Latest / Pursuit of Sassiness / 90 Day Fiancé Couple Marissa and Edward Are Married! …Now what??

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90 Day Fiancé Couple Marissa and Edward Are Married! …Now what?? · Pursuit of Sassiness

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: Hey there, everybody, and welcome to I Do Part Two,
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: the show where if you got love right the first
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: time around, this is not the podcast for you. We
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: are two of your hosts, Amy Robach, two in front
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: of me here, and TJ Holmes here. We are excited
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: to invite two guests on today. But one of them
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: we've had as a guest before, and she brought along
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: a guy, Rose, that I don't know how we should feel.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: She had to lie to us about him the first
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: time we talked to her.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: Well, lying by omission.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Yes, same thing. We're saying the same thing.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: She couldn't tell us what ended up happening with her
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: and her betrothed. Of course, we are talking about, well,
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: I think most people know we love the show 90
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: Day Fiancee. And we are so excited to welcome back
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: to the podcast, Marissa. But this time she is joined
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: by her husband, Edward.
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: So it's true.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: You two got married and we were all watching.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: And Marissa, I said to you right before we jumped
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: back onto the podcast, I said, when you were with
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: us last, we weren't supposed to know whether or not
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: you two ended up getting married at the end of
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: the 90 days.
• 1:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: When every time you were talking about Edward, you had
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: a smile on your face.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: So I left.
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: We were actually in person in studio and we left.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: And I said to TJ, they definitely got married. Did
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: you see the look on her face when she spoke
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: about him?
• 1:49
  Speaker 3: So how are you all doing? Great.
• 1:52
  Speaker 5: I mean, listen, it's hard to hide happiness. So, of course,
• 1:54
  Speaker 5: I was smiling when I talk about him. It was
• 1:57
  Speaker 5: really hard to keep that secret inside because I wanted
• 2:00
  Speaker 5: to shout from the rooftops.
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: Hey, we got married.
• 2:02
  Speaker 5: We survived like we are great.
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: But yeah, like our marriage, listen, everything, just like everybody's marriages,
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: it has ups and downs.
• 2:10
  Speaker 5: And we've been through quite the roller coaster since the
• 2:14
  Speaker 5: start of filming till even now.
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: But right now, I think we're in a good place.
• 2:19
  Speaker 5: Right now, I think that our communication is like 10
• 2:22
  Speaker 5: out of 10.
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: All right. Well, Edward, before we get to your communication,
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: Edward and Marissa, we do have to ask, how long
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: did you actually have to keep this secret? How many
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: months are we talking that you couldn't be out there
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: in public? Yeah.
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: So- No, we haven't even been married for a year.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: It feels like one, though. Edward, you can't forget your
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: anniversary before the first year anniversary, man.
• 2:45
  Speaker 6: Come on. No, the thing is like.
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: He's thinking from when, what?
• 2:50
  Speaker 6: Yeah, so like I have a year in the United
• 2:52
  Speaker 6: States already.
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: So we've been keeping it a secret for nine months.
• 2:57
  Speaker 6: Wow.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: That's a long time.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: How the hell do you do that?
• 3:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's, I mean, listen, not easy, right? Because people
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: go out. He always has to leave the house with
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: no wedding ring on.
• 3:06
  Speaker 5: I mean, sometimes I forget, but I was like, whenever
• 3:09
  Speaker 5: somebody sees us in public, I'm like, hi, like put
• 3:11
  Speaker 5: my hand behind me.
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: And it's hard to keep it a secret.
• 3:15
  Speaker 5: Also, one of the most exciting things that you do
• 3:18
  Speaker 5: in your life is get married and not being able
• 3:22
  Speaker 5: to post wedding pictures and announcements that we're married on
• 3:26
  Speaker 5: your social media is hard because you want to show
• 3:29
  Speaker 5: the world how happy you are. Yeah.
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: And we didn't have that opportunity, but now that I
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: have the green light.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: And it's so interesting you say show the world because
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: so many of us are used to putting our best
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: foot forward. Anytime we post anything on social media, anytime
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: we announce anything or we let people into our lives,
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: we usually present the best version of ourselves, the best
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: version of our relationship. But you all were on full display,
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: the good, the bad, the ugly. And we actually just
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: finished watching part two of the Tell All reunion. And look,
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: as you pointed out, lots of ups and downs. But
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: I'm curious, what's it like having those ups and downs
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: with the rest of America commenting on those ups and downs?
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: How has that impacted your relationship?
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: A lot. I think it's been really hard.
• 4:22
  Speaker 4: I mean.
• 4:23
  Speaker 3: Well, not for me.
• 4:24
  Speaker 6: Well, that's not true.
• 4:28
  Speaker 5: We had some struggles because I think that when we filmed,
• 4:31
  Speaker 5: we had this agreement that when the show finally started
• 4:34
  Speaker 5: to air, we.
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: Would not be affected by it.
• 4:36
  Speaker 5: You know, we were going to like hold hands and
• 4:39
  Speaker 5: stick by each other's side and not get affected by
• 4:41
  Speaker 5: the things that were said because that's in the past.
• 4:44
  Speaker 5: And that is a lot easier than it sounds because
• 4:47
  Speaker 5: you're watching, you know, every Sunday night we'd sit here
• 4:49
  Speaker 5: on the couch, we'd watch the show and then Every
• 4:52
  Speaker 5: now and then you catch a look of Edward going, what.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: Did you say? Or I look at him and I'm like,
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: why would you say that?
• 4:59
  Speaker 5: And, you know, you kind of replay those moments and
• 5:02
  Speaker 5: you replay the emotions, even though it happened.
• 5:04
  Speaker 3: A while ago, it's reigniting inside of you.
• 5:07
  Speaker 5: And then you start to kind of have a little
• 5:09
  Speaker 5: bit of friction between one another.
• 5:11
  Speaker 4: And by the way, things that people don't know is
• 5:14
  Speaker 4: that we don't know what they're going to put in
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: a TV, you know?
• 5:18
  Speaker 6: So basically it's the same thing.
• 5:21
  Speaker 4: Exciting what somebody see for the first time. Because I
• 5:25
  Speaker 4: don't see his solos when she talk by herself and
• 5:29
  Speaker 4: she don't see mine. So all the time that we
• 5:31
  Speaker 4: sit down and we see like, oh, well you saved
• 5:34
  Speaker 4: this one, it's yours.
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: Did you really do that? Is that a real statement?
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: Am I hearing you all correctly, Edward, that watching the
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: show damn near calls the fight every Sunday?
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: Basically, the wedding episode, things have calmed down.
• 5:50
  Speaker 5: But to go back to your question about having the
• 5:53
  Speaker 5: world comment on your relationship, I think that I never
• 5:57
  Speaker 5: we never.
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: Anticipated it to be this difficult because. Think about, I mean,
• 6:02
  Speaker 3: you guys are a couple.
• 6:02
  Speaker 5: You have your ups and downs, but you're friends and
• 6:04
  Speaker 5: you have them. They're not married yet, but soon, hopefully, right?
• 6:08
  Speaker 5: They don't want to talk about it.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: It's about you guys right now.
• 6:14
  Speaker 6: I'm sorry. I'm Dominican.
• 6:19
  Speaker 5: So most normal people have their fights in private and
• 6:24
  Speaker 5: we had them in front of the country or in
• 6:25
  Speaker 5: front of the world and people don't see the whole fight.
• 6:29
  Speaker 5: People don't see all of the elements of the discussion
• 6:32
  Speaker 5: and they have a very narrow view from what they see.
• 6:35
  Speaker 5: Now I understand that, you know, like they're only seeing
• 6:38
  Speaker 5: certain parts of it and they test judgment. But when
• 6:40
  Speaker 5: you see something posted about you online and you're like,
• 6:43
  Speaker 5: that's not me. That's not how I am. That's not
• 6:47
  Speaker 5: how I meant that line or how I meant that sentence.
• 6:50
  Speaker 5: And it's people are mean, you know, we, I feel,
• 6:53
  Speaker 5: I mean, Edward got, Edward had it easy. You know,
• 6:56
  Speaker 5: everybody loves Edward for Edward. Edward should have run from Marissa.
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: We do. Everybody loves.
• 7:05
  Speaker 6: Edward.
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: Everybody loves Edward. That should be his new spinoff show.
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: But yeah, it was really hard for me.
• 7:15
  Speaker 5: And I struggled quite a bit with a lot of
• 7:17
  Speaker 5: the commentary and feeling really, really misunderstood.
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: Can I ask both of you all here, not that
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: you all are not trying to get you to trash
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: producers in any way, but more so, you know, they
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: have to leave some stuff on the cutting room floor.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: But can you all think of anything that you think
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: was really and even almost intentionally misrepresented you all? in
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: some way, short of some stuff just having to be
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: edited out. You said a lot?
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: A lot.
• 7:45
  Speaker 4: A lot.
• 7:46
  Speaker 6: Even, like, they make a meme. A meme.
• 7:49
  Speaker 4: A meme with some part that she's saying, like, loyal boys.
• 7:55
  Speaker 4: This is a big one. And, like, they just say that... Oh,
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: you want to be in the camera?
• 7:59
  Speaker 6: Say hi.
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: Okay, so, Rocky, get down, honey.
• 8:06
  Speaker 4: So.
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: What.
• 8:08
  Speaker 4: Happened is, like, we have a conversation, and We started
• 8:12
  Speaker 4: arguing for something, you know, and I was doing this
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: in the table.
• 8:16
  Speaker 5: I was just banging the table. He was raising his voice.
• 8:21
  Speaker 5: He was speaking very calmly.
• 8:23
  Speaker 6: And then she say, lawyer boy. So everybody said, you're
• 8:26
  Speaker 6: in the restaurant, right?
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I need to take accountability for this.
• 8:34
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I was doing this.
• 8:36
  Speaker 5: But it wasn't lower your voice. It was lower your
• 8:39
  Speaker 5: voice with the clenched teeth because I was angry and
• 8:41
  Speaker 5: I was embarrassed. And I was like, we're in a
• 8:44
  Speaker 5: public place, stop. And it kind of looked like he
• 8:48
  Speaker 5: was speaking calmly and I was overreacting. It did.
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: It 100% did.
• 8:52
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: They even use that, I think, in teases, like in
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: bumps and commercial breaks. they emphasize that moment a lot.
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: That is really interesting to hear that it didn't go
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: down the way we actually saw it.
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 9:05
  Speaker 5: Now I will admit the restaurant scene was highly emotional.
• 9:11
  Speaker 5: I was very, you know, that was a long day
• 9:12
  Speaker 5: of filming. I really wanted to just have a nice
• 9:16
  Speaker 5: evening together. We wanted to enjoy. He, he is very
• 9:20
  Speaker 5: emotional and he is sensitive and he likes to get
• 9:25
  Speaker 5: deep into conversation. He likes to, you know, express emotions
• 9:28
  Speaker 5: and sometimes my brain's not there and I want to
• 9:31
  Speaker 5: just have a light evening and have fun. And so
• 9:34
  Speaker 5: I was already kind of temperamental and I was hungry and,
• 9:38
  Speaker 5: or hangry as we talked about on the show, hungry
• 9:40
  Speaker 5: and angry. And yeah, so I take accountability for that
• 9:45
  Speaker 5: moment in the restaurant because I was highly agitated for
• 9:47
  Speaker 5: a lot of different reasons. And yeah, So they didn't
• 9:50
  Speaker 5: paint the picture that I was like this angel. I mean,
• 9:54
  Speaker 5: they painted the picture of what they were, what they
• 9:56
  Speaker 5: were filming, which was accurate, but it's just funny that
• 9:58
  Speaker 5: I said, lower your voice. And he, at that the
• 10:01
  Speaker 5: scene right before the sentence right before was him being calm.
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: So that was a little misleading, I think.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: That makes sense. I am so fascinated by this because
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: obviously fights are so difficult and so personal. And even
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: when you work past them or you get through them,
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: it's not like everything's resolved. So the idea of having
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: to go back and watch an edited version of your fight.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: together months after it happened. I think about that and
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: I actually want to crawl underneath the table.
• 10:34
  Speaker 3: Like that sounds excruciating. Yeah.
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: Did you have to re, did you have to go
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: over what you were fighting about again to get through it?
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: Did it make you.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: Stronger in the end? I'm just curious how you made
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: it past watching those episodes back. That sounds awful.
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it was hard. I mean, I'll give you a
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: really good example.
• 10:58
  Speaker 5: There was a big moment during the season where I
• 11:00
  Speaker 5: questioned Edward's intelligence, or at least it was framed that way.
• 11:05
  Speaker 5: And the point I was really trying to make was
• 11:07
  Speaker 5: because of our language barrier.
• 11:08
  Speaker 3: Listen, he speaks English well.
• 11:10
  Speaker 5: Thank God, because if he didn't speak English, we probably
• 11:12
  Speaker 5: wouldn't have a relationship. But it's very hard to communicate well.
• 11:20
  Speaker 5: deep emotional feelings because he doesn't understand every word in
• 11:23
  Speaker 5: English is not his first language. Now, if I spoke
• 11:25
  Speaker 5: fluent Spanish, it would be a lot easier to communicate.
• 11:27
  Speaker 5: And we probably meet eye to eye on a lot
• 11:29
  Speaker 5: of things, but, uh, hit the inability to communicate in
• 11:34
  Speaker 5: both of our first languages together, put a little stress
• 11:37
  Speaker 5: in the relationship. And I started questioning, like, am I
• 11:39
  Speaker 5: going to be fulfilled? Am I going to be able
• 11:41
  Speaker 5: to express myself? Am I going to be able to
• 11:42
  Speaker 5: have deep conversations with this person? And it was really
• 11:45
  Speaker 5: just because of the language barrier. But it came off.
• 11:48
  Speaker 5: And I admit it. It came off like I was
• 11:50
  Speaker 5: questioning his intelligence. And am I going to be stimulated,
• 11:53
  Speaker 5: you know, from an intelligence point of view or whatever?
• 11:58
  Speaker 5: And that episode came out where I'm talking with my friends.
• 12:02
  Speaker 5: And I said that, you know, is he going to
• 12:04
  Speaker 5: be able to stimulate me intellectually? And it came off
• 12:08
  Speaker 5: just the way that it sounded, you know, really bad.
• 12:11
  Speaker 5: He didn't know that because this was a scene that.
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: He wasn't there. I was just there with my girlfriends.
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: He watches back.
• 12:17
  Speaker 5: We were actually separated because he was traveling for baseball
• 12:20
  Speaker 5: and he was.
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: In what we were in Georgia.
• 12:22
  Speaker 6: No, I was in. Yeah, I was in Georgia.
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 12:24
  Speaker 5: And I immediately saw the episode and I was like cringing.
• 12:28
  Speaker 5: I was like, oh, my God. I was like, that
• 12:29
  Speaker 5: looks so bad. And I feel so bad. So I
• 12:31
  Speaker 5: immediately went online and I said, listen, I am not.
• 12:34
  Speaker 5: I am not questioning his intelligence. I don't think he's
• 12:37
  Speaker 5: an idiot. It's just that we struggle to communicate sometimes
• 12:40
  Speaker 5: because of the language barrier. Well, I got lots of
• 12:41
  Speaker 5: hate on that post for starters. But then when the
• 12:45
  Speaker 5: episode actually came out, he.
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: Got very upset. Very upset.
• 12:48
  Speaker 5: Even though I prefaced the episode, like I said, listen,
• 12:51
  Speaker 5: you're probably not going to like this. This is what
• 12:53
  Speaker 5: I meant. But he got livid. And we were in
• 12:55
  Speaker 5: separate states because he was traveling. And he was like,
• 12:58
  Speaker 5: I'm not having this. This is out of line. I
• 13:01
  Speaker 5: cannot believe that you embarrass me on national TV.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: And I felt bad.
• 13:05
  Speaker 5: And he finally put his foot down with me. He
• 13:07
  Speaker 5: finally gave it to me. And I kind of quivered like, like,
• 13:11
  Speaker 5: I really upset this man and I felt really bad
• 13:13
  Speaker 5: about it. So reliving that and having to explain and
• 13:19
  Speaker 5: work that fight out was a really good. communication exercise
• 13:24
  Speaker 5: in our relationship because I had to really explain what
• 13:26
  Speaker 5: I meant, but he was very upset and it was
• 13:28
  Speaker 5: really hard for us to get through those couple of weeks.
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: I mean, it lasted.
• 13:32
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: Can you put in your words what it was like
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: to watch the woman you were going to marry speak
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: to you in such a way or about you in
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: such a way, literally behind your back, but then the
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: whole world and including your family, your loved ones could
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: see that.
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: So like, yeah, like for me, it was very hard because, um,
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: I think no matter what I can say, I'm not
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: going to find a way to put her down. And
• 13:59
  Speaker 4: at that moment, that's what I was feeling. I have
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: families and friends that everybody see the clip and start
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: to text me, call me, like, why'd you say that?
• 14:10
  Speaker 6: Why'd you do that?
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: And I was in a game in that moment. And
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: I have the ability. She was texting me and speaking
• 14:15
  Speaker 4: to me. I said, she needs to say something so
• 14:17
  Speaker 4: horrible that everybody started to text me and call me.
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: And I don't have the available to like answer and respond.
• 14:24
  Speaker 4: So when I finally go down and I finally put
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: a moment between the games, because it's a whole tournament
• 14:30
  Speaker 4: and I just sit down and see it, I was
• 14:32
  Speaker 4: like in shock and I need to focus with the boys.
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: Like it was very hard for me, you know, but like, yeah,
• 14:38
  Speaker 4: like things like this, uh, work a lot in the
• 14:43
  Speaker 4: point that we are right now, you know?
• 14:46
  Speaker 5: You know, the funny thing is, is that, yeah, I've
• 14:47
  Speaker 5: had different life experiences than Edward and that's, Just because
• 14:51
  Speaker 5: of age, I've.
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: Been on this earth 13 years more. But you know
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: what's interesting.
• 14:57
  Speaker 5: About him is that he has such a high level
• 15:00
  Speaker 5: of EQ, emotional intelligence, that I can never compete with.
• 15:03
  Speaker 5: He has the ability to really see into people and
• 15:07
  Speaker 5: support them and nurture them and have patience with them.
• 15:09
  Speaker 5: So far beyond what I'm able to offer to most.
• 15:14
  Speaker 5: So I think that that balances us out.
• 15:17
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: I'm also curious too, because you talked about those asides
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: that you don't know what the other person is saying
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: to camera. But Edward, I'm even wondering because I know
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: that you can understand, I think most people can understand
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: why there would be a level of suspicion about wanting
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: a green card.
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: Or what's his real motivation.
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: But to hear Marissa's mom, who you obviously are going
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: to have a relationship with going forward, or you would
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: hope to, to hear those conversations about you. Normally, these
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: things happen, but none of us actually are privy to them.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: None of us actually get to see what people are
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: saying about us privately.
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: Wait, your mom talks about me?
• 16:08
  Speaker 3: She says really nice things about you.
• 16:09
  Speaker 4: Seriously?
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: But I'm saying that has to be such an added
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: layer of tension. to have access to those conversations about
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: you while you're not there with people who you're going
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: to have a relationship with going forward. If you end
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: up getting married, what was, how did you navigate that?
• 16:30
  Speaker 6: So, um, first of all, I love you and Joanne
• 16:33
  Speaker 6: is amazing.
• 16:34
  Speaker 4: Um, and what she say is the true. I just
• 16:41
  Speaker 4: learned something's very important. early in my life that I
• 16:44
  Speaker 4: think has helped me with a lot of things. And
• 16:46
  Speaker 4: it's like, I need to love everybody in the way
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: that they are. I'm not here for change nobody. I
• 16:53
  Speaker 4: like her in the way that she is, you know,
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: maybe a couple of things, but like, like older than that.
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: But yeah, like, because of that, I can put myself
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: in the person's shoes.
• 17:06
  Speaker 6: And it was true.
• 17:07
  Speaker 4: Like, she don't know me. I'm 13 years younger than her.
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: You know, I'm coming for, my country is not a third,
• 17:15
  Speaker 4: third world country, but it's almost, you know, and a
• 17:19
  Speaker 4: lot of people in my country, they just want to
• 17:20
  Speaker 4: come to United States, you know? And yeah, like his
• 17:26
  Speaker 4: fears and all the things.
• 17:28
  Speaker 6: That she was expressed was right.
• 17:31
  Speaker 4: And I'm okay with this because for not for one year,
• 17:35
  Speaker 4: not for two, not for five, for the rest of
• 17:38
  Speaker 4: my life, I need to deal with the people judgment
• 17:41
  Speaker 4: because I, Right now, everybody feel.
• 17:43
  Speaker 6: Like, oh, when I got my grant card that I have.
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: Already, he got to left. Then they got to say, well,
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: he got to wait to be a senior American. And
• 17:52
  Speaker 4: then they got to, oh, 10 years. It's always a
• 17:56
  Speaker 4: question about if I'm with her with the right reason.
• 18:00
  Speaker 6: Whatever is outside us, I really don't care.
• 18:03
  Speaker 4: As soon as she understand that I'm with her with
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: the right reason, it's not a problem.
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: Can i ask where does that come from were you
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: just raised that way did you train yourself because i
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: think what you said is very useful to everybody in
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: relationships you said i can stop and put myself in
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: that person's shoes and that helps you navigate some conflicts
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: is that just how you were raised around people like
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: that you just naturally develop but that's a very good
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: tool in relationships you.
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: Know like i think i'm too weird i'm a bit
• 18:31
  Speaker 4: too a lot you know on and one of the
• 18:34
  Speaker 4: things like Like my brain is like when I lose
• 18:39
  Speaker 4: my dad. So my dad was like everything for me.
• 18:42
  Speaker 4: So when he was a funny guy, he was making
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: everybody laughing, you know, and he passed away in a
• 18:49
  Speaker 4: year later, nobody remembered him. So made me realize that
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: no matter what, how many effort you can do it
• 18:56
  Speaker 4: with somebody else, uh, people are going to remember you
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: in the moment, just important people in your life.
• 19:04
  Speaker 6: Gotta remember you always.
• 19:05
  Speaker 4: So after that, I just stopped care about opinions for everybody.
• 19:11
  Speaker 4: And I just started like care about myself. And I,
• 19:16
  Speaker 4: in that moment, I just realized the real concept about
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: being loved or love someone. I think that this is
• 19:30
  Speaker 4: something that is confused for everybody. Like, My opinion.
• 19:34
  Speaker 6: I'm just thinking. I'm just translating my brain. I'm sorry
• 19:37
  Speaker 6: for that.
• 19:38
  Speaker 4: So it's basically like being in love with someone is
• 19:43
  Speaker 4: love the person in the level that they require. Not
• 19:47
  Speaker 4: in the level that I require. Because we are different people.
• 19:51
  Speaker 4: So basically, when she get mad, she need space. When
• 19:56
  Speaker 4: I get mad, I need affection. So what happens if
• 20:02
  Speaker 4: she get mad and I'm going to hug her? When
• 20:05
  Speaker 4: she need space, she got to be irritated. She's got
• 20:08
  Speaker 4: to be more upset because she needs space. So when
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: you understand that and you.
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: They understand.
• 20:15
  Speaker 6: I did. I just see myself.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: That's hilarious. Because, yes, we get in a fight. Me
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: and Marissa will be off in the corner somewhere.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: On our own.
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: And I want affection.
• 20:25
  Speaker 3: I want reassurance.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: You two can hug it out.
• 20:29
  Speaker 3: He's like, I need space. I'm like, no.
• 20:34
  Speaker 4: So, yeah, like, when you realize that and you understand that,
• 20:40
  Speaker 4: I need to love her in the way that she
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: requests and not in the way that I request, make
• 20:46
  Speaker 4: me understand that I need to stop doing things that
• 20:51
  Speaker 4: I really want and start doing things that she wants. Yeah.
• 20:57
  Speaker 5: You know, it's been like that in our relationship where,
• 21:02
  Speaker 5: you know, he's very affectionate, wants affection all the time.
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: And I'm not really affectionate. I show my love in
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: other ways.
• 21:07
  Speaker 5: And we're now in this point in our marriage where
• 21:10
  Speaker 5: we're really trying to meet each other in the middle
• 21:12
  Speaker 5: where I'm really trying to be more affectionate and show
• 21:14
  Speaker 5: him that he's valued and appreciated. And he's trying to understand.
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: That when I need space, it's give it to me.
• 21:23
  Speaker 5: But can I circle back to one other thing, too,
• 21:25
  Speaker 5: about the comments and Edward's intentions with the green card?
• 21:29
  Speaker 5: It's really interesting, just talking about the.
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: Impact of the show on our relationship. When we.
• 21:36
  Speaker 5: Entered into the K-1 visa process, I had zero doubts
• 21:40
  Speaker 5: in my mind that he was ever using me for
• 21:41
  Speaker 5: a green card, ever. And it was important for me
• 21:45
  Speaker 5: to show the world through the show that.
• 21:50
  Speaker 5: Our relationship is genuine. He's not the person that's going
• 21:52
  Speaker 5: to be taking advantage of me. He's going to share
• 21:56
  Speaker 5: equal weight in this household and responsibilities, both physically and financially.
• 22:01
  Speaker 5: And teaching him about the ways of the world in
• 22:05
  Speaker 5: the United States was something that was a real thing
• 22:07
  Speaker 5: because he had to learn a lot in order to
• 22:09
  Speaker 5: be an equal partner to me. I wasn't going to
• 22:11
  Speaker 5: be this older woman, the stereotypical older woman that brings
• 22:14
  Speaker 5: I love.
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: That people call you a cabana boy. You were never
• 22:16
  Speaker 3: a cabana.
• 22:17
  Speaker 5: That's a cabana boy, you know, back from vacation. That
• 22:21
  Speaker 5: was never the case with us. We genuinely fell in
• 22:23
  Speaker 5: love and it was a real story. He also had
• 22:26
  Speaker 5: this agenda in his mind that he wanted to prove
• 22:28
  Speaker 5: to the world that he wasn't using me, you know,
• 22:31
  Speaker 5: and that was, you know, so I'm on this, this
• 22:33
  Speaker 5: side saying like, nobody's going to think that I'm being
• 22:35
  Speaker 5: taken advantage of. And he's on this side saying, I'm
• 22:38
  Speaker 5: going to show that I'm not taking advantage of her.
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: And it's really polarizing.
• 22:42
  Speaker 5: So I think that that's how our personas were formed,
• 22:45
  Speaker 5: you know, and the narrative is I'm going to be this,
• 22:48
  Speaker 5: you know, hard-nosed, direct person. He's going to be very
• 22:52
  Speaker 5: accommodating and show me that he's here for the right reasons.
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: But when you ask about.
• 22:56
  Speaker 5: The green card, it's hard when we talk about comments
• 23:01
  Speaker 5: because I would read the comments and somehow they get.
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: Planted in your brain. So if we would get into
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: a fight. I'd be like, oh, I see.
• 23:07
  Speaker 5: You're just going to be mad at me because you
• 23:09
  Speaker 5: want to do this, and now you have your green card,
• 23:10
  Speaker 5: so you're going to get lost.
• 23:13
  Speaker 2: Marissa, you didn't pull that out during the argument, did you?
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: You didn't say that.
• 23:18
  Speaker 6: I did.
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: Those comments start to infiltrate your brain. You start believing
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: what you read. You do. You start to question.
• 23:26
  Speaker 5: The intention and, and I don't feel that way. And my, my,
• 23:29
  Speaker 5: my heart tells me that he is very 100% genuine.
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: Sometimes I pull it out.
• 23:34
  Speaker 5: I'm like, Oh, Oh, I guess now you're just going
• 23:36
  Speaker 5: to go and find all the ladies that send you
• 23:38
  Speaker 5: pictures on Instagram and stuff like that.
• 23:39
  Speaker 6: That's fear.
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: That's fear.
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: And that's the fear of losing him, fear of him
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: walking away, fear of being a fool and not seeing
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: it for what it is. And yes, all those comments
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: can get in your head. That's why we don't read comments.
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: It's an amazing thing to choose. not to do um
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: because we've just we've been there we know what it's
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: like to be on the receiving end of that and
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: it's damaging.
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: And not that you're all here for advice from us
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: but this is some that we can give through learned
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: experience don't do anything in your relationship based on the
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: public don't make any move thinking well they're gonna think
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: this we have to do this to satisfy If you
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: all just stay focused on you and your love and
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: that house and that dog and your boys, you're going
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: to be fine. But, yeah, we've gotten caught up at times. And, well,
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: we got to do this or they'll say this about us.
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: Or to prove that.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 24:31
  Speaker 3: Right?
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: And it's just never the right thing to do. I
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: have another question for you all because where we left
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: it with you, I felt for you because you all have–
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: You've dealt with so many issues.
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: But all at once.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: You've got an age difference. You've got a language and
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: a cultural barrier. You've got judgment from folks who don't
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: believe your love is genuine. And then you've got an
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: ex-husband who is.
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: Who is being.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: Extremely difficult from what we can gather. How are you
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: navigating that? Has that gotten any better? Because the last
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: thing we saw, y'all were both in tears over not
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: only just the pot stirring that's going on, but Edward
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: not feeling supported by you, Marissa, and Marissa, you not
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: feeling understood by Edward.
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 25:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 25:20
  Speaker 5: Um, the tell-all that time period was very difficult. We
• 25:25
  Speaker 5: were in a very, very serious fight with Michael and
• 25:28
  Speaker 5: it was, it was, it was the worst it's ever
• 25:30
  Speaker 5: been in the entire time that I've been, maybe not,
• 25:32
  Speaker 5: maybe I'm forgetting some horrible puns, but like, it was
• 25:35
  Speaker 5: really bad.
• 25:35
  Speaker 6: Let's put it that way.
• 25:37
  Speaker 5: And we were, you know, Michael had the opportunity to
• 25:41
  Speaker 5: come to the tell-all and, you know, defend himself and
• 25:44
  Speaker 5: he chose not to. And we said what we wanted
• 25:46
  Speaker 5: to say. So things have calmed down since the tell-all.
• 25:50
  Speaker 5: But just as we had our issues when episodes air,
• 25:56
  Speaker 5: the tell-all now airs, Michael's not happy.
• 25:57
  Speaker 3: With what we said. I can't believe you said this.
• 26:00
  Speaker 3: I can't believe that you would actually think that I
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: would do this.
• 26:03
  Speaker 5: And the flames are starting to ignite again, and in
• 26:08
  Speaker 5: not a good way. And he's, you know, starting to
• 26:12
  Speaker 5: question our intentions. And he's, you know, I'm waiting for
• 26:15
  Speaker 5: another explosion. I feel like it's really close. And, you know,
• 26:20
  Speaker 5: I mean, we're trying to navigate with him. We're trying
• 26:22
  Speaker 5: to co-parent with him and things have been okay, but
• 26:25
  Speaker 5: I just, it goes like this. It's always like this.
• 26:28
  Speaker 5: My entire life with Michael has been up and down.
• 26:31
  Speaker 5: And sometimes it's quiet and sometimes it's very quiet.
• 26:34
  Speaker 6: We try to be adults. Because this kid's involved.
• 26:38
  Speaker 4: There's two boys involved and I do understand that he
• 26:42
  Speaker 4: can feel like this because we have that. So I
• 26:44
  Speaker 4: just try to don't respond, don't get in the same
• 26:47
  Speaker 4: level You know, after the tell-all, I was like, have
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: a conversation, me and him, privately. And we just sit down,
• 26:58
  Speaker 4: take a coffee, and then say, listen, you have the
• 27:01
  Speaker 4: opportunity to say whatever you want to say now.
• 27:04
  Speaker 6: If you want to call me, like, I can talk freely.
• 27:09
  Speaker 6: I don't know. What do you want to say?
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: I say it to him, so you want to say, like,
• 27:14
  Speaker 4: ananasso or things like this, you know. And you have
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: your opportunity because this is the last opportunity that you
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: can have. I'm going to give you the freedom to
• 27:22
  Speaker 4: express yourself, you know? And I'm going to express myself.
• 27:25
  Speaker 4: And we need to finish that meeting. Agree or disagree,
• 27:30
  Speaker 4: but we need to respect and have boundaries. So we
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: sit down, we talk for a while, like three hours,
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: express yourself. He realized a lot of things. I've realized
• 27:38
  Speaker 4: a couple of things too. And we are in the
• 27:42
  Speaker 4: point that we respect each other. That's what we try
• 27:45
  Speaker 4: to do, you know?
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: Until next week.
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: Until next week. We tried to leave it on a
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: nice note there.
• 27:53
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry. He's done a lot of work.
• 27:56
  Speaker 5: He's very mature in this situation and I applaud him
• 28:00
  Speaker 5: for taking the higher road.
• 28:01
  Speaker 3: It's not always the same.
• 28:02
  Speaker 4: When I say that she don't defend you or take
• 28:08
  Speaker 4: my bad or something like that, what I try to
• 28:10
  Speaker 4: say is their reaction, their time reaction. She take my bad.
• 28:15
  Speaker 4: But like in that moment, I was feeling like it's
• 28:18
  Speaker 4: too slow. And in the way that she understands, it's better.
• 28:24
  Speaker 4: So because it happened in the moment, I was like
• 28:26
  Speaker 4: feeling guilty because I never feel guilty. And I feel
• 28:30
  Speaker 4: like giving myself the permission to be guilty. But when
• 28:33
  Speaker 4: I would sit down and analyze, well, we manage the
• 28:36
  Speaker 4: things in the right way.
• 28:37
  Speaker 6: Not because of me.
• 28:38
  Speaker 4: It's because of boys that are in the middle.
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: How old are the boys now? Remind us. How old
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: are the boys? How are they doing with you guys?
• 28:46
  Speaker 3: They are 11 and one month shy of 13.
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: How's that going with the boys? You two and the
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: marriage and everything? How's that?
• 28:54
  Speaker 6: Everything is amazing. The boys are amazing. We have a
• 28:57
  Speaker 6: very good time all the time and experience.
• 28:59
  Speaker 3: I mean, my almost teenager is.
• 29:01
  Speaker 6: It's a part. He's a teenager.
• 29:04
  Speaker 3: He's playing video games his whole life, playing baseball, which
• 29:06
  Speaker 3: is good for him and Edward to bond. But the
• 29:08
  Speaker 3: little one, my 11-year-old, is always with us. He loves
• 29:11
  Speaker 3: to like.
• 29:12
  Speaker 5: Have a lot of banter with Edward. They have a
• 29:14
  Speaker 5: hilarious relationship, but it's actually quite good. And he always
• 29:17
  Speaker 5: knows that when I say no, you go.
• 29:19
  Speaker 3: To Edward and Edward will say.
• 29:30
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: Last few things here. And I wonder if they fooled us,
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: the producers. It looked like or they made it look
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: like you all got really close maybe to not getting
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: married or things got so difficult before you said, I do.
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: Did you all get close at all to calling out?
• 29:51
  Speaker 3: I think that the 90 days really tested us. They do.
• 29:55
  Speaker 5: And there was a lot of moments that I, listen,
• 29:57
  Speaker 5: I had, My first marriage was highly unsuccessful and I
• 30:01
  Speaker 5: did not want to make another mistake. And I tend
• 30:04
  Speaker 5: to fall hard and fast. And I did that with Edward.
• 30:08
  Speaker 5: We fell in love very quickly. And we maintained a
• 30:12
  Speaker 5: relationship in two separate countries. And when we finally came
• 30:17
  Speaker 5: from living apart to living together in a second, I
• 30:21
  Speaker 5: started to realize, is this going to work for me?
• 30:25
  Speaker 5: Is this going to fit into my life? Am I
• 30:28
  Speaker 5: going to truly be happy with this person?
• 30:29
  Speaker 3: So yeah, you witnessed the truth. You witnessed the emotional.
• 30:33
  Speaker 5: Rollercoaster of me questioning, while I love him, of course
• 30:37
  Speaker 5: I love him, is this the right partner for me?
• 30:40
  Speaker 5: And is this going to be the person that I'm
• 30:42
  Speaker 5: going to take it to the end? Yeah.
• 30:44
  Speaker 3: Yes, it was not a fool.
• 30:46
  Speaker 5: I always I think in the back of my head,
• 30:48
  Speaker 5: I always knew that I wanted to marry Edward. But
• 30:50
  Speaker 5: you witnessed the emotional roller coaster of how what I
• 30:53
  Speaker 5: was going through in those 90 days because it was hard.
• 30:55
  Speaker 6: And it was the same for me.
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: Like I was married before, was seven years married. And
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: it's a lot of things that we like when we
• 31:05
  Speaker 4: end a relationship in a bad way, you have a
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: lot of trauma. So all this trauma is like basically
• 31:12
  Speaker 4: a red flag and you fight with that. So like
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: move to other country, left everything in my country and
• 31:19
  Speaker 4: see like couple little things, you know, it's fight. It's
• 31:23
  Speaker 4: a fight in my head. Like it's got to be
• 31:26
  Speaker 4: the same. She got to be there and she got
• 31:28
  Speaker 4: to change. And like, yeah, there's a lot of question
• 31:31
  Speaker 4: about it.
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: We get that.
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: And then, and I just wanted to touch on it
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: because I know this was a big theme, especially in
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: the tell-all that we just watched, but this idea that Edward,
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: you always wanted your own kids. Marissa, you're at a
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: certain age and so many couples deal with this, struggle
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: with this. Have you all figured out the way forward
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: for you all with that idea of having a child together?
• 31:54
  Speaker 5: It's still a sensitive subject for us. We agreed before
• 32:01
  Speaker 5: we got married and even very, very early on in
• 32:03
  Speaker 5: the relationship that I'm not having any kids.
• 32:06
  Speaker 3: And he accepted that. He said, I love you. I'd
• 32:07
  Speaker 3: rather be with you than have kids.
• 32:10
  Speaker 5: And I think that my suspicions about him changing his mind,
• 32:16
  Speaker 5: you know, came true a little bit, but I knew
• 32:20
  Speaker 5: that he eventually was going to feel a little bit
• 32:22
  Speaker 5: of regret by choosing a woman that wasn't able to
• 32:25
  Speaker 5: provide children with him. In the tell-all, some ideas came
• 32:29
  Speaker 5: up about surrogacy, which I get a thank you to
• 32:32
  Speaker 5: the fans. So many people are reaching out to me
• 32:34
  Speaker 5: offering to be a surrogate for our relationship.
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: So, wow.
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: That's very kind.
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 32:39
  Speaker 5: But I think in our life right now, I mean,
• 32:42
  Speaker 5: I just bought my two businesses. He's still getting grounded
• 32:48
  Speaker 5: in his financial situation. And It's just not the right
• 32:54
  Speaker 5: time for us. I mean, I know the time is
• 32:56
  Speaker 5: of the essence. I am about to be 47 years old.
• 32:59
  Speaker 5: He's still in his prime. And I know that this
• 33:00
  Speaker 5: is a conversation that we'll keep revisiting. But right now,
• 33:04
  Speaker 5: it's just not in the cards for us at this
• 33:05
  Speaker 5: very moment.
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: All right. Last couple of things. Do you have a
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: happy question to end with? Because I have one more
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: heavy question.
• 33:12
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'll come up with a happy question.
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: You have a happy question. And the reason I want
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: to ask this, Marissa and Edward, is because it did.
• 33:20
  Speaker 2: play so much of a role in this season. And Marissa,
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: you alluded to it. Everybody loves Edward. But the people
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: are coming after you from what they see as you
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: talking down to him. And so I have to ask,
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: because it was in part one or part two of
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: the tell-all, you all were getting into it. And it
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: stood out to me. And I remember you called him
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: an idiot. In the heat of the moment, you said,
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: then you're an idiot if you think blah, blah, blah, blah,
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: blah about your egg. You think I should have my
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: ex not be in the picture, blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 33:50
  Speaker 2: I hear that. And on one hand, I go, how
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: dare she do that? That's awful. And then on the
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: other hand, I have been in conversations, in heated fights
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: with this woman across the table with me, in which
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: some things were said that there's no way in hell
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: that would have come out under different circumstances and not
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: in the heat of the moment or anger. Marissa, I'm
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: giving you a second here to answer to those folks
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: who look at it and want to criticize you for
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: maybe a bad moment like that. And then there are
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: those of us who look at it and don't like it,
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: but also can go, yeah, I've said some messed up too.
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 34:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 34:29
  Speaker 5: I mean, listen, in behind closed doors, you say things
• 34:32
  Speaker 5: to your spouse that you probably wouldn't say in public. Um,
• 34:36
  Speaker 5: we are unfortunately like in front of cameras and it
• 34:38
  Speaker 5: does show the world, you know, some things that we
• 34:40
  Speaker 5: say to each other, but On a normal basis, I
• 34:43
  Speaker 5: don't insult him like that.
• 34:44
  Speaker 3: I think it was the conversation specifically. And listen, I'm
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: a New Yorker. I'm direct. If I feel this way,
• 34:49
  Speaker 3: I'm going to tell you. OK, and people don't like that.
• 34:51
  Speaker 5: I don't think people a lot of people could handle
• 34:53
  Speaker 5: that aspect of my personality. But when I said you're
• 34:56
  Speaker 5: an idiot, if you can understand that, I didn't specifically
• 34:59
  Speaker 5: say he's an idiot.
• 35:00
  Speaker 3: Edward is an idiot.
• 35:01
  Speaker 5: I said, if you can't understand that, I understand. have
• 35:05
  Speaker 5: to maintain some type of relationship with the father of
• 35:08
  Speaker 5: my children, then yeah, that's stupid. You need to think
• 35:11
  Speaker 5: more clearly about the situation. He doesn't understand it as
• 35:14
  Speaker 5: clearly as I do because I have children and he doesn't.
• 35:17
  Speaker 3: And having an ex that you have to share children
• 35:20
  Speaker 3: with is not easy, but it's a necessity. You have to.
• 35:25
  Speaker 3: So that's what I meant by that. I mean, could
• 35:26
  Speaker 3: I've used... a better choice of a word? Absolutely.
• 35:29
  Speaker 5: I mean, I regret a lot of things that I
• 35:31
  Speaker 5: say to him. I, you know, I get fiery, I
• 35:33
  Speaker 5: get heated. I'm an Italian from the Bronx and I
• 35:35
  Speaker 5: say things that sometimes I wish that I didn't say.
• 35:38
  Speaker 5: But I think, you know, I don't even know if
• 35:40
  Speaker 5: you got highly offended by that at that moment, because
• 35:42
  Speaker 5: I think it was just in the heat of the conversation.
• 35:44
  Speaker 4: Well, it didn't feel good. But this is, this is
• 35:53
  Speaker 4: the thing on in the way that I was growing.
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: is basically I've never got the permission to express myself.
• 36:04
  Speaker 6: So always I'm overthinking. I'm an overthinking person.
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: So because of that, I just want to be in
• 36:13
  Speaker 4: a hard moment. I don't say things like when I
• 36:17
  Speaker 4: get angry. I can say it, but 90% of the
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: time I don't. I just listen, understand that as I
• 36:28
  Speaker 4: It's hyper. She's angry. And I don't try to take personal.
• 36:34
  Speaker 5: I mean, I don't get angry like that very often.
• 36:37
  Speaker 3: I don't yell very often.
• 36:38
  Speaker 6: She did.
• 36:40
  Speaker 4: I gave her time next day in the morning. Then
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: when she calmed down and she realized, she like apologized.
• 36:49
  Speaker 6: And this is what is successful in our relationship right now.
• 36:54
  Speaker 4: Like when she feel that she needs to apologize because
• 36:57
  Speaker 4: she knows that she crossed the line and she says
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: something that she's not supposed to. Next day is apologize.
• 37:03
  Speaker 4: She's not coming with the bullshit that people say like this.
• 37:06
  Speaker 4: You need to accept me like that. No, she come down, realize.
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: And if she know that I'm failed, she tell me
• 37:15
  Speaker 4: and she apologize. So I need to apologize.
• 37:18
  Speaker 6: So yeah, like.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: What did you say, Marissa? Italian girl from the Bronx?
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: Is that what you said?
• 37:22
  Speaker 6: I am, yeah.
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: Who knew? An Italian girl from the Bronx and a
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: sensitive fella from the Dominican. It actually works. It does.
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: It does. I love that.
• 37:33
  Speaker 4: All right.
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: I want to ask you because some people are afraid
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: of walking down the aisle because they think marriage is
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: going to change their relationship. How has marriage changed your relationship?
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: I'd love to hear from both of you.
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: Asking for a friend.
• 37:51
  Speaker 5: I think that, well, we have a very unique situation
• 37:55
  Speaker 5: because basically we went from dating in two separate countries
• 38:00
  Speaker 5: to in an instant living together and not easing into
• 38:04
  Speaker 5: living together. I think a lot of times couples have
• 38:06
  Speaker 5: the luxury of easing into living in the same space
• 38:09
  Speaker 5: and seeing.
• 38:09
  Speaker 3: How it works.
• 38:10
  Speaker 5: And we had to make this quick decision. So in
• 38:12
  Speaker 5: one regard, I love being married because I get to
• 38:15
  Speaker 5: see Edward every day. We love cuddling at night. We
• 38:17
  Speaker 5: love sleeping in each other's arms. And that is a
• 38:19
  Speaker 5: beautiful thing, you know, that I get to experience every day.
• 38:23
  Speaker 5: I think that sometimes it's challenging to always be on
• 38:27
  Speaker 5: top of each other because yes, I like my space.
• 38:30
  Speaker 5: I like my space a lot. And I think that
• 38:33
  Speaker 5: that's been an adjustment for us. But if I were
• 38:36
  Speaker 5: to say, is it harder or easier or better or worse.
• 38:39
  Speaker 3: Now that we're married?
• 38:40
  Speaker 5: I definitely say, that it is much better now that
• 38:43
  Speaker 5: we're together and we're married.
• 38:44
  Speaker 3: And we have a commitment to one another.
• 38:46
  Speaker 5: And I do think it presents its challenges, but I
• 38:51
  Speaker 5: wouldn't change my decision in a million years.
• 38:55
  Speaker 6: Eduardo. I feel the opposite.
• 39:04
  Speaker 3: It's a joke.
• 39:09
  Speaker 6: I feel the same thing.
• 39:10
  Speaker 4: It was like, um, It's not the same when you
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: be apart and then when you like inside that I
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: see what she did and she see what I did,
• 39:21
  Speaker 4: you know, is difficult. Like if I like things in
• 39:24
  Speaker 4: a certain way and she like things in a certain way.
• 39:26
  Speaker 6: That she's very particular with everything uh yes but it's
• 39:31
  Speaker 6: like the.
• 39:32
  Speaker 4: Process uh to learn you know like she want the
• 39:35
  Speaker 4: kitchen be like this every night she want this bed
• 39:37
  Speaker 4: like this every day like she don't want like have
• 39:41
  Speaker 4: put that don't put this here they're using your shoes
• 39:44
  Speaker 4: like I'm coming.
• 39:45
  Speaker 3: You're gonna make the world hate me even more laughing.
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: You're not helping Edward.
• 39:51
  Speaker 4: I'm coming to her space, you know, and I need
• 39:56
  Speaker 4: to understand the rules because she is opposite. She needs
• 40:01
  Speaker 4: to understand the rules in the arm. You know, it's
• 40:04
  Speaker 4: like the little things that they say about Derek the
• 40:07
  Speaker 4: other day. So I can give you a big example
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: with this. Before I'm coming to the country, Derek always
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: sit down in the front seat. And one day we
• 40:17
  Speaker 4: have a conversation. He say like, Oh, So I'm not
• 40:20
  Speaker 4: allowed to be in the front seat anymore. So I
• 40:23
  Speaker 4: feel bad about the kid because I'm coming from another country.
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: I'm coming to replace something that he want to do.
• 40:28
  Speaker 4: And I really don't care if I'm being in the back,
• 40:31
  Speaker 4: in the back seat. So I was saying like, you
• 40:33
  Speaker 4: know what, you don't need to, you can stay over there.
• 40:35
  Speaker 4: So it was like a joke, you know, and in
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: the show was a joke.
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: But people, even Edward was laughing.
• 40:41
  Speaker 4: I was laughing about it because like, I was, we
• 40:44
  Speaker 4: talking about this when in the moment I was not
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: expecting that it's coming like, you know, And like people
• 40:49
  Speaker 4: attack the little boy and her like horrible, like do like, I.
• 40:55
  Speaker 5: Think it's just that they see, or they form an
• 40:57
  Speaker 5: opinion by one small scene and that's probably the biggest challenge.
• 41:00
  Speaker 3: But yeah.
• 41:09
  Speaker 4: So like, uh, yeah, we have a lot of open downs,
• 41:12
  Speaker 4: but she's a wonderful woman. I really love being married,
• 41:15
  Speaker 4: you know? I think like everything is a process. And
• 41:19
  Speaker 4: right now we are the process like to be better.
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 41:22
  Speaker 4: You know, we just learn a lot of things about
• 41:24
  Speaker 4: one or the other. We respect a lot of things
• 41:27
  Speaker 4: right now. We have our boundaries. And I think like
• 41:29
  Speaker 4: this is something that helped us to be like in
• 41:32
  Speaker 4: the next level.
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah. We're growing.
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: I love that answer because I think. when you're thinking
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: about trying to adjust to one another and people have
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: fights and you get married and you learn things you
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: didn't know and people try to win or lose. But
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: I heard from both of you saying your fights, even
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: having to relive fights that are now being televised, what
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: you're doing is you're learning, you're growing, you're adjusting. I
• 41:57
  Speaker 1: love everything Edward said about learning how you need to
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: be loved versus how he wants to love you. And
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: isn't that what this is all about? It's not about
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: winning or losing or... being right or wrong. It's about
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: growing and accepting. And I, that's what I heard from
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: you all this entire time. So I think it's beautiful.
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: And I think it's brave that you all were able
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: to walk through a very difficult time in a very
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: treacherous path in front of the world and hear their
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: comments and read their judgments and still be together and
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: have your team mentality. Like that's what it's all about.
• 42:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 42:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 42:35
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I definitely think that growth is the key word
• 42:38
  Speaker 5: for us is growth. And even for me watching myself
• 42:41
  Speaker 5: back on TV and saying like, I could have done
• 42:43
  Speaker 5: that a lot better. You know, it's a growth experience
• 42:46
  Speaker 5: for me. It's a growth experience for him. But I
• 42:47
  Speaker 5: think the most important thing is that we communicate so well. And,
• 42:51
  Speaker 5: you know, we're just trying to make it work.
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: All right. Well, Melissa, we were able to tell you
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: in person, you know, we are true fans of the show.
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: It's been fun watching you after we met you. And
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: it's cool now, Edward, after we watched your whole season
• 43:03
  Speaker 2: to now meet you here. So it's an absolute pleasure. Congratulations.
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: I'm sure we'll see you all here in New York
• 43:08
  Speaker 2: at some point. We got to do this in studio.
• 43:10
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 43:11
  Speaker 5: Yes, we'd love to. We'd love to come back in
• 43:12
  Speaker 5: studio and see you guys.
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: All right, it's absolute pleasure. We want everybody to know
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: you can check out the 90 Day Fiance Tell All
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: Part 3. It is Sunday, 8 o'clock on TLC and
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: streaming next day on HBO Max.
• 43:25
  Speaker 1: You know we'll be watching, but for everyone listening, are
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: you trying to put your life back together after divorce? Well,
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: we can help. So send us an email, leave us
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: a voicemail. All the info is in the show notes,
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: so follow us on our socials as well. I do
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: part to an iHeartRadio podcast where falling in love is
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: the main objective.