Latest / Success Story with Scott Clary / Lessons - How to Build Marriage and Money Together | Elena Cardone - Cardone Mortgage Co-Founder

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Lessons - How to Build Marriage and Money Together | Elena Cardone - Cardone Mortgage Co-Founder · Success Story with Scott Clary

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  In this lessons episode, explore how high performance and strong partnerships drive lasting,
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  personal, and professional success. Discover strategies to build trust and clarity in relationships,
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  understand how women can overcome imposter syndrome and access key resources and uncover ways to
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  leverage personal power to grow influence, elevate families, and scale impact.
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  You know, one thing that I've actually always thought is you and Grant are probably the best
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  example I can think of of high performing individuals that make a relationship in a family unit
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  really work well. And there's of course tons of tons of people to do this, but I also see the flip
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  side a lot of people that are high performing individuals and have been divorced and cheating
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  and stress and broken homes. What do you think the difference is it's that allocating the resources
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  to what you're good at building an empire together? Is that what made you work out this why so many
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  people don't work out because I was going to ask I was going to ask a question you saw the question
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  I was going to ask before it was you know, do you think it's easier to build a business with or
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  without a partner and some people will say without because they don't have to be accountable to somebody
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  they don't have to worry about anyone but themselves, but I don't agree with that. Why did it work so
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  well for you? Because we really figured out our roles in the relationship we had the purpose big
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  enough. We also we we keep it really clean with each other not that we haven't not been perfect
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  over a 19 year marriage and 20 years together, but we have the courage to talk about every single
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  little transgression that we have ever done against each other and we we work through it and
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  you know sometimes you're angry at first, but then you figure out okay well where can I take
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  responsibility for what led you to do that or what problem were you trying to solve? And
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  and then it makes us more fortified and more trusting of each other and
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  and and and a lot of couples do little things to each other you know like date like they throw the
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  penny yeah the penny but over time like the pennies you you've been hit by a million pennies
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  something's gonna break or get hurt in your body right so people do a lot of long-term little
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  things of oh I'm gonna stay out or I'm gonna flirt or I'm gonna do this oh it doesn't matter so
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  and so does it it's oh have fun you know oh I'm gonna drink I'm gonna flirt oh I get my will
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  but then you go home and then not sitting with you and then you don't want him to know about it or
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  hurt and know about it because you're like oh I can't so then it creates more distance because
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  now you're hiding different things from each other do you know what I'm saying you become
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  individuated and isolated and the more bad things that you do to a person the more you withdraw
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  from them but here's the worst part the more in order to justify that you've been doing the bad
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  things to that person now you're gonna pull in different critical aspects of that person to justify
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  why you did the bad thing to them so now I go out I flirted you know I had too much to drink I'm
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  with my girls I'm like oh yeah you know I'm about to turn 50 or 40 or whatever the number
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  he still thinks I'm hot woo and I'm you know and but that's not cool like I wouldn't want
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  to grant doing that behind my back but let's say I do that right and now I'm like oh I had too
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  much to drink I feel bad about that because I woke up late I didn't I was I had a headache I was
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  bitchy to my daughter you know if there's a whole compounding little effect of these little tiny
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  things that's just life or whatever but now I've done that like let's say to my daughter to my
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  husband you know my own self integrity let's say I already had a commitment I don't drink and then
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  I did so now I'm like affecting myself I'm affecting my husband I'm affecting my daughter from
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  that one little thing that it is and now I'm keeping it a secret from everyone now what do I have to
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  do in order to justify that I did this horrible thing to all these people involved now I have to go
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  back and say well you know what he doesn't pay me attention he's a jackass he tells he's always
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  trying to tell me what to do he didn't compliment me he walked ahead of me on date night you know
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  instead of walking with me all the other guys walk with their partners but not grand not grand he's
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  like you know oh he's misogynistic like well he asked me to make him something to eat like I'm like
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  what am I like a my time's not valuable you understand so I have to start in all these negative
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  things about these people to justify that and the thing that's made us successful is from time to time
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  we just lay it all out on the line for each other in a in a space where we can work through it
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  and then there's nothing there like there is nothing that you can find on me that grant does not
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  already know so I get to walk in the light I'm not worried I'm not afraid I have no reason to
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  separate from him I have no reason to individuate from him because I'm clean I love that I want to
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  talk about I want to talk about the concept of having it all who's that message for and what does
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  that message mean that message means it's a mindset it's like lack of scarcity you can have it all
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  you we I don't think we were conditioned I don't think we were conditioned to think that I think
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  we were conditioned to say wins enough enough and you know you're greedy if you want it all and
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  you know what's wrong with you et cetera et cetera et cetera at least that's that's I can only
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  speak about myself that's how I feel I was raised you know like you're here and they're there
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  and that life is there and you you know because you're here you can't have that those are for those
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  people and that's not well I think you can have it all the women you work with though the women
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  you work with do you feel like that imposter syndrome like plagues them more than men
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  imposter syndrome like like like when you work with like all the women in the 10x ladies do you feel
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  that getting them started getting them feeling they can build something maybe because they
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  haven't really that's not something they've ever been exposed to is that's something that
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  you know the content of having it all it helps them understand what they're able to do
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  yeah I really do and and you know yeah the imposter syndrome that's a that's a whole
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  another topic but oh yeah yeah fair you know and and there's also you can have it all
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  but what are you willing to give up in order to get where you want to go yeah do you know what I'm
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  saying because yeah you might want to have it all but if you don't already have it all
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  what what do you what do you or if I want to go sit in the chair across the room I literally have
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  to give up something I have to give up the comfort of this chair and actually do an action which
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  is walking over and sitting in a new seat so a lot of people want it all think they're entitled to
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  it all think they can't have it all but the reality is is you can have it all what are you willing to
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  give up toxic people a comfortable chair like you know are you willing to give up your mentality
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  that you can't work with your partner like there was a lot of things I had to get rid of in order
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  to have it all but you can have it I think what I was what I was alluding to is is and this is not
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  across the board this is a huge generalization but but stay with me on this one um of course
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  there's incredible women female entrepreneurs but for example if you're a woman you want to have a
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  family and you want to raise a successful family maybe you have stuck in your head that that's
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  going to be hard to do while you build a business or maybe you have it stuck in your head that's
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  going to be hard to do while you rise through the ranks in the company and that's really what I was
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  alluding to like you can have you you're you're literally doing it and that's to think the message
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  is very important too for women that haven't taken that jump or that leap and I'm assuming that's
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  part of what you're teaching over and in your actual in your content in the in the conference you're
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  having as well million percent sometimes the thought of oh if I have kids or get married it's
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  going to be a setback but actually if you get with the right partner uh and they're pushing you
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  toward a heightened level of success you can reach it faster and yeah it's not going to be easy
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  you know probably for anyone doing anything because we live on planet earth so the woman that
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  thinks oh I can't do that and have kids you just have to let go of the idea that anything's really
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  going to be easy or doesn't have to be figured out like it has to be figured out nothing's going
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  to be easy which side of that do you want to be on easy with a family that actually you know inspires
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  you and motivates you and expands who you are and who you had to become in order to get there
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  or not yeah yeah I love that um so let's let's talk about what you're doing with with
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  10x ladies and the reason I want to go into this in a in a bigger ways because you're so focused on
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  it now and I I believe there's not a lot of resources that are marketed towards teaching women
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  about finance about entrepreneurship um I mean there we can talk about everything with
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  glass ceiling gender pay gaps all this different thing I mean I know my backgrounds and startups
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  women are massively underfunded compared to men there's a whole bunch of issues but
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  what are you specifically teaching over to women how are you helping them what are the problems
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  that you're seeing they have when they're starting a business trying to take it to the next level
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  it's sort of you know without without being without being silly like 10xing themselves right
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  right um the problems that they're having are probably a little bit what you're talking about the
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  kind of the the the lack of know-how or confidence or um feeling that they have to be something
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  already in order to be able to do something uh for the you know the confidence or the know-how
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  or the resources but over at 10x ladies um what I'm trying to do is provide a platform in a
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  community where like-minded women can get together and support each other and really hold them
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  accountable and be the woman behind the group behind the vases women supporting showing active
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  interests in the success of them now if you want to be a woman in business you are going to have
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  to take certain steps you're going to have to understand with the target is what do I have to learn
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  what do I have to learn about this in my business or money or finances or how do how do how do you
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  make sales you know if you make sales in your entrepreneurial business and you can show
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  this is what we've done and you go to an investor and they're they don't care whether you're a
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  a male or a female you you've got to produce the stats you've got to show the return of investment
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  and then they want to do business with you so at 10x ladies we we really curate that community
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  and then start with providing the right information so that people can function there's there's
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  the concept of being the four pillars of being a 10x woman there's the being 10x in mindset
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  10x in money your relationships and your health and wellness like how to design your life
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  so and the concept is you can't be 10x in health and have your money failing and you can't be 10x
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  in money and your relationships are failing and I know and look beyond just the relationship with
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  your partner I mean relationships if you want to build an empire no empire has been built alone
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  whether you're in bed with someone or not you need relationships to expand to grow to to
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  delegate out you forced to grow an empire doesn't happen with one person never has in the
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  history of the world so far so it's how to educate and power women on these areas so that they
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  can actually own their power and the power means the capacity or the ability to influence the
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  behavior of others it doesn't say you have to be a CEO a millionaire billionaire it says you
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  have to have the capacity or the ability to influence the behavior of others so what does that mean
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  how do I become empowered myself how do I live up to my full potential how do I educate myself on
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  my little entrepreneurial business so that then when I go and pitch it to somebody and investor
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  I can have the power to influence your decision to want to invest with me that's power it goes to
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  that big level to something small if I smile to someone on the street and I'm like this and they
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  smile back and I influenced them that's a smile it's about really owning your powers a woman
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  growing it to the point where then you can then bring it home to your families expand out to the
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  families influence the families to reach a heightened level of success then beyond that your
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  communities to your group and how well can your group do around you and then if you want to go
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  even bigger than that and you've grown then you go okay how do I go global how do I go to all
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  of mankind so that's what 10x ladies is is really about empowering women to take responsibility for
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  their role for their power for making a difference for the better for to helping to change the
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  trajectory of this planet to make a difference for the better thanks for tuning in if you found
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  this valuable don't forget to hit that subscribe button so you never miss an episode and if you
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  want to dive deeper into this conversation check out the links in the description to watch the
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  full episode see you in the next one