Latest / Wedding Pros who are ready to grow - with Becca Pountney / Are you falling out of love with your wedding business?

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Are you falling out of love with your wedding business? · Wedding Pros who are ready to grow - with Becca Pountney

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Kelly: As entrepreneurs, as business owners, it's really common, isn't
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it, to wear multiple hats and to do different things and some, sometimes
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it's right to do multiple things together and, and always do that.
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And sometimes it's a, a transition where one is taking over from the other and I
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think, yeah, it throws up its challenges for sure, but it's often really rewarding.
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Becca: I am Becca Pountney, wedding business marketing expert,
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speaker and blogger, and you are listening to The Wedding Pros
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who are Ready to Grow podcast.
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I'm here to share with you actionable tips, strategies, and real life
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examples to help you take your wedding business to the next level.
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If you are an ambitious wedding business owner that wants to take your passion
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and use it to build a profitable, sustainable business doing what you
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love, then you're in the right place.
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Let's get going with today's episode.
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Today I'm joined by my wedding industry friend Kelly Chandler.
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Previously, a successful wedding planner, Kelly now works with wedding
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venues, helping them to make more money from their land and property.
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With two decades of experience in the wedding industry, Kelly's passionate
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about unlocking, unblocking, and championing the potential of her clients.
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Kelly it's so good to have you here.
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Welcome to the podcast.
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Kelly: Thank you so much for having me.
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Really, really delighted to be here.
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Becca: It's an absolute pleasure.
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I dunno why I haven't had you on sooner, because I absolutely
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love working with you.
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So I'm so glad we finally managed to get it in the diary and I've
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got you on the podcast today.
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Now, today we're gonna be talking about a little bit of a different subject.
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We're gonna be talking about what happens when people fall out of
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love with their wedding businesses.
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But before we get into that, I wanna go right back to the start of your journey.
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As I said in the intro, you started off as a wedding planner, so go right back.
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In your mind, how did you end up working in this wonderful world
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of weddings in the first place?
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Kelly: Yeah, great.
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Great question and it's, it is good timing as well, because actually
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this year I celebrate 20 years in the wedding industry, which.
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Feels quite, quite significant.
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And if you'd asked me 20 years ago, would I be working in weddings, I
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that would not have been, that would not have been what I was thinking.
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So, yeah, how did I get into it?
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So I, I was working in event management, conference and incentive travel actually
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for a few years after I left university.
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I studied languages, I studied French at university, always
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loved travel people, events.
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Bit of an organizing gene in me in terms of getting stuff done.
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So I fell, I, I guess I fell into event management.
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But then an opportunity came up with a very good friend of mine
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who'd been made redundant actually.
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She, she'd worked in corporate and she was made redundant.
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And she had this idea of she wanted to be a wedding planner.
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And basically she approached me as a really good friend and said,
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you work in event management.
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Do you fancy a change?
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Do you, wouldn't, would you like to be, you know, your own boss rather
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than working for someone else?
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And.
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To be very honest, we didn't give it that much thought and we just lept and did it.
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And that's how I started with, with a then business partner
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who is still a dear friend.
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But yeah, it was.
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It was just like that.
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Becca: Wow.
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So you really did take the leap, because we talk a lot on this podcast
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about how people take the leap out of employment, how they become self-employed,
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how they get over those hurdles of feeling like it's an impossible dream.
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So how did you make that decision?
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Or did you really just leap blindly?
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Kelly: Well, It was, it was, in all honesty, leaping blindly.
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It wasn't quite, I hadn't quite intended the leap to be quite as much of a leap
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as it was because my intention had been to basically do two, you know, to to
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continue with my event management job and then assess up the wedding business.
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But as it transpired, reducing down hours was not gonna be an option.
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Trying to do both was not gonna be an option.
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There was a lot of travel in that, in that role as it was.
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And basically I was facing a decision either go with this business or.
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Or stick with your, you know, full-time event management role.
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So I went with it.
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I did, I, I became freelance.
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So I did do both.
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I didn't just kind of completely leap into weddings, but I did leave the employed.
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The employed world and haven't returned for 20 years.
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Becca: Yeah.
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Wow.
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Incredible.
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So talk to me then about your wedding planning.
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How did you find it?
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Did you enjoy it?
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Was the business successful?
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How did it work out?
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Kelly: It was a huge learning curve.
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Utterly huge, as you can imagine, from what I said, without having
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done much planning, without having properly researched it.
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Totally stick my hands up to all of that.
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20 years ago, it was tough going and the ideas of it growing, you
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know, growing fast were not, did not transpire, but we stuck at it.
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The first couple of years were incredibly difficult.
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Turned a corner after sort of three years, but it was a, it was a, it
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was a tough time, but a time that we.
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Absolutely loved and had fun and just, yeah, just enjoyed every
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day and some of, yeah, I have some amazing memories of those of those
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early years that I look back on.
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Becca: And one of the things I love about having guests on this podcast, Kelly,
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is hearing more about people's stories.
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And I think often people can look at you or look at me and think,
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wow, look at their amazing life.
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Look at the job that they're doing now.
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But what they don't see is, All of the steps that came before that.
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So talk to me about how you came out of wedding planning and how
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you ended up where you are now.
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Was it just that it got exhausting?
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Did you fall out of love with it?
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What happened?
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Kelly: Mm, so this is sort of fast forward quite a few years.
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I've set up the wedding planning business 2003, about 20 14, 20 15.
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Things were just kind of changing a little bit and I was just
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feeling, I, I didn't quite.
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Didn't quite have the, the total love as much as I'd had back in, back
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in the day, and it took me a long time to, to recognize it actually.
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But I was feeling just not, my energy just wasn't, wasn't quite right on it.
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And it was also coinciding with lots of other changes going on in life with
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family and children and what have you.
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And yeah, basically I, this was quite a, you know, this wasn't an
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immediate transition, but I found business was getting tougher for
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me in terms of, I wasn't getting.
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The jobs that I wanted, the weddings that I necessarily aspired
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to, and I was just finding it.
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Whereas it had been, you know, I mean it's always, it's always, you always have
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to work at getting business, but it was just feeling like a, a bit of a slog.
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And I, I didn't realize it at the time, but I was.
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Ultimately not necessarily loving it as much and probably not giving out.
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Now, I now recognize several years down the line was not giving out the
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right vibe and the right energy for, for kind of what that needed to happen.
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It also, it coincided very fortunately, and sometimes these things, if you look
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and listen for them, are out there.
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It, it coincided with me being asked by venues, a couple of
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venues, wedding venues that I had.
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Worked with in bringing weddings to couple of clients that I'd
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worked with and bought several weddings to over the previous years.
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Got in touch with me and one of them asked me to do a training
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for their sort of in-house team.
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And the other asked me to come and have a look at their venue spaces in terms
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of helping them grow the business and grow the bookings and look at how they
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could and how they could be better.
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And that was the first time that I had.
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Had even considered that I could be a consultant or I could work on, shall we
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say more the business side of weddings.
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And those two things happened at what I now know or have known for
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quite a few years was a really good time for me because I was ready for.
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A transition and a change.
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So long answer there Becca.
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Becca: No, that's absolutely fine.
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So what's interesting in what you said is, and I think this is quite often the
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case when we look back on situations, is that it took you a little while to
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realize that that's what was happening and that you were falling in out of
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love with the business that you had.
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If people are listening to this and thinking, I'm not sure if
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this is where I'm at, what signs, what sort of things should they be
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looking at to know whether or not.
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They are falling out with their business out of love with their business,
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whether they're just exhausted.
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Kelly: Mm-hmm.
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Yeah, and that's, that's a great question.
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Particularly at this moment in time that we are recording, I see lots of people
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over 2022 have worked an incredible year and, and exhaustion and just.
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Doing too much over because of, you know, post pandemic is, is certainly
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a thing in terms of what to look for though, if it's more than a,
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more than temporary exhaustion.
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Is, is just, is, is really paying attention to how you are feeling
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when some of the smaller things are happening, you know, how are you.
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How are you reacting to new inquiries coming in?
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You know, how are you reacting to emails coming in from clients?
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How are you feeling when you deliver a job?
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You know how really paying attention and asking yourself and sitting honestly
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and thinking about some of those things.
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I think I pushed a lot of stuff under the carpet.
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You know, I had, if I was listening to my guts a little bit more.
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I would've picked up on those subtle kind of, mm.
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Do you know what, I'm not feeling as excited as I should be when that, you
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know, I've got that meeting lined up to go and talk about that new wedding,
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or I'm just you know, it's not kind of working for me that I'm going into
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London, you know, three evenings a week.
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You know, and I was, I wasn't honest with myself for, for a long time that
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actually some of the, the realities of the role or realities of what
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I'm doing just wasn't giving me.
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The right feelings and I, I think it's actually, in terms of giving
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someone advice, it's actually sitting and honestly thinking about that.
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I do, I mean, I do many practices as I, as I'm, I'm now a, a, a coach
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and I've worked with many coaches and I've done a lot of work on my
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mindset and personal development over the last sort of six or seven years.
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And one of my practices is to sit journaling and I do a lot of.
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Writing out my feelings and giving myself a bit of time and space to do that is
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something that I never used to do before.
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You're always rushing onto the next thing quick quick quick.
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Do everything, you know, get on with the to-do list, and actually sometimes
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sitting and writing out or thinking out some of the things that, some of those
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subtle little things that might be going on and listening, listening to what.
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You know, you're being, you are telling yourself or what your gut is telling you.
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Becca: Yeah.
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And I think sometimes that internal monologue can be hard
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for us as well though, can't it?
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Because I know when I've had discussions with people who are
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kind of in a similar situation, they're battling these feelings.
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Part of them is thinking, if I stop what I'm doing right now, people
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are gonna see me as a failure.
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People are gonna think that I've not done a good job, that I've
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failed at this business, even though that might not be the case.
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And then on the other hand, they're also struggling with these feelings of.
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Well, if I wanna step into something new, how should I, am I an imposter?
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Should I be doing this?
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Should I, like, are people gonna laugh at me?
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So how, how did you deal with all of those different feelings?
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Does that resonate and how did you move past those and make decisions about
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what to do about your wedding planning and how to step into the next stage?
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Kelly: Yeah, so it's a great question and.
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Absolutely.
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I had all of those things in terms of how can I move from having done this thing?
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Should I, what are people gonna think?
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And then, well, how can I just become a consultant?
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How can I go and do that?
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And you know, who am I to do that?
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And all of those things and that, that took.
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I probably sat with a lot of that for at least a year, maybe longer,
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because this was all, you know, it was all happening and, and actually,
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I mean, in hindsight, I so should have got on with that, you know, quicker.
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But we do, we often procrastinate and hold ourselves back.
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How did I take.
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The steps forward.
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Probably two key things.
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Actually.
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One of, one of the real sort of catalysts that I can sort of, you
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know, have in my, in my head was I went, I invested in, conference day.
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It was a training day.
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It was with the UK Alliance of Wedding Planners, actually, and
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I hadn't, you know, bear in mind, this is seven, eight years ago.
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There weren't necessarily so many industry events, learning events
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out there for, for planners.
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But this was a, a business, a really business focused planner's day.
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And I went to that event and there were a couple of speakers there that really
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made me think, one of them was a coach.
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And she really made me think actually, Kelly, it's time to grow.
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It's time to do something.
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It's time basically.
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And I came out of that day, it took me about another nine months to actually
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hire her one-to-one and work with her.
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But it was the first step, actually, for me, the first step was to getting some
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help within my existing wedding planning business to help me delegate some of the
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things that I didn't want to do or that other people could do better than me.
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And that was a bit of a catalyst for that.
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So I guess I, I put myself in a position where, I opened up to other people and,
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and I would say that that conference day was the beginning and then I think that.
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The other part of it for me was because I'd had a couple of venues actually
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approach me and asked me to consult for them, and one of them in particular gave
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such brilliant feedback in terms of what they'd gained and how they benefited and
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how their business was on a best footing.
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I was like, okay, and I just.
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Had to believe.
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You know, I had the, and this is definitely one of my tips.
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I have my wall of testimonials of those, you know, good things that people have
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said, and I still do this to this day.
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You know, you, I print out those things.
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I've, I actually haven't got them at the moment, but I used to have them framed.
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And I, and I certainly remember back in those early days, really looking at
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those testimonials and whenever the old imposter would come in saying, Kelly,
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you can't do this, you can't do this.
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It'd be like, look what these people have said.
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So
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Becca: yes, I a hundred percent I'm with you on that.
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And what I do now as well is I've actually.
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Added a highlight on my Instagram called kind words, and I share
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my testimonials onto that so that whenever I'm having a moment I can
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go back on there and I can just see them all flick past me on my screen
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and I can re-share them to my story.
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Just to make myself think.
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Actually, yes, Becky, you do know what you're talking about.
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Exactly.
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Are good at what you do.
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Exactly.
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And here's the proof, here's what other people have said.
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But I think that's important for people to know that even me and even you, Kelly,
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when we go out there and we're talking on stages, we still all have these struggles.
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We all have these doubts and we're all finding ways to deal with them.
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All of the time.
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Kelly: Always it's, it's how you.
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You know, there'll always be for most people that, that there's
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elements of doubt and self-doubt and all of those things, but it's
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how we recover from it and how, what you do to combat it, isn't it?
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I had a good somebody, this isn't, I'm gonna, this isn't me that's invented this
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phrase, but I heard it from from another coach actually, and I really liked it.
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She has what she calls her vault of validation.
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I thought it was kind of like, you know, wall of fame or vault
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of validation was what she used.
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I thought it was quite good.
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Becca: I, I love that.
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That's, that's really, really good.
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So did your businesses coexist for a while then?
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Did you do both businesses at the same time?
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How did that work and how did you balance both things and when did you decide
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to just go fully into the consultancy?
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Kelly: Yeah, absolutely.
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Yes.
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I balanced both for a couple of years, actually, pretty
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much, yeah, for, for two years.
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And then I decided in 2017 to go.
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Fully into, into venue consulting.
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And then of course I, you know, I do do two things now in terms of
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other, I think, you know, it's, as entrepreneurs, as business owners,
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it's really common, isn't it, to where.
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Multiple hats and to do different things and some, sometimes it's
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right to do multiple things together and, and always do that.
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And sometimes it's a, a transition where one is taking over from the
16:05
other and I think, yeah, it throws up its challenges for sure, but it's
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often, it's often, really rewarding.
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Becca: So yes, and we need that spark, don't we?
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I think as entrepreneurs we get bored easily, and we're always looking for
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the next thing, the next excitement.
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So if people are listening to this and they're thinking, actually, a
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lot of this stuff's resonating with me and I am looking at my business
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right now, and I'm not quite happy that it's what I want to be doing.
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Have you got any tips for people about how they take a step forward?
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How do they start looking to redesign either the business they've already
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got or perhaps a new venture?
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Kelly: Yeah, I think the first thing is, is recognizing it
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and not ignoring the signs.
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There's certainly, I did for quite a while, but it's then looking at,
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it's really again, spending the time to sit down and look at, okay,
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what, what do I would I want to do?
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And if that isn't, you know, isn't an obvious, actually, it's sort
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of rewinding it a little bit.
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Looking at skills and looking at the things that you are, that you
17:03
are good at or that you enjoy doing.
17:05
And also looking at the practicalities of.
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Because what I see some people doing is creating something new that actually
17:13
gives them even less time, for example, or doesn't, doesn't necessarily tick the
17:18
box of what they're trying to aim for.
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So I mean, one of the pieces of work I, I often do when I'm coaching a client, and
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we do some of the sort of inner work, is we look at people's values and looking
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really deeply at what is important.
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To each person, and we're all different in life.
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So for me, one of my values is flexibility.
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So for me, being an entrepreneur, being a business owner, and working from home
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as I do, I've got to have flexibility.
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And flexibility to me means being able to take, you know, the time off to
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attend my daughter's assemblies, or being able to take a holiday day and, and.
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Being flexible with my workload.
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So flexibility is, is, is, you know, is one thing, but we all have different
18:00
values and for some people it's, you know, it many, many other things.
18:04
So I think it's actually getting going quite deep actually with
18:07
yourself and really looking at what.
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What is important to me at my core, because anything new that you create, you
18:15
want to make sure that you're creating it.
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That it ticks those boxes and it plays to those values that it isn't in conflict.
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You know, there's, because often we can be tempted to go, of course, we all.
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You know, need and want to earn money.
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You know, fact, most people need, most people need to.
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But we also, as, as business owners and entrepreneurs want, have the
18:36
opportunity to create something that does also you know, play to, to
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what we want out of life and values.
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And so for most people, it's not purely money.
18:44
So I would say actually doing some deep work to really find out what matters
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and making sure that anything new doesn't run in contradiction to that.
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Becca: Yeah, I think that's really important because it can be easy for
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people to have new ideas and see shiny objects and start running after something
18:59
and then realize that's actually not fulfilling the gap that they had.
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And also for some people it might not be starting something new.
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It might be just looking at what they already have and
19:08
taking it in a new direction.
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I dunno if you've got any examples of people you've seen
19:12
doing something like that.
19:14
Kelly: Yeah, I mean, I think it's often looking at ultimately what,
19:18
you know, a lot, a lot of businesses I work with, you know, our service
19:22
is, is they're heavily service based.
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So it's actually, it's not necessarily about creating a new product, but
19:28
it can be about how do we look after, how do we look after the
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client, how can we change that up?
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And you know, sometimes then I totally stick my hand up for it.
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You know, you get.
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Stuck in a, we always do it this way.
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This is the way we've always done it.
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And I think, I think most people can, can see how that, how that happens.
19:44
But there is an opportunity to think, actually, you know what, I can break
19:48
this down and do this in other ways.
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It could be a wedding planner who, you know, actually, you know,
19:54
instead of offering a, you know, full planning services is if it
19:58
may well suit to break that down and offer a slightly more packaged.
20:03
You know, slightly more packaged service or elements of planning
20:06
that sort of works a bit.
20:07
Now, that may not work for, that may not work for some and I know from a planning
20:10
point of view, the kind of full plan is the holy grail of, you know, larger
20:14
fees, larger budgets, all of that.
20:15
But it doesn't always, it's not always the way and it's not necessarily always
20:19
the way that will work for every person.
20:21
And I know quite a few very successful businesses that
20:25
have really sort of worked a.
20:28
Their business and in terms of how they wedding plan to actually suit their life
20:32
and, and what, and what they want and, and whether they want a, a team and, and
20:36
how they structure their, their time.
20:39
So I think it can be shaking up, not necessarily creating a new
20:42
thing, but how you, how you service clients, if that makes sense.
20:46
Becca: Yeah, and I think it's an ongoing process and I think we need to not feel
20:49
guilty about that, and I think we need to do that kind of deep work you're
20:52
talking about regularly, because what I see is that as people go through
20:56
different life stages, much like you talked about sometimes people getting
20:59
married, having children, you know, got elderly parents moving house husbands, or.
21:04
Partners who've got different work, all different kinds of stresses that go on,
21:08
and suddenly our priorities can change.
21:10
And often that means that our business does need to change with it.
21:14
And I think it's not feeling guilty about that because I see people racked with
21:18
so much guilt that they wanna do all these things, but their priorities have
21:21
changed and they feel like they've failed.
21:23
But it's.
21:24
I don't know if you've got any thoughts about how to kind of
21:26
reprocess that in their mind rather than feeling like a big failure.
21:30
Kelly: Yeah, I think that's, it's a huge, it's a huge area.
21:34
I mean, my, my belief on things is you can do.
21:37
We can do great things, and I see brilliant entrepreneurs, business people
21:41
doing great things, but we can't do all of the things at the same time.
21:45
And I think there's a whole, there's so much messaging out there
21:49
about, you know, achieving this and being the perfect parent and
21:53
the perfect business that it, it's.
21:56
You know, it's an impossible, an impossible task to do all
22:00
of the things all of the time.
22:02
I think obviously it is tough with that narrative going on in the background.
22:05
You know, we, it, it is tough to, to, you know, overcome it and to ignore it
22:11
and do our own thing, but I, but I do think there are, it is about accepting
22:15
that it's a bit, you know, this, I, I don't subscribe to the whole kind
22:19
of work life balance thing because I think that always makes us feel.
22:24
Guilty if one that one thing is, is kind of balancing and the other one is, you
22:29
know, one is up, one is down, and that's
22:31
that's, you know, the whole sort of guilt thing comes in.
22:35
I sort of, I think ultimately life is a blend.
22:38
And you know, there will be sometimes when you really push in business and there'll
22:44
be sometimes where you actually need to just kind of, you know, jog along a little
22:48
bit and do things a bit more slowly.
22:50
And where family, for example, or where, you know, health or friendships or,
22:56
you know, supporting others or whatever that might be kind of comes to the fore.
22:59
And yeah, it's, it's, it's not, it, it's not an easy one to get over the,
23:04
the feelings if I should be doing it all, but actually, You know, it's, you
23:10
know, I also very much look, let's.
23:12
Let's be here for the long term.
23:14
I mean, I'm really proud of the fact I'm still in the
23:16
wedding industry after 20 years.
23:17
And you know, I think it's, I do I do see some people really crash
23:21
and burn because they, they do just exhaust themselves burn out on all
23:26
levels, and that is just such a shame.
23:28
So I think trying to be sustainable and, and and, and.
23:34
And sort of realistic, but I know it is, it's a difficult, I don't have the magic
23:38
fairy one to kind of make people not, you know, to, to get, necessarily get rid of,
23:44
of those feelings of trying to do it all.
23:46
But I just think it's, it's also not subscribing to the.
23:49
The messaging out there that you know from people that that
23:51
claim that they can, I don't know anyone that's got it all sorted?
23:56
Becca: No, absolutely not.
23:57
And if they say they have, then they probably are not telling us the truth.
24:00
And I think for me, practically how I deal with this kind of
24:04
thing is trying to ground myself.
24:07
In reality because I think we can all get carried away.
24:10
We can all get comparisonitis.
24:12
We can see people online doing amazing things or saying that
24:15
they're making lots of money or traveling the world in jet setting.
24:19
And whenever I kind of go off on one of those tangents thinking,
24:21
oh, I wish my life was like that.
24:23
I have to ground myself and remember.
24:25
Right.
24:25
What was my original why?
24:27
My original why was because I wanted to be able to pick my children up from school.
24:31
So if I'm jet setting off all around the world, every week of the year,
24:34
I'm actually losing the original why.
24:36
So as glamorous as that looks, what is it for me in my life
24:40
with my family around me?
24:42
What is the reason I started this business and why do I want that?
24:45
And actually that's more important than some of the shiny
24:48
things we see on Instagram.
24:49
I dunno if you have any practical things you do for yourself.
24:52
As well.
24:52
Kelly: Yeah, absolutely.
24:53
And I think, you know, the, the whole comparisonitis thing crops up, you
24:58
know, again, it crops up at all stages.
25:00
It crops up at all, you know, it crops up at all times.
25:02
But it is, I mean, the first point is, you know, looking at ultimately
25:06
when, if we are looking at social media, we are comparing someone
25:08
else's outward social media face.
25:11
We're not seeing, you know, what goes on inside.
25:14
And we can probably all say we are guilty of that.
25:16
We all put out the, the positives not so much the, the true reality.
25:20
So I think there's one part is actually just acknowledging that
25:23
for what it is and what it's not.
25:25
And the other thing as you said is, is looking at, okay, what, what do I have?
25:29
So every day I do as part of, I mentioned journaling, I.
25:33
Do my gratitudes.
25:34
So I wake up I either do it morning or evening depending, you know, bit of,
25:38
you know, flexibility I mentioned there.
25:40
I have to be flexibility as one of my values.
25:43
So I will write what I'm grateful for in the day.
25:46
So, and you know, some days it's digging deep a little bit.
25:49
Some days it might have been a bit of a naff day, to be honest,
25:52
and things have not gone well.
25:53
But I will look at, okay, what.
25:56
What do I have that I am grateful for?
25:59
You know, my, my home and a cozy warm bed and my family around me and, you know,
26:05
and I had a great, I had a, I was a great podcast guest with Becca today, or, you
26:09
know, that, that's a really good one.
26:10
Of course.
26:11
But, you know, sometimes, sometimes it's not always the,
26:14
you know, the exciting ones.
26:15
But that's a really good reminder for me of.
26:19
What am I grateful for?
26:20
And again, linking back into what's, what's my why, why do you know?
26:25
One of my why's a bit like you, Becca, is to be, is to be flexible, to be
26:29
around for, for my family and, you know, to, to, to be available for them.
26:35
And, and that's, you know, and actually I'm able to do that.
26:38
So, Whilst also making a difference to brilliant clients who absolutely love
26:45
working with and feel very privileged that I get such great feedback from
26:50
them and I get to work with brilliant people who are such action takers and.
26:54
Just all around lovely human beings, frankly.
26:57
Becca: Yes, gratitudes I think is so important and we've all got things
27:01
to be thankful for and we just don't spend enough time thinking about them.
27:04
Now, Kelly, I dunno if I'm speaking out of turn here, but I believe
27:08
that we have both got to a position where we are doing something that
27:11
we actually love doing day by day.
27:13
I love what I do.
27:14
I see that you look like you love what you do.
27:17
Again, I'm, it might not all be perfect for all of us all of the time,
27:20
but we found something that we love.
27:22
So what I'd love to know from you, Is, how do you now stay
27:26
in love with your business?
27:27
How do you keep things fresh?
27:28
How do you bring new ideas to the fore and keep yourself going?
27:32
Kelly: Mm-hmm.
27:33
Yeah.
27:33
Excellent.
27:34
Now great, great question.
27:36
And yeah, one that I have definitely got a whole heat better at since
27:41
I, you know, did fall out of love with my wedding planning business.
27:45
And it was a painful time.
27:46
I was absolutely determined not.
27:48
Not to do that again , for it not to be so painful and actually to, to recognize, you
27:54
know, recognize things a bit more quickly.
27:56
How to keep in love with, with what I do, really key thing is
28:01
looking after myself is, is putting myself higher up the agenda.
28:06
So what I mean by that is, You know, it's not necessarily dramatic huge things.
28:12
It's just making sure that I am taking breaks, that I am doing the things that
28:16
are important to me so that I'm not, so I'm going out for a walk every morning.
28:20
That's one of my routines.
28:21
That's one of the things I love being outdoors.
28:23
I do my, you know, we might call it self-care, self-love, all of
28:26
whatever we, whatever, you know, we, we kind of resonate with.
28:30
But I.
28:31
I do a lot more now on giving myself the head space and the time
28:36
to look after myself because I'm the greatest asset in my business,
28:40
and most of your listeners will be.
28:43
Maybe solopreneurs or small teams, and without you, the
28:47
business doesn't function.
28:49
So it took me a really long time to recognize that I
28:52
was worth in investing in.
28:54
And that actually looking after myself is, helps me to, to grow and I mean, For
29:01
me, it also, it's, it's actually being okay with taking time out of the office.
29:07
You know, I get my best ideas when I'm not sat at my desk.
29:09
I get my best ideas when I'm driving, when I'm on a walk, when I'm on
29:14
holiday, when I'm, I'm somewhere else.
29:16
So actually, in terms of.
29:19
Developing and growing and thinking, what am I gonna do next?
29:22
Actually, it's, it's being okay with and, and positively taking steps towards going.
29:26
Yeah.
29:26
Do you know what I am gonna, I'm gonna take, I'm gonna take the
29:29
day off, or I'm gonna take the half day off and I'm gonna go.
29:32
Off on a walk, I'm gonna go, you know, go and have lunch with a friend.
29:37
I now give my myself permission to do that a lot more, and that
29:42
helps me innovate and grow.
29:44
So
29:44
Becca: I have my best ideas on holiday as well, Kelly.
29:46
So I think that gives us permission to go on more holidays because it's
29:50
business and we're coming up with our best ideas when we are away, aren't we?
29:54
Kelly: Hundred percent.
29:55
And as you know, I love my travel and holidays, so, you know.
30:00
Becca: Yeah, yeah.
30:01
And so do I.
30:02
And I think as well for me, what I've found over the years is just
30:05
as I grow, recognizing when I don't enjoy a task and then either.
30:11
Letting go of it or employing someone else to do it or finding a freelancer to take
30:15
away the things that I don't like doing.
30:17
Because I think even though we might not be conscious of it, we know what
30:21
we enjoy doing because they're the things that go first on our to-do list.
30:24
And the things that stay at the bottom of our to-do list for
30:26
weeks and weeks and weeks are the things that we don't like doing.
30:28
My husband says to me all the time, why are you never doing your accounts?
30:32
And I'm like, cuz I don't like doing it.
30:34
But I love.
30:35
Podcasting.
30:35
I love making videos.
30:36
I love being out on venue visits.
30:38
I love talking to people.
30:39
I love networking.
30:41
I don't love doing admin, and I think it's realizing our weaknesses, the things that
30:45
we don't love, and either finding someone to help with them or, you know, finding
30:50
ways to do it to make it more interesting.
30:52
That's the other thing I've been doing, like, oh, I'll treat
30:54
myself if I do my accounts.
30:56
Kelly: Yeah, exactly.
30:57
And sometimes it is sort of having a word with yourself and just doing it, isn't it?
31:02
And that's the case for all of us.
31:04
But sometimes it is thinking, do you know what, actually it's worth me getting
31:09
someone else to help me with this.
31:11
Somebody else.
31:12
Yes, you may need to pay them, you probably will need to pay them.
31:14
But actually it's, again, it's looking at that time factor.
31:18
Is my time better spent doing the things that I'm really good at, naturally
31:21
good at, and I'm passionate about?
31:23
Or is it.
31:24
And is it better to pay someone else?
31:25
And it's always a difficult, it's a difficult equation, but also
31:29
it's accepting that other people can do things better than you.
31:32
And that was a realization for me.
31:35
I sort of held a lot of things close to my chest for a really long, really
31:38
long time thinking, one, I had to do them because I, it was my business.
31:42
I had to do everything, which, You know is, is not true.
31:46
And two, I almost sort of was reluctant to open up and let others in almost for fear
31:51
that, oh, they might do it better than me.
31:53
But the last few years, I absolutely embrace it when people
31:57
do stuff way better than me.
31:58
That's great.
31:59
I love it.
32:01
So, yeah,
32:02
Becca: absolutely.
32:03
Kelly, thank you for sharing.
32:04
I think that's been a really helpful conversation and it's
32:07
helpful to dig deep and get behind, you know, that glossy facade of
32:12
social media where everyone thinks.
32:14
Everyone's got it all together and yeah, I think it's been a
32:16
really helpful conversation.
32:18
So thank you for your time on that.
32:19
Now, before I let you go, it would be remiss of me not to at least talk to you
32:23
a little bit about venues because that is where you're spending all of your time.
32:27
And while I've got your wonderful expertise here, I would love
32:30
just kind of as a top line.
32:32
What do you think's happening out there in the world of venues right now,
32:36
and what can my listeners, as wedding pros or venue owners themselves be
32:40
learning or doing to engage with that?
32:42
Kelly: Mm-hmm.
32:43
Okay.
32:43
Great question.
32:44
So what's going on with venues?
32:46
I, I think everyone is, kind of excited that, that sort of excited that 2022
32:57
is over and done with in a nice way.
32:59
In terms, it was a, it was a manic year.
33:02
It was a brilliant year.
33:03
A little bit of 2023.
33:06
Ah, yes.
33:06
Okay.
33:07
Okay.
33:08
It's gonna be you know, we, we we're on it.
33:11
We know what we're doing.
33:11
We've dealt with so much.
33:13
We're, we're on it, I think is.
33:15
Is one of the, the kind of feelings that I have in terms of what's going on out
33:21
there in terms of maybe different venues.
33:24
I'm seeing lots of focus on outdoors.
33:27
So lots of very much outdoor marquee, teepee, complete farm and land-based.
33:33
Locations really sort of growing in popularity, a new entrance
33:37
to the market coming up.
33:39
So lots of, of, of purely land-based locations seem to
33:43
be very much a growing trend.
33:45
So from that point of view, you know, that's, that's really exciting.
33:49
And I think pandemic certainly sort of pushed that along a little bit as well
33:53
as a lot of farms diversifying, which is.
33:56
Big, big part of, of my client base I think I have lots of conversations with,
34:02
with venue owners about learnings from the last three years and lots of them
34:08
are saying how much they have appreciated so much more the value of collaboration
34:13
and supply net that the supply chain and you know, of course, There were, you
34:19
know, some really, really tough times.
34:21
And I think there is now an appreciation of just how valuable it is when you've
34:25
got good people, when you've got good companies that work with you.
34:29
And I, I, I hope that that translates more into better
34:33
developing working relationships.
34:34
I know in the historically, you know, not all, obviously it's never it's
34:38
always very nuanced, but sometimes venues hadn't necessarily opened up either
34:43
to each other or to developing really.
34:46
You know, good relationships with wedding professionals and certainly
34:50
the venues that I'm privileged to, to work with really va have valued their
34:54
great relationships and really want to put more, more into that, whether it's,
34:58
you know, their wedding professionals or their own team, their own recruits
35:02
and their own in-house team members.
35:04
So, There we go.
35:06
I could talk for hours on, on this side of things, but
35:11
Becca: that is music to my ears.
35:13
Kelly.
35:14
As you know, I am big on collaboration, on connections and on people working
35:18
together, and it's about time the venues caught up with the rest of the industry,
35:23
so I'm thrilled to hear that that is starting to slowly shift and change.
35:27
I'm here for it.
35:27
Kelly: I know I'm very lucky I work with, with.
35:29
You know, I, I would say very progressive venues, which is great.
35:33
I, I've banged that drum constantly and, and I think, yes, whilst the
35:38
pandemic was not good, it certainly has accelerated that for, in my
35:44
experience in terms of recognizing that the, the tree value say, let's hope.
35:50
Becca: That is excellent news.
35:51
Now, Kelly, I always end my interviews with the same question, and that
35:54
is what is one thing you wish you'd known sooner in your own business?
35:59
Kelly: Mm, yeah.
36:00
I think for me it was not necessarily knowing, but it was giving myself
36:05
permission to invest in myself to get some support, whether that was delegating or
36:11
having somebody come into my business.
36:13
You know, when I, I hired my first coach and actually support me and, and
36:17
help me grow and help me develop, and I wish I'd done that sooner, frankly.
36:21
Becca: Yeah, absolutely.
36:23
Kelly, it's been such a pleasure.
36:24
Thank you again for opening up and being so honest and open with everyone.
36:27
If people wanna find out more about you and what you do, where's
36:30
the best place for them to go?
36:31
Kelly: Yes, so either KellyChandlerconsulting.co.uk on the
36:35
web or my Instagram, which is Kelly Chandler Consulting, where there's lots
36:40
of, lots of juicy content over there.
36:43
And you can follow along all the things I'm doing both consulting
36:46
with venues and working with other wedding professionals via coaching.
36:50
So I'd love to to meet some new people over there.
36:53
Becca: Fantastic.
36:54
And I'll make sure to put all of Kelly's links in the show notes.
36:57
Kelly, it's been a pleasure.
36:58
I hope we can get together or speak at an event somewhere together very soon.
37:02
Yeah.
37:02
Kelly: Brilliant.
37:03
Thank you so much.
37:03
I've had lots of fun.
37:04
Thanks.