Latest / Overwhelmed Working Woman: Boost Productivity, Master Time Management, Overcome Overwhelm & Stop People Pleasing / #188| Why Your Calendar Is Lying to You About Your Time (and What to Do About It)
Transcript
- 0:00MichelleGauthier: What's on your calendar doesn't necessarily reflect the reality.
- 0:09MichelleGauthier: You're listening to Overwhelmed Working Woman, the podcast that helps you be more calm and more productive by doing less.
- 0:16MichelleGauthier: I'm your host, Michelle Gauthier, a former Overwhelmed Working Woman and current life coach.
- 0:21MichelleGauthier: On this show, we unpack the stress and pressure that today's Working Woman experiences.
- 0:26MichelleGauthier: And in each episode, you'll get a strategy to bring more calm, ease, and relaxation to your life.
- 0:36MichelleGauthier: Hi friends, today I'm here with a reminder that you may have heard before from me, or maybe you haven't.
- 0:42MichelleGauthier: But I want to remind you today in this episode, because I just had something happen to me this week that drove it home for sure.
- 0:49MichelleGauthier: Sometimes what something looks like on your calendar and the amount of time and space it actually takes up, either physically or mentally, do not match up.
- 0:57MichelleGauthier: When you listen today, you're going to learn that what is on your calendar isn't necessarily realistically reflecting the amount of time and energy that it's going to take and how those hidden costs, like the hidden time that doesn't show up on the calendar, adds up over time and why that can make us feel overwhelmed, even when we're thinking, why am I so overwhelmed?
- 1:22MichelleGauthier: It was just a one-hour appointment.
- 1:24MichelleGauthier: Before I jump into that, I want to say thanks to the people who have recently left new ratings and reviews for the podcast.
- 1:32MichelleGauthier: One of them said Michelle is the antidote to overwhelm.
- 1:35MichelleGauthier: She is calm, clear, and encouraging.
- 1:37MichelleGauthier: And I love this podcast.
- 1:39MichelleGauthier: So thank you so much, Shanna, for that shout out.
- 1:42MichelleGauthier: And if you are a listener who has not yet given a rating or review, it would be wonderful if you could take a few minutes to do that.
- 1:50MichelleGauthier: I would so appreciate it.
- 1:51MichelleGauthier: Really helps the podcast get shown in so many more places.
- 1:56MichelleGauthier: Okay, let's get to it here.
- 1:58MichelleGauthier: So here's what happened in my life this week.
- 2:00MichelleGauthier: Number one, my 14-year-old daughter got her braces off.
- 2:03MichelleGauthier: Yay! So exciting after all this time.
- 2:07MichelleGauthier: And it really got me thinking - she had a one-hour appointment on Monday morning to get her braces off.
- 2:12MichelleGauthier: So what showed on my calendar was like Josie getting her braces off at, you know, 8 a.m.
- 2:18MichelleGauthier: on Monday morning.
- 2:19MichelleGauthier: But what it actually took, the appointment was exactly an hour.
- 2:23MichelleGauthier: That was correct.
- 2:24MichelleGauthier: But I didn't factor in the time it was going to take us to get there, the time it was going to take to get home, the call that I had to make to the dentist after the appointment to schedule something for follow-up, the call that I had to make to school to let them know that she was going to be late, the groceries that I ordered because her mouth was kind of sore and hurting and she wanted chicken noodle soup for dinner.
- 2:44MichelleGauthier: So I made chicken noodle soup for dinner.
- 2:46MichelleGauthier: So this one hour appointment really was more like two hours, maybe even more than that, in my mind and in my physical time that I spent doing things.
- 2:57MichelleGauthier: And it really made me think about no, honestly, getting braces and having straight teeth is such a first world problem and something that people of privilege are able to do.
- 3:09MichelleGauthier: So I am not overlooking the fact that I'm grateful that we have to do this.
- 3:15MichelleGauthier: But when I started thinking about how much time, and the reason why I was thinking about this is because every time I walk into orthdontist, I'm like, ugh, I hate it here.
- 3:22MichelleGauthier: I can't stand this place.
- 3:23MichelleGauthier: And I've really tried to change my mindset around it, and it just always comes back to that.
- 3:27MichelleGauthier: So I was kind of trying to dig into it.
- 3:29MichelleGauthier: And I thought it's because it's such a time suck.
- 3:32MichelleGauthier: There are so many appointments that have to happen to go from like, do you need braces to okay, you had them and now everything's fixed.
- 3:40MichelleGauthier: So I actually called the orthodontist as I was starting to write this podcast and asked, hey, how many appointments has my daughter had?
- 3:47MichelleGauthier: And how many appointments did my son have?
- 3:50MichelleGauthier: And what I found out is that she had 54 appointments over the course of many years, and he had 59 appointments.
- 3:57MichelleGauthier: Each appointment looked like a simple one-hour block on my calendar, but when I added it up, the driving, the waiting, the follow-up, each visit was realistically more like 90 minutes.
- 4:08MichelleGauthier: So if you do the math, I'll do it for you so you don't have to do it in your head.
- 4:11MichelleGauthier: 54 visits times 90 minutes plus 59 visits for 90 minutes is 169.5 hours total.
- 4:19MichelleGauthier: That is the equivalent of over four full-time work weeks.
- 4:24MichelleGauthier: So over the course of the past few years, I have spent an entire month of work weeks at the Orthodonist or calling the Orthodonist or thinking about the orthodontist.
- 4:34MichelleGauthier: But if you would have peeked at my calendar maybe like once a month, you would have seen an appointment on there for an hour.
- 4:40MichelleGauthier: So I just, as I saw this, first of all, I patted myself on the back big time.
- 4:44MichelleGauthier: Look at me.
- 4:45MichelleGauthier: There were almost none of those appointments.
- 4:48MichelleGauthier: I think my parents might have taken one of them one time when I was desperate for it.
- 4:52MichelleGauthier: And my son was able to drive himself at the very end of his.
- 4:55MichelleGauthier: But other than that, it was for sure me doing each and every one of those appointments.
- 5:00MichelleGauthier: So I did definitely pat myself on the back.
- 5:02MichelleGauthier: And then I started thinking about this, and we've talked about this on the podcast before that what's on your calendar doesn't necessarily reflect the reality.
- 5:11MichelleGauthier: And our calendar can sometimes give the illusion of simplicity, like that one hour spot.
- 5:18MichelleGauthier: But the story is usually bigger.
- 5:21MichelleGauthier: Prep and logistics and emotional energy and recovery, et cetera.
- 5:26MichelleGauthier: I'm sharing this with you today so that you can think about it.
- 5:28MichelleGauthier: And we had a guest on a while ago who talked about as women, we need to have space in our calendars for these kinds of things that come up.
- 5:38MichelleGauthier: So yes, you mark the one hour on there, but you also need an extra half hour on each side.
- 5:43MichelleGauthier: So if you look at your calendar and you think about, okay, this looks like it's going to be a one-hour meeting, but after that meeting, I'm going to need 30 minutes to download.
- 5:52MichelleGauthier: Can you block that on your calendar?
- 5:54MichelleGauthier: Can you make your calendar reflect reality?
- 5:58MichelleGauthier: That's a challenge that I give you for this week.
- 6:01MichelleGauthier: The other thing to think about is that the hidden costs of this add up kind of everywhere.
- 6:07MichelleGauthier: It isn't if you're a person who doesn't have kids and you're not taking anyone to the Orthodontist, think about hosting a dinner party.
- 6:14MichelleGauthier: And on your calendar it says like friends for dinner at six.
- 6:17MichelleGauthier: But in reality, especially at least when it's me, I'm planning the menu, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, hosting, cleaning up after so that three-hour event is really more like over the course of a week, you know, five or six hours.
- 6:34MichelleGauthier: It's five or six hours that I really enjoy spending.
- 6:37MichelleGauthier: And when I have my girlfriends over for dinner, I absolutely love it.
- 6:41MichelleGauthier: But it needs to be reflected in my calendar when I'm spending that time so that I realize how much time and effort I'm putting into things.
- 6:49MichelleGauthier: Because otherwise, for example, if I really did have all my friends over for dinner, it would indeed just be on Friday night.
- 6:56MichelleGauthier: But it's good for me to be able to see it if I were to go back and reflect reality to say, okay, on Tuesday night I'm going to spend an hour planning the menu.
- 7:04MichelleGauthier: On Wednesday, I'm going to order the food.
- 7:06MichelleGauthier: On Thursday, I'm going to prep some things.
- 7:08MichelleGauthier: On Friday, I'm going to set the table around lunchtime, et cetera.
- 7:11MichelleGauthier: You know, all the different things that you have to do.
- 7:14MichelleGauthier: It's the same with travel, doctor's appointments, even quick errands, those hidden time sucks just sort of sneak in everywhere.
- 7:23MichelleGauthier: And the last thing I want to remind you of is that you're not, sometimes people will say, I don't know why I'm overwhelmed.
- 7:29MichelleGauthier: I don't feel like I have that much on my calendar.
- 7:32MichelleGauthier: So if you just looked at my month worth of orthodontia over time, I might have said, I don't know why this is so overwhelming to me.
- 7:40MichelleGauthier: I don't know why I feel like I'm doing so much.
- 7:42MichelleGauthier: That's why.
- 7:43MichelleGauthier: Because it's taking way more time, mental and physical time, than it looks like it's going to.
- 7:50MichelleGauthier: So what I challenge you to do this week is just to right now, unless you're driving, then do it when you stop.
- 7:56MichelleGauthier: But right now, take a look at your calendar for the week and see if it is reflecting reality or if you should add some buffer time on either side of it, or if you should just add like some time on your calendar to make phone calls, like I had to call the dentist and I had to do things like that.
- 8:13MichelleGauthier: Should you build that into your calendar?
- 8:15MichelleGauthier: And that way your calendar more accurately reflects how much time you really have.
- 8:20MichelleGauthier: So, for example, if we think about my example of having people over for dinner on Friday night, and if I went to my calendar and I put on an hour each night to work on different things, and somebody said, Hey, do you want to go to dinner on Tuesday?
- 8:32MichelleGauthier: I look at my calendar and be like, Oh, I actually don't because I'm doing like a lot of prep every night this week.
- 8:38MichelleGauthier: So I really don't want to go to dinner.
- 8:40MichelleGauthier: It just helps you make better decisions when you can see on your calendar what is realistic, how much time things are really going to take you.
- 8:49MichelleGauthier: That's it for this week, friends.
- 8:50MichelleGauthier: As always, if you're feeling overwhelmed and you don't know why, you can click on the link in the show notes to take the overwhelm quiz.
- 8:58MichelleGauthier: It will give you specifics about why you're feeling overwhelmed and even give you free tools to help you solve that problem.
- 9:04MichelleGauthier: Have a great week.
- 9:10MichelleGauthier: Thank you for listening to the Overwhelmed Working Woman podcast.
- 9:13MichelleGauthier: If you want to learn more about my work, head over to my website at MichelleGauthier.com.
- 9:19MichelleGauthier: See you next week.