Latest / A Capture Deep Vibs A Positive Space For Inspiration And Embracing Of Heart / Why Modern Dating Feels Impossible

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Why Modern Dating Feels Impossible · A Capture Deep Vibs A Positive Space For Inspiration And Embracing Of Heart

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: The man gets home after a long day of work.
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: He eats dinner alone as he scrolls through social media.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: He's bombarded with video after video of couples enjoying life together. Ugh,
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: I wish dating wasn't so impossible. I just don't have
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: the time. Cy, who is much smaller than the man,
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: jumps out of his phone. The man is shocked to
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: see him. Come with me. But, Cy? For the sake
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: of your future... Sai snaps their fingers, teleporting them somewhere
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: else with a zap. They get transported to a house
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: that looks exactly the same. The lovesick man is amazed
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: at first. This is just my house. And there you are.
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: This universe's version of the man is sprawled out on
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: a couch, looking messy. Sai and the man look over
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: his shoulder and see him texting multiple people at the
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: same time. The man gets up and they all go to.
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: The man looks over at a woman at the bar.
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: She seems to be there on her own until a man,
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: her boyfriend, joins her. The alternate lovesick man looks away
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: and sighs. The original lovesick man, watching on, is perplexed.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: He leans over to Sai and whispers, Sai, what is this?
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: Sai snaps their fingers, teleporting them. Zap. They are instantly
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: transported back to the original house. Sai, did you just
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: use the power of multiversal travel to show me another
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: world where I'm completely alone? No, I use the power
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: of multiversal travel to show you a world where you
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: have time. How is that supposed to help me? It
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: takes more than just time to find love. It depends
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: on how you use the time you have. I know,
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: but right now I can only ever meet people through
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: work and dating co-workers isn't allowed. Sai clicks their fingers. Zap.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: This universe's lovesick man is packing up his desk. Let
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: me guess. In this world, I got fired for dating
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: a co-worker. Not exactly. Another employee walks up to this
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: universe's lovesick man. She's sort of timid, but she has
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: a small note in her hands. Hey, it would be
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: a shame not to see you around. I know you'll
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: do great at your new job. Congrats, by the way.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: She pauses. So anyway, I just wanted to give you this.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: It's the name of a little place where me and
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: some friends meet. We'll be there on Friday. I was
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: hoping you might join us. The lovesick man reads the note.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: Gonna miss you, so make sure we still hang out.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: Judge in jury bar, quiz night, Friday 8pm. Hope you
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: can make it. X. The lovesick man looks up from
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: the note and smiles. Zap. So if I want to
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: date someone, I have to find a new job? Not
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: at all. The point is that you're always meeting people,
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: even if you don't realize it. As you move through
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: your life, there are always going to be people around you. Okay,
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: so you're telling me I do have enough time for
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: dating and I'm capable of meeting people? But if I
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: can only date people I've met when I leave my job,
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: it'll take years. There are always other ways of meeting people.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: Sai zaps them to another universe. The lovesick man says
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: hi to someone at the bookstore. She smiles at him
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: politely and walks away. He tries to talk to a waitress.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: She walks away. While getting groceries, he says hi to
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: another shopper. She hurriedly walks away. Sai and the original
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: lovesick man watch on as he fails. Sai zaps them
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: back to the main universe. I guess men can't just
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: strike up a conversation with women, but women probably wouldn't
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: start a conversation with men either. The average person doesn't
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: want to be hit on while they're at work or
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: trying to get errands done. Luckily, there are places specifically
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: for dating and finding people. Sai is about to snap
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: their fingers, but the man interrupts. Please don't tell me
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: you mean dating apps. I can't use those. Why not? Well,
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: I mean, they don't work, right? At least not for me.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: The only guys who succeed are ultra-rich, shredded guys who
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: have more confidence than I could ever handle. That's not me.
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: I don't need to take us to another universe to
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: know what your problem is. While it's true that women
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: seem to have an easier time on dating apps than men,
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: if you haven't tried, then maybe the greatest hurdle in
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: your way is your self-esteem. It's easy to get tricked
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: by social media into thinking you aren't desirable. The way
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: you view yourself can affect your approach to relationships. It's
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: a self-fulfilling prophecy. Rejection can mess with your self-esteem. Negative
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: self-esteem can make you feel like relationships aren't worth pursuing.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: So I pulls out a piece of paper. Take a
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: look at this literary review, for example. Studies show us
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: that high self-esteem doesn't just help with popularity and attractiveness.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: Your relationships could last longer and be more fulfilling when
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: there are fewer issues with self-esteem. Not to mention, high
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: self-esteem can help you improve your persistence, so you won't
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: give up so easily. So the key to making dating
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: seem less impossible is to improve my self-esteem? Improving your
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: self-esteem is easier said than done, but it is one
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: way to make dating a little easier. The best way
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: to improve your self-esteem is by working on yourself. Loving yourself.
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: Caring about yourself and pursuing the life you want. Come
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: with me. Sai snaps their fingers. Zap. Sai takes the
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: man to a world where the man focuses on himself.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: He works out a little, goes hiking in his free time,
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: and spends time with friends from work. He looks happy.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: One day, someone new joins their friend group. They make
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: eye contact... They fall in love. That doesn't have to
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: be some alternate universe. See, dating today feels impossible because
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: being a full, well-rounded individual feels impossible. To fix modern dating,
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: the best we can do is have patience. Look after
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: ourselves and continue to allow ourselves to fall in love. Yes,
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: dating someone at work isn't allowed, but you probably won't
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: be at that job forever. Yes, finding the time and
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: money to be romantic seems like a daydream, but that
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: applies to everyone. The right person will understand and is
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: probably thinking about that too. Don't listen to social media.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: Not only does it give you a warped view of
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: what your role in a relationship is, but it also
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: makes you think there are specific criteria you need to
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: meet in order to even be an option for dating.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: If there is someone you like or truly love, there
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: is always a way to make it work, as long
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: as they feel the same way. And if you haven't
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: met someone yet, there is so much you can do
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: for yourself to make you feel worthy. Which you already are.
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: But build your confidence. Live the life you want and
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: love will follow. A study published in the Personality and
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: Social Psychology Bulletin found that the best way to motivate
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: yourself for self-improvement is to have self-compassion. Self-improvement is really
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: just the pursuit of a more fulfilling, well-rounded life. Just
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: remember that love takes time. Whether you're learning to love
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: yourself or want to love someone else, approach it with
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: care and compassion. Thanks, Sai. Any time. Now I need
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: to teach someone about their attachment style, so I better
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: get going. Good luck. Psy climbs back into the man's phone.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: He waves at the man and jumps back into the phone.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: We hope you enjoyed this video. If you did, let
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: us know by leaving a like. What has been the
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: biggest challenge in modern dating for you? Let us know
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: in the comments. Remember to subscribe to Psych2Go for more
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: videos like this. Good luck. See you next time.