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Rabbi Moshe Haber Path of the Just- Pure Intentions and Public Deeds 8.6.25 · Rabbi Moshe Haber - Daily Mussar/Weekly Perasha

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  The concert that we started yesterday of doing things with
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  purity, I mean with purity means you're doing them without.
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  I will say, so much ulterior motive.
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  You're doing good things for the right reasons.
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  Thank you. That's what it is inside Vomnam
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  Sedicia Teda Shikamor. You read these words yesterday.
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  Person needs to know the same way.
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  This is the thing as having the right intention, have the right
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  mindset, being pure in a lot of physical things we do right as
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  we tend, he says. Ken Shaya, you're doing a really
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  good thing, you're learning to, you're giving charity, you're
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  helping out someone who's struggling.
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  Good things. They too require a good macheva.
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  Good things that need to be coming from a good place.
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  You can't do good things coming from a knocker place.
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  And that sounds like a strange statement.
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  Who does good things for a knocker place?
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  Sadly, it's relatively common now.
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  People can do good things with funny intentions.
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  People can say, you know how many people, how many millions
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  of people have said funny things to other people officially meant
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  to encourage and really hurtful so many times.
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  That's also a concept of doing a good thing with the bad mindset.
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  And in this example, we'll see clearly who and Yan Shiloh
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  ishma. This is the concept that we have
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  that's pretty broad called Shiloh Ishma doing something.
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  We aren't attention. I'm Muscard without the right
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  attention. A commonly mentioned phrase
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  vulam. I mean, we know from the rabbis
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  Shesh Minim Shonim Shilodishma, there are many different levels
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  of doing something Shilodishma without the full good intention.
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  Many different levels. It's not obey.
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  Let's see the worst harami Kulam again to make this topic
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  relevant and clear to our minds or talking about someone who's
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  ready at the level and he's doing something good.
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  You're getting involved in helping another family.
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  Make sure when you do so, don't do it with the wrong motors.
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  You're getting involved in studying Torah eventually,
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  keyword eventually, make sure when you're doing so, you're
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  doing it for the right reason. You're giving charity, same
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  idea. You're giving a personal advice.
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  You're helping somewhere along. You're even running your own
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  family. You're running your marriage,
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  whatever it is, have in the back of your head the right overall
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  goals and why you're doing so. Don't do it.
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  Shilal Ishma Let's see the worst kind and we'll develop it.
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  Harami kulam. The worst of them is Shannon or
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  Vela Shame Abu Dhaka person serves Hashem, but not it does a
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  good thing, but not at all for that purpose.
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  Ella little amot Binaya down to trick other people and to make
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  money. This is a really not a good
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  person, but this is definitely exists.
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  Someone does a good thing or he's evolved in a good practice,
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  but he's doing it to make money. Good guy, bad guys.
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  Yeah, guys, I don't know. He's running an organization and
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  he's taking to the side a lot of money.
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  He's a vision just now, right? And he's a vision running into
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  the organization and he's making money on the side.
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  Bad guy, He's using Hashem's name, and he's using Hashem's
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  system for himself. Bad thing.
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  Mazel OSHA rubo Noah lauche nephewsliata panab.
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  Such a person would have been better for him.
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  These are words had he not been born alive.
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  This person is utilizing good for bad.
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  He's the worst. He's not only not a Krisha
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  shame, he's the opposite of Krisha shame and he's taking all
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  what Shem gave and the purpose of why we're here and he's
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  turning on his head. What about if a person intended
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  to do good, but he wasn't filled out well enough and it didn't
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  end up? But for instance, when Guy took
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  money and he says, you know what, I'm going to put it in the
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  stock market because we're going to be able to make the shoe
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  three times the amount of money. Yeah, and.
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  It doesn't work out. It's not this level at all.
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  It's gambling. It's not, it's not maybe not so
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  small, it's not this level, it's not the next level which is
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  better. It's not even it's, it's pretty
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  much a mistake. And that's something else which
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  is a question mark because you have to be careful or deal with
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  community money. You have to be thought out.
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  You have to ask other people advice.
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  All those are correct, but they do not do not know and involve
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  evil. All these have layers at least
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  some degree of bad involved. This guy we're talking about
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  right here in front of us, his intent is bad.
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  His intent is bad. He's actually just right for
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  this guy for intensive purposes. He has nothing to do with what
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  I'm it's what in this regard. He's utilizing the system to
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  make money that's out and that's someone who you'll see he
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  doesn't have any Seattle. This Maya overall in his life
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  from his holy work is not holy work.
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  He doesn't really get any better help from his holy work because
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  not holy work he might be and this is an important point.
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  People often say what do you mean in the process there were
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  families that got help from his work.
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  You know he did involve himself in good as that is is Hashem got
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  those families help maybe through that work, but he's got
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  nothing to do with this person doesn't really get any credit
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  but what he did. He realizes system for his own
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  financial gain or totally. Other people benefited.
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  That yes, people mistakenly believe it's a big mistake.
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  People mistakenly believe if the if the some level of the sum,
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  some degree of the sum was it was good it came out of it.
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  That means it must be he's a good person or it must be
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  biggest mistake out there. Hashem is with him.
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  Incorrect. Hashem is not with him because
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  there were families that got helped along the way as I'm used
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  him. One of the biggest mistakes out
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  there is is the interesting concept and look in the broad
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  stroke, not even involving bad people and that is Barack Hashem
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  in the world today is so much blessing out there and so much
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  good that's happening and so much throughout learning so much
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  has said so much help. Such great things happen and
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  people believe that because there's so much help and there
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  are messengers who deliver that help, that means the messengers
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  are on the level of their result, a play.
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  What I mean, 50 years ago, a rabbi or a leader of an
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  organization, he helped 10 families, 20 families, That's
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  it. Today, the average rabbi that,
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  you know, his name is involved in many, many families lives.
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  Does that make a leader of organization?
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  Does that make those leaders organization today?
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  Greater than the ones of old? No, no, the fact that Hashem
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  made them a Shaliak of more doesn't make them great AT20A
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  tenfold today those. But now you'd say the 100 of
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  today will be a thousandfold. Use that logic.
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  You might go further. Don't mistake, don't.
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  A person has to always realize just because Hashem made them a
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  Shaliak, it doesn't. Don't misunderstand the process.
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  He's still just a messenger. And because he's a messenger, if
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  he internalizes himself to think he's actually the one who
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  enabled it, who created it, who's behind it, that's a big
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  mistake. That's where the ego comes in.
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  When a person realizes I am simply blessed to be a Shaliak
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  and Hashem wants the result. He used me, but the goal?
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  As a result, he keeps himself humble and he avoids being
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  involved in cavort. This guy in front of us on this
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  page is someone who totally did it for the sake of cavort or
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  money. And he's a 0 when it comes to
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  Berhar. He's a 0 when it comes to Cadiz.
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  He didn't do anything. But is the ego such a bad thing
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  in general? Like sometimes it gives you
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  that. Push No, it's not a bad thing.
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  The reality is true. We'll see.
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  The reality is the real blend of a good community servant or the
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  real blend of a good father or a good husband requires some
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  personal motive. It's impossible to expect the
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  person to do things without some motive.
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  Whether you're running your family, you need to have a
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  personal motive that you want. Yes, some honor, some cover with
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  some nachat. Nahad is also cavort, right?
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  Some degree. Nahad is also a personal
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  pleasure, right? And it's the greatest gift a
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  person can have. So you need that drive in every,
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  you know, every fashion. A rabbi also does want to keep
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  his position and he wants to build his position 'cause I'm
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  making a bad person. No.
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  Is he, you know, a, a cavort hungry person?
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  If he's trying to build his institution, no, but he does
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  need to find the right blend, and a very careful, delicate
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  blend is required. Whenever you're pushing ahead
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  for good things, you need to find red and you need to ask.
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  You need to look at the people who came before you and try to
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  find the exact perfect mix of how I'm going to build whatever
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  I'm building, my family, my marriage, my institution, my
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  Cajal, my students, but at the same time, overall drive.
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  You need to require that I'm thinking about them, not myself.
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  If I'm too busy with myself, I'll give you a classic example.
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  It's a difficult example. When someone leaves an
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  institution, right? Someone leaves a school, right?
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  It's a very big hit for the people around that school.
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  And imagine they invested their time in that person.
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  They put a lot into it. I'd better be here.
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  Now, I'm not saying that the person who runs the institution
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  shouldn't say something. He can and he probably should at
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  times. If he believes in an
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  institution, he should make a comment.
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  Like, I think we did something over here.
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  We worked on something and it's not best for you to leave.
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  Well, that's true. But if he gets very upset, also
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  normal, normal. Many people have gotten very
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  upset when they invested in a family for years and the family
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  just left the school. It took six kids out or 4 kids
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  out, and it's very hurtful and it's very upsetting, but you had
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  to find the reaction over there. If it goes too far, it might be
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  because of other things like they feel bad when they lose
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  money, you lose things. It's a very normal reaction.
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  But this is where this blend comes in.
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  You have to figure out the exact blend to the scenario.
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  Let's see forward miesh mean akhe, the second degree of shlo
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  leshima. The first one's a bad guy, The
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  second one is more practical. Shlo leshima shuwa vuda amuna
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  look about. Plus a person trying to get some
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  accolades right. He wants to get some degree of
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  notoriety, reward, reward. This is something that tells us,
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  like you said, a person to study.
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  It's a pathway totally doing it for the right reason.
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  He's doing it for accolades. That's a pathway to him for very
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  reason. But.
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  Who is in the? Kids man towards in the kids
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  man. I'll give you more, even more
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  mature examples of that. It's true, but it does have it's
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  true. It's allowed and it's true.
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  It's a good thing, but eventually need to translate
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  into if he never reaches the finish line, he's still very far
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  from the goal. He's doing anything wrong.
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  No. Do we recommend him continue?
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  Continue, but he's still not there.
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  And I'll give you an example, a classic example.
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  I noticed that when you see a boy learn, Ben has the money.
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  OK, classic example. They learn Ben has the money.
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  They're all of time. Sometimes they like to learn in
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  private, sometimes they like to learn in public.
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  Different things. Some people like people, some
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  people like privacy, and sometimes they like being seen.
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  And there's a reality which means you like the feeling and
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  the encouragement of others noticing.
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  You learn when you don't have to learn.
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  It's just the way it is. I was that way when I was a kid,
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  very much that way. And I like the, I know we call
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  respect, the pat on the back, the mental pat in the back that
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  you get and natural encouragement that comes to you
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  because others are seeing you do a good thing.
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  And it makes you feel cool off time, off time because you're
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  doing a good thing. You don't need to do it.
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  And you know you can do other things and you get, is that a
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  bad thing? No, but eventually you want to
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  get to a point that you can learn in a room alone.
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  That's the goal. But you want to get to a point
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  you don't care what other people think or you don't care about
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  the accolades. You're not busy with looking
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  over your shoulder to see if they're noticing you're here or
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  they're watching when you came, when you left.
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  That's all natural developments. And by the way they happen,
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  Mitosu Ishma Badushma is reality.
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  When someone gets involved in something, not for the wrong
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  reason, like guy #1 but you know, he likes the feeling of
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  other people being impressed by him.
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  It's normal. Any person who gets involved in
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  the in the board of a shul and who enjoys the feeling, a lot of
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  people are coming to him and ask some questions.
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  There's a good feeling there. Any person who gets involved in,
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  in, in, in any institution. Let's be real.
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  You can't tell me that everyone's Saint can't tell me
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  people are getting involved in these things solely for the good
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  of the community or the good of the institutions.
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  It's very difficult to be that way because it won't stick.
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  You'll be so turned off eventually from the headaches.
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  It's not possible. It's very hard.
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  Moshe Albano, and he was dealing you a sure I've been noon.
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  A sure I've been noon. Taking off, taking over the
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  number one job in Jewish history, leader of the Jewish
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  people, general man leading them into Israel, The whole bit going
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  thrash. You need to be convinced.
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  I'm a sure man to take the job. I wasn't like, thank you very
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  much. I'm thrilled.
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  I'm so excited he had to be convinced, which means you do
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  need to have is a very real, real reality.
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  And that is if you getting involved in these things,
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  there's so much agita, so much frustrations, so you do need to
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  motivate to. Be the rabbit of the Shoal.
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  You had to be 'cause I cannot see the rabbit, you shouldn't
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  get it. Cool.
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  Reality is my father told me to be Rabbi told these many times.
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  I told him that he got the wrong son.
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  I said as many times, right and that type and he can have like
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  this is all. A lot of things happened
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  naturally. There was never really a point
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  in time if I was in, you know, gear of it was more like an
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  actual development. But originally when they told me
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  it's a great job, I said that's not for me.
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  He said. I said I want to learn.
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  He said, you're being silly. I think there's a word you're
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  being silly. You want to learn The best job
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  to have as a rabbi for sure, because all you got to do, at
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  least this is his version, all you got to do is give class in
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  the morning, have class at night, sit with some people,
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  take care of Shabbat and you go down all day.
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  It's not as simple as I thought. Made it and it all right.
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  He didn't tell me about the whole, you know, financial stuff
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  or you know, all the different things that go on.
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  But the reality is for him, if I could simplify things so he was
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  able to do that. But the reality is true.
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  But again, do do you want to know my motive to become a
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  rabbi? I was all Ishma I I just want to
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  be a servant of the people. Come on.
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  I can't say that no one could say that.
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  Of course, as a part of it, I wanted to do good, but no one
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  could state that it's all I want to be deserving of.
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  The people is sketching themselves and what happens?
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  They get burnt out. Look at the volunteer rates from
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  these different things. People get excited because they
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  see something, they see something inspiring.
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  Then there's so much headache and it's so much time and so
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  much sacrifice and they don't feel like they get anything out
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  of it. So you do need to come from a
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  very real place, which is you give people a degree of covert
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  and they come in for that purpose.
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  Partially, at least partially. Ultimately, however, it's not to
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  enjoy the feeling of doing good, of helping others, of being
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  there for people. And I always thought this to
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  myself personally, this is one of my own requirements was never
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  let any person swarm my rules personally.
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  Never let any person know everything that you do, which
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  means you're doing things, you're teaching here and you're
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  teaching there or you're giving ahead.
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  You're involved in Biko Holim and you're involved in another
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  organization. Don't have a portfolio in your
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  mind or to anybody knows everything.
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  Everyone knows everything you do because then you're trying to
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  feed that world, trying to feed that animal.
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  If you have an element where they know this, but they don't
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  know that, right? And the other side knows this
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  and they don't know that. So it's a part of you.
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  And when you're dealing with these people, they're not seeing
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  the full you and you're fine with that, right?
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  So for years I tried this. My personal thing was when I
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  went to yeshiva, I didn't tell anyone in yeshiva my role has
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  actually asked place they have no idea what a Syrian shoe looks
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  like. So they didn't, they didn't have
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  to know my role. Only when the schedule got more
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  difficult and I started to show up a little later, it started to
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  become known. But then I tried to keep it
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  hidden because I tried in my own brain.
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  This seemed like a wacky idea, but it was something for me to
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  get myself to think, OK, and yeshiva, they don't need to know
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  Shiva pot and the shul doesn't really need to know the Shiva
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  pot. So I can, you know, push myself
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  in both angles and don't need to build this massive in your mind
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  portfolio and then you try to feed this animal of cavores and
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  all these other things or as if you're a little bit try to keep
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  something hidden. You know, people will give
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  charity. Do they need to do my Tamaseta?
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  They don't. Should they have families that
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  they're providing for on the side that no one knows about?
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  They should because when you do that and you start to have a
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  certain element of the Shima, no one knows, don't recognize
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  you're just doing. It the light is nicer when
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  people find out. What now when they when you
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  bother, I didn't know you don't only what we should know.
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  And I really feel this who the only people that should know
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  really are your kids. The idea of kids not knowing
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  what their parents do. And then you find the kids are
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  cheap or they're stingy and their father gave so much
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  charity. It's a shame.
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  And they would have given, they would give him the same thing.
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  And they knew what their father does because they would see it
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  as their father's. You lead by example.
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  You have to or you have to do that.
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  You have to publicize but at the same time keep an element in the
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  schmag going like. It's like a slippery sword
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  because, and I remember after I finished learning the halachotos
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  to that guy according to what we do in the community made no
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  sense today. Why?
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  Publicity and everything? Yeah, right, right, right.
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  Because you encourage other people to you so that that's
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  what I was told by that's what I was told by you.
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  Do it for your kids. Do it for your kids, you.
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  And then then you need to catch yourself because you find
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  yourself so far away from the Matamba said that which which
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  which you enjoyed more. It's a different type of
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  enjoyment, right? You can't you can't explain it.
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  It feels pure A. 100% that's exactly this.
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  That is the Lushma feeling now, by the way, the the the feeling
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  of feeling good about yourself is fine.
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  That's not Solushma Kavod, he wrote.
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  But if you run out of. Kavod, it's going.
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  To chase you, right? Are you saying there's no
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  problem a guy goes up, don't need 100,000 at the Saratoga and
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  I feels good coming? Then no, no, no, I'm talking
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  about the good feeling of taking everything care of him.
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  And sorry that that feeling of the publicity of it is there a
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  problem is not a problem. Because at the end of the day,
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  that guy is giving a very generous amount and he, he, his
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  kids see it. And I have not seen and proven
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  the other way to work, which means people who say I give
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  privately, I give probably and it works and I could see.
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  I haven't seen enough of it to see that it's proof.
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  I don't know that other thing has worked.
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  The children of generous people are generous because they
• 20:13
  believe it's their father's source to their father's success
• 20:16
  and just it's natural to them. If you think about the numbers
• 20:19
  that are given on this community, on the amounts and
• 20:21
  the percentages, what people have doesn't make sense.
• 20:25
  You find out people can give out so much money.
• 20:27
  They're not extra, extra crazy wealth thing, but they give big
• 20:30
  numbers. How do you explain it?
• 20:32
  They believe it's part of the system.
• 20:34
  How did they become part of the system?
• 20:35
  Because they have publicity. So it's very important that we
• 20:38
  have what we have. Very important again, because
• 20:40
  you want to have a little bit on the side.
• 20:42
  It's quiet and private and that you tell only your children
• 20:47
  eventually when they're able to understand it.
• 20:49
  And that builds this kind of full portfolio of I'm doing, I'm
• 20:53
  providing, I'm publicizing buildings that drive of the
• 20:56
  community. But I also have Alishma.
• 20:58
  To me now. Would it be perfect world?
• 21:00
  Like you said, the perfect world would be all quiet.
• 21:03
  I'm Mr. Anonymous. You risk, I believe that
• 21:07
  children are not doing the same unless they really follow.
• 21:10
  And you also risk yourself not feeling obligated because no
• 21:14
  one's asking you and no one's pushing you and no one's
• 21:17
  expecting of you to be that guy. You're risking that too.
• 21:20
  So there's a good blend that a person needs to have is.
• 21:22
  This like Obama has is. Is there any of the Hakamim that
• 21:30
  wrote stuff about? It's funny.
• 21:32
  No, I don't think that this is a common thing.
• 21:34
  No, I know that everyone talks about it when, you know, years
• 21:37
  ago the the layman decided that we should publicize the other
• 21:41
  people give. People say that all the time.
• 21:43
  I don't know if it's written about him anywhere say no women
• 21:47
  or the idea publicizing or to get others to give.
• 21:51
  The plaques and this and this. Blacks is definitely talking
• 21:53
  about all the time, but the idea of a guy getting up in a shoe
• 21:57
  and saying a big number and everyone saying wow.
• 21:59
  And then then the the the risk of levels.
• 22:02
  I know all these things, but it's worth it because you're
• 22:05
  getting the community to give and it's reality we're seeing in
• 22:07
  front of our eyes. Is that printed anywhere?
• 22:10
  I don't know. So firstly, very swine movement.
• 22:13
  Ashkenazim I was talking to a rabbi label from the Hubbat say
• 22:18
  like. What should I know?
• 22:19
  Yeah, because he was making a joke.
• 22:21
  I have the ability me better now.
• 22:23
  And he goes, yeah, I got to make sure that the factory in China
• 22:26
  has enough plaques for the Syrians.
• 22:29
  Yeah, as the guy. But the guy who who donated the
• 22:33
  whole ballroom or whatever, it's a little thing that says
• 22:36
  Goldberg family, right? You don't even see it.
• 22:39
  Yeah. But is that right?
• 22:40
  See, that's the time. Is that right?
• 22:41
  Because you have his kids and you have, you know.
• 22:44
  No, I think proof was in the pudding because I didn't really
• 22:47
  ever think about it. But you're right.
• 22:49
  Children of generous people. Well, you could go to a child of
• 22:54
  a, of a, of a guy who used to give a lot of money.
• 22:56
  So look, your father used to help us with this.
• 22:58
  Can we count on you? As long as the guy's in the same
• 23:00
  caliber still the the answer is probably 90% yes.
• 23:04
  They feel inclined. People feel inclined what they
• 23:06
  did this year. People feel inclined what other
• 23:08
  people see. All these things are are
• 23:10
  helpful. So I think overall, technically
• 23:13
  speaking, is it les schma at its core or it's not, but is that
• 23:16
  something to blame? No, nobody's really les schma.
• 23:19
  If we were a perfect world and we were all the schma and you
• 23:23
  wouldn't need these other motives.
• 23:24
  So OK, guys got extra amount of money.
• 23:26
  He feels bad for he wants to take care of institutions and
• 23:29
  the poor. He'll give, he'll give, he'll
• 23:30
  give more all than that. So therefore let's utilize this
• 23:34
  drive, but let's keep a little bit of the schma on everything
• 23:37
  we do. That's that's my own personal
• 23:40
  idea of a plan that is good Omnum.
• 23:43
  A balance. The balance of reality Balance.
• 23:46
  Exactly. But yeah, but it's out so.
• 23:49
  But it's an obligation, right? As Jim tells.
• 23:52
  Us the obligation is not to this degree the amounts of people are
• 23:55
  giving are way above the obligation no one's high up to
• 23:57
  give these numbers we're. Not talking.
• 23:59
  About these numbers, they give like give me 20%, they're giving
• 24:02
  a lot of. Money, guys that make the 300
• 24:04
  grand and they're giving, you know, 100,000 and stuff like
• 24:07
  that. Right.
• 24:08
  These people go, just go. And why maybe a lot of motors
• 24:11
  involved, maybe the degrees of cover, it might be the thing
• 24:15
  that's going to lead to mobile. Fine, that's OK.
• 24:18
  Maybe again, somebody with a Better Business deal, right?
• 24:21
  See. There's a lot of there's things
• 24:23
  there. Person's got to be careful even
• 24:32
  if they're doing don't mix in some degree of sin, which we'll
• 24:38
  see more of this. Also, fortunately, there's a lot
• 24:42
  of guys in the. Those businesses, yeah.
• 24:45
  Right. They like to throw.
• 24:47
  It's like an advertisement so they could get investors.
• 24:50
  Oh, wow, this guy's throwing money.
• 24:53
  Oh, you know what? It's good to invest.
• 24:54
  What do you say to that? What is that?
• 24:55
  That's not that's business. It's not that I'm a I'm a
• 25:00
  slowish ma. That's not like he's doing him
• 25:02
  as fast as much money. Doing it for Saturday is not it.
• 25:04
  Was true. I know, I know somebody.
• 25:06
  The guy did that and he gave. Money.
• 25:08
  Big money. Did he pay it?
• 25:11
  Yeah, of course. Was he happy to give you?
• 25:12
  It's like an advertisement. He's not.
• 25:14
  The guy gets big money, so people think that he's wealthy.
• 25:16
  Yeah, right. That's flat out sort of smart,
• 25:19
  making a big guy, like making a big wedding after people.
• 25:23
  People deal for that same reason also.
• 25:25
  OK, that's just random business deals.
• 25:27
  Nothing. They may also get to the fringe
• 25:29
  benefits of keeping charity. That's all it is.
• 25:32
  It's not even paying the tax. Huh.
• 25:35
  And it's paying the. Tax.
• 25:36
  That's all. He's all.
• 25:38
  He's all right, Zara. Right as it is, he's overpaying
• 25:41
  for he has to buy a a nice office, have a nice shop car for
• 25:44
  business. He has to pay big charity for
• 25:46
  business, got a big name. But he says he talks about the
• 25:50
  concern is when people blend in, not only Shiloh Shma, some
• 25:54
  degree of sin in the holy work, which is the money that I got
• 25:57
  from the right place or I don't know, other things that can come
• 26:01
  up. And that's already a real Shiloh
• 26:03
  Shma, which you got to get away from, OK, you know, and the
• 26:07
  fights for the sake of mitzvot and all these things, those are
• 26:09
  all not good. Those all need to be problems.
• 26:12
  But the core of the concept of today is that a person is normal
• 26:17
  to involve some degree or personal motive.
• 26:20
  You're being fake with yourself if you expect yourself to be
• 26:24
  perfect. I understand that even that is
• 26:26
  not the ultimate goal. Ultimate goal is a purpose.
• 26:29
  And that purpose, even those who publicly give is our chosen to
• 26:33
  give for my name to live on, for the community to see.
• 26:36
  Those are purposes not for my, you know, the noise in the crowd
• 26:40
  when you and all that stuff. That is not a real purpose.
• 26:45
  That's Shula Shma. Is that wrong?
• 26:47
  That's a terrible no. That's not the core goal.
• 26:50
  And eventually our plan is to reach a zone where everything
• 26:55
  we're doing is solely for the sake of moving everything
• 26:58
  forward, moving ourself forward, our kids forward, our name
• 27:01
  forward for the future. I have 220 even.
• 27:04
  That's the thing and the community to move forward.
• 27:08
  If you do that, it's blending you slowly, SHMA with Lishma and
• 27:11
  you're getting into the right sound.
• 27:12
  That's the idea.