell you this is a piece of
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: heaven on earth, that is the biggest understatement. We splurged.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: We went for what they call an overwater bure. And
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: so we have our own hut over the water. I'm
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: staring at... I don't even want to say crystal clear blue.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: It's like turquoise water right now. It's absolutely stunning. And
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: this has been the most essential recovery... period, post-race or not,
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: it has been such a reminder for me that it
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: doesn't need to be going to a place like Fiji,
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: but scheduling in more intentional space like this, I think
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: is something that I want to be very cognizant.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: Of as I move forward.
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: I always try to be relatively good about making sure
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: I give myself time to to recharge after big moments.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: But I think what the goal is now is being
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: even more intentional with that. So what I say with
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: that is that I know, for instance, that New York
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: City Marathon Week for me is always a really big
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: week in that I'm hosting a lot of different things.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: I'm really stepping into my power as an energy dealer.
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: And so once that moment is over and there is
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: that come down, the best thing that I can do
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: for myself is give myself a moment of intentional recalibration.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: And so asking myself, what is it that I can
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: do so that I can recharge my batteries? What is
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: it that I can do so that I can show
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: up as my best self? And I think the issue
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: that I've had in years past is I am the
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: kind of person who is really good at without a
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: second thought showing up for others. So you need me
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: to step in and help watch your three-year-old?
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: No problem.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: You want me to show up and be the person
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: that helps throw a bridal shower every single day. I
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: am there to do everything for everyone else at every
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: single moment, but I'm not always good at putting my
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: own oxygen mask on first. What I know is that
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: putting my own oxygen mask on first is the thing
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: that's going to help me not only show up for
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: others better, but of course... show up for myself you
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: can't pour from an empty cup and there have been
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: so many times in my life where I have made
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: every effort to pour every last ounce of the cup
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: out before giving it a second to refill and so
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: this moment this trip here in Fiji right now is
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: reminding me just the importance of doing that and I
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: want to be really intentional about doing that moving forward
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: I know you're all probably wondering, okay, tell us about
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: the marathon. And like I said, I promise you, there
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: is a recap coming. But in the meantime, oh, wow.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: So there's a surf competition that's happening. And I think
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: they're announcing some things in the distance. This is what's
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: happening here in Fiji. But yeah, this week on 5-Minute Friday,
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: I'm just talking all about intentional resetting, about that importance
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: of really pouring into your own cup so that you
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: can show up and be the best version of yourself.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Yourself.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: We hear it all the time. Self-care isn't selfish. And
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: if you're like me, again, that can be a hard
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: pill to swallow. But just know, it's okay. As I
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: stare at the beach that I'm going to be laying
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: on later, as I think about the, oh my god,
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: a crisp Diet Coke in the It's been a really
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: nice couple of days. After this, I head back to Australia.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: I have some time in Melbourne next week, then a
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: work weekend in LA before coming back here and spending
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: about 10 to 12.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Days in Bondi Beach.
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: So if you have any recommendations for me, anything that
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: I should know, restaurants, things to do, things to see,
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: I'm all ears. Shoot me a DM over on social.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: It's over at hurdlepodcast.emilyabadi. And of course, you can always
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: email me over at hello at hurdle.us. My listener prompt
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: for you this week, how can you take care of you?
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  Speaker 2: What are you doing to put your own oxygen mask
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: on first? And I wanna hear about it. So like
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: I said, hit me over the DMs, hit me in
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: the email, okay? And now let's get to a listener question.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: This week's listener question comes from Ella. Ella says, hey, Emily,
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: I play volleyball and recently I've been struggling with the
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: mental aspect of it. I get in my head by
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: comparing myself or putting too much pressure on myself to
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: prove to others that I'm a good player.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: What should I do to help with this?
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  Speaker 2: And how can I train my mental in sports? Thanks
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: so much, Ella. Oh, Ella, I want to prove to
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: other people that I'm a good player. That is the
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: first thing that we've got to flip the script on, right?
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  Speaker 2: Because you're playing volleyball because it's something that you enjoy.
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: You're not playing volleyball for other people. So this is
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: entirely relatable. We want to show up. We want to
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: put our best foot forward. We want others to see
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: our greatness. It is so understandable that you feel this way.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: And you have an opportunity to reclaim this space for yourself.
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: So when you show up on the court, rather than
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: focusing your attention on what do other people think, ask yourself,
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: what is it that I can do in this match
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: today that makes me feel good, that makes me feel
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: like my best player? Maybe it is showing up and
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: exercising a skill in a certain way. It is communicating
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: effectively with your teammates. What is the thing that you
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: can do so that you put that emphasis back on
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  Speaker 2: how can I feel like my best self and worrying
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: less about that external validation? You want to bring that internal, okay? Also,
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: when we talk about resetting in the match, in the game,
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: that's a really big opportunity for yourself. And a lot
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: of the best athletes out there, they have some sort
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: of a physical anchor. You've probably seen this with some
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: of the greats, especially right now as we see the
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: US Open tennis playing. There are different players that bounce
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: the ball a certain amount of times before they go
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: to serve for a point. Or maybe they touch the
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: back of their ear or they wipe their knee or something.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: So maybe for you to come back into your body,
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: to come back into checking how is it that I'm
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: feeling as Ella, you can have some sort of a
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: physical anchor. To kind of reset in between points. Again,
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: it can be something so small as like touching your
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: ear or brushing off your shoulder or tapping your finger
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: on your thigh three times. Whatever it is, that grounds
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: you in your physical body and allows you to come
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: back into your own. I cannot say this enough. so
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: understandable that you want people to see your greatness. And
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: I'm sure there is so much.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: Of it to go around.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: But know that you're playing this game for you. And
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: you owe it to yourself to do the best that
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: you can to enjoy it for yourself, to be proud
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: of yourself. Because when you're proud of yourself, that external validation,
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: it's not going to matter so much.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: Signing off from Fiji. Again, not something that I thought
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: that I would ever do here. Emily Abadi over on
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: Insta at Hurdle Podcast. Email me over at hello at hurdle.us.
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: Say hi, send a listener question. And if you are
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: on the YouTube, like, comment, subscribe, send this to somebody else.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: I want to get them in the bubble. I want
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: them to be a hurdler too. Another hurdle conquered. Catch
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: you guys next time.